Plateau Mama Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 (edited) Why dont Dr.'s tell you the real story of what recovery will be like? Just why? I had surgery several years ago. Dr. Said, do it over Christmas so you will have help. You will be fine by new years. So I did and then my husband had to travel the first week of the year. The Dr. neglected to tell me that I would still be in a cast but it would be semi removable but I wouldn't be able to lift my young children. We had an ice storm the day dh left and my 1yo got a 105 fever and had to go to urgent care in the middle of the night. Last week I had surgery on my hand. I asked several times how long is recovery. "Oh, its no big deal. You will be able to drive yourself home." I asked when I scheduled when I would be able to travel. Oh as soon as you get your stitches out you will have no restrictions. Blah blah blah. I did my own research and discovered i would be out of commision 10-14 days because I couldn't really use the hand a then it would be up to 6 weeks before I was back to normal. Well yesterday I get my stitches out and he tells me I can get it we but not submerged for 10 days. I leave for vacation in 5. I mean why. Why can't they tell me before hand, you will not be able to get your hand wet for 3 weeks. Two weeks you will be useless and up to 6 weeks before your hand works properly. I mean, if I worked that would be critical information to have. Fortunatly I researched for myself and knew the answers so I was able to get it done and recuperate (I hope) before my job starts again the the fall. Edited July 18, 2017 by Plateau Mama 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILiveInFlipFlops Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Why dont Dr.'s tell you the real story of what recovery will be like? Just why? I had surgery several years ago. Dr. Said, do it over Christmas so you will have help. You will be fine by new years. So I did and then my husband had to travel the first week of the year. The Dr. neglected to tell me that I would still be in a cast but it would be semi removable but I wouldn't be able to lift my young children. We had an ice storm the day dh left and my 1yo got a 105 fever and had to go to urgent care in the middle of the night. Last week I had surgery on my hand. I asked several times how long is recovery. "Oh, its no big deal. You will be able to drive yourself home." I asked when I scheduled when I would be able to travel. Oh as soon as you get your stitches out you will have no restrictions. Blah blah blah. I did my own research and discovered i would be out of commision 10-14 days because I couldn't really use the hand a then it would be up to 6 weeks before I was back to normal. Well yesterday I get my stitches out and he tells me I can get it we but not submerged for 10 days. I leave for vacation in 5. I mean why. Why can't they tell me before hand, you will not be able to get your hand wet for 3 weeks. Two weeks you will be useless and up to 6 weeks before your hand works properly. I mean, if I worked that would be critical information to have. Fortunatly I researched for myself and knew the answers so I was able to get it done and recuperate (I hope) before my job starts again the the fall. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Our family is just dealing with something very similar, and it's very frustrating. My dad is not real thrilled with medical professionals right now! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amber in SJ Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Good for you, for doing your own research. It is hard when you don't get the full story about recovery time. I hope your recovery goes smoothly and that you are able to enjoy your vacation. Amber in SJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amo_mea_filiis. Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Maybe people will refuse the procedure if they know more? Or maybe they go by absolute best case patients? I always do my own research and go by my own history. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plateau Mama Posted July 18, 2017 Author Share Posted July 18, 2017 Good for you, for doing your own research. It is hard when you don't get the full story about recovery time. I hope your recovery goes smoothly and that you are able to enjoy your vacation. Amber in SJ I am going where it is really hot and I can't swim the first 1/2 of the trip. I will survive, but, well mayby not. This wimpy Pacific NW girl has a hard time in the heat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plateau Mama Posted July 18, 2017 Author Share Posted July 18, 2017 Maybe people will refuse the procedure if they know more? Or maybe they go by absolute best case patients? I always do my own research and go by my own history. Well, for me, I was in so much pain daily that I had no choice. But seriously if they tell you you will be fine in two weeks but the reality is 6 weeks not a lot of people can call up their job and say hey, turns out I need 4 more weeks. I mean, I fot my stitches out but I cant hold/grab anything. I can't write. Not a lot of jobs I would be able to do right now. I had to wait 3 months for this procedure. It's not like they are hurting for patients. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 :grouphug: I felt a similar anger toward the surgeon who did my gall bladder surgery for telling me recovery would be a breeze and I probably wouldn't even need ibuprofen, let alone any strong pain meds. Ridiculous! It would be much better to prepare for the worst and have an easier recovery than expected, so I don't get why some doctors are overly optimistic when describing the potential after-effects. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Maybe they want one to be pleasantly surprised..... :glare: I find many doctors might be good at certain aspects of their job, but very lousy at others. Like compassion. I mean you'd think as a doctor, one would have compassion...but no..not always. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Surgeons have god complexes. Most of them have never undergone surgery themselves and aren't the caretakers of loved ones who have. Once they lay hands on you, you should immediately be healed! ;) 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caclcoca Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 When I had surgery on my hand, the surgeon told me that I would be thankful that I had the procedure done two weeks later. I went in 3 weeks after surgery and saw a nurse. I was complaining that I still didn't have strength in my hand. I couldn't slice strawberries. His words to me were, "People always come in here 2-3 weeks after surgery wanting 2-3 month results." Maybe because the doctor said I would feel great after two weeks. It was a full three months before my strength returned. I agree that I want the truth up front, so I can be prepared. I hope you enjoy your vacation! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 I also look up things on the internet to find out the truth. That was why I wasn't surprised that I didn't recover from pneumonia quickly. What I know now is that I need to always have a pulmonologist. Because I didn't get the extra medication I needed to breathe right until after I saw him more than two months after my initial illness. I am still on the higher dose of Advair and have four other asthma medications along with that one. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollyDay Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 This and this again!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Several years ago I had a surgery, and the (specialist) doc knew I had a trip planned with my children just a few days after the surgery date. She said it would be a minor procedure, and that I would be able to walk within a few days. We specifically talked about the number of hours in the car, the hike down into Carlsbad Caverns, the descent angle, how far, etc. (Apparently there was an elevator back up.) She said I would be fine to do that 3-4 days after the surgery. Surgery went beautifully, exactly as planned, not more complicated or more extensive than planned. Between that conversation and the surgery date, we found out that my mother had cancer, changed our plans, and expected to pull out for a road trip to go see her instead. (We had a two week window between the end of the school year before kids' summer commitments started up.) The ride to see her should have been easier than the hike, given the kind of surgery. A week out from the surgery, I was still on hands and knees in agony. It took weeks for the surgery site to heal. I rode to see my mom on a mattress in the back of our SUV and felt accomplished that I was able to sit up part of the way home. A couple of years later I was talking with my GP, and we discussed the surgery. She said that surgery was one of the most difficult surgeries to recover from, and that it has a reputation for being horribly painful to boot. I told her I don't normally complain about doctors to doctors, but that she needed to know not to refer anyone to the specialist, as she was all kinds of terrible...this was just one of the ways. Since then, hubby and I have made it a point to ask docs to give us the unvarnished truth about how this or that kind of surgery goes for most people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Random Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 I'll add to this vent! Same thing happened to me. A *male* GYN telling me the recovery will be no big deal, it's an easy minor surgery, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. NO. What a crock. DH travels for work and is gone all but 7-8 days per month. Gah. :nopity: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Maybe they want one to be pleasantly surprised..... :glare: I find many doctors might be good at certain aspects of their job, but very lousy at others. Like compassion. I mean you'd think as a doctor, one would have compassion...but no..not always. That was one of the best things about dh's cardiologist and surgeon. They were compassionate, and they also were most reassuring that, yes, it was difficult, and this or that complication was pure misery, but that dh would make it through: this was confidently stated, not couched in positive percentages. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teachermom2834 Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Agreed!! Years ago I had my varicose veins treated. It was a series of inpatient procedures. Every single one they sold as no big deal. Oh it's just a pinprick, etc etc. The treatment was not horrible but compared to how it was sold it was horrific. It was successful and I'm glad I had it done but that doctor and everyone who worked there was a liar! I also think C-sections should be treated as a bigger deal. Maybe they are routine for the doctor but not for the patient. My baby was a year old and I tried to do a sit up and realized I had no strength in my abdomen. Of course some kind of exercises or rehab should be suggested post surgery but there was no rehab or recovery addressed unless I blocked it out. Also so many things that are not truly painful are still very uncomfortable. I would like the discomfort acknowledged even if it isn't severe pain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 I am going where it is really hot and I can't swim the first 1/2 of the trip. I will survive, but, well mayby not. This wimpy Pacific NW girl has a hard time in the heat. I'm just ornery enough that I'd put a bag over that hand and still be able to get in the water. I'm sorry, Plateau Mama!! :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Oh, I hear you. Every media al procedure I have had was downplayed as far as pain, recovery time, and return to functionality were concerned. When I complained, I was treated like a whiner. 3rd degree perineal laceration. with first birth. The nurse commented on how it was on a 3rd degree. I didn't know what she meant. All I knew was that, when the pain meds wore off, I couldn't sit for 2 weeks, bms caused excruciating pain ... so much so that I developed anismus. I later found out that this was a tear into the anal sphincter and that the repair had failed. With my ankle surgery, the pain was not well controlled. A couple hours of relief and hours of agonizing pain between doses. They didn't tell me that I would be as good as bedridden for weeks. That was such a fiasco and my pain was minimized. Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bootsie Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 I had hand surgery two years ago and experienced the same thing. I think much of it had to do with the surgeon never had experienced go around with bandaged hands that didn't work. Two weeks ago DH had shoulder surgery--I was careful to ask all kinds of questions about recovery when we got the "the only thing is your arm will be in a sling and you can't drive for six weeks" As I started asking "What about..." it was clear that there were some things the surgeon had never considered. Other things seemed to be obvious to the surgeon because he deals with it every day and it didn't dawn on him to mention Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alisoncooks Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Yes. With my ACL surgery, I was vastly unprepared for the degree of recovery required. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 I had an ectopic pregnancy (on Mirena) years ago and was offered methotrexate as my "best" option, avoiding (laproscopic) surgery. This was over the winter holidays. Of course I wanted to avoid surgery. No one told me the nearly 30% fail rate. I wound up with a full open emergency surgery while visiting relatives for New Years. (Mirena had a <1% fail rate. Like I'd knowingly mess with 30 after that?!?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizzie in Ma Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 They never do, do they? :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessMommy Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 When I had surgery on my hand, the surgeon told me that I would be thankful that I had the procedure done two weeks later. I went in 3 weeks after surgery and saw a nurse. I was complaining that I still didn't have strength in my hand. I couldn't slice strawberries. His words to me were, "People always come in here 2-3 weeks after surgery wanting 2-3 month results." Maybe because the doctor said I would feel great after two weeks. It was a full three months before my strength returned. I agree that I want the truth up front, so I can be prepared. I hope you enjoy your vacation! yup... this so much. I want to know all about recovery. I've had it happen 2x where the doctor underestimated the time of recovery. It's discouraging when they say, "you'll feel back to normal in 10days" and you aren't. :cursing: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne in CA Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Anyone who knows me IRL would laugh like crazy to see someone call me a whiner, but docs have done it several times. Even the time I almost died after I asked about a D&C, but was told it was not needed, but later almost bled to death. Whiner. The ONLY people to call me a whiner (in so many words) in my adult life have all been doctors. No one else would be that nutty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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