Spouse work hard so you can homeschool?

[Blessedfamily]

For those who are married, does your spouse work extra hard, maybe putting up with a bunch of junk at work, or working overtime so you can homeschool? Don't you really appreciate that?

 

I don't know how I could do this if my DH was not supportive. I mean it costs a lot of money, considering your tax money is paying for a public education your child isn't using.

 

I hope this isn't too personal (Judging by some of the threads I've seen here :w00t: I doubt it.)

[Mom2jnb]

I appreciate all that my dh does. He knows I work hard at what I do but the whole PS taxes thing...I think that is what grinds him the most. We just wish there was a way that we could submit expenses to the PS system and get a percentage back or something but that is another thread... heee heee

 

Yes, I appreciate him all he does...in fact we are getting ready to make a move to a deliberately homeschool friendly state since I would not move to a state with restrictive homeschool laws and he had to limit his search when his job was eliminated at his current employer. I certainly do NOT tell him enough how much I appreciate him though :(

 

Alison

[TammyinTN]

My spouse works very hard for our family and our country. He's a military man. :D He fully supports homeschooling and works hard to provide not only our needs but many of our wants. I feel very blessed to have him as a support system and is always a team player for our family.

 

We have had some rather difficult situations with our daughters when they went to public school so once the choice was made to homeschool he was thrilled.

[missplacedalaskan]

My Dh is also a military guy. He works very hard and has made some huge career decisions that have allowed us to continue homeschooling. I am so thankful for all that he does for us. He is a huge blessing & support for me, and I pray that I never lose my appreciation of/for him.

[Kari C in SC]

My dh moved 2 states away so we could continue to homeschool. When I started homeschooling my oldest 10 years ago - I had a work at home job with excellent pay and benefits. I was laid off at the end of 2006. I was given the option of a different position in the company, but it meant full time and in the office. My dh said he didn't want that for me or the kids. So... began the long saga of trying to sell our Florida house and moving to South Carolina where the cost of living is less. The idea was to sell our house and pay for our new how with cash in SC. It hasn't quite worked out that way since we coudln't sell our Florida house. BUT... we are renting that house and it is covering both house payments. Whew... all this to say that YES - my dh is wonderful! He truly loves Florida, but has given that up so I can continue to be home. He is amazing!

[Tracey in TX]

DH does work hard in order to offer us the lifestyle we lead. This allows me to stay at home and not worry about bringing in extra income. We both served in the military, and have made numerous sacrifices to do so. Even when one gets out or retires from the military, the legacy lives on!

 

He usually supports homeschool, until he hears from friends about the evils or flaws in homeschool. Most of the time he is thrilled we currently homeschool!

 

We often discuss finances and the possibility of a recession turning into a full-blown global depression. That is frightening! Until then we'll watch our spending and hope the economy turns around. No matter what DH will work hard in order to give his family a splendid life.

[LaMere Academy]

My husband works 2 jobs so I can homeschool the kids. He has always done this when needed. He did have about 5 years where he didn't have to, but for the past 3 he has had two jobs again. It's rough and I hate it but we can't survive unless he does. I do appreciate it very much.

[gandpsmommy]

Yes, I certainly appreciate how hard he has always worked to make it possible for me to stay at home and care for our children from the time of their births and how hard he continues to work so that we can homeschool. And that he never complains about my buying books or taking the kids to museums. And that he makes it possible for me to buy the curriculum that works best for us, no matter how expensive it is, (though I wouldn't buy curr. frivolously; I do an extensive amount of research before purchasing, and usually end up with a pretty good fit!) And that he is so completely supportive of our educational endeavors, and praises me in public. (I think his coworkers have an unrealistically high opinion of me, in fact, as they have never met me and he says such nice things about me and my mothering and teaching.) And that this week he brought us with him on a business trip to a conference, where we have gotten to stay in a beautiful hotel, swim in the pools, relax in the whirpool hot tub, go out to eat, visit an art museum, go shopping, and most of all enjoy spending time with him when he is off instead of waiting at home all week missing him. I have a terrific husband who does work very hard for us!

[Danestress]

It's honestly just his nature - a matter of self respect for him that when one has a job to do, one does it well. So yes, he works hard.

 

But he also is good at playing and relaxing at the appropriate time.

[MeanestMomInMidwest]

My dh is a pilot (its not as romantic as it sounds, btw) and I work part time, trying to pick up shifts only when he's home so he can be the "substitute teacher." Our decision to hs was truly "our decision." I think he's more gung-ho than I am about it sometimes. I am thankful that he understands that most of the hs burden falls on me (I researched how to do it, I choose curriculum, I do most of the teaching & set schedules, etc. and am alone with the kids 23-25 days each month while he's gone flying). Sometimes when he's home and I'm not working we split the kids and get more hs'ing done in less time. He has also offered to sub for me so I can get an all-day-away-from-home break, but it hasn't happened yet...I'm saving it for a time when I feel like my sanity is in jeapordy or I'm *this close* to strangling the kids....Maybe next week.

[Audrey]

We have more of an equal distribution partnership. We both work hard so that we can both homeschool our son.

[Parrothead]

Not to say that I'm not proud of dh because I am very proud of what he has accomplished. He has a slightly cushy job now. He worked very hard to get to where he is though. In the beginning there were months when he worked a mandatory 6 days a week 12-14 hours a day.

 

And I am thankful that he followed through and got his current job. There is a story behind that too.

[StaceyinLA]

There have been times when he has worked 2 jobs (when he wanted us to be debt-free). The thing is, my 4 kids are his STEP-children. Their father won't do anything to help. He pays $500/mo child support for FOUR TEENAGERS (and has been paying that for about 5 years. Before that we went 2+ years with NONE). Dh took up all the slack and has been fantastic!!

[Carrie12345]

He worked this hard before we homeschooled, and I have always appreciated it. In fact just this morning I texted him telling him thank you for working so hard and never giving up when times get tough. I know he appreciates hearing that I appreciate him. :D

 

Same here. Dh has been working hard from day 1, way before homeschooling was even a blip on our radar, and while I was working. He's been in the same industry, with the same crazy hours and the same crazy work load since before we were married. He's good at what he does, and he doesn't plan to give it up until retirement time.

 

But yes, it's very much appreciated.

[sleepy]

Yes. Dh is self-employed, and he works 10hr days 6 or 7 days/week.

[elegantlion]

Yes. Dh is self-employed, and he works 10hr days 6 or 7 days/week.

 

Oh, yeah, that here too. It hasn't just been since we started homeschooling, it's been since ds was born. We rarely have a quiet evening without someone calling about business. I guess that's good for business, but I asked to smash his last cell phone because the ringer drove me crazy. He wouldn't let me.

 

Dh is pretty driven and would probably work hard whether we homeschooled or not.

[dcjlkplus3]

My dh would work hard whatever his job. He works long hours at a job he doesn't really like so that I can stay home and teach the kids and not have to go to work. He reminds me all the time that this is my full time job and that it is way more important than a little extra money (as nice as that would be) and he even tells me that I am good at it and how much he appreciates what I do.:D

[clwcain]

I am the working-for-pay dh in our house.

 

I don't know that I'd characterize my work as hard, but it's not something I would do if I wasn't paid well to do it. Tedious and irritating, but it's sedentary, cerebral, relatively predictable (including the occasional very late nights), and doesn't involve anything illegal, immoral, or degrading.

 

We are blessed that it permits my dw to stay home and raise the kids, including homeschooling.

 

There are a bunch of other things I'd rather do, but we'd have to give up homeschooling (among other things) if I were to take a pay cut and "follow my bliss".

[Dawn in OH]

My dh would work hard whatever his job. He works long hours at a job he doesn't really like so that I can stay home and teach the kids and not have to go to work. He reminds me all the time that this is my full time job and that it is way more important than a little extra money (as nice as that would be) and he even tells me that I am good at it and how much he appreciates what I do.:D

 

Wow. For a minute there I thought I posted a reply already and had forgotten about it.

 

In all honesty though, I'm kind of lonely and I miss him. I married this great guy so that I could be with him and I hardly see him. Sleeping next to him for 6 hours doesn't really count as seeing him!

[bumbledeb]

Yes, my dh works really hard. He typically gets up at about 4 am and works till 10 or 11 pm. Sometimes he works right through the night. I think he'd do that even if we weren't homeschooling though. He runs his own business and feels an obligation to his clients.

[Cornerstone Classical]

Yes, my dh works hard long hours so that we can homeschool. He even gets a second seasonal job to pay for the holidays. He doesn't have to but he does. He has a very generous heart to make sure everyone has what they need and want. On the flipside, we all take care of him. We make sure we do EVERYTHING for him so that, he just worries about working. Every evening we all watch TV together and I rub his head and back and the kids take turns rubbing his feet. Some times I think he works hard just to get the massages!!!!:lol:

[Paintedlady]

Oh yes, my dh works very hard to allow me to stay at home and hs our kids. He works his regular full time job M-F and has a part time job he works every Sat & most Sundays, putting in additional 12-24 hours. I also work part time 10 hours a week.

 

As far as paying taxes to the public schools, it's a hard pill for me to swallow. We have the highest taxes in our county, and our town is not one the rich towns that surround us. Out of the $4,600 a year we pay, I think $3,600-3,800 of it goes to the schools. That blows my mind, and not in a good way. :confused:

[RoughCollie]

My DH works 7 days a week, 10-12 hours a day, and we all appreciate it very much. He is self-employed and has a profession and a business.

[Alice]

My dh doesn't exactly work hard for me to be able to homeschool but he has made sacrifices in other ways. He takes off several afternoons a week so that I can work. Financially this makes sense for us as I can make a lot more working part-time than he makes even working full-time. Also, it enables me to stay involved, even a little bit with my career. But it has negatively impacted his career...he has been passed over for a promotion and will probably not advance beyond his current position because of being part-time. I know this bothers him a bit, but he has never complained. He also does much more around the house than most other husbands and fathers I know and plans on having an active role in homeschooling. (In fact he is currently doing all the planning for a couple of weeks to get an idea of what it's like. :))

 

Just to say that I'm incredibly grateful for him and every day aware of how blessed I am...but that I think it's more about us both working hard to do what's best for our family. Which is pretty much what everyone here does, it just looks different for everyone.

[mysticamethyst]

I thank him almost everyday for the hard work he does. He supports our life and schooling choices and has said before he would work any number of hours to keep it this way. :001_smile:

[Rosy]

Yes, I am definitely grateful for DH working hard at his regular job every day and then doing freelance work in the evenings so I can homeschool the kids. I think he would say, though, that he's grateful for the hard work I do in homeschooling. He's sorry to miss out on our zoo trips or trips to the beach, but he wouldn't trade my being at home for anything. He's also really good about letting me pursue my interests--ministry or hobbies or friends or co-op leadership, and I try to do the same for him.

[Prairie~Phlox]

My dh does work hard, but I also feel that I pick up all of the slack at home, I mow, I take care of the house, I always make sure everything is taken care of. Now Don't get me wrong, I do appreciate all that he does and he is 100% for homeschooling and would not have it any other way, but he doesn't work extra hard for us to get ahead of anything. He relaxes on the weekends and doesn't always get things done around here that need to be done. Sometimes I think it would be less stress not having to take care of a house (meaning rent so it's someone elses problem) I get tired of nagging that such and such needs to be done IYKWIM. Plus, I feel like we just scrape by. He would rather have debt. than take a second job or let me get a job.

Just my feelings.

Phlox

[HRAAB]

My dh works very hard at a job he detests. But he also works very hard at home repairing things himself and such to save on money. He spent last weekend at junkyards finding a used transmission - not the way you want to spend your weekend. We have a very large garden and orchard that he tends. Most of his time is spent working for his family.

 

I do my share, too. I'm very frugal with our income, watch where every penny goes. Right now I'm canning/freezing everything he's grown. It's absolutely a shared job. I couldn't do it without him, and he tell me often he couldn't do it without me.

 

Janet

[Jill- OK]

I mean, my husband does work hard, there's no doubt about that...it's just the "so you can homeschool" part that has me scratching my head.

 

I can understand folks saying that they appreciate their husband keeping a job he hates, in order to provide financial security...that's a big deal. But my husband would be doing what he's doing, whether we homeschooled/had kids or not. He'd still have to eat, if he was single, lol, so he'd still work (probably at the same sort of job, which he loves), and he'd probably pursue his career to an even greater degree than he does, now.*

 

He's a believer in homeschooling, but he's not the go-ahead-and-buy-whatever-you-need, money-is-no-object kinda guy. In fact, money is one of our hot button issues...that's probably why this is a tricky subject for me, because of views about earning power, family roles, and money. :-(

 

Anyway, all that to say that I do appreciate dh's hard work...I just feel a little funny focusing on that part of a dad's contribution, since he'd be working anyway. A dad's support/role, to me, is more than his paycheck (not saying that's not important, though! Don't get me wrong!). What I think is extraordinary is the man who works hard at a job, then comes home and actively parents, and takes part in the dynamic that he and his partner have decided on.

 

*Okay, this is what I think I'm grateful for; the fact that my husband has made certain choices about not pursuing particular career goals, at the expense of his family. I'm not saying his priorities are always perfect, but he has made decisions in our favor, and 'sacrificed' in this way.

[Guest]

Dh is a very hard worker. He always has been and I am sure he always will be - it is his personality. He has a very hard time sitting still, always likes to take on a new project. :) I am so grateful for him and wish that I showed and expressed it more.

 

He is supportive of homeschooling and he is becoming quite excellent at re-assuring me that everything is going to be okay. ;) Great guy.

 

To answer the OP, no, he hasn't changed anything specifically for homeschooling.

[Jennifer3141]

Spouse works like a maniac, period. I am grateful that we can homeshcool the way I want to though.

 

Jen