What is the youngest age at which you have left your baby/child? And for how long?

[Aspasia]

Dh is going to Italy for work. We spontaneously decided that I will join him(!) and we already bought my ticket. But now I'm having second thoughts. My baby will only be 10 1/2 months old. I've never left a a baby this little for days at a time. MIL will be coming to stay, so baby will still be in her normal environment, with her siblings and her normal routine. But I'm definitely worried that she's going to be negatively affected by my absence. Everyone who knows me knows I need a break, but now I just feel selfish. What was I thinking?

[mom2bee]

Growing up, my family kept babies as young as 6 months while their mother went on a much needed and much deserved trip both for recreational or business/medical purposes. Everything from just 1 night to just over 2 weeks.

 

The babies--I think about 6 or 7 of them--have always adapted fine within a couple of days and been thrilled to see mommy when she comes back. It might take a few days for mommy and baby to resettle, but I don't think its selfish at all. Your trip is an investment--in both your marriage and your kids. Your kids deserve a mom who can refresh and care for them at her peak from time to time.

 

 

I encourage you to not feel guilty. To go and do your best to enjoy your trip, enjoy your husband, enjoy the quiet and bring back a gift for the kids.

[Truscifi]

One year for the older, about 9 months for the younger. The kids will be fine. Enjoy your trip!

[SKL]

Learn how to skype, leave some clothes or a blanket of yours in your baby's crib (for your smell), make sure the caregivers know your exact routine, and don't worry.  :)  Babies bounce back from much longer separations, e.g., hospitalizations etc.

 

To answer your question, my kids were in foster care for the first 9 / 12mos of their lives.  Once I had custody, I didn't leave them for more than a day when they were very little, partly because of their special needs regarding bonding/attachment.  But around age 4 or 5 they were fine having multi-day overnights with relatives.  In other words, they were not scarred for life, even with a big disruption in custody when they were babies.

[Gil]

Go on the trip and enjoy yourself. Humans--even baby humans--are a resilient bunch. The baby will be fine--she'll have grandma, siblings, home and routine to keep her company and comfortable.

[Chelli]

6 months old and I was gone for almost two weeks.

 

I had the opportunity to go to Italy with my husband as well and couldn't pass up such a once in a lifetime chance.

 

Everything was fine while I was gone, but I was glad to see my kids again.

 

Go and have a good time.

[Katy]

You're not selfish, you're lucky!  Go, enjoy your trip, and use FaceTime as much as possible.

[Aspasia]

Oh, you ladies are so great. Thank you so much for not shaming me! 

 

I just got off the phone with MIL, and she told me that she actually left dh at about this same age, and I think he turned out just fine. ;) 

 

Okay, I'm gonna do this and I'm just going to love it. 

 

 

[Rachel]

Oh, you ladies are so great. Thank you so much for not shaming me!

 

I just got off the phone with MIL, and she told me that she actually left dh at about this same age, and I think he turned out just fine. ;)

 

Okay, I'm gonna do this and I'm just going to love it.

Have a blast! I had the opportunity to go to Alaska when my daughter was about that age. Taking her wasn't an option and I was nervous at first, but ended up having a great time. She had her brother and grandma and everyone survived fine without me.

[Night Elf]

I left my son at age 8 months for a week long cruise that was a delayed honeymoon for me and DH. He stayed with my cousin and aunt who lavished him with love and attention. When I returned, he was perfectly fine. His routine had not been interrupted, even though he was in a different house. I did miss him, of course, but he did really well while we were gone and I was happy we went.

[Tsuga]

Don't remember, maybe 18 months on a work trip. They stayed with friends. They were fine. It was actually harder when they were 3 and 5. You go and have fun!

[Jennifer132]

I traveled to China when my oldest was around nine months. He totally forgot about me until I came back. Then he burst out crying when he saw me! I haven't really left any of the others except for over night in the hospital while having the next child!

[Okra]

Baby will be fine!  Go on you vacation and have a great time.  :)

 

[Hwin]

I haven't left a baby that young, but I've never been offered a trip to Italy, either. Have a great time!

[Loowit]

My middle was about 2 years old, and my oldest was 4 years old.  We went on a 2 night trip for our anniversary.  I was pregnant with youngest and we knew that this would be our last chance to get away for a couple nights for a long time.  I couldn't have left middle any sooner because I was nursing and wanted to let him self wean.  It was a personal choice.  My youngest didn't get left overnight until last year, he would have been 8, when we went out of town for a night.

 

I hope you have a wonderful trip!

[rocassie]

I hope you have a wonderful trip.  I've yet to leave my kiddos for more than an overnight, but I haven't had the opportunity nor a trusted caregiver that's willing to do it. 

 

Your kiddos are in good hands, and what a wonderful bonding experience for your MIL and respite for you and your DH.  Your MIL may deal with some rough moments, but everyone will benefit from this trip.  Enjoy yourself, be thankful for your MIL, give your kiddos big hugs and kisses, and expect to be mobbed when you get home.  :)

[FaithManor]

For an overnight, probably around 6 months. For a few hours, I left dd when she was 3 weeks old.

 

I think that if you trust your care providers, you should go on the trip and enjoy yourself.

[Carrie12345]

I've left kids for several days as young as a few weeks and waited with others for 11 months.  Not necessarily for any particular reason, that's just the way it went.  And it went just fine, either way!

[Susan in TN]

No guilt! Baby will be fine. Have a wonderful trip!

 

(Youngest Dd was 3 when I left the country for 12 days - she doesn't remember. Everyone was just fine.)

[fraidycat]

7 weeks old, 3 nights. I had to go do immigration interview and paperwork to finalize.

 

It was hard on Me, but I don't think DD missed me one bit. She had aunties to spoil her. :)

[Anne in CA]

I have a friend whose ex dh made her leave her kids every year for his drinking vacation in Mazatlan and they are fine. She left them as small infants with her father and step mother who are really kid people and loved having them. Her ex wanted to take the kids to Mazatlan this year and was shocked when she said no, he drinks too much to watch them, lol.

[gardenmom5]

if you trust your mom with baby, and baby is happy with mom, things will probably be fine.  you might want to have your mom come a couple days early to get a hands on familiarity with baby's schedule.

 

I didn't wean mine until 18 months, so I didn't go anywhere overnight without them until after that.

 

 

2dd was the one who gave me trouble when I left her in the middle of the night to go have a baby. she wouldn't come near me the next day.  she was 3 1/2.

[pehp]

I think you will be just fine, but you may want to be prepared for some clinginess upon your return and maybe some sleep disturbances.  A friend experienced this after leaving her preschooler for a week or so to go out of the country.  

 

Have a lovely time!!!

[Aspasia]

Update: Baby seemed to do fine with MIL. MIL said she did become increasingly clingy as the week went on, but she didn't really cry, napped and slept well, and seemed pretty happy. I had an AMAZING time wandering the streets of Rome by myself while dh was in meetings. And when I got home, baby went right back to nursing, as if I had never left. So there ya go. I'm so glad I went!

[kitten18]

Update: Baby seemed to do fine with MIL. MIL said she did become increasingly clingy as the week went on, but she didn't really cry, napped and slept well, and seemed pretty happy. I had an AMAZING time wandering the streets of Rome by myself while dh was in meetings. And when I got home, baby went right back to nursing, as if I had never left. So there ya go. I'm so glad I went!

Awesome. :D

 

I left my nurslings (5 and 15 months) for 5 days and they went right back to nursing.

[Tsuga]

Update: Baby seemed to do fine with MIL. MIL said she did become increasingly clingy as the week went on, but she didn't really cry, napped and slept well, and seemed pretty happy. I had an AMAZING time wandering the streets of Rome by myself while dh was in meetings. And when I got home, baby went right back to nursing, as if I had never left. So there ya go. I'm so glad I went!

 

YAY! So glad you got to go and MIL got good bonding time. :)