DawnM Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 I am tired of being a Mom I am tired of being a homeschool Mom I have tired of being a wife I am tired of being a stay at home wife This has been a rough few days and I can't really pinpoint why, other than I am TIRED emotionally. Physically I am fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linders Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 :grouphug: I know I've had periods like this, and I don't have an easy answer when DH needs to work (often long hours or out of town) and DC need to eat/learn. I hope you can figure out some way to create a break for yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kim in Appalachia Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 :grouphug: I've felt like that, and it's hard. :grouphug: Try and find something you can do for yourself. Maybe a weekend away, a retreat of some sort. You need a break. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LLMom Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 It is that time of year. So sorry you are feeling this way. Hopefully, it is fleeting. Try to do something just for yourself. If you think it is burnout, you might want to check out some ideas I wrote on getting a handle on homeschool burnout. I have had these feelings many times over my 18 years of homeschooling. Most of the time they go away but sometimes not. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted January 14, 2014 Author Share Posted January 14, 2014 I don't know if it is homeschooling or simply being a mom~! But you are right, it is that time of year…….winter stinks. I didn't have this problem when I lived in California. But my life was very different in CA. I worked outside the home, kids were in school, and I had energy. It is that time of year. So sorry you are feeling this way. Hopefully, it is fleeting. Try to do something just for yourself. If you think it is burnout, you might want to check out some ideas I wrote on getting a handle on homeschool burnout. I have had these feelings many times over my 18 years of homeschooling. Most of the time they go away but sometimes not. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 :grouphug: Been there. Do something for yourself. And don't feel guilty about it. I'm betting that you do tons of stuff for your kids and your dh and that doing stuff for you falls to the bottom of the list. Put yourself at the top for a whole day. You might need to plan in advance, make a meal ahead of time or something, but that's ok. Your older kids can do without you for a day and they can watch the youngest one. Dh is capable of being in charge of meals and cleanup for a day. Is there something you want to do? Go window shopping, get a haircut, renew a hobby? Winter is hard for me. I just feel out of sorts. It makes me cranky about things...things that don't bother me at all if they happen in the spring or summer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted January 14, 2014 Author Share Posted January 14, 2014 Actually I have been out too much! We are out every single day now. Last night i was supposed to go to a committee meeting. I bailed. I just couldn't take it. The same old stuff rehashed for 2 hours or more yet again. This kind of stuff didn't happen when I was in the workplace. An agenda was adhered to, problems were solved, and we went on with our day. I think I need to hold up in my room ALONE, watch some movies or TV, and tell the kids to fend for themselves. Dawn Eat well. If you have cabin fever, get out!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 Hmmm... I started having more of these feelings right around age 40. Some weeks there is nothing I can do but right out the wave. I do use medication and see someone to help me sort out the real from the hormone induced feelings, but still some days are just that way. ;) One thing that has helped me a great deal, is to go ahead and be a little selfish. It is only costing us $ so far, but I have taken one of my hobbies and am trying to make a go of it as a business. I am thankful my DH is supportive and willing to lose a little $ to give me a creative outlet that feeds my skill set. I was not a professional dishwasher and cleaner-of-messes before marriage so I really don't get the same rush from cleaning catsup off the floor as I do from setting up a pricing database. KIWM? The key for me, and key danger, is maintaining balance. The jobs I do at home may not be my areas of strength, but they are still very important- more important than what I do elsewhere. So I have to make sure I feed my need to do something I enjoy with the needs of my household. I also believe that letting the children see me start and manage a small business is educational. One of my children is an artist so she needs to learn how to sell her work and make a profit. The others can tranlaste the budgeting and time management skills into any career they choose. So it's a win-win. (Except the dishes don't always get done on schedule. LOL) I am an extreme introvert, btw, so I totally get the locking yourself in your room idea and would do it ASAP! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 :grouphug: It sounds like you need that mini-vacation in your room to relax. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Χά�ων Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 Been there. I had to get my stress under control. It gets better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerico Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 Hugs. I'm in the same boat. I did okay for about one week after christmas vacation and now i'm back to being tired and overwhelmed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moxie Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 I "liked" your post and that felt odd. I just wanted to add that I am right there with you. My life is no fun right now and that is just how it will be for some time to come. I've got more on my plate than one person can be expected to deal with and that won't change either. Hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 Actually I have been out too much! We are out every single day now. Last night i was supposed to go to a committee meeting. I bailed. I just couldn't take it. The same old stuff rehashed for 2 hours or more yet again. This kind of stuff didn't happen when I was in the workplace. An agenda was adhered to, problems were solved, and we went on with our day. I think I need to hold up in my room ALONE, watch some movies or TV, and tell the kids to fend for themselves. Dawn Oh my yes. This is why I can't volunteer!!! Seriously, it could all be solved in 10 minutes. And yes, I want to run screaming from the house some days. :grouphug: I hope your muse returns soon! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 It's not February yet. Sheesh! ;) <<hugs>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 I don't know where you live, but this time of year can be hard on anybody, especially when it's cold and dreary for days on end! Make sure you're getting enough vitamin D. Can you get away for a weekend? I think your kids are probably old enough that you can pretend you're sick and spend the day in bed with a good book and being served! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanvan Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 I "liked" your post and that felt odd. I just wanted to add that I am right there with you. My life is no fun right now and that is just how it will be for some time to come. I've got more on my plate than one person can be expected to deal with and that won't change either. Hugs. Same here. I liked your post b/c I feel the same. I had the ultimate exhaustion set in yesterday--pretty close to the worst I've ever had. I'm directing from the couch today. I don't know if this will help you or not (toss it if not applicable), but here is what I'm doing... I told both Dc I am not feeling well and that they have to do more around the house today. Besides schoolwork my Dc will be washing all dishes, straightening the house and making lunch & dinner. To deal with school I have Ds choosing one subject at a time and telling me what he's going to do (so I know he's on the right lesson or project), then keeping a log of when he started, when he finished, and what he completed. Then he reports to me and decides which subject he is moving to next. I'm doing things that way b/c I can't handle thinking about more than one thing at a time today and I want to make sure he is keeping up with his work. Dd needs my direction more, but the world is not going to end if she doesn't have a full school day. She's only in 6th grade and is well on her way to developing skills she needs for middle school, so I'm not going to worry about her for now. She's currently cleaning up the kitchen and will report to me for her next assignment, which I think is writing an introduction to her paper about Mark Twain. I need to get over my exhaustion. I am also being more diligent about my vitamin c, d, and b-12, plus multivitamin. I had been getting busy and letting some go. I'm also dealing with Dh starting a new job with much longer hours and a long commute--and it is a high stress environment which he comes home and vents about. He is just not around to do many of the things he once did, so now i have them to deal with on top of all I managed before. I have always been sympathetic to women whose husbands work long hours or are away, but now I really understand. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: To all those who are tired... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LLMom Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 Actually I have been out too much! We are out every single day now. Last night i was supposed to go to a committee meeting. I bailed. I just couldn't take it. The same old stuff rehashed for 2 hours or more yet again. This kind of stuff didn't happen when I was in the workplace. An agenda was adhered to, problems were solved, and we went on with our day. I think I need to hold up in my room ALONE, watch some movies or TV, and tell the kids to fend for themselves. Dawn Dawn, Are you an introvert? If so, I think that makes it so much harder. I am an introvert and must get time alone with quiet! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 I'm tired, never got caught up on rest over break. I'm frustrated with some of the situations I'm in through no fault of my own. I'm ticked about them in fact. I like homeschooling and it's irritating that the last few years, what I feel are the most vital ones, are now getting diluted because of those situations. It's not fair to him (ds), so I overextend myself. He knows life isn't fair, he gets that, but I don't want that to be the theme of his last few years of high school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 I can totally relate. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunnyDays Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 I "liked" your post and that felt odd. I just wanted to add that I am right there with you. My life is no fun right now and that is just how it will be for some time to come. I've got more on my plate than one person can be expected to deal with and that won't change either. Hugs. :iagree: Not so much "I like what you said" as "Sister, I'm singing the same blues!!" We're currently deciding how/when/where to return DS to school... it was never the plan to homeschool all the way through for us. Part of me says, I don't want that, I like having him here with me. The rest of me says, please let's just get through the rest of this school year and move on!! I know with me I'm having a bit of an identity crisis... who *am* I outside of wife, mom, and homeschooler? I don't know what I want to be when I grow up, and I think I'd actually like to figure it out. Could that be part of the issue? Hugs to you, I hope you're able to sort some things out! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted January 14, 2014 Author Share Posted January 14, 2014 I am actually an extrovert! I preferred working because I got to have an outlet with other humans. The problem for me right now is that it is the same small homeschool group all the time and I need to expand my relationships! Dawn Dawn, Are you an introvert? If so, I think that makes it so much harder. I am an introvert and must get time alone with quiet! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Sorry things aren't going so well right now, Dawn. :( I hope you feel better soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessMommy Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 Actually I have been out too much! We are out every single day now. Last night i was supposed to go to a committee meeting. I bailed. I just couldn't take it. The same old stuff rehashed for 2 hours or more yet again. This kind of stuff didn't happen when I was in the workplace. An agenda was adhered to, problems were solved, and we went on with our day. I think I need to hold up in my room ALONE, watch some movies or TV, and tell the kids to fend for themselves. Dawn I can relate. I don't do well if I'm too busy...especially busy outside the house. The older I get the more of a homebody I become. I'm tired too and I'm not even a homeschooler anymore, but it's been a very stressful couple of days. I can take it's toll. I hope you get some time to yourself. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 :grouphug: BTDT. Actually, kind of there right now. In a funk. Not so much on the "jobs", but I think the lack of ..... Something. Adult interaction? Creativity? Sense of accomplishment? I'm not exactly sure what is lacking, just that something is. So it does make the rest of the stuff more of a slog to drag myself through every day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted January 15, 2014 Author Share Posted January 15, 2014 Thankfully DH is responding well. Ok, well, almost well. He is seeing I am a mess and something has GOT to change. We are in discussion mode as to exactly what. Part of me would really like to return to work. Part of me would really, really like to move back to California. I just don't think it is fair to the kids right now to do either, perhaps in a couple of years when they have finished some things I feel are important (finishing Eagle with their current troop, getting through most of high school for the older two, etc…) For now, he and I have sat down with the kids and had a big talk about their attitudes, their need to help around here without complaining, and the fact that Mom is not their slave. They can make their own breakfast and lunch, and they can clean it up. They can look at the board and see what their assignments are and check it off as they go. No more, "I didn't know I was supposed to do that." Um, you didn't know that you had to do that subject today? We do it EVERY day……..come here and let me explain it to you a little more clearly son! The meeting I didn't attend? My civil disobedience seems to have stirred some action…….YEAH! I have told the powers that be why I did not go and some action is finally being taken. I am not the only reason things are moving, but I feel that what I did was necessary. Now, in me not attending the meeting and driving away, DH didn't realize my youngest was even there and drove all the way home at 10:30 without him! OOPS. He had to drive all the way back up there (30 min. each way) to get him at 11pm. THAT got Dh's attention too. Things have GOT to change. We are working on some other things as well. I won't go in to all our ideas, but we are working on refining them. I am starting to feel a bit better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanvan Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 Thankfully DH is responding well. Ok, well, almost well. He is seeing I am a mess and something has GOT to change. We are in discussion mode as to exactly what. Part of me would really like to return to work. Part of me would really, really like to move back to California. I just don't think it is fair to the kids right now to do either, perhaps in a couple of years when they have finished some things I feel are important (finishing Eagle with their current troop, getting through most of high school for the older two, etc…) For now, he and I have sat down with the kids and had a big talk about their attitudes, their need to help around here without complaining, and the fact that Mom is not their slave. They can make their own breakfast and lunch, and they can clean it up. They can look at the board and see what their assignments are and check it off as they go. No more, "I didn't know I was supposed to do that." Um, you didn't know that you had to do that subject today? We do it EVERY day……..come here and let me explain it to you a little more clearly son! The meeting I didn't attend? My civil disobedience seems to have stirred some action…….YEAH! I have told the powers that be why I did not go and some action is finally being taken. I am not the only reason things are moving, but I feel that what I did was necessary. Now, in me not attending the meeting and driving away, DH didn't realize my youngest was even there and drove all the way home at 10:30 without him! OOPS. He had to drive all the way back up there (30 min. each way) to get him at 11pm. THAT got Dh's attention too. Things have GOT to change. We are working on some other things as well. I won't go in to all our ideas, but we are working on refining them. I am starting to feel a bit better. If they might help someone, I'm sure we'd all like to hear your ideas. Good for you for making a change. I'm right there with you. My biggest problem is that it really does take me following through and checking up all the time to make sure the changes stick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Mousie Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 I am starting to feel a bit better. Hooray for progress! :hurray: I hope the changes stick and the discussions continue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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