Moxie Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Is this how it had to be? Is a clean house the cost of great school days?? I'm not being snarky. Is this the reality I need to embrace? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2scouts Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Yes, that's how it works here. Also, notice I'm now on TWTM instead of cleaning up the mess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moxie Posted August 20, 2013 Author Share Posted August 20, 2013 Yes, that's how it works here. Also, notice I'm now on TWTM instead of cleaning up the mess. Yeah. That's also a problem around here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VinNY Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Yes at my house. The scenario is usually: 1. good school day, dinner made, messy house 2. good school day, no dinner (take-out or cereal and waffles), tidy house 3. no schooling, dinner made, clean house. Sickness/babies..aim for getting laundry done:) After 17 years of this I am content with the reality. It'll get done but not all at the same time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freesia Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Yep, same here! It's the worst the first week of school. Last week, our house was tidy. This week, a stuff bomb exploded. It gets better bc I learn to juggle again and I remember to have periodic 5 minute clean up times. But a great homeschooling day usually means a crazy looking house around here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Yes at my house. The scenario is usually: 1. good school day, dinner made, messy house 2. good school day, no dinner (take-out or cereal and waffles), tidy house 3. no schooling, dinner made, clean house. Sickness/babies..aim for getting laundry done:) After 17 years of this I am content with the reality. It'll get done but not all at the same time. Yep. You get to pick 2 out of 3. I would love to have a good school day every day, so I try to alternate decent dinner/tidy house. I do keep unhealthful processed foods in the freezer for days like this. Tonight? Frozen "buffalo bites" chicken on green salad with blue cheese dressing. Not horrible, but not ideal. And it's quick and doesn't generate lots of dirty dishes. I could even put it on paper plates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 I have concluded that very few homeschooling moms do it all. There simply are not enough hours in the day. Most moms seem to give something up, somewhere. Typically, one of the following seems to be true. -They only have 1 or 2 children (and no very small ones). -Their DHs are home a lot, or they have relatives nearby who help a lot. -They don't clean much. -They don't cook much. -They use very non-teacher-intensive educational materials. I have five kids, three of whom are under the age of five, and my DH works very long hours. I have great parents and ILs, but they all live far away. Because of budget and health concerns, I cook a lot. Because it works better for our budget and for our children, I use a lot of educational materials that require a lot of effort from me. Guess what I don't do much of? Yep, cleaning is last priority on my list. I'm not doing any housework right now, since I have a newborn, but my general goal is about an hour after breakfast to do dishes, swap laundry, vacuum/sweep, wipe bathrooms. Then an hour or so in the afternoon while I'm making dinner, where I'm folding laundry for the kids to put away, and the kids are tidying the house. I assign a room or two for each kid to pick up, and that's their job. I also try to tidy my school desk and the kids' work areas and get the work laid out for the next day. If the deep cleaning doesn't get done, so be it. Be gentle to yourself, mama. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soror Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Lol, yes it is easy to do 2 things well but it takes great balance and organization to get it all done well. My cooking has not been too great here as of late. The problem is that I want to cook fancier dishes but need to accept the reality that for my sanity I need to stick w/ basic home-made meals. So, supper has been late b/c I keep hoping for time and energy to cook something really nice but then end up giving up and just cooking something fast :) I just told myself this morning that I need to go back on a basic menu and shelve the idea of fancy meals until the baby is bigger. My house is staying relatively clean but that is due to getting up early and a fairly good routine, alongside perpetual decluttering. I have my school materials organized better this year and I have noticed(7 wks into the year) that it has been much easier to keep our school material organized and in their proper place when not in use. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T'smom Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Yes at my house. The scenario is usually: 1. good school day, dinner made, messy house 2. good school day, no dinner (take-out or cereal and waffles), tidy house 3. no schooling, dinner made, clean house. Sickness/babies..aim for getting laundry done:) After 17 years of this I am content with the reality. It'll get done but not all at the same time. I have thought this sooo many times! Except that I feel like I can only do 1 1/2... One thing done well, one thing done halfway and one thing not at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sobeknofret Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 That's how it works for me as well. Today was a shorter day because we're still warming up, so we schooled and I had time to pick up the house a bit, but we're having leftovers. Tomorrow is science day, and we'll be doing a lab, so tomorrow the house will be a pit and I'll probably be able to make dinner. I can do two of three but not all three in the same day unless something extraordinary happens! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenbrdsly Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 I hear you! I wrote something about this last year, but I like to think of Afterschooling, parenting, and house cleaning in terms of The Brady Bunch. I can be Carol Brady or Alice, but I can't be both women at the same time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JumpyTheFrog Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 I'm glad it's not just me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kim in Appalachia Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Yes. It is how it works. Think of it this way. You are working a full time job. And worse, that job is in your house. So all of you are home all day, making a mess, but you are working so you can't tend to it. The house will suffer. This year I'm trying a little bit of the fly lady thing. I downloaded the app to my phone, and I try to do the project of the day, as well as a load of wash, and a little (very little!) general upkeep. But really, my house is not very clean. I did clean out a deep cabinet today, but that was only because in the course of a science activity I discovered that a gallon jug of water (never opened) had leaked (!) all over on my shelf. I had a lot of clean up. But the shelf is now clean. :tongue_smilie: Embrace it. It really isn't for that long of a time. It does go by quickly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Critterfixer Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 I'd say no, but you'd have to define clean and tidy as just not a state of total mess. Right now, I'm in total mess mode. School is going well, and I'm keeping up with chores, but my housekeeping time is gone, because I've been babysitting my father's bee-hives. It's a half-hour out there, and about an hour to an hour and a half of work there, then a half-hour back home. Last week I was helping out with the cousins that came to spend about a week with my MIL. So, not much housework going down here. But it's OK. It won't be that way next week. I'd cut yourself a good bit of slack, especially if this is your first week back to school after a layoff. It takes time for everyone to get into the rhythm of things, and you will find the rhythm that works for you, too. Even if you have to change your definition of clean and tidy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxbridgeacademy Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 For me as long as the kitchen is clean, so I can cook, and there is clean laundry (usually in the dryer) so we can dress, I'm pretty happy with just a good school day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hypatia. Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 I've had 2 head-bashing days, a messy house, a gigantic pile of laundry, and kids whose brains turned to mush while on a month long road trip. I'm spending the evening with 2 buck chuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ameena Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 We haven't even started yet and my house is a pit. It's hard when you're a single mom trying to bring in income, homeschool, and take care of the house. Normally taking care of the house comes in last. I'm trying to make a big push this week before we start back to school to get the house clean. I've also moved out schooling center into the dining room which is right off the kitchen & laundry room - hopefully I can work on meals/laundry/cleaning while dd does independent work at the table. I'm close enough to keep her on task, but still get stuff done hopefully. But I will say kids surprise you sometimes & help out - my 6yo dd who is allergic to work surprised me yesterday when she woke up early & put away all the clean dishes from the dishwasher on her own before I got up :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Not here, it isn't! No one eats until the house is picked up each night. My dh cleans the bathrooms and mops the floors every weekend. Laundry is tossed in and rotated by the Laundry Guy--Oldest Son-- as needed. Kitchen is Son 2's domain. It gets cleaned after dinner or he loses his iTouch the next day. Little kids pick up own things, empty dishwasher, fold towels, and general helping. I was bound and determined when we started that I was not going to have a messy house. It also helps that I am a rather organized person by nature, a bit of a minimalist, and very anti-clutter. If it has no purpose, out it goes. The kids have few toys and enough clothes for a week. Everything has a place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea_lpz Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 I can't do housework while kids do school with what we do since it's teacher intense. This helps: #1: make sure house is picked up the night before, especially the kitchen #2: give the kids some morning chores and be able to get themselves ready before breakfast so that buys you about a half hour or so to do a couple chores ( I make my bed, and switch a laundry load over, make coffee and breakfast; kids dress themselves, brush their teeth, make their beds & take care of pets-ie. food, let dog out, scoop cat litter) #3: have an afternoon clean up time where everyone helps tidy up clutter #4: after dinner, see #1, discuss your full time job and dh's need to help, get the kitchen clean, house tidied, kids bathed, and laundry put away and a new load going # 5: House gets a thorough cleaning over the weekend where everyone helps (kids and dh). If everyone really cleans it's done in 2 hours. Not bad! #6: grocery shop over weekend- starting the week with a full fridge and pantry saves time and stress! No quick trips to the store. I make weekly dinner menu so I don't have to guess what we'll be having. I have a general idea for breakfast, lunch, and snack staples so that those items are always replenished. I also clean out the fridge while I make my list. DH can help by either doing something with the kids while you shop or coming along to help (but isn't always helpful). Lately, dh does library story time and picks up holds, returns books we've used and picks books and movies for the kids for fun while I shop at the store and then we meet up at Farmers Market and go home and helps me put stuff away. Also don't forget that even little kids can help put groceries away. #7: try to spend some time prepping for week Sunday evening #5-7 cut into our weekend a bit but can easily be done in two mornings leaving the mid day on free or in one day leaving a whole day free plus probably still a large part of an afternoon and evening. This really makes a difference. #8: embrace the chaos. Your home will probably not be as clean or organized as you like most of the week but that's ok. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowfall Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Um, I just realized that, for some reason, I read Ameena's reply and was thinking it was the OP replying on her thread, so I posted a comment about her being a single mom and how hard that is. So now I'm deleting it because I realize that's totally stupid, since Ameena is not the OP and I have no idea if the OP is actually a single mom. My apologies to all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heidi Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Having a messy house is not an option here (Dh), but not making meals is.. so that is what usually goes around here (sandwiches, anyone?). I try to make big meals when I do cook so we can have leftovers for a few days. But in all honesty, I could totally do it all if I prioritized my time. I waste a lot of time on the internet :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mystie Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Doing school year-round with 5-6 weeks on and a week off has helped us. During the school weeks things devolve, but a day devoted to decluttering and cleaning during a break week helps restore order. It helps even while the house is a mess to know that a time is coming when I will deal with the stuff -- I don't have to feel guilty for not doing it NOW. Last year we schooled 4 days a week and used Monday for errands and housecleaning (because the house always gets messy on the weekends, even if we spend Friday afternoon or Saturday morning cleaning). This year after looking at our goals and plans, I realized we'd have to go to 5 days a week, and I still haven't figured out our housekeeping groove. My husband does the dinner dishes and if he notices the clean laundry, he'll help fold and put away. And the kids have morning chores before we start school and do a main-level tidy every afternoon before dinner and they have to clean their room before they can go play with friends or play the computer. So, the main tidying and cleaning gets done; things just start collecting in the hot spots and places like my desk and the master bathroom get fairly embarrassing. I have a plan for how it all gets addressed adequately, and it works on paper, but so far hasn't worked in reality. Part of that is that it takes time to find a rhythm, and it's more important to establish the school rhythm right now. Once that's going more routinely, then adding in little bits of housekeeping will be easier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lexi Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Yes! I cannot have both. I either have a great school day or a picked up house. I'm hopeful that I'll find a little better balance when my kids are older. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angelmama1209 Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 yep. here, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PentecostalMom Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Here, we have breakfast, then morning chores, then school, the daily chores, then more school if we didn't get finished, then evening chores. Somewhere in there are breaks and playtime, but I cannot live in a horrid mess so we tidy up daily. I have found that by doing it in little chunks it gets done and breaks up the monotony of "doing school". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MommaOfalotta Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Yes at my house. The scenario is usually: 1. good school day, dinner made, messy house 2. good school day, no dinner (take-out or cereal and waffles), tidy house 3. no schooling, dinner made, clean house. Sickness/babies..aim for getting laundry done:) Can I just steal this, print it and hang it on my refridgerator!??!? So that there are no ridiculous expectations (from dh or myself... or people visiting??) :) This thread just reduced my stress/guilt by 50%. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Having a messy house is not an option here (Dh), but not making meals is.. so that is what usually goes around here (sandwiches, anyone?). I try to make big meals when I do cook so we can have leftovers for a few days. But in all honesty, I could totally do it all if I prioritized my time. I waste a lot of time on the internet :( This is an important point -- knowing what matters to you and your family. Of course, my husband would prefer clean house AND nice dinner, but given the choice, he'd rather have dinner than sparkling clean house. Neither is right or wrong, but one speaks to my particular DH more, and one speaks to someone else's DH more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 I have concluded that very few homeschooling moms do it all. There simply are not enough hours in the day. Most moms seem to give something up, somewhere. Typically, one of the following seems to be true. -They only have 1 or 2 children (and no very small ones). -Their DHs are home a lot, or they have relatives nearby who help a lot. -They don't clean much. -They don't cook much. -They use very non-teacher-intensive educational materials. I only have 2 kids, so I guess I should have my act together. :svengo: Well, let's just say we have pretty good school days most of the time and leave it at that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom0012 Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Yes, it is hard to balance everything. We started this week and everything is taking so much longer than it is supposed to, which is what always happens. And then next week, all the activities kick in and my life will consist of either doing school with my kids or driving them somewhere. I have resolved that my dd is going to empty the dishwasher first thing in the morning, so everyone can get their dishes in the dishwasher and I will run it every night. I have also resolved to do one load of laundry a day. I only have 2 kids and they can pick up after themselves pretty well with a reminder here and there, so I'm hoping to pull things together on the weekends if I can get everyone to pitch in for a couple of hours. I feel so much better when the house is in decent order. Doesn't need to be perfect. Just not filthy and cluttered. The one other thing that would really help me is to finish working on my 2-week meal plan. I have got to get that done and force myself to go grocery shopping while the kids are in their activities. For those of you who are moms of many, I have no idea how you do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alicai Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 This thread comforts me. We had a great first week of school and I was amazed that I successfully juggled and even made dinner most nights (!). However, the house was a sty. This wouldn't bother me so much if only it didn't bother me so much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freeindeed Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 My house is good enough. That's all I aim for right now. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
My3girls Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 I work full time and homeschool 3 kiddos. Dh works out of town all week so he's only home on the weekends. Kids all have daily chores; I keep the floors swept, do a load of laundry every day, and shop/run errands on the weekends; dh has a honey-do list on the weekends. I wouldn't be horribly embarrassed by drop in company. Of course, I would love it to be more organized and better decorated, but I have kids. They take my time and money. As for dinner, it's grab and go during the week. I cook a nicer dinner Friday- Sunday when dh is home. The kids tend to just whine and complain about good dinners anyway. I remember a time when I made awesome dinners 6 nights a weeks, but that was back when kids were strapped into highchairs or boosters and wanted to eat whatever was on my plate. Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mystie Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 I only have 2 kids, so I guess I should have my act together. :svengo: Well, let's just say we have pretty good school days most of the time and leave it at that. Yours still count as small ones, don't worry. :) You totally still get the excuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted August 22, 2013 Share Posted August 22, 2013 I do a ton of crockpot cooking, easy to throw in on their lunch break, and usually make enough for leftovers. So we at least get fed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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