Stupid semantics and the planning of menus

[Ginevra]

So, I was having a temper tantrum, swearing and fussing that I am sick. to. death. of coming up with meal ideas; I'm tapped out, I'm in a rut, I'm hitting a wall, I don't know what to make. So, dh, level-headed man that he is, told me to calm down, sat down with me and, declaring it's super-simple and there's nothing to get all worked up about, offered to write up menu plans for a few weeks. This was looking good, but I warned him, "It's not as simple as you think, because I can't eat dairy anymore, and you have to plan for the nights I'm not home or the kids are going places." Fine, he says. No problem.

 

He starts flipping through a cookbook. It takes him about ten minutes to settle on Salisbury Steak for Monday and then says he will grill something on Tuesday. Then he "brilliantly" labels Wed as "left-over night." Okay - I'll let that slide; we do often have a leftover night and Wednesdays are everybody-going-in-twelve-directions night. He decides Thur will be another "Dad grills" night. Okay; not complaining, but so far, he's only actually planned one meal. But whatever; I have class Thursday nights, so if he says he'll grill, tear it up, baby.

 

For Friday, he thinks he'll bring home fish from a gourmet grocery store he passes on the way home. (This was the Friday that just passed.) He got sucked in to buying stuffed pork chops instead, but I nixed having them Friday because it wasn't working with the schedule. I made pizza on Friday and we had the chops last night. Anyway, back to the menu. He planned fish for Friday. Then, coming up with nothing, he labels Saturday as "Mom's Choice" and Sunday as "Dad's Choice." I point out that this is semantically absurd; every night is "Mom's Choice." I don't want to have to keep coming up with the "choice." That is the entire reason I was cracking up to begin with. Unless "Mom's Choice" involves the restaurant up the road, this "menu" item is totally pointless.

 

Despite my objections, he kept "Mom's Choice" on there. So, since he made the pork yesterday, when it was supposed to be "Mom's Choice," I'm calling today restaurant night. Only he's refusing. :glare: He's been gone all day and he doesn't want to go out anywhere. So, I haven't decided whether I'm going to fold, make spaghetti, and ignore the poor planning that landed us here, or up the ante and call Big Chef for Chinese.

 

"Mom's Choice," my eye. :glare:

[Belacqua]

That's sort of like offering to take over the filing then sticking everything into one big folder marked "miscellaneous." :)

 

If it were me, Mom's Choice would be all the stuff I like and nobody else does (tofu scramble with chicken livers comes to mind...).

 

So I vote call for Chinese.

[ChrisB]

I'd do take out. Does that Chinese place have to go?

[Guest]

That's sort of like offering to take over the filing then sticking everything into one big folder marked "miscellaneous." :)

 

If it were me, Mom's Choice would be all the stuff I like and nobody else does (tofu scramble with chicken livers comes to mind...).

 

So I vote call for Chinese.

 

Ha! Good analogy!

 

I'd do take out. Does that Chinese place have to go?

 

Yep. Whatever I call to order, it will be "ready ten minute." :laugh:

[Mrs Mungo]

That's sort of like offering to take over the filing then sticking everything into one big folder marked "miscellaneous." :)

 

If it were me, Mom's Choice would be all the stuff I like and nobody else does (tofu scramble with chicken livers comes to mind...).

 

So I vote call for Chinese.

 

 

I totally agree on all counts.

[Mrs Mungo]

My menu has breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner for 6 days a week. That is what he needs to do, if this is his chore now.

 

How about make a simple dinner rotation like:

Monday: pasta night (might include lasagna, spaghetti, pasta with peas and bacon, baked ravioli, fettucine, eggplant, etc)

Tuesday: Asian (stir fry, egg rolls, pot stickers, shrimp, etc)Wednesday: crockpot would be a good choice since it's a busy night, it can stay on warm as people come and go (meatballs, roast, BBQ chicken, pulled pork, chili, white bean chicken chili, etc)

Thursday: Grill (salmon, chicken, steaks, burgers, brats, etc)

Friday: Pizza

Saturday: Mexican (might include tacos, enchiladas, chile relleno casserole, taco salad, tostones with rice and beans, etc)

Sunday: Take out/Eat out

[TexasRachel]

Now have him plan next week's. And the following week. Or the entire month of December which should be scary if your December is as busy as mine. But tell him he can't repeat meals. He has to come up with sides. And any and all "mom's choice" involves a restaurant. Then see if he still thinks its easy have him start on the other meal times.

[Robin M]

My 2 cents. If it's mom's choice and mom doesn't feel like cooking, then take out it is. He doesn't get to veto it since it is your decision. Another vote for chinese food for tonight. Check out the local restaurant deliveries. We have a thing call Food to You and most of the major restaurants are included. You order online and it's delivered. See if you have something similar in your area.

[Guest]

Well, I caved and made spaghetti. I even put together a fresh salad to go along. I'm way too agreeable.

[Giraffe]

Well, I caved and made spaghetti. I even put together a fresh salad to go along. I'm way too agreeable.

 

Yes, you are. I would have "chosen" Chinese.

[Live2Ride]

Well, I caved and made spaghetti. I even put together a fresh salad to go along. I'm way too agreeable.

 

Girl ya did yourself in, lol. I'd have ordered take out since it was 'my choice', :laugh:

[Farrar]

If it was really my choice, I'd make it foraging night. Go find your own food.

 

I'm also zapped on meal planning. We had meatballs, salad and rice tonight and everyone hated it. Gr.

[Audrey]

I'm sorry. That would drive me nuts, too. I have a similar problem with my dh, who complains about lunches always being so similar (yes, it's a lot of soup, salad or sandwich). I had told him he could take over lunches then. That lasted about 2 weeks and suddenly he was out of brilliant ideas.

 

As it is, I now just tell them, "this is the meal. You want something else? You make it yourself."

[KungFuPanda]

All SORTS of things are simple and easy until you attempt them yourself. You'll have to tell us when he gives up entirely.

[74Heaven]

And any and all "mom's choice" involves a restaurant. Then see if he still thinks its easy have him start on the other meal times.

 

yes!

[Impish]

Now I want Chinese. *pout*

 

I can't imagine Wolf planning a menu. I ask the man to choose btwn 2 options, and he gets the deer-in-the-headlights look and says, "Whatever you want to make!"

 

Gah.

[KungFuPanda]

All SORTS of things are simple and easy until you attempt them yourself. You'll have to tell us when he gives up entirely.

[fraidycat]

Ah, food. My nemesis. I am seriously considering making only seven meals, the same seven meals, week in and week out from now and for the foreseeable future. Monday - spaghetti, Tuesday-tacos, etc. I will make enough for supper one night, and lunch the next day. Then the next night I'll cook enough for supper and lunch, etc. If someone doesn't like what is cooked, there will be bread, peanut butter, apples, and celery available for them to help themselves. Man grocery shopping and meal prep/planning would be SO much easier, and NO WHINING allowed. If you don't like what is cooked, you get the peanut butter out. End of story. If you eat peanut butter sandwiches and apples slices 14 meals/week, then so be it. I am so D.O.N.E. with the food battles that now we pretty much live on boxed freezer food, McDonald's, Dominoes, etc. PB sandwiches can't be worse than that as far as nutrition goes.

[idnib]

My DH is pretty good about making dinner a few nights in a row but would have problems figuring out a whole month, for sure! :grouphug:

 

Our go-to dish for when we're very lazy:

 

Automatically add to any shopping list sausages, jar of pasta sauce, and carrots. These all keep really well. Sausages can be frozen and if you forget to defrost just throw them in whole and cut after they're hot if you need to.

 

 

Slice up a pack of pre-cooked sausages and add to skillet. (We use 5 GF chicken links equal to 1 lb, and slice them all together to save time.)

Dump a jar of tomato-based pasta sauce over sausages

Cut carrot sticks and set table while waiting for sausages and sauce to heat

 

2 veggies and a protein, gluten and dairy free, in less than 10 minutes.

 

If we have more time we saute onions and mushrooms too, or add celery or diced carrots.

 

It's like a pasta sauce w/o the pasta, with extra veggies if you want.

 

Add cheese on top if you can have dairy.

 

You can also brown ground beef or turkey but it takes longer.

[MAIMOM]

I vote for a DD 15 "Choice" night...let her pick the menu and make it. Also a DD 12 "Choice" night. My kids seem to have a favorite meal that they each make so we eat that regularly but hey, they made it and I did not. Plus, they like it so no complaining.

 

They are good at making tacos, spaghetti, chicken and rice (DD11 this is her favorite to make,) soup, and salmon and salad night. They have been known to make something we do not particularly care for....like DD when she was 10 loved to make Tuna Mac N Cheese.....I just would not have that available or limit is to once a month. Oh, they also make Tuna Melts with veggies and dip on the side.

 

I figure this way I am also teaching them easy meals they can make when they are on their own. Last night the 3 kids pitched in after youth group and made frito pie with hot dogs and mac n cheese....they were so proud and DH loved it too. I was the one complaining because I do not like hot dogs...hahahhaa

[nmoira]

I hate meal planning. I really hate figuring out sides once I've finally chosen an entree that appeals. I hate making shopping lists. Hate it all.

 

I was totally bogged down in menu planning (and accommodating a picky eater... it's a texture thing), and I ended up subscribing to a menu-planning service (Fresh 20). Most of the time I take the menu as-is, but occasionally I substitute from their archives -- sometimes a single meal, sometimes an entire week. We're eating a greater variety of foods and dishes and there have been few complaints. Sometimes I add a salad (prewashed bag of greens with a quick homemade dressing and maybe something else I have on hand), but that's it. The texture-challenged child gets fed well/proper :tongue_smilie: the rest of the day and has a limited number of choices she can substitute for that night's dinner if she chooses.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I'm glad we're not the only family in meal-planning hell!

 

DH does not believe in food price inflation. He thinks I've lost my shopping skills. (17 years, people. I have been in charge of food for 17 years. Up until 2010 I was the most frugal little wifey in the world and he was sooooo proud of me for being able to scratch a living on a rock. The diet Has Not Changed but I've lost my skills because we can't afford it now?? In addition to the inflation problem, we also have three boys who recently became man-sized and are still growing. No, I can't feed them as cheaply as when they were pre-adolescent.)

 

Anyway, he spent a lovely afternoon yesterday with the cookbook and the checklists, working on a meal plan that will be more frugal. I'm just smiling and nodding (so I don't divorce him; actually I'm quite angry). If he wants a new hobby, grocery shopping and cooking can be just transformative. Good for him. But he won't be able to do it cheaper, so I'm sure it will be my job again within two weeks.

 

And I sound like I love my homemaking tasks and am defensive about sharing them. Nope, that's not it. If Mrs. Brady's Alice walked in here today and offered to do 100% of the cooking and cleaning for fifty cents a week and her own room, as long as she could run the household her own way, I would sign her up and start building her room. I'm not picky about any of it and I'm tired of doing it. But for goodness sakes, don't come in here telling me I'm doing it wrong when I am doing it and have been doing it for 17 years. It's not my fault meat is $3/lb and apples are just as high.

[Mrs Mungo]

Tibbie, my dh waxed on about his $50/week college budget, until I pointed out:

 

1. That was 20 years ago.

2. We eat far better than that.

3. $50 x 5 = less than I spend/week

 

He finally got it.

[Soror]

This thread is too funny. Dh always tells me to make whatever I want for supper, he thinks that is helpful. I can only imagine if dh planned for a month! We'd go broke!

[justLisa]

I am currently in a state of hating food. I don't want to shop, buy it, sort it, cook it or eat it.

[Guest]

I vote for a DD 15 "Choice" night...let her pick the menu and make it. Also a DD 12 "Choice" night. My kids seem to have a favorite meal that they each make so we eat that regularly but hey, they made it and I did not. Plus, they like it so no complaining.

 

They are good at making tacos, spaghetti, chicken and rice (DD11 this is her favorite to make,) soup, and salmon and salad night. They have been known to make something we do not particularly care for....like DD when she was 10 loved to make Tuna Mac N Cheese.....I just would not have that available or limit is to once a month. Oh, they also make Tuna Melts with veggies and dip on the side.

 

I figure this way I am also teaching them easy meals they can make when they are on their own. Last night the 3 kids pitched in after youth group and made frito pie with hot dogs and mac n cheese....they were so proud and DH loved it too. I was the one complaining because I do not like hot dogs...hahahhaa

 

 

You're right, and I have done that a lot in the past. DD is quite a good cook because she used to do one night a week and I have worked on bringing ds up to speed, too. We fell of the wagon when dd started going to B&M high school; it's too much to expect her to make a dinner with the way her schedule is now. I have had her make dinner some weekends, and also ds, who is 13 now. Really should get back to that. I love for them to be competent in making dinner.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Tibbie, my dh waxed on about his $50/week college budget, until I pointed out:

 

1. That was 20 years ago.

2. We eat far better than that.

3. $50 x 5 = less than I spend/week

 

He finally got it.

 

I'll be contacting you later to give you our phone number, if you think your DH is sympathetic to the point of becoming evangelical about this. My DH needs a witness.

 

We had that moment when DH talked about his unhappy lunch cycle (he goes from leftovers, to odds-and-ends from the produce department, to value menus at fast food, to workplace cafeterias). He said he only stays with one approach until it starts feeling too expensive, and then he switches to something else. But then he doesn't want to take the leftovers because that's ready and easy (and cheap) for the boys at home. He said, "No matter what I try to do, it feels too expensive," and I said, "YES. That is what I'm going through, only x5 when you're not here and x6 when you are. And you know ds#2 eats enough for two people and has to."

 

For a moment the light went on, and then he was back to crafting his frugal menu.

[Mrs Mungo]

Tibbie, how about showing him the Hillbilly Housewife website? It shows how her $45 emergency menu designed to feed 4-6 in 2006 inflated to $70 in 2009.

[fraidycat]

I am currently in a state of hating food. I don't want to shop, buy it, sort it, cook it or eat it.

 

I am SO glad that I'm not alone. This is me, exactly. Hence, my 7 meals idea. I might be able to handle that without falling off the wagon and going back to microwave burritos and canned soup. Might. The hatred is pretty deep seated now.

[fairfarmhand]

I'm glad we're not the only family in meal-planning hell!

 

DH does not believe in food price inflation. He thinks I've lost my shopping skills. (17 years, people. I have been in charge of food for 17 years. Up until 2010 I was the most frugal little wifey in the world and he was sooooo proud of me for being able to scratch a living on a rock. The diet Has Not Changed but I've lost my skills because we can't afford it now?? In addition to the inflation problem, we also have three boys who recently became man-sized and are still growing. No, I can't feed them as cheaply as when they were pre-adolescent.)

 

Anyway, he spent a lovely afternoon yesterday with the cookbook and the checklists, working on a meal plan that will be more frugal. I'm just smiling and nodding (so I don't divorce him; actually I'm quite angry). If he wants a new hobby, grocery shopping and cooking can be just transformative. Good for him. But he won't be able to do it cheaper, so I'm sure it will be my job again within two weeks.

 

And I sound like I love my homemaking tasks and am defensive about sharing them. Nope, that's not it. If Mrs. Brady's Alice walked in here today and offered to do 100% of the cooking and cleaning for fifty cents a week and her own room, as long as she could run the household her own way, I would sign her up and start building her room. I'm not picky about any of it and I'm tired of doing it. But for goodness sakes, don't come in here telling me I'm doing it wrong when I am doing it and have been doing it for 17 years. It's not my fault meat is $3/lb and apples are just as high.

Are you married to my dh????

 

Really, he told me a few weeks back that "You can buy the biggest bonus package of toilet paper for like FOUR dollars!!!!"

 

He stocked the TP shelves at a grocery store when he was 15. THAT WAS 20 YEARS AGO!!!!! The price is like three times that now!

[idnib]

I think we should start complaining they can't fill up the gas tank for $25 anymore. After all, people were paying around $1.40/gallon for gas 20 years ago. :tongue_smilie:

[I.Dup.]

I hate menu planning. Hate it. When I finally spend the time on it and get everything organized, dh *never* wants to eat what I've planned. He always "feels" like something different. So whatever, I give up. If we spend a bit more on food, it's at the price of my sanity I guess.

[Guest]

I'm so glad to know I'm not the only person who gets sick of this task. If only eating wasn't one of those continuous expectations... :nopity: I'd rather clean 12 bathrooms than make one grocery run. I hate that task.

[Rhonda in TX]

I don't care for any type of shopping, but grocery shopping is in a class all by itself. DH grew up with a mother who loves to shop and really catered to them for meals. If FIL wanted something different, she'd cook 2 meals. So, DH really doesn't understand my loathing of this task.

 

I have a friend who has a 3 week rotation of meals. They never change. She's had the same meal plan for years. It really simplifies everything, but I don't think my family would go for it.

[Guest]

I don't care for any type of shopping, but grocery shopping is in a class all by itself. DH grew up with a mother who loves to shop and really catered to them for meals. If FIL wanted something different, she'd cook 2 meals. So, DH really doesn't understand my loathing of this task.

 

I have a friend who has a 3 week rotation of meals. They never change. She's had the same meal plan for years. It really simplifies everything, but I don't think my family would go for it.

 

 

I've heard of doing it this way, but I don't think that's the solution for me, either. I know I would get tired of it. I get tired of the things I usually make as it is, and they aren't falling on the same days. I also utilize certain recipes to work with our schedule, so sometimes, it's a crock-pot meal or grilling. What day(s) of the week we need to use those options changes at least seasonally, if not monthly.

[Belacqua]

 

I'm anti gun, but at this point I think I might like to shoot it.

 

 

That just brings to mind O Brother Where Art Thou and Delmar offering, "Care for some gopher?"

[Ellie]

Ok, so, Mom's Choice could be that you choose for your dh to fix dinner for everyone else while you go out with some friends...

[justLisa]

 

I'm anti gun, but at this point I think I might like to shoot it.

 

 

 

Oh yeah. I am there.

[FriedClams]

A friend has YOYO night - you're on your own. Love it!

 

I use emeals. It's great. They have TONS of menu options - GF, whole food, paleo, vegetarian. It rocks!!