Unbelievable actions of PS 7th graders

[Doran5]

So, I have been a little preoccupied lately and have not had the opportunity to log on until today. Let me tell you about some situations going on at my son's school:

1) A group of 7th graders started a "gang" and called themselves the "Charlie Rape Gang", CRG for short. These children would randomly select other children, boys and girls, and push them into locker, walls, or onto the floor and "hump" them. The leaders of this group, 5 boys, were given 3 days of In School Suspension. No notification of this group was given to parents so we could discuss it with our children. I know a reporter, so I went to her and we got the story in the news and got the attention of all of the parents at the school. Since then, more children have come forward as being victims of this group and the 5 boys have been charged with simple battery. 2 sent to alternative school and the other 3 are awaiting the county's decision as to what their school punishment should be.

What is appauling is that these kids claim it was just a joke. The friends and girlfriends of the boys think that it was funny and parents are overreacting. A girl went around school, the day the boys were in court, and "CRG'd" 2 girls and 2 boys. She was immediately expelled, sent to alternative school, and charged with inappropriate sexual conduct on a minor under the age of 16. The judge ordered a psych eval.

2) New thing now is called "credit carding", I googled it and was mortified. 2 girls were suspended last week for doing this to other girls.

 

I had already made my decision to HS my children next year, but this just drove in the final nail. I have parents tell me that I should not "shelter" my children as they will eventually have to learn to deal with the "real world". WOW! If simulated rape and sexual harassment are normal in their world, I don't even want to be a part of it.

:leaving:

Thanks! I will now get off my soap box!

[Shannon in TN]

Wow. Just, wow. Dd will be in 5th next year, but I'm always looking ahead a year and that would be middle school for us. I'm really having second thoughts about middle school because of things you just mentioned...

 

Yikes :scared: middle school!

[mommaduck]

Yep, I remember "clothes burning" being popular in fourth grade when I came back to the states. After having been sheltered in the Pacific, where people were a bit more conservative, I was in for traumatic culture shock. And the teachers didn't give a flip. I reported a couple of kids for trying to feel me up and the principal laughed at me. After his reaction, I didn't bother to tell my parents.

[3peasinWa]

when I was in middle school, the big thing was to de-pants someone. A group of girls tried to do it to me, but thankfully I had a good belt on. Still, I remember feeling violated & ashamed and they didn't even get my pants down.

[Doran5]

Wow. Just, wow. Dd will be in 5th next year, but I'm always looking ahead a year and that would be middle school for us. I'm really having second thoughts about middle school because of things you just mentioned...

 

Yikes :scared: middle school!

 

We had no problems last year! The problem, I think, is that at that age they are hormonal, emotional, and just want to be liked. So for the kids who have little to no parental involvement, that means a whole lot of followers. My son is not a follower, nor is he really a leader. He has his opinions, like them or don't. He understands that the reason he is there is to learn. If he makes some friends with the same forward thinking goals great! But, no 8th grade at that school. And my daughter will definitely never step foot in there!

[Mrs Mungo]

This was an issue elsewhere too.

 

http://news.yahoo.com/rape-tag-disgusting-schoolyard-game-103100938.html

 

That story was from February, I thought we had discussed it before then too?

 

Yep, I remember "clothes burning" being popular in fourth grade when I came back to the states. After having been sheltered in the Pacific, where people were a bit more conservative, I was in for traumatic culture shock. And the teachers didn't give a flip. I reported a couple of kids for trying to feel me up and the principal laughed at me. After his reaction, I didn't bother to tell my parents.

 

when I was in middle school, the big thing was to de-pants someone. A group of girls tried to do it to me, but thankfully I had a good belt on. Still, I remember feeling violated & ashamed and they didn't even get my pants down.

 

My junior high and middle school had very similar issues. High school was a little better; I think most of the worst offenders had been expelled/sent to alternative school or jail by then.

[TravelingChris]

Wow, just wow. I am 49 and we didn't have such things going on in my schools and my junior high was a mixture of kids from nice areas and not so nice areas. The worse seemed to be inappropriate comments.

 

I also go to tutor in a low income elementary school and I haven't seen anything like this. Most of the kids seem fairly well supervised.

[simka2]

. I have parents tell me that I should not "shelter" my children as they will eventually have to learn to deal with the "real world". WOW! If simulated rape and sexual harassment are normal in their world, I don't even want to be a part of it.

:leaving:

Thanks! I will now get off my soap box!

 

I was one of these parents...in some sense. I am eating quite a bit of crow at the moment. Although, I still think there some decent schools out there, we are not in one of them. It is unfortunate. In our situation I am seeing the teachers and school administration doing whatever they can, but it is not able to stem the tide of what these children bring from home. Breaks my heart. I am glad these kids have a very proactive school administration, but my kids are going into shock. They are very confused and do not understand what is going on with their peers. They want to learn, do well in school...and are getting eaten alive for it.

[TranquilMind]

Doran5: So, I have been a little preoccupied lately and have not had the opportunity to log on until today. Let me tell you about some situations going on at my son's school:

1) A group of 7th graders started a "gang" and called themselves the "Charlie Rape Gang", CRG for short. These children would randomly select other children, boys and girls, and push them into locker, walls, or onto the floor and "hump" them. The leaders of this group, 5 boys, were given 3 days of In School Suspension. No notification of this group was given to parents so we could discuss it with our children. I know a reporter, so I went to her and we got the story in the news and got the attention of all of the parents at the school. Since then, more children have come forward as being victims of this group and the 5 boys have been charged with simple battery. 2 sent to alternative school and the other 3 are awaiting the county's decision as to what their school punishment should be.

 

 

Oh, Lord. God help us. My son is NEVER going to school!

 

My daughter went, and as I explained on another thread, the kids like this are often sent off to the charter/alternative schools! Then they just spread it there.

 

What is appauling is that these kids claim it was just a joke. The friends and girlfriends of the boys think that it was funny and parents are overreacting. A girl went around school, the day the boys were in court, and "CRG'd" 2 girls and 2 boys. She was immediately expelled, sent to alternative school, and charged with inappropriate sexual conduct on a minor under the age of 16. The judge ordered a psych eval.

 

 

This makes me feel ill. Especially the part about being sent off to a new crop of "victims".

 

 

2) New thing now is called "credit carding", I googled it and was mortified. 2 girls were suspended last week for doing this to other girls.

 

 

I'm not even sure I want to look this up. I'm already very upset at what my daughter in a charter high school experiences.

 

I had already made my decision to HS my children next year, but this just drove in the final nail. I have parents tell me that I should not "shelter" my children as they will eventually have to learn to deal with the "real world". WOW! If simulated rape and sexual harassment are normal in their world, I don't even want to be a part of it.

:leaving:

 

 

Yeah.

[Paisley Hedgehog]

nm

[TranquilMind]

I was one of these parents...in some sense. I am eating quite a bit of crow at the moment. Although, I still think there some decent schools out there, we are not in one of them. It is unfortunate. In our situation I am seeing the teachers and school administration doing whatever they can, but it is not able to stem the tide of what these children bring from home. Breaks my heart. I am glad these kids have a very proactive school administration, but my kids are going into shock. They are very confused and do not understand what is going on with their peers. They want to learn, do well in school...and are getting eaten alive for it.

I'm sorry. I feel your pain, believe me.

[NotSoObvious]

The "rape gang" thing is going on in middle schools in Utah, as well. Disgusting.

[Abeille]

I'm sorry. I feel your pain, believe me.

 

So do I. My oldest ds is enrolled in 7th grade at PS this year, and it has been an eye opener. I knew things might be bad, but not this bad. :grouphug:

[NotAVampireLvr]

There was a 7th grader raped in one of our local middle schools last year. I was absolutely horrified. This situation was isolated, but WOW to the "**pe gangs"

[Haiku]

When I was in middle school, a boy who loved to harass the girls asked me if I had ever "stuck anything up my c#nt." I was so shocked I didn't even know what to say. He then produced a tampon and told me he could shove it up there if I wanted to know what it was like.

 

I was 11.

 

I can't even begin to imagine my dd10 dealing with something like that next year.

 

Tara

[DianeW88]

when I was in middle school, the big thing was to de-pants someone. A group of girls tried to do it to me, but thankfully I had a good belt on. Still, I remember feeling violated & ashamed and they didn't even get my pants down.

 

Yep, "pantsing" has always been an issue in schools. My dh said it happened when he was in junior high, and he was born in 1959. Whenever you throw a group of kids in that age group together in an institutional setting....this type of behavior is what results.

 

One more reason my kids have never been, and will never be, in a public school setting.

 

Oh, and for the record (and to all those who are telling you that your kids "need" this kind of experience to be ready for the real world), neither of my home school grads who are currently attending different universities have ever been "pantsed" or had anyone try to hump them in college. Real world my @$$. :glare:

[Mrs Mungo]

Oh, and for the record (and to all those who are telling you that your kids "need" this kind of experience to be ready for the real world), neither of my home school grads who are currently attending different universities have ever been "pantsed" or had anyone try to hump them in college. Real world my @$$. :glare:

 

Exactly! In the real world people get charged with assault and go to jail. Nobody laughs it off. :glare:

[Mommy22alyns]

That is absolutely horrifying. Especially the kids thinking that it's funny and a joke. Do I even want to look up "credit carding"? :eek: These stories make me even more determined to homeschool all the way.

[BatmansWife]

Wow...and you said this is with 7th graders? That's like 12 and 13 year olds! Shocking! I'm glad you'll be homeschooling. If it were me, though, I'd just take them out now.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I found a parent-friendly site with an explanation of credit carding. I hadn't heard of that. If I'd ever heard of this action I'd be thinking s*xual assault, not high school fad.

 

Here it is: http://mpoweredparent.com/blog/2010/01/07/credit-carding-its-not-what-you-think/

[Coffeetime]

I found a parent-friendly site with an explanation of credit carding. I hadn't heard of that. If I'd ever heard of this action I'd be thinking s*xual assault, not high school fad.

 

Here it is: http://mpoweredparent.com/blog/2010/01/07/credit-carding-its-not-what-you-think/

 

:eek: HOW is that not s*xual assault?!?! I never went to public school. My kids have never been in public school. And now I'm even more adamant that they never, ever will. Predator kids, predator teachers.... I'm just .... speechless.

[BatmansWife]

3679575[/font]]I found a parent-friendly site with an explanation of credit carding. I hadn't heard of that. If I'd ever heard of this action I'd be thinking s*xual assault' date=' not high school fad.

 

Here it is: http://mpoweredparent.com/blog/2010/01/07/credit-carding-its-not-what-you-think/[/quote']

 

It must be pretty bad because my SecureIt blocks the site.

[Lilymax]

And to think, just the other day I was feeling so nostalgic for the good experiences of school that I contemplated--for a moment--letting the boys go back to school.

 

Um. No. We're just fine homeschooling, thank you!

[Mommy22alyns]

I found a parent-friendly site with an explanation of credit carding. I hadn't heard of that. If I'd ever heard of this action I'd be thinking s*xual assault, not high school fad.

 

Here it is: http://mpoweredparent.com/blog/2010/01/07/credit-carding-its-not-what-you-think/

 

 

Oh my goodness.

[Cindyg]

My son goes to a church-based enrichment program for homeschoolers. There are 37 kids in his group, which is grades 8-10. They are so sweet, innocent, polite, protected, and educated. A big deal was once the one couple who are "boyfriend and girlfriend" hugged each other briefly. The school administrater quickly told them that was not allowed.

 

We are so, so blessed.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

It must be pretty bad because my SecureIt blocks the site.

 

It did? I'm sorry. K9 let it through on the strictest setting. There are no images or anything raunchy, it seems to be a parent resource site. They do spell out terms, though, instead of asterisk'ing them or using euphemisms. So if your SecureIt blocks topics words, that'll do it.

[clarkacademy]

when I was in middle school, the big thing was to de-pants someone. A group of girls tried to do it to me, but thankfully I had a good belt on. Still, I remember feeling violated & ashamed and they didn't even get my pants down.

 

 

I remember this BIG TIME I had on those baggy pants everyone wore and some boy snagged me. It was that time of the month and I had a pad on and it was HORRIBLE! I actually skipped the rest of the school year and got caught by the police the last day of school.

 

I had to do summer classes and it sucked. Thankfully we moved and I went to a different highschool than everyone else from there.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I try to talk to my kids about these things when they come up, even though my boys don't go to school. Their friends do. Of course, I can't imagine any of their ps friends being in on any of this nonsense, they are all very good kids from nice families. Still, unless we lock up our children, they know teens who are exposed to this stuff. They may encounter it at some non-school activity or event, and they deserve to be prepared.

 

I'm trying to imagine what my 6ft tall, 13yo TKD black belt would do if somebody approached him with these intents in mind. I don't think it would be a joke to him, and I think they'd be on the ground before they could do it. And then he'd be charged with assault, probably. VERY important to talk to our homeschooled kids about these things.

[Impish]

I found a parent-friendly site with an explanation of credit carding. I hadn't heard of that. If I'd ever heard of this action I'd be thinking s*xual assault, not high school fad.

 

Here it is: http://mpoweredparent.com/blog/2010/01/07/credit-carding-its-not-what-you-think/

:eek:

[clarkacademy]

If ANYONE ever touches my daughter like this God help them, I will break their wrists. That is disgusting.

 

 

I found a parent-friendly site with an explanation of credit carding. I hadn't heard of that. If I'd ever heard of this action I'd be thinking s*xual assault, not high school fad.

 

Here it is: http://mpoweredparent.com/blog/2010/01/07/credit-carding-its-not-what-you-think/

[swellmomma]

I found a parent-friendly site with an explanation of credit carding. I hadn't heard of that. If I'd ever heard of this action I'd be thinking s*xual assault, not high school fad.

 

Here it is: http://mpoweredparent.com/blog/2010/01/07/credit-carding-its-not-what-you-think/

 

That's the one I looked up on too. Shocking, and if someone did that to my child I would be livid and calling the police for sexual assault.

[mom2denj]

I just took my dd out of high school. Her choice. She was tired of the "things" going on right inside the classroom. :glare: It really is unbelievable!!

[teachmejoy]

The public middle school in our town just had a couple of kids get in-school suspension for a few days for having oral s*x on the school bus. Another kid was video taping it...

[Haiku]

they are all very good kids from nice families.

 

Even good kids from nice families sometimes succumb to peer pressure and do dumb, cruel things. Group think can be very powerful. There are a lot of wealthy districts where the kids are "good" and from "nice families" and they have the same types of problems as all the other schools.

 

Tara

[Doran5]

The public middle school in our town just had a couple of kids get in-school suspension for a few days for having oral s*x on the school bus. Another kid was video taping it...

 

:eek:

[Venia]

Honestly, this is nothing new. The name of the prank is pretty shocking, but the action is definitely not new (at least to me and those I went to public school with). Let me date myself here and say that my earliest memory of such sexual pranks started in 5th grade...that was 1990/91 (and it was a suburb school district with mixed race and socioeconomics). The dry humping was only one of many including something akin to a "credit card", but from the front.

 

I absolutely hate that this is still going on. You would think with all the districts now having "Zero Tolerance" policies that this type if issue would be rare compared to the suspension/study hall consequences of my era. Guess not. :glare:

[EmilyinND]

I remember the 'pantsing' & also in high school there were some guys who, in the hustle & bustle of changing classes, would slap girls on the butt as they walked by them (while you were standing at your locker with your back turned to the hall). By the time you turned around to see who did it they were lost in the crowd of kids walking in the halls.

[Mommy22alyns]

The public middle school in our town just had a couple of kids get in-school suspension for a few days for having oral s*x on the school bus. Another kid was video taping it...

 

 

Holy crap, it gets worse and worse!

[MedicMom]

A neighbor was telling me about this going on in our local PS, where she teaches fifth grade. I mentioned in the conversation that I plan to homeschool and she was appalled, saying that my kids would be "socially backward" and unable to function as adults in society. Once I recovered from the complete logical disconnect(play acting gang r*pe seems pretty socially dysfunctional to me) I pointed out that both DH and I are homeschool graduates who are functioning rather nicely.

 

But, yeah...that is fifth and sixth grade in my small, rural town.

[Alicia64]

I have parents tell me that I should not "shelter" my children as they will eventually have to learn to deal with the "real world". !

 

That's just a prettied up way of saying, "the world is too much for me to deal with so I do nothing and just let it roll."

 

GREAT that you went to the reporter -- I wish I could shake your hand.

 

Alley

[i.love.lucy]

This breaks my heart. For all those poor kids who are victims of this kind of behavior especially. My dd is so shy and modest I'm pretty sure she would absolutely d.i.e. on the spot if this kind of thing happened to her.:(

[Doran5]

They targeted all the shy quiet kids. They were hoping that no one would speak up. Well, I had my son tell the kids that he knew were victims to tell their parents because they were about to find out about it anyway. I cannot stand a bully! I felt that the principal should have informed us, and she didn't. I contacted the school board, and never heard back from them. So, I went public with it.

I had a couple middle schoolers threatened my son and his friend one summer while they were sitting on my porch. I called the sheriff's office and they sent over 2 deputies. They talked to my son and his friend. Then they went to the boys' houses. They all came back with parents and the deputies had the boys apologize to the kids and to us. The one parent looked mortified, the other, like we were interrupting her plans. It all comes back on parenting!

I would have to take my son down to a shelter and to a PO for sex offenders. That way they truly understand that it is not a joke

[i.love.lucy]

New movie coming out about bullying. March 30th.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Even good kids from nice families sometimes succumb to peer pressure and do dumb, cruel things. Group think can be very powerful. There are a lot of wealthy districts where the kids are "good" and from "nice families" and they have the same types of problems as all the other schools.

 

Tara

 

Sorry, Tara, I can't quite hear you. I have sand in my ears.

 

 

Seriously, that is something I often forget, that the same kids who would never do a thing on their own (and who will look back with remorse and shame) might be carried along in a group. Especially if there's drinking involved. You are right.

 

Edited to add: I mentioned drinking because my own homeschooled teens are most likely to encounter something like this at a non-school event.

Edited March 5, 2012 by Tibbie Dunbar

[QuirkyKidAcademy]

I can see this happening to my child at that age. He is small for his age, pretty quiet in a group, unassuming, not likely to fight back. If he's humiliated, he's not likely to talk to his dad or me about it. He's not in public school - he's on the other side of the wall right now - and I'm heartbroken just thinking about it.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

New movie coming out about bullying. March 30th.

 

Thanks for this link! The film was mentioned on our local news website, because some local parents are trying to get the message out for everyone to watch it. I hadn't heard the details about it, though.

 

Here's a quote from your link that shows the tone of the film:

"The film, which follows the experience of five children whose lives have been forever changed by bullying, isn’t for the faint of heart. Watching it feels like having your chest opened with a can opener then sprinkled with rock salt. The music is haunting, the voices of parents who have lost their children are unspeakably sad, and the language is raw: apparently many kids swear like truck drivers when not in the presence of adults."

 

Awful. I'll probably watch it but I'm not looking forward to it.

[BarbecueMom]

This stuff makes me feel extraordinarily under-sheltered. All of this stuff happened when I was in middle school (mid-90's) and worse. I thought it was typical. Inappropriate, disgusting, humiliating, illegal... but typical.

 

This is part of why we are homeschooling, because it would never occur to me that immature, hormonally charged, undersupervised middle schoolers wouldn't be dry humping people in the halls for laughs.

[Venia]

This stuff makes me feel extraordinarily under-sheltered. All of this stuff happened when I was in middle school (mid-90's) and worse. I thought it was typical. Inappropriate, disgusting, humiliating, illegal... but typical.

 

This is part of why we are homeschooling, because it would never occur to me that immature, hormonally charged, undersupervised middle schoolers wouldn't be dry humping people in the halls for laughs.

 

:iagree:

[Heather in AL]

Yep, I remember "clothes burning" being popular in fourth grade when I came back to the states. After having been sheltered in the Pacific, where people were a bit more conservative, I was in for traumatic culture shock. And the teachers didn't give a flip. I reported a couple of kids for trying to feel me up and the principal laughed at me. After his reaction, I didn't bother to tell my parents.

 

I have never heard of 'clothes burning'. Do I dare google it?

 

when I was in middle school, the big thing was to de-pants someone. A group of girls tried to do it to me, but thankfully I had a good belt on. Still, I remember feeling violated & ashamed and they didn't even get my pants down.

 

I hadn't heard of this, either, until a few years ago.

 

I try to talk to my kids about these things when they come up, even though my boys don't go to school. Their friends do. Of course, I can't imagine any of their ps friends being in on any of this nonsense, they are all very good kids from nice families. Still, unless we lock up our children, they know teens who are exposed to this stuff. They may encounter it at some non-school activity or event, and they deserve to be prepared.

 

I'm trying to imagine what my 6ft tall, 13yo TKD black belt would do if somebody approached him with these intents in mind. I don't think it would be a joke to him, and I think they'd be on the ground before they could do it. And then he'd be charged with assault, probably. VERY important to talk to our homeschooled kids about these things.

 

Regarding the part I bolded in your post~~ I was "credit carded" in middle school at the age of 11 back in 1982. I was mortified and very nearly burst into tears. I was apparently one of the first of a long string of 'victims'. The teachers chose to remain oblivious. The perpetrators were kids from good families, as was I. I think it's the result of hormonal teens with lack of impulse control and not enough supervision. The whole "boys will be boys" thing comes to mind. I can't fathom why *girls* are participating, though. :confused: I think our whole culture has some serious issues.

 

At the same middle school, and later, at two different high schools in two different states, the dry h*mping occurred with great frequency, and it seemed that no one escaped that indignity. One high school was the second best in the city, and the other was the 'cream of the crop' in both academics and wealth for the county... all the doctors' & lawyers' kids went there.

 

All this to say, stuff like this happens across all socioeconomic boundaries.

 

And, sadly, those who defend themselves usually receive a harsher punishment than those who are breaking the rules. I saw it time and time again when I was in school, and later when my own kids were in school. Because of that, most victims don't defend themselves, even verbally.

 

Even good kids from nice families sometimes succumb to peer pressure and do dumb, cruel things. Group think can be very powerful. There are a lot of wealthy districts where the kids are "good" and from "nice families" and they have the same types of problems as all the other schools.

 

Tara

:iagree: See my story above.

 

 

I am soooo glad that my kids are no longer in the jungle of what passes for schools. I feel for all the kids who have been subject to this cr*p.

Edited March 5, 2012 by Moderator
Edited by moderator to remove quote from deleted post

[5forMe]

I'm trying to imagine what my 6ft tall, 13yo TKD black belt would do if somebody approached him with these intents in mind. I don't think it would be a joke to him, and I think they'd be on the ground before they could do it. And then he'd be charged with assault, probably. VERY important to talk to our homeschooled kids about these things.

 

Most certainly (to the high lighted part).