Warning impolite rant inside

[newlifemom]

I am going to let it go, but wanted to vent just a bit. Please tell me that it is rude to bring your dog to a family party, w/o warning the host family who have many allergies [although to be fair not of dogs] but does not own any pets and doesn't particularly like dogs. [They are great for others, just not us] And then without asking bring him into the house.

 

I mean, he was a small dog, one of those poodle mixes, maybe a labradoodle?, well-behaved and wasn't in for very long periods, more of just a stretch b/c he was in the crate the whole time.

 

I would have said yes if I was asked, but honestly, it really peeves me that they did not.

 

I did not say anything, and again the dog was not in for long periods, but still. Plus, they let him off leash in my house without permission. :001_huh:

 

My dh say it is about them setting boundaries and defining our relationship with them, which is rocky at best. IDK, just really bothered me.

 

FTR, I like dogs, as long as they are not mine and don't poop in my yard. :tongue_smilie:

[ConnieB]

Well, if there is a next time that you invite them over you'll want to be sure to caveat it with "and, please we'd appreciate it if you leave Rover at home, thanks so much". If they have the gall to ask why, you can decide how far to go into it, but I'd probably just say "we're not really a dog family and we'd just prefer not to have him here". If they still push...I'd say "maybe we should reschedule our visit for another time....I'll get back to you.".

 

I'm not a pet person either, but I do appreciate how important some people's pets are to them.....but I don't agree that that means I have to appreciate them in my home. I stopped allowing people to bring their pets the time the neighbor's dog "marked" it's territory and the neighbor couldn't understand why I was upset...."it's what dog's do". Um, sorry, NOT in my house ever again. Neighbor never came over again either, lol. We moved away the following year having never been able to reconcile with her....she told other neighbors WE were rude.

[myfunnybunch]

Yes, it is rude.

 

Sorry they didn't think to respect you enough to at least ask.

 

Cat

[newlifemom]

They had another dog who died last summer and this dog is still a new member of the family. Their other dog was brought over and I am not sure why they would think it would be ok without asking. Truthfully, I am glad they never brought the other one over. He was lovable, but very stinky in more ways than one and shed all over the place.

 

I think b/c this dog is smaller and don't these types not shed and that kind of thing they seemed to think that gave them license. Again, if they asked I would have said yes. I just would have appreciated being asked. KWIM?

 

Ah well, every time my bil tries to do something to get my goat and this was the thing this time. At least he didn't try to sneak my kids into doing things against family rules this time. :glare:

 

I really try, but the guy has not ever liked me. I am too much like my dad I guess. I tell you as a Christian I am supposed to love him and I am trying, but each year it gets harder and harder. I wish he would just accept that not everyone is going to be like him and appreciate diversity. :D

[Ravin]

Yes it was rude. I'd say so even if DH WASN'T allergic to dogs. As it is, if they did that at my house, I'd politely explain that the dog can't come inside, and welcome them to put the crate in the garage or on the back patio, depending on the time of year and which place is cooler. Running our backyard wouldn't be an option, either, it isn't dog-proofed and the pup would probably find his way onto the municipal golf course. When the dog needed out for a stretch they could make like a smoker and go hang out outside for a while.

[Vanna]

They had another dog who died last summer and this dog is still a new member of the family. Their other dog was brought over and I am not sure why they would think it would be ok without asking. Truthfully, I am glad they never brought the other one over. He was lovable, but very stinky in more ways than one and shed all over the place.

 

I think b/c this dog is smaller and don't these types not shed and that kind of thing they seemed to think that gave them license. Again, if they asked I would have said yes. I just would have appreciated being asked. KWIM?

 

Ah well, every time my bil tries to do something to get my goat and this was the thing this time. At least he didn't try to sneak my kids into doing things against family rules this time. :glare:

 

I really try, but the guy has not ever liked me. I am too much like my dad I guess. I tell you as a Christian I am supposed to love him and I am trying, but each year it gets harder and harder. I wish he would just accept that not everyone is going to be like him and appreciate diversity. :D

I would say that this person was very rude to bring over this dog w/o asking first. I don't care if the dog came in 1st place at the Purina Dog Chow Dog Show, it's still a pet and pets (sorry for all those pet lovers out there) are not people. Like you said, there may have been ppl allergic. Even more important than that, this is YOUR home and pets can be unpredictable with what comes off them and "out of" them, YKWIM?

 

If an invite to your home is ever again extended to this dog's owner, I would make it plain that "Fido" is not welcome/included. If you find yourself too upset over the situation that just happened, then you may have to talk to the pet owner about it right away.

[Harriet Vane]

Yes, it is rude.

 

Sorry they didn't think to respect you enough to at least ask.

 

Cat

 

:iagree:

[BigMamaBird]

It wouldn't bother me; but the fact that they didn't even ask you is rude. In your home they should have asked your permission.

[unsinkable]

I am going to let it go, but wanted to vent just a bit. Please tell me that it is rude to bring your dog to a family party, w/o warning the host family who have many allergies [although to be fair not of dogs] but does not own any pets and doesn't particularly like dogs. [They are great for others, just not us] And then without asking bring him into the house.

 

I mean, he was a small dog, one of those poodle mixes, maybe a labradoodle?, well-behaved and wasn't in for very long periods, more of just a stretch b/c he was in the crate the whole time.

 

I would have said yes if I was asked, but honestly, it really peeves me that they did not.

 

I did not say anything, and again the dog was not in for long periods, but still. Plus, they let him off leash in my house without permission. :001_huh:

 

My dh say it is about them setting boundaries and defining our relationship with them, which is rocky at best. IDK, just really bothered me.

 

FTR, I like dogs, as long as they are not mine and don't poop in my yard. :tongue_smilie:

 

Yes, it's very rude.

 

My DH's sis did this to her brother & his wife. She knew they wouldn't want the dog in their house but did it anyway. She then snickered and sniggered behind their backs about it for months. She kept mocking the "shocked" look on their faces when she walked in the house with the puppy.

 

She thought it was OK b/c the puppy couldn't be left alone for too long and b/c they were so uptight that they had too many rules anyway.

[Tammyla]

:iagree: It was rude.

[Mary in VA]

Yes, it was rude! I love dogs and cats, but we even put ours away when guests who aren't "friends" with them come over because not everyone appreciates animals. (and they're well behaved:001_smile:) I would never think it is okay to take my animals to someone else's house univited!

 

Mary

[DianeW88]

Horribly rude. My BIL and his fiancee attempted to do this at Thanksgiving. We had four cats at the time. Yeah. My dh told them "no" and future SIL stayed at her parents with their "child" (her words, not mine), who apparently would have been too lonely without "mommy". :glare:

[Ellie]

I mean, he was a small dog, one of those poodle mixes, maybe a labradoodle?, well-behaved and wasn't in for very long periods, more of just a stretch b/c he was in the crate the whole time. :tongue_smilie:

"Labradoodles" are a mix between a labrador retriever and a standard poodle, so, no, a little dog wouldn't have been that particular mixed-breed.

 

But you say he was in the crate for the whole time, except for a little stretch now and then? Well, um, that doesn't seem so bad to me. I'd have been way more offended if his owners had treated him like one of their children and let him run around the house. So my vote is not "rude;" a little thoughtless, maybe, but not enough to be "rude." Maybe they couldn't leave him at home because they were going to be gone for a long time, so they did the best they could: brought a crate and kept him in it "the whole time."

[shinyhappypeople]

Rude.

 

I know this is an unpopular opinion, but what is it with people bringing their pets everywhere? Bleh. I adore our cat. He's a sweetie. But, at the end of a day he's.an.animal. Not a child. I'm trying to imagine even wanting to take a pet with us to a family function.

 

Maybe it's the excessive Looney Tunes our generation watched as children. All those anthropomorphized (sp?) animals skewed our thinking. :tongue_smilie: :D

[CalicoKat]

my sister and niece contemplated bring along their hamsters. . . . . . :001_huh:

 

Rodents ((shudder)) . . . . . . .

 

They didn't. Thankfully. Little creatures like that. ((shudder)). Can't abide. The scratching. Scurrying. Beady little eyes. Ugh.

 

At the moment I'm being held hostage at home by a rodent in my VAN! DH set my trap lines but I just can't risk driving until it's dead. Headline news would have have a hay day-- Homeschool mom of 6 drives car off the road because a rodent was sited munching on day old fries in the back seat. :auto: Funny, but seriously it wouldn't be far from the truth.

[KnitWit]

Yes, it was rude.

 

I wouldn't have even said yes if asked. We have an OUTside dog for a reason. It's my house. I don't owe an explanation.

[lmrich]

It is rude. We bring our dog with us but we always ASK first! It is just common sense to ask first.

[laughing lioness]

Rude. Friends visited us and brought thier small dog with- inside, outside,everywhere. Our dogs caught a skin disease from hers- couple vet trips/antibiotics, etc. argh!

[OnTheBrink]

Yes, it was rude! I love dogs and cats, but we even put ours away when guests who aren't "friends" with them come over because not everyone appreciates animals. (and they're well behaved:001_smile:) I would never think it is okay to take my animals to someone else's house univited!

 

Mary

 

 

:iagree:

 

I have 3 cats and a dog. If someone's coming over (except a very close friend; there's more latitude with them) then the dog gets crated and the cats are banished to the basement for the duration of the visit. I'm more apt to let the dog out of her crate if the visitor likes dogs and doesn't mind mine on their lap, but overall, pets get put away when people are over.

 

To take an animal into someone's home uninvited is totally rude. The most well-behaved dog can, in a situation of stress or anxiety, behave unpredictably. You have every right to be upset by it.

[Laurie4b]

I wouldn't bring my dog without permission, but on the other side of the coin:

 

For some people, their dogs are like children. That is truly how they feel about them and so being asked not to bring them would draw about the same reaction as a homeschooler asked not to bring their children.

 

If the dog was in a crate most of the time, I think they were trying to be reasonably polite. I would let it go on the Rude/polite stuff. But since you dislike animals in your home, I would tell them that you are not comfortable with it and leave it at that. I think it would be good to tell them now, not wait until next visit. So something like, "I didn't want to say anything while you were here and spoil the holiday, but I'm really not comfortable with pets (don't say animals) in our house. Just wanted you to know this for next time.)

 

Last Christmas, lacking pet-sitting availablity here, I asked to bring our dog to a relative's home 7 hours away, got permission "Of course you cna bring her!", and only after I arrived did I find that the dog couldn't come in the house but had to stay in the garage due to allergies of someone else who regularly visited (but wasn't there then.) (Dogs had always been in the house before--so I had no reason to think the dog couldn't come in. The "allergies of another visitor" thing was new.) It was a total mess. Our dog was scared and barked constantly, keeping us awake, so I had to sleep in the van with her the first night so that others could sleep, then had to go through a big rigamarole to get her some doggie valium so that we could leave her in the garage. That's what I got AFTER asking. I thought that was rude.

[Imprimis]

Rude.

 

I know this is an unpopular opinion, but what is it with people bringing their pets everywhere?

 

:iagree:. My daughter and I were Christmas shopping a couple of weeks ago at a local mall, and I can't tell you how many dogs we saw... popping up out of large handbags, cradled in arms, riding in strollers, and---one little beauty---standing on a leash in the very nice, carpeted seating area---lifting its leg to pee all over the side of a chair and the carpet, while the owner stood there unaware as she was chatting with someone. :confused:

[Tree House Academy]

I wouldn't personally do it without asking (or at all, really), but we have family members who do it all the time. They do it moreso at my MILs house because my MIL doesn't have any pets in the house. Here, they know my cocker spaniel is tempermental and doesn't like other dogs, so they don't bring pets in my house without making sure I ok it and put Rosco away. He loves cats and my mom's really small, non-active Shih-tzu though...go figure!

[Desert Strawberry]

Rude. My dad brings his (my mom's before she died) large Chihuahua with him or leaves her with a neighbor. But he is very careful to only bring her where he knows she will be welcome.

 

The dogs-are-children standpoint really bugs me. Dogs are NOT children. They will not grow up and join society as productive adults. They do not need to learn to interact with others in social situations for the sake of their future.

 

I have been asked to many child-inappropriate events. I make arrangements for them or, more likely, I do not go. If you cannot leave you dog behind, that is fine with me. BUt you may have to excuse yourself from events where dogs are not welcome.

 

And FTR, I would be fine with a guest bringing a small pet. My cat stays outside. I don't like litter boxes of pet hair, or other naughtiness that pets incur. I have toddlers. That is plenty for me. If you bring your pet, you clean up after it, and my kids may terrorize it, because htat is what toddlers do to small pets. That's why we don't have one.

[Guest RecumbentHeart]

Rude. My SIL brings hers from time to time although doesn't bring it inside but we don't want it here at all. We don't have allergies, we just don't want flees.

 

I wouldn't have any problem telling someone their pet needed to stay outside and handing them a bag to pick up after it if that was an issue ( which it would be to me if we had a yard that the children played in).

[newlifemom]

"Labradoodles" are a mix between a labrador retriever and a standard poodle, so, no, a little dog wouldn't have been that particular mixed-breed.

 

But you say he was in the crate for the whole time, except for a little stretch now and then? Well, um, that doesn't seem so bad to me. I'd have been way more offended if his owners had treated him like one of their children and let him run around the house. So my vote is not "rude;" a little thoughtless, maybe, but not enough to be "rude." Maybe they couldn't leave him at home because they were going to be gone for a long time, so they did the best they could: brought a crate and kept him in it "the whole time."

 

Yeah, I had no problem with this dog actually coming. I just want to be asked, that is all.

[kewb]

That is 100% rude. It is never okay to bring your dog without asking first.

[myfunnybunch]

Ah well, every time my bil tries to do something to get my goat and this was the thing this time.

 

Uuuuugggghhh! :glare: Pot-stirrers are the worst!!

 

You're right, though, at least it was only the dog this time. Maybe if he sees he can't get your goat he'll stop trying so hard!

 

Cat

[boscopup]

As a dog and cat owner, with dogs and cats in the house, and having brought my large dog (see my avatar) to other people's houses and outside events and even Lowe's many a time... I think it was rude. They should have asked. I never would bring a pet to someone's house without making sure it was a-ok to do so, no matter how well socialized, how clean, or how obedient my pet is.

 

(and why bring my dog to Lowe's? Well, because a) it's allowed, and b) socialization for a dog is very important if you want to avoid biting accidents and other such behaviors in the future... because he'd been exposed to all kinds of people of different shapes, sizes, and colors, he was perfectly ok when my child brought a new friend over that he'd never seen before ;) )

[ktgrok]

I am a Veterinary Technician and Dog Trainer. I LOVE dogs.All dogs. And I still was upset that my BIL and his girlfriend brought over a dog on Christmas without asking. We have 3 dogs of our own, and 2 cats, and there were too many people here for me to supervise how all of them would interact with this new dog. So it went in the bathroom and stayed locked in there for the evening. Even worse, we had paid for a hotel room for them and they hadn't told us they were bringing a dog. we had to scramble to get them switched to a pet friendly room, and had there not been one we really would have had a problem. So yes, totally rude, no matter how you feel about dogs.

[Mommy22alyns]

I would have been seriously put out. That was very rude.