As we approach high school, we get more feedback that ds should be in school...

[Sunshine State Sue]

As we approach high school, we get more feedback that ds should be in school. Is this just our experience or is this a common theme?

 

It makes me angry! :cursing: What gives these people the right to express this? To make matters worse, dh is the minister and the "people" are several congregants. It's not like I can tell them to go jump off a cliff. :banghead:

 

My mistake is trying to be authentic when my "role" demands I be superficial. :crying: I have been talking about the high school options and considering what we will do. I guess I just need to keep my thoughts within my family, where the decision resides. But, I need to *talk* about it and being the sole female in my family, no one wants to listen to me. Guess I need to speak with homeschool friends, not congregants. I can be authentic with homeschool friends (and even a few friends who don't homeschool).

 

So, is this just our experience?

[justamouse]

Nope, not just yours. It's horrid, isn't it? I got my daughter into a shop class at the county tech school and all I hear about is how smart she is and the teachers are really pressing her to go full time. I want to ask them why they want to take credit for all my hard work! Or, they could think that I'll be doing her an injustice and I want to remind them who got her to where she is right now.

 

So, basically I look at it as a compliment.

 

 

:grouphug:

 

I'm sorry you have to be superficial. I hate it when that happens. I think you must be doing a fantastic job if they're bothering you that much.

[SonshineLearner]

I think it could be for a couple of reasons... it's the first time a mom or dad thinks that oustide schooling might be better, themselves. After all, I feel like I'd have to lock my child in a box for them to not be ok until 5th or 6th. BUT, this year (6th) I've started to really look at what she needs for LIFE:-) for college... etc.... I actually would send her to a Classical Christian school. That's, of course, if there was one close...and if I could afford it:-)

 

While I wonder why children are sent so early... sending kids when they are 13 or so... doesn't sound so bad. But, of course, what helped you get him where he is... is what will help you decide what's best for his last few years that you're responsible for...

 

Carrie:-)

[ChemMommy]

I learned the hard way that, with some people, I have to not be open to them about the ups and downs of homeschooling. I can never discuss curriculum failures or off-days. I can not vent.

 

Sadly, I play things close to my heart and share only with my husband. Or maybe on this board. After 11 years, that's one lesson I've learned very, very well.

 

I can't imagine what being a pastor's wife must be like. You are on display even if you DON'T homeschool! Big :grouphug: to you.

 

Chat curriculum all you want on the boards. I can listen to that stuff all day.

 

My poor dh got to the point that he told me to just order whatever I wanted just so I would stop talking about it and showing him catalogs! :lol:

[Jane in NC]

Dear Sue,

 

When we began homeschooling in 7th grade, there were people who thought that this was just one of Jane's Wild Hairs, an idea that she would get out of her system in a year or two. One family member even went so far as to call the Board of Education to learn about what courses were available at our local high school so that she could tell me how my son was missing out!

 

Ninth grade is embraced by both parents and students with optimism. We had people approach us regularly to tell us about the fun of playing in the band at football games or about sports programs. Rarely did they try to impress us with academics. Around 10th grade, parents usually comment "I wish that I could have homeschooled." It seems that there are 10th and 11th graders that everyone knows who stumble into trouble with drugs or alcohol. Kids who were excited to play sports initially are often put off by the social pressures felt by team cliques. (Quitting school sports then becomes another problem because in a small town everyone acts as though the child who quit the sport has deserted them!) Parents who felt that they had to have their child at the public high school for sports scholarship opportunities usually realize around 10th or 11th that it is the rare kid who earns a sports scholarship. Odds are better for merit aid--"Jane, maybe you did do something right by keeping your son at home."

 

At some point, our high schoolers distinguish themselves by doing interesting things. When those who question your decisions now see your child pursuing a passion or availing himself of opportunities not open to kids who are locked into public school schedules, they might agree that homeschooling was a good decision--or at least not a bad one. Some, I am afraid, will never be happy unless your validate their lives by making identical choices to theirs.

 

One of the strongest supporters of our homeschooling endeavor is a friend who is a public school teacher. Her daughter was a sickly kid when young and she had realized a long time ago how quickly and efficiently lessons could be delivered in a one on one fashion. She is not a textbook teacher so she was envious that we could go beyond the book in our studies. When the going got rough, I could turn to her for support, as she would always remind me that those failings over which I worried were minimal compared to the good things happening in our home school.

 

As others have said, keep in mind that the Virtual Teacher's Lounge over here in WTM land is always open.

 

:grouphug:

Jane

[elegantlion]

Jane, thank for your wonderful words.

 

Sue, I'm sorry you're dealing with that. I know those comments are coming for us as well. I already get those "Are you still homeschooling" comments from people I don't talk to regularly. Then there is the "oh" or the subtle sigh after I give my enthusiastic "Yes, it works really well for our family."

[creekland]

We started homeschooling when my oldest reached high school - BECAUSE I work in the high school and see what goes on there (social life and more) - and what doesn't (in depth learning). When people question me about it I can just point to my school's failing scores... titles of courses do not make educated students.

 

Now that my oldest is a senior in hs and is both socially and academically fine we're starting to get comments on how we did the right thing and what a great family we have. In the beginning there were lots of questions and insinuations... Sometimes you just have to plug on and let the evidence show itself a few years down the road.

[Jean in Wisc]

Yes, they had to tell us that it was time to quit the experiment and put our kids in school. Today I have children that everyone respects and are doing fine in college. They are not dating someone that makes you shudder...a whole list of good things.

 

Funny story--my son's prof was leading a discussion on an article that claimed public schools were failing to prepare students for college. Only 3 students were participating in the class discussion--my homeschooled son, another homeschooler who finished the last couple of years in public school (he'd finished homeschooling, but he wanted to go for sports, so he re-did his junior and senior year) and a boy from some country in Eastern Europe.

 

Um. Ya think?

 

One girl's comment after class was that she couldn't think of anything to say.

 

Jean

[Storm Bay]

We get it, too. And there are sometimes when, at 14, my dd acts in such a manner that I briefly wonder why I have her at home. However, most of the time I'm happy. My dd has a small social life, which I'm sure is frowned on by many who think that the larger one's social cricle is, the better socialized they are. But dd is happy to be her own person and doesn't want to have a lot of friends. However, even though we have many teen-mother moments, I know that she is not out drinking, doing drugs, sleeping with boys, going to raves sneaking into clubs (well, she doesn't look old enough to get in yet), etc. Plus, I get rewarding moments such as last night when, armed with some sagacious comments about writing proofs I went to her to find out that, despite her vehement protests a couple of days before, she'd realized that she really should learn to use the Arithmetic Postulates after all. Or times when she tells me that even though she doesn't like it when I give her boundaries & consequences, she knows its right. I went to public school and had a large social circle at her age, but I certainly hadn't figured that out yet by dd's age.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

We're feeling the same pressure here. Locally, "high school" starts in grade 7. And that's where my son is now at.

 

I must admit I question myself often, whether to keep him home or not. Academically, I know I can teach him high school till the end. That's not what scares me. It's more his willingness to work, and he needs someone else than mom to be accountable to. With me, he always gives me the least amount of work possible.

 

He's also really bad at dealing with a timetable. It's so flexible when you're home!

 

And of course, there's external pressure from all over. My parents, who really questioned our homeschooling decision at the beginning, grade 1, do not question us anymore. They've seen our lives, and the kids level of learning. They trust us. I just don't trust myself!

[classicalpw]

I think on some level all of us have experienced this type of response to our decision to homeschool. I have heard quite a few sensational things from my family alone. My brother thinks my son is missing out on being able to pick a date from a variety of young ladies. (he says this knowing my son has chosen purity...) I guess that's why HE went to school. Hmmmm. My Uncle thinks my son is wasting time. It's absurd.

 

In NC We did not have any ability to integrate with the public school for band, athletics, arts, etc. Here in Colorado they welcome us. My son is able to take High School track, be on the chess club and they even set up a teacher for the Double Bass through the elementary school (The music teacher there plays the Double Bass professionally and is willing to take on a student privately.) Even if he didn't have this opportunity with the school, as a HS parent, I would find an equivalent. He wouldn't be missing anything.

 

I do have friends I can talk to about homeschooling but they are very few and usually very busy. Usually if I have doubts about curriculum or just need to talk it out (If I'm talking to family or "other" friends) it ends up being an "I told you so" and then a monologue on what he's missing and that he needs to be in public school. I feel very alone in this. It's hard to find objective people to have this type of discussion with. I appreciate all of you on this board.

 

I have heard about this "not being able to be authentic" before. It is sad. Just remember that most people do not understand what we do. It took my husband staying home a week to observe before he realized that it's a full time job and our son was learning everything he should plus enjoying it. He was truly amazed. If only others could have that realization....hmmm. What they usually see is us grocery shopping or at church. They do not see the day to day life we lead nor do they spend time with our children to be able to discern the truth from them. That they are intelligent, well-mannered children with a breadth of knowledge beyond their peers...The ones who do see this are amazed!

 

I'm sorry if I went on and on. Know that you are not alone.

 

Sincerely,

Paula

[Moni]

my "role" demands I be superficial

 

I agree.

 

remember that most people do not understand what we do

 

Quite true. So talking to "these people" is an exercise in talking apples to oranges.

Even a lengthy and well thought out conversation is going to continue to be talking apples to oranges.

 

:seeya:

[Tullia]

The most vocal doubters we had to deal with over the years were fellow church members. And, as a pastor's wife, I know your situation is even tougher. I had a dear friend who was generally positive about what she called competent (whatever that meant) people homeschooling, knew ds well, rejoiced in his accomplishments, but could never quite fathom how it was possible to do high school w/o someone from officialdom blessing our work. It's probably something that is impossible to understand until you've seen it through at least once. To be perfectly honest, there were times when I doubted. There was something about doing report cards, transcripts, and wearing the guidance counselor's hat that unnerved me. I survived, and am cautiously optimistic that ds has too.

 

:grouphug:

[Ellie]

As we approach high school, we get more feedback that ds should be in school. Is this just our experience or is this a common theme?

Yeah, that's pretty common.

 

It makes me angry! :cursing: What gives these people the right to express this? To make matters worse, dh is the minister and the "people" are several congregants. It's not like I can tell them to go jump off a cliff. :banghead:

Although that's true, it is also true that your position doesn't give the congregants the right to tell you what they think you should do with your own children.

 

My mistake is trying to be authentic when my "role" demands I be superficial. :crying: I have been talking about the high school options and considering what we will do. I guess I just need to keep my thoughts within my family, where the decision resides. But, I need to *talk* about it and being the sole female in my family, no one wants to listen to me. Guess I need to speak with homeschool friends, not congregants. I can be authentic with homeschool friends (and even a few friends who don't homeschool).

Yes, that's right. You need to keep your thoughts to yourself when you're talking to your congregants. Even non-homeschooling pastors' wives have discovered that very same thing. Talk to your homeschooling friends about homeschooling, to your congregants about other things. You can be "authentic" about all sorts of things while not being too transparent.

[JennW in SoCal]

We homeschoolers think longer and harder about education than our peers who have kids at public school, so while we can talk "authentically" about our decisions and what has gone into making those decisions, it sounds to others like gobblety gook. Their eyes glaze over, and they see all that thinking as a waste of time when a perfect mindless solution is there in the neighborhood.

 

You can smile when the congregants ask about homeschooling, and say with an earnestly straight face, that you are homeschooling with a Well Trained Mind Scholars Forum, complete with a teacher's lounge! Go on to say that yes, my teen will have a different high school experience, but it fits him, and we thank God every day that we are blessed to be able to school him until college.

 

That should stop them! Don't give them any fuel by sharing your deep philosophical musings about education. Just the facts ma'am, and how is your son enjoying high school?

 

We homeschool through a public charter, which to me is a huge compromise of my philosophical homeschool ideal. It cracks me up though that everytime someone asks me if I'm still homeschooling through high school, and I mention the charter school, they immediately relax. They can understand public schools, even though they have no clue what a charter is. It fits their narrow picture of what an education should be and they don't have to try to figure out what homeschooling is and if I'm destroying my children through my hair brained ideas. That is why I figure you can come up with a name for what high school will be, have pat answers for transcripts, AP, and college admissions, and it will stop the nay sayers.

 

Alright. I'd better start the school day here....

[Sunshine State Sue]

I have been talking about the high school options and considering what we will do.

Dh reminded me that if I discuss the matter with others, I give them the opportunity to provide unsolicited advice. :glare:

 

I want to ask them why they want to take credit for all my hard work!

:lol:

 

Funny story--my son's prof was leading a discussion on an article that claimed public schools were failing to prepare students for college. Only 3 students were participating in the class discussion--my homeschooled son, another homeschooler who finished the last couple of years in public school (he'd finished homeschooling, but he wanted to go for sports, so he re-did his junior and senior year) and a boy from some country in Eastern Europe.

 

Um. Ya think?

 

One girl's comment after class was that she couldn't think of anything to say.

OMG! :lol:

 

Thanks, everyone. It helps to know that I am not the only one. Our choices here are:

ps - free and poor quality

private - expensive and good quality

cc (in 10th grade) - free and good quality

 

Ds doesn't want to go to hs. It ought to be a no-brainer to me. But, I seem to want to wrestle with it.

 

Perhaps I ought to haul ds down to the cc and have him take the placement test. I'm fairly certain that he could pass it. That way, I can tell everyone that he's officially "able".

Edited September 21, 2009 by Sue in St Pete

[Sunshine State Sue]

We homeschoolers think longer and harder about education than our peers who have kids at public school, so while we can talk "authentically" about our decisions and what has gone into making those decisions, it sounds to others like gobblety gook. Their eyes glaze over, and they see all that thinking as a waste of time when a perfect mindless solution is there in the neighborhood.

:lol: You're right!

 

We homeschool through a public charter, which to me is a huge compromise of my philosophical homeschool ideal. It cracks me up though that everytime someone asks me if I'm still homeschooling through high school, and I mention the charter school, they immediately relax.

Whenever anyone brings up the "S" issue, I tell them that ds is on the ps basketball team, and that seems to satisfy them. Never mind that he doesn't socialize with his teammates. :confused:

[Nan in Mass]

Our school system is one of the best, but people still don't tend to argue when I say we're homeschooling for high school. They usually ask about science labs (one of my own worries), and I mention the community college, and they want to know if they are lonely and wonder about girls, and I tell them about gymnastics. At that point, they decide that either my children are advance, or that they are olympic sports material, which is rather embarrassing, since they aren't really. As Jane pointed out, once my middle one began to peacewalk, people decided the homeschooling was cool. If pushed, I say something like, "Public school has advantages and homeschooling has advantages. My children tend to learn better at home." This makes it sound vaguely as though there is something wrong with my children that they cannot manage at school, and people are too polite to inquire further. It also keeps them from feeling defensive.

 

I have nobody to talk to about homeschooling except here. Even my family, who are pretty sympathetic and supportive, don't want to hear about it. It is boring for them. My best audience is my teacher-sister, who at least is mildly interested in the educational choices I have to make, but she is very busy with her own choices. My mother, if I am desperate, will listen and tell me what she thinks. So will my husband. Mostly, I just don't talk about this huge thing that consumes most of my time and thought, even to my nearest and dearest. But is that really so different than many people with their work? I am so very grateful for the hive.

 

-Nan

[Moni]

Whenever anyone brings up the "S" issue, I tell them that ds is on the ps basketball team:

 

Whenever they bring up socialization, ask them what they mean and Pause for their answer.

And then request clarification of their example.

 

These folks tend to answer their own questions.

But....repeat their answer back to them.

 

"Are you asking if Johnny is.....on a basketball team?" (pause, wait for them to reply)

 

They will say something like, Well, yeah, like that.

 

You can then (finally) state, "Yes, Johnny is on a basketball team."

 

Then pause. They speak next. ;)

 

I do not assume I know what they are asking.

I do require them to, at least twice, clarify what they are asking.

Many times they don't know what they are asking.

If they don't know, they can't ask, and it spares you an answer.

 

And questions that start with What about..... I ask them right back.

What about socialization.

Oh, socialization.....what about socialization...?...?...?

 

What about him getting out?

Oh, him getting out, what about it now....?......?....

 

Such as being on a ball team or something like that.

Are you asking whether he is on a ball team?.....?......?

 

Yes

Yes, he's on a ball team.

 

What about Algebra?

Oh, Algebra, yeah....what about it now ... ? ... ? ...

 

What you going to do about Algebra?

Do about it...what now...?...?..

 

How are you going to teach Algebra?

Are you asking if Johnny is learning algebra?

 

Yes.

Yes, he's learning algebra.

 

:seeya:

Edited September 21, 2009 by Moni

[Storm Bay]

Whenever they bring up socialization, ask them what they mean and Pause for their answer.

And then request clarification of their example.

 

These folks tend to answer their own questions.

But....repeat their answer back to them.

 

"Are you asking if Johnny is.....on a basketball team?" (pause, wait for them to reply)

 

They will say something like, Well, yeah, like that.

 

You can then (finally) state, "Yes, Johnny is on a basketball team."

 

Then pause. They speak next. ;)

 

I do not assume I know what they are asking.

I do require them to, at least twice, clarify what they are asking.

Many times they don't know what they are asking.

If they don't know, they can't ask, and it spares you an answer.

 

And questions that start with What about..... I ask them right back.

What about socialization.

Oh, socialization.....what about socialization...?...?...?

 

What about him getting out?

Oh, him getting out, what about it now....?......?....

 

Such as being on a ball team or something like that.

Are you asking whether he is on a ball team?.....?......?

 

Yes

Yes, he's on a ball team.

 

What about Algebra?

Oh, Algebra, yeah....what about it now ... ? ... ? ...

 

What you going to do about Algebra?

Do about it...what now...?...?..

 

How are you going to teach Algebra?

Are you asking if Johnny is learning algebra?

 

Yes.

Yes, he's learning algebra.

 

:seeya:

 

 

I like this, but wonder with my personality if I could carry this off.

[TXMary2]

Unfortunately, it's not just you. I have already graduated one, with two more to go! When I run into people sometimes I hear, "Are you still doing that homeschool thing?" Or when they ask how is my oldest son I tell them he graduated this year and that he is currently working full time with plans to continue with community college. I have had 3 different people ask me upon hearing he graduated, "Oh, he did?! That's great that you put him in school." or words to that effect. I then tell them that I graduated him from our homeschool and they just have these blank looks on their face like they don't understand - and they don't understand.

[Moni]

I like this, but wonder with my personality if I could carry this off.

 

Oh, it's all done very sweetly.

 

It does kinda look snarky when typed, but if you smile, speak slowly, sparkle your eyes, feign ignorance, appear genuine...and pause.... it's very effective.

 

Again, because these whole conversations Really are apples to oranges, it is genuinely helpful to have the Person define their question so you can answer them most appropriately.

 

If they are veiling snarky remarks in their vague question, the conversation sizzles out and you save them face of their being snarky.

 

If they really wonder whether your student doesn't have to "do P.E." or "take algebra," then their question does get answered (once they've figured out how to actually ask it.)

 

:seeya:

[Janice H]

 

smile, speak slowly, sparkle your eyes, feign ignorance, appear genuine...and pause.... it's very effective.

...sort of how Marilyn Monroe would have done it. (This loose association was caused by watching All About Eve last night; she had a small part.)

[jibaker103]

Of all people who give me a hard time about hs is my brother!! He calls every 2 weeks or so to have a "chat" which goes into his being worried about Noah from a sports and socialization aspect!!! :001_huh:

 

Luckily my dad and mom are both supportive and if I get my mom to sit down and stop talking she will actually listen and give advice on curriculum, scheduling, etc.!!! :lol:

[MIch elle]

I have nobody to talk to about homeschooling except here. Even my family, who are pretty sympathetic and supportive, don't want to hear about it. It is boring for them. Mostly, I just don't talk about this huge thing that consumes most of my time and thought, even to my nearest and dearest. But is that really so different than many people with their work? I am so very grateful for the hive.

 

-Nan

 

 

I would guess that many of us that hang out here feel this way.

[Gwen in VA]

Neither my parents nor my dh's parents have ever accepted hs'ing.

 

When the kids were younger, we were told at hs conventions that unaccepting relatives see would see the wonderful results of hs'ing and become converts.

 

Our relatives think that our kids are wonderful, charming, etc. etc. etc. But they think that our kids are wonderful DESPITE being homeschooled, not because of it! :confused:

 

Oh well! You can't please all the people all the time. And sometimes you can't even please some of the people some of the time! So we just do what we think God has called us to do and let the chips fall where they fall.......

[Carol in Cal.]

I think that we have all been there. People have expectations and concerns; society has 'norms.' We are just different, that's all.

 

It's difficult, sometimes, not to become defensive. We all want others to understand and appreciate what we do.

 

I think that the decision of whether or not to homeschool high school is far more fraught than for earlier years. It's so make or break; it's so all or nothing. People who have never felt comfortable voicing just how weird they think homeschooling is might come out of the woodwork and bring it up at that point, out of genuine fear/love for the students.

 

I think that when we talk to others about homeschooling decisions, too, sometimes we want support and cheers and sometimes we want information and opinions. People who don't know anything about homeschooling are not good sources of information and opinions, and can not be depended on to cheer or be supportive. And some people who homeschool are such advocates for it that they can't EVER say that it might be good to stop now.

 

The moral of the story, I think, is to find and consult with people who know about homeschooling but are not so wedded to it that they give unrealistic advice, and really get some good, solid planning going before you talk to them. And just don't talk about this with anyone else. Remember that bean dip! Don't give anyone a reason to make you want to talk about bean dip!!!:001_smile:

[Brenda in MA]

Oh well! You can't please all the people all the time. And sometimes you can't even please some of the people some of the time! So we just do what we think God has called us to do and let the chips fall where they fall.......

 

These are my thoughts exactly. dh & I are happy with the results of homeschooling and that's all that matters to us. For us, our parents came around after a few years and seeing what mature young men we are raising. Other friends, relatives, and neighbors are another story.

 

We just feel like we need to persevere and do what we think is best. As Margaret said, a lot of the naysayers dropped off once the oldest got into a good college with a scholarship. Even though staying the course is hard, I think we are doing the right thing as setting an example for the homeschooling families in our hs group who currently have younger children. Just this past spring, one family pulled their high schooler from private school to homeschool, and another family is considering doing the same. Both children were doing well at school, but the families saw the flexibility of homeschooling and the time and outside opportunities that their dc would gain from learning at home.

 

Our successes can give confidence to others. Sue -- if you and your dh feel that continuing to homeschool through high school is the right decision, then you very well might be a good example to others in the years to come. The climate might be hard for you now, but the rewards come later.

 

Come here anytime you want to chat about homeschooling. That's what I do.

 

Best wishes,

Brenda

[Moni]

a lot of the naysayers dropped off once the oldest got into a good college with a scholarship

 

And a good many stay when your student ends up in trade school or community college for two years before/if even transferring to University.

 

It's okay....!... :lol:.....These folks are entitled to be incorrect. Let them be so. ;)

 

They aren't convincing me. I have no particular interest in devoting my time or mental energy convincing them.

 

:seeya:

[kpupg]

Sue,

I can't add anything substantive to what the other wise women here have said, but I can't resist adding my yeah, me, too to this ...

 

Whenever anyone brings up the "S" issue, I tell them that ds is on the ps basketball team, and that seems to satisfy them. Never mind that he doesn't socialize with his teammates. :confused:

 

My ds14 does fencing. He spends 8 hours a week at the fencing studio ... more if it's a tournament weekend. He has said numerous times that he goes there to fence and he doesn't want to mess around. He is an assistant instructor for the little kids. He has gained leadership skills in that, which I believe led to ... he called a student his own age out for messing around ... told him that if he didn't want to fence, he shouldn't come to the studio ... yah, that socialization thing, heh heh.

 

Karen

[kpupg]

Whenever they bring up socialization, ask them what they mean and Pause for their answer.

And then request clarification of their example.

 

These folks tend to answer their own questions.

But....repeat their answer back to them.

 

 

 

 

Love it !!! :rofl:

[johnandtinagilbert]

Sue,

Hi, it's me over in, Largo. I just wanted to encourage via something I see in our area.

 

PS = not a chance...you know that

 

private Christian = don't be fooled! I see a few good kids coming out of there, but the two "major" (if you will" private Christian schools in our area (K and IR)...let's say I haven't been entirely impressed. I don't necessarily mean academically (which is fair, although not what I'd call great classical :) ), but socially...wow! I don't know where your family stands on issues of dating, purity, chastity, etc., but if you lean conservative in those areas, then I'd avoid any of the high schools in our county...any of them. My witness comes from youth/high school group, co-ops, play groups, and general public observation. Things tend to be a bit, well loose.

 

Sorry you're feeling this way. You have been a light in our community, the home school community and have no reason to believe things will be any different in ds high school years.

 

I do plan on dual enrolling, fwiw, b/c I don't really see that as a social environment, at least not nearly to the extent of the high school environment.

 

:grouphug:

[Storm Bay]

Oh, it's all done very sweetly.

 

It does kinda look snarky when typed, but if you smile, speak slowly, sparkle your eyes, feign ignorance, appear genuine...and pause.... it's very effective.

 

Again, because these whole conversations Really are apples to oranges, it is genuinely helpful to have the Person define their question so you can answer them most appropriately.

 

If they are veiling snarky remarks in their vague question, the conversation sizzles out and you save them face of their being snarky.

 

If they really wonder whether your student doesn't have to "do P.E." or "take algebra," then their question does get answered (once they've figured out how to actually ask it.)

 

:seeya:

 

 

I was sure you did it sweetly. The question is whether or not I could do it sweetly or not. It would depend on the day, the other person, etc. I'm a very intense person who works very hard to cover that up as much as I can, but I have to work with what I have, and I've rarely been called sweet and never laid back.

[Sunshine State Sue]

I do plan on dual enrolling, fwiw, b/c I don't really see that as a social environment, at least not nearly to the extent of the high school environment.

I suggested to 2 other moms the other day that we schedule a teen all-you-can-eat ice cream party at the beach one afternoon. The catch would be that they had to all go in the morning and take the college placement test together. I like the idea. :D

[Sunshine State Sue]

Wow! I think this is the first time I've started a thread and it got 5 stars!!! :hurray: I hope that means that I sparked a thought-provoking conversation. Thanks all. I'm feeling ever so much better now.

[G5052]

The pace of sending homeschooled kids to the classroom seems to take a steep incline in our area around 7th-8th grade because the state makes it tough to get a H.S. diploma from a public school with credits that you bring in unless they're the "right" credits. So the pressure on me is to "get them used to it now or you'll be sorry."

 

I'm committed as ever to see this project through, but my oldest's peers are definitely thinning...

[FloridaLisa]

As we approach high school, we get more feedback that ds should be in school. Is this just our experience or is this a common theme?

So, is this just our experience?

 

We're fortunate to be in large church with many homeschoolers as well as other high school level activities -- speech/debate club and co-op. In fact, almost every new family in our co-op this year joined for their high schoolers! Our small family co-op has 20 homeschoolers.

 

So, there *are* families that are continuing to home educate to college. It helps so much to be part of a strong group of like-minded families.

 

Also, as I've said many times, the high school years are the fruit of those 13 - 14 previous years you've sown into your child. Yes it's hard. Yes you have lots of grading. Yes it can be scary. But my experience so far is that it is tremendously rewarding. I cannot tell you the blessing I feel from walking alongside my ds as he grew from boy to man in these last 4 years.

 

Lisa

[LibraryLover]

We haven't, and I am glad for it! My oldest dd is 17 (hs'd since age 9) and has zero plans to attend HS. She does participate in sports at the local high school however, & that seems to be enough for her. Her teammates and coaches have been wonderful and supportive. She doesn't get any pressure from them at all, and I was worried about that. She has a younger brother at this same HS and doesn't understand why he would bother with it. lol

 

Nor does the 10 yr old for that matter.

[Joan in GE]

got lots of comments about how lucky she is to be at home (this in a country where almost no one homeschools), people do ask me questions about my son (10th). Being the only one I know in Geneva (though 2 in nearby France) to be homeschooling a 10th grader, I've had major doubts.

 

But our course is fixed by circumstances - he'd basically waste a year in the Swiss schools or in the international schools, if he would return to the US next year, besides paying about $25k for the year at the private school, because the credits are not interchangeable.

 

So we've taken the plunge.

 

It is funny, his paternal grandmother is more concerned that his older brothers do not have their driver's license yet.

[Jugglin'5]

 

Also, as I've said many times, the high school years are the fruit of those 13 - 14 previous years you've sown into your child. Yes it's hard. Yes you have lots of grading. Yes it can be scary. But my experience so far is that it is tremendously rewarding. I cannot tell you the blessing I feel from walking alongside my ds as he grew from boy to man in these last 4 years.

 

Lisa

 

Thanks for that encouragement! :thumbup: I have a freshman this year, and it has gotten a bit scary, even though I've always planned to be in it for the long haul.