Miss Peregrine Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 If your 13yo daughter broke someone's wrist at soccer practice? Her team was scrimmaging the boys' team and she accidentally knocked him off his feet. He landed on his wrist. She kept apologizing but he wouldn't talk , he just kept crying. 😓 What more should we do? We don't know him or even his name, though that wouldn't be to hard to find out. It is likely broken but we dont know for sure yet. We will know tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I wouldn't do anything else but maybe send his family a get well card as he recovers, if you can get his name from a coach. It was an accident and is an acceptable risk given the activity. Injuries happen in the normal course of playing, that's life. I'd tell her not to beat herself up about it, it could have just as easily been reversed and your daughter breaking *her* wrist. Life goes on :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I'm glad to hear that she tried to apologize right away. I think that's the most important thing. I agree with the idea of sending a get-well card. I also agree that it's an understood risk of sport and your daughter should not feel guilty. If you are unsure about proper protocol in this situation, I suggest asking the coach. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junie Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I think giving him a get-well card and some cookies might make them both feel better. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forget-Me-Not Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I like the get well card and cookies idea, maybe in a few days when things have settled down. I don't think anything more is needed. I wouldn't even say that *she* broke his wrist. It was just an accident, an accepted risk, that occurs with the sport they both happened to be playing. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abba12 Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Get well card, delivered personally with some brownies. The one in-person followup would show your concern and care without being over the top. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThisIsTheDay Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 SHE didn't break his wrist, and I definitely would have her stop saying/thinking that. Poor girl, and poor boy! I have preached at my kids for years to not land on their hands when falling, but I'm sure we would all do the same in that situation. The cookies and card would be lovely and appreciated, I think. My kids play co-ed soccer, and it's inherently dangerous, particularly for the girls as they get older. One girl was kicked (supposedly accidentally) and had her leg broken. My own girl had a long term injury that has taken a couple of years to heal (bone bruise). 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 It's part of playing a sport. That is all. So you don't need to do anything. Her apologizing and showing concern afterwards was more than enough. But if you/she wants to send a card or some cookies or brownies that's fine and I'm sure would be appreciated! 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jasperstone Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I have preached at my kids for years to not land on their hands when falling, but I'm sure we would all do the same in that situation. ***************** Huh? My son at two had a horrific fall on wet tiles. I wished that he could have broken the fall with getting his hands out. Instead his forehead took all of the force of the fall. And he ended up with concussion, and stopped breathing, and then turned blue!!!!! I thought he was dying.... very, very terrifying!!!!! I'm not understanding what you are meaning here by saying that??? I would rather have had broken wrists to a smashed forehead. :'( I'm curious as to what they are taught to do in a fall. Please explain what I'm missing here. Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Poor kids. I'm just posting to reinforce the ideas of cookies and a card, and that your daughter did not break the boy's wrist. It was an accident and she should not take responsibility for it. She can be sorry that he is hurt but not because she caused it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustEm Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I have preached at my kids for years to not land on their hands when falling, but I'm sure we would all do the same in that situation. ***************** Huh? My son at two had a horrific fall on wet tiles. I wished that he could have broken the fall with getting his hands out. Instead his forehead took all of the force of the fall. And he ended up with concussion, and stopped breathing, and then turned blue!!!!! I thought he was dying.... very, very terrifying!!!!! I'm not understanding what you are meaning here by saying that??? I would rather have had broken wrists to a smashed forehead. :'( I'm curious as to what they are taught to do in a fall. Please explain what I'm missing here. Thanks. You use your forearms to land on not your hands. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Having gone through this with one of my impulsive offspring, I don't know if one can *not* catch themselves with their hands, unless it is a muscle memory thing that you've drilled. The instinct is to break your fall with your hands, unless something else has been trained in its place. Knowing what I know now, I'd pick some soft, cushy grass and practice it with my kids, because in the moment the faller doesn't have time to react with logic. (Guess I should do it for myself, too, while I still have a bit of bounce in me. Ha!) Dd shattered her wrist last Christmas Day, broke it just like a rose blossom forced to open, four pieces in different directions. She jumped and fell on it as she tripped, so there was added height to the fall. It happened so fast that she did not have time to think as she fell. As to the OP, your dd is not responsible for "causing" the boy's accident. The one thing, in hindsight, that she *might* (maybe, possibly) have done differently is to apologize sincerely, then excuse herself to go do something (anything) helpful, so that she wasn't standing there while he cried, on the theory that crying is embarrassing to some kids. (I think crying is warranted under the circumstances, but humans can be very hard on themselves.) If she had been the only one present, leaving him alone would not have been a great idea. OP, your kindness and thoughtfulness is showing. You're raising kids who are the same. Good on ya'! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pehp Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I definitely do not think *she* broke his wrist. He fell on it, and that's that. I broke my arm in college while ice skating when a chubby little kid slammed into me, and I fell onto my wrist/arm. I never thought that little boy did it--it was just an accident. In any case, I think a card would be fine. I probably wouldn't even bake anything, because it's just a sporting accident and it's part of life, but if it makes her/you feel better, I say go for it. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Are you in the sort of country where injuries are unpleasant and unfortunate -- or one where they can cause significant financial hardship, such that a family with an injured child might have actual needs around this misfortune? (Or some families might be looking for any other pseudo-responsible parties to share the burden?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hikin' Mama Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I have preached at my kids for years to not land on their hands when falling, but I'm sure we would all do the same in that situation. ***************** Huh? My son at two had a horrific fall on wet tiles. I wished that he could have broken the fall with getting his hands out. Instead his forehead took all of the force of the fall. And he ended up with concussion, and stopped breathing, and then turned blue!!!!! I thought he was dying.... very, very terrifying!!!!! I'm not understanding what you are meaning here by saying that??? I would rather have had broken wrists to a smashed forehead. :'( I'm curious as to what they are taught to do in a fall. Please explain what I'm missing here. Thanks. There are ways to land when you fall so that you don't break your wrist and you also protect other parts of your body. I think it is taught in martial arts, at least that's what my son, who has taken jujitsu and judo, told me. In fact, he was in a bike accident (the front of his bike frame came apart while he was riding) his freshman year of college and said that his fall training helped him fall properly and reduce/prevent injury. To the OP, your daughter didn't break his wrist, he broke his wrist playing soccer. It happens in sports. It sounds like you have a very kind daughter, though. :) 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inmyopinion Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Re: being taught how to fall, athletes are taught how to fall in order to minimize injury, I think that is what the preparing how to fall comment was referring to. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 One of my daughters fell on her face many times because her reflex to put out her hands was too slow. I wonder if that's why she doesn't like sports now - maybe she wants to avoid falling. I was taught that you fall on your shoulder if possible. But remembering that in a split second is a lot to ask. Anyhoo - accidents happen. It's nobody's fault. I hope he heals quickly and is back in the game soon. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Playing the game broke his wrist, not your daughter. Please tell your daughter that! That said, if she wants to send a card and some little treat, I'm sure it would be considered a nice gesture. I don't think she necessarily needs to track him down and deliver them in person. She could give them to his coach, or whatever. The only safe way I ever knew to land from a fall was to roll as you drop, like what you see in the movies when people are jumping from trains... 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in FL. Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I agree with pps that your dd did not break this boy's wrist. It was just an accident and a risk of playing sports. A card in addition to her previous apology is enough. I hope she knows she didn't do anything wrong! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Peregrine Posted October 13, 2015 Author Share Posted October 13, 2015 Are you in the sort of country where injuries are unpleasant and unfortunate -- or one where they can cause significant financial hardship, such that a family with an injured child might have actual needs around this misfortune? (Or some families might be looking for any other pseudo-responsible parties to share the burden?)Like California? Lol. The thought did cross my mind. The main reason is the boy, though and how he feels. Soccer season isn't even halfway over and he would be out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Another vote for Your daughter didn't break his wrist - it was an accident that happens sometimes when sports are played. Anne 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Tick Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 She did a good, good thing by apologizing. I imagine the boy kept crying because it hurt (and perhaps he was embarrassed). I actually think that despite my instinct to try top "make it right", she shouldn't do anything more. If that is too hard, I might put together a get-well card from the entire team. Injury is one of the risks we all accept when we sign the forms with the small print. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 She didn't "break his wrist." He acquired an injury while playing sports. I applaud her for taking responsibility, but I hope that neither kid blames her. I don't expect the boy to be gracious while he's injured, and it's lovely that you want to do something for him, but this is nobody's fault. I think it would be nice if your daughter got a card for the whole team and coach to sign, but I'd also keep a lookout for any type of resentment and nip that in the bud. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I agree with everyone else. It's a sports injury, and not your daughter's fault at all. My DS wouldn't have wanted to talk at all either, and it wouldn't be that he blamed your DD. He always wants to be alone when he's hurt or upset. If he were crying in public, he'd be embarrassed and even more desirous of privacy. If she wants to send a get well card (not an apology card!) and cookies or Halloween treats, that would be a sweet gesture but in no way necessary. WWYD if it were a son vs daughter? I've read several articles on how females apologize too much, and I've seen it in the office. Anyway, just rambling thoughts... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Peregrine Posted October 13, 2015 Author Share Posted October 13, 2015 Talking more to Dd, she said that the boy told the coach, whom she thinks is his dad, that he rolled over the ball. He didn't connect it with her. Dd said she definitely kicked his foot out from under him. I think we're just going to let it go. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Talking more to Dd, she said that the boy told the coach, whom she thinks is his dad, that he rolled over the ball. He didn't connect it with her. Dd said she definitely kicked his foot out from under him. I think we're just going to let it go. Once I was in a 7-vehicle pile-up on an icy patch of freeway. I was hit hard by a jackknifing semi and thrown into a ditch. A second before that, I had tapped the rear corners of two cars that had slid to a stop on the freeway. When the dust settled, one of those two cars was also in the ditch. The cops came to take everyone's statement. Determined to be honest, I declared that my car had done the damage to those two other cars. Some of the others involved tried to blame it on the semi, but I was adamant. I had hit those cars. I was gonna tell the truth. Only later (when the shock wore off) did I realize that the semi could have *also* hit those cars, and my little tap certainly didn't throw any car into the ditch. I called the insurance company and tried to talk them into changing my statement. Duh. My point being, maybe your daughter did make contact with his foot, but maybe the boy also tripped over the ball. I agree with letting it go. Your daughter did the right thing by apologizing at the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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