Park scenario. Just curious.

[SproutMamaK]

Oh goodness, I want to see the original FB post on this so badly, just to watch the train wreck in action.

[zoobie]

Well, my DD, at age 4, crashed another child's birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese (we go to Atlanta for DH's job several times a year, and after we're kicked out of the hotel the day we leave, that's one of the few places to spend hours with a young child)-she was playing with one of the party guests, and when the kids went back for the party, she followed. I followed to retrieve her, and the mom said that she was welcome-she had extra cake anyway ;).

 

We also had a little girl crash one of DD's parties (at DD's gymnastics gym-it was the gym owner's daughter)- same sort of thing, and when the parent followed upstairs to retrieve her child, I responded the same way-that she was welcome to stay and have a cupcake if the mom didn't mind.

 

But in both cases, I don't think it would have been unreasonable to say "no" to the preschooler. And I certainly can't imagine a parent insisting!

Those are adorably hilarious situations! :)

[Chris in VA]

Oh goodness, I want to see the original FB post on this so badly, just to watch the train wreck in action.

 

*snort*

 

Me, too.

[Mama Geek]

I few weeks ago dd and I were at Chick Fil A and they were setting up for a party right outside the window of the play ground.  The little girl and her family showed up a little early and were playing in the play area.  The party was getting close to starting and you could tell dd wanted to be a part of it.  I called her over to me and told her that it was a birthday party for the little girl and her friends and that she had just met her and she wasn't going to be a part of the party.  She had heard in the play area that it was the girls birthday.  I told her she could wish the girl Happy Birthday and then she needed to go back into the play area and play.  She did that and listened really well to what I told her.  I gave her a few more minutes to play and realized the party was about to start so we packed up and headed out, mostly to make it easier for her. The only thing I wish they had done was set the party up somewhere other than right outside the window for the play area.

 

I would never let dd crash a party.

[Guest submarines]

Ok so now I really want to know who voted for 1 and 4, and if they were serious! 

 

I voted 4. :smilielol5:  If I came to a park expecting an empty-ish area,  and there was a party with a bouncy castle, I'd have to find another place for myself and my kids. Sure, I might get cranky. People get cranky when their expectations are not met. However, I don't feel that they'd have to leave, or that I'm entitled to their snacks, or playing in the their castle. I'd probably laugh at myself for being cranky over this.

[Word Nerd]

 

BTW, another friend who was there had their kid pop two of the party balloons on purpose before they left because they were angry. And another friend just called them out because you CAN rent the pavilions, unlike the friend's claim. 

 

Wow, and I thought the original friend was a spoiled brat!

[bolt.]

I'd be miffed. The presence of, "No, you can't go there! No, none if that is for us!" -- type of temptations at a park can pretty much ruin an outing that was supposed to be enjoyable for youngsters. Not that it shouldn't happen (certainly its a legit use of a park) just that I'd have personal feelings if it did happen to me.

 

Option not there:

 

Smile, shmooze and get chatty with the hostess. Bring over rocks to help hold her table cloths down. Ask the child's name and tell her your children's names and ages. Pause and stare longingly at the wonderful things. Tell her that I hope her guests have a blast. Walk away slowly while glancing over my shoulder frequently.

[OrganicAnn]

Wow popping balloons is really spiteful.  

[cathmom]

If I had a child who really really really wanted to jump in the bounce house, I might go over and politely ask. If they said no, I would explain to dc that they rented it and it's theirs.

[Catwoman]

I'd be miffed. The presence of, "No, you can't go there! No, none if that is for us!" -- type of temptations at a park can pretty much ruin an outing that was supposed to be enjoyable for youngsters. Not that it shouldn't happen (certainly its a legit use of a park) just that I'd have personal feelings if it did happen to me.

Option not there:

Smile, shmooze and get chatty with the hostess. Bring over rocks to help hold her table cloths down. Ask the child's name and tell her your children's names and ages. Pause and stare longingly at the wonderful things. Tell her that I hope her guests have a blast. Walk away slowly while glancing over my shoulder frequently.

Why would you have personal feelings about not being allowed to participate in a party for people you don't know? Why would it upset your children?

 

Even very young kids can understand the concept of "that's someone else's party" and know that it's not for them. It's the same as if a neighbor had a party for their child and your kids weren't invited because they weren't friends with the kid. Wouldn't you just say it's nice that the kid is having a party and that you hope he has a lot of fun?

 

I guess I just don't understand the idea of feeling any resentment over something like that. And even though I'm sure you we're kidding, I think it would be pretty rude to try to guilt the other mom into inviting your kids to her child's party when she doesn't even know you. Honestly, it would kind of creep me out if strangers started helping me set up for my kid's party, and I wouldn't appreciate them asking if their child could use the bounce house I'd rented. It would seem very intrusive.

[swellmomma]

We do parties at the park all the time, though I have never seen anyone have an inflatable there.  I think your friend has an entitlement issue and is raising her kids to as well.  I could not imagine threatening to call the cops about a child's birthday party out of spite because I couldn't get my own way, nor could I imagine allowing my children to crash someone else's party.  At most I would say happy birthday to the birthday boy or girl as we walked by as we left the park, and have done so and others have done with us when we have hosted a party in the park. I have never seen anyone let their kids come in and snag food etc and would be appalled if a friend so proudly admitted to such rude behaviour

[BigMamaBird]

There's no way I would involve myself in a stranger's party.  Period.

[bolt.]

Why would you have personal feelings about not being allowed to participate in a party for people you don't know? Why would it upset your children?

 

Even very young kids can understand the concept of "that's someone else's party" and know that it's not for them. It's the same as if a neighbor had a party for their child and your kids weren't invited because they weren't friends with the kid. Wouldn't you just say it's nice that the kid is having a party and that you hope he has a lot of fun?

 

I guess I just don't understand the idea of feeling any resentment over something like that. And even though I'm sure you we're kidding, I think it would be pretty rude to try to guilt the other mom into inviting your kids to her child's party when she doesn't even know you. Honestly, it would kind of creep me out if strangers started helping me set up for my kid's party, and I wouldn't appreciate them asking if their child could use the bounce house I'd rented. It would seem very intrusive.

 

You seem to be confusing the ideas of "resentment" and disappointment.

 

I wouldn't resent it, and the hypothetical young children I'm imagining would be too young to have such a complex emotion. It's simply disappointing to see, "More fun thing over there, not for me." even if you understand it. It takes quite a bit of the fun out of running around on the ordinary playground equipment.

 

Of course I'd say, "It's nice that the kid is having a party and that I hope he has a lot of fun." -- It would still make *my* day less fun, because *my* toddlers and preschoolers wouldn't be having the kind of great-fun-park-day I had planned for them. They'd be having a, "But Mommy, I wish *I* had a bouncy house too!" kind of day. (Depending on the age, they might even be having the reaction where I'd need to run after them constantly to keep them out of the party zone, and/or having such a wealth of disappointment that park day needed to be over because they lacked the maturity to contain their emotions.)

 

I'm also not talking about "guilt" -- I'm talking about making a new friend and/or seeing if a stranger happened to be a generous type who would love to say "the more the merrier"... Yes, I overstated the idea of staring longingly, etc, but we may be from different cultures. I talk to other moms at the park. If another mom is doing party set up, it would be normal for me to offer help while striking up a conversation.

 

I love that they are having fun. There's no shame, no anger, no resentment. There's just vague annoyance at an unexpected opportunity to help my kids deal with wantfulness and impulse control, when, perhaps, I could have used a nice regular park outing that day.

[NotSoObvious]

Why would you have personal feelings about not being allowed to participate in a party for people you don't know? Why would it upset your children?

 

Even very young kids can understand the concept of "that's someone else's party" and know that it's not for them. It's the same as if a neighbor had a party for their child and your kids weren't invited because they weren't friends with the kid. Wouldn't you just say it's nice that the kid is having a party and that you hope he has a lot of fun?

 

I guess I just don't understand the idea of feeling any resentment over something like that. And even though I'm sure you we're kidding, I think it would be pretty rude to try to guilt the other mom into inviting your kids to her child's party when she doesn't even know you. Honestly, it would kind of creep me out if strangers started helping me set up for my kid's party, and I wouldn't appreciate them asking if their child could use the bounce house I'd rented. It would seem very intrusive.

All of this.

[NotSoObvious]

You seem to be confusing the ideas of "resentment" and disappointment.

 

I wouldn't resent it, and the hypothetical young children I'm imagining would be too young to have such a complex emotion. It's simply disappointing to see, "More fun thing over there, not for me." even if you understand it. It takes quite a bit of the fun out of running around on the ordinary playground equipment.

 

Of course I'd say, "It's nice that the kid is having a party and that I hope he has a lot of fun." -- It would still make *my* day less fun, because *my* toddlers and preschoolers wouldn't be having the kind of great-fun-park-day I had planned for them. They'd be having a, "But Mommy, I wish *I* had a bouncy house too!" kind of day. (Depending on the age, they might even be having the reaction where I'd need to run after them constantly to keep them out of the party zone, and/or having such a wealth of disappointment that park day needed to be over because they lacked the maturity to contain their emotions.)

 

I'm also not talking about "guilt" -- I'm talking about making a new friend and/or seeing if a stranger happened to be a generous type who would love to say "the more the merrier"... Yes, I overstated the idea of staring longingly, etc, but we may be from different cultures. I talk to other moms at the park. If another mom is doing party set up, it would be normal for me to offer help while striking up a conversation.

 

I love that they are having fun. There's no shame, no anger, no resentment. There's just vague annoyance at an unexpected opportunity to help my kids deal with wantfulness and impulse control, when, perhaps, I could have used a nice regular park outing that day.

This was interesting to hear. It makes me wonder about our differing circumstances and how it affects our attitudes about things. I can't imagine the park being a predictable place to take my kids. It never has been. There have been parties, creepy people, sections closed, dangerous trash in the sand, etc. I guess my world has just never been that predictable, and while a million things irritate me to no end, something like the bounce house would probably be the least of my worries for the day and a good time to teach my kids all the manners and lessons mentioned by other posters. If my kids are old enough to verbally whine about "wanting a bounce house, too," they are definitely old enough to start learning they can't have everything they want. 

However, I think I get that you are just saying you'd be silently disappointed, which I get, but realizing the situation itself isn't the problem. (I think.)

[Dandelion]

It's simply disappointing to see, "More fun thing over there, not for me." even if you understand it. It takes quite a bit of the fun out of running around on the ordinary playground equipment.

 

Of course I'd say, "It's nice that the kid is having a party and that I hope he has a lot of fun." -- It would still make *my* day less fun, because *my* toddlers and preschoolers wouldn't be having the kind of great-fun-park-day I had planned for them.

 

I can't relate to this kind of thinking at all.

 

There is the potential for people to be having fun (and perhaps fun not available to us) anywhere we go.  That doesn't mean our day has to be less fun.  Why wouldn't your kids still be able to have the fun park day you planned for them?  Assuming that the party isn't taking up the entire park (making it completely unavailable to you) you should still be able to go about your day.  Sure, it might be a distraction - but I'm not following the "we're now having less fun because we see a party we're not invited to" mentality.  

[Mom in High Heels]

The woman sounds like a real winner. No wonder her kids feel so entitled.

 

I wouldn't want to be friends with her, nor would I want to be in a group that supported her position. It's just wrong on so many levels.

 

I was thinking this too.  Why are you friends with her??????

[mommymilkies]

You seem to be confusing the ideas of "resentment" and disappointment.

 

I wouldn't resent it, and the hypothetical young children I'm imagining would be too young to have such a complex emotion. It's simply disappointing to see, "More fun thing over there, not for me." even if you understand it. It takes quite a bit of the fun out of running around on the ordinary playground equipment.

 

Of course I'd say, "It's nice that the kid is having a party and that I hope he has a lot of fun." -- It would still make *my* day less fun, because *my* toddlers and preschoolers wouldn't be having the kind of great-fun-park-day I had planned for them. They'd be having a, "But Mommy, I wish *I* had a bouncy house too!" kind of day. (Depending on the age, they might even be having the reaction where I'd need to run after them constantly to keep them out of the party zone, and/or having such a wealth of disappointment that park day needed to be over because they lacked the maturity to contain their emotions.)

 

I'm also not talking about "guilt" -- I'm talking about making a new friend and/or seeing if a stranger happened to be a generous type who would love to say "the more the merrier"... Yes, I overstated the idea of staring longingly, etc, but we may be from different cultures. I talk to other moms at the park. If another mom is doing party set up, it would be normal for me to offer help while striking up a conversation.

 

I love that they are having fun. There's no shame, no anger, no resentment. There's just vague annoyance at an unexpected opportunity to help my kids deal with wantfulness and impulse control, when, perhaps, I could have used a nice regular park outing that day.

Thank you for your honesty. 

[mommymilkies]

I was thinking this too.  Why are you friends with her??????

I'm not anymore.  We were part of a group together.  

[Caroline]

 

Option not there:

 

Smile, shmooze and get chatty with the hostess. Bring over rocks to help hold her table cloths down. Ask the child's name and tell her your children's names and ages. Pause and stare longingly at the wonderful things. Tell her that I hope her guests have a blast. Walk away slowly while glancing over my shoulder frequently.

If you did this to me, I would think you were creepy. Really. It would freak me out.

[bolt.]

Yeah, I don't think I'm being quite clear.

 

It's just nice to go to a park and have little ones grin and play contentedly, scrambling everywhere without a care in the world.

 

Therefore it is "less nice" to go to a park and have to run interference between children and nice things that they can't touch. Silently disappointed and sympathetic to my children and their (perfectly normal) desire to bounce in a house -- that isn't going to be fulfilled.

 

Of course it's just fine, it's lovely that someone is having a great party! Nonetheless, it has the potential to change things about "my" day. (Note, my children are no longer so young that it would matter. I'm projecting younger ages to try to get in to the scenario.)

 

Do you all really have young kids who would ignore it and carry on without the slightest effect, internal or external? My kids would get it, because I would explain it -- but that wouldn't stop them from having wishful feelings. Younger ones might need to be "helped" in the task of keeping away from things that don't belong to them.

[Guest submarines]

You seem to be confusing the ideas of "resentment" and disappointment.

 

I wouldn't resent it, and the hypothetical young children I'm imagining would be too young to have such a complex emotion. It's simply disappointing to see, "More fun thing over there, not for me." even if you understand it. It takes quite a bit of the fun out of running around on the ordinary playground equipment.

 

Of course I'd say, "It's nice that the kid is having a party and that I hope he has a lot of fun." -- It would still make *my* day less fun, because *my* toddlers and preschoolers wouldn't be having the kind of great-fun-park-day I had planned for them. They'd be having a, "But Mommy, I wish *I* had a bouncy house too!" kind of day. (Depending on the age, they might even be having the reaction where I'd need to run after them constantly to keep them out of the party zone, and/or having such a wealth of disappointment that park day needed to be over because they lacked the maturity to contain their emotions.)

 

I'm also not talking about "guilt" -- I'm talking about making a new friend and/or seeing if a stranger happened to be a generous type who would love to say "the more the merrier"... Yes, I overstated the idea of staring longingly, etc, but we may be from different cultures. I talk to other moms at the park. If another mom is doing party set up, it would be normal for me to offer help while striking up a conversation.

 

I love that they are having fun. There's no shame, no anger, no resentment. There's just vague annoyance at an unexpected opportunity to help my kids deal with wantfulness and impulse control, when, perhaps, I could have used a nice regular park outing that day.

 

:iagree:

 

Yep. This is how I feel as well. It is not a bit deal either way. A bit of annoyance that my outing can't go as planned, but I feel no resentment towards the party people, nor do I feel it is odd to chat to the party people and see how the situation unfolds.

 

[Farrar]

I can't relate to this kind of thinking at all.

 

There is the potential for people to be having fun (and perhaps fun not available to us) anywhere we go.  That doesn't mean our day has to be less fun.  Why wouldn't your kids still be able to have the fun park day you planned for them?  Assuming that the party isn't taking up the entire park (making it completely unavailable to you) you should still be able to go about your day.  Sure, it might be a distraction - but I'm not following the "we're now having less fun because we see a party we're not invited to" mentality.  

 

My kids probably could have handled being at the park and there being a bounce house there they couldn't play in when they were really small, but I have certainly known kids who would have struggled with it.  I mean, we're talking about toddlers and preschoolers.  They're not exactly rational beings.  And if the kids are struggling with it, then of course it's less fun for the parents.  It seems only natural to think to yourself that the outing would have worked out better without the giant no touch thing there.  Of course one tries to make the best of it and it will usually work out just fine if you have the right attitude.  But sometimes a kid is cranky and you end up with a "I WANT TO GO TO THE BOUNCE HOUSE!" tantrum.  Because that's life with three year olds.

 

We once left a park, not over a bounce house, but over a pile of new mulch that the park officials kept telling the children not to touch or go near for no apparent reason.  And some nannies were enforcing the rule and others weren't and the whole thing was just so annoying that I told the kids, who were maybe just turned three at the time, forget it, we're leaving.  The mulch was too exciting and they couldn't leave it alone and the atmosphere of hostility that had developed among the park staff and the nannies was just awkward.

[Hikin' Mama]

I agree with you, mommymilkies! The mentality of your friends blows me away. I don't see why anyone's day is ruined because they show up at the park and someone is having a party and didn't invite them, perfect strangers. I live in a small town and even if someone were having a party at our smallish park, there would still be room for other children to play. The entitlement mentality really chaps my hide! If I'm throwing a party, I'm sorry, but I'm not going to entertain people I didn't invite. The kids of these people will surely be the ones that come knocking on your door in a few years asking for money for their "educational" spring break trips to Disneyland.

[Hikin' Mama]

I can't wrap my head around that kind of thinking, either. Though I would love to know what the cops would have said if she actually had called. "Yes, is this 911? There's a woman with a bouncy house at the park and she won't share. Send all available units!"

I couldn't just like this, because you made me LOL!

[momto3innc]

We recently did a birthday party for my 8 year old ds at a local park.  It's huge, tons of equipment, tons of tables.  We didn't have bounce houses or anything, just food and the kids played on the equipment just like everyone else.  We took up 2 out of maybe 8 tables (no one was sitting at any other tables).  I was shocked by the behavior of other parents (kids I get).  While we ate we had one mom and her daughter sit on a nearby bench thing a couple feet away and just watch us.  They had a huge lunch box they were eating out of when we first got there so I really don't think it was a hunger issue...just weird and creepy.  I think she was hoping we'd invite her to join in...but it was a boy's party with mostly boys 3 or 4 years older than her daughter.  When I handed out party favors at the end (kids were taking them home, not playing with them there), I heard 3 different parents, say "Go ask her for some.  She'll give you one."  Total strangers.  One told them to get a cupcake too. 

I'm really not stingy, but while I had a little food leftover, I didn't have enough for the whole park!  And I had gotten "nicer" party favors and really didn't want to hand them to random strange children.  Overall, it just shocked me. We were outside of the main play area, so it wasn't like handing them out while everyone was watching at all...the tables are decently far away from the main play area. Can't fathom telling my kids to go do that.  And then keep asking.  And then stare at me angrily when I tell their child no (one dad).  Or keep waving and smiling at me (one mom). 

[*Inna*]

Well, that explains the couple of kids who crashed our birthday party at a park a few years ago. They kept shoving the little kids out of the line to hit a pinata. We had to take them to their parents who were sitting on a bench nearby and watching the whole thing. :confused1:

[Mommy22alyns]

I just want to be able to say I contributed to this thread.

[QuirkyKapers]

I wonder what your once upon a time friends would have done if it had been their children's party and strangers wanted to participate.  Bet they would have been appalled at the audacity. 

 

I have never had this situation happen when we have had public birthday parties.  It blows my mind that parents would actually expect their child to be able to eat food or receive items from the party when they weren't invited.  Sure, if you are at a park, your kids are going to notice the party.  If my children couldn't accept the party wasn't for them I would go somewhere else.  (We were never invited to join in a party with people we had no idea who they were either.)

 

 

[AimeeM]

I just want to say that I kind of *get* this.

My 4.5 year old son is that somewhat naive personality type - I could tell him that the party is for another child and that child's friends, and my son would respond, "he's my friend too!", because really and sincerely, he views all people as "friends he hasn't met yet". He very sincerely doesn't seem to understand those boundaries yet. He loves everyone, lol.

I most certainly would NOT ask to be included and would NEVER feel entitled to be included (or, rather, to have my child included), but I would probably leave the park if explaining and distracting didn't work with my son.

It has nothing to do with feeling entitled to anything, and everything to do with my child's specific personality.

You seem to be confusing the ideas of "resentment" and disappointment.

 

I wouldn't resent it, and the hypothetical young children I'm imagining would be too young to have such a complex emotion. It's simply disappointing to see, "More fun thing over there, not for me." even if you understand it. It takes quite a bit of the fun out of running around on the ordinary playground equipment.

 

Of course I'd say, "It's nice that the kid is having a party and that I hope he has a lot of fun." -- It would still make *my* day less fun, because *my* toddlers and preschoolers wouldn't be having the kind of great-fun-park-day I had planned for them. They'd be having a, "But Mommy, I wish *I* had a bouncy house too!" kind of day. (Depending on the age, they might even be having the reaction where I'd need to run after them constantly to keep them out of the party zone, and/or having such a wealth of disappointment that park day needed to be over because they lacked the maturity to contain their emotions.)

 

I'm also not talking about "guilt" -- I'm talking about making a new friend and/or seeing if a stranger happened to be a generous type who would love to say "the more the merrier"... Yes, I overstated the idea of staring longingly, etc, but we may be from different cultures. I talk to other moms at the park. If another mom is doing party set up, it would be normal for me to offer help while striking up a conversation.

 

I love that they are having fun. There's no shame, no anger, no resentment. There's just vague annoyance at an unexpected opportunity to help my kids deal with wantfulness and impulse control, when, perhaps, I could have used a nice regular park outing that day.

 

[Word Nerd]

Option not there:

 

Smile, shmooze and get chatty with the hostess. Bring over rocks to help hold her table cloths down. Ask the child's name and tell her your children's names and ages. Pause and stare longingly at the wonderful things. Tell her that I hope her guests have a blast. Walk away slowly while glancing over my shoulder frequently.

:blink: That would be odd, to say the least. I'd go as far as to say passive-aggressive.

[mommymilkies]

Do you all really have young kids who would ignore it and carry on without the slightest effect, internal or external? My kids would get it, because I would explain it -- but that wouldn't stop them from having wishful feelings. Younger ones might need to be "helped" in the task of keeping away from things that don't belong to them.

I have five kids and there are parties at the park nearly every time we go to one (we're rural-there's really nowhere else to go, not even a McD's play/party room!).  They don't bat an eye.  Sometimes they'll ask if a bounce house is open to everyone. I'll say no and they go right on playing.  I can't see how someone else having fun would ruin someone else's.  I certainly wouldn't go to a restaurant and insist that I eat the provided food for a dinner party reservation or crash a wedding to get some cake or catch the flowers.  I can see a kid feeling let down that they couldn't play, but you just have to teach them to be happy that they're at the park and to be happy for other people having fun?  Kind of like "that kid has a toy I want, they better give it to me". That's probably coming off wrong.  Someone want to finish lesson planning for me so I can grow some brain cells back?  :lol:

 

Maybe it's cultural or regional differences, but staring at someone's party hoping they will give you something would come off incredibly rude to me (Midwest/NE/SE roots here).  I also live in a pretty poor area and I've never had much money.  I know how much those parties cost.  A party even half that size would be a considerable financial burden and a rare treat for my child.  I can't imagine strangers inviting themselves in and taking food or people I don't know breaking the equipment I was responsible for.  I would just feel crushed.  So I would never invite myself or my children in to someone else's party. Do unto others and all. A stray child my kids befriended? Maybe.  People sitting there staring and trying to get invited? That would just be awkward at best.  It's someone's birthday, let's take them into consideration maybe? Would your actions in taking cake or staring at a birthday child/parent, or inviting yourself in to their inflatable make their birthday more enjoyable? That's why they're having a party, right? 

 

ETA: I hope I didn't come off as directing this part at you, in specific.  But at the kind of people who would call the police as a threat so they can play.  Those types.  I just don't get it. 

[bolt.]

Yeah, I took that joke too far. All I meant was that I'd see if she could use a hand, and be my normal friendly self briefly, then carry on with my day.

 

I'm normally friendly like that. The joke was just that she *might* be interested in an extra guest and/or an actual new friend. I wouldn't actually be creepy, stare, or make passive-aggressive comments.

 

(Admission of guilt: I actually have crashed an expensive birthday party by accident. I was invited to a venue on Saturday A, but got mixed up and came on Saturday B. At the venue were some people I knew -- from the same place that I knew the person who had invited us. I didn't know them very well, but because I recognized them, I grew increasingly confused. It wasn't the birthday I thought I had been coming to -- but I was clearly wrong about something. Was I wrong about the family??? I actually went to hide in the bathroom and *cry* because I couldn't make the situation make any sense. I came out prepared to ask at the desk if the family who had invited us was listed on some other day/time, and take my kids home. Alas, were were spotted and recognized by 'today's' birthday family, and laughingly pressed to join them -- after I explained the whole snafu of the Saturdays. They were definitely of the 'the more the merrier' mindset, and we had a lovely time. Of course I wasn't a total stranger, but, yeah, a lot of people are more welcoming and gracious snd ready to make friends than you {or I} expect them to be.)

[clarkacademy]

WOW is all I got I have nothing else to add just WOW!

[mommymilkies]

Yeah, I took that joke too far. All I meant was that I'd see if she could use a hand, and be my normal friendly self briefly, then carry on with my day.

 

I'm normally friendly like that. The joke was just that she *might* be interested in an extra guest and/or an actual new friend. I wouldn't actually be creepy, stare, or make passive-aggressive comments.

 

(Admission of guilt: I actually have crashed an expensive birthday party by accident. I was invited to a venue on Saturday A, but got mixed up and came on Saturday B. At the venue were some people I knew -- from the same place that I knew the person who had invited us. I didn't know them very well, but because I recognized them, I grew increasingly confused. It wasn't the birthday I thought I had been coming to -- but I was clearly wrong about something. Was I wrong about the family??? I actually went to hide in the bathroom and *cry* because I couldn't make the situation make any sense. I came out prepared to ask at the desk if the family who had invited us was listed on some other day/time, and take my kids home. Alas, were were spotted and recognized by 'today's' birthday family, and laughingly pressed to join them -- after I explained the whole snafu of the Saturdays. They were definitely of the 'the more the merrier' mindset, and we had a lovely time. Of course I wasn't a total stranger, but, yeah, a lot of people are more welcoming and gracious snd ready to make friends than you {or I} expect them to be.)

Awww.  That would be stressful! I think part of it here is how many of us are introverts? I'm a very shy introvert, so If someone I didn't know watched me, I would be immensely creeped out.  If we met at the park otherwise and talked, I'd likely invite you if I had extra food/supplies. This all makes me VERY happy I have all winter babies.   I hate parties, anyway.  Little close parties with friends and family that don't get too crazy are ok, but big events would probably have me on the edge, anyway!  :lol:

[Susan in TN]

Yikes!

 

This is a common issue here as we live across the street from a city park with a pavilion that is frequently used for parties and church groups. We have occasionally wandered into a party unawares, but once we catch on, we say happy birthday to the birthday person if appropriate and then make our way to another part of the park. Our rule is that our kids can play at the public playground equipment (which is near the pavilion) provided that the entire area is not being used for the party. If the party has gravitated to the bike path around the creek, then we ride our bikes somewhere else - it's a big park.

 

No one is allowed to go to the park during Girl Scout week except "after hours" and NO ONE is allowed to use the Girl Scout Camp port-a-potties, period. I don't care if they look cool.

[SKL]

Maybe the people "agreeing" with her were afraid to show their true feelings.  Or just having fun with the whole thing, but they'd act differently in the actual situation.

 

Of course it is disappointing to children to find that there is a fun party that they are not invited to.  Too bad.  I've had that conversation with my kids many times.  It sucks from their perspective, but I would hope adults would see it from the host parents' perspective.  I sure hope people don't expect me to include everyone in the vicinity when I do something for my kids.

 

Your neighbor sounds like a bona fide nut.  ;)  I have a few acquaintances who shock me like that at times.  At least it keeps life interesting.  LOL.

[Cafdog]

Wow.  Just wow.  

[Word Nerd]

Come on. Fess up if you would take food from a stranger's park party!

[SKL]

I probably would have taken food from a stranger's park party when I was a little kid, unsupervised (as was normal in those days), and it seemed like there was enough to go around.  In fact, I probably did - invited and not.  I can only hope my kids know better - but maybe they'd do the same if I wasn't around....

[kitten18]

We recently did a birthday party for my 8 year old ds at a local park. It's huge, tons of equipment, tons of tables. We didn't have bounce houses or anything, just food and the kids played on the equipment just like everyone else. We took up 2 out of maybe 8 tables (no one was sitting at any other tables). I was shocked by the behavior of other parents (kids I get). While we ate we had one mom and her daughter sit on a nearby bench thing a couple feet away and just watch us. They had a huge lunch box they were eating out of when we first got there so I really don't think it was a hunger issue...just weird and creepy. I think she was hoping we'd invite her to join in...but it was a boy's party with mostly boys 3 or 4 years older than her daughter. When I handed out party favors at the end (kids were taking them home, not playing with them there), I heard 3 different parents, say "Go ask her for some. She'll give you one." Total strangers. One told them to get a cupcake too.

I'm really not stingy, but while I had a little food leftover, I didn't have enough for the whole park! And I had gotten "nicer" party favors and really didn't want to hand them to random strange children. Overall, it just shocked me. We were outside of the main play area, so it wasn't like handing them out while everyone was watching at all...the tables are decently far away from the main play area. Can't fathom telling my kids to go do that. And then keep asking. And then stare at me angrily when I tell their child no (one dad). Or keep waving and smiling at me (one mom).

Wow, that is bizarre.