TexasRachel Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 So suppose someone is watching your kids while you're at the doctors. Do you go out to eat after? Or come straight home? Add in an hour drive each way to the total time you're gone as well if that makes a difference. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slartibartfast Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 If the amount of time was agreed on then sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penelope Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 I might grab a sandwich to go to bring home, or go through the coffee drive thru, but no, I wouldn't go out to eat. Is this a pregnant person? Did she get caught out a long time without a plan and needed to eat? That's a scenario where I could see needing to stop, especially with a long drive. But I probably would just eat in my car or a quick place, not a sit down dinner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigMamaBird Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 When I've watched my friend's kids she asks me if I mind if she does a few errands and I don't have a problem with it. But it might be polite to ask. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Is it time to eat? Do I need to feed my son before driving an hour home because he will chew my arm off, if I don't? My son's specialists in NC were around 90 minutes from our house. We would usually get a quick lunch before we came home. If someone had been watching my other kids, maybe we would have done drive though instead. I wouldn't go out to The Cheesecake Factory, wait an hour, take an hour or more to eat, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T'smom Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 It would depend. If it was well within the time frame they expected me back, I might. If I was paying them for a certain amount of time, sure. If they were doing me a favor, I would not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 depends on who is doing me the favor. If MIL were doing it, she'd probably tell me before I left to be sure to take some extra time for myself. Someone else? Going out might be getting a sandwich at little cafe takeout and eating it on the drive home and I would consider that a treat. Considering the hour drive each way, plus appointment and waiting room time, you are likely to be gone a minimum of three hours--they could be really hard on someone who is "doing a favor". So, I'd watch how I used the time carefully. In most cases this is the wrong time to treat myself to time alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in FL. Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 I would If it fit in the time frame that was agreed upon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 If it was a meal time and a quick sort of restaurant (or intended to be) sure. Also, if it was high-stress and the person might have actually needed to collect herself -- for sure. And, if I maybe gave a very strong impression that 'it's no trouble at all!' -- Or maybe if s/he had missed the prior meal due to getting ready for the apt, and mentioned it. Otherwise, I'd expect a call for the friend to check in before she made her decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellydon Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Straight to the doctor and back only. I would never go do something else if I asked someone to watch my kids while I go to a doctor's appointment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excelsior! Academy Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Agreeing with the others. A quick bite around meal times or drive-through would be okay. A sit down dinner without pre-arranging would be a bit much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BakersDozen Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Straight to the doctor and back only. This. I had to stop watching kids because a number of my friends took my offer as not only doctor appointment but lunch and errands afterward as well. They usually timed their outings such that I got to feed their kids, too. If it's a favor that is being done, there and back is what I expect and would do as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 Watching kids is generally no trouble to me, so I'd be happy to have allowed a friend a lunch and errands in with his/her errands -- but I wouldn't like to be waiting, and surprised at the friend taking "lisence" without letting me know what they wanted to accomplish and how long it would take, and asking if the whole thing was ok with me. It would be, but it's important to talk about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 If I'm paying the babysitter and it's within the time frame I gave her? Sure. A friend doing me an emergency favor? No. Grab something and go if food is necessary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SJ. Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 It all depends on who is doing the babysitting and the arrangements. If I am paying and it is within the agreed upon time then sure, if it is a friend doing me a favor then probably not unless there was an agreed upon end time and it fits within the constraints and if I give friend a call to confirm it is ok. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mytwomonkeys Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 i might go through a drive-thru, but i wouldn't go to a sit-down restaurant. it sounds nice! it just wouldn't cross my mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 If someone was doing me a favor, I wouldn't want to impose any more than necessary, so I would go to my appointment and head straight home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 I wouldn't want to go to a sit down restaurant alone anyway. I suppose I would do this is my medical appointment was something serious and I needed to recompose myself, but if it were that serious I suspect the person doing the babysitting favor would be privy to some of what's going on and I may have told them up front that there would likely be delay in my return. I can't think of any other scenario where you would go out and for a doctor's appointment and impose further by having a sit down meal to yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soror Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 Depends. If it was my bff and I knew she didn't have anything going on then I probably would but that is also because knowing her she would want me to take extra time. If it was the in-laws or my parents I'd likely ask them ahead of time if I could run some errands before or after as I never ever get time to myself. If it was someone I paid then I would do whatever we agreed upon and if it was within the time window I would. If it was someone else and a favor I might hit a drive through but not go in anywhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aspasia Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 I just did this last week. A neighbor watched my kids while I went to a prenatal appointment (just down the street, certainly not an hour). On the way home, I stopped and grabbed a Subway (I LOVE sandwiches, especially when I'm pregnant) to take home and eat after I picked up the kids. It took five minutes, quite literally. I certainly would not have sat down to eat it. When people watch my kids for free, I am incredibly anxious about getting back as quickly as possible. I don't want to take advantage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 I would not go out to eat if someone was doing babysitting for me. If I was hungry, I would run through a drive through or eat a Larabar from my purse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*LC Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 When my husband had doctor's appointments that we both attended, we always had a date lunch. It was a chance to talk about what the doctor said and to destress before picking up the kids. The appointments were usually an hour or more away, but they were closer to our babysitting relatives. Some of the appointments were long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 When my husband had doctor's appointments that we both attended, we always had a date lunch. It was a chance to talk about what the doctor said and to destress before picking up the kids. The appointments were usually an hour or more away, but they were closer to our babysitting relatives. Some of the appointments were long. We did the same. The appts were serious and there was a lot to discuss. But we only did it when we'd agreed with the babysitter well in advance, and with lots of checking in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 When my husband had doctor's appointments that we both attended, we always had a date lunch. It was a chance to talk about what the doctor said and to destress before picking up the kids. The appointments were usually an hour or more away, but they were closer to our babysitting relatives. Some of the appointments were long. We did the same. The appts were serious and there was a lot to discuss. But we only did it when we'd agreed with the babysitter well in advance, and with lots of checking in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 If it's my appt I would not go out to eat. It sounds like this appt would be at least 3 hours--does anyone really get to see the doc at their appt time? Anyway, I'd want to get back so as not to take advantage of a friend's generosity. If I'm watching your dc I'd expect to be asked, since the time away is so long, if I'd mind that you stop for a bite. If you ask, I don't mind helping out. But to just go out without telling me you'll be out a bit longer . . . I wouldn't appreciate that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 Depends. If I'm paying, and my children are okay with me being away for son long, then sure, why not. If it is a friend doing me a favor, then not without telling / asking my friend first, and probably just a quick bite. If I'm babysitting for a friend, should I be upset that instead of being stuck in the waiting room for an extra hour, my friend actually went out to enjoy herself and destress? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted November 6, 2013 Share Posted November 6, 2013 I might pop through a drive through or grab something at a deli counter and then eat in my car while I am driving - but I would NOT go to a restaurant to eat unless we had agreed beforehand that I would also be doing so. eta: the babysitter also has a time schedule to keep - and adding more time for her without consulting her is an inconvenience and unfair to her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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