Speaking of extending grace -- let's talk about how you are in traffic.

[Doran]

In a recent post, I described having to endure the traffic onto and on Long Island this past weekend. It was a madhouse. The entire trip from MD to NY was fraught with traffic jams and crazy drivers. Upon our return, I learned of a terrible accident on the Chesapeake Bay Bridge in which a tractor trailer went over the edge and plunged into the water below. A friend said it took her eight hours to get home from a trip that would normally have taken her about an hour and a half.

 

These are times when I believe a person's true character comes out. This and when your plane flight gets canceled. In life, I'd like to think I'm better at exhibiting patience than is my dh. But, put me in the car, and I turn into The Terminator. I rant. I fume. I swear under my breath (or not). I have a sudden urge to wish for semi-automatic weapons. It's not pretty.

 

I was in utter disbelief this weekend when, as we sat waiting in snaking train of cars at a toll booth, a driver came up from the back of the line into the empty lane alongside of us and proceeded to wheedle his way in. (Three toll lanes were closed just next to us, and had been so for as long as we'd been sitting there, inching along - no sudden change for any drivers just arriving - thus, there was a big gap between our lane and the next one over.) So, this meat head just drives up like he's got a "Get Out Of Jail Free" Monopoly pass and big halo to boot. I'm shaking my head, gritting my teeth, pressing on my imaginary horn, and imagining all manner of un-hallowed names for him. Dh gives a mild "Humph", and lets the guy go ahead of him in line!!!!

 

I soon realized (my one talent - I recover quickly from demonic behavior) that dh was right. There was no point in locking the guy out. So what if he ended up one car ahead of us? We weren't in a hurry. We had no deadline. And, what if we did? What the hay is one car length anyhow?!

 

Extending grace. It has a place everywhere. :001_smile:

[cin]

Let's just say that my dd knows NOT to say 'old fart' 'gray hair' (as in, it's a gray hair), stupid idiot and Freakin Moron (or maroon...we Love to destroy the English langauge in our house!). They also know not to use the phrase 'What The...." and any word that follows it.:D

[Tammyla]

Traffic doesn't bother me unless someone is being reckless.

[Jennifer in MI]

Oh man. I know that your dh was right, but I HATE it when my dh does this - which is ALL the time!!! Here in the Detroit area we're having a TON of construction where one or two lanes are closed. You always get the jerk who comes up in the closed lane until he absolutely has to get over. Dh is the one who lets him in. Grrrrr . . .

 

As far as extending grace, I'm much better about this when I know the person or see them in person. I can forgive the nasty cashier or my sister. I guess it's because I have a "relationship" with them - even if it's just one in passing. But, in the car - that person is someone I don't know face to face. It's just harder to forgive that way!

[Heather in the Kootenays]

Good for your dh and good for you for recognizing it.

 

In our house, dh has suddenly taken to similar demonic behavior. He doesn't recover as quickly as you obviously did.

[Quiver0f10]

I am terrible in traffic and it's an area I am working on right now :blushing: It's been my hardest thing to adjust to with living in a city.

[JFSinIL]

I try and imagine how many speeding tickets, etc. someone like has had had and will get if that is how they typically drive.

 

Then I imagine - what if he is a doctor trying to get to the hospital to do surgery to save a life....or feels sick and has GOT to make it to a toilet...or is late for an IEP meeting since his child with autism wouldn't cooperate....

[sdWTMer]

But, put me in the car, and I turn into The Terminator. I rant. I fume. I swear under my breath (or not). I have a sudden urge to wish for semi-automatic weapons. It's not pretty.

 

 

Me too! Luckily, I don't :auto: much. And when we go out my dh drives. But, yes the :mad: in me can rare it's ugly head! Watch out!

 

:D

[sdWTMer]

Was that too many smilies in my post?!? ;)

[percytruffle]

 

[/b]I soon realized (my one talent - I recover quickly from demonic behavior) that dh was right. There was no point in locking the guy out. So what if he ended up one car ahead of us? We weren't in a hurry. We had no deadline. And, what if we did? What the hay is one car length anyhow?!

 

Extending grace. It has a place everywhere. :001_smile:

 

 

Well, actually, I grew up in a largish city where this type of driving behavior predominated. If I had let just that one car in there would have been thirty more to follow. I have actually seen trucks pull out half way into the other lane so that nobody could get by them and pull that stunt. While it serves you no useful purpose to become angry, it also serves no useful purpose to enable those who would take advantage and drive unfairly. It always make my heart glad to see someone's plan to get ahead at all cost foiled by someone else who just wants everyone to play by the rules.

 

I actually refused to let someone in line from a side aisle at the airport the other day. She knew perfectly well where the line was to head to the gate to pay and leave and she made the choice to try to cut the line. I wouldn't budge and neither would those in front of or in back of me. I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with expecting others to abide by the "rules of the road'. I think our lowered expectations of people in this country have lead to this type of behavior. I am all for empathy if the situation warrants, but empathy for someone just so they can get ahead is wrong. The ends do not justify the means.

 

I try not to get overly emotional about it, but it does bug me. You have to learn to let it go, but you also have to be an aware driver who is wise to these tactics. It is a fine balance.

[Desert Rat]

I loathe traffic! That's why I leave so dang early because I hate feeling rushed. It's not worth it. There's a road I take all the time that's 25 mph and a favorite place for police to hang out yet it seems I always get the guy behind me revving the engine and riding my tail. I just pull over and let him pass. Let him get the ticket, right?

On a sad note, I don't rush anymore because my mom (an RN) and I were driving and witnessed a very bad accident right in front of us. The driver stopped breathing and my mom and I performed CPR. She later died. She was 24 and newly married (just as I was at the time) and had her whole life ahead of her. Oh, and she was speeding because she was late for work. Not worth it I say. I learned a very valuable lesson that day.

[OnTheBrink]

Most of the time, I try to give the other person the benefit of the doubt. I know I've driven in what appeared to be a reckless way when I had a sick child who needed a potty, or I needed one myself, and have been thankful that someone didn't block me out.

 

However, I'm not always as patient as I'd like to be. I'm working on it. I do get firey angry at drivers who don't have their children restrained properly or do stupid things like read books or yack on the phone animatedly and put the rest of us at risk of their inattention to their driving.

[Kathleen in VA]

I.hate.driving. I didn't want to get my license - I was 21 before I actually got my license. Now I have to drive (something about getting from here to there) and I hate it.

 

The first 12 years of our marriage we had one car. I was fine with that. Then my boys wanted to do stuff and go places. We got a car (freebie) from some friends moving out of state. I drove just when I needed to.

 

A couple of years ago I got a pt job and had to drive 3 days a week during rush hour traffic. I was sure I would end up being a headline in our local paper, "Mother of 5 Rams Car, Claiming She Was Cut Off."

 

Since that re-initiation into the driving world, I have learned to back off and take it in stride, but, whew!, it sure wasn't easy. It was a very spiritual lesson for me as I am pretty sure Jesus would never drive like I did - very, very humiliating to learn to control myself at 47 when I had been harping on my children all these years to learn some self-control.

 

I still hate to drive, but I am much more relaxed now and figure I will get there when I get there. Learning to be a more gracious driver has also helped me to be more gracious in other areas. Life's too short, kwim?

[Happy]

I want to send e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e. to traffic school. :glare:

 

There are two busy four way stops close to us. You'd be surprised how many people do not know how to handle them. Sheesh. Get off the cell phone and pay attention, please.

 

There is a particular intersection where people often don't realize the left and center lanes are a two lane turn. They'll drift from their lane into the center lane as if the entire road belongs to them. That gets me because it is so dangerous.

 

Don't even get me started on those who think just because they have big vehicles they don't have to stay on their side of the road. See those lines....don't cross them, especially if you are coming right at me.

 

I've taken to honking more. That's not a real Texas thing to do, but I've driven in New York City and they say a lot with their horns. :D At least if I honk at someone drifting from one lane to the next, cutting in front of me, or blatantly going out of turn at a stop sign, maybe I've made them think.

[Doran]

I try not to get overly emotional about it, but it does bug me. You have to learn to let it go, but you also have to be an aware driver who is wise to these tactics. It is a fine balance.

 

 

He grew up on L.I. and lived for a time w/ his grandmother in Brooklyn, so being an assertive driver is something he can do well. I guess he just figured that in *that* situation, there was no point. The dude with the pawn shop halo was going to get into that line come BLEEP or high water, so why not in front of us, you know? I do understand your point, but there are times when it's just not important. Not letting the guy in isn't going to change his behavior. Too bad we can't conference call the other folks in line and agree on a game plan. "Okay, tighten up people. Let's show this jerk who's boss." :lol:

 

Speaking of holding my own, I no longer drive onto or off Long Island because of the one occasion when I tried to hold my ground. I was following dh in a separate vehicle (this was shortly after we'd married and we were jockeying cars from place to place). I did not have my own directions, so I was completely dependent on staying with dh, despite the heavy traffic. There was a bottleneck at a merge situation, so dh let two or three cars come in ahead of him in order to "justify" me not letting anyone in between us. Lucky me ended up next to a complete idiot. I held my ground and did not let him in, but when he did get in, one car back, he came around beside me and tried to run me off the road!! Next thing you know, there's a road race going on between dh, in his car, and this crazy guy in his car, with dh trying to "return the favor". There I am, this neophite city driver, screaming at the top of my lungs in my own car. I'm sure it doesn't take much to imagine that scene -- like something right out of a movie, I tell you! :D

[elegantlion]

What a thread! My dh is not the most patient man behind the wheel. He hates to be tailgated, however and does not hide that fact. When ds was little, about 4, we were headed to my parents. We got tailgated on the highway and dh had had enough. He muttered a few words, flipped the bird to the car behind us and yelled "Back off" in a very scary voice.

 

When we got to my parents, ds was sitting on the kitchen counter talking to my mom. He says......"Hey Mama, guess what, this means back off." and flipped my mom off. We all tried not to laugh and dh wanted to hide for the rest of the day. Classic childhood memory.

 

 

I tend to be fairly patient. I'm not in a hurry to get anywhere, however I'm a very defensive driver. In the last two months I've almost been in two accidents caused by elderly women drivers. One started to turn into the wrong parking lot and instead of merging back into her lane decided to start head on in my direction at 30mph. She had to drive on the curb to avoid me and I had to pull of the road to collect myself.

 

Another was a woman attempting to merge onto a 60mph freeway at 25mph. The merge lane was stopped and she came within a few feet of being rear-ended by a tractor trailer. He would have bounced right into my lane.

 

I love to drive, it's one of my great freedoms. I have decided since those two incidents when I am old and not as aware I will gladly hang it up and find some other way to get around without endangering other people.

[tibbyl]

I *always* keep reading material, either hard copies or audio.

 

As for the piggy me-first drivers who push their way to front of line, the basest among us having a way of rising to top/front. My choice is not to do battle in a car.

[PiCO]

I grew up in the northeast, so I learned to drive in rat race conditions. Aggressive, swearing at everyone, not letting anyone in, cutting my way in without a turn signal (because if you used your turn signal, people would shut you out.) The first person to stop at a red light was "chicken".

 

Then I moved to the midwest- people thought I was insane! I learned a calmer approach. Now I live in Colorado, and about half the people here are calm, and half are not. I stay calm and let people in, etc.- unless they are being jerks. Tailgaiting me? I'll slow down w/out using the brakes until you back off. Trying to weave in and out of traffic? I'm going to casually block you off if you try to weave past me. Oh, and I actually stop at yellow lights here. Mainly because there's no delay between my red and your green.

[Crissy]

I let other folks in front of me and I drive (close to) the speed limit. I don't change lanes with out signaling, and I am a fairly calm driver.

 

But I have been known to blurt out the words, "You IDIOT!" when other drivers (or bike riders) do something ridiculously dangerous.:blushing:

[KAR120C]

Okay okay, I just hate the idiots ;)

 

I know there's no point in blocking someone who's being a jerk, but it makes me feel better. So I do. What really irritates me more than anything is that I drive a very reasonable speed -- not slow, but not breakneck -- generally about 5mph over the speed limit unless I know it's a place where the speed limit is already pushing it (like a blind curve). And invariably the jerks that want me to let them back in are the ones that passed me because I wasn't going fast enough. There's one stretch of road here where the speed limit drops from 45 to 35 because you're approaching a blind curve with a stoplight on the other side, and frequently the traffic has lined up to the point that as soon as you can see ahead there's a car RIGHTINFRONTOFYOU. So being a sensible person, I slow down to 35 as soon as the sign is there. And some jerk always has to come screaming up behind me at 50-something, zip around on the left, come around the curve way too fast and stomp on his brakes because he's about to plow right into someone. There are numerous matching skidmarks to attest to the frequency of this particular scenario. :glare: And of course after showing everyone what a moron he is, he wants back in because he was planning to turn right. Well too bad. :mad:

 

In almost any other setting I definitely try to err on the side of sympathy, but when people are risking their lives and everyone else's and then want you to allow it, I say they should be thankful the only consequences they're having to live with are the inconvenience, and not the accident they very nearly caused. Now if it's a regular merge and people are behaving themselves then of course everyone gets in and I don't care where I fall in the line -- it's only when someone is cheating, and especially cheating in an unsafe manner, that I feel compelled to communicate my disapproval.

 

The one incident that really had me cussing though was a guy who leaned on his horn because I had opted to stop at a red light instead of trying to make it (and exactly how was he planning to get through the same light when it was already red for me and he was a whole car length later??) My first thought was that I should be sympathetic because maybe he was late for something important, or having some emergency (although the hospital is in the other direction...) Nope. He spent a whole light cycle gunning his engine and gesticulating because he was desperate to get to Burger King. :001_huh: Burger King???? He wanted me to run a red light so he could have an overcooked hamburger???? Gah!!!!

[Kathleen in VA]

My first thought was that I should be sympathetic because maybe he was late for something important, or having some emergency

 

We always say, "I guess he must really need to get to the potty," or "Should've have gone to the bathroom before he left the house," whenever we encounter impatient folks like this.:D

 

I must add, too, that tailgaters are going to have an especially hot spot in the "bad place" when they get there.;) That is still an area I have issues with. I want a bumper sticker that says, "I speed for no one" or "Speed for you? I don't even know you!"

[ticklbee]

I am rarely out in morning rush hour traffic but last week I was having my car repaired and had to be at the shop early.

 

So, I'm driving down a major road on my way to the highway doing about 60-65. I look in my rear view mirror and there is an older lady right on my bumper. While still accelerating I tap on the brake with my other foot just to make my brake lights go on to warn her she's too close. Well, she starts waving her arms at me telling me to get out of the way.

 

Usually I do just get out of the way...road rage can be a dangerous thing. We had one guy here shoot another guy because he was mad about the way he changed lanes in front of him. Crazy stuff. But this woman so annoyed me, I just stayed where I was until I had to get over for the turnoff onto the highway. I don't think she was too happy.

[Elaine]

I really despise traffic. And, I take it personally when I am courteous to someone and they don't do "the wave." Hello, moron, I let you in front of me and now you're going to do 40 in a 65?? At least do "the wave.":glare:

[Parrothead]

I generally don't mind being at a standstill on the interstate. I'm fairly patient then. It is when traffic isn't moving for any reason that sets the Irish off. I mean really the road is clear 4 miles ahead, but %$^( is only traveling at 12 mph. He needs to GET OFF THE ROAD! so I can get on with my life.

[Remudamom]

Gah. I make Sawyer sound like a kindergartener.

[percytruffle]

Someone tried to run me off the road once too. I had to pass a slow car on a two lane freeway and I apparently didn't pass that person at a fast enough rate for the idiot behind me. After I was past the car and so was he, he pushed me sideways to the point where my right wheels and half of my car were in the breakdown lane, out of spite. We were the only three cars on that part of the road. there was no traffic, he was just an a**. Perhaps that is why I despise it so much when drivers don't follow traffic curtesy rules. I have experienced road rage. I certainly don't try to excalate anyone to the point of rage, but I don't like being bullied either.

[KAR120C]

We always say, "I guess he must really need to get to the potty," or "Should've have gone to the bathroom before he left the house," whenever we encounter impatient folks like this.:D

Lack of planning on his part doesn't constitute an emergency on my part! LOL But it does make for an amusing mental image. ;)

[bettyandbob]

actually Chelmsford --northwest of Boston. It was 11 hours up and 12 hours back. Doran and I were probably at the same toll plaza in Delaware. I really couldn't believe Delaware. It should take 30 minutes to get through that state on 95. I think were were there 2 + hours.

 

That said, I can usually do long distance driving, even in back ups without getting uptight. I guess I figure I set aside the day for this. The kids were doing ok. So, we just put up with it and get through it. I was a little frustrated with how long it took--everybody and their brother assured me that Boston was an 8 hour drive. We sure weren't alone, the MD rest area at 8:30 on Sunday night was like the mall the last weekend before Christmas.

 

Now, my day to day driving in No. Va. is another thing. I often get tense. I think this area promotes tension and it is said to have the worst traffic. The DC commute I think is rated worst in the country ahead of LA now. I have to drive a lot to get to my part time jobs and kids' stuff. People are rude. I keep the windows up and shout at everyone. I do have to control exactly what I shout--dd asked what curse words were and ds said "listen to mommy when she drives." I'm working on that. I am getting a lot better simply because ds is 13 and I talk to him most of the time I'm in the car about all the decisions I make on the road--prep for his driving.

[King Alfred Academy]

Let's just say that I don't let my son ride in those car carts at the grocery store anymore. A lady stopped her cart in front of us to look at something and he honked the horn and said, "Get out of the way, dude." She looked at me and I said, "I don't know where he gets it?!" :001_unsure:

[Guest]

DH is a much calmer driver than I am. However, what gets us both riled up is 4 way stops. We live in a smaller town that is still developing, so there are a bunch of 4 way stops. NO ONE, and I mean NO ONE does them correctly. I told my husband on Sunday that maybe WE were the ones who don't do them right. Nah, couldn't be.

[Rosie_0801]

I view traffic jams as the world's way of making me practise patience. I figure if I am patient about them, the world will not need to create traffic jams around me for a while.

:)

Rosie

[Amy loves Bud]

I grew up in the northeast, so I learned to drive in rat race conditions. Aggressive, swearing at everyone, not letting anyone in, cutting my way in without a turn signal (because if you used your turn signal, people would shut you out.)

 

:lol: Bud (from New Jersey) says using your turn signal is a sign of weakness. He makes me very nervous.

[RoughCollie]

When I drive, I pretend that all the drivers in the cars around me are someone I love, and I treat them accordingly.

 

I don't usually have a problem with other drivers when I'm in my SUV, anyway. But when I have DH's car (the wimpmobile) it's a different story.

 

I listen to classical music during traffic jams. It keeps me calm.

 

I did have one transgression. This lady in a little car was angling to get into a long line of traffic at the toll booth. I was in my SUV and she wanted to get in line ahead of me. No problem. Then she shot me a bird! Don't ask me why because I don't know.

 

The line started moving and she tried to squeeze in front of me, and oops, I hit her fender on purpose. I was in a nobody messes with me mood and didn't appreciate her attitude. She got out of there, and I chased her down the turnpike for miles, and I called the state police on her. It was fun.

 

Maybe she learned not to shoot birds at people driving vehicles that are bigger than hers.

 

RC

[brehon]

I want to send e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e. to traffic school. :glare:

 

There are two busy four way stops close to us. You'd be surprised how many people do not know how to handle them. Sheesh. Get off the cell phone and pay attention, please.

<snip>

Don't even get me started on those who think just because they have big vehicles they don't have to stay on their side of the road. See those lines....don't cross them, especially if you are coming right at me.

 

Can I have an AMEN?!?!

 

My behavior/emotional state tends to depend on whether or not I'm driving the ambulance. Off duty -- I get as frustrated as the next person and am apt to perchance utter that which tender ears should not hear. (Well, I don't think my eldest ds & dd have such tender ears anymore. I recently heard my ds7 say "D***!" in just the same manner as a certain parental unit who shall remain nameless:blush:) I don't, however, drive any more aggressively.

 

On duty -- whole 'nother can of worms. For better or worse, I get really upset at drivers who don't move.outta.my.way when I have the whoo-whoo's on. Note that I said "don't", not "can't". Or even better, those who try to get out of the way by pulling right in front of my ambulance. Yes, I can't tell you how many times I've seen (and fortunately avoided -- thank you CEVO) drivers who pulled from the right lane into the left lane. Let's just say that I'm very thankful that (a)we don't have loudspeakers where I could address the public [oh, the temptation...] and (b)the ambulance isn't bugged because I think my boss might not appreciate my (and my partner's) creative use of the English language.

 

My partner and I have drawn up detailed plans for the type of ambulance we'd like to drive. It involves having 3-man crews instead of the usual 2. The third medic would be needed to man the gun turret which would be placed on top of the box. The tail gunner would then be responsible for shooting cars who don't obey the laws regarding yielding to emergency vehicles. Usually, these cars would be shot with paintballs thereby allowing local law enforcement to issue tickets. Sometimes, however, live fire might be used. You just never know...

[jonesloonybin]

My partner and I have drawn up detailed plans for the type of ambulance we'd like to drive. It involves having 3-man crews instead of the usual 2. The third medic would be needed to man the gun turret which would be placed on top of the box. The tail gunner would then be responsible for shooting cars who don't obey the laws regarding yielding to emergency vehicles. Usually, these cars would be shot with paintballs thereby allowing local law enforcement to issue tickets. Sometimes, however, live fire might be used. You just never know...

 

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

 

That's great..:lol:

 

I think there are some crazy drivers here...man I hate driving on the hwy.

 

Another peeve of mine is the tailgating. I will usually drive 5 miles over the limit (if it is safe) but I still get people right up on my tail. If they don't back off then I slow down and will drive the EXACT speed limit. Then I just turn up the music and enjoy the ride. If you are nice I will drive the limit +5, if not then tough! DH always wants to tap his brakes when they tailgate..but I have to remind him that when kids are in the car you must have their safety first.

 

Or how about you are driving on a 2+ lane hwy/freeway and you are just passing an exit when someone will come shooting across all the lanes and then drive on the grass/curb/etc. to get the exit...the one that they already PASSED. Like the world will end if you have to take the next exit that is like 1 mile ahead. :glare:

[Doran]

I really despise traffic. And, I take it personally when I am courteous to someone and they don't do "the wave." Hello, moron, I let you in front of me and now you're going to do 40 in a 65?? At least do "the wave.":glare:

 

 

I am forever telling people what they *should* be doing. :001_smile:

 

"Yo, dude, a turn signal might be in order there."

 

"So, am I going to celebrate my next birthday before we make it all the way up this road or what?"

 

"Do you have some queer attraction to my license plate, or do you just like riding up my backend like that?"

 

Mind you, most of this is done under my breath or behind closed windows.

 

But today -- I couldn't help myself -- I shouted out my open window at a herd of tourists in my town who were jay walking about 15' from a legitimate cross walk. Man, that gets my ire up. I mean they are clearly not handicapped in any way, except that when they go on vacation they must decide to leave their brains behind. But do they walk the 15' to the place with the snazzy white criss-cross lines and the signs that say Stop for Pedestrians? Nooooo!!!! They want to get to the store that's right there, so they have to cross right there. I shouted out my open window at them, "Use the cross walk!" They didn't listen. I saw them cross anyway, stopping traffic. Morons. That's a good word.

 

Breathing. In out. In out.

 

 

 

:lol:

[RoughCollie]

It's against the law to use the crosswalks in Boston, unless the light is red for walkers.

[Doran]

It's against the law to use the crosswalks in Boston, unless the light is red for walkers.

 

 

Traffic is required to STOP for pedestrians in a crosswalk, and there are no lights. The walkways are in the middle of the road, scattered up and down the main street that runs through this popular little town. Still, folks insist on crossing wherever they please. Maybe they're from Boston and just don't get it!? :D

[pqr]

OK I am going to be the bad guy here. I never let people in, who are trying to sneak up the side lane (unless it is obvious that there is an emergency). This is a time when I will not teach my children to be "meek," they need to learn to stand up for themselves, and others, when someone tries to take advantage of them. (Homeschooling is not only at home)

 

Now for the unpopular bit. I get just as angry when other people let them in. In my view, which I know will be challenged, you have no right to let someone unfairly cut into traffic.

 

1. If I am in spot 10, I do not agree to fall back to spot 11 because someone 6 spots up decides to let someone in.

2. The only way to stop this behavior is for no one to allow people to cut in line.

3. Civilized or genteel behavior sometimes dictates that we stand up to those who are less so.

4. The guy in line who is also late but does not push ahead should not be made even later because someone further up decides not to defend the rights of the guy further behind.

 

In short, as a community we need to defend the rights of one and other. By letting people cut into a line we are being greedy. Simply because I am not in a hurry (or do not want to go through the effort of ensuring that no one cuts into the line) does not mean the guy behind me is not and it is imperative that I respect his behavior by not letting others in ahead of him.

 

I await return fire:-)

[Doran]

OK I am going to be the bad guy here. I never let people in, who are trying to sneak up the side lane (unless it is obvious that there is an emergency). This is a time when I will not teach my children to be "meek," they need to learn to stand up for themselves, and others, when someone tries to take advantage of them. (Homeschooling is not only at home)

 

Now for the unpopular bit. I get just as angry when other people let them in. In my view, which I know will be challenged, you have no right to let someone unfairly cut into traffic.

 

1. If I am in spot 10, I do not agree to fall back to spot 11 because someone 6 spots up decides to let someone in.

2. The only way to stop this behavior is for no one to allow people to cut in line.

3. Civilized or genteel behavior sometimes dictates that we stand up to those who are less so.

4. The guy in line who is also late but does not push ahead should not be made even later because someone further up decides not to defend the rights of the guy further behind.

 

In short, as a community we need to defend the rights of one and other. By letting people cut into a line we are being greedy. Simply because I am not in a hurry (or do not want to go through the effort of ensuring that no one cuts into the line) does not mean the guy behind me is not and it is imperative that I respect his behavior by not letting others in ahead of him.

 

I await return fire:-)

 

 

I completely understand your view. But, it's one of those that is so impractical that I can't see even trying. First, you'll never know whether the guy butting in has a problem with incontinence, or whether his mother is dying across the bridge, or whether he just had bad training. You'll never be able to discern whether that person's "hurry" is justifiable or not. And, you'll never stop the charitable people, or the meek (who are planning to inherit the earth, so just you try and prevent them!), or the wishy-washy like my husband who can be ruthless one minute and carefree the next. Any of them can bump you back in line with a wave of benevolence to the jerk they let in, and what does it really matter to you? Seriously? This is my point. Is it worth the aggravation (unless you're stronger than me and you actually don't feel the bile rising up in your gut when you grit your teeth against the intruding guy who is not in a hurry thank you very much he's just a total a$$)? Much as I'd love to teach my children how not to be doormats, I don't think they'll really get that particular lesson in a line of traffic. Waiting in (or "on" if you're from the north) line in person - perhaps. Modeling how to speak for themselves when a friend has hurt their feelings. That's how I hope my children learn to be assertive. And, I hope I'm never alongside you in a traffic jam when I've needed a bathroom for the last three hours! ;):D:lol:

[Jackie in AR]

I don't let them in, either, Lisa.

 

They can wait their turn.

 

Just like I'm doing.

[Jackie in AR]

Another peeve of mine is the tailgating.

 

Mine, too.

 

I'm not a slow driver :tongue_smilie:, so usually the only time someone is tailgating me is when there is traffic in front of me.

 

I just start slowly decelerating.

 

And I'll admit that I've been know to accelerate slightly when they whip into the next lane, thinking they are going to be able to get between me and the car ahead of me. Because that is going to save them so much time, kwim?

 

Just wait your turn, people!!

 

I think I definitely have driving issues. :lol::lol::lol:

[Jackie in AR]

Morons. That's a good word.

 

 

Idiot is my word of choice.

 

I've tried to lay off of it recently, though, since about a month ago I was cut off in traffic and my 6yo piped up from the back seat, "What an idiot, huh, Mom?"

 

Little pitchers truly do have big ears.:001_huh:

[wheezie]

Ah, don't get me started about driving. :glare: It's like I just lose my mind when I get behind the wheel of a car. I'm normally easy to get along with, but not when it comes to driving. The other day dh was driving and we were behind a pokey-ds (3) pipes up and says "Just blow the horn dad!" *blush*:lol:

 

I need to do SO much better when it comes to extending grace in traffic.

[pqr]

Just had an individual coming the wrong way down the lane near our apartment and he expected me to get out of the way. I found it a most relaxing experience to turn off the engine and pull out the newspaper till he reversed out of my way.

[Puma Mom]

Another peeve of mine is the tailgating. I will usually drive 5 miles over the limit (if it is safe) but I still get people right up on my tail. If they don't back off then I slow down and will drive the EXACT speed limit. Then I just turn up the music and enjoy the ride. If you are nice I will drive the limit +5, if not then tough!

 

I do that! I figure if someone is right on my tail then I should be EXTRA-special care to keep LOTS of space between myself and anyone in front of me. I also need to slow down verrryyyyy carefully before I turn into my neighborhood. Can you say passive-aggressive?:D

[Mrs Mungo]

I recently decided to pretend that people cutting in line in front of me in traffic were having a bout of explosive diarrhea and couldn't wait. It's made me smile a bit as I try to work on extending grade in traffic.

[sillyrhino]

I find I need grace very much when I'm in the car (and at 5pm, my witching hour). I need to take that breath before I call someone an doofus, or worse.

 

We were all traveling in the car the other day, and my son (5) saw a woman riding a scooter without a helmet. He asked why she wasn't wearing one. We've been talking a lot about free will and how God doesn't stop people from doing things that are bad or wrong, so this led into the familiar discussion. After, he said "Gosh, I hope she doesn't get hurt."

 

Two seconds later, I got cut off on the freeway and started to get upset, and my husband had to remind me of what my ds had just said - so I could take that breath and wish them the best.

 

Sigh.

 

Celia