BC questions for soon newlywed daughter

[J-rap]

Hi all! I don't believe I've ever posted such a personal question before! My daughter is soon to be married, and will be going on bc for the first time. She spent some time talking to the doctor about it, and has narrowed it down to either the pill or the Mirena IUD. I am very inexperienced with BC. (I had fertility issues, and was always TRYING to become pregnant. Then my husband had a vasectomy.) What is your experience with one or the other, for someone who has perhaps used both?

[AK_Mom4]

BC is one of those topics that gets you very mixed results. What works for one woman will be a disaster for another.

 

I have the Mirena IUD and have had very positive results with it. No side effects, minimal cramping and no periods. I have had it for 3 years and would recommend it. There will be folks out there who will also tell you horror stories about their experiences with it.

 

I was on BC pills and had very poor results (including a blood clot). They made me sick to my stomach and I experienced weight gain and PMS. There are also folks here who will give positive reports.

[Sputterduck]

From Mirena's website:

 

"Mirena is recommended for women who have had at least one child."

 

http://www.mirena-us.com/just-the-facts/

 

It seems like the Mirena would not be ideal for her.

[roxanne23]

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Edited January 4, 2023 by roxanne23

[roxanne23]

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Edited January 4, 2023 by roxanne23

[KungFuPanda]

I hink of the IUD as birthco teol for people whom think they're done having children, but don't want to burn that bridge just yet.

 

As a newlywed, I'd experiment with a few prescriptions before going the IUD route.

[Carrie12345]

I *loved* the Mirena, but I wouldn't recommend it pre-kids. For me, it was a "We think we're done...l but maybe we'll change our minds" situation.

 

I did conceive and have a ruptured ectopic with the Mirena, and still went on to have #5, but it's not something I would have messed with if I had been PLANNING for a #5. (And I'm still shocked by his presence :tongue_smilie:.)

[DusksAngel]

I have a Mirena IUD, haven't had any problems with it. But I would still encourage her to wait to get one until they've had their first child. I guess I'm just a worrier at heart, but here's my 2 cents: If she has a reaction to the pill she just stops taking it and it clears up fairly quickly. If she has a problem with an IUD, she may not be able to have children at all.

[LucyStoner]

I would go with the pill or depo for a newlywed. IUDs are not suggested for women who have not been in labor before because it is harder to insert it becaue the cervix has never dilated.

 

That said, I have one of those birth control pill babies from when I was a newlywed. He is 8. :001_smile: and yes, I used it 100% correctly. It is rare for that to happen though.

[sbgrace]

Has she had children before? I don't think IUD is a good option in her circumstance and I'm surprised it was recommended.

 

I didn't tolerate BC pills well (severe nausea and vomiting throughout the cycle) though we finally found one I could stomach (literally) almost 7 months after I was married. I'd encourage her to start them early to make sure she's going to handle it fine and leave room to try different pills if needed. I wish I had done that.

 

We eventually used Natural Family Planning with barrier methods around ovulation and still do. I'm a fan of it for lots of reasons but there is a greater chance of surprise pregnancy if barrier methods are incorporated.

Edited August 24, 2011 by sbgrace

[Scarlett]

I took BC pill for about 12 years straight with no apparent problems but I really really regret taking them for so long. I think it made it harder for me to conceive when I began TTC at age 33.

 

I would only recommend the BC pill for very young women and only for a few years at most. JMO. YMMV. ;)

[sahm99]

The IUD might really not be an option.

 

I know my OB, who is very much pro-Mirena/IUD, will not put one into a woman who has not give birth.

He will flat out refuse, saying that the risk of sterility down the road is there...and very real...!

[stripe]

The other issue with an IUD, besides the *very* good reasons listed already, is that some women have quite a bit of bleeding initially (like .... weeks), and this might not be great for her.

 

I would also recommend she begin taking birth control a month or so before she wants it to kick in, which might also help with side effects.

[Janie Grace]

Does she know anything about natural family planning? We've been using that for over three years now. I track my chart on FertilityFriend.com so I know when to use a barrier method.

 

This is what I'd recommend too. There is just nothing like knowing your body! Check out Taking Charge of Your Fertility.

 

Personally, I know too many people who struggled with infertility after using hormonal BC. For that reasons (and others) I wouldn't recommend it.

[Scarlett]

This is what I'd recommend too. There is just nothing like knowing your body! Check out Taking Charge of Your Fertility.

 

Personally, I know too many people who struggled with infertility after using hormonal BC. For that reasons (and others) I wouldn't recommend it.

 

I wish I had gone that route.

[Gailmegan]

I am another to took hormones for a while and regretted it. I have been using Natural Family Planning/Fertility Awareness Method for 11 years now with barrier method during fertile times and I would never go back to hormones of any kind. And yes, all three of mine were planned, so it works! And no side effects.

[SonshineLearner]

Just a thought... there's an "easy" pregnancy control (or fertility help) alternative called http://www.lady-comp.com/en It's guaranteed for 10 years?? I think. So, over the course of years helping you get pregnant when you want... and not if you don't.... it's a great deal. Also, the no hormones and not messing in other ways with your body is great. ;)

[justamouse]

It's highly personal. I can't take any hormones because I get moody like no ones business. No one deserves how I get, it's like a black cloud hovers over my head constantly.

[ktgrok]

First of all, she needs to read this book before getting married. I don't care what birth control she uses, she should know her body and her cycle: http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Your-Fertility-Anniversary/dp/0060881909/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1314201843&sr=1-1

 

Also, the book details traditional methods of birth control, like the pill, etc and gives the pros and cons. But mainly it teaches you how to know when you are fertile and when you are not,so you can use a barrier method at those times. Or abstain at those times. I used it for 7 years to avoid pregnancy, without a problem, and when I was ready to get pregnant we conceived the first time we tried. In contrast, I got pregnant while on birth control pills! So one is more effective than the other for me!

 

Also, I highly advise against the Depo injection someone else mentioned. It has more side effects than the pill, and once it is injected you have to live with them until it wears off. With the pill, if there is a problem at least you can stop taking it!

[AlmiraGulch]

I would go with the pill or depo for a newlywed. IUDs are not suggested for women who have not been in labor before because it is harder to insert it becaue the cervix has never dilated.

 

That said, I have one of those birth control pill babies from when I was a newlywed. He is 8. :001_smile: and yes, I used it 100% correctly. It is rare for that to happen though.

My BC baby just turned 15. :D

[ktgrok]

My BC baby just turned 15. :D

 

Yup. Mine is 12. And I have many friends with BC babies too. It really isn't that rare at all.

[AngelBee]

This is what I'd recommend too. There is just nothing like knowing your body! Check out Taking Charge of Your Fertility.

 

Personally, I know too many people who struggled with infertility after using hormonal BC. For that reasons (and others) I wouldn't recommend it.

 

:iagree:

[Heather in OK]

Another recommendation for TCOYF and charting/NFP.

 

We all know only abstinence is 100%. ;) So charting/NFP isn't 100% but her body will be free of hormone altering substances so that when they do desire to TTC, she'll quite possibly have an easier time. Not only because of that but she'll know her body's pattern and will know when ovulation will happen. Many, many women don't understand why they aren't conceiving and for some it's a simple issue of timing.

[meggie]

I dunno, sometimes I feel we women are given the short end of the stick when it comes to this kind of things. Pregnancy has its risks. All BC has risks, even if the risks are lower success rates. Then there's the problem of not enjoying TeA as much. My Mirena is fine for now. I had it put in after three kids and was the compromise with the doctor about wanting my tubes tied. There was a light period for several weeks. And sometimes it feels like the strings or the IUD itself is poking me. And sometimes it makes TeA hurt. I've never been on BC pills, but I know so many people on it and it just killed their desire. And for NFP, she should know that the times she is ovulating will be when her hormones will make her want TeA the most.

[happypamama]

More recommendations for TCOYF, charting, NFP, etc.

 

Aside from other considerations about hormonal BC, one very good reason to learn about charting and fertility signals now is because it will be easiest now, and the knowledge will help her later. Once she has a child, if she breastfeeds, hormonal BC is not okay (I think the mini-pill is, but it is less reliable too), so learning her fertility signs now, while they're consistent and reliable, will be helpful when they're less consistent. Knowing what fertile cervical fluid looks like is helpful, and her cycle should be fairly consistent right now -- might not be while nursing.

[Lady Marmalade]

I was one who was on BC pills for several years and never, ever had problems with it. No side-effects, and it worked. The second I went off the pill both times, we easily got PG with our two.

 

Now I am using Depo, and I definitely don't recommend that for someone who has never used BC. It took about six months for me to get comfortable with these hormones- the first two months was simply awful. Now I've adjusted completely, and I love not having my period ever. But it's not a good choice for a newlywed, as drive tends to wane. ;)

[elizabeth]

I would tell her to ask her OB/GYN.

[Annie]

I am another to took hormones for a while and regretted it. I have been using Natural Family Planning/Fertility Awareness Method for 11 years now with barrier method during fertile times and I would never go back to hormones of any kind.

 

:iagree:

 

I went on BC when I got married. It made me gain weight and not feel like tea. Bad combo for a newlywed. I only lasted three months before I got rid of the darn things.