wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 They are behind?? :glare: Dd 8th is in Volleyball. We had the parents meeting tonight. We sat by dd's friends parents and apparently none of them knew dd was homeschooled. So when her friend asked what her schedule was like she told her she was homeschooled and ALL 4 family members (mom, dad, friend and little brother) looked at us like :001_huh: :svengo: So mom immediately says "Isn't she behind" Ok, the looks irritated me enough so I said well she is in Basic College Math.;) OK- You and I know that is not as serious as it sounds. Its just pre-algebra BUT they didn't. And the look on their face was SO worth the assumptions I allowed whether it was right of me or not. THEN dad pipes up. "She can't be homeschooled, she is to well adjusted" :banghead: REALLY PEOPLE??? Lets just keep talking like all 4 of my kids are not right there listening to this word for word. :banghead: Apparently I let my kids out of our dungeon to much. I need to cut down on that I guess :toetap05: Thank you for listening :rant: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Runningmom80 Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Oh man, I'm not looking forward to these types of conversations! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cricket Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 You could tell the dad that you will have to work harder on messing her up. :001_smile: That is weird they would think she is behind. Isn't the stereotype that all homeschoolers are whiz kids? :confused: (Although mine certainly aren't....) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 People here tend to think you're trying to raise smarties. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted August 23, 2011 Author Share Posted August 23, 2011 That is weird they would think she is behind. Isn't the stereotype that all homeschoolers are whiz kids? :confused: (Although mine certainly aren't....) People here tend to think you're trying to raise smarties. I ALWAYS get people asking if they are behind :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellydon Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Here everyone assumes homeschooled kids are several grade levels ahead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cloversandlions Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Here everyone assumes homeschooled kids are several grade levels ahead. :iagree:with this. I've been fortunate to have encountered minimal negativity WRT homeschooling. The worst has come from my sister (who does not have children). Well, and the receptionist at the school where my children had previously been enrolled - she hung up on me when I told her they would not be returning. Hmph. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatCyndiGirl Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 My kids probably WERE rather sheltered, but my 5 and 6 year olds got to hear the term '0ral $ex' tonight on the news. Joy. Then I got the question, "what does THAT mean?!" I told them, "when people talk about gender". :001_huh: I wish I would have thought fast enough to say, "They meant oral SNACKS. Sometimes people just mispronounce words!" :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 ...Apparently I let my kids out of our dungeon to much. I need to cut down on that I guess :toetap05: :lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 I can't believe there is anyone left in the US who hasn't read about hs'd kids winning all the spelling bees. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilymax Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Around here, we also hear that people expect homeschoolers to be advanced. Which is kind of a bummer, because mine are so totally average, academically! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted August 23, 2011 Author Share Posted August 23, 2011 I can't believe there is anyone left in the US who hasn't read about hs'd kids winning all the spelling bees. :lol: Maybe this family is the sheltered ones :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Around here, we also hear that people expect homeschoolers to be advanced. Which is kind of a bummer, because mine are so totally average, academically! :iagree: I get that all the time as well, and my children are very average. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyofsixreboot Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Ugh! If one more person assumes my kids are " slow" (their words) I will run screaming. And yes, they always say it in front of the kids. :grouphug: to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desertmum Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Ugh! If one more person assumes my kids are " slow" (their words) I will run screaming. And yes, they always say it in front of the kids.:grouphug: to you. Yes. Someone asked me if there was something wrong with my kid :001_huh: Some proceed to explain why ps is better: "Children need to bounce of each other"). Also, "You can't home school because your ds is an only child. How is he going to learn to get along with other children?" Not forgetting the lovely and charming "You are not a teacher. You don't even have a degree!" Did I forget the annoying and intrusive: "You are like this (like WHAT?:001_huh:) because you only have one kid. You should have had more babies so you are not obssessed with the one you've got." :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Yes, here it is assumed they are ahead. Worked great with my dd, not so great with my ds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 They are behind?? :glare: Dd 8th is in Volleyball. We had the parents meeting tonight. We sat by dd's friends parents and apparently none of them knew dd was homeschooled. So when her friend asked what her schedule was like she told her she was homeschooled and ALL 4 family members (mom, dad, friend and little brother) looked at us like :001_huh: :svengo: So mom immediately says "Isn't she behind" Ok, the looks irritated me enough so I said well she is in Basic College Math.;) OK- You and I know that is not as serious as it sounds. Its just pre-algebra BUT they didn't. And the look on their face was SO worth the assumptions I allowed whether it was right of me or not. THEN dad pipes up. "She can't be homeschooled, she is to well adjusted" :banghead: REALLY PEOPLE??? Lets just keep talking like all 4 of my kids are not right there listening to this word for word. Apparently I let my kids out of our dungeon to much. I need to cut down on that I guess :toetap05: Thank you for listening Yeah, the problem with letting homeschoolers out of the dungeon is that you have to deal with people who aren't well socialized ;). :banghead: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iquilt Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 I'm sorry you had that experience. It's strange, but since we moved our new neighbors all assume our kids must be ahead of theirs when they find out we homeschool. Most then jump in with the "I could never teach my kids anything" phrase that we get everywhere, especially from teachers. We have a very quiet neighborhood during the day as I am one of only 2 SAHM on our end of the street. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeekingSimplicity Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Then I got the question, "what does THAT mean?!" I told them, "when people talk about gender". :001_huh: :lol: I like that answer I wish I would have thought fast enough to say, "They meant oral SNACKS. Sometimes people just mispronounce words!" :001_smile: that would have backfired on you when at snack time they started asking for oral... snacks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoggirl Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 It's snarky, but sometimes that is called for! Look them straight in the eye and say: "Oh, no! They're not behind. Me and Bubba learn 'em real good at home." Then turn away. I didn't use this often, but for people who were strangers who were being critical who had a certain "tone," I had no problems with striking back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
love2read Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 The last negative reaction we had was in the early 90s when my first child was still young. Where do you live? Maybe reactions are regional? We're in PA. It might have something to do with how the child acts or is dressed. I've always taught my children to look adults in the eye and to be pro-active about asking them questions even if it's as simple as "How are you today?" It's especially important for reserved children to do this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mary in VA Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 My almost 17 yo dd thinks it is so funny because when she is at non-school activities (dance, art, etc) all the other kids are SOOOO surprised to find out she is homeschooled because she is so normal. I guess I let her out too much :lol: Mary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in NC Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Accidental rudeness. What would Dumbledore say? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linders Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 The other day at swim team tryouts the coach said, "But he seems so normal!" when I mentioned that DS8 is homeschooled. (And for the record, no, he is not normal. He can run rings around the math, science, and history skills of most 3rd graders.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 I've never had that experience; if anything, people assume that they must be ahead in some area (I guess since they have a teacher all to themselves). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A.J. at J.A. Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 People here tend to think you're trying to raise smarties. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RahRah Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 I think here, where we have a large number of homeschoolers, the assumption is our kids are ahead....I hear something along that line frequently in conversations, even amongst homeschool families. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 I work summers at a uniform store that is contracted to many private schools in the area (they have to buy their uniforms from us), including several whose yearly tuition would buy me a nice new small car annually. (No, they are not boarding schools, either.) Surprisingly, I have found out that my children's education stacks up very well against what I'm hearing from the highschoolers, with the exception that we do not learn Latin, although not all of them do either. We've opted to try to make Spanish a second language, not just a subject. One of my co-workers' kids went to a local public high school that is very affluent, has lots of resources, and has the highest test scores around. Her kid is very smart and should really be going to a LAC, but she was not counseled well, and her mom (an elementary school teacher) did not seem to be able to grasp being proactive on the kid's behalf, although they both peppered me with questions all summer long before her senior year. The girl is moving in with relatives (needs some independence) and she'll be going to the local CC. With her stats, if she had "worked it," I really think she could have been going to a LAC w/ a large scholarship, and she'd have been well-served by it. I'm sad for her, but she's not my student, so there's not much I can do. Sigh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SailorMom Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 (edited) They are behind?? :glare: Dd 8th is in Volleyball. We had the parents meeting tonight. We sat by dd's friends parents and apparently none of them knew dd was homeschooled. So when her friend asked what her schedule was like she told her she was homeschooled and ALL 4 family members (mom, dad, friend and little brother) looked at us like :001_huh: :svengo: So mom immediately says "Isn't she behind" Ok, the looks irritated me enough so I said well she is in Basic College Math.;) OK- You and I know that is not as serious as it sounds. Its just pre-algebra BUT they didn't. And the look on their face was SO worth the assumptions I allowed whether it was right of me or not. THEN dad pipes up. "She can't be homeschooled, she is to well adjusted" :banghead: REALLY PEOPLE??? Lets just keep talking like all 4 of my kids are not right there listening to this word for word. :banghead: Apparently I let my kids out of our dungeon to much. I need to cut down on that I guess :toetap05: Thank you for listening :rant: Every year, multiple times, for 8 years now. Here - they assume kids are behind and socially inept (at least the people I have run in to). I feel your pain. Sometimes I feel like a broken record. I have finally gotten over feeling the need to justify our decisions and defend my son's education - but it still bothers me. Edited August 23, 2011 by SailorMom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 The only time I get really irritated is when a parent of a child who is having obvious issues socially or academically tells ME that homeschooling creates socially ill-adjusted kids or academically disadvantaged kids. I want so badly to point them back to their own kids and scream, "REALLY?" I had a public school teacher parent give me her views on the above. Meanwhile her oldest has a drug problem and has been in rehab. Her daughter is obviously boy crazy and often sneaks out of the house to meet friends. Her grades are also quite low. Not to mention I have worked in public education for over 16 years as a high school teacher and school counselor before homeschooling. Which I do bring up if I have simply had enough of their nonsense. Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 It stresses me out a little, because people make comments assuming my children are way AHEAD in everything. One of my sons is wanting to go to high school next year, and because there are so many options in my community for public/christian/private schools, I have been asking people a lot of questions. I tend to get a "your kids will probably go straight to calculus in 9th grade" type responses. My kids are ahead in some things, probably weak in others. I think around here, people know a lot of brilliant and ambitious homeschoolers, lol, or they just have bought into the stereotype that homeschooling allows some uber-academics. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted August 23, 2011 Author Share Posted August 23, 2011 Yeah, the problem with letting homeschoolers out of the dungeon is that you have to deal with people who aren't well socialized ;). :banghead: :lol: It's snarky, but sometimes that is called for! Look them straight in the eye and say: "Oh, no! They're not behind. Me and Bubba learn 'em real good at home." Then turn away. I didn't use this often, but for people who were strangers who were being critical who had a certain "tone," I had no problems with striking back. :thumbup: I love it!! Where do you live? Maybe reactions are regional? We're in PA. Yeah I wondered about that also. We are in a small rural area in Wyoming close to the South Dakota border. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 People here tend to think you're trying to raise smarties. :iagree: I get more of the opposite assumption around here of the OP's story. Like my kids are certainly going to be Harvard bound and we're way ahead. My son did do algebra as a 4th grader, so he is smart. But if he were in school, he'd still be smart. But he'd be covering that as a class clown behavioral problem. I'm homeschooling so my kids can be challenged, but they can still be kids. Anyway, I think any kind of assumption is dangerous. That actually goes for PS too. I know plenty of very bright PS kids that have parents that are practically working as hard as I am homeschooling keeping their kids engaged and challenged in some way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cricket Posted August 23, 2011 Share Posted August 23, 2011 Some proceed to explain why ps is better: "Children need to bounce of each other"). My children do this just fine already. Literally. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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