Kelly1730 Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Oh, and for the record, my word of choice is "pickle". None of my kids say that though:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereks mom Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 It sounds very close to the curse word that it is intended to replace. I believe we are supposed to avoid all appearances of evil and this is one of those appearances. A much better word choice can be used. :iagree: I used to think my dad was being picky when he wouldn't let me use words that sounded similar to curse words, but now that I have my own kids, I see his point. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweetMissMagnolia Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 my son's "curse" words come from SB --FISH-PASTE!! lol he has let the S word slip (has heard around the house some)---but he knows it's not right..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom4him Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 What do you think? Do you allow it? Do you allow some tamer substitutes but not this one? Do you allow all substitutes? Do you allow all language whether it is a substitute or not? Nope!, NOPE, NOPE! When we were in Denver last summer/fall my dh took my two to skate board parks and they often spent the day there. The language that started to become a part of my ds's life was appalling. I talked to my dh about this until I was blue in the face. I understand they needed something to do. I understand that it didn't cost anything(very important to us at the time.) I also understand that they could go at times when there were not many kids there and leave when said kids starting to flow in. My dh does NOT use that language but is not at all a disciplinarian so things just kept getting worse. By the time we were home I was ready to pull out my hair. When we got home I came down hard. If he used that kind of language with me and his sister he was not other kid/friend approved. If he used a word once he was warned, if he continued and used it again, he was grounded to the yard for the next 24 hrs. If it continued he was grounded for the week and at that point he would get grounding added on a week at a time. He spent 3 wks grounded a couple of times but it seemed to take care of the problem. Once in a while he will get mad at me and end up slipping with a lesser word which I deal with but the 'f' word or derivatives of such are not a part of it any longer. I am sorry but our language is large and I feel very strongly that kids need to be taught to use good words even when they are angry/upset. Probably more than you wanted to read.:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Some things aren't really substitutions....or maybe I'm just dumb. But I don't think there is anything wrong with "rats" and random words like "mudslinging butterflies!" That isn't nearly the same thing as most of the words in this thread. JMO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UnsinkableKristen Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Not allowed. No curse words at all here. When I hear people use the work frickin', it's pretty clear what word they are using it as a substitute for, and it's not freaking. ;) I don't think that is very fair. I use the word "frickin" pretty often, and I promise you that I - personally - am not saying it just to substitute the other "f" word. I totally understand that people may not prefer that word, don't like hearing it, etc., however it's just not accurate to assume that every single person who says a certain word is trying to replace a "worse" one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angela in ohio Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 (edited) I don't think that is very fair. I use the word "frickin" pretty often, and I promise you that I - personally - am not saying it just to substitute the other "f" word. I totally understand that people may not prefer that word, don't like hearing it, etc., however it's just not accurate to assume that every single person who says a certain word is trying to replace a "worse" one. Maybe it's a regional thing, but here it is used as an adjective - the frickin' this, the frickin' that - in a frustrated or angry way. It is a substitute for the F word. When people say they are freaking out, they just say freaking out. Edited June 27, 2011 by angela in ohio Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kchara Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I don't allow my kids to substitute words like that. Well, they do say "shoot" and "dang it," but I don't think they know what they're substituting, so that's not a deal to me. If I think they're intentionally substituting a word, we have a talk. If the talk doesn't work, they are subjected to one of Daddy's drawn out, boring, and impossibly long lectures. Usually cures it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joker Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 It really doesn't bother me at all. My dds have heard swear words but I've never heard them use them. They are allowed to say many of the "substitutes" in this thread but I've never heard them say them outside the home. I don't think they or anyone else who uses those words have a limited vocabulary or are somehow "less" ~ its just words. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 27, 2011 Author Share Posted June 27, 2011 Maybe it's a regional thing, but here it is used as an adjective - the frickin' this, the frickin' that - in a frustrated or angry way. It is a substitute for the F word. When people say they are freaking out, they just say freaking out. Same here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UnsinkableKristen Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Maybe it's a regional thing, but here it is used as an adjective - the frickin' this, the frickin' that - in a frustrated or angry way. It is a substitute for the F word. When people say they are freaking out, they just say freaking out. I can understand that. However, I still think that you can use a word in a similar manner without intentionally substituting it for a different word. It's exactly like saying "shoot". Some people are really just saying "shoot". They aren't wanting to say sh*t, you know? In the same way, some people are just saying "fricking" or "freaking" they aren't trying to say f***ing. I really do understand if people don't like those words anyway. But I think there is a difference in disliking a word because you think it sounds crass, and disliking a word because you assume they are really trying to say something worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 27, 2011 Author Share Posted June 27, 2011 I can understand that. However, I still think that you can use a word in a similar manner without intentionally substituting it for a different word. It's exactly like saying "shoot". Some people are really just saying "shoot". They aren't wanting to say sh*t, you know? In the same way, some people are just saying "fricking" or "freaking" they aren't trying to say f***ing. I really do understand if people don't like those words anyway. But I think there is a difference in disliking a word because you think it sounds crass, and disliking a word because you assume they are really trying to say something worse. I asked the question about what people allow in their own homes. Hopefully no one is judging those who do allow certain language. And hopefully no one is judging those who don't - no matter what their reasoning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I say "frick" sometimes, probably because of Scrubs. This. My dh and I were big Scrubs fans for a while and this is a running joke on the show. We still say it sometimes, in jest. Last night we were watching a show and one of the characters held a cup of coffee under another character's nose. My dh immediately said, "Toe or finger?!" and I said, "It's always the toe!" ha ha ha :tongue_smilie: No, my kids aren't allowed to say frick or frickin or crap. They do, however, say 'dang it' all. the. time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imprimis Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I can understand that. However, I still think that you can use a word in a similar manner without intentionally substituting it for a different word. It's exactly like saying "shoot". Some people are really just saying "shoot". They aren't wanting to say sh*t, you know? In the same way, some people are just saying "fricking" or "freaking" they aren't trying to say f***ing. I really do understand if people don't like those words anyway. But I think there is a difference in disliking a word because you think it sounds crass, and disliking a word because you assume they are really trying to say something worse. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 They're just words to us. I teach them better word choices but sometimes those words have their place. FWIW, my favorite naughty word is sh*t. I say it often. My kids don't repeat it. Yet. I guess we just don't make a big deal out of it. They know when it's appropriate (in our own home). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I say it myself. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I say it, and even the word that it's replacing. Not around the girls though. The girls are really good about knowing what they can say and not say. Becca's slipped out with a "d@mmit" about twice in her life, and once she was very young. We didn't treat it as a huge deal. I don't know what we'll do when the girls get older. Cross that bridge when we get to it and all. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caitilin Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Not long ago there was an NPR piece on a process for extracting oil and natural gas from rocky strata, called hydraulic fracturing*, or, in the business, "fracking."** The NPR report was great. The reporter was saying things like "There is great debate over the fracking process." "There is concern that the fracking chemicals can leak into groundwater." "A fracking disclosure law was recently passed." My dh finally turned to the radio and said "Wow, calm down, man." *My dad, a chemical engineer, was involved in early work in hydraulic fracturing in the '70's, during the oil embargo days; he lost that work when the recession ended and oil prices went back down. Looks like it's back again. **Battlestar Galactica fans are already snickering. I admit when first heard this word, the BG reference was my first thought as well...:tongue_smilie::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemyboys Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Don't allow it. We don't allow substitutes either, but I don't think my kids know any swear words to make substitutions for. Well, I say crap on occasion, but the kids don't. Same here. Dc aren't exposed to many swear words normally (I've changed my ways .... ;) ) but we don't allow the substitutes that are a short step away from the really vulgar terms, and that includes freakin' and frickin,' for us. I remember the first time I heard a 4 yo exclaim, "what in the heck ...?!" Each family makes their own choices, of course, I just knew that I didn't like hearing that from one so young. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wabi Sabi Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I curse. Quite a bit, in fact. My kids curse and I don't mind it as long as they remember that there is a time and a place. They've been told that they're just words and aren't a big deal at home, but they know that other people find them impolite and that they're not to be used in public, around friends, teachers, grandparents and the like. Crap is akin to cursing? And hearing a four year old say, "What the heck!?" made an unfavorable impression upon a previous poster? :confused: Oh my. I'm afraid that my family would leave some families here collectively clutching their pearls. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowWhite Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I don't allow it. It makes me mad when ds sings "I wanna be a billionaire so FRICKING bad..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheAutumnOak Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 No, I wouldn't allow it but no one has tried to say it...I don't curse or use replacements and don't want the boys to either...I personally think it is better for them to leran to use real words (not curses and slang terms) to express what they mean and what they are feeling... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mdmurray Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Seriously one of my pet peeves, but I cannot get my DH to agree so his use of language persists, he uses this word and the "real" one way more than I care to hear. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovemyblessings Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 We always say "For the love of peanut butter!!!" or "For the love of-----" and our anger usually turns into laughter when a funny word comes out. Yesterday it was "For the love of Pocket Lint!" when my oldest stunned his toe on the bakers rack :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 We allow frickin' as well as many of the other words listed here. They don't bother us, and we use them ourselves. I've never heard ds use them outside of the house, except with friends whose parents he knows it's okay with. For a while she used "frack". Little BSG fan? :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxbridgeacademy Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 As usual I'm in the minority here, but we don't sensor our children. As far as I'm concerned one word is the same as another. If they wanted to they could say **?! and my response would be " is that really the most appropriate thing you can say in this situation?" So far I've only had to say that 1 time. Personally I say frickin all the time... ooops. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imprimis Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 Crap is akin to cursing? And hearing a four year old say, "What the heck!?" made an unfavorable impression upon a previous poster? :confused: Oh my. I'm afraid that my family would leave some families here collectively clutching their pearls. You and me both, Wabi Sabi ;) While there is not a lot of swearing going on at my home, my older kids (and I) do use many of the "substitutes" mentioned here. In other words it's not uncommon for flippin'( especially from me), freakin', or frickin to be flyin' around here. My teen has also referred to her brother as dumba$$ on occasion (and vice versa) :glare: No, it's not encouraged, but, honestly, I don't make an issue of it because it simply isn't one to me. My kids do respect and love their parents and each other, it's just our family dynamic. They have also been taught (from a very young age) to always be respectful in public, and, that, in addition to their actions, it may also mean to use more polite language. And they do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 As usual I'm in the minority here, but we don't sensor our children. As far as I'm concerned one word is the same as another. If they wanted to they could say **?! and my response would be " is that really the most appropriate thing you can say in this situation?" So far I've only had to say that 1 time. Personally I say frickin all the time... ooops. I will join your minority. I say "sh*t" with some frequency also. My bad...:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elizabeth Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I do not allow it nor do I tolerate it. I say (and I know this is not the norm here) if the situation calls for the mother of all curse words then use it. If not, do not merely come close but avoid cursing altogether. There are times when only the real thing will suffice. I consider frickin etc to be as worthy of a correction as the" real mccoy". That said ,I consider other words to be far worse and will chew someone out if they are uttered in my presence. Yes, even if they are perfect strangers and especially if they are clients, not my fault their mommas did not raise them right. I have actually had people apologize for using such foul language in my office. If dd used them we can talk about why she should not after writing an apology and research paper on those words whatever they might be. I also apologize profusely if I use language that offends another as I have a loose tongue and have let fly some invective on many occasions. I do own it and make amends for it to the person I have injured. You would think with the many times I have had to apologize to others I would learn ....we all have our faults and mine is a sharp tongue without regard for the person or circumstances. A belittling What do YOU want is just as bad as the f bomb and can cut even deeper. I need to continue to work on that . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elizabeth Posted June 27, 2011 Share Posted June 27, 2011 I curse. Quite a bit, in fact. My kids curse and I don't mind it as long as they remember that there is a time and a place. They've been told that they're just words and aren't a big deal at home, but they know that other people find them impolite and that they're not to be used in public, around friends, teachers, grandparents and the like. Crap is akin to cursing? And hearing a four year old say, "What the heck!?" made an unfavorable impression upon a previous poster? :confused: Oh my. I'm afraid that my family would leave some families here collectively clutching their pearls. I love that phrase and have not heard it in a while. :lol: Trust me you are not alone in that tendency. I can string phrases together that would make a sailor blush. I am working on it. Really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 I do not allow it nor do I tolerate it. I say (and I know this is not the norm here) if the situation calls for the mother of all curse words then use it. If not, do not merely come close but avoid cursing altogether. There are times when only the real thing will suffice. I consider frickin etc to be as worthy of a correction as the" real mccoy". That said ,I consider other words to be far worse and will chew someone out if they are uttered in my presence. Yes, even if they are perfect strangers and especially if they are clients, not my fault their mommas did not them right. I have actually had people apologize for using such foul language in my office. If dd used them we can talk about why she should not after writing an apology and research paper on those words whatever they might be. I also apologize profusely if I use language that offends another as I have a loose tongue and have let fly some invective on many occasions. I do own it and make amends for it to the person I have injured. You would think with the many times I have had to apologize to others I would learn ....we all have our faults and mine is a sharp tongue without regard for the person or circumstances. A belittling What do YOU want is just as bad as the f bomb and can cut even deeper. I need to continue to work on that . :iagree: I have an extensive vocabulary, and I know how and when to use it. Sometimes, the most appropriate word to use in a situation is a curse word. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tntgoodwin Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 I swear, when it's appropriate. Simon, the whole point of swearing is that it ain't appropriate! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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