Age you allow dc to have cell phone?

[Katiebug_1976]

I didn't vote because I don't think you can put an age on it. I think it depends on the circulstances. Normally, I would say that a child does not need (really need, not want) a cell phone at all. But, I too have started to reconsider given that my older dd's are gaining more independence and it would be nice to be able to get ahold of them or for them to be able to call if they were somewhere where a phone wasn't available. So, I think it all depends on you situation, your childs maturity level, and if you have/want to spend the $$ on it.

[Jenny in Florida]

Ours get their own when they head off to college. Until then they can use ours when they need them. We don't have texting on ours. I don't want mine on gadgets all the time. I prefer they learn to do other things when their brains are in their development stages. I'm of the camp that believes texting/twitter and even too much TV shortens attention spans and limits deeper thinking. (To each our own if you disagree.) Plus, if there is anything to brain cancer and cell phones my gut feeling tells me it's worse for a developing brain.

 

We don't shun cell phones entirely, but try to keep their use to a minimum when needed for actual contact. To me, texting is never necessary. College boy uses it a lot. It didn't hurt his ability to pick it up by not doing it in his earlier schooling years.

 

Definitely to each his own. For us, texting is extremely useful, because it doesn't interrupt other activities.

 

For example, if my son is in rehearsal and I realize I will be five minutes late picking him up, I shoot him a text. When he gets a break, he checkes his phone and reads my message and knows to wait inside the building until I arrive. Or sometimes it happens the other way around: He's in rehearsal and the director lets them know they will be released early. He can quietly send me a text without being disruptive or noisy, and I know to get there at the right time.

 

As I said in another message, my son only very rarely trades texts with his friends. He uses his phone mostly to get hold of us. The phone is not a "gadget" he uses "all the time." It's just a tool for communication when it is necessary.

 

I wonder what "other things" a child might not be doing because they have a cell phone?

[Jenny in Florida]

Do we *need* it in light of the fact that my generation survived without this electronic umbilical cord?

 

One big difference, though, is that it's extremely tough to even find a pay phone these days.

 

When I was a young teen (before I was driving), we'd have our parents drop us somewhere (mall, movies, etc.) and then call on a pay phone when we needed to be driven home. However, since most people now have cell phones, there just aren't a lot of pay phones to be found. Once or twice in the last several years, I've been without a functional cell phone, and it has been truly awful trying to make a call.

 

For example, when I went to collect my daughter and bring her home for her spring break, I dropped my cell phone into a sink full of water at a rest stop on the drive up to Virginia. I found a pay phone at the next rest stop and managed to call my husband (collect, because I couldn't scrounge enough change), tell him what happened (so he wouldn't panic when he couldn't reach me) and ask him to call our daughter and let her know, too.

 

Once I got to town, I drove directly to her dorm, but she was not yet downstairs and ready to go. I tried using the phone outside the dorm to call her room, but she and her roommate have never bothered to plug in the landline, because they both use cell phones.

 

So, I had to drive all over town scrounging more change. I lost some of it in the first pay phone, because it wasn't working. So, I had to get MORE change and look for another pay phone. Finally, I found one that allowed me to use my credit card, and I got hold of my daughter to make arrangements for pick-up. The whole process took close to two hours. With a functional cell phone, two minutes.

[abacus2]

Other: it depends on whether I want them to have one for some reason and financial considerations. I don't have as set age.

[BlsdMama]

I voted sixteen. It's a bit of a technicality really... Our home phone is a cell phone, so it's really the family phone, but the phone she'd take with her if she had to run errands, though she will not be working. She spends zero time chatting on the phone now - she prefers real life talking. :) I don't foresee it being much of an issue. Obviously we added this to our family phone plan and wouldn't expect her to in any way pay for it.

[kimnc]

We got my older ds one when he started going places that were "drop off" activities; we wanted a way for him to get in touch with us if they finished early, etc.

[Chris in VA]

Here is the plan for our family...

 

We buy an extra cell phone and it becomes the "house" phone. The children may borrow it AS NEEDED and AS DETERMINED by the parents. Since it is our phone we retain the right to do whatever we want with the phone. We can look at previous calls, text messages, and any other features that are on the phone (which would probably be limited).

 

When our children get their OWN full-time job, they can decide for themselves if they wish to purchase their own cell phone and plan.

 

This sounds like an excellent plan. :D

[MamaT]

Our older boys were teens when they got their phones back in the day. Our youngest dd got her phone at 10yo when she was away from us hours a day at gymnastics, so at that point we made sure everyone had one. They are all away from us for different reasons (sports, dance, etc.) and I want them to be able to contact us without asking an adult.

[Impish]

Right now, its a non-starter for us. The kids just aren't in a position that they are away from us.

 

I consider cell phones a safety issue when it comes to kids. If they're going to be away from us, potentially needing to be able to get a hold of us, I'd loan mine for the day or whatever. The availability of pay phones just isn't what it used to be, and I'd want to know that if an emergency came up, they could call us without an issue.

 

Other than that, when they're old enough to pay for it, and want one 'just cause', then they can get one.

[Gooblink]

It's our ds1's 13th birthday on Sunday and we're getting him a cell phone. He's responsible beyond his years, though.

[Miss Peregrine]

When they can pay for their own.

[newbie]

16, and that is only b/c she is at college.

[dcurry]

Here is the plan for our family...

 

We buy an extra cell phone and it becomes the "house" phone. The children may borrow it AS NEEDED and AS DETERMINED by the parents. Since it is our phone we retain the right to do whatever we want with the phone. We can look at previous calls, text messages, and any other features that are on the phone (which would probably be limited).

 

When our children get their OWN full-time job, they can decide for themselves if they wish to purchase their own cell phone and plan.

 

:iagree:

[Ginevra]

I think 16. I would probably say younger if my kids were not hs'ed. But there is no need for it since my kids are with me or someone I know/trust at all times and so IMO, there is no need for it. My dd is almost 14 and almost everyone her age has a phone.

 

At 16, I'm willing to pay for it, but that would probably be basic service.

[v-girl]

11 seems to be our phone age. We don't have a home phone. Our girls are at the dance studio a lot. Especially when there are rehearsals for a performance. However, they are only there are the same day on Fridays. Usually one will stay home with their brother while I run the other to the studio. Without a home phone, it only works for everyone to have a cell. And texting is a must since Mommy doesn't like talking on the phone (I worked as a receptionist and then admin assistant who had to answer the phone so much that I don't like to anymore). ha ha!

[Starr]

We got them trac phones at 14 but not because they were 14. That happened to be the age that I needed to be in contact with them. We pay for minimal minutes and they mostly text us. Dd is starting to text with friends a little and make plans to meet with students on campus but it's still low minutes.

[HSMom2One]

We needed a means to communicate with our daughter when we were apart, and since we don't have a landline any longer we got phones for each family member. Dd was 11 at the time and since she's had it she does very well with the phone. I did pay extra to have parental controls added to her phone service, which means I have the ability to block service during certain times of the day and also restrict calls to a certain group of numbers, etc.

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

 

P.S. Dh, dd and I also text each other frequently in order to send quick and to-the-point information.

Edited April 1, 2011 by HSMom2One
forgot something

[Cindy in NY]

Here is the plan for our family...

 

We buy an extra cell phone and it becomes the "house" phone. The children may borrow it AS NEEDED and AS DETERMINED by the parents. Since it is our phone we retain the right to do whatever we want with the phone. We can look at previous calls, text messages, and any other features that are on the phone (which would probably be limited).

 

When our children get their OWN full-time job, they can decide for themselves if they wish to purchase their own cell phone and plan.

 

 

This is how we are handling it as well so I voted other.

[Barb_]

A phone is just a tool. I have rules about fair use and if those are broken, there are consequences. I find that giving the child a phone earlier, like at 11 or 12, is a great way to teach them to care for something valuable. A handed down phone costs nothing but if it is lost or broken, the child must do without or save up for another used one. My kids are sooo much better at keeping track of their things than I was even into my 20's. Also, at 11 or 12 rules are internalized faster and by 14 or 15 when the constant texting could become an issue, the boundaries are already set in stone. Just my observations based on our first 4 kids.

[mereminerals]

We gave ds17 a cell phone for his 14th birthday. It was just the phone, no texting and no internet. We paid it the first year and then he took over the payments.

 

Ds14 got a cell phone when he was 11 1/2. DH had just upgraded his phone so gave the old phone to ds. At that point, we took over payment for both boys phones.

 

Dd9 is counting down until she gets her phone. It will most likely be when she is 11 or 12.

 

The boys were both to the age when they were constantly going places with friends or to ballgames without us, so it was within reason for them both to receive the phones when they did. Dd is very seldom any place I am not, so not really sure when she will get one.

 

We all have texting on our phones now. It is much easier for the boys to check in with a text than calling as it is often feasible that I am in with a client and wouldn't be able to answer the phone. We still have internet blocked from the boys' phones.

 

We also do not have a landline, so it is necessary at this point for each person to have their own phone, except dd who is never at home by herself.

[Night Elf]

The youngest has been dd13 who got one at age 12. She started going places without me and I wanted a way for us to get in touch with one another. I can't rely on other people's phones because I never know if they are charged. I figure staying in touch with my child is my responsibility.

[laurad1125]

I voted 11 because that's when they move to Boy Scouts and begin camping etc. without us. Until then, i see no reason. We pay for it but he's only allowed to take it places when we aren't there. He's not allowed to use it at home.

[ocelotmom]

This is a "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it" issue for us.

 

So far, DS is 7.5, and has had absolutely no need of a cell phone.

 

If it was a matter of them wanting their own cell phone when we didn't feel they truly needed it, we'd probably let them pay to add a line onto our plan sometime in their teens. But by that time they'll presumably be doing more independently, and we'll want them to have one anyways. When I was a teen, there were payphones around if need be. That's becoming less and less of an option.

 

When our children get their OWN full-time job, they can decide for themselves if they wish to purchase their own cell phone and plan.

What is the drawback of doing a muiti-line plan and adding them on (but making them pay the additional cost)? It teaches frugality, and gives you that much more control and oversight.

 

The only benefit I can see to this is that the cost of their own plan might be a discouraging factor.

Edited April 1, 2011 by ocelotmom

[creekland]

Definitely to each his own. For us, texting is extremely useful, because it doesn't interrupt other activities.

 

For example, if my son is in rehearsal and I realize I will be five minutes late picking him up, I shoot him a text. When he gets a break, he checkes his phone and reads my message and knows to wait inside the building until I arrive. Or sometimes it happens the other way around: He's in rehearsal and the director lets them know they will be released early. He can quietly send me a text without being disruptive or noisy, and I know to get there at the right time.

 

As I said in another message, my son only very rarely trades texts with his friends. He uses his phone mostly to get hold of us. The phone is not a "gadget" he uses "all the time." It's just a tool for communication when it is necessary.

 

I wonder what "other things" a child might not be doing because they have a cell phone?

 

We aren't all that different. In a case like you mentioned mine would just have a family cell phone with them and we'd call our messages instead of texting them.

 

When I reference kids doing "other things" it was talking about those who do nothing else (seemingly) but hang out on their phone texting and receiving texts. I prefer my kids to do other things. Those other things can include reading, riding bikes, playing outside, playing board games, etc... I know several kids who would have serious withdrawal symptoms if cell phones were taken away. Many at school lose them because they can't go a whole school day without texting (and that's forbidden in my school). Those were the kids who came to mind when I made my statement - not situations like you mentioned. ;)

[JennyD]

My 5yo does a couple of drop-off activities, one a subway ride away. We haven't gotten our act together enough yet to get him one of those preprogrammed phones, but it would probably be a good idea. In fact, thinking more about it now, maybe we'll do that this weekend.

Edited April 1, 2011 by JennyD

[Jenny in Atl]

Both mine have phones. Oldest, is away at school, and I need to be able to communicate with her about after school activities, etc. My youngest, because she has type-1 diabetes, and I want her to be able to reach me when she is with my folks, or at a class and needs help. Neither of the use their phones much. Like others have said, they're tools, and I expect them to be used wisely.

[T Baer]

with his grandmother (my mother-in-law). The phone had a gps locator service and so if there was a problem we could reach them. He never had to use it and over time, sadly their walks became less and less as she was unable to walk as much. She did not like for us to worry about her or keep track of her, so we kept track of him. :)

[Punks in Ontario]

Other. When they can pay for it themselves. For dd that was when she went to university. And she couldn't always pay.