Giraffe Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 A little background: DD is 3 1/2. She attends Montessori school in the mornings - for learning and socialization (we're new to the area and can't seem to plug in anywhere). In the afternoons we read books, do puzzles, she helps with laundry and dinner, we play. Her favorite place in the world is the bookstore. Her second favorite is the library (second only because she has to be quiet there). DH was playing with her last night and she pulled out a number/peg manipulative from MFW that is made by Lauri. It's part of their "preschool package" - gentle introductions to numbers and letters through play. They were playing together and she couldn't count in sequence from 1 to 10 consistently. DH freaked out. DD knows most of the numbers 1-10, can identify most of the arabic numerals and can identify the number of pegs necessary to make up that number. She's not so good at counting - and I think that's just because she's being silly, honestly. She gets that glint in her eye when we start with the counting and intentionally (I believe) mixes up the numbers. DH is convinced she's behind developmentally and we need to start working on this ASAP. I think he's being unnecessarily worried, but thought I'd ask the Hive, just in case. I've been concentrating on letters and words and reading, not math, FWIW. Advice? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mo2 Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 A little background: DD is 3 1/2. She attends Montessori school in the mornings - for learning and socialization (we're new to the area and can't seem to plug in anywhere). In the afternoons we read books, do puzzles, she helps with laundry and dinner, we play. Her favorite place in the world is the bookstore. Her second favorite is the library (second only because she has to be quiet there). DH was playing with her last night and she pulled out a number/peg manipulative from MFW that is made by Lauri. It's part of their "preschool package" - gentle introductions to numbers and letters through play. They were playing together and she couldn't count in sequence from 1 to 10 consistently. DH freaked out. DD knows most of the numbers 1-10, can identify most of the arabic numerals and can identify the number of pegs necessary to make up that number. She's not so good at counting - and I think that's just because she's being silly, honestly. She gets that glint in her eye when we start with the counting and intentionally (I believe) mixes up the numbers. DH is convinced she's behind developmentally and we need to start working on this ASAP. I think he's being unnecessarily worried, but thought I'd ask the Hive, just in case. I've been concentrating on letters and words and reading, not math, FWIW. Advice? 3-1/2? Is that the only concern? (I wouldn't even consider that a concern at that age.) Unless you have other reasons to suspect some sort of delay, I would just keep on doing what you're doing. Count pegs, fingers, toes, cereal, M&Ms, whatever. She'll get it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 At 3 1/2, this is really a non issue. Tell dh that when she is 5 1/2, if she is not able to do this, he can worry.;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boscopup Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 That's perfectly normal, developmentally. My 4 year old didn't count AT ALL or know any numbers at 3.5. He now can count to 10 at 4. I had to work with him on it. It's also normal to move numbers around or skip numbers. Both my oldest and my middle sons skipped '7' for a long time. My oldest is great at math, doing multiplication in his head in early first grade. So skipping '7' didn't hurt him any. ;) My 4 year old is now starting to get some basic 2 + 1 = 3 type stuff. He's behind what his brother did, but he's still very much in normal developmental range. They really don't have to be able to count to 10 consistently until they're starting K, I believe? And I'm sure if she's counting at all now, she'll easily be counting to 10 and beyond by K. There is a HUGE difference between now and 1.5 years from now. Really huge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blakereese Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 (edited) Just remind him that she is 3 1/2. No need to worry about that now. Let her have fun and not stressed about what she is "supposed to know" at a certain age. She'll likely pick it up very easily without really working on it, iykwim. We were always counting things around the house and singing numbers songs, and at some point it just clicked with my kids. Most likely it will happen soon for your DD. I wouldn't even worry about it for a year or two. Maybe someone can recommend a good book for your DH to read, something that would convince him that it is OK not to start "school" with her now, and that she is really doing alright....? I don't have a suggestion for that, but hopefully someone else can list a few books. Sometimes it helps to read up on these things to feel better, I know that is what I usually do. :) HTH! Edited February 10, 2011 by blakereese Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boscopup Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Maybe someone can recommend a good book for your DH to read, something that would convince him that it is OK not to start "school" with her now, and that she is really doing alright....? I don't have a suggestion for that, but hopefully someone else can list a few books. Sometimes it helps to read up on these things to feel better, I know that is what I usually do. :) HTH! WTM has good info on what to do when. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ByGrace3 Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 my 3.5 year old counts 1-10 . . . just not in the right order! ;) I think you are fine :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 At 3 1/2, this is really a non issue. Tell dh that when she is 5 1/2, if she is not able to do this, he can worry.;) :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Tell your dh not to worry. She's 3. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ritsumei Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 At 3 1/2, this is really a non issue. Tell dh that when she is 5 1/2, if she is not able to do this, he can worry.;) :iagree:It's pretty developmentally normal. My 4 1/2 yo sometimes still does that, only now it's in the teens. It'll move up the number line, so to speak, for a while until she really masters the whole pattern. My Mom teaches K & says that when her kids say "twenty-ten" she does skip counting by 10s with them. It's a process, getting all those numbers in the right order. Especially if she likes to be silly. She'll be fine! My son is begging to do some emotocons: :chillpill::lurk5::iagree::confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 3.5? Next thing you know, you'll be telling us she can't read yet. Slackers. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Upstatemamma Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 I agree with everyone else that she is fine and it will come in time. No big deal. However, just out of curiosity, are you talking about counting like reciting numbers of counting actual objects? For what it's worth the ability to do one to one correspondence is a 4.5 year old skill (my dh is a special ed teacher and he laughed when I read this to him :)). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Yeah... she's 3.5. It's not a big deal. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMe Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Wow, I'd hate to see what he expects at 5! She's 3 1/2.... tell him to relax. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
love2read Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 New dads, gotta love 'em. I hope he continues to show a strong interest and hopefully develops a better handle on child development. Poor guy, I can understand his stress. You've gotten some great suggestions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NancyNellen Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 No worries at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blakereese Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 WTM has good info on what to do when. ;) I was thinking maybe something on child development....I know I read a few books back in the day, but I can't come up with anything off the top of my head. I know my DH liked to read things like this when our oldest was a toddler, just to see what to expect at each age and when skills are usually mastered. I'm no help! :lol: OP, no worries. Your DD is normal. Hakuna matata. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairie rose Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 At 3.5yo they should be working on counting however I wouldn't expect it to be mastered (to the point I would worry if they did not) until they were around 5 or 5.5yo. Sure, some kids can count by rote at 3.5yo from 1 - 10 and even fewer can count with one to one correspondence up to 10 but they are the exception, not the rule. In short this is a skill she should be working on just with in her environment not something she should already have mastered. Just count with her every chance you get. Count socks while folding laundry, count red cars in traffic, count forks while setting the table, count birds on the page in a picture book....it's so easy at this age to do living math. You shouldn't need a separate lesson time for it, you should easily be able to weave it into your day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommyto4 Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 My ds just turned four and has just learned to count to 10. He has one-to-one correspondence to 8, maybe. I think he is very bright and have no worries! Just keep counting... she'll get it one day! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Definitely nothing to worry about. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brasilmom Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 My dh was the same way. He used to work with a guy, who had a son slightly older than dd. At that time my dd was about 18 mo or so. The little boy was about 2 to 2 1/2. So, the guy would come to work and brag about his son counting to 40. My dh would come home and tell me that our dd need to get with the plan. I would just say "sure". Then, one day I asked him to ask his co-worker how many languages his boy can speak. That was the end of his bragging. Now my dh is more relaxed, but freaks out some time. It is normal and my dd now 5 can count and do math without problem. All things considered I much rather concentrate in letters and words than in numbers. If she cannot master letters she will not master anything at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 This is a non-issue for one so young! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
siloam Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 If it makes you feel better, I still can't get my ds, 8yo 2nd grader, to use teen names for numbers. We cover them daily. If I use him he knows what I am talking about. I suspected he was being stubborn and finally on Thursday he admitted he thought they were stupid names and base 10 counting makes so much more sense (one ten one, one ten two, one ten three....). My 8yo taking a philosophical stance on the names of numbers...what is he going to be like in his teens? :blink: I figure real life will set in sometime and he will get over it. At 3.5 you don't worry, let them have the freedom to be kids. Heather Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhudson Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 I wouldn't worry yet. If you really want to see if she knows them, put out 10 m&m's and count them once for her then tell her if she can count them, she can eat them. It always worked for mine.:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Um . . . don't most 1st grade math programs begin with counting? I am sure that K math programs do. That is because they expect that children who are 5-6yo will not have mastered the skill of counting, even to 10. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 If he wants to feel anything, he could try feeling happy that she's interested enough to have bothered to start learning :) Rosie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EthiopianFood Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 I wouldn't worry yet. If you really want to see if she knows them, put out 10 m&m's and count them once for her then tell her if she can count them, she can eat them. It always worked for mine.:001_smile: :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devotional Soul Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 I learned to not push academics on a preschooler. Keep it fun and sing, sing, sing! They learn so much from just copying...no pushing required. Huge leaps in skills come in time at 4 and 5, and you don't want unnecessary problems that can damage the fun of learning. Enjoy those precious, cute baby years! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.... Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Hmmmm...my 3 yro is still having pee accidents and last night, she tried to eat one of the settlements pieces from Settlers of Catan. :D Trust me, you're good! I am a huge supporter of unschooling with young children. Could you google "unschooling"? There's a bunch of websites - a lot of them have great suggestions on "fun" activities to do with small children. FWIW, my oldest daughter didn't know her numbers past 10 or letter sounds when she entered public school Kindergarten and half-way through the year, she was identified as gifted. :smilielol5: (almost like a Monty Python skit, eh?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giraffe Posted February 10, 2011 Author Share Posted February 10, 2011 Thank you everyone. DH gets on these kicks and I have to just stay calm - he's so adorable when he's in a swivet. DD can count 1-10 by recitation. She has a hard time making one-to-one correspondence with objects and counting sequentially. I truly believe this is a non-issue but just wanted to check with the Hive to be sure. I worked with her yesterday and she recognizes the numbers, matched the arabic numeral with the correct number of pegs and she has a 3 1/2 yo's attention span - about 5 minutes. She also knows when she's being asked to "perform" and will refuse to do so and start acting silly. You've got to catch her in the moment. And to one of the posters - she's trying to read. Truly. She's a little scary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EKS Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Not a problem. When my son was *7* he couldn't count from 1-10 reliably. That's because he has dyslexia. But at 3.5 I would not worry about it at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalphs Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 WTM has good info on what to do when. ;) :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 DH is convinced she's behind developmentally and we need to start working on this ASAP. Advice? Honestly, this would send huge alarm bells off in my head.....about hubby. He needs to put himself out to learn the normal development of children, some boundaries between his ego and his child as an extension of his achievement, and, well, how to have fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
susankenny Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 (edited) Wow. She's THREE. I am of the mindset that when it comes to academics, a preschooler simply cannot be behind. I'm sorry your husband feels that way. It's hard to say, "Don't worry about it" when it is a huge concern for your husband, as that makes it stressful for you too. If it makes you feel any better, my son still peed his pants at 3 1/2 and couldn't write his name, let alone count. Your husband would have thought something was wrong with him, lol. I'm happy to say my little boy is 7 now & excelling academically. I hope you find a solution that works best for your little girl. She sounds like she's doing wonderful.:grouphug: Susan Edited February 10, 2011 by susankenny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singbanshee Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Hi, I didn't read through all the post but here's a link to what pediatrician's look for in milestones As you can see counting, numbers and letters are not there. HTH Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giraffe Posted February 10, 2011 Author Share Posted February 10, 2011 Honestly, this would send huge alarm bells off in my head.....about hubby. He needs to put himself out to learn the normal development of children, some boundaries between his ego and his child as an extension of his achievement, and, well, how to have fun. Yeah, he can get a little over the top sometimes. Luckily I can usually calm him down. It truly isn't an ego thing with him, it's that he just doesn't understand what kids can and can't do at different stages. And getting him to understand developmental stages is difficult. He is a classic "absent-minded professor". He'll hear something somewhere and go off on a tangent. They usually pass in time. She still has potty accidents. All. The. Time. :tongue_smilie: Actually, I think that's the issue - her brain is ahead of her body. She could probably stand to stay longer in school (she's in the morning-only program) and wants to stay, but she's just not ready physically. Our plan has always been to afterschool (DH doesn't support exclusive home-schooling) - I should probably do more, mixing it in with the play. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 It truly isn't an ego thing with him, it's that he just doesn't understand what kids can and can't do at different stages. In that case, I'd laugh out loud, call him "such a card" and go on about your business. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 It sounds normal to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giraffe Posted February 10, 2011 Author Share Posted February 10, 2011 In that case, I'd laugh out loud, call him "such a card" and go on about your business. That's usually what I do. :D Just wanted to be sure I was right on this one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rockermom Posted February 10, 2011 Share Posted February 10, 2011 Yeah, he can get a little over the top sometimes. Luckily I can usually calm him down. It truly isn't an ego thing with him, it's that he just doesn't understand what kids can and can't do at different stages. And getting him to understand developmental stages is difficult. He is a classic "absent-minded professor". He'll hear something somewhere and go off on a tangent. They usually pass in time. She still has potty accidents. All. The. Time. :tongue_smilie: Actually, I think that's the issue - her brain is ahead of her body. She could probably stand to stay longer in school (she's in the morning-only program) and wants to stay, but she's just not ready physically. Our plan has always been to afterschool (DH doesn't support exclusive home-schooling) - I should probably do more, mixing it in with the play. I think that's a great idea. Count the socks as she helps with the laundry, count puzzle pieces, etc. It's not urgent that she get this, but the foundation can be laid through play. I also have a 3.5 year old who gets "silly" if he thinks he's being asked to perform, too. We call him the Warner Bros. frog. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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