listening comprehension for 2 y.o.

[Orthodox6]

If a 2-year old even can talk with any degree of coherency, she is doing extremely well.

 

As aggravating as OP probably finds our opinions, nonetheless she has expectations incomprehensible to us who have raised and educated children.

Edited May 29, 2010 by Orthodox6

[Renee in NC]

This was my thinking as well. As far as giving her enough time, I do try to, but I just thought of something. I think I will repeat the step if she doesn't seem like she is understanding. I think I should try saying it once, then just waiting. Maybe she is almost processing each reminder as a separate step!

 

When I talk to my 3yo and give her an instruction, if she doesn't get it right away, I repeat it and add hand gestures.

 

For example:

 

Me: Look down.

 

(She looks at me.)

 

Me: Look down (while pointing at the floor)

 

Usually she will look down. Then I'll say, "See the book?" That is usually enough at that age to get her to pick it up. If there were several books, I wouldn't say, "See the green book?" because I don't expect that she could look at several books and pull the green one out consistently.

 

I'm a workbook person, too. It took until child #5 to get a child who liked workbooks!:lol:

[Renee in NC]

If a 2-year old even can talk with any degree of coherency, she is doing extremely well.

 

 

 

This is true! I didn't think about it much until I had to tell the evaluator developmental history a couple of days ago. My boys did not have coherent, *good* speech until after 3. My girls talked much earlier (my now 3yo has a GREAT vocabulary.) Children are so different and many times what we expect from them is just too much.

[chiguirre]

Also, is this typical 2 1/2 y.o. attention issue stuff? My dh has ADHD (inattentive type), and I wouldn't do anything differently now even if she did have it, but I still have it on my radar as she grows. :(

 

If you're concerned about her development, you can ask your pediatrician for a referral to the 0-3 program for screening. Mine did this for dd even though there were no actual concerns with her, but I was worried because both of her brothers are autistic. They were very nice and laid my fears to rest when she was about 18 months old. That peace of mind was priceless.

 

If you can't go the 0-3 route, a preschool or MDO can also be a good idea if your worried about a child's development. I sent dd to a Montessori school when she was 2.5 and they also told me she was doing fine. It also gave me good ideas about what a typically developing kid could do at 2 and 3. It was very reassuring to see dd's class in action and see her fitting in.

[woolybear]

The book incident you described sounds a lot like what happens here with my 7 yo. Hey, even my 9 (almost 10) yo. I find with younger kids it can help to physically touch them. Take her by the hand walk over an pick up the book with her. It can be hard to remember to do it, but I have found it does help.

 

I personally wouldn't expect that much from a 2 yo.

[wulfbourne]

LMAO. The incident sounds almost exactly like one I just had with my DD and she's 3 :) There was a towel on the sink in the bathroom. I asked her to bring me the towel. It's literally right by her head, but she's looking everywhere BUT where the towel is. I keep telling her turn, no the other way, now look up (at which point she looks at the ceiling), no down a bit (floor), by your head (looks at the shelves near her head instead of the sink just to the left), no the sink near your head (she runs across the room to the other sink and looks around), no the other sink (she finally goes back to the original sink, but looks on the floor), UGGGG no ON the sink (she FINALLY looks at the sink which has been in front of her face the whole time, gets the towel and brings it to me). All this and she's a year older than your girl.

 

Trust me though, I understand. I've had the Kumon workbooks, Peak with Books, Little Hands to Heaven, etc since she turned two. But I haven't really been able to use them. She MIGHT be ready now to do some of the simple stuff, but I'm only just getting her to start remembering what we just read in a book. So, it's a slow process. Much slower than I'd like because I'm so excited to teach her everything I can. My husband has to reign me in and remind me quite often that she's only 3.

[T'smom]

I did not read all of the previous posts, but I can sooooo understand! I've never done workbooks or directed anything with a pencil/paper so I can't speak to that- but OMGoodness, I DO think a 2 year old should be able to hand you the blue book. My son is perfectly capable of that. One time, I asked him to bring me a Kleenex and ever since then he gets upset if he sees me get my own.

This scenario happens on a daily basis in our house. "Can you hand me the black remote?" (I only ask if it is very close to him and not to me and I have my hands full, etc.) He holds up the white remote and says "This one?" "No, honey, the black one- it's on the coffee table." "This one?" picking up the remote to the wii- which isn't black or on the coffee table. "Is that one black?" "Can you hand me the black remote- the one that turns the TV on?" He'll go back and forth between the white remote and the wii-mote, when he KNOWS which one is black. I know he knows because sometimes he'll just hand it to me. And if he wants to turn the TV on- he knows not only which remote does that, but the button to push as well. When he wants to watch Netflix streaming, he knows which remote does that.

I know there will be people who think I'm lazy- I don't ask him to hand me things unless my hands are full, I'm busy, etc. And I KNOW he knows what I'm asking. You can tell by the glint in his eye and the grin on his face. It's exasperating. Oh, and when I get exasperated and just say "it's ok, honey, I'll get it" or "it's okay, we just won't turn on the TV", the black remote is in my hand as quick as lightning.

I have no idea if this is developmentally appropriate for most kids or not- but I know my son and he is more than capable.

[lollie010]

I get it...I was laughing with a friend just yesterday. When my oldest ds was 17 months old I woke up each morning and covered his desk with white paper. I wrote the letter of the week on his desk and throughout the day we would draw, color or cut out pictures of words that started with the letter. I would write the letter on the white board, etc. Pooooor Child. It was all about my expectations. Now my youngest is 17 months and I have ZERO expectations of him. Of course I have hopes, hopes that he would not pull his sister's hair or throw every single thing that he picks up. But, alas, those hopes may go unfulfilled. LOL.

 

I had the same "get the book" conversation with the little guy yesterday. It left me laughing and shaking my head. He went into every room of the house looking for the book that was literally an inch from his original position. But, since my expectations are now aligned with reality--it didn't freak me out. WIth my first son, I would have been calling my sister and asking about a curriculum on positional words. (up, down, around, through, on, under).

 

I really learned a lot when I did a kindermusik class with my first. It helped me to see him within a group of kiddos his age and developmental level. It gave me some wonderful ideas about using play, movement, and music. And it really enhanced his listening skills. If you have a class in your area and can swing the enrollment fee I highly recommend doing one semester. Then you can just do it yourself at home.

 

Ya'll are doing just fine. Enjoy.

[Chris in VA]

I don't know why I'm adding my 2 cents, but I guess I just wanted you to know that prepositions are among the last parts of speech to be used and understood by anyone learning a language. This was told to me by my preschool teacher friend, who is also a speech therapist.

That is why, developmentally, it's difficult to follow those types of directions.

Also, developmentally, the milestone for 2 is to follow one direction at a time. For 3yos, it's 2-3. Give her time.

[kmacnchs]

Because even a 2 y.o. can work at some level. :) And how can she practice listening skills if I don't ever ask her to do anything? That's just my philosophy, YMMV.

 

Haven't read all of the responses b/c I'm sure everyone is telling you to back off...I'm not one of those. To your original Q: yes, this is VERY typical 2yo behavior. I KNOW it's frustrating! dd2 is 2.5...

 

As long as you can keep your patience and she does not get too frustrated, go ahead and work on her listening skills. They are just that - skills - which take practice.

 

I remember when dd1 was 2 and I wanted her to draw a line and stop at a point and she didn't. I thought she was not obeying me and I was so frustrated! That was not the case, I realized. However, I practiced with her for a bit (over the next week) and she got it pretty quickly!

 

That all being said, no, not a sign of ADHD. Yes, very typical. imo, though, that does not mean you do not keep trying - as long as you can stay calm and she is happy with it, keep working on that line! she'll get it!

[cougarmom4]

I can relate to your eagerness to teach your little one. It is so exciting to watch them catch onto something new! I remember with my first I was just so thrilled to *finally* be able to 'teach' him something...everything else he had done on his own (y'know...typical development...rolling over, sitting up, walking, etc).

 

I'm the type of mom that is always creating 'learning activities' to do with her little ones. Some of mine have been ready to learn these types of things earlier than others. For example, the little colored bears used as a math manipulative...my intention is to teach sorting by color, then counting, then patterning. But when I first pulled them out to start with dd2, she had different ideas in mind and would rather pour them in her cups & dump them out. Then a few months later, we got to color sorting. Even though my first child was into the patterning a lot sooner, it doesn't matter...we're still playing together and the learning will come.

 

I guess what my suggestion is to perhaps find some different kind of learning activities that YOU will enjoy with dd and that SHE will be ready for...working developmental skills that will get her ready for the workbook/schooly type of learning to come. There are a lot of ideas online...try searching Tot School, for one. Puzzles are also fabulous--easier jigsaw. Magnetic ABC letters on the frig, counting the steps you walk, writing letters in sand with your fingers, etc. It might help to find lists of developmentally appropriate skills that you can follow & then create learning opportunities to teach those. I'm sure you're already doing these types of things, but I thought I'd throw out the idea of finding things more hands-on than not.

 

Now then, when you're talking of listening/comprehension skills, there are plenty of ways to play around with those--make it fun--and yet be teaching dd. Sit down on the floor with several items (red block, blue ball, brown box, green car)...talk about each item, label, give her the words. Then try different things...Can you put the blue ball INSIDE the brown box? Or give fun instructions...like playing follow the leader or Simon Says in a simplified way. Or do a treasure hunt...but walk alongside her and say the clues one at a time until you find a fun treasure to share at the end.

[EthiopianFood]

If a 2-year old even can talk with any degree of coherency, she is doing extremely well.

 

As aggravating as OP probably finds our opinions, nonetheless she has expectations incomprehensible to us who have raised and educated children.

 

Whereas I find the fact that some people blast and judge someone (about topics unrelated to the original question, no less) who openly admits they don't know about a certain topic, and are choosing to ask for advice and benefit from the wisdom of more experienced parents, incomprehensible. I'm so glad the vast majority of people here didn't do that. :)

 

WIth my first son, I would have been calling my sister and asking about a curriculum on positional words. (up, down, around, through, on, under).

 

:lol::lol::lol: Thank you for a reminder on how silly this sounds. :D

 

I don't know why I'm adding my 2 cents, but I guess I just wanted you to know that prepositions are among the last parts of speech to be used and understood by anyone learning a language. This was told to me by my preschool teacher friend, who is also a speech therapist.

That is why, developmentally, it's difficult to follow those types of directions.

Also, developmentally, the milestone for 2 is to follow one direction at a time. For 3yos, it's 2-3. Give her time.

 

I didn't know this! Very interesting. Thank you.

 

And thank you everyone for your stories of commiseration. :D I'm very glad to know this is just typical stuff. I thought about the bits of information everyone gave, did a few "tests" of my own, and I really think it's a matter of dd having too much stimulation to process things, whether from her environment or from me repeating what I said in an attempt to help her. When I clearly, calmly said her name, and waited, she said "what." I said "pick up your shirt." She said "where?" and looked around. I said "by your head" and nothing else. She saw it right away and gave it to me. If it doesn't go that well the next time, at least I'll know not to feel frustrated because it's typical behavior. :)

[LibraryLover]

Not according to KUMON! The workbook companies know best, duh. :tongue_smilie:

 

 

:lol:

 

Gosh, two is a baby. Put her in the front or backpack and go about your day. Sing songs, laugh. Let her splash in the sink. Holee crap, the things we can let ourselves worry about.

 

I know I am supposed to say "If your mommy gut says something is wrong, something must be wrong". I won't say that because I have seen some mighty dead- wrong expectations. Our society is messed up. Kumon Workbooks for toddlers is the tip of the iceberg, really. These can things suck the joy out of having a child. We're so worried about doing c & d, that we miss a & b. Don't do that. Respect A & B. ;)

 

How can I say this without sounding annoying...I can't...let this go. :)

Edited May 30, 2010 by LibraryLover

[Tap]

If you are both happy about it, I don't see any problem with doing things that you are both enjoying. I will add a bit of a story though.

 

When ds was 2 he had an asthma inhaler that he used several times a day. The ABC song was the perfect amounts of breath so we sang it several times a day. BY 2.5 he really knew his ABCs well. He had spent 6 mths learning them. (The ABCs weren't my intent, it just worked out that way) My neighbor at the time had twin 4yo boys. She heard my son doing some ABC work one day and commented that her sons didn't know their ABCs yet. The next day, she said...."I taught them their ABCs last night." They had obviously had some exposure through TV and such, but had never known much beyond that. The point being that while I spent 6 mths teaching a child the ABCs, while he was capable, it wasn't easy. She was able to accomplish the same thing in one night...when they were ready to learn it. They all learned to read at 4.5...so it wasn't and advantage for him to know them early.

 

Sometimes, when we are trying to teach our children something, if the window to learning isn't open....it can be an up hill battle, hard work and irritating to both parties. If you are able to wait until they are ready...it is a breeze, a joy and fun.

 

That is why I say.....if you are both having fun, enjoy the process. IF either of you aren't, then take some time and visit something else for a while.

 

I am sure you have heard people say that every child learns at a different pace. It is so very, very true. It is amazing to watch several children of the same age and see how one is working on physical balance, another is acquiring language, and yet another may be working on drawing/writing. Then the next week or month, they may all be switched around. If you ask you child what they want to do, they will inevitably lead you to their open window at just the right time! Kids are innate learners, it is what they do best. Use that to your advantage and have fun.

[EthiopianFood]

:lol:

 

THANK YOU for knowing I was kidding! LOL

 

I'm assuming you're posting as you read, so I won't comment on the rest. If I haven't explained well enough at this point, it's just NOT going to happen. :P

[EthiopianFood]

If you are both happy about it, I don't see any problem with doing things that you are both enjoying. I will add a bit of a story though.

 

When ds was 2 he had an asthma inhaler that he used several times a day. The ABC song was the perfect amounts of breath so we sang it several times a day. BY 2.5 he really knew his ABCs well. He had spent 6 mths learning them. (The ABCs weren't my intent, it just worked out that way) My neighbor at the time had twin 4yo boys. She heard my son doing some ABC work one day and commented that her sons didn't know their ABCs yet. The next day, she said...."I taught them their ABCs last night." They had obviously had some exposure through TV and such, but had never known much beyond that. The point being that while I spent 6 mths teaching a child the ABCs, while he was capable, it wasn't easy. She was able to accomplish the same thing in one night...when they were ready to learn it. They all learned to read at 4.5...so it wasn't and advantage for him to know them early.

 

Sometimes, when we are trying to teach our children something, if the window to learning isn't open....it can be an up hill battle, hard work and irritating to both parties. If you are able to wait until they are ready...it is a breeze, a joy and fun.

 

That is why I say.....if you are both having fun, enjoy the process. IF either of you aren't, then take some time and visit something else for a while.

 

I am sure you have heard people say that every child learns at a different pace. It is so very, very true. It is amazing to watch several children of the same age and see how one is working on physical balance, another is acquiring language, and yet another may be working on drawing/writing. Then the next week or month, they may all be switched around. If you ask you child what they want to do, they will inevitably lead you to their open window at just the right time! Kids are innate learners, it is what they do best. Use that to your advantage and have fun.

 

What a honest and supportive post. Thank you. I feel very fortunate that dd naturally enjoys many of the types of things I hoped she would (animals, numbers, letters, reading). I am quite positive that my next child will be a rough and tumble boy who likes to bang on things all day. I am being eased into parenting, I think. :D

[kwg]

http://www.1plus1plus1equals1.com/TotTrays.html

 

I have not read all the responses but maybe the link above will give you things to work with her on. I also like Slow and Steady, Get me Ready.

[Oney Jones]

I'm very glad to know this is just typical stuff. I thought about the bits of information everyone gave, did a few "tests" of my own, and I really think it's a matter of dd having too much stimulation to process things, whether from her environment or from me repeating what I said in an attempt to help her. When I clearly, calmly said her name, and waited, she said "what." I said "pick up your shirt." She said "where?" and looked around. I said "by your head" and nothing else. She saw it right away and gave it to me. If it doesn't go that well the next time, at least I'll know not to feel frustrated because it's typical behavior. :)

 

:hurray: Being "in tune" with your kids takes a lot of patience and time. I'm glad you are at peace with the issue and have learned something about your sweet girl. Way to go Mom!

[LibraryLover]

THANK YOU for knowing I was kidding! LOL

 

I'm assuming you're posting as you read, so I won't comment on the rest. If I haven't explained well enough at this point, it's just NOT going to happen. :P

 

:DI thought the whole thread was all in good fun. You know a baby is not needing a workbook to learn.

[Orthodox6]

Whereas I find the fact that some people blast and judge someone (about topics unrelated to the original question, no less) who openly admits they don't know about a certain topic, and are choosing to ask for advice and benefit from the wisdom of more experienced parents, incomprehensible. I'm so glad the vast majority of people here didn't do that.

 

 

I did not "blast" you. I remarked that, although the feedback from a number of posters undoubtedly aggravated you -- and quite clearly it has aggravated you -- that the greater number of people find your educational philosophy incomprehensible. Perhaps I should have written the word "untenable", instead of "incomprehensible", as that word more accurately conveys the intent. We would not hold that opinion, if we knew nothing about it, or about children.

 

This is like so many topics. Somebody asks for feedback, and reacts angrily or unhappily at the people who offer feedback that does not accord with the poster's pre-set preferences.

Edited May 30, 2010 by Orthodox6

[lovemyboys]

I think you're talking too much. That's too wordy for a 2 year old to follow. I'd just say, "Get the book," and point to it. And I'd still expect her to not always get it right.

 

You're asking her to do something developmentally inappropriate.

 

 

 

Honestly? She's two. She doesn't need workbooks or "seatwork" or "busywork." Lots of play and exploration, indoors and out, sandboxes, water play with containers, chalk, balls.

 

I'm sure you're excited to get going with learning, etc., or you wouldn't be here already. Best to put the books aside and just enjoy the toddlerhood. She's learning every day.

 

Fwiw, studies have shown that the kids who are early-learners or accelerated before the age of 6 or 8, pretty much even out with their age-mates by the age of 9. In addition, kids who learn through play, games, sports, board games, card games, exploration are much better in creative thinking, strategy, problem-solving as they mature.

 

Agree with Tara here, showing is good teaching. Sometimes more words just confuse, even with older kids.

[nmoira]

 

I have noticed that she will give the wrong answer to something even when she knows the answer (e.g. colors), but will give the right answer if I help her refocus somehow ("no, what color?" and point).

I would highly recommend a book called Coloring Outside the Lines. One part that stuck with me in particular was a discussion that when we expect a child to be right "because they know it," we've essentially taken away the child's freedom to be wrong. Sometimes children will tell us wrong answers just to get us off their backs. Sometimes they won't answer because they're not feeling as confident or willing to take a risk as on another day. Some might be more comfortable or assured in one context than other. This is something I still consider consciously every day: I don't want my children to be afraid to be wrong or to be afraid of taking risks. They're on their own journey, and this is not synonymous with meeting my approval.

[EthiopianFood]

This is like so many topics. Somebody asks for feedback, and reacts angrily or unhappily at the people who offer feedback that does not accord with the poster's pre-set preferences.

 

Yes, most posters have a pre-set preference that people answer the question posed and to make comments based on what the OP is actually doing or thinking, not free associations and theoretical ideas based on information that was not even given. That is the purpose of starting a thread. Unfortunately, that isn't exciting enough for a select few board members. Such is life, I suppose.

[EthiopianFood]

I would highly recommend a book called Coloring Outside the Lines. One part that stuck with me in particular was a discussion that when we expect a child to be right "because they know it," we've essentially taken away the child's freedom to be wrong. Sometimes children will tell us wrong answers just to get us off their backs. Sometimes they won't answer because they're not feeling as confident or willing to take a risk as on another day. Some might be more comfortable or assured in one context than other. This is something I still consider consciously every day: I don't want my children to be afraid to be wrong or to be afraid of taking risks. They're on their own journey, and this is not synonymous with meeting my approval.

 

This sounds very interesting. I especially agree with the bolded part. I have to work hard not to care what other people think. I hope to raise my kids in such a way that this is not such a struggle for them! I'll see if the book is at my library!

[CAMom]

There must be SOMETHING I can do to help with this. Dd is driving me NUTS. I'm trying really hard to be patient, but sometimes it's so hard. I break down instructions as much as I possibly can (e.g. instead of "get the book," I'll say "look at your feet, right next to your foot, the blue book, right there, no, LOOK at your FEET, your FEET, look DOWN....."). I have noticed that she will give the wrong answer to something even when she knows the answer (e.g. colors), but will give the right answer if I help her refocus somehow ("no, what color?" and point). She does this with casual conversation too, actually.... I have started literally pointing at my mouth to give her a place to focus when I tell her to do something. It seems to help.

 

 

 

My husband still can't find the mayo in the fridge unless I give him detailed instructions on how to find it and even then I sometimes still have to get up and get it myself.

 

Yeah...not a problem in a two year old.:lol:

 

And drawing a line from one point to another is not easy for a 2 year old even if she's done it before.

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

If a 2-year old even can talk with any degree of coherency, she is doing extremely well.

 

As aggravating as OP probably finds our opinions, nonetheless she has expectations incomprehensible to us who have raised and educated children.

 

:lol:

 

Gosh, two is a baby. Put her in the front or backpack and go about your day. Sing songs, laugh. Let her splash in the sink. Holee crap, the things we can let ourselves worry about.

 

I know I am supposed to say "If your mommy gut says something is wrong, something must be wrong". I won't say that because I have seen some mighty dead- wrong expectations. Our society is messed up. Kumon Workbooks for toddlers is the tip of the iceberg, really. These can things suck the joy out of having a child. We're so worried about doing c & d, that we miss a & b. Don't do that. Respect A & B. ;)

 

How can I say this without sounding annoying...I can't...let this go. :)

 

Honestly? She's two. She doesn't need workbooks or "seatwork" or "busywork." Lots of play and exploration, indoors and out, sandboxes, water play with containers, chalk, balls.

 

I'm sure you're excited to get going with learning, etc., or you wouldn't be here already. Best to put the books aside and just enjoy the toddlerhood. She's learning every day.

 

Fwiw, studies have shown that the kids who are early-learners or accelerated before the age of 6 or 8, pretty much even out with their age-mates by the age of 9. In addition, kids who learn through play, games, sports, board games, card games, exploration are much better in creative thinking, strategy, problem-solving as they mature.

 

Agree with Tara here, showing is good teaching. Sometimes more words just confuse, even with older kids.

 

 

:iagree:

 

My oldest son was profoundly gifted as a baby. He said his first words at 5 months, walked at 8 months, and was reading before he was 3.

 

We used all sorts of things to learn with, but I never expected him to be anything but a happy little boy. If he wanted to do something educational, and was obviously thriving, we went ahead. If he wanted to play in the mud the livelong day, I didn't give it another thought.

 

His "giftedness" didn't taper off at 6 or 9. He's 13 and I could graduate him from high school in a year if I wanted.

 

As he enters into really rigorous classical education while puberty is knocking him for a loop, one thing I am sooooo thankful for is:

 

I didn't push him when he was little.

 

Please hear this from the older, more experienced Moms. Let your little girl be little!

 

If she wants to do something educational and is obviously thriving, then proceed. If she wants to chase butterflies all day or ignore you when you tell her to do something with a pencil....just smile and go on.

[EthiopianFood]

:iagree:

 

My oldest son was profoundly gifted as a baby. He said his first words at 5 months, walked at 8 months, and was reading before he was 3.

 

We used all sorts of things to learn with, but I never expected him to be anything but a happy little boy. If he wanted to do something educational, and was obviously thriving, we went ahead. If he wanted to play in the mud the livelong day, I didn't give it another thought.

 

His "giftedness" didn't taper off at 6 or 9. He's 13 and I could graduate him from high school in a year if I wanted.

 

As he enters into really rigorous classical education while puberty is knocking him for a loop, one thing I am sooooo thankful for is:

 

I didn't push him when he was little.

 

Please hear this from the older, more experienced Moms. Let your little girl be little!

 

If she wants to do something educational and is obviously thriving, then proceed. If she wants to chase butterflies all day or ignore you when you tell her to do something with a pencil....just smile and go on.

 

I completely agree with you, although I'm not sure what that has to do with the OP. :)

[twoxcell]

I have a dd about the same age as your, and she sounds totally normal. No way is my 2 year old ready to follow instructions in a workbook. Heck I can't even get her to use the toilet :lol:. She loves to draw, so I give her blank pages and she scribbles to her hearts content. I'm assuming this is your oldest? I understand your excitement to get the school work going. I did some similar things with my oldest ds, but it only frustrated us both. Eventually they all get there. I know this has probablly been said, but enjoy her now it goes super fast. My oldest is almost 7 now. I think you are a great mom who wants to teach her daughter well:001_smile:

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

I completely agree with you, although I'm not sure what that has to do with the OP. :)

 

RaeAnne, it had to do with your coming unhinged about your toddler not following your directions for a workbook lesson that you were overly invested in. You need to study child development, and then you'll get it.

[StartingOver]

My husband still can't find the mayo in the fridge unless I give him detailed instructions on how to find it and even then I sometimes still have to get up and get it myself.

 

Yeah...not a problem in a two year old.:lol:

 

And drawing a line from one point to another is not easy for a 2 year old even if she's done it before.

 

:lol: Are you married to my husband?

[EthiopianFood]

RaeAnne, it had to do with your coming unhinged about your toddler not following your directions for a workbook lesson that you were overly invested in. You need to study child development, and then you'll get it.

 

What a snarky post considering the fact that I said I agree with you. :confused:

Edited May 31, 2010 by RaeAnne
working on those clarification skills!

[JenC3]

At least your 2 yr old doesn't want to throw everything in the toilet! LOL! You've had enough input mama, just wanted to say I understand and when it's you first and only you are eager to DO not just BE.

[Perry]

 

Fwiw, studies have shown that the kids who are early-learners or accelerated before the age of 6 or 8, pretty much even out with their age-mates by the age of 9.

I've heard this, but I've searched for those studies and can't come up with much. I know there were some Head Start studies that showed the gains they made in preschool disappeared by about 3rd grade. I think that's because they were put into schools that probably weren't very good.

 

And if there are actual studies, I doubt that they were done with gifted kids. Or homeschooled kids. :)

[lovemyboys]

I've heard this, but I've searched for those studies and can't come up with much. I know there were some Head Start studies that showed the gains they made in preschool disappeared by about 3rd grade. I think that's because they were put into schools that probably weren't very good.

 

And if there are actual studies, I doubt that they were done with gifted kids. Or homeschooled kids. :)

 

I'll look back to see if I can find you a link since you're interested. I'll try to find the one about the role that strategy games have in creative thinking.

 

Meanwhile, the overall point in my post was that OP's 2 yo will do so well with time to play and explore rather than doing worksheets for the next few years. Creative play can be underrated.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I've heard this, but I've searched for those studies and can't come up with much. I know there were some Head Start studies that showed the gains they made in preschool disappeared by about 3rd grade. I think that's because they were put into schools that probably weren't very good.

 

And if there are actual studies, I doubt that they were done with gifted kids. Or homeschooled kids. :)

 

I've seen this in articles about ps kids. Yes, if they are only given "enrichment" activities then any gains they had will level out by 3rd grade, in my opinion. My gifted ds (who also spoke his first words at 8 mo. etc.) has not leveled out. But I don't push him either. If anything he's the one pulling me along while I try to dig my heels in to get him to slow down!

[Perry]

I'll look back to see if I can find you a link since you're interested. I'll try to find the one about the role that strategy games have in creative thinking.

Thanks! I'd love to see those.

[lollie010]

My husband still can't find the mayo in the fridge unless I give him detailed instructions on how to find it and even then I sometimes still have to get up and get it myself.

 

Yeah...not a problem in a two year old.:lol:

 

And drawing a line from one point to another is not easy for a 2 year old even if she's done it before.

 

:lol::lol:

[kmacnchs]

I've heard this, but I've searched for those studies and can't come up with much. I know there were some Head Start studies that showed the gains they made in preschool disappeared by about 3rd grade. I think that's because they were put into schools that probably weren't very good.

 

And if there are actual studies, I doubt that they were done with gifted kids. Or homeschooled kids. :)

 

I get told this NON stop. It's pretty frustrating. My (just turned) 4yo is reading at a 4th grade level and finishing up 1st grade math. So for her to even out she would have to not learn anything until she is 8/9...really? Do people think that will happen? grrrrr...

[Giraffe]

My husband still can't find the mayo in the fridge unless I give him detailed instructions on how to find it and even then I sometimes still have to get up and get it myself.

 

 

Mine too.... :confused:

 

At least I know where DD gets it. :lol:

 

To OP - I won't add to the volumes of advice except to say I understand where you're coming from. I had a similar period of wondering "what the heck?!" with my DD and finally realized (a) it's genetic - see above and (b) she's still too little to do some of those things, even if she acts and sounds like a bigger kid most days. Hang in there!

[FO4UR]

ETA: I don't know that there is anything left to say about this topic, but for anyone who is joining in late: before you reply, please carefully read my post. I'm not venting about my child, I'm asking about normal child development. When I posted, I DIDN'T know what was normal. That was the POINT. ;) Most of us get frustrated, even when we know it's not our child's fault. We don't excuse our frustration, so we try to understand the situation so we can respond better in the future. Also, there are a great many educational philosophies and methods on this board. Unless someone is clearly being excessive and abusive, I would sincerely hope that people would show the respect to others regarding methods that they would want to receive themselves. If someone doing a workbook with a two year old for five minutes a day is THAT offensive to you, I'm not sure I am the one that needs to lighten up, IMNSHO. It is absolutely beyond me why I should need to point this out, but if someone is a domineering, insensitive parent, they're not going to make a post asking for wisdom on if behavior is normal or not, are they?? They're going to say, "How do I force my child to do this, because they are stupid/naughty/willful/whatever, and they need to knock it off?"

 

There must be SOMETHING I can do to help with this. Dd is driving me NUTS. I'm trying really hard to be patient, but sometimes it's so hard. I break down instructions as much as I possibly can (e.g. instead of "get the book," I'll say "look at your feet, right next to your foot, the blue book, right there, no, LOOK at your FEET, your FEET, look DOWN....."). I have noticed that she will give the wrong answer to something even when she knows the answer (e.g. colors), but will give the right answer if I help her refocus somehow ("no, what color?" and point). She does this with casual conversation too, actually.... I have started literally pointing at my mouth to give her a place to focus when I tell her to do something. It seems to help.

 

Is this typical 2 1/2 y.o. attention issue stuff? My dh has ADHD (inattentive type), and I wouldn't do anything differently now even if she did have it, but I still have it on my radar as she grows.

 

ETA: Sorry this is getting so long. I wanted to add that none of this is for lack of trying on her part. It's not that she doesn't care, or wants to do something else. She is trying to do what I am asking, but it's not connecting! She looks right at me, and attempts what I'm asking, it just doesn't at all resemble what I'm telling her. :(

 

 

I haven't read the whole thread b/c I wanted to reply to your OP specifically.

 

I don't think you should *worry* about any of this now. Generally speaking, I wouldn't expect a 2yo to follow through with a verbal command unless it was something done on a near daily basis. My dc could do things like "go to your chair" and "come to mommy"... basically things we've done together for days and days on end...the task was learned first with me and THEN they could follow a verbal cue. My 2yo's could not follow a string of verbal directions to save their precious little lives! My dc would find their feet and be so happy and proud about their feet that they wouldn't care what I said next...that is COMPLETELY NORMAL!

 

Kumon books...I find them best suited for 4-5yo's. (the tracing and coloring and pasting) My dd was advanced with fm skills at 2-3yo and I didn't get those books for her until she was almost 4yo. They are much more fun and beneficial when the child can do the first few pages easily by themselves.

 

I suggest building listening skills gently and naturally. Play little games..."I spy a red ball, a bunny storybook, a baby doll, etc"(one at a time)...keep it a *game* and sneakily inch up on the object to give her a visual clue if she's completely lost. Clap and hooray, and she will want to play this little game for a long while...after which those skills will grow into what you are trying to teach right now...it just takes time.

 

I've found that all those little nursery rhymes and fingerplays from generations past are actually right on target for teaching many preschool skills for the 2-5yo age-range.

 

I've also found that I can compare teaching a little one to banking...the teacher must make LOTS and LOTS of "deposits" before expecting a "withdrawal." In fact, I wouldn't put it on a 2yo's shoulders AT ALL to recall colors/shapes or anything else... Just keep teaching it in natural and enjoyable ways (If she wants to do the activity over and over again...that means it's natural and enjoyable....if she doesn't, it isn't.;)) and spare her the pressure of showing what she knows on cue. I never assessed their learning by what they could recall upon a verbal quiz, but by how they used what they knew. (I might ask, "Do you want the red or blue ball?" and seeing her point to red saying "wed" would tell me she knew red. The child is completely oblivious to the fact that I care that she knows the color red. )

 

hth and I really enjoyed the Montessori books geared for little ones. Even though I didn't go "all out" Monty, there is a lot of wisdom in *how* she approached early childhood learning. Now is a good time to read read read all these educational philosophies.

[mo2]

OK, I read the first 5 pages and then couldn't take it anymore so I had to quit. I think I get where you are coming from. If it is your first child, you don't always know what to expect. Especially if, like me, you had little contact with young children before you had kids. I was the youngest in my family (even extended family), my parents' friends didn't have young children, we didn't babysit, etc. I had no idea what to expect. Apparently my first child was a late talker, but I was blissfully unaware of what she was "supposed" to be doing. Anyway, no advice, just that I understand.

[EthiopianFood]

I suggest building listening skills gently and naturally. Play little games..."I spy a red ball, a bunny storybook, a baby doll, etc"(one at a time)...keep it a *game* and sneakily inch up on the object to give her a visual clue if she's completely lost. Clap and hooray, and she will want to play this little game for a long while...after which those skills will grow into what you are trying to teach right now...it just takes time.

 

She LOVES I Spy books. I should see if she can do them without first seeing the little picture (she does the Early Reader ones that have a picture, obviously), just based on verbal description....

 

(If she wants to do the activity over and over again...that means it's natural and enjoyable....if she doesn't, it isn't.;))

 

This is encouraging. She did six pages in various Kumon books yesterday, and I had to just put it away because I don't want to use them up in a week! :001_huh: I think she likes the pretty graphics. :D

 

 

hth and I really enjoyed the Montessori books geared for little ones. Even though I didn't go "all out" Monty, there is a lot of wisdom in *how* she approached early childhood learning. Now is a good time to read read read all these educational philosophies.

 

I'm big on Montessori, too! I wish the equipment didn't cost so much though. :glare: We do the best we can with it, though!

[EthiopianFood]

OK, I read the first 5 pages and then couldn't take it anymore so I had to quit.

 

:lol::lol::lol:

[Jean in Newcastle]

I'm big on Montessori, too! I wish the equipment didn't cost so much though. :glare: We do the best we can with it, though!

 

Did you know that there is a Montessori social group? It's called "Exploring Montessori" - go to Community - Social Groups - Exploring Montessori (or something like that)

[Tidbits of Learning]

I read through a lot of the pages but got tired. It seems to me you are asking what is developmentally appropriate-not what we think should be done with a 2 yr. old.

These go in first year (0-1),second year (1-2), third year (2-3)...I am going to copy from third year for you which is from the beginning of turning 2 until turning 3.

Developmental Concepts Checklist Ages 0-6

Third Year

 

 

• Walks on tiptoes/heels
  
• Jumps
  
• Hops
  
• Jumps over
  
• Throws
  
• Catches
  
• Walks downstairs, one foot leading
  

 

 

 

• Responds to in, on, out, off, little and to two-objects commands and two-action commands
  
• Speaks in sentences
  
• Uses verbs and prepositions
  
• Speaks understandably
  
• Asks questions
  
• Shows fluency in speech
  

 

 

 

• Strings large beads
  
• Hammers pegs
  
• Snips paper
  
• Matches objects by shape
  
• Imitates motor sequences
  
• Does a 3-piece puzzle
  

 

 

 

• Draws circles and plus signs
  
• Traces lines
  
• Imitates loop stroke
  

 

 

 

• Matches capital letters
  
• Tears apart and/or puts together
  

 

 

 

• Begins rote counting
  
• Gets drink by self
  
• Pours from pitcher to cup
  
• Dresses self
  
• Washes hands/face
  

 

 

 

• Knows age
  
• Uses toilet independently
  

 

 

 

• Defends verbally
  
• Plays with peers
  
• Shares and takes turns
  
• Points to body parts
  

 

Here are the instructions that came with it. This is a checklist that I have with spots for you to document your child's age when accomplishing each task.

 

Instructions

Developmental Concepts Checklist, Ages 0-6

Use this checklist to record your child's growth and development. These are excellent records and offer reference for developing your following year's program. Fill in your child's age in the blank space as to when he begins the listed activities.

There is little need for concern if your child has severe difficulty doing only two or three activities in each group. However, if your child is late in doing a majority of the age-level activities, you would be wise to bring this to the attention of your child's physician.

 

This list is great and I tried to skip a line so you could tell when the categories broke up. If anyone wants me to, I will scan it in and make it a pdf. I hope it helps the original poster.

[Tidbits of Learning]

I'm big on Montessori, too! I wish the equipment didn't cost so much though. :glare: We do the best we can with it, though!

 

There is a book called "Teach me to do it myself: Montessori activities for you and your child."

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Teach-Me-to-Do-It-Myself/Maja-Pitamic/e/9780764127892/?itm=1&USRI=teach+me+to+do+it+myself

It has ways to make the Montessori materials yourself on the cheap. It is worth it.

[Tap]

There is a book called "Teach me to do it myself: Montessori activities for you and your child."

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Teach-Me-to-Do-It-Myself/Maja-Pitamic/e/9780764127892/?itm=1&USRI=teach+me+to+do+it+myself

It has ways to make the Montessori materials yourself on the cheap. It is worth it.

 

 

I agree. There are a lot of "Montessori recommended materials" and while fabulous, not exactly necessary. Yes, if I was starting a school, I would invest in $30 kid size brooms and dust pans....but for home, no. The $10 set is just fine and will still be in good shape after one child uses it. LOL

 

I made or bought knock offs of a lot of Montessori items. There is no magic in most of it, just a concept that is well executed.

[sunflower0607]

I have 3 children. My first could and did sit down and do workbooks at 2 yrs old. That was her "Thing" which is why those books are for ages 2-4. For those kids who's interest is academic stuff. She knew her whole alphabet, could count to 20, knew her shapes, could spell her name, knew her colors, and was potty trained, all before her second birthday!

 

So imagine my expectations when I had my second child, the poor thing, I just felt like she was BELOW average because my first was so gifted!

 

My second will be 4 this week. The darling little girl will stare at me like a deer in headlights when I ask her things/she asks me something and forgets that I just answered her. I too wonder if she would be the child labeled ADHD if she went to school. But I just grew to understand that she isn't the academic child. She didn't even know 1 color by her 2nd birthday nor ANY of the other stuff listed for my first!! But as she gets older, I see her other gifts. She is very imaginative (my first wasn't at all), witty, compassionate, plays independently well (my first didn't). And in her own time, she has learned her alphabet, colors, numbers to 12, shapes is potty trained, spells her name, and always walks around pointing out when things rhyme. It just was on her own time table. We spend very little time using workbooks. We pull them out when she is interested. I try to get different things, more hands on to keep her interested in learning. That seems to help.

 

My third, just turned 2 and he is more like my first (though not at the gifted level) he just listens well, it almost seems amazing how well he listens because my 2nd just doesn't listen well at all!

 

Hope this is helpful in maybe showing you that she will do it in her time. There is no harm in trying but don't let learning time become a time of stress at an age where so much learning can come naturally, you don't want her to grow to dislike school. Every day I am sure you have tons of moments with natural learning. When you give her 3 crackers, after she eats one you can count them with her and say "Now you have 2", little things like that will teach her. With my almost 4 yr old, we don't even do "cirriculum" every day, but when we do, on her time, when her little mind is "there" we could end up doing it for an hour! Often times it is just 5-10 min, but she asks for it. That shows a desire for leaning, and that is afterall what we want, right?