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Depressed and anxious.


Miss Peregrine
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The past 2 days I have been feeling really down, and anxiety has been high. Can't sleep at night, just absolutely blah. I thought it was just the stress of dealing with an unethical contractor who damaged our car but then I remembered that today is my dad's birthday. 

 

He died 11 years ago. Our relationship was painful. Still is. 

 

Then I remembered that this happens every year around and including his birthday. Until I remember what day it is. So strange that my body knows, even when I seemingly have no clue. No wonder I thought of a particularly hurtful event the other day.

 

Anyway.

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:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

 

My father died close to the time that yours did.  We did not have a good relationship.  I had to work through the memories to remove the pain.  Now there is mostly just sadness for the fact that the relationship was not what it should have been.  I think of him especially on his birthday and on the anniversary of his death.

 

He was in the Army.  I realized that I could be proud of him as a soldier, even if I couldn't be proud of him as a father.

 

OP, I hope that you can work through your memories to come to a place of peace.

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:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

My father died close to the time that yours did. We did not have a good relationship. I had to work through the memories to remove the pain. Now there is mostly just sadness for the fact that the relationship was not what it should have been. I think of him especially on his birthday and on the anniversary of his death.

 

He was in the Army. I realized that I could be proud of him as a soldier, even if I couldn't be proud of him as a father.

 

OP, I hope that you can work through your memories to come to a place of peace.

Mine was in the Marines and fought in Vietnam :)

 

Very strange but I am reminded of him all the time. My 18yo ds pronounces some words just like him, has this way of laughing, with facial expression that is exactly like my dad and is a copy of his mechanical/inventive personality. Genetics are a strange thing as my son was only around him a handful of times as a baby.

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