Just FYI

[PronghornD]

15 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:

Yeah, I went and checked it just now.

Like I said, I don't have an opinion on the specifics. ETA I'm certainly not suggesting you needed anyone to run interference. I'm just thinking of other situations that have very much felt like that, none of which involved you or, indeed, the OP.

In general, there are always people 'jumping in', 'answering for' others in threads, especially contentious ones.

We like it when we're being defended or agreed with, we don't like it when we aren't.

Or maybe I'm the only hypocrite in the village 🙂

Or I'm missing the 'joke' about the OP, which is possible, because half the time I've got no idea what people are chatting about elsewhere. 

 

I did joke about how the OP was "suspicious." Just trying to inject some levity and get us to not be at war over communication styles.

Edited January 20, 2023 by PronghornD

[Melissa Louise]

Just now, PronghornD said:

I did joke about how the OP was suspicious. Just trying to inject some levity and get us to not be at war over communication styles.

Oh, I don't really 'get' the jokes here. There's a lot of in-group stuff that goes over my head.

Again, I was just musing generally.

Sounds as if I have misread the purpose of the thread as it developed.

 

[Scarlett]

27 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:

Oh, I don't really 'get' the jokes here. There's a lot of in-group stuff that goes over my head.

Again, I was just musing generally.

Sounds as if I have misread the purpose of the thread as it developed.

 

I mean, I clearly don’t get the in group stuff either. Clearly I don’t know who Pin is. But I can tell from conversations she IS someone. 

[katilac]

2 hours ago, Melissa Louise said:

But I have no idea how online conversation is meant to work.  

The biggest thing to remember is that anyone can participate on a public thread. Nobody has to quit posting just bc you (general you) say so. 

If you don't want to see that person's posts, make use of the Ignore button. 

If you want a public conversation, you create a public post. If you want a private conversation, you send a private message. 

Edited January 20, 2023 by katilac

[SKL]

Sometimes the poster to which you replied might not return to the conversation (or might return much later), so rather than leave a question open indefinitely, another person might suggest a possible answer.  The original poster you quoted can always come back and answer for her/himself.

Also, depending on the situation, it may not be obvious that your question is only open to the person you quoted. 

The discussion this post stems from had many aspects and perspectives to it.  Many questions could appropriately be answered in multiple ways by multiple people.

I think we may have different ideas of quoting etiquette.  Sometimes I quote someone because s/he inspired a new line of thought that I'd like to develop further, and not just with the person I quoted.

ETA if you were only talking about the "Chinese school" comment, I can see that wasn't an opening to a whole new aspect of the original discussion in the other thread.  However, I sense you are not just talking about that one situation, but all situations where different posters respond to a quote-question post.

Edited January 20, 2023 by SKL

[Melissa Louise]

27 minutes ago, katilac said:

The biggest thing to remember is that anyone can participate on a public thread. Nobody has to quit posting just bc you (general you) say so. 

If you don't want to see that person's posts, make use of the Ignore button. 

If you want a public conversation, you create a public post. If you want a private conversation, you send a private message. 

Oh, I do those things! 99.9% of the time.

It's more the social flow that's confusing, kwim?

It's been good learning about the quote thing.

[SKL]

And I've had people answer "for me" in similar situations, clarifying facts that get fuzzy for people who don't know me personally.  For example, once someone commented that I had adopted from Continent X and some people responded that they thought it was Continent Y.  It was somewhat relevant to the conversation and I didn't get back to the boards until much later, so the "interference" was helpful.

In the situation that prompted this thread, if someone else hadn't jumped in with an answer first, I might have done so.  I felt you had simply misinterpreted what was typed, and it was relevant enough to be corrected as soon as possible IMO.

[Carrie12345]

8 hours ago, Melissa Louise said:

Someone needs to do their PhD on the anthropological aspects of homeschool message boards, lol

Look. I’m only still in week one of working towards an AA. I have a research topics list in my little notebook, but it’s gonna be a while.

[freesia]

8 hours ago, Melissa Louise said:

Oh, I don't really 'get' the jokes here. There's a lot of in-group stuff that goes over my head.

Again, I was just musing generally.

Sounds as if I have misread the purpose of the thread as it developed.

 

Melissa, I don’t think that an in joke. It’s just a very American kind of joke. The cultural differences in subtle humor are probably more a factor in you feeling that way. I’ve felt it when living in Ireland and Canada, where the language is the same, but humor just slightly different. Mirroring over the top words (often rigid words)back in a bit of a silly way is used (sometimes sarcastically but often as gentle humor) to get the user to lighten up, smile and head in a less contentious direction. ( laugh at themselves a bit).  

[Pawz4me]

1 minute ago, freesia said:

Melissa, I don’t think that an in joke. It’s just a very American kind of joke. The cultural differences in subtle humor are probably more a factor in you feeling that way. I’ve felt it when living in Ireland and Canada, where the language is the same, but humor just slightly different. Mirroring over the top words (often rigid words)back in a bit of a silly way is used (sometimes sarcastically but often as gentle humor) to get the user to lighten up, smile and head in a less contentious direction. ( laugh at themselves a bit).  

In reading this thread I've been wondering how much cultural differences are a factor. Even within the US there are varying conversation styles. Cultural differences plus all the challenges that come with written communication can certainly be messy at times.

I also wonder why people on a well educated board are so quick to assume offense or something like in groups/out groups rather than to consider that there may be other benign factors at play.

[Guest]

11 hours ago, pinball said:

Just FYI, I was specifically told to start a new thread by a moderator

You were told to start a new thread *about trans issues* by a moderator. This isn’t that. 

[pinball]

8 hours ago, Melissa Louise said:

Oh, I don't really 'get' the jokes here. There's a lot of in-group stuff that goes over my head.

Again, I was just musing generally.

Sounds as if I have misread the purpose of the thread as it developed.

 

I’m missing the jokes, too, here.

The purpose of the thread was to say what I think when someone answers for someone else, here on the board.

I then added what I think when someone answers for someone else in real life IRL…it’s actually 2 different things.

[pinball]

2 minutes ago, Quill said:

You were told to start a new thread *about trans issues* by a moderator. This isn’t that. 

“If you want to discuss the nature of conversation or anything else this thread isn't about, go make your own thread.”
 

[Danae]

As a point of reference, I also parsed @PronghornD’s “little Chinese school classmate” as “school classmate who is Chinese” not “classmate at Chinese school.”

That seems to have been the drop that set off this particular tangent on communicative ethics.  

[PronghornD]

17 minutes ago, Danae said:

As a point of reference, I also parsed @PronghornD’s “little Chinese school classmate” as “school classmate who is Chinese” not “classmate at Chinese school.”

That seems to have been the drop that set off this particular tangent on communicative ethics.  

Maybe I needed a hyphen? Did you also find the comment that the kid was little odd?

[PronghornD]

21 minutes ago, Danae said:

As a point of reference, I also parsed @PronghornD’s “little Chinese school classmate” as “school classmate who is Chinese” not “classmate at Chinese school.”

That seems to have been the drop that set off this particular tangent on communicative ethics.  

Calling someone a school classmate seems oddly redundant, though I suppose many people write redundantly.

[Guest]

42 minutes ago, pinball said:

“If you want to discuss the nature of conversation or anything else this thread isn't about, go make your own thread.”
 

That was after you had already been told to leave your irrelevant commenting and go make a new thread. It was the second time you were addressed by Rosie and told to stop harping on irrelevant details. 

[PronghornD]

1 hour ago, pinball said:

I’m missing the jokes, too, here.

The purpose of the thread was to say what I think when someone answers for someone else, here on the board.

I then added what I think when someone answers for someone else in real life IRL…it’s actually 2 different things.

I am sorry -- I thought you were catching the humor. Exaggeration is often used as a form of humor, and I thought my exaggerations were over-the-top enough to be obvious.

Could I have a show of hands? How many people thought I was being serious when I brought up being a top-secret spy? And did anyone call the authorities on me?

Edited January 20, 2023 by PronghornD
Edited to include a hyphen, lest we spawn another thread for lack of it lol.

[MercyA]

10 hours ago, Melissa Louise said:

In the most egregious case of this paternalistic (maternal?) 'jumping in', I thought it was very infantilizing of the person being 'protected'.

See, this never would have occurred to me in a million years--that someone would feel put down by someone else defending them. I would have guessed it would be the opposite!

I'm sorry if I've done this to anyone and inadvertently caused offense.

[PronghornD]

2 hours ago, Pawz4me said:

In reading this thread I've been wondering how much cultural differences are a factor. Even within the US there are varying conversation styles. Cultural differences plus all the challenges that come with written communication can certainly be messy at times.

I also wonder why people on a well educated board are so quick to assume offense or something like in groups/out groups rather than to consider that there may be other benign factors at play.

I found the reference to in groups and out groups kind of amusing when discussing my jokes. I feel very much part of an out group myself in this forum. But then I thought I am perhaps part of an in group in the sense of having read both of the relevant threads and feeling fully informed of their content.

[MercyA]

Is anyone else starting to wonder if they are "in" or "out"? Am I allowed to wear pink on Wednesdays? Or is that just for the cool kids? I have definitely been on the outs at times, I know that! 

Seriously, not making light of anyone's feelings, but I agree with PronghornD that a lot of it comes down to having been around a while and reading popular threads.

I love you all, by the way, even if you don't love me back. 😉 ❤️

[PronghornD]

Deleted due to technical issues.

Edited January 20, 2023 by PronghornD
Attempting to delete quotes!!!

[PronghornD]

Please excuse that last post. I am so much part of the out group that I don't know the technical aspects of this forum. I would delete it if I could, and I really wanted to delete the quotes and just make a quick comment. How in the world do you get rid of a quote once the forum decides you are intending to quote someone?

So, now I am working on my new politically-correct-for-this-forum language skills. My new version of the troublesome quote: "young weekly-language-school classmate. How is that? I have stripped out any reference to the ethnicity of the school, lest someone think I am prejudiced against any ethnicities. I have replaced little with young, because size is irrelevant. Perhaps some may think the youth of the participants is irrelevant, but I think it should be in there. People can be excused for undesirable behavior based on their youth, and of course these issues of belonging or not belonging do start young.

Anyone still interested is welcome to suggest even better alternatives for the proper language etiquette.

For anyone not understanding, this post is less than half serious. I still want to be lighthearted about communication snafus. After all, it is not likely that anyone is writing unclearly on purpose or misunderstanding on purpose. Let's all give each other the benefit of the doubt as much as possible!

[MercyA]

8 minutes ago, PronghornD said:

Please excuse that last post. I am so much part of the out group that I don't know the technical aspects of this forum. I would delete it if I could, and I really wanted to delete the quotes and just make a quick comment. How in the world do you get rid of a quote once the forum decides you are intending to quote someone?

Go to "Edit." Copy anything you want to save. Delete everything out of the post, quote boxes and all. Paste back in the bit you really want. Quotes can be really wonky!

p.s. If you want to delete the whole thing, do it and replace with "nm" (never mind) or whatever else you want.

Edited January 20, 2023 by MercyA

[PronghornD]

1 minute ago, MercyA said:

Go to "Edit." Copy anything you want to save. Delete everything out of the post. Paste back in the bit you really want. Quotes can be really wonky!

I know about going to edit. I don't see how to delete everything out of the post, though. I can delete what I wrote but not the quotes.

[MercyA]

Just now, PronghornD said:

I know about going to edit. I don't see how to delete everything out of the post, though. I can delete what I wrote but not the quotes.

Can you highlight everything and hit "delete"? Go backwards with the delete button all the way to the top of the post?

[PronghornD]

Just now, MercyA said:

Can you highlight everything and hit "delete"? Go backwards with the delete button all the way to the top of the post?

I did it! I couldn't highlight but used the backspace on my keyboard. Maybe now I AM part of the in crowd lol.

[MercyA]

Okay, @PronghornD, I just tried it with one of my own posts containing a quote. You might need to click on or select the quote box and then hit delete, but it will go away.

Edited January 20, 2023 by MercyA

[PronghornD]

Just another quick angle on humor. I think sometimes a person also uses humor to handle their own emotional responses. When Pinball questioned my mention of a Chinese school classmate, I did feel she was implying that I was somehow being prejudiced against Chinese people. She did not say it openly, but that would be what would make an awkward phrasing worthy of public correction. So, perhaps part of me felt a bit irritated. Humor is a way to bring myself out of that irritation, to remind even myself not to get too hung up on small things.

[Danae]

1 hour ago, PronghornD said:

Just another quick angle on humor. I think sometimes a person also uses humor to handle their own emotional responses. When Pinball questioned my mention of a Chinese school classmate, I did feel she was implying that I was somehow being prejudiced against Chinese people. She did not say it openly, but that would be what would make an awkward phrasing worthy of public correction. So, perhaps part of me felt a bit irritated. Humor is a way to bring myself out of that irritation, to remind even myself not to get too hung up on small things.

I mean, yes, probably?  “Little Chinese school classmate” if you parse it the way at least some of us did sounds a lot like Uncle Bob (hypothetical name) always referring to the only non-white kid in the neighborhood as “that little Chinese girl.”  So (at risk of stepping in for Pinball!) I read her response as suggesting you consider whether your phrasing was racially biased. 

[SKL]

10 minutes ago, Danae said:

I mean, yes, probably?  “Little Chinese school classmate” if you parse it the way at least some of us did sounds a lot like Uncle Bob (hypothetical name) always referring to the only non-white kid in the neighborhood as “that little Chinese girl.”  So (at risk of stepping in for Pinball!) I read her response as suggesting you consider whether your phrasing was racially biased. 

And that is why someone stepped in and clarified the likely intent.  🙂

[PronghornD]

12 minutes ago, Danae said:

I mean, yes, probably?  “Little Chinese school classmate” if you parse it the way at least some of us did sounds a lot like Uncle Bob (hypothetical name) always referring to the only non-white kid in the neighborhood as “that little Chinese girl.”  So (at risk of stepping in for Pinball!) I read her response as suggesting you consider whether your phrasing was racially biased. 

 "School classmate" still sounds kind of bizarre to me, though. Would Uncle Bob (or anyone else) call someone a "school classmate" ? I really think a person should pause and look carefully at words before accusing someone of bias.

Edited January 20, 2023 by PronghornD

[pinball]

I got lunch today at a new restaurant, a fast casual place where the customer points to the ingredients she wants and the worker makes the plate as the customer watches.

There was a sauce I was unfamiliar with so I asked the worker *who was helping me* what the sauce was made of and a different worker, who was helping someone else, turned to me and loudly answered as the worker who was helping me was answering.

i wish I could duplicate the discouraged look on my worker’s face. There was no reason for his co-worker to jump in and talk over him.

[PronghornD]

12 minutes ago, pinball said:

I got lunch today at a new restaurant, a fast casual place where the customer points to the ingredients she wants and the worker makes the plate as the customer watches.

There was a sauce I was unfamiliar with so I asked the worker *who was helping me* what the sauce was made of and a different worker, who was helping someone else, turned to me and loudly answered as the worker who was helping me was answering.

i wish I could duplicate the discouraged look on my worker’s face. There was no reason for his co-worker to jump in and talk over him.

The issue online is a bit different, though. It is more like if one employee went to the back to get something while another employee, in the interest of providing prompt answers, answered a question. On the boards here, someone didn't want to leave an implication of racism hanging too long, so they gave their opinion while I was off doing something else.

Your example does provide some insight into real-life issues with answering other people's questions.

[pinball]

1 minute ago, PronghornD said:

The issue online is a bit different, though. It is more like if one employee went to the back to get something while another employee, in the interest of providing prompt answers, answered a question. On the boards here, someone didn't want to leave an implication of racism hanging too long, so they gave their opinion while I was off doing something else.

Your example does provide some insight into real-life issues with answering other people's questions.

I did distinguish my thoughts about the difference between online and IRL last night. 
 

 

[PronghornD]

11 minutes ago, pinball said:

I did distinguish my thoughts about the difference between online and IRL last night. 
 

 

Yes, you did.

[barnwife]

1 hour ago, PronghornD said:

 "School classmate" still sounds kind of bizarre to me, though. Would Uncle Bob (or anyone else) call someone a "school classmate" ? I really think a person should pause and look carefully at words before accusing someone of bias.

Except the entire phrase was (apparently, I haven't read that whole thread) "little Chinese school classmate." And it only sounds bizarre if you parse it unkindly. 

A. School Classmate isn't technically redundant, because students can attend the same school but be in different classes.
B. In the phrase used, I am surprised people didn't parse it as "little Chinese-school classmate."  With only a moment's thought, giving a poster the benefit of doubt, that's the kindest reading (after reading it the other way and wondering  "how else could this have been meant?")
C. When I hear a phrase like "Chinese school" (that is, Language School), I hear it as school designed to learn said language. I am very surprised that isn't the default for others. 

So, yes, one should pause and give the benefit of doubt and go with the kindest reading (see B above). But, in this case, that's obviously reading it as in C above. 

If it becomes obvious a poster meant something unkind/racist/insert other possibilities here, it should be addressed kindly, so as to give them something to reflect on and hopefully change their mind/actions in the future.

[EKS]

3 hours ago, PronghornD said:

Let's all give each other the benefit of the doubt as much as possible!

What a concept!

[PronghornD]

7 hours ago, barnwife said:

Except the entire phrase was (apparently, I haven't read that whole thread) "little Chinese school classmate." And it only sounds bizarre if you parse it unkindly. 

A. School Classmate isn't technically redundant, because students can attend the same school but be in different classes.
B. In the phrase used, I am surprised people didn't parse it as "little Chinese-school classmate."  With only a moment's thought, giving a poster the benefit of doubt, that's the kindest reading (after reading it the other way and wondering  "how else could this have been meant?")
C. When I hear a phrase like "Chinese school" (that is, Language School), I hear it as school designed to learn said language. I am very surprised that isn't the default for others. 

So, yes, one should pause and give the benefit of doubt and go with the kindest reading (see B above). But, in this case, that's obviously reading it as in C above. 

If it becomes obvious a poster meant something unkind/racist/insert other possibilities here, it should be addressed kindly, so as to give them something to reflect on and hopefully change their mind/actions in the future.

I am actually the original poster and the one who said school classmate was redundant. I think kids who attend the same school but are in different classes are schoolmates. I think kids who attend the same class are classmates. No additional word is needed to show that the classmates are in the same school. How else would they be classmates? For that reason, I would call it redundant and wonder what the function of the word school was in the sentence. Yes, the school was a Chinese language school!

Edited January 21, 2023 by PronghornD

[KSera]

33 minutes ago, PronghornD said:

The issue online is a bit different, though. It is more like if one employee went to the back to get something while another employee, in the interest of providing prompt answers, answered a question. On the boards here, someone didn't want to leave an implication of racism hanging too long, so they gave their opinion while I was off doing something else.

 

Yes, this. On the forums, one doesn’t know when someone else will be coming back to a thread. It’s entirely possible the thread would’ve moved way on from there before Pronghorn ever saw that comment. It seemed better to clear up the confusion right away
 

[barnwife]

17 minutes ago, PronghornD said:

I am actually the original poster and the one who said school classmate was reductant. I think kids who attend the same school but are in different classes are schoolmates. I think kids who attend the same class are classmates. No additional word is needed to show that the classmates are in the same school. How else would they be classmates? For that reason, I would call it redundant and wonder what the function of the word school was in the sentence. Yes, the school was a Chinese language school!

Well...isn't it obvious then that the function of "school" is to go with "language?" I mean, if one thinks "school classmate" is redundant, then "school" must go with "language" (in this case, Chinese). Try substituting "sport" for "language." If someone said "little fencing school classmate" would people be having the same issues understanding? 

Randomly, the word schoolmate is...odd to me. I don't think I've ever heard it used IRL. 

I don't know, I just can't wrap my mind around it being difficult to read the phrase kindly, even without a hyphen that would have prevented all of this confusion.

[PronghornD]

1 minute ago, barnwife said:

Well...isn't it obvious then that the function of "school" is to go with "language?" I mean, if one thinks "school classmate" is redundant, then "school" must go with "language" (in this case, Chinese). Try substituting "sport" for "language." If someone said "little fencing school classmate" would people be having the same issues understanding? 

Randomly, the word schoolmate is...odd to me. I don't think I've ever heard it used IRL. 

I don't know, I just can't wrap my mind around it being difficult to read the phrase kindly, even without a hyphen that would have prevented all of this confusion.

I don't know. Perhaps people are eager to catch others in errors related to race. We live in a society that's like that, so it might be easy to catch those attitudes accidentally.

[Danae]

1 hour ago, barnwife said:

Well...isn't it obvious then that the function of "school" is to go with "language?" I mean, if one thinks "school classmate" is redundant, then "school" must go with "language" (in this case, Chinese). Try substituting "sport" for "language." If someone said "little fencing school classmate" would people be having the same issues understanding? 

Randomly, the word schoolmate is...odd to me. I don't think I've ever heard it used IRL. 

I don't know, I just can't wrap my mind around it being difficult to read the phrase kindly, even without a hyphen that would have prevented all of this confusion.

I don’t really see the point in saying people shouldn’t have misunderstood the sentence.   It’s not a matter of seeing two possible meanings and choosing the kinder or less kind one, it’s a matter of reading the sentencing and thinking you know what it means but finding out later that’s not what the writer meant.

And no, it was’t obvious to everyone. Obviously.

[Melissa Louise]

@freesia

8 hours ago, freesia said:

Melissa, I don’t think that an in joke. It’s just a very American kind of joke. The cultural differences in subtle humor are probably more a factor in you feeling that way. I’ve felt it when living in Ireland and Canada, where the language is the same, but humor just slightly different. Mirroring over the top words (often rigid words)back in a bit of a silly way is used (sometimes sarcastically but often as gentle humor) to get the user to lighten up, smile and head in a less contentious direction. ( laugh at themselves a bit).  

Oh, that is interesting.

I don't get it, but it's interesting. TY.

[Melissa Louise]

6 hours ago, PronghornD said:

I found the reference to in groups and out groups kind of amusing when discussing my jokes. I feel very much part of an out group myself in this forum. But then I thought I am perhaps part of an in group in the sense of having read both of the relevant threads and feeling fully informed of their content.

See, this I think is just super rude, but maybe it's a joke?

 

8 hours ago, Pawz4me said:

In reading this thread I've been wondering how much cultural differences are a factor. Even within the US there are varying conversation styles. Cultural differences plus all the challenges that come with written communication can certainly be messy at times.

I also wonder why people on a well educated board are so quick to assume offense or something like in groups/out groups rather than to consider that there may be other benign factors at play.

Experience? Observation of the social structures at play?

People say some pretty terrible things to others here, and sometimes they get called out and sometimes they don't, depending on who they are.

 

[Melissa Louise]

In for a penny...

I thought the comment about the classmate was poorly phrased and raised an eyebrow at it. I would not have jumped in to comment negatively on it, but I also wasn't thrilled by it, possibly because it reminded me of a time my dd was called 'your little Indian friend' by a mother at dance to her own daughter.

There was an earlier point made by pinball. IMO, they were pointing out a hypocrisy in the discussion around social contagion. So far as I could see, they did not continue to discuss it when told not to by a mod. I felt that 'offence' was used to undermine a point of logic. But again, I would not have jumped in to comment negatively on it, because it did run the risk of derailing the thread, and because I think OP's do get to say, hey, not on my thread, thanks.

 

[Clarita]

Here I read "little Chinese school classmate" as her child goes to a small Chinese language school. That classmate there was being terrible.  To me if @PronghornDuse of Chinese was referring to the ethnicity of the classmate, it would have read "little Chinese classmate".

[PronghornD]

46 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:

See, this I think is just super rude, but maybe it's a joke?

 

Experience? Observation of the social structures at play?

People say some pretty terrible things to others here, and sometimes they get called out and sometimes they don't, depending on who they are.

 

Could you explain how that comment is rude? I don't get it at all. What rude implication is there? It was not a joke but more an explanation of how I mentally interacted with what it means to be part of an in or out group here.

Anyone is welcome to respond if they see how it is rude. It need not be the poster.

Edited January 20, 2023 by PronghornD

[PronghornD]

11 minutes ago, PronghornD said:

Could you explain how that comment is rude? I don't get it at all. What rude implication is there? It was not a joke but more an explanation of how I mentally interacted with what it means to be part of an in or out group here.

Anyone is welcome to respond if they see how it is rude. It need not be the poster.

Just a quick addendum. While I was not joking, I also don't take being part of an in group or out group very seriously at all. So, it is not like I am intending to brag or anything. I was more musing on how a person might be perceived as being part of an in group just by putting in the time to read an entire thread.

[Farrar]

29 minutes ago, PronghornD said:

Could you explain how that comment is rude? I don't get it at all. What rude implication is there? It was not a joke but more an explanation of how I mentally interacted with what it means to be part of an in or out group here.

Anyone is welcome to respond if they see how it is rude. It need not be the poster.

I also don't understand how a reflection on yourself and your forum behavior that doesn't even refer to anyone else could possibly be perceived as rude.