S/O fashion—am I wrong to be offended by this?

[popmom]

I’m not sure “offended” is the right word. Troubled might be better. It’s different than “destroyed denim” you can get at the Gap. Holes in jeans have always been a thing. This is different. Much different imo.
 

Destroyed sweaters for $1700

Golden Goose Sneakers—all the rage among college girls. $500-700.

 

 

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[Arcadia]

Both brands are status symbols though there are people who genuinely like some of those items. 

The destroyed sweater is by Balenciaga while I know people in my age group who are into Golden Goose sneakers. 
 

[alisoncooks]

Snort. I have some similarly distressed sneakers I’ll let someone have for a steal! Only $100!! 😉 

(fwiw, I don’t expect to understand trends like that. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve spent over $100 on shoes…and I cringed mightily while doing it.)

Edited March 2, 2022 by alisoncooks

[athena1277]

I’m pretty sure I can find a sweater just like that at a thrift store.  No, maybe not.  Thrift stores don’t sell stuff that worn out looking.

[popmom]

12 minutes ago, Arcadia said:

Both brands are status symbols though there are people who genuinely like some of those items. 

The destroyed sweater is by Balenciaga while I know people in my age group who are into Golden Goose sneakers. 
 

I understand it’s a status symbol. Clearly.  It feels like a very inappropriate appropriation of poverty. I don’t understand why this is encouraged or accepted. Maybe I’m wrong to assume this, but I’m imagining that someone who buys this can afford to tout luxury beliefs and claim outrage about other types of cultural appropriation.

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[Shoeless]

A lot of wealthy-people clothes or high-fashion clothes are kind of ugly, IMO. Rich people can wear dirty looking shoes and ripped up sweaters, and it's "a statement". I wear that stuff and I look like a bag lady.

I thought a lot of the clothes on Sex and the City were butt-ugly, too.

[Arcadia]

8 minutes ago, popmom said:

I understand it’s a status symbol. Clearly.  It feels like a very inappropriate appropriation of poverty. I don’t understand why this is encouraged or accepted.

I didn’t see where those were encouraged. I think people who thinks it is appropriation whether of poverty (or cultural) has always voiced out their opinions. Fashion houses would always tend to have products for shock value. 

[lauraw4321]

I’m offended. So at least you have company. It’s gross. 

[Jean in Newcastle]

I don’t know why you would care. It’s a very small subset of very rich people. Not the kind of people I ever come in contact with. 

[popmom]

53 minutes ago, Arcadia said:

I didn’t see where those were encouraged. I think people who thinks it is appropriation whether of poverty (or cultural) has always voiced out their opinions. Fashion houses would always tend to have products for shock value. 

It’s encouraged through advertising. And by “influencers” on social media. 
 

I get shock value—I know that’s what this is. So an artist paints with urine or excrement and calls it art. That’s shock value, too. I tried to communicate my reasoning above as to why this is different.

I was always really bothered by “heroin chic”, too, but not as much as this for some reason.

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[popmom]

10 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

I don’t know why you would care. It’s a very small subset of very rich people. Not the kind of people I ever come in contact with. 

idk, Jean, I guess the dignity of those actually living in dire poverty is a thing for me. 🤷🏼‍♀️

 

It’s not nearly as small a subset as you think. My daughters see Golden Goose sneakers all over campus. 
 

 

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[AnneGG]

Nvm I didn’t click the links

and I don’t wanna 😆

Edited March 2, 2022 by AnneGG

[popmom]

1 minute ago, AnneGG said:

Nvm I didn’t click the links

and I don’t wanna 😆

I would be clueless if not for my kids and the fact that I have bought shoes at Nordstrom, so this stuff comes in my email! 😂

[Ting Tang]

57 minutes ago, popmom said:

I’m not sure “offended” is the right word. It’s different than “destroyed denim” you can get at the Gap. Holes in jeans have always been a thing. This is different. Much different imo.
 

Destroyed sweaters for $1700

Golden Goose Sneakers—all the rage among college girls. $500-700.

 

 

I can’t get to the shoes due to slow internet, but that sweater… it’s offends me to ask people to pay that much for that. And I’d never donate used clothing that was ripped, torn, or stained. 

Edited March 2, 2022 by Ting Tang

[Grace Hopper]

I’m offended by the price tags!

But seriously, OP, I see your point. I’d be more concerned if this sweater were around the $200 price point, because that would make it more affordable among the set of folks that actually have an influence on my teen. 

[popmom]

1 minute ago, Grace Hopper said:

I’m offended by the price tags!

But seriously, OP, I see your point. I’d be more concerned if this sweater were around the $200 price point, because that would make it more affordable among the set of folks that actually have an influence on my teen. 

Good point about the price point. Although I’m shocked at how many “regular folks” are sporting those sneakers—college girls and young women/moms.

[Frances]

1 hour ago, popmom said:

I understand it’s a status symbol. Clearly.  It feels like a very inappropriate appropriation of poverty. I don’t understand why this is encouraged or accepted. Maybe I’m wrong to assume this, but I’m imagining that someone who buys this can afford to tout luxury beliefs and claim outrage about other types of cultural appropriation.

What does “can afford to tout luxury beliefs” even mean?

Why do you think they would care at all about any type of cultural appropriation, let alone claim outrage?

[Arcadia]

4 minutes ago, popmom said:

Good point about the price point. Although I’m shocked at how many “regular folks” are sporting those sneakers—college girls and young women/moms.

Golden Goose have outlets online and in premium outlets. I live quite near a premium outlet with a Golden Goose store. Also the prices online after discount is like $152-184 (47 to 70% off)

https://www.golden-gooses.com
 

Saks Off 5th also have golden goose sneakers on clearance in store. 

[Frances]

12 minutes ago, popmom said:

Good point about the price point. Although I’m shocked at how many “regular folks” are sporting those sneakers—college girls and young women/moms.

Where do you live that you are seeing so many people wearing the shoes? 

[SKL]

So that's what those garbage pickers on my treelawn were after!

[Melissa Louise]

It's pretty gross. 

It brings to mind the classism and racism double standard. Rich and white? Show your status with $2k holey sweaters. Poor or Black, we'll judge you for your $5 sweater from the thrift store because it's got a hole. 

 

[AnneGG]

22 minutes ago, popmom said:

I would be clueless if not for my kids and the fact that I have bought shoes at Nordstrom, so this stuff comes in my email! 😂

FWIW I worked at Free People and American Apparel in college. Never have I ever purchased new tights with runs in the them and shoes designed with chew marks. Never have I ever bought a shirt that was pre pilled. 
 

Now I’m just a regular mom that buys leggings at the grocery store and unintentionally wears baby spit up.

[popmom]

7 minutes ago, Frances said:

Where do you live that you are seeing so many people wearing the shoes? 

southeast US where women in particular have always been what I call "trend obsessed". It was actually a contributing factor in my decision to home school.

[Frances]

1 minute ago, popmom said:

southeast US where women in particular have always been what I call "trend obsessed". It was actually a contributing factor in my decision to home school.

Here in the PNW every day is a casual day. I love it.

[gardenmom5]

1 hour ago, popmom said:

I’m not sure “offended” is the right word. Troubled might be better. It’s different than “destroyed denim” you can get at the Gap. Holes in jeans have always been a thing. This is different. Much different imo.
 

Destroyed sweaters for $1700

Golden Goose Sneakers—all the rage among college girls. $500-700.

 

 

a fool and their money are soon parted.

[popmom]

Just now, Frances said:

Here in the PNW every day is a casual day. I love it.

That's everyday in my house lol. 🙂 But I still occasionally succumb to the "never leave the house without lipstick" rule.

 

[Frances]

1 minute ago, popmom said:

That's everyday in my house lol. 🙂 But I still occasionally succumb to the "never leave the house without lipstick" rule.

 

I don’t own any lipstick, so I guess it’s a good thing I don’t live where you do, otherwise I’d be a hermit.

[popmom]

Just now, Frances said:

I don’t own any lipstick, so I guess it’s a good thing I don’t live where you do, otherwise I’d be a hermit.

oh--well it's perfectly acceptable to dress very casual here as long as it's Lululemon. 😉

I'm exaggerating a bit about southern women. There are plenty of us that are not trend obsessed. Really. Plenty. I have a very, very wealthy friend--older than me and beautiful--I was at her house one night, and her daughters were dying laughing because she had killed a copperhead in their backyard with a shotgun a few minutes before we arrived. That's more my style lol.

[frogger]

1 hour ago, athena1277 said:

I’m pretty sure I can find a sweater just like that at a thrift store.  No, maybe not.  Thrift stores don’t sell stuff that worn out looking.

My dog could help you get the right look with that thrift store sweater. I'll let you borrow her for 20 mins for only $500. It would be a steal!

Hey maybe we could start a business. My kids don't play with the dog as much as she used to and could use a new career. 

[Frances]

1 minute ago, popmom said:

oh--well it's perfectly acceptable to dress very casual here as long as it's Lululemon. 😉

I'm exaggerating a bit about southern women. There are plenty of us that are not trend obsessed. Really. Plenty. I have a very, very wealthy friend--older than me and beautiful--I was at her house one night, and her daughters were dying laughing because she had killed a copperhead in their backyard with a shotgun a few minutes before we arrived. That's more my style lol.

I sure there are women out there capable of shooting a snake while dressed very fashionably. I’m not sure I see them as mutually exclusive or even unrelated.

[popmom]

2 minutes ago, Frances said:

I sure there are women out there capable of shooting a snake while dressed very fashionably. I’m not sure I see them as mutually exclusive or even unrelated.

I agree! She had on her lipstick at the time. 🙂 The difference is she is not a conspicuous consumer. I just appreciate that. Although I'm sure there are conspicuous consumers who can shoot, too, but they probably wouldn't hang out with me. 🙂

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[Ellie]

1 hour ago, popmom said:

I’m not sure “offended” is the right word. Troubled might be better. It’s different than “destroyed denim” you can get at the Gap. Holes in jeans have always been a thing. This is different. Much different imo.
 

Destroyed sweaters for $1700

Golden Goose Sneakers—all the rage among college girls. $500-700.

 

 

Well, no, holes in jeans haven't always been a thing. I promise that none of my friends would have allowed their children to leave the house with holes in their jeans, and that was only in the 70s. Which might seem like a long time to y'all whippersnappers, but nevertheless, that makes it not always a thing. 🙂

And those sweaters are abominable.

[popmom]

Just now, Ellie said:

Well, no, holes in jeans haven't always been a thing. I promise that none of my friends would have allowed their children to leave the house with holes in their jeans, and that was only in the 70s. Which might seem like a long time to y'all whippersnappers, but nevertheless, that makes it not always a thing. 🙂

And those sweaters are abominable.

I hear you. I was born in 1970. 

[SKL]

12 minutes ago, frogger said:

My dog could help you get the right look with that thrift store sweater. I'll let you borrow her for 20 mins for only $500. It would be a steal!

Hey maybe we could start a business. My kids don't play with the dog as much as she used to and could use a new career. 

Yeah, I was thinking that sweater reminded me of my puppy's teething stage.  😛

I may or may not still be wearing the evidence when I take him out back.  (Sewing the pockets back up is on my to-do list.)

[SKL]

Most of my eldest's bottoms are ripped jeans.  She won't wear unripped jeans (sensory stuff).  I actually think she looks cute in her ripped jeans.  😛

I remember when the distressed look was new, and considered ridiculous by those of us who couldn't afford "fashions" but made an effort to keep our humble clothes intact.

I guess it isn't any dumber than any other expensive modern trend.

[popmom]

48 minutes ago, Arcadia said:

Golden Goose have outlets online and in premium outlets. I live quite near a premium outlet with a Golden Goose store. Also the prices online after discount is like $152-184 (47 to 70% off)

https://www.golden-gooses.com
 

Saks Off 5th also have golden goose sneakers on clearance in store. 

Well that definitely explains why we are seeing more of those. Although we don't have an outlet here or off 5th. And I should clarify since I brought up trend obsessed southern women. That destroyed sweater--I don't see that ever being a trend embraced here. It's TOO much. Too extra. And in no way could ever be "cute" like the sneakers can.

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[popmom]

7 minutes ago, SKL said:

Most of my eldest's bottoms are ripped jeans.  She won't wear unripped jeans (sensory stuff).  I actually think she looks cute in her ripped jeans.  😛

I remember when the distressed look was new, and considered ridiculous by those of us who couldn't afford "fashions" but made an effort to keep our humble clothes intact.

I guess it isn't any dumber than any other expensive modern trend.

I hear you. I just don't think that the "it's all relative" makes this one okay. Like I'm astonished when I see a resort somewhere that charges $20K a night, but to that I can say--it's all relative.  I don't know if that makes sense.

Anyway, it's not like I'm losing sleep over it. I was just reminded of it by the other thread and wondered if anyone else felt the same. Not over here organizing protests or anything. 

 

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[mathnerd]

I can set up anyone with a similar sweater for half that price, shipping included! Jokes aside, I grew up with very little and few clothes and I would never spend this amount of money on a sweater, let alone one which looks like rodents chewed on them.

[Farrar]

I feel like there's two totally different issues here that are being conflated.

First, is it offensive/troubling/just bad to have, wear, and hold up purposefully destroyed clothing as fashionable? My answer to that is no. Let people wear what they want. Don't be so judgmental. Just let it go. There's nothing inherently moral about letting your kids go out without holes in their clothes.

Second, is it offensive/troubling/just bad that purposefully destroyed clothing cost so much? My answer is... it's bad that any clothing be that overpriced, but I don't find it MORE offensive that the overpriced fashion have a destroyed look. I understand why some people would - it definitely bespeaks privilege in a sense where some people can wear broken clothes (rich people) and call it fashion while other people (poor people) can't without getting judged for being poor. But... I just don't see that as being a major issue here. Maybe someone could convince me otherwise, but again, I would just default back to the idea that all overpriced fashion is a problem and there's no extra problem with the rundown look.

[popmom]

This is a pretty diverse group, so it's been interesting seeing the responses.

I'm trying to imagine how a homeless person would react if they saw an ad for that sweater. Honestly, they would probably not be as disturbed by it as I am. So I am willing to admit this could be my own "luxury belief". A homeless person would probably (I'm basing this on those I've served as a volunteer) laugh hysterically at any fool who would pay and wear it, but I doubt they would be indignant about it. A log in my eye perhaps.
 

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[regentrude]

Shrug. Any sweater for a thousand bucks is just a ridiculous waste of money. A ripped one is particularly dumb.

One can make the argument that the entire concept of "fashion" is offensive because it's environmentally unsustainable and invites a reckless waste of resources. 

Edited March 2, 2022 by regentrude

[popmom]

1 minute ago, Farrar said:

I feel like there's two totally different issues here that are being conflated.

First, is it offensive/troubling/just bad to have, wear, and hold up purposefully destroyed clothing as fashionable? My answer to that is no. Let people wear what they want. Don't be so judgmental. Just let it go. There's nothing inherently moral about letting your kids go out without holes in their clothes.

Second, is it offensive/troubling/just bad that purposefully destroyed clothing cost so much? My answer is... it's bad that any clothing be that overpriced, but I don't find it MORE offensive that the overpriced fashion have a destroyed look. I understand why some people would - it definitely bespeaks privilege in a sense where some people can wear broken clothes (rich people) and call it fashion while other people (poor people) can't without getting judged for being poor. But... I just don't see that as being a major issue here. Maybe someone could convince me otherwise, but again, I would just default back to the idea that all overpriced fashion is a problem and there's no extra problem with the rundown look.

That's fair. I would agree with that, I think. Thank you. 

I said above that this is maybe my own "luxury belief". 

[popmom]

7 minutes ago, regentrude said:

Shrug. Any sweater for a thousand bucks is just a ridiculous waste of money. A ripped one is particularly dumb.

One can make the argument that the entire concept of "fashion" is offensive because it's environmentally unsustainable. 

I actually think about this when I walk through a shopping mall--which isn't often--, see all the clearance racks full of clothes nobody will buy. just the sheer amount of unnecessary STUFF.  That bothers me, too! Off to go take a chill pill. 😉 

eta: my overthinking brain will then say--well all this provides jobs, etc etc. lol 

hyper sensitive conscience hopefully better than a "seared" conscience.

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[Melissa Louise]

I mean, I guess the other thing is how were these clothes produced? If the workers got a decent wage, I guess they are more ethical, in a way, than cheaper non-holey clothes made by exploited workers. Idk how $ fashion works, and if they pay their workers better at the top of the scale. 

[popmom]

3 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:

I mean, I guess the other thing is how were these clothes produced? If the workers got a decent wage, I guess they are more ethical, in a way, than cheaper non-holey clothes made by exploited workers. Idk how $ fashion works, and if they pay their workers better at the top of the scale. 

good point. 

[Shoeless]

14 minutes ago, popmom said:

I actually think about this when I walk through a shopping mall--which isn't often--, see all the clearance racks full of clothes nobody will buy. just the sheer amount of unnecessary STUFF.  That bothers me, too! Off to go take a chill pill. 😉 

eta: my overthinking brain will then say--well all this provides jobs, etc etc. lol 

hyper sensitive conscience hopefully better than a "seared" conscience.

This is why I buy second hand as much as possible.

[regentrude]

11 minutes ago, MissLemon said:

This is why I buy second hand as much as possible.

Same here. And we make our clothes last. I have many items that are 20 years old, from my hiking fleece to dresses. 

[frogger]

58 minutes ago, SKL said:

Yeah, I was thinking that sweater reminded me of my puppy's teething stage.  😛

I may or may not still be wearing the evidence when I take him out back.  (Sewing the pockets back up is on my to-do list.)

My dog is past the puppy stage and doesn't chew on much except she loves knitted and crocheted things. Destroyed two homemade blankets. One by my grandma who passed years ago and it was still in newish condition because I really take care of the handmade stuff. One by my husbands mom and she doesn't do that stuff anymore so I feel bad for him. So all the knitted/crocheted blankets are stuck in the closet until she passes away I guess. At least she leaves the quilts alone so we have something to sleep with!

[popmom]

9 minutes ago, regentrude said:

Same here. And we make our clothes last. I have many items that are 20 years old, from my hiking fleece to dresses. 

I try to buy secondhand, too. Maybe we need a thread to share our favorite online sources. I just recently discovered ThredUp because they have a store on eBay.

I usually cannot do secondhand shoes though because I have very hard to fit feet. I AM stalking some running shoes for cheap on eBay. I have a few options of interest for over-pronation, and I'm hoping to luck out and find a gently used pair or NWOT.  I'm not a runner though--I walk. 🙂

Edited March 2, 2022 by popmom

[SKL]

I only buy clothes when my existing ones fall apart and can't be worn any more.  But I am wired frumpy.

Love that my kids have stopped growing and I've stopped buying clothes for them.  They get clothes as gifts from others, or they buy their own from gift money, but they don't "need" new clothes.  Yay!

Some - maybe most - of my clothes have seen decades of use, with no end in sight.  I probably have some dating back to when I was my kids' age.  😛

Maybe my kids can sell them as distressed fashion after I pass ....