Military members and military family members, past and present, your opinion on this please...

[Hikin' Mama]

http://revoltdaily.org/stop-thanking-veterans-for-their-service/

 

Someone posted this on my FB timeline as I have been known to thank our veterans and military members. Am I truly wrong in doing so? I give my thanks sincerely; I am truly grateful for the sacrifices they make/have made. I put my money where my mouth is and have participated in some service projects for veterans. Enlighten me.

[Clear Creek]

I am a veteran (and my husband is as well). I always understood that the thanks I received was for the sacrifices listed in the post, since I obviously did not sacrifice my life in service to my country. So no, don't stop saying thanks to your local veterans. They understand what you mean. Even if you don't mean it to the extent that the writer desires or thank them for specific sacrifices, the veteran still takes it that way. I know a lot of veterans (I live in a military community) and I get medical care from a VA facility (which always includes conversations with veterans, they are the friendliest bunch of people, lol) and I would guess that the majority feel this way.

 

Honestly, I think the writer of the blog post feels unappreciated and is asking for kudos. I would also guess that his/her primary love language is words of affirmation, which is not the same for everyone.

[Tangerine]

It makes my husband super uncomfortable.  Sometimes it seems like empty platitudes, sure.  Mostly we understand the spirit in which it is usually given.  I think part of the issue with us is that there is very often an assumption regarding religious and political persuasion that goes along with military service.  We've often been thanked, with a follow up of a diatribe that people assume we must agree with.  We don't.  Then it just gets awkward. 

[Liz CA]

I think the view expressed in the article is exaggerated at best, really nonsense IMHO. Yes, we need to thank them for their sacrifices and their family's sacrifices. They are volunteers in the sense they are not drafted and choose this life style to protect and serve their country.

The part that states something like a "trite statement absolves us of our obligations" is just poppycock. If you feel sincerely appreciative (which you do) then you will likely support other Veteran benefits or nonprofit organizations i.e. Wounded Warrior, etc.

 

I have never met a vet who answered an expression of gratitude with: "Please don't say that."

[Alte Veste Academy]

I found that article to be an odd mix. I generally disagree with the sentiment and think people should feel free to thank veterans however they are moved to do so. My DH is very quiet and modest, and yes it can sometimes feel awkward to him, but it is ALWAYS appreciated.

 

In the end, I thought the article was unfair to civilians and kind of whiny from the POV of a veteran. No way could most civilians understand the enormity and complexity of what they are thanking veterans for, and I think it is unfair to expect them to. I found the "thank a veteran that..." list to be lacking in...pride? Also not everything would apply to an individual veteran, while a general thanks always applies. Some would be downright offensive because they sound more like pity than thanks. No veteran I know wants to be pitied. The writer isn't like most veterans I know, most being stoic, modest, and very private. It is acknowledged that we have a volunteer force, yet for every sad sack point made for why veterans should be thanked, there is a failure to mention positive counterpoints that factor into an individual service member's choice to volunteer and remain in service.

 

Maybe the veteran didn't have children.

 

Maybe the veteran wouldn't have been able to attend college without the GI Bill, and maybe the veteran values the training s/he received in the service to the same degree the thanker values an uninterrupted education. Or maybe the veteran was one of the lucky ones who got a nice fat break while active duty, stationed somewhere only to go to school, paid regular pay and benefits the whole time. It is a pretty sweet deal.

 

Most veterans realize that most civilians have greater stressors in life than "not getting your training ride, workout, spin class, yoga, pilates, or run in for the day." That is just...yuck.

 

Most veterans I know pursue hobbies on their own time, even while deployed, if conditions support them.

 

Most veterans I know consider their military service a "successful professional career" or at least a stepping stone to one.

 

Most veterans I know, as they rise through the ranks, have the security and benefits to allow for their spouse to be a stay at home parent.

 

Most veterans I know chose to live..wherever the military sends them. No, wait, LOL, ALL the veterans I know made that choice. They were/are not powerless. They may not live near, family, the ocean, whatever, but they did make a conscious choice about where they live. The choice was to live wherever they were stationed.

 

Most veterans realize that not all civilians are "able to attend every one of your child’s sporting events, music recitals, spelling bees and parent-teacher conferences." Same for "your spouse or partner comes home predictably every day." And again for "you have your weekends free." I mean, does the writer think all civilians work M-F, 9-5 with the ability to take off for special events at the drop of a hat? My DH is able to take off for kids' appointments and incidentals more easily than most civilian parents I know.

 

Many veterans are pursuing their passion by being in military service, my DH being in this group. His specific (awesome!) job doesn't exist outside of the military, although the basic job and all the skills will easily transfer to the civilian world.

 

"Thank a veteran that you don’t have to be one." Really? I mean, on the face of it, I get the point, but it is lacking in terms of anything positive to say about the experience of service. As a thanks, this one is the worst. "Hey, thanks for doing this horrible, crappy job so that I don't have to do it!" Where is this veteran's pride in service? I'm not feeling any.

 

The bottom line is that every service member's experience is different. I personally think sincere but general thanks is most appropriate. The fewer assumptions made, the better. The fewer specifics, even if applicable, the better, because veterans shouldn't feel required to correct wrong assumptions or expose intensely personal (and many times painful) specifics.

[Pawz4me]

I think that's a very odd article.

 

FWIW, my father was a WW II vet.  Until the day he died he strongly disliked any kind of thanks/recognition for his service.  He had a couple of friends (fellow WW II vets) who felt the same way.  They felt like they did what needed doing and that was all. That's the atmosphere I was raised in, and for better or worse I've never been able to shake it.  So I've always found this culture of almost adoration of (volunteer) current military people and veterans to be very strange and bordering on repugnant.  I saw yesterday that my favorite grocery store now has a dedicated parking spot for veterans, and the first thing that popped in my mind was how derisive my dad and his friends would have been of it.

[Reefgazer]

Most military people I know appreciate being thanked for their service, but there are a few who prefer not to be; those who prefer not to be are in the minority.  Look at it this way:  Most of us would liked to be thanked for a job well-done, so I see no reason to stop thanking veterans.

[BugsMama]

My husband is proud of his service, and a thanks is ALWAYS well received. It may be slightly uncomfortable at times (you know, followed by a bit of a shrug of the shoulders....) and my best guess as to why that is would be that he's proud of what he does, he feels like he's doing the job just as well as the next guy, and doesn't think he's anything special.

 

I agree with Alte Veste that many of the examples in that post come across as pitying, which would feel more offensive than anything else. Especially the thank them that you don't have to be one. Ick. 

 

Do what you do, and don't let people make you feel bad about it. Heck, we (as a military family) still thank veterans for their service. It's a good thing to do.

[blondeviolin]

My husband is a very private person, so getting stopped when we're out to lunch or whatever is uncomfortable for him. But he highly appreciates each person who thanks him. While the military has been a good life with good opportunities for us, he still puts up with a lot of junk that most of his civilian contemporaries don't deal with. He appreciates people recognizing the sacrifice for what it is.

[lovinmyboys]

I guess I don't understand why a simple thanks wouldn't be appreciated. I like to be thanked for all kinds of things-it makes me feel good....even if I'm not sure how to respond or don't think a thanks was necessary. I see people thanking teachers, first responders, etc. Bosses have an appreciation day. October was pastor appreciation month. Why not appreciate soldiers.

 

Dh does get a little uncomfortable when people thank him, but he really appreciates it.

 

That article was really weird. I'm not sure why my dh should be thanked for your ability to be there when your child was born????

[Hikin' Mama]

I think part of the issue with us is that there is very often an assumption regarding religious and political persuasion that goes along with.

I did not know that. I assumed that our military members were as diverse as the country from which they come.

[mom2scouts]

Most of the military members I know appreciate a sincere thanks. .  Most civilians know that military members and their families often live a life that is full of sacrifices that aren't fully understood by civilians and they want to express thanks for that.  I don't think it needs to be spelled out in detail.  Say a sincere thanks and it will usually be well received and taken in the spirit intended.

[Hikin' Mama]

I so appreciate your perspectives! Reading that article kind of bummed me out because I thought, " What has the world come to when a thank you, of all things, sets people on edge?" I will continue to be thankful. :)

 

On a related note, one of my sons dated a girl in high school who joined the Marines right after high school. She was home for Christmas last year doing recruiter's assistance while waiting to be sent overseas. My son was home from college and they went out to lunch. (They no longer date, but remain friends.) As she was in her uniform because she was working, someone at the restaurant anonymously paid for their meal. It touched me so deeply and I'm not even in the military. Maybe because my other son was getting ready to begin his own military career. But I've always been full of gratitude for the sacrifices they make, even before anyone I knew was part of it.

[Clear Creek]

My husband is proud of his service, and a thanks is ALWAYS well received. It may be slightly uncomfortable at times (you know, followed by a bit of a shrug of the shoulders....) and my best guess as to why that is would be that he's proud of what he does, he feels like he's doing the job just as well as the next guy, and doesn't think he's anything special.

 

I agree with Alte Veste that many of the examples in that post come across as pitying, which would feel more offensive than anything else. Especially the thank them that you don't have to be one. Ick. 

 

Do what you do, and don't let people make you feel bad about it. Heck, we (as a military family) still thank veterans for their service. It's a good thing to do.

 

I had to laugh when I read the bolded because it reminded me of the popular t-shirt sold at the PX at the Defense Language Institute...it read "We speak Arabic* so you don't have to." Not exactly the same thing, but yeah, most people serving in the armed forces know that their volunteer service gives others the freedom to choose whether or not they serve.

 

 

*or whatever language was being learned

[BugsMama]

I had to laugh when I read the bolded because it reminded me of the popular t-shirt sold at the PX at the Defense Language Institute...it read "We speak Arabic* so you don't have to." Not exactly the same thing, but yeah, most people serving in the armed forces know that their volunteer service gives others the freedom to choose whether or not they serve.

 

 

*or whatever language was being learned

 

I was thinking more that knowing my husband, his response to something like "thanks for being in the military, because I really don't want to be" would be more of a "Yeah, thank goodness, I wouldn't want someone with that attitude in the military either" - I read it more as a "better you than me" comment than a (more acceptable) "we do it so you don't have to" (which doesn't feel offensive because it's coming from the person serving)

 

I think I just read it different than you :)

[Clear Creek]

It makes my husband super uncomfortable.  Sometimes it seems like empty platitudes, sure.  Mostly we understand the spirit in which it is usually given.  I think part of the issue with us is that there is very often an assumption regarding religious and political persuasion that goes along with military service.  We've often been thanked, with a follow up of a diatribe that people assume we must agree with.  We don't.  Then it just gets awkward. 

 

I wonder if this varies by region? Around here soldiers are usually stereotyped as non-religious and democrats. It always flusters people when they find out my husband (a pastor) served in the Army as an enlisted soldier. It confuses them further to find out that I served as well; the view of women in the military is...well, it is not a positive stereotype. They are amazed that a Christian would willingly enter what they view as a very coarse environment.

 

 

I did not know that. I assumed that our military members were as diverse as the country from which they come.

 

It is just stereotyping. The military really is quite diverse.

[Clear Creek]

I was thinking more that knowing my husband, his response to something like "thanks for being in the military, because I really don't want to be" would be more of a "Yeah, thank goodness, I wouldn't want someone with that attitude in the military either" - I read it more as a "better you than me" comment than a (more acceptable) "we do it so you don't have to" (which doesn't feel offensive because it's coming from the person serving)

 

I think I just read it different than you :)

 

Oh - I didn't think of it that way. No, that attitude wouldn't be well-received, lol.

[SKL]

Keep thanking people in the words that have meaning to you.  It is almost always better than keeping quiet.

 

If we change up how we say it because we have to be politically correct or whatever, then it's going to lose, not gain, meaning.

[nwmama]

It makes my husband super uncomfortable.  Sometimes it seems like empty platitudes, sure.  Mostly we understand the spirit in which it is usually given.  I think part of the issue with us is that there is very often an assumption regarding religious and political persuasion that goes along with military service.  We've often been thanked, with a follow up of a diatribe that people assume we must agree with.  We don't.  Then it just gets awkward. 

 

This doesn't seem much like a real thank you, it seems more like a chance to vent and the thank you is just the intro. I'd find some snappy come back, not rude, but more along the lines of the things Dumbledore said. For instance, when I was pregnant with #3 & #4 I can't tell you how many times people, usually older men, told me with a sly grin "You do know how those things happen don't you?" wink wink. I got so tired of it I started to respond with a completely straight face "Oh yeah, we figured it out...but we really like it so we don't have any plans on giving it up." 

[Paige]

Sincere, polite thanks is always appreciated. I dislike any sort of putting military on a pedestal and hero worship. Every soldier sacrifices something- time with family, his or her own preference in where to live, etc; but those sacrifices don't make every soldier better or more honorable  than every civilian. It gets awkward sometimes when people act sort of like military groupies. Some service members are jerks and that's ok; most service members are just regular people doing their best at their job. 

[Danestress]

To tell you the truth, I don't even know if my DH was thanked by strangers during his 22 years of service. Not in my presence that I recall.

 

But I also think we are ok to thank teacher, police officers, civil rights attorneys, garbage men, social workers, small farmers, hospital workers etc for their work. Like service members, they do get paid, but like service members, they often work very hard in professions they believe are callings to better society. Never hurts to thank people. Oh, I forgot Parents. I think we should all thank parents who are trying to raise good people!

 

I do think the best thanks we can give service members is to honor commitments to their educational, medical, and mental health care, to pay them fairly, and to equip them fully to do what we ask of them. Without that, all the 'support our troops' talk is just talk.

[SemiSweet]

I'm a veteran and dh is active duty.  Neither of us mind being thanked, but I'm kind of awkward, so it makes me feel weird.  I recognize it as a good intention and appreciate it.  The thing is, we both chose it because we wanted it, we enjoy(ed) it.  We both loved our jobs, in fact, I'd still be in if it wasn't for a disability.  We meet so many great people, and some not so great ones, we travel, I can be home with my kids, etc.  It's not always the "most difficult life ever", we have some separations, but it's not like civilians have completely stress-free perfect lives with not a care in the world.  Everyone has something to worry about.  Military people are not better or worse than anyone else.  There are as many reasons to join the military as there are people in the military.  So yeah, the thanks is nice, but a lot of people deserve thanks.

 

The person who wrote the article sounds like they have a deep need to be recognized.  Most people don't.

[maize]

I'm a vet, I've always appreciated the sentiment when people thank me. I see it as a recognition and acknowledgement of the sacrifices that go into military life, and the necessity that someone make those sacrifices, not as an expression of gratitude for specific sacrifices I personally did or did not make (which a stranger could never know).

[Mrs Mungo]

I've only once had someone launch into a political diatribe, and it was about how the person in question didn't think we should be fighting in the middle east. I think most people just want to express gratitude. More recently, people seem surprised that we still have soldiers deployed.

 

I think most military members and their families appreciate a simple thanks of any kind.

 

I will say that I think the article was *trying* to say that thanks should always be personalized. When you send a thank you card for a gift, you are supposed to mention it specifically and why you liked it, something like, "thank you so much for the book! I received it today and can't wait to start reading it. It look hilarious and will help take my mind off of everything that has been going on lately. I appreciate you being such a great friend. Thanks again! Mrs Mungo" I think THAT is more the sentiment that the author was *trying* to get across, but failed a bit in the early part of the article.

 

Certainly other people work hard and there is nothing wrong with thanking them too. But, few people make the kinds of sacrifices that members of the military make. Few people are regularly shot at, maintain a high fitness level, move every 2-3 years (sometimes more often), live far from extended families, give up birthdays and holidays and so forth. My husband was overseas the last time my son was hospitalized for almost 3 weeks. I don't know many small farmers or social workers who wouldn't be available to help their spouse run the household and help with the other kids during the severe illness and hospitalization of one of their kids. My dad had to get on a plane and fly over 3,000 miles so that I had someone to help me. I was at the hospital for 18 hours a day for more than 2 weeks.

 

Not to mention the fact that small farmers and social workers rarely experience any backlash from those who do NOT appreciate the military. I doubt many farmer's wives have been told that their husband is a baby killer (yes, someone has said that to my face in front of my kids). Calling it "disgusting" that soldiers may get some extra thanks once in a while is INSANE to me. I would have to assume that the person in question was extremely uneducated in what many of the members of our military actually face.

 

ETA: I can tell you that members of the military are extremely grateful for those who give service back to them. When my dh is traveling back from overseas and stops into a USO and is received by smiling faces and homemade cookies after traveling nearly 24 hours, sleeping in the floor of a military plane? Believe me, he appreciates that. There are lovely groups of scrapbookers and card makers who send boxes of pre-made cards with birthday greetings or just blank homemade cards, they send them to the Red Cross or USO who distribute them downrange. I love receiving those cards in the mail from dh. I really feel twice blessed-once by the person who made the card and then by dh. It's super sweet. It makes me teary just thinking about them.

[VeteranMom]

My dh and I both served.  It was something I did at a certain point in my life and it allowed me the opportunity to experience a different way of life.  I was given so many opportunities and I think I owe a thank you to my country for allowing me to serve.  It made me a better person and I had some experiences that I would never have had if I had stayed in the civilian world.

It's fine that people appreciate the military members, but it's a bit overdone to see frequent facebook posts and emails about how we need to support the military.  It just feels empty and unnecessary to me.  It's like the pendulum swung- no appreciation for the military in the 60s and 70s and now, too much expressed appreciation.  I never felt I was better than someone who didn't serve and that I deserved to be treated in a special way.   

[Mrs Mungo]

 

It's fine that people appreciate the military members, but it's a bit overdone to see frequent facebook posts and emails about how we need to support the military.  It just feels empty and unnecessary to me.  

 

And I get that. I think that is a little bit what the linked article was *trying* to say.

 

Do you like John Prine? You might like this song (warning: it's anti-war...but, funny):

[Danestress]

I've only once had someone launch into a political diatribe, and it was about how the person in question didn't think we should be fighting in the middle east. I think most people just want to express gratitude. More recently, people seem surprised that we still have soldiers deployed.

 

I think most military members and their families appreciate a simple thanks of any kind.

 

I will say that I think the article was *trying* to say that thanks should always be personalized. When you send a thank you card for a gift, you are supposed to mention it specifically and why you liked it, something like, "thank you so much for the book! I received it today and can't wait to start reading it. It look hilarious and will help take my mind off of everything that has been going on lately. I appreciate you being such a great friend. Thanks again! Mrs Mungo" I think THAT is more the sentiment that the author was *trying* to get across, but failed a bit in the early part of the article.

 

Certainly other people work hard and there is nothing wrong with thanking them too. But, few people make the kinds of sacrifices that members of the military make. Few people are regularly shot at, maintain a high fitness level, move every 2-3 years (sometimes more often), live far from extended families, give up birthdays and holidays and so forth. My husband was overseas the last time my son was hospitalized for almost 3 weeks. I don't know many small farmers or social workers who wouldn't be available to help their spouse run the household and help with the other kids during the severe illness and hospitalization of one of their kids. My dad had to get on a plane and fly over 3,000 miles so that I had someone to help me. I was at the hospital for 18 hours a day for more than 2 weeks.

 

Not to mention the fact that small farmers and social workers rarely experience any backlash from those who do NOT appreciate the military. I doubt many farmer's wives have been told that their husband is a baby killer (yes, someone has said that to my face in front of my kids). Calling it "disgusting" that soldiers may get some extra thanks once in a while is INSANE to me. I would have to assume that the person in question was extremely uneducated in what many of the members of our military actually face.

.

I get that. I didn't mean to minimize the difficulty of military service or to make it sound like some kind of contest. I just wanted to say that thanking people for doing difficult jobs that benefit society is a good thing and not necessarily something to feel awkward about. But I mostly wanted to say that if you really want to thank people who are serving or are veterans, call your elected representatives and put pressure on them to take real action to ensure that our service members and veterans are provided proper care and benefits even if the cost requires civilian financial sacrifice.

[Danestress]

I've only once had someone launch into a political diatribe, and it was about how the person in question didn't think we should be fighting in the middle east. I think most people just want to express gratitude. More recently, people seem surprised that we still have soldiers deployed.

 

I think most military members and their families appreciate a simple thanks of any kind.

 

I will say that I think the article was *trying* to say that thanks should always be personalized. When you send a thank you card for a gift, you are supposed to mention it specifically and why you liked it, something like, "thank you so much for the book! I received it today and can't wait to start reading it. It look hilarious and will help take my mind off of everything that has been going on lately. I appreciate you being such a great friend. Thanks again! Mrs Mungo" I think THAT is more the sentiment that the author was *trying* to get across, but failed a bit in the early part of the article.

 

Certainly other people work hard and there is nothing wrong with thanking them too. But, few people make the kinds of sacrifices that members of the military make. Few people are regularly shot at, maintain a high fitness level, move every 2-3 years (sometimes more often), live far from extended families, give up birthdays and holidays and so forth. My husband was overseas the last time my son was hospitalized for almost 3 weeks. I don't know many small farmers or social workers who wouldn't be available to help their spouse run the household and help with the other kids during the severe illness and hospitalization of one of their kids. My dad had to get on a plane and fly over 3,000 miles so that I had someone to help me. I was at the hospital for 18 hours a day for more than 2 weeks.

 

Not to mention the fact that small farmers and social workers rarely experience any backlash from those who do NOT appreciate the military. I doubt many farmer's wives have been told that their husband is a baby killer (yes, someone has said that to my face in front of my kids). Calling it "disgusting" that soldiers may get some extra thanks once in a while is INSANE to me. I would have to assume that the person in question was extremely uneducated in what many of the members of our military actually face.

.

I get that. I didn't mean to minimize the difficulty of military service or to make it sound like some kind of contest. I just wanted to say that thanking people for doing difficult jobs that benefit society is a good thing and not necessarily something to feel awkward about. But I mostly wanted to say that if you really want to thank people who are serving or are veterans, call your elected representatives and put pressure on them to take real action to ensure that our service members and veterans are provided proper care and benefits even if the cost requires civilian financial sacrifice.

[Ravin]

As a veteran, I think the linked article is so much sour grapes. Bah. I've never heard anyone thank me for my service who I don't think was sincere in the sentiment.

 

The only thing that bugs me is when people assume I must have particular political views because I'm a veteran, and when veterans benefits and rights and needs as veterans are treated as a political football rightfully possessed by only one party.

[Kerileanne99]

I am a veteran. I am in a wheelchair now, and regularly see/chat with other veterans at the VA facility where I receive treatment. I have never heard anyone upset by being thanked, especially when it comes from individuals! Personally, I am always very touched as it always seems to come out of the blue and truly seems a heartfelt sentiment.

 

I do think that sometimes the larger public thank yous come across as forced or overdone, almost as though they have become routine. For examples, airlines adding it into the beginning of their welcome to the aircraft/safety speech feels too automatic and as though people are forced to participate. But these are not so great in number, not does it detract from the honest sentiment of individuals.

And a funny aside, I always think it is really strange in a large public venue when they have all the veterans stand up to be recognized! Because, duh, many like me cannot:). I don't take it personally of course, but it does strike me as a bit uh, absurd? And I really doubt most of the abled-bodied veterans are just thrilled to be standing up so everyone can recognize them...IMVHO, if an en-masse gesture is to be made, unless it is for specific veterans whom are more closely known, maybe something more understated. Applause, or silence maybe?

 

And really, I feel that being overdone in some situations is far better than pretending the issue and returning veterans do not exist. I have never met a veteran who thought they were better than someone who did not serve, or felt they had a right/should be thanked...most are very self-deprecating and do not feel that they are anything special. It is still nice to have someone look you in the eye and tell you thank you.

[Crimson Wife]

The first 5 years of our marriage DH was an Army officer. I know he would get frustrated when people we knew who held anti-military political views would pay lip service to thanking veterans on Veterans' and Memorial Days. The hypocrisy was what bothered him. You're not truly thankful for veterans' service when you're screaming 363 days out of the year about how we need to cut the military budget, yadda, yadda, yadda,

[JuanitaL]

Sincere, polite thanks is always appreciated. I dislike any sort of putting military on a pedestal and hero worship. Every soldier sacrifices something- time with family, his or her own preference in where to live, etc; but those sacrifices don't make every soldier better or more honorable  than every civilian. It gets awkward sometimes when people act sort of like military groupies. Some service members are jerks and that's ok; most service members are just regular people doing their best at their job. 

 

Absolutely.

The sentiment that "they're all heroes!" usually makes me roll my eyes. Some people continue to be a ___ even after they raise their right hand and put on a uniform. DH and I are both vets, he's a retiree.

[merry gardens]

I couldn't open the article so I don't know what it said. 

 

My oldest is in the military. I don't know about him, but I appreciate the appreciation people give to the military. I'm proud of him for his willingness to serve, but when he pledged to serve, he was potentially giving away the life of my first born child.  He has missed some major family events (weddings, funerals, most holidays, etc.) because he was stationed too far away to attend.  This will be the first Thanksgiving he's been home in four years.

[mom2scouts]

My son is in the Army and when he attended a professional sporting event today, his name was on the scoreboard.  There was an American flag image and a sign with the words "Thank you for your service!". He appreciated it even though there was a minor misspelling of our last name.

[lovinmyboys]

It sounds like you had some bad experiences with specific personalities, but being critical of governmental policy involving the military and supporting the troops past and present (and even future) are not mutually exclusive concepts. One does not negate the other.

I agree the two are not mutually exclusive (and thankfully our country seems to have learned that), but being on the receiving end of the military cuts right now is tough...and doesn't always feel like "support." I'm not claiming that I have any idea how the government should spend money or how much is reasonable for a military...what is good policy may not be good for me personally.

 

I do know that at least some soldiers are paying for their own transportation/hotels while doing what they were ordered to do because there is "no money in the budget" for that. I mentioned in the other military thread that my dh's unit is not paying for their travel and another poster said something similar is true for her dh. I have other examples, but I admit that I am a bit bitter right now and am working on getting over it 😊. Lots of people spend their own funds for their jobs occasionally, so there is no reason soldiers wouldn't have to once in awhile. Anyway, I could see how, where I am right now, if people were going on to me about spending too much on the military, I may feel like they didn't support my family (not that it would be true-just how I may feel).