Helping a Teen to Lose Weight

[Jean in Newcastle]

The teen is a boy.  Doctor says he is 30 pounds overweight and needs to lose weight.  He is exercising but because he is starting to have muscle problems like mine  :crying: we're working on that issue with the doctor.  He is a pretty amiable eater but tends to gravitate to sugary sauces (like barbecue sauce) and carbs.  I'm going for lifestyle changes but at the same time I sort of need to know what kind of calorie range we're shooting for with a teenage boy and need some general advice mostly on diet.  

[Liz CA]

I can't really give you a calorie number but I would try to redirect to healthy snacks like carrot sticks with some tasty, perhaps homemade dip made from avocados for instance. He may be craving flavor which is what the sauce gives; perhaps he would enjoy tamari sauce on some more bland dishes like rice instead of other sauces. You can also use tamari on meat.

Try to steer him away from plain sugar to maple syrup and honey in small quantities. Make apples or celery with a little pat of peanut butter. Instead of the usual crackers, try rice crackers, homemade popcorn with spices instead of butter or kale chips.

It is a process but one can retrain oneself.

[Laura Corin]

If sugars seem to be his problem, I would just remove the sugary stuff from the whole family's diet.  Don't focus on him - say that you want to improve the family's health overall.  Check the products you have around and see where sugars come in the ingredients list.

 

L

[Mom in High Heels]

Yes to avoiding HFCS!  That stuff is awful and addictive.  Try to buy everything you can without it.  Eating it every now and then when you're out isn't going to ruin anything, but at home, it's an absolute no-no.  You can get BBQ sauce without it.  So far Webber's is the only one I've found and a regular store, but I know Trader Joe's has some.  In fact, I don't think any of their condiments have HFCS in them.

 

Can he do gentle exercises?  Can he walk in place while watching TV or listening to music?  Get a stability ball for him to sit on while doing school work.  You won't believe how much that works the core.  We're having a similar issue with Indy, but his ped said not to worry about it right now, as he's likely getting ready for another growth spurt (ack!).  I still have him ride our recumbent bike a few times a week, do pushups and other strength exercises though. I think your son is probably about as tall as he's going to get, isn't he?  If not, he too may be in for a growth spurt.  Do you guys have a Wii or an Xbox?  Get some of the active games!  We work up a crazy sweat when we play those, and get a good workout.  You can get them used for less than half the price of new at Game Stop.

[Jean in Newcastle]

He does taekwando twice a week - or at least he wants to.  Pain has been getting in the way of that recently but we've found that daily yoga is helping some with his muscles.  He also loves to ride his bike but allergies have been getting in the way of that.  He starts allergy shots this week.  I'm hoping that I can get him on the stationary bike at the Y and in the pool.  

 

I do avoid HFCS but I'm not sure about the bbq sauce.  I'll have to check the label on that.  Part of the issue is that dh's schedule changed a couple of months ago and he no longer is around to eat meals with us.  So the rest of us have been eating in front of the t.v. and it hasn't always been as healthy as our family meals were.  I mean I put healthy food out but I haven't been watching to see what is actually going on the plate.  

[Laura Corin]

I do avoid HFCS but I'm not sure about the bbq sauce.  I'll have to check the label on that.  Part of the issue is that dh's schedule changed a couple of months ago and he no longer is around to eat meals with us.  So the rest of us have been eating in front of the t.v. and it hasn't always been as healthy as our family meals were.  I mean I put healthy food out but I haven't been watching to see what is actually going on the plate.  

 

Although there is a lot of stress on HFCS in the US (it's not much of an issue here) I think it's important to remember that all sugars provide energy, and if he's having a hard time working off energy, then sugary things in general (corn syrup or no) might be giving him more energy than his body can deal with.

 

L

[Tess in the Burbs]

Honestly, I started gaining weight in 8th grade.  I went away to Outward Bound that summer before high school(by my own choice), and after 3 weeks of backpacking in the NC heat/humidity mountains, I came home several sizes lighter.  Best weight loss that could have happened!  Nothing like being hungry all the time, exercising 20 hours a day, and sweating in the summer humidity.  

 

I seriously had an awesome/amazing time, but I truly lost a lot of weight that summer.  And kept it off until college.....sigh. 

 

 

[Chris in VA]

Agreeing about sugar. I am doing lower carbs and higher fat (higher fat is healthy fats--except bacon...). Don't try to do more fat if you don't lower carbs.

 

I'd have him keep a food diary for a week, as part of a health class. In fact, have everyone do one. Then you can see how he is really eating and tweak from there.

 

(BTW, I have not counted calories at all, just carbs, for the last 3 weeks, and I'm down 7.5 pounds. I'm not hungry excessively, and really feel I'm on to something here.)

[Joyofsixreboot]

I would definitely make this about the whole family being healthy. I wouldn't focus on the weight.  Any activity is good.  Walking, biking, tae kwan do, whatever.  It's a lifestyle.  I agree that sweets and refined carbs have lots of calories and make you want to eat more of them.  Once you remove them plain old fruit begins to taste pretty good.  Again, I wouldn't just make this about him but about good health for all of you.  A teen boy will naturally need more calories so if you remove the really high calorie items he should still be able to eat quite a bit and not be hungry. I would say no less than 2000 calories.  Depending on his activity level perhaps 2500.  At 16 he may still have another couple of inches to grow which will help too.

[Laura Corin]

 At 16 he may still have another couple of inches to grow which will help too.

 

This is so variable, isn't it?  My eldest is probably at full height, and reached it by 16.  Meanwhile, my youngest is likely to still be growing well past sixteen - he's not broken five foot yet.

 

L

[mom31257]

My dd would like to lose some weight. Her problem is sitting too much and hating exercise. Everything she enjoys doing is sitting (reading, writing, video editing, etc.). If a child is 95th percentile height for her age and just a few pounds over the 95th percentile weight, does that mean she really isn't much over the weight that she should be? She's always been around those percentiles, never been skinny, etc. I haven't taken her for a well check up in years because she hates to go to a doctor. She's rarely sick but has gone for a couple of things in the last 2 years. They have never said anything about her weight. 

 

 

 

 

[Garga]

Some ideas of ways to incorporate healthier eating/etc in the day. I left out any exercise advice since that sounds like he has special needs in that area.

 

Eat an extra serving of veggies a day. Replace something else with the veggie. Tiny bit of butter.

 

Replace a meat each week with fish or shrimp.

 

Solid sleep schedule. Go to bed and wake up at the same time 7 days a week/365 a year. Messed up sleep adds weight.

 

Easy on the cheese, mayo, sugar.

 

Slow down and breathe deeply throughout the day. Stress adds to weight gain.

 

Replace one drink a day with a glass of water. (if he drinks milk or soda.)

 

Eat at a table, not snacking on the run or in the car. Eating at a table usually means better food. Snacking or car food isn't as good for you.

 

Spend 1 hour a day that is normally spent in front of a screen doing something on his feet.

[solascriptura]

There is a lot of good advice here. I understand that he has allergies, but you may want to try increasing his exercise. Twice a week isn't enough for an adult to lose weight either. Growing up, I ate a ton of junk everyday. However, I was on my bike for a few hour everyday too.

 

Oh, my YMCA offers exercise classes for kids so maybe yours does too.

[Anne in CA]

For anyone who needs to lose weight water or unsweetened tea only is the best place to start. Milk and juice are not the health drinks most people think they are. Many people lose weight just from that. Building muscle mass is important to resting metabolism, so I am glad that he is working on that. ITA with getting stuff you shouldn't be eating out of the house all together. My oldest has always had a weight problem and we all ate carefully for many years. We measured out everything, drank water and green tea only since green tea doesn't spike blood sugar enough to cause hunger, exercised every day that she was home schooled, and only ate dessert on Sunday night. We also went camping for a couple of weeks every summer to get her hiking and swimming for several hours every day without it seeming like torture. 

[MicheleinMN]

If he likes to watch tv, then I would get him a rebounder/mini-trampoline and get him to just walk on it.  A pedometer might also help motivate him to move more (it does me).  I lost 40 lbs by walking on my rebounder while watching tv and using a pedometer to see how many steps I had each day.  Bouncing on it is great too, but I am not able to do that and was surprised by how much more workout I got walking on the rebounder than just walking in place in the house, and it was easier on my joints too.

 

HTH

[bolt.]

Without being too much in his business, I think I'd make a few healthier shifts for the whole family as far as what I buy and prepare.

 

What you might shift depends on what you are doing now. You just need to "shift from where you are" -- a few steps. You don't need to do something entirely different.

 

Example:

 

Breakfast for us is:

- a starch/grain serving (hopefully high fibre)

- 1 or 2 fruits

- a protein serving

(If the grain is sweetened, the protein isn't / vice-versa, and fruit us rarely sweetened unless there is something wrong with it: only one sweetened item at breakfast)

 

Lunch is:

- a protein serving

- a vegetable serving

- 2 or 3 fruits

- a grain/starch (hopefully high fibre)

- a single small dessert item

- dips, sauces and spreads as-needed to make the heathy items palatable

 

Afternoon snack is:

- a protein (nuts, seeds, soy or dairy)

- a fruit

- optionally: a high fibre grain or starch

 

Supper is:

- a protein (meat, poultry or seafood)

- 3 or 4 veggies (hot, or as a salad, or in a soup)

- optionally: a starch, in small portions

- a fruit or fruit salad before dessert

- a single, small dessert item (i.e. one scoop of ice cream in a saucer, one cookie, one fun-size chocolate bar)

 

After supper snacks include:

- nuts, seeds, dairy and soy proteins (small servings)

- popcorn

- fruit

- individually bagged chips (Halloween size)

- small dessert items

 

We drink water, tea or iced tea (lightly sweetened), "splash" (water lightly flavoured with a 'splash' of fruit juice, lemon and a sprinkle if sugar, spices, etc) and milk with meals.

 

We use sauces, dips, spreads etc. as "helpers" to assist us in eating good foods, but try to avoid using them to "help" us eat snacks and treats. (Carmel sauce is for apples, not ice cream. Cheese sauce is for cauliflower, not nachos.)

 

If you discribe what you tend to eat like currently, we can offer some tweaks -- don't be a radical. This isn't about loosing weight, it's about learning to eat differently, but SUSTAINABLY; baby step by baby step. There are a lot more tweaks that could make my plan above more healthy, but I need to SUSTAIN it until it feels normal, then if I want to, I can tweak it again.

[fairfarmhand]

Instead of bbbq, can you guys start experimenting with other marinades and sauces to find a replacement?

 

I'd also see if  I could find a graphic that explains how carbs affect your metabolism and insulin levels and cause you to crave more carbs.

 

I'd watch the beverages.

 

And, I'd make sure that his breakfasts are heavy on protein, and never include refined carbs. Fruit/steel cuot oatmeal are okay. Pop tarts and donuts are not. If I start my day with a starchy breakfast, I want to eat cookies and bread all day.

[J-rap]

Depending on how drastic a change you (and he) want to make, my own son has had amazing success with the paleo diet.  He was not overweight, but had health issues and overall felt lousy a lot of the time.  He is on a paleo diet that lets you "cheat" one day/week, which makes it tolerable!  haha  He is also gluten free and is careful on the dairy, although dairy doesn't seem to bother him as much.  (On a pure paleo, I think dairy isn't included but my son finds he can handle some cheeses fine.)  If done correctly, paleo is also a weight-loss diet.

 

He actually feels that the paleo diet has changed his life!  He eats all grass-fed meats, mostly organic veggies, organic eggs...  On this diet you don't even worry about calories, and you eat until you are full.  Interestingly, my daughter tried this but the heavy protein was just too much for her.  My son, on the other hand, feels very satisfied with it.  (But at the very least, the diet did teach my daughter to cut out carbs -- in fact, she is pretty much gluten-free now, and she has lost a lot of weight.)

 

This would also fall under the category of an anti-inflammatory diet, so perhaps it would help your son in more than one way. 

 

In order to accommodate my son when he eats over, I have gotten into the habit of eating a lot of paleo-type meals myself -- not so many carbs, etc.  It really isn't as difficult as it sounds. 

 

Also, you can make your own sauces easily, or get ones without sugar and additives at places like Trader Joe's and even Amazon. 

[Jean in Newcastle]

A couple of answers all mashed together into one post:

 

He drinks water only.  The only time he gets a Sprite is if it we are out at a party.

 

His main sedentary culprit is the computer.  We're working on that but he's made the point (unfortunately legitimately) that 90% of his social activity/friends are on the computer.

 

I have been having him go to the Y on non-taekwando days.  He often chooses to go to the teen room to play video games.   :glare: I used to go to the Y with the kids but then my health tanked last year and the pain was too bad to go.  I'm regaining my own strength with PT but I've been dropping the kids off and doing my PT exercises at home.  I need to start going to the Y again.  Dh has said that he will take the kids swimming on some Saturdays.  

 

Starting today I'm going to reinstate family dinner time.  That got dropped when dh started working evening shift.  What this means is that ds will take his food to eat in front of a screen (and the rest of us do too) and that just isn't  healthy.  So I"m going to stop.

 

Breakfast tends to be "get your own" around here.  For ds, that usually means that he makes himself a number of quesadillas.  (I have some eggs and oatmeal).  Ds does not like eggs.

 

Lunch tends to be "get your own" around here.  For ds, that usually means that he makes himself some more quesadillas or has some Chinese food (he likes broccoli chicken which is pretty healthy but he also gravitates to the more sugary stuff like General Tso's chicken) or he eats bbq chicken wings.  (I have a salad with protein.)  I need to work on making lunch together but this is more difficult right at the moment because of my PT appointments and other scheduling stuff.  

 

What I make for dinner is usually stir-fry (no sugar in the sauce) and brown rice (ds doesn't eat the rice with it) or something like salmon, a veggie or two and yams.  But some times on bad pain days for me it becomes "get your own" and ds tends to make himself quesadillas.  And yes, typing this out I see a bad pattern here  :eek: and am a bit  :banghead:  at myself for letting it get like this.  

[Liz CA]

Jean, a lot has been happenig in your family's life in terms of illness and temporary disruptions from any routine. Look forward now and assess the situation which you have done in this previous post. There may be a "small" quesadilla problem :lol: but it can be fixed. Have you talked to him about variety of food? That he should not be eating only one type of food to the exclusion of other (healthier) items? Since he is 16, you can reason with him and give some kind of incentive perhaps. For sustained improvements for x amount of time, he gets to do x - favorite activity or something like this.

 

Have you ruled out that he is eating for comfort? If he is worried about you and your heath or about other issues, this could be a factor as well.

 

[fairfarmhand]

Are those frozen quesadillas?

 

Perhaps he needs to switch to creating his own. Cooking up the chicken, making fresh salsas, grating cheeses, cooking and seasoning the dried beans...would get him off his duff. Also, I find that I eat less when I've put effort into creating something. I think the whole sensory food preparing experience curbs my appetite.

 

He's more than old enough to learn to grill some chicken breasts. He could grill all his lunches one afternoon for the whole week.

 

I think I might quit buying the frozen pre-made entrees and try to teach him how to prepare his favorites from scratch.

 

Sounds like your family has had more than its fair share of upheaval. Don't beat yourself up for the past. It's easy in a crisis to rely on convenience items and get into bad food habits.

[MSNative]

 

This is what we are doing in my "mixed" family (some having to lose weight, some needing to gain.).

 

Have a piece of fruit and a glass of water before breakfast.

Have a salad or veg before lunch and dinner.

No reading or tv while eating.

 

 

I'm considering talking to my kids about trim healthy mom style eating - eating more carbs when you will be doing more strenuous exercise, fewer on more lazy days, etc.

[Garga]

I've also read that having a light soup with a meal causes people to eat less, if you think that's a problem. The soup cannot be cream, but veggie soup or minestrone soup, or example, would be good to have before the main meal.

[gingersmom]

Can you meet with a nutritionist?

 

When I was looking for a therapist for my daughter (too skinny) I came across many support groups for overweight teens.

 

Does he want to lose the weight? Has he tried weight watchers online?

 

You should have the whole family keep track of what they eat everyday, it's eye opening.

[Jean in Newcastle]

He creates his own quesadillas - basically just a tortilla plus some cheese.  He will dip it in salsa.  

 

Chicken breasts are a good idea.  He actually is quite a good cook - esp. of meat!  He makes us carne asada, non-dairy enchilladas (dh is allergic to dairy), lamb gyros and steaks.  I usually provide the veggie / salad sides.  

[Jean in Newcastle]

He's tried Sparkspeople and didn't like it.  (I track my food daily on SP).

 

One of the things we'll discuss with the doctor today is his weight.  I'll be interested in what he has to say (though if he's anything like my doctors he might not know much).  

 

Yes, I've vowed that starting today the screens during meals have to stop.  

[Anne]

How about some weight training?   Many teenage boys think that's pretty cool, and many studies indicate that weight training is even more beneficial for weight loss than cardio (I'm not knocking the other benefits of cardio!).

 

Anne

[Jean in Newcastle]

I had him meet with a personal trainer at the Y and he does have a weight training program set up.  I  haven't been consistent in having him stick with it.  But I need to make that a priority.

[Carrie12345]

I would definitely up the weight training.  It might not shift his body weight as much as just diet and exercise, but if he gets those healthy foods going toward lean muscle (which in turn burns more calories), his body will be healthier despite the scale. And he'll be more fit for the rest of his activities.

 

We are not low/no carb people, but whole grains have made a huge difference in our house. We eat less of them and feel more full. Win/win!

[Laurel-in-CA]

Weight Watchers has really helped my teen dd stay motivated. She is so small and gained almost 30 lbs. after our move several years ago. She's taken 13 of that back off and has taken up jogging and biking as well as swimming to prep for her lifeguard class (just passed, so she'll be working this summer). She has a really upbeat young lady for lecturer and it helps more than I can say. WW now tells her she can have unlimited fruits AND vegetables, with a focus on portion size control for proteins and high fiber carbs. Her usual breakfast is fruit and a cheese stick or two. Lunch is a salad with lunchmeat thrown in; sometimes a sandwich. Dinner is whatever the rest of the family is having...which doesn't usually include carbs because I am diabetic and very seldom prepare them. Her downfall is her love of baking....so she's taken to sharing her cookies with others, which makes her friends as well.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Doctor wasn't concerned with his weight.  He's more concerned about his muscle problems and my history.  He's ordered a full work up.  Once we get a handle on his muscle problems he said to just exercise more and eat more veggies.  

[imagine.more]

Honestly, I started gaining weight in 8th grade.  I went away to Outward Bound that summer before high school(by my own choice), and after 3 weeks of backpacking in the NC heat/humidity mountains, I came home several sizes lighter.  Best weight loss that could have happened!  Nothing like being hungry all the time, exercising 20 hours a day, and sweating in the summer humidity.  

 

I seriously had an awesome/amazing time, but I truly lost a lot of weight that summer.  And kept it off until college.....sigh. 

 

This is actually how I finally lost weight as a teen too. I wasn't quite overweight though I hovered on the edge of it and was certainly out of shape from age 14-17. But then a few things helped. First, I spent two entire summers working as a horseback riding instructor at the YMCA. 50 hours a week lifting hay bales, mucking a dozen stalls, feeding and brushing and caring for a dozen horses, teaching 3 1-hour classes a day in a hot arena, and being unable to just leave to get lunch/snack most days. I not only lost shape but had muscle and energy and just felt good about myself. I think for teens, and anyone really, meaningful hard work is the best way to lose weight and gain strength. Maybe see if there are any summer camps or volunteering opportunities where he could get really active. 

 

And we're currently in a similar situation with my 12 year old adoptive DD. She's in the 97th percentile and well into the overweight category for her age and height :(  Her issue is clear though....she overeats, sneaks food, and doesn't like to be active. We're slowly getting her into activities she enjoys...cheerleading and swimming, and I at least see a change in her energy level for the better so I think it's a good start. 

[weddell]

If you are already doing calorie tracking, then you know how helpful that can be. You may want to see if your son would do it short term just to see how much he is eating compared to how much he actually needs to eat. There are some "total daily energy expenditure" calculators online that should give a ballpark calorie goal. Then from that number is easy to tweak carbs, protein, etc.

 

Since he spends a lot of time at a computer, have you looked into a standing desk? They are pretty cool and people have rigged up inexpensive ones. http://iamnotaprogrammer.com/Ikea-Standing-desk-for-22-dollars.html

People also recommend getting a anti-fatigue mat to stand on while using the desk (costco usually has them for cheap). Some people even put a treadmill set on very very low while using the desk. Basically sitting all day is bad for your health, but it's probably not realistic for many people to give up using a computer so much. These are the solutions to that. Even getting rid of the desk chair and sitting on one of those giant fitness balls instead would probably be good. That way you aren't asking him to give up his social computer time which is sounds like it is an important thing.

 

http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2013/05/20/130520fa_fact_orlean

http://www.cnet.com/news/my-life-with-a-treadmill-desk-e-mail-and-browsing-at-2-mph/

 

[Jean in Newcastle]

I do have a big exercise ball that I've used at my computer before.  I should have him try it.  Thanks!