Rural homeschooling challenges

[MomintheMountains]

This is a follow up to the social interaction question thread. If you are a rural homeschooler, what are your biggest challenges and how do you/have you overcome them? For us, including me, it is the feelings of isolation. It seems like most of the social interaction around here is anchored around the school. We drive 45 minutes to a homeschool coop, which is helpful, but my boys really wish they had other kids to play with on a more informal basis. I grew up in the suburbs and cities, so this is new to me.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

Isolation. Gas cost to go anywhere.

[Kevin'sMom]

After reading through the Regrets/No Regrets threads, plus a few others, I realized that a lot of the problem is simply the feeling of isolation. Add to that a rural area and a tendency to introversion, and we have to worry that the kids are not getting enough socialization (they probably aren't), and/or that we are not providing enough of something/everything. Then there is a kind of fatigue that I have developed just living in a rural area for so long (12 years in Wyoming, 12 years in Missouri).....

 

My suggestion, and I suggested this on the original thread, is that some of us allow our children to make real connections with one another. Kind of a virtual homeschooling group, so to speak. There are plenty of internet channels for this, plus phone conversations, email etc. If anyone is interested in trying this, let me know.

[MomintheMountains]

[quote name="Kevin'sMom" post="5469414" timestamp=

 

My suggestion, and I suggested this on the original thread, is that some of us allow our children to make real connections with one another. Kind of a virtual homeschooling group, so to speak. There are plenty of internet channels for this, plus phone conversations, email etc. If anyone is interested in trying this, let me know.

 

We are interested. I think using the platform that my son's online Socratic discussion uses would be perfect.

[Rosie_0801]

Yeah… Our homeschool groups are all about an hour and a half away. All I can do is thank Fate for making us all introverts, because I'm paying roughly $1.50 for petrol per litre, give or take.

[Guest]

I don't think "regret" is the right word, but my biggest blunder was definitely a bad decision weighing the cost of gas against my extroverted teen's social needs. I often wonder if he would still have chosen to go to ps for high school if I could hop in my time machine and cross out the period close quotation marks in the grammatically correct sentence, "You can't go to Matthew's party because we can't afford the gas." and replace it with the run-on, "You can't go to Matthew's party because we can't afford the gas unless we dip into your college fund but I see how important it is to you and it's not like thirty bucks to get to (name of town) is going to make the difference between whether you go to Stanford or the Police Academy anyway so cheer up, kiddo, I'll pay you back as soon as I find a better job."

[madteaparty]

I don't want to complain because it isn't like it wasn't patently clear to me where we were moving. But moving to a rural area means not only driving a minimum of 40 min. anywhere the kids need to go, but also lack of some things we had gotten used to in NYC, such as access to healthy/quick/ inexpensive ethnic takeout, specialty foods, a cup of coffee for me etc.

It's all good. I can make my own coffee and breathing fresh air and growing roses makes up for it.

[Country Mouse]

For me, it is lack of high speed internet. We have satellite internet and it works ok but it is limited so we have to ration it. Wecan't watch videos and it's really putting a damper on my plans to have ds take online courses for middle and high school.

[LLMom]

Rural wasn't so much a problem for us when dc were little.  It was once they became pre-teen and teens.  Their desire to go places more and be with more friends grew.  We recently moved, and it is still fairly rural but not nearly as much and much closer to civilization. 

[Woodland Mist Academy]

reported post now removed

[Pen]

For me, it is lack of high speed internet. We have satellite internet and it works ok but it is limited so we have to ration it. Wecan't watch videos and it's really putting a damper on my plans to have ds take online courses for middle and high school.

 

This is a growing problem for us too. All we have is dial-up. We were using Duolingo successfully until 2 days ago and then they "upgraded" and  redesigned and fancified their site and now we can't use it. We can get Alcumus problems, but not the videos. Same with Khan Academy. And everything is sloooow...and the more places upgrade and get more fancy, the less we can do. Which is ironic because being in rural areas means needing the long distance sources more than someone in a city who can pop into a store or class. I'm especially upset about Duolingo which was working really well for us--it will be a big loss.

[Pen]

After reading through the Regrets/No Regrets threads, plus a few others, I realized that a lot of the problem is simply the feeling of isolation. Add to that a rural area and a tendency to introversion, and we have to worry that the kids are not getting enough socialization (they probably aren't), and/or that we are not providing enough of something/everything. Then there is a kind of fatigue that I have developed just living in a rural area for so long (12 years in Wyoming, 12 years in Missouri).....

 

My suggestion, and I suggested this on the original thread, is that some of us allow our children to make real connections with one another. Kind of a virtual homeschooling group, so to speak. There are plenty of internet channels for this, plus phone conversations, email etc. If anyone is interested in trying this, let me know.

 

Yes. Interested. My ds has done a little of email pen-pals, and likes that. I think a forum--maybe even one on this site for kids to communicate directly, including about school interests such as science or history, say, sort of like in class discussion time, would be a good thing. 

[Pen]

This is a follow up to the social interaction question thread. If you are a rural homeschooler, what are your biggest challenges and how do you/have you overcome them? For us, including me, it is the feelings of isolation. It seems like most of the social interaction around here is anchored around the school. We drive 45 minutes to a homeschool coop, which is helpful, but my boys really wish they had other kids to play with on a more informal basis. I grew up in the suburbs and cities, so this is new to me.

 

My own isolation is a problem, which I have been trying to figure out how to solve. Ideas would be welcome!

 

We have been lucky that we have another homeschooler my son's age in walking/biking distance, and that they get along extremely well. Other children in the area have come and gone, but this one friendship has made all the difference. We could have been in a city situation and done less well with a nearby compatible friend. The other family keeps talking about moving, so I try to do what I can to help foster the friendship, and, I hope, that will help sway the balance toward them tending to stay. The ability to get together informally, as you say, is a big deal.

 

Watching for children is something we do, because sometimes there are children nearby but not obvious. Like someone living up a long driveway and hidden from sight. (We watch for schoolbus stops in the area.) Or frequent visitors like someone's grandkids.

 

City friends here, though, do not seem to do informal get togethers anymore, only organized "play-dates." So there may be partly a change in the way things are nowadays...rather than all being a place issue.

[swellmomma]

Our biggest challenge is like the OP everything is anchored to the school and as homeschoolers that makes them 100% off limits.  EVen when they were in community league baseball the first year here all announcements were through the school so if there was changes, or a game out of town etc we never knew about it and missed out.

The teens are finally making friends at cadets, we drive 20 minutes each way to go to it, but their friends from there don't live in our town and one lives30 minutes away out on a farm, the rest in the town cadets is in.  SO without major planning they can't just hang out with their friends since rides have to be arranged etc.  ds10 has zero friends, this town is very closed off to outsiders and have endorsed full out bullying towards all my kids.  dd6 only has friends because she goes to work with me at the daycare and now because of sparks, where there are 3 girls total including dd6. 

It is very isolated.  The homeschool support group is for parents only, no kids allowed, so I can't go to the meetings usually because it is on Tuesday nights when my teens are at cadets so I don't have a sitter for the youngers. And the main members including the creator are very much unschoolers and will interrupt anyone talking about any other form of schooling to tell them how they will ruin their child essentially.  There is only 2 of us in the group that are striving for our kids to have a proper alberta diploma and so it gets really uncomfortable to be at meetings even if I managed to get a sitter.

 

That is one aspect I miss from living in the city.  In the city I was a member of several support groups.  They hosted track and field day for the kids, science fairs, field trips, park days, parent meetings, kids gatherings etc.  There was actually so many things being offered/done that we could have been at something new everyday and never got school done at home and still not attended it all.  There was also homeschool sports groups like gymnastics, swimming, etc that allowed us to attend during the day, meet other homeschoolers, and have evenings open for family time.  Out here everything is in the evening in neighboring towns and there is only just this year finally a 2nd homeschooling family in my town.  This was their first year and they are talking about putting the kids back in school next year or hiring a nanny and doing full online school because they work so much (run a photography business), so we don't really cross paths much, since I also work a lot.  For the first 3 school years here we were the only homeschooling family in town and it was seen as a personal snub to others towards the school their kids go to, they went to, their parents went to etc.  They just could not "get" that it was about what was best for my kids, not what was best for theirs kwim.  I also miss the variety of activities we had access to, music lessons, rock climbing, cheerleading, art classes, sewing classes etc  Out here none of that is offered, well music is but it is done at the college for $50 per 30 minute lesson, I can't afford that, it's more expensive than even in the city.  The rest is not available at all unless I want to drive 2 hours each way to access it.

Anyway, yeah the isolation is the biggest challenge.  Even an introvert like me gets lonely at times out here with how isolated we are right in the middle of town.

[Soror]

Cost of gas to get anywhere and the time of course is a big one. Bigger I think is the lack of opportunities in general, even being willing to drive there are very limited things to go to, especially if your child doesn't have mainstream, ie sports, interests.

 

As a mom I find it a bit exhausting to have to be the one always planning and starting things so my kid can have the opportunities and even then I cannot hold a candle to what is available in bigger places. I'm hoping to become a welcoming haven for other kids as they get older but we're not to that point yet, I think that it will actually be a bit easier when we can just have kids come visit without having to entertain parents as well because that is a whole other dynamic to worry about.

 

I find it especially challenging here in the winter as there are so few things to do inside, the skating rink is too expensive, as is bowling- and its smoky. My son is really too old for playplaces at BK and McD but it is the best option, sadly.

 

eta We do have high-speed internet here so we are lucky in that aspect. I am definitely open to my son getting some interaction on-line as well. I know that I use the internet and forums to help fulfill my own social needs as finding like-minded people around here is rare, so I will be keeping that option open.

[PeachyDoodle]

My suggestion, and I suggested this on the original thread, is that some of us allow our children to make real connections with one another. Kind of a virtual homeschooling group, so to speak. There are plenty of internet channels for this, plus phone conversations, email etc. If anyone is interested in trying this, let me know.

 

We might be interested too, if there were some older elementary kids participating (or when dd8 gets a little older). We are not super-isolated, but we definitely don't live in a neighborhood full of kids. We do try to get involved in co-op and other extracurriculars, despite the drive, but it has been harder for dd to form bonds with kids that she only sees once a week. But honestly, she only has one friend I'd consider *close* -- maybe that's typical at her age, or of her personality? I never know when I should worry about these things!

 

Her BFF also moved and now lives 45 minutes away, but we make a point of trying to see her once a month or so.

[Paige]

The distance and increased cost in time and money to do cool activities. This is the biggest one for us.

 

The community being centered around the school so if you reject the school, they feel you are insulting them.

 

Being different is suspicious and it takes more time and effort to form attachments. I see it both ways- People with kids in school are cautious because we homeschool. Homeschoolers are suspicious because we don't use ACE or Abeka.

 

The lower quality of the public libraries.

 

Less diverse population- not necessarily racial or religious, although it is there, but more in conversation and ideas and interests.

 

When it snows- you are stuck because rural road clean up is last on the list.

 

How do I overcome them? I guess I don't. We have reduced what we do and stay home more. We use more internet resources. We have a smaller and less diverse social circle that is slowly growing.

 

I love our neighborhood- it's beautiful here, and the kids have so much room to play outside, so it's not all bad. It's very safe and people really look out for one another.

[RootAnn]

Luckily we aren't sportees (people who have kids who are really into sports) because once you get to a certain age, you can't participate in sports because they are all through the public schools. Sports are HUGE in our little town. School spirit is HUGE and it all revolves around how great our sports teams are. (Even if they aren't.) The local high school football team showed up at the community pool one summer and broke all the rules and harassed the life guards. I packed up my kids & took off because it was setting such a bad example for my little ones. I stopped to speak to the pool manager (who is also a high school teacher) about taking care of the problem. His excuse is that they were just "blowing off some steam" because they'd had "two-a-days" that week. What did I want him to do? He was incredulous when I said if he couldn't handle them himself to call the police. Not our star athletes!

 

We used to have a great little neighborhood of kids, but they've all moved away.  :sad:  It will be increasingly difficult to have the time to get my kids time with their friends, but I am becoming more aware of how important that time is. For now, I've allowed a few sleep overs & I'm seeking a one semester class each year with local homeschoolers my oldest's age. I ponied up & taught it last semester & hosted it at my house. I'm already looking for next year's class (teacher, topic, location). One family drove 30 minutes each way once a week to get their kid here. I'm willing to do that for a semester, even though it is a time suck for all of us. 

[MomintheMountains]

This is a growing problem for us too. All we have is dial-up. We were using Duolingo successfully until 2 days ago and then they "upgraded" and redesigned and fancified their site and now we can't use it. We can get Alcumus problems, but not the videos. Same with Khan Academy. And everything is sloooow...and the more places upgrade and get more fancy, the less we can do. Which is ironic because being in rural areas means needing the long distance sources more than someone in a city who can pop into a store or class. I'm especially upset about Duolingo which was working really well for us--it will be a big loss.

Have you thought about getting satellite internet? It is available just about anywhere. We have satellite internet and it is fast, but with online classes and me working at home, we exceed our data limitations frequently. But it is significantly better than dial up.

 

Reading through this thread has let me know that I am not alone in my feelings and the challenges I have in homeschooling in a rural place. I do hope we can get together an online group for our kids. I will look into the platform that I am thinking about and let you guys know what I find out. A "virtual" homeschool group would be really cool! Maybe us moms need to chat, too.

[La Condessa]

No opportunities for social activities. I'm very introverted myself, but I can see that my very extroverted daughter craves more social interaction, and I don't know how to give it to her. She used to do gymnastics twice a week, but a year ago the coach had a stroke, so that ended. There's a group that meets twice a month for mothers of kids who are younger than school-age, but mostly the kids her age are at preschool and don't come with their moms. We've tried a couple of times driving the 40 min. to go to the homeschool group activities, but once no one else showed up, and once I got terribly lost and we arrived 45 min. late, which I profusely apologized and was then berated for. The only other activity for kids her age around here is soccer, and I just can't commit my family to 3 evenings per week plus Saturdays for one activity for one kid. I love the small town community feel, but I really wish we had more options for things to do around here.

[elegantlion]

We're in a rural town. Thankfully we have high speed Internet because I would have gone insane by now. For ds, there really aren't that many opportunities, they're all tied to the school after about sixth grade. It's a good town to be broke in because you can still do things without the added despair that you're seeing all the things you're missing out on. 

 

Ds and I are both introverts leaning toward hermit status and very happy to hang out. I have to plan trips to the big town carefully because we're on a tight budget. We've decided recently that we're just going to have to drive more to do things and we'll plan our days accordingly. 

 

Ds is happy to do things with me and family, and we've found a few outlets for him in the next town that we will take advantage of once winter stops. We do live near a state park and our town is nice to walk around, so there are things to do, but kicking ourselves out to do them in the key. 

 

This is not my forever home and ds will mostly likely move away to college, so we've framed this as a season of our lives. We feel more content than where we used to live, and we have family close, so that helps. 

[Wildiris]

This is a follow up to the social interaction question thread. If you are a rural homeschooler, what are your biggest challenges and how do you/have you overcome them? For us, including me, it is the feelings of isolation. It seems like most of the social interaction around here is anchored around the school. We drive 45 minutes to a homeschool coop, which is helpful, but my boys really wish they had other kids to play with on a more informal basis. I grew up in the suburbs and cities, so this is new to me.

 

The biggest challenge is doing school and going to town in the same day. I spend a lot of time in the car. It's 1.5 hrs one way to town, so when I go to town we do as much as we can: Swim team 3x a week, piano, singing, Taekwondo 3x a week, etc. This year I managed to fit in swimming for myself.

 

So we cram all the gear and groceries in the back of the car and go for 8-10 hours at a time. This period of time is short in the scope of things, but the benefits to kids are immeasurable. 

 

Social time is time spent doing an activity. Personally, I think social time is a bit overrated. The kids spend time reading or build mad fantasy places in minecraft. We play family games or watch movies. They see other kids at community gatherings or the occasional play-date.

 

For teens this rural living is hard even if they go to "regular" school. Most kids around us don't make it through high school because of the distance. Try getting a teen up at 5am to catch the bus at 5:40am. These kids, including two of mine, wind up in some sort of alternative education setting with low expectations.

[Hunter]

Every place has it's opportunities. Sometimes we can't see them though, because we are so locked into old ways of thinking. Socialization is far bigger than with just same age, sex, interest peers. And the activities that CAN fill our days are far more diverse than we can sometimes imagine.

 

Being denied our old habits can sometimes open new doors for us, that we later look back on with such gratitude.

 

I'm not downplaying your pain. I've just been through transitions so many times now, that I…I don't know, I just take them now as they come. Sometimes I'm too tired to use the opportunities and I take more naps. Sometimes I'm tired of all the adventures my life offers. Other times I get bored and start looking harder at what local opportunities there are.

 

Good luck.

[MomintheMountains]

Every place has it's opportunities. Sometimes we can't see them though, because we are so locked into old ways of thinking. Socialization is far bigger than with just same age, sex, interest peers. And the activities that CAN fill our days are far more diverse than we can sometimes imagine.

 

Being denied our old habits can sometimes open new doors for us, that we later look back on with such gratitude.

 

I'm not downplaying your pain. I've just been through transitions so many times now, that I…I don't know, I just take them now as they come. Sometimes I'm too tired to use the opportunities and I take more naps. Sometimes I'm tired of all the adventures my life offers. Other times I get bored and start looking harder at what local opportunities there are.

 

Good luck.

There is wisdom in what you are saying, but people need community. And for my oldest son, his feelings of isolation led to depression. He had to go to school. He is much happier now. I am trying hard to find opportunities for my younger sons now.

[Woodland Mist Academy]

We made the decision to move. It was a gut-wrenching, life-changing decision. It was also an enormous risk, albeit a calculated one. Moving may not be an option or even a desire for many, but I'll toss it into the ring of possibilities just in case someone is considering it or needs to be given a gentle nudge in that direction. 

 

Sometimes we have no choice but to bloom where we're planted. Other times we need to let the wind carry us to more fertile ground.

[Hunter]

When I developed my seizure disorder, I high tailed it to a major city with good public transportation. It meant leaving my marriage and going homeless, but...there was no other choice. Sometimes moving not only improves the quality of your life, but saves it. But moves are not without risk, and loss, and cons to match the pros.

[happypamama]

Isolation. Gas cost to go anywhere.

Yes, this. And the time involved. It's not worth it for me to drive 45 minutes each way for an hour activity. Sometimes we'll do it for a two-hour activity, but we'll dovetail that with grocery shopping and other errands -- makes for a long day, but it beats going out multiple times.

 

I love living in the country (15 minutes from the nearest grocery store), but it does have its drawbacks in that you really do have to plan things well. Otoh, we only choose to do that which is really, really important to us.

 

ETA: Without high speed internet, I'd go crazy! We have DSL, and it's quite fast, certainly fast enough to do streaming videos easily. We don't watch much TV (and don't have cable) and don't use our phones that all often, but we use our internet heavily!

[Momofeat]

I don't think "regret" is the right word, but my biggest blunder was definitely a bad decision weighing the cost of gas against my extroverted teen's social needs. I often wonder if he would still have chosen to go to ps for high school if I could hop in my time machine and cross out the period close quotation marks in the grammatically correct sentence, "You can't go to Matthew's party because we can't afford the gas." and replace it with the run-on, "You can't go to Matthew's party because we can't afford the gas unless we dip into your college fund but I see how important it is to you and it's not like thirty bucks to get to (name of town) is going to make the difference between whether you go to Stanford or the Police Academy anyway so cheer up, kiddo, I'll pay you back as soon as I find a better job."

 

This brought tears to my eyes. My dd(14) is a freshman, and we've chosen the route of going, going, going in spite of the gas, and I teach classes to help pay for the extras. It's 45 minutes-1 hour for everything we do, including church, co-op, dance, etc. When we leave home, we're gone all day long because we have to combine everything in the days that we're out. It has been SO HARD sometimes, but we believe we have made the right decision. Thank you for this encouragement.

[claluck]

We are fairly rural as well.  I always heard talks on here of co-ops and such and they sound so fun.  (you know grass is always greener) I am pretty sure the nearest co-op is about 3.5 hours away.  I am not sure I would be super super involved but I would love that connection.  I know two other hs families.  One I am wonderful friends with and while we don't homeschool the same way we get along great.  MY kids enjoy her kids but my oldest still gets left out he is about 3 years older than her oldest.  The other family is a bit different from me.  WE cannot seem to connect and her kids ages are much different than mine.  Most of them being much older.

 

Extracurriculars are sorta out.  Most things in the community are through the schools.  Those that aren't are way above our price range. Mostly our fault because we have so many kids(7 with one on the way). My kids are involved in church youth groups and scouts which they enjoy.  

 

I could say socialization is lacking but honestly one of the reasons we pulled our kids way because our oldest was being bullied horribly.  So being isolated and slightly lonely is still more emotionally healthy for him than being in ps was.  I am sure he would be interested in an online buddy of some sort but havent looked into it too much.  I am a bit leary about giving him that sort of freedom you know with there being creepies out there and all.  I would have to really check things out first and honestly it isn't high on my priority list.

 

They do play together quite well and like mentioned above.  Socialization isn't about just with others.  Mine are learning to socialize with people of all ages. 

 

Winter is also difficult here.  Winter lasts 9 months here I swear and the roads can be quite treacherous requiring 4wheel drive to get anywhere.  Luckily we have a four wheel drive vehicle but still its safer at home than out there often.  Plus due to a recent car loss we have been sharing one car as a family since last fall.  Meaning we really are stuck at home most days.

 

Every few months we travel to the big city (about 4 hours away) and before we go we always look into educational extras we can do there.  There are so many free and cool concerts and art shows and plays I think often how cool it would be to live closer.  Honestly though even if we did I doubt we would go more often.    

 

That said and whining aside.  I LOVE LIVING RURAL... I love the summers when we can spend many many hours outside exploring the world.  I love that my community has a less "competing with the Jone's" mentality.  And I love that they have to learn how to live without and the idea of delayed gratification.  There is no just running to walmart for whatever you need here... nearest one is 3 hours away.

[Momofeat]

Isolation & cost of gas is the greatest issue here, too. We drive 45 minutes to an hour in one direction at least 4 days a week. Fortunately, there is an active homeschooling community in that direction. I suck it up & plan to stay out all day long. We joined a church in that direction, and my kids have awesome friends over there. Unfortunately, we do not know folks right around us very well at all, but the effort & expense has been worth it.

[Woodland Mist Academy]

This is a growing problem for us too. All we have is dial-up. We were using Duolingo successfully until 2 days ago and then they "upgraded" and  redesigned and fancified their site and now we can't use it. We can get Alcumus problems, but not the videos. Same with Khan Academy. And everything is sloooow...and the more places upgrade and get more fancy, the less we can do. Which is ironic because being in rural areas means needing the long distance sources more than someone in a city who can pop into a store or class. I'm especially upset about Duolingo which was working really well for us--it will be a big loss.

 

:sad:

 

I wanted to like your post, but it seemed wrong to like it. :grouphug:

 

[PeacefulChaos]

We are in a rural town as well.  Most things about it don't bother me personally (I don't care if the closest mall is 45 minutes away and I've never understood all the Target hype :lol: ) but I think opportunities for the kids are better in the cities.  There is a homeschool band about an hour away that I really, really would like to sign Link up for in another year or so - but that's going to mean driving an hour each way at least once a week. 

Also, just 'stuff to do'.  Museums and such.  Here we have stuff to do, too, it's just different stuff lol.  We don't have much available in the way of anything extracurricular - sports, music, anything really.  So I definitely notice that and sometimes wonder if I would like it better if we moved somewhere that had more to offer in those arenas, especially as the kids are getting older and into their middle and high school years.

Our town is not very walkable.  Yeah, we have trails but they are trails lol... the public library (which isn't great to begin with) is maybe 1/2 mile from my house but there is no sidewalk to get there, on one of the two very busy 4 lane roads running through town.  I would like more walkability - thats something I loved about NYC (when I visited - never lived there).

 

I've liked being rural while they are young, though, too.  I like the freedom of sending them out in the summer (usually in their swimsuits) and not seeing them back inside until dark, other than the inevitable popsicle run ;).  The whole ideal of them being able to find spare wood around and try to build themselves a treehouse - that sort of thing.  Then again, those things wouldn't be impossible elsewhere, either....

[ocelotmom]

Yup, isolation.

 

We're not that far from the nearest town, but it's been very difficult to get a group organized, let alone one with people who think at least a little like us (not-religious, relaxed-but-not-unschooling). 

[msjones]

Sigh...

I'm a city girl invading your thread.  Hope that's okay.  I have a huge and unattainable dream of living a rural life.  

 

I'll just pipe up and say that we have every 'resource' we could possible want very nearby.  We have museums, a symphony, multiple large-scale theaters that put up international shows, music lessons, every sport imaginable from skiing to soccer to fencing, many co-ops, public school/homeschool hybrid programs, major sports teams, shopping galore, excellent library systems, high-speed internet, outstanding organic groceries, churches, skateboard parks, 4-H, enormous farmer's markets, a ballet company, major universities, skating rinks, parks, science centers, children's theaters, zoos, endless birthday party invitations, aquariums, ALL of it.  

 

It's lovely.  Sort of... 

On the other hand, it's just too much.

 

I have to actively seek out peace and quiet for my kids.  And most people think I am weird, weird for wanting peace and quiet. Most of their friends are BOOKED.  Kids don't have time to just hang out in the neighborhood.  Kids around here don't know how a starry night sky looks, how real quiet sounds, the feeling of space and time.  They are BUSY.  

 

I know we have it good in many ways.  I am thankful for the many urban opportunities my kids have enjoyed.  I am very happy living here.  But, I know we're missing out too.  

 

I don't mean to dismiss the challenges of living rurally.  It's actually good for me to read about some of that reality. 

[claluck]

msjones, I totally get you.  Even in our small town we have friends who schedule every moment of their lives away I swear with sports and dance lessons and such.  I agree I believe it is wonderful to just let kids play.  One of the huge advantages of homeschooling my younger ones.  My now first graders used to spend 7:50 am to 3:30 pm every day all day in school with 2.... 20 minute recesses.  Then home and any extra activities and homework, dinner and family time and suddenly it was bedtime.  Now with homeschool they have soared academically.  Gone from reading right at beginning 1st grade level to beginning 3rd grade level just in the first half a year.  Math has also sped by and we just started 2nd grade math this year.  And they get a nice long 45ish minute break in the am and are usually done by lunch.  And there is zero homework.  They spend the rest of their time riding their bikes, building snow forts, playing soccer.  I feel like I gave them their childhood back by choosing to homeschool them.   

 

I dont think I would trade my rural living for anything.  When my DH almost got another job a couple years ago we were looking at housing in the area and had already decided to try and get a few acres about 30 miles out of town.  To me I would love to live about an hour outside of a bigger city.  Maybe a bit more.  But living 4 hours from one creates a much bigger challenge for us.  Our trips to town are exhausting marathons of dr visits, shopping, family visits, and attempts to have a bit of fun in there too.

 

 Of all my rural challenges though I think my biggest one is medical care.  Thankfully everyone in my family is healthy but I cringe at the thought that I would need to drive at least 2 hours to get to a hospital if one of my kids say broke their arm or something.  We do have a small local hospital but they are HORRIBLE and I would only use them in a literally life or death emergency.  For example my DH got 3rd degree burns from mid thigh to mid calf on both legs.  The dr told us to just let them air out (his exact words were something to the effect of wearing shorts and letting them get lots of air).  um yeah.  We went straight home and called the burn unit 4 hours away.  They had much different advice.  

 

With the medical care issue if any of my children had special needs or disabilities we would really struggle.  DH an I already decided long ago that if we had a child with a disability  we would probably move.  It would be a big deal for our family but the resources available to special needs kids in cities vs rural is NIGHT and DAY.  

[bttrflyvld]

We don't have a library.  Which is the best resource you can have for homeschooling.  The nearest one is 25 minute drive away, which isn't that bad.  But we have to pay to use it and it has no selection.  I am so excited that we are moving in 3 months to where we will have the best library.  I've been scanning their catalog for books I want to use next school year and they have had everything I want to use.  So I won't have to buy them this year. 

 

The other problem I have is I don't really know any other homeschoolers that are near to me.  Everyone is quite a drive away.  That is hard.  but the move is going to solve that.  I hope.