Budget for extracurriculars (for the kids)

[SKL]

So I know people don't like talking about money matters here, but I am curious about how people budget for extracurriculars. 

 

Let's assume that all basic needs are met and there is enough in savings that nobody is going to starve.  And you don't have any expensive hobbies yourself.  You have some money that you could either spend now or save for something beyond meeting basic needs.  How do you decide how much to spend on extracurriculars?

 

The cost of extracurriculars that my kids are in span a pretty broad range.  From swim lessons at $12/hr, to riding lessons at $55/hr (unless I can get a volume discount).  Little Gym and TKD are a package deal; once I pay $2,000+ for the school year, we can attend unlimited classes (and TKD includes me too).

 

Then there is the rec center membership and the museum memberships....

 

If I sit and add this all up (which I have not done!), it's a scary thought.  But up to now, I have always felt that these were important expenditures.  Swimming and self-defense are life skills, right?  And having some exercise every day is important for our health and happiness.  Piano is supposed to make the brain think better.  And what could be bad about museums?  As for horse riding, well . . . that might be indulgence, pure and simple.  ;)

 

So what are some different ways of thinking about this?  It's worth it for a season?  It's irresponsible and ridiculous?  All things do in moderation???

[Mrs Mungo]

For the year? Per month? What all are you including?

 

Some things we pay for up front (most of the scout fees, theater, most of the debate fees, etc) and other things we pay for by the month (music lessons, language tutor, etc). I don't figure things like museum memberships into my school budget because we would probably do that regardless.

[AK_Mom4]

for us:

Swimming is a Life Skill.  I'm a terrible swimmer myself, so paying for lessons was a no brainer.  Now that they all swim, we are done with that expense.

Skiing is our winter sport.  It is so dark here in the winter that I feel like we HAVE to have some sort of winter activity.  Group x-country lessons are cheap and make us get out at least 3 days a week.

 

Music lessons (piano and saxophone) - ah, those are DD12's great loves, so that's our luxury indulgence.  This would be the first area to go if we had to cut back.  Fortunately, she's the youngest so as the others move on to college life and paying their own way, she gets the benefit of the parents' disposable income. :w00t:

[T'smom]

If you are comfortable financially, do what makes you and the kids happy. If you really feel something needs to change and you should spend less, ask the kids what they would like to keep or cut. Prioritize the things that you feel add value to your lives.

[ondreeuh]

I am super frugal. It doesn't matter if we have many thousand in our savings account; I cannot bear to spend money unless I am really sure it is worth it. Once I am sure it's worth it, then I spend without guilt. :)

 

I've seen you post about your schedule several times, and there is no way I could keep up with that. I need "down time" and my kids do too. And getting my kindergartener in bed by 8 is a priority for me. So he does soccer one afternoon a week, and will start swimming lessons 2x week once they resume in November. I think that is plenty! He has recess every day and gym 2x week at school, and we often play outside at home where he runs around.

 

The soccer comes to about $10 a week and swimming is $15 a week. We may try ice hockey and karate, but those would replace one or both of his other activities. Time and interest are really the limiting factors for me, not money. But I still wouldn't pay for an expensive class or hobby if I didn't think his enjoyment & skill development justified the cost.

[SKL]

For the year? Per month? What all are you including?

 

I'm thinking for the year, or maybe just the school year.  Since we don't do any competitive stuff at this point, it's just mainly the fees/tuition.  They don't need "gear" except for the set that was included in the TKD deal.  Oh, and some ballet and tap shoes (not very expensive).  I did buy some riding boots and will buy riding helmets at some point.

 

[bettyandbob]

Fees for some things are cheap or free (4H, church choir, scouts). For those things we look at time and whether we value the activity

 

My kids were required to be in swim lessons (winter) and recreational swim team (summer) until they were 12--then they were permitted to drop swim team if they wanted. Swimming is a life skill and passing Red Cross level 3 is not good enough for me to feel a person has a decent feel for water and is able to have a good response to a water emergency. So, money spent on swimming was my first priority. Some years we had very inexpensive sources for lessons. 

 

My kids were all in one sport per season (fall, winter spring) beyond swimming lessons. This started as a requirement for oldest because he had serious motor skill problems and keeping his body learning sports skills as well as building muscle was a way to help him. We had a year where he swam twice a week, did gymnastics twice a week and played soccer twice a week (fall and spring). OT evals noted huge improvements in strength and some in coord. We did taper back to the orig one sport/season. 

 

Dd seemed wanted to try everything. Since ds was doing a lot and we had funds, I tried to get her in things too. 

 

Beyond swimming and one other sport a season other activities would be evaluated on cost, time and whether it meets a skill/need. Expensive activities that we did over time were music and art lessons. I think music and art are valuable things to understand and appreciate even if you are not talented in those areas. I always looked at whether we could get an activity at a discount (gymnastics was discounted for homeshoolers, the Y had a discounted PE program, I've gotten discounts other ways). If an activity is going to be hard on commuting time we don't consider trying it. Over the years my dd specialized and she is down to one thing that she does 6 days a week (ballet). She found the "thing" she liked and I'm happy to support that. When kids start to specialize you want to be careful about pursuing something with a coach/studio/team that is going to match what you can handle as a family, while still going with a good program. I'm lucky I found that 2 miles from home. We never tried riding lessons with dd because I knew there was no way we were going to get very far with it. I am now trying therapeutic riding with my youngest, but the choice to do that activity has a completely different purpose than "let's try and see if this is fun", which is what it would have been with dd. I only do "let's see if this is fun" if the activity is close by and relatively inexpensive (like a park authority class). 

 

[SKL]

Good point about the therapeutic value of lessons.  Both of my girls have physical needs for gross motor activities.  One of them has therapists who highly recommend gymnastics in particular.  I can also see horse riding being therapeutic on multiple levels.  (Talk me into it ;).)

 

The other thing is that for my eldest, if she doesn't do physical stuff she won't excel in anything.  So to me, that impacts the value of the activities.

[mathmarm]

Memberships/Seasons ticket: Limit yourself to 4 and then schedule yourself to attend often enough that you feel it is worth it. That you're getting your moneys worth and the kids are enjoying/thriving at that level of exposure/repetition then do it. We have seasons ticket to the local theater, a sporting event and 2 different musuems. Hubby attends a lot of sporting events both in the community and at the school where I teach.

 

Lessons: If it is an important enough area and you can afford it. Then spend. Hubby and I are older and have our first son Jr. who was born earlier this month, but we've saved for his education and extracurricular for years. He'll begin swim lessons when he is 3mos. and we hope to keep him in swimming until he is at least 12yo.

I believe that physical movement, gross motor development and skill is extremely important especially in the early years, so I have no qualms with putting my kid in an indoor gym group, swimming and tumbling the moment he reaches the required age.

 

For me, the lessons are a priority. I want Jr to grow and develop and have his physical out lets. When he is of school age, then maybe things will change,but for now getting him out of the house and involved in activities is a priority for Hubbby and I. Jr. is an only child and probably always will be, Hubby and I are older, we don't have the energy/stamina/youth needed to engage him fully for every age and stage, but I want him to get that exercise. So, yeah, I'm putting my infant in swim lessons as soon as he is 3mos old. (Actually, he'll be 14 weeks, since the start date for the session is a little later.)

[kiwik]

my budget is $10 a week. This means as6 can do gym ($80 for 8 lessons) over a term and a free or very cheap thing through school each term. It doesn't stretch to swimming lessons which are just too expensive and often not very good quality but they do swimming at school and we are not a water oriented family. If I had more money we might do different stuff but it would still be limited to twice a week and finished by 5.30 as bedtime here is seven and will not be later for some time.

 

Eta. The only time we did swimming it was $110 paid up front for 10 20min lessons in a class of 10.

[maize]

Good point about the therapeutic value of lessons. Both of my girls have physical needs for gross motor activities. One of them has therapists who highly recommend gymnastics in particular. I can also see horse riding being therapeutic on multiple levels. (Talk me into it ;).)

 

The other thing is that for my eldest, if she doesn't do physical stuff she won't excel in anything. So to me, that impacts the value of the activities.

I tend to view activities as meeting specific needs and providing specific benefits, evaluated according to the needs and potential I perceive in my children. They are at least as important in my mind as the academic portion of our homeschool.

[Danestress]

I can't even talk about the budget. Let's just call it 'a lot.'

 

I am a believer in good training. We have spent a lot of money on music lessons, tennis lessons, swim lessons etc. In my experience, these are the types of skills best mastered in childhood. I am sure there are exceptions, but most people who are truly proficient started in childhood. I want my kids to have those opportunities!

 

I would not accumulate debt in order to train a violinist or tennis player. But within our budget, allowing out kids to work toward dreams has been a priority.

[Kari C in SC]

Our 15 year old dd does prep op gymnastics. We get a homeschool discount and it comes to $91 a month if I pay in advance, which I do. With that comes competition fees. That is probably another $1000 when you include gas and meals for traveling. She loves it. She is not the best gymnast, but what it does for her mental as well as physical health supersedes any negative. She had and is still having a very long struggle since her big brother died. Gymnastics is her outlet. Worth every dime.

 

We just in the last month enrolled our 9 year old boy in karate. He has never done any organized activity. He is thriving with this. We are supposed to go twice a week, but can go to all 5 classes if we want. We did 4 last week and he did so well. It is $89 a month. Before my son passed away and left us with an inheritance, these classes would have never fit our budget. It has been a hard adjustment for me excepting that we can make these choices. I choose to look at the gift of them and see what good is being done in my kids' lives. I say if you can comfortably afford it, do what your kids learn from and enjoy. You won't regret it.

[Dory]

My kids activities come before any expensive hobby I might choose right now. Swimming is a life skill. Drowning is too common. Piano has been very therapeutic for my CAPD ds. I also think that it gives them a skill with which to decompress on a stressful day as an adult. Music appreciation is a life saver for me. There is more than just the academic that needs to be developed on a child. Sports are an easy, fun way for them to learn numerous social type skills and develop coordination and muscle tone. My dd is taking riding lessons right now, they are all in gymnastics and piano, and they will all be in choir after christmas. Swimming lessons happen every summer, and I take them to the pool or river as often as I can. They all play soccer every spring, although I told my dd she could stop next year as she hates it. Next year she might start 4-H.

[Dmmetler]

I spend about $250 a month on things that most would consider extracurriculars for DD. Having said that, I think they all really help her. Tumbling classes have honestly done more for her than OT did-and are a lot cheaper. Cheer has really given her a workout on the sensory and social skills end, and she's improving by leaps and bounds there as well. Piano is a major emotional outlet, and her teacher is wonderful with her on that end.

 

All told, I think it's cheap at the price. If we couldn't afford it, I'd have to make cuts or find alternatives, but since we can, it's worth the time and money.

[blondeviolin]

My kids are allowed to pick one extra-curricular because that's all our budget and time allows for. All in all, for three kids, we pay just over $110 month. Emmett's swim is the most affordable at $40 a month for 4 hrs a week and meets. The girls do gymnastics at $36 a month (each) for one 50 minute class.

[sunnyday]

Our family is fortunate to be very well off, and we could technically "afford" almost anything. But we have a lot of limitations. We have other priorities for our money and a strong drive to save for retirement/college/rainy day. I believe that overscheduling is very detrimental, and with my son in public school, he can get overscheduled in a heartbeat since he otherwise has very little downtime. And then there is peer pressure -- I don't want to spend excessively more than my friends with fewer means. Oh yeah, and I hate driving!

 

At only four I don't feel my daughter needs much outside activity. She does U5 soccer ($20/season) because her brother is there anyway. She does summer swim lessons ($40/2 weeks, we did two sessions this summer). That's it. We'll start dance or gymnastics after she's five, currently deciding between the non-competitive studio ($45/month) or the more-competitive studio ($55/month plus registration fees and recital costs). She also wants to do karate eventually, but I won't start her until she's six so we have some time to decide if dance is a good enough fit for her to stick with it in lieu of karate, or do both, or replace dance with karate.

 

My son at six begged for a long time before we started him in karate this summer ($55/month). After this season of soccer is over ($50/season) we might bump him up to twice weekly karate ($100/month) because he really wants the practice. He turns 7 in a few weeks and we'll start considering music lessons at that point -- he wants to play drums.  :huh:

 

If we homeschooled I might bump it up by as much as one activity per kid. Maybe.

 

Oh, and I meant to mention...several people have said that extracurriculars can be justified because physical activity is important. I can't help stating the obvious...running around outside or going to a public park, is...free.

[KungFuPanda]

We don't budget for vacations. A week or two in the summer isn't worth us forgoing what we want to do regularly in our real lives. We all have different activities (parents included). Budget-wise this means we may go years between vacations, but we all do what we want from day-to-day. Keep in mind that I've never had a kid beg for riding lessons or hockey. I can't see getting into the mega-expensive hobbies without a very compelling reason beyond passing curiosity.

 

I'm sure our solution wouldn't be acceptable to many families, but we happen to live in a place where we have a LOT to do without leaving town.

[SKL]

Oh, and I meant to mention...several people have said that extracurriculars can be justified because physical activity is important. I can't help stating the obvious...running around outside or going to a public park, is...free.

 

That is true depending on the location and time of year.  For those of us who live near the Canadian border and work full-time, it's dark, cold, and often wet by the time we have the leisure to play in the evenings for most of the school year.

 

[bettyandbob]

 

Oh, and I meant to mention...several people have said that extracurriculars can be justified because physical activity is important. I can't help stating the obvious...running around outside or going to a public park, is...free.

 

 

For a kid who has motor issues running and playing outside does not come naturally. Even when forced the child may not get as much exercise as he needs. As one poster said paying for gymnastics is cheaper than OT. 

 

If you have only had children without physical deficits, it may be hard to imagine. Many dc naturally do run and climb a lot etc when outside. For those who don't because they can't or they've given up because it's just hard to enjoy that kind of play, then enrolling in organized activities is a replacement. 

[SKL]

For a kid who has motor issues running and playing outside does not come naturally. Even when forced the child may not get as much exercise as he needs. As one poster said paying for gymnastics is cheaper than OT. 

 

If you have only had children without physical deficits, it may be hard to imagine. Many dc naturally do run and climb a lot etc when outside. For those who don't because they can't or they've given up because it's just hard to enjoy that kind of play, then enrolling in organized activities is a replacement. 

 

This is true too.  I used to try to get my kids to move by using yoga or dance videos or having us all go outside.  One of my kids would just sit on the sidelines watching the rest of us move.  The classes I put her in have coaches who are experienced in motivating sedentary kids.  The social aspect of it is also motivating.  And also, she found that she likes certain things like swimming and some aspects of gymnastics, so she is motivated to put forth more effort.

 

[chiguirre]

A lot of kids' extracurriculars are free or very low cost. G&T do a church choir that's both quite good and free. T's tennis team is free (due to a super generous hs mom who coaches the team and offers group lessons for free at a public court that we get for free). All we pay is the USTA membership fee and a team fee to cover the coach's registration costs. Scouting is very low cost for us (less than $100/year per kid, not including a week long residential summer camp) plus the kids do earn money for their scout accounts by putting up flags on national holidays (G) and selling cookies (T). Even TKD is only $50/month/kid at the Y for 3 classes a week. We do pay for a hs orchestra and choir, but these are a very good value for the amount of class time and level of instruction the kids receive. If you look around, there are lots of opportunities for low cost/no cost extracurriculars. There aren't any that don't take parent involvement/driving/volunteering though, so there is that limit on what you can do.

[Jennifer in MI]

I don't want to add it all up.  But, we can afford it, so we do it.

 

Gymnastics - VERY expensive.  It's $300/month right now.  That doesn't include her competition leo ($225) or warm ups or practice leos.  It doesn't include travel expenses.  But dd is good and loves it.  So, she does it.

 

Rowing.  I don't even know.  I just write checks and turn them in when asked.  In addition to those checks, there is travel expenses.  Those are what are so high.  I'm pretty sure we spent about $7000 last year, maybe more.  My boys love it, and two of them placed at Nationals this year.  One of them won a race at an International regatta.  So, they're good. We're hoping for college scholarships!!!

 

That is really all my kids have time for.  Dd wants to try a dance class.  Ds13 will go back to some karate as soon as rowing winds down a little this fall.

[PeacefulChaos]

I'll tell you this - I definitely wish I could spend more.  :D

 

Right now, we do one session of swimming lessons for each kid in the summer.  I'd LOVE to do more than one session, because they aren't advancing all that well - we have no access to a pool most of the time, so their swimming skills aren't practiced often enough for them to really get good.  I wouldn't go so far as to say it BOTHERS me, per se - more that I just really wish they could do more.  :(

Other seasons, the boys each pick a sport for spring and fall (this year it's been soccer for Astro and baseball for Link, which was a new experience for us!) and Pink will do the same.  This year she's doing dance because she (and we) know she likes it (she did it for a semester last year, which usually doesn't include participation in the recital - however, there were only 2-3 of them that signed up, so they got to join the regular class and be in the recital!  I was glad to get to see the whole thing through and see if she liked it, including the being on stage part.  ;) ).  I don't know how long she'll do dance - they do a lot of dance moves in the older groups here that DH isn't a fan of, so unless we move or a different studio opens up, we'll probably have to take her out at some point (unless they keep just a regular ballet or tap class - he has no problems with those.  A lot of the older girls do more hip hop and free style type stuff).  On those other seasons, the boys' sports cost $55 each, and Pink's dance is around $130-140 per semester, IIRC. 

We don't have memberships to... anything.  :p  Granted we don't have anything around here to have memberships to, so... :lol:

 

Oh, and lessons - we don't do any music lessons here yet, unfortunately.  :(  We may have the $$ to be able to start Link in piano, at least (though he wants to do violin, but that would require actually finding a violin, etc), but DH is adamantly opposed to outsourcing piano for any of the kids because of the cost factor, since *technically* I *could* teach them myself.  But I hated doing it when I tried, and it just didn't go well and we quit.  I have NO desire whatsoever to teach piano to any of the kids.  But I DO want them to learn an instrument, music, etc - right now we have NOTHING to give them that around here.  Being a musician, it's really, really hard for me to not have them learning already (with the exception of Pink).  More than anything else, I really wish we could do lessons or something for them...

[edelweiss]

We spend a lot.  A whole lot.  However, we can afford it without hardship, so we do it.

 

I don't have a total, but DD10's dance tuition is around $300/mo.  DD13's dance tuition is only $198 a quarter.  Of course, there are ballet shoes, tap shoes, jazz shoes, leotards, Nutcracker tickets, etc., but I just buy those as needed.  Both girls take art once a week.  That is $200 a month for both.  They both do dog agility.  That is $180 for 7 weeks.  Gymnastics once a week is $146 a month for both girls.

 

However, our big expense is our older daughter's horseback riding.  The riding lessons themselves aren't bad ($65/an hour per private lesson).  She takes at least two privates a week.  The big expense is that we bought her a horse a couple of years ago.   :scared:   That's pricey!!  The bill from our barn is at least $1,000 a month-- much more doing show season.  And, of course, that doesn't include all of the horse tack, plus her riding clothes, boots, gloves, show clothing, etc.  Whew!

 

It is worth it to us though.  They are well-adjusted and happy and active.  I don't know that we'd do this much if we didn't homeschool, but for now it works for us.  

[sunnyday]

For a kid who has motor issues running and playing outside does not come naturally. Even when forced the child may not get as much exercise as he needs. As one poster said paying for gymnastics is cheaper than OT. 

 

If you have only had children without physical deficits, it may be hard to imagine. Many dc naturally do run and climb a lot etc when outside. For those who don't because they can't or they've given up because it's just hard to enjoy that kind of play, then enrolling in organized activities is a replacement. 

 

Yep, several people mentioned organized sports as a benefit to their kids with gross motor issues, and that sounds like a great reason to enroll in paid activities!

 

But I was just addressing the folks who didn't qualify their statement when they said something to the effect of, physical outlets are good for all children therefore any amount of paid extracurriculars are justifiable. It felt like, however obvious, someone had to say that public parks are a very fine physical outlet for many children. :) (Yes, even in an area where the sun sets at 4:15pm in midwinter...)

[SKL]

public parks are a very fine physical outlet for many children. :) (Yes, even in an area where the sun sets at 4:15pm in midwinter...)

 

To each her own, but I'm not taking my kids to the park at 6:30pm on a winter night.  ;)  Around here that wouldn't even be legal, since the parks close at dusk.  And there isn't much to do there in the winter - everything is cold to the touch, slippery, wet, and there's nobody around to interact with.  I guess we could play outside in our yard or shovel snow in the dark, but frankly, I don't feel like doing that on a daily basis.  Once in a while, sure, but then the novelty wears off and one's fingers and toes start hurting . . . .  Sending my kids out alone to play in the night isn't a great idea because of the foxes, coyotes, etc. which hang around here . . . .

 

ETA:  I would much prefer outdoor activities, if that were a realistic choice for us.  It's all I did as a kid, but then, I walked home from school around 3pm and had time to play outside before it got dark.  And all the other kids in the neighborhood were out there too.  That just isn't the reality in the here and now.

[Annie G]

 (Yes, even in an area where the sun sets at 4:15pm in midwinter...)

 

Our kids did their share of playing outdoors in the winter when they were little, but winter here isn't just about darkness.  When the average daily low is 8, and it doesn't get out of the low teens during the day, playing outside is not as effective as summer outdoor playing. Even kids get too cold and wet playing in the snow and climbing and running in frigid weather. 

 

Paying for extracurricular activities during the winter kept my kids from going stir crazy, and kept me from going off the deep end - dealing with mounds of wet snow boots, gloves, hats, snow pants, etc. is NOT fun for months on end. 

 

Having said that, we actually chose extracurricular activities based on time commitment rather than cost.  We wanted the kids to have activities they loved but couldn't devote every afternoon/evening to that kind of thing. Some families thrive on always being busy but our kids did better with one main extracurricular and a class or two every week. For our youngest two, that meant musical theater was the main thing but they also took things like art classes or science classes at a local museum. 

 

I'm impressed that some of you can manage having multiple kids in multiple activities each week!

[Danestress]

 

But I was just addressing the folks who didn't qualify their statement when they said something to the effect of, physical outlets are good for all children therefore any amount of paid extracurriculars are justifiable. It felt like, however obvious, someone had to say that public parks are a very fine physical outlet for many children. :) (Yes, even in an area where the sun sets at 4:15pm

No one here needs to justify their choices to anyone else. You don't have to justify opting out of extracurricular activities, and parents who have kids training hard in music, sports etc don't have to justify to a single soul.

[sunnyday]

I grew up in Alaska, so perhaps I am overly romanticizing the days of twilight snowball fights and subsequent hot cocoa. ;)

[ThatHomeschoolDad]

Budget?  What budget?  We just squeeze more blood from the stone each month and somehow the universe seems to provide.  Dance is up to few hundred a month, but so far, we've been able to schedule four classes into two nights, so it's not crazed.  Being an independent Juliette Girl Scout helps avoid little fees here and there, although we are making payments for DD to go on a huge GS trip to London and Paris in two years.

 

Our biggest expense may turn out to be the NJ Youth Chorus, since DD just auditioned into the Advanced Choir after 6 years in the training choirs.   DD got a partial scholarship, and this is the one activity that is so soul-nourishing, so professional, I can't imagine us NOT doing it.  Advanced tours and records and has heavy gigs with orchestras and such, so the travel and ticket prices might start to add up, but I can always sneak in since I'm married to the accompanist's page-turner!