Young adults/older child and your income...

[*Lulu*]

 

 

FAFSA applications are processed by the federal Department of Education, not the college. They send a report with the "expected family contribution" and what federal aid the student qualifies for so the school can package it together with scholarships as part of a total aid package. Schools don't want to drain their endowments on aid to students who would otherwise be receiving federal grants, which is why they want all students to submit a FAFSA.

 

I have heard of some private colleges asking for parent financial information directly, but I assume that's for schools that have extensive, privately funded need-based scholarships. Some of the Ivies meet 100% of need for students whose parents make under a certain income limit.

 

I do not know how it is done now, but 15-ish years ago I worked for my university's financial aid office and we had hard copies of each student's FAFSA in thier file. I spent the better part of a month filing them each year.

 

I can see not wanting your SS number floating around, but beyond that cannot think of any other info. on a FAFSA that could be used to harm someone. Has the form really changed all that much?

 

 

Edited for grammar and spelling. Geeez, maybe I should not post after my bedtime!

[TranquilMind]

Who do you think is seeing this information?

 

Who knows? Whomever is paying the College Board and the lenders for this information, I suppose.

[BarbecueMom]

 

 

I do not know how it is done now, but 15-ish years ago I worked for my universities financial aid office and we had hard copies of each student's FAFSA in thier file. I spent the better part of a month filing them each year.

 

When my brother was applying back in 2010, everything was done online, and I think they send electronic copies now. I didn't think they contained all the info requested on the original form, but I may have misread something.

[Mrs Mungo]

 

 

Who knows? Whomever is paying the College Board and the lenders for this information, I suppose.

 

What has the College Board got to do with it?

[Sisyphus]

Wendy, I get it. My "peer group" is people whose parents paid for 4 years at Colombia or Rutgers. They never worked in high school or college. There was never, ever an expectation that college wouldn't be a fun way to spend 4 years (or 8 as most have advanced degrees) living in am sorority house, taking a semester in Italy, and finding themselves. My own experience?

 

Yeah. Not so much.

 

My parents basically imploded when I was in 8 th grade, which is a damn shame as I was (am) a pretty brilliant kid. I was admitted to a program at UW to start college in 7th grade, but my parents thought I'd be socially an oddball, so they thought I ought not. Then the next year my dad got sick, and things just went to hell. If only I'd taken the chance-! No FAFSA for me, I spent my senior year couch surfing as my parents were basically homeless and there was no room for me at my grandparents. I applied to Stanford, and got accepted (I always loved Califprnia, being from rainy, gray Washington state!) but going? No. Not even to my local community college. Worked at IHOP (by the way, from 84-89, I worked many 2 am shifts?) and a clothing store and a nursing home. Barely made it. Gave up, joined the army.

 

And here I am. Did the experience make me stronger? I suppose. But it's embarrassing as hell to hear stories of peoples junior year of college, when I was...sleeping at a friends, juggling 3 jobs, and trying to figure out how to afford not just school but books, a parking pass (that was a big deal), and you know...food.

 

I would not wish that on anyone. I may not be able to afford to give my children help for college, but I can fill out the goddog FORM! My dads reasoning? He didn't want me to know they'd made just 6000 dollars that year. Um, I'm homeless dad, I think I figured it out. They saw no benefit to college, they were way too wrapped up in their own lives (understandably) to care. But I was totally at their mercy. And it's just wrong, however you justify it with your "I'm fighting the SySTEM, yo!" rhetoric. Fight the system to your hearts content with letters, petitions and calls to your congressman. But fill out the mother fencing form!

[Barbara H]

Here's my three cents:

1. The vast majority of parents fill out the FAFSA without their kids anyway. The FAFSA is filled out online and it is really quite easy to get done - most people are able to get it finished in 20 to 30 minutes. I have no see no reports of personal information being stolen as a result of the FAFSA.

 

2. My personal experience was a lot like what I see when I look at the research about student employment. Working part time in college - 10 to 15 hours, especially on campus work study is good for students. Working full time leads to lower college performance and lower graduation rates. Campus work study (which I was able to get because my parents filled out the FAFSA) allowed me to begin to develop skills as a writing tutor and those are skills I still use in my work today. The fact that I wasn't working too many hours allowed me to have an unpaid internship which led directly to my first post college professional job. The research is very clear that students who have internships have better employment prospects after graduation. The fact that I wasn't working full time gave me the time to build the academic profile that allowed me to be paid to go to graduate school. Obviously we all have to do what we have to do... I worked long hours during summers often at pretty unpleasant jobs. But, especially with the high cost of tuition and the very high rate of youth unemployment, we need to be realistic about how many hours students can work and do well.

 

3. You can decide how much you want to share about your personal financial situation, but financial literacy is a crucial skill all of our kids need as they head into adulthood. Here are a couple of articles from my site that I hope you find to be helpful.

Big Talk Money and College

Personal Finance for Homeschoolers

[Barbara H]

 

Who knows? Whomever is paying the College Board and the lenders for this information, I suppose.

 

You may be think of the PROFILE the College Board's financial form. This is only used by a small number of colleges, mostly private more elite schools. The form that is filled out for federal and state financial aid is the FAFSA and that is run through the government. You file online much like income taxes. Your information is encrypted and shared only with specific entities (colleges or state) that you request.

[TranquilMind]

What has the College Board got to do with it?

 

Nothing. Never mind. Distracted What else is new? :o

 

Actually, next poster clarifies that there is indeed a College board form, at least.

[TranquilMind]

 

You may be think of the PROFILE the College Board's financial form. This is only used by a small number of colleges, mostly private more elite schools. The form that is filled out for federal and state financial aid is the FAFSA and that is run through the government. You file online much like income taxes. Your information is encrypted and shared only with specific entities (colleges or state) that you request.

 

Thank you for clarifying! Yes, I remember hearing about this, but did not recall the name.

[Arcadia]

Campus work study (which I was able to get because my parents filled out the FAFSA) allowed me to begin to develop skills as a writing tutor and those are skills I still use in my work today.

 

As a foreigner here, I do not understand why campus work study is tied to FAFSA.

I worked on campus as a student assistant but I was never asked about my financial situation. I would never have qualified if campus jobs for students are given out based on family income.

[TranquilMind]

Wendy, I get it. My "peer group" is people whose parents paid for 4 years at Colombia or Rutgers. They never worked in high school or college. There was never, ever an expectation that college wouldn't be a fun way to spend 4 years (or 8 as most have advanced degrees) living in am sorority house, taking a semester in Italy, and finding themselves. My own experience?

 

Yeah. Not so much.

 

My parents basically imploded when I was in 8 th grade, which is a damn shame as I was (am) a pretty brilliant kid. I was admitted to a program at UW to start college in 7th grade, but my parents thought I'd be socially an oddball, so they thought I ought not. Then the next year my dad got sick, and things just went to hell. If only I'd taken the chance-! No FAFSA for me, I spent my senior year couch surfing as my parents were basically homeless and there was no room for me at my grandparents. I applied to Stanford, and got accepted (I always loved Califprnia, being from rainy, gray Washington state!) but going? No. Not even to my local community college. Worked at IHOP (by the way, from 84-89, I worked many 2 am shifts?) and a clothing store and a nursing home. Barely made it. Gave up, joined the army.

 

And here I am. Did the experience make me stronger? I suppose. But it's embarrassing as hell to hear stories of peoples junior year of college, when I was...sleeping at a friends, juggling 3 jobs, and trying to figure out how to afford not just school but books, a parking pass (that was a big deal), and you know...food.

 

I would not wish that on anyone. I may not be able to afford to give my children help for college, but I can fill out the goddog FORM! My dads reasoning? He didn't want me to know they'd made just 6000 dollars that year. Um, I'm homeless dad, I think I figured it out. They saw no benefit to college, they were way too wrapped up in their own lives (understandably) to care. But I was totally at their mercy. And it's just wrong, however you justify it with your "I'm fighting the SySTEM, yo!" rhetoric. Fight the system to your hearts content with letters, petitions and calls to your congressman. But fill out the mother fencing form!

 

I'm sorry all this happened for you.

 

My home life was pretty disrupted in high school, but at least I got to go a few years later. No one filled out the FAFSA for me though, but I qualifed as an adult.

 

I would think your parents would have been quick to fill out the form with that low income, as you would have benefited tremendously, and you don't mention that they had privacy concerns.

[Barbara H]

A percent of the student's salary is subsidized through federal dollars, so that's why it is needs based. Some colleges have campus jobs that are not connected to work study, but there may be fewer options. Also, it may be helpful to know that the cutoff for work study is quite high - it is not just low income kids who qualify but many middle class families.

[Sisyphus]

No, the privacy concerns because of the low income were exactly why they wouldn't fill it out. They didn't want m e to know. I found out a few years after I got married- my dad inexplicably told my dh.

 

I qualified for a lot of merit aid, but the 7000 gap and the fact that I had no way to get to California was insurmountable. I didnt have a license until joining the army- I had no car to practice driving on, and my parents could not afford drivers Ed in high school.I couldn't concieve how I would make the extra money, books, a place to live (at least where I was, I had friends), and the thing that stuck out was a parking pass and meal plan. I couldn't make that money, no matter how many jobs I worked. I have no doubt that with parental info, I would have gotten much aid...but without it, I simply swung in the wind. Which is my point- don't do that!

[karenmb]

I do think it's a rotten thing not to fill out the FAFSA, if you understand the consequence which not everybody does.

 

But it's a rottener thing to be put into the position where you have to choose between privacy and your child's future.

 

As has been extensively discussed on this thread, it is very difficult to succeed in life in the US without at least some college. OK, that's the society we live in, and maybe that's not so bad, but the rules that run the college games are ones that none of us chose. We have zero input on admissions policies and financial aid. We just have to like it or lump it and the consequences for lumping it are *very serious.*

 

As for people not being able to imagine any situations where middle aged adults wouldn't want their 18yo to know intimate details of their financial situation... really? Give it some thought. The repeated "why wouldn't you just tell" is silly. There are all kinds of reasons - many 18yos *don't have married parents* is the most obvious one but there are a lot more.

[QueenCat]

 

I'm not keen on schools using the FAFSA to determine merit aid, but I've seen many discussions on this board about how a poor student with a high GPA and SAT score might be more deserving of admission or a scholarship than an affluent kid with an almost perfect SAT and above 4.0 GPA. I don't see how schools can figure that out without some independent confirmation of the socio-economic status of the student.

 

Ds's school requires one to submit the FAFSA as part of the scholarship application problem. HOWEVER, it does not determine merit aid. At his school, if you have a certain ACT score or higher, along with a specific gpa or higher, you get the Presidential scholarship. Finances don't matter. Same thing with the state Hope scholarship. But they both require sending the FAFSA in as part of their process. They don't look at the scholarship apps until ALL documentation is sent in.

[QueenCat]

As a foreigner here, I do not understand why campus work study is tied to FAFSA.

I worked on campus as a student assistant but I was never asked about my financial situation. I would never have qualified if campus jobs for students are given out based on family income.

 

At ds's school, some student assistant jobs are available to any student but not many. Those are usually found at the food court, the cafeteria and some lab jobs. Most student jobs are for students with financial need, as part of their aid package.

[*Lulu*]

 

 

At ds's school, some student assistant jobs are available to any student but not many. Those are usually found at the food court, the cafeteria and some lab jobs. Most student jobs are for students with financial need, as part of their aid package.

 

 

The university where DH and I attended was this way as well. Both DH and I had packages that allowed us to take two campus jobs. After the first two weeks the jobs no longer had to be held for the aid packages and any "leftover" positions could be filled by anyone that wanted the jobs. It is how one year DH and I were able to work 3 and 4 jobs each. It was good for both of us since we had no off campus transportation at that time.

[ChocolateReignRemix]

As for people not being able to imagine any situations where middle aged adults wouldn't want their 18yo to know intimate details of their financial situation... really? Give it some thought. The repeated "why wouldn't you just tell" is silly. There are all kinds of reasons - many 18yos *don't have married parents* is the most obvious one but there are a lot more.

 

 

Nope. Can't come up with a good one.

[BarbecueMom]

As for people not being able to imagine any situations where middle aged adults wouldn't want their 18yo to know intimate details of their financial situation... really? Give it some thought. The repeated "why wouldn't you just tell" is silly. There are all kinds of reasons - many 18yos *don't have married parents* is the most obvious one but there are a lot more.

 

 

I don't understand this. Why would a single parent NOT keep their adult child apprised of their financial situation? I am the adult next-of-kin (or whatever the legal term is) for my mother, and have been since the day I turned 18. If anything had happened to her after that day, I would have been the one responsible for dealing with her estate, and I would have also become the guardian for my younger brother. Withholding financial information from me at that point would have been highly irresponsible.

 

I have a friend who lost both parents during college. They (her and a younger sibling) were the ones dealing with their parents' estates and finances, selling the house, handling lawsuits, taking care of insurance, and closing out accounts. Imagine how much harder that would have been if they hadn't been prepared and aware of the financial situation ahead of time.

 

The only situation I can imagine for completely withholding information would be an adult child who could not be trusted. I'm thinking of the kids who set up their own parents to be robbed or trick them into signing over accounts or titles. Rare cases.

[lea_lpz]

 

 

I earned more than $1.5k per month or more giving tution at a time when my school/tution fees were less than $6k per year and dorm rent was $400 per month. My university's computer center also pays higher than a living wage for undergrads working there as student assistant.

My parents paid for my school fees in cash but I could have afford to pay them back and still have money left over for savings.

 

I earned about a 1,000 a month (net) working part time as a waitress and later as a make up consultant at Macy's while going to community college. When I transferred 2 years later to UC Berkeley I had saved $10,000 and had paid for my own books, units, gas, lunch and misc. expenses (clothes, going out with friends) while in community college and then saved half my paycheck and used the other half. I made with tips as a waitress and commission at Macy's about an average $18 an hour and this was between 18-21. I also transferred with a 3.7 GPA. I didn't feel it was too much on my plate. My parents had no problem filling out the FAFSA but I did not qualify for any aid but loans. I remember being surprised at what they made too, but it made me realize at the same time that even though it seemed like a lot, we were only middle class.

 

When I transferred I had a part time work study job that paid $12 hr, but tax free (I got married right before transfering so was no longer a dependent). I had experience though, so this was the highest pay they'd give a receptionist at the Transfer Center.

 

I had to take out some loans at UCB, that was because the rent was really high out there and I had my dd a year and a half after transferring.

 

However, if a student goes to community college, transfers to a state college he / she can commute to and live at home, then yes, earning $12,000 a year would pay tuition, transportation, books, lunch, and extras. In California CSU tutition is only $3000 a semester.

 

[TranquilMind]

 

Ds's school requires one to submit the FAFSA as part of the scholarship application problem. HOWEVER, it does not determine merit aid. At his school, if you have a certain ACT score or higher, along with a specific gpa or higher, you get the Presidential scholarship. Finances don't matter. Same thing with the state Hope scholarship. But they both require sending the FAFSA in as part of their process. They don't look at the scholarship apps until ALL documentation is sent in.

 

 

Why? What is the reason for demanding something that isn't even relevant? I wish someone could answer this question.

[karenmb]

I want to reiterate that no one should have to come up with a good reason. Just not wanting to is plenty.

 

But the most obvious one is that if you are in an acrimonious divorce you could have plenty of good reasons to be hiding all kinds of things. And a pleasant co-parenting relationship post-divorce can turn very ugly very fast.

 

Haven't any of you seen this? Remember that all married step-parents have to fill out the FAFSA too. And those step-parents can have ex-spouses themselves and other children they're supporting. And remember that child support doesn't end at 18 in most states, it continues through university.

 

I do think that most people who refuse to fill out the FAFSA are not doing it for legitimate reasons - in most cases I think people just don't understand - but so what. I can't understand why there's so much acrimony expressed at people who are themselves being played by an absurdly complicated system that isn't serving anyone's needs, except I guess the needs of the people making 100k+ as admissions directors.

[ChocolateReignRemix]

I want to reiterate that no one should have to come up with a good reason. Just not wanting to is plenty.

 

But the most obvious one is that if you are in an acrimonious divorce you could have plenty of good reasons to be hiding all kinds of things. And a pleasant co-parenting relationship post-divorce can turn very ugly very fast.

 

Haven't any of you seen this? Remember that all married step-parents have to fill out the FAFSA too. And those step-parents can have ex-spouses themselves and other children they're supporting. And remember that child support doesn't end at 18 in most states, it continues through university.

 

I do think that most people who refuse to fill out the FAFSA are not doing it for legitimate reasons - in most cases I think people just don't understand - but so what. I can't understand why there's so much acrimony expressed at people who are themselves being played by an absurdly complicated system that isn't serving anyone's needs, except I guess the needs of the people making 100k+ as admissions directors.

 

 

Nope. I don't consider hiding assets during a divorce to be a valid reason.

[BarbecueMom]

 

 

Why? What is the reason for demanding something that isn't even relevant? I wish someone could answer this question.

 

1) Limited scholarship endowments. When my federal aid package was slightly reduced after a verification, my college bumped up my merit scholarship a bit to keep my total aid package the same. They weren't going to raise it before that, because the federal aid was covering it. Making sure all students who could possibly qualify for aid get it first means there's more scholarship money to go around. Also, I can see where some families may refuse the FAFSA so Stafford loans wouldn't be considered as part of their aid package in an attempt to get more grants and scholarships. You don't have to accept federal loans (I didn't until my final year), but that's not right to try to weasel more non-repayable aid out of the school because you don't want to borrow. No one really *wants* to take loans.

 

2) Rankings. My college in particular was proud of its "best value college" ranking, and it was a big selling point for the school. Percentage of students getting aid is one of the big numbers. Not saying that it's a good reason, it just is what it is.

[SKL]

Well, here's another perspective. IF you're willing and able to foot the bill yourself, or your child has a free ride without a FAFSA, or some combination thereof, then I can understand refusing to provide the financial info. If you're so well-off that your kid isn't going to qualify for most kinds of aid linked to the FAFSA, then the pros/cons analysis is different.

 

But to those who cite privacy vs. their own kids / ex spouses etc., the logical alternative is to have the kid fill out the rest of the application, then you fill the financial stuff out and send it without showing it to anyone.

 

My niece got a 50% scholarship to go to a college she liked. However, even with the scholarship and all the subsidies available, the "family contribution" was too high. My niece had gotten her hopes way up by going through the whole process, and while she still ended up going to college, she was very disappointed. Frankly, her parents should have managed her expectations better, and that probably includes not assisting in an application for something that isn't going to be feasible in the end. So maybe this plays into some parents' decision not to complete the FAFSA.

[Murphy101]

Having young adult children that have waived by their actions any right to parental anything is actually fairly common.

 

My sister has a son with a prison record by age 18. He talked his parole officer into calling and asking her to submit FAFSA info and she refused. She wanted nothing to do with him ever again and I don't blame her. I'm sure there are plenty of families like hers.

[Murphy101]

That's true too SKL. Dh and I were discussing it last night. Dh pointed out that there is no way in hades he would submit a fafsa for Harvard. Why? Because there is absolutely no way our sons could attend Harvard without a wild insane amount of debt and we do not want to encourage such debt. We may not be able to stop them getting that debt on their own, but we would feel no guilt at all about refusing to participate in them getting it.

[*Lulu*]

Having young adult children that have waived by their actions any right to parental anything is actually fairly common.

 

My sister has a son with a prison record by age 18. He talked his parole officer into calling and asking her to submit FAFSA info and she refused. She wanted nothing to do with him ever again and I don't blame her. I'm sure there are plenty of families like hers.

 

If i was in charge of the world there would be a form that could be filled out, noterized even, certifying that the adult was financially independent from thier family. Or the young adult's tax return showing they are not claimed anyone else in addition to the form and some other utility or rent agreement in the young adult's name would exempt them from the FAFSA.

 

Sadly I am not. Which is why I still have to fold my own laundry.

[Mrs Mungo]

That's true too SKL. Dh and I were discussing it last night. Dh pointed out that there is no way in hades he would submit a fafsa for Harvard. Why? Because there is absolutely no way our sons could attend Harvard without a wild insane amount of debt and we do not want to encourage such debt. We may not be able to stop them getting that debt on their own, but we would feel no guilt at all about refusing to participate in them getting it.

 

Not necessarily true. Schools like Harvard receive a lot of endowments. This means they are able to provide better financial aid packages than most state universities. Much of that aid comes in the form of grants and work-study.

 

http://www.admissions.college.harvard.edu/financial_aid/hfai/index.html

[katilac]

That's true too SKL. Dh and I were discussing it last night. Dh pointed out that there is no way in hades he would submit a fafsa for Harvard. Why? Because there is absolutely no way our sons could attend Harvard without a wild insane amount of debt and we do not want to encourage such debt. We may not be able to stop them getting that debt on their own, but we would feel no guilt at all about refusing to participate in them getting it.

 

 

Are you sure about that? Harvard is known for having generous aid packages. Currently, parents who make less than $65,000 do not have to contribute ANY money. So, you pay nothing until that point, and increasing amounts after that. A simplified and more equitable plan (according to Harvard, of course) will be fully in place by 2016, with those making from $65,000 to $150,000 expected to pay anywhere from zero to 10% of income in contributions. Students may be expected to work campus jobs. That's very, very doable for many people.

 

I wanted to point that out, b/c I find that many, many people assume their kids cannot go to certain colleges, when the reality is that they could - and that sometimes the aid package offered by a certain college may result in the family paying LESS money, even though the stated tuition is far higher.

 

Never tell yourself no. Research all the possibilities. Many universities now have financial calculators that will give you a rough idea of the expected family contribution (based on anticipated income and test scores, etc).

[Jane in NC]

I wanted to point that out, b/c I find that many, many people assume their kids cannot go to certain colleges, when the reality is that they could - and that sometimes the aid package offered by a certain college may result in the family paying LESS money, even though the stated tuition is far higher.

 

 

Right. Those with students preparing to apply to colleges will also want to study the net price calculator for the various schools on the IPEDS College Navigator website (a government reporting site). Sticker price and the net price that the average student pays can be quite different.

[Murphy101]

Yes, I am certain that Harvard is no where near the cost of living at home and going in state in Oklahoma.

[Murphy101]

Tho I'll be honest and say if Harvard offered something they couldn't get here and wanted, I'd at least consider it.

 

So far, neither need to go to Harvard for machining and piloting.

 

But I have 8 others so who knows for them.

[Murphy101]

Right. Those with students preparing to apply to colleges will also want to study the net price calculator for the various schools on the IPEDS College Navigator website (a government reporting site). Sticker price and the net price that the average student pays can be quite different.

 

Thanks for the tip. Interesting site.

[QueenCat]

Why? What is the reason for demanding something that isn't even relevant? I wish someone could answer this question.

 

 

I don't know..... for the state scholarship, all state schools have to do it.... But I wasn't going to have ds not get the scholarship just because we knew he wasn't getting any needs based money so I filled out the FAFSA, as stupid as I thought it was.... It wasn't a hill to die on for me, as there was another I was going to be willing to do so on for my younger child, when he got to the same school (at least I expected to).

[fraidycat]

We have no reason to keep our income from our children. All any of you need to know is my husband's rank and each and every one of you can look it up for yourselves. ;)

[TravelingChris]

:Like Fraidycat, any one who is curious can look up my dh's rank, where we live and how many years he has been in, and get a very good estimate of how much we earn. All you would be missing is dividends and interest (and interest is nearly zero nowadays anyway).

 

Dh and I actually got on our youngest's case last night because she was telling us about some guy who went to an expensive restaurant and left a 1cent tip and she seemed to think it had to do with his wealth (or probably income). It seems like she has incorporated the media bias of the myth that wealthy are more likely to be jerks. We then went on to emphasize to her that there are rich jerks, poor jerks and middle income jerks and money has nothing to do with whether one is a jerk. We also told her that not only was she dissing her adult friends this way but to many minds, even here, she was essentially dissing herself.

[SKL]

 

Dh and I actually got on our youngest's case last night because she was telling us about some guy who went to an expensive restaurant and left a 1cent tip and she seemed to think it had to do with his wealth (or probably income). It seems like she has incorporated the media bias of the myth that wealthy are more likely to be jerks. We then went on to emphasize to her that there are rich jerks, poor jerks and middle income jerks and money has nothing to do with whether one is a jerk. We also told her that not only was she dissing her adult friends this way but to many minds, even here, she was essentially dissing herself.

 

 

This is what I observed from many privileged young people in college / grad school. Complaining one minute that they "only " got jet skis for Christmas, and the next minute saying they hate their dad (who was bankrolling their education) for being part of Corporate America. Coming from the other side of the tracks, it was quite obvious and amusing to me.

 

I must make a note to teach my kids about hypocrisy as they grow up.

 

(I would also note that a one-cent tip is never about being cheap. It's about sending a message that the service was terrible, which may have been the case.)

[karenmb]

Just because I can look up someone's rank doesn't mean I know their income. You could own rental property, you could have a side hustle, you could have inherited a guano cavern in Peru.

 

And again, I'm really baffled that I have to spell this out - I am not talking about hiding asserts during a divorce, I am talking about the very common situation where a previously pleasant co-parenting relationship falls apart when it comes time to pay for college. If people really think that every divorced person should be punished forever by being required to publish their financial situation to their ex's current spouse and that new spouse's ex, why not just require divorced people to wear giant scarlet A's and get it over with.

 

This is not a situation I am in personally, btw, but it was very common 20 years ago among my friends when we were applying to college. It can get so rancorous that it's probably one of the reasons the divorce rate dropped so fast among the rich.

[Arcadia]

We have no reason to keep our income from our children. All any of you need to know is my husband's rank and each and every one of you can look it up for yourselves. ;)

:Like Fraidycat, any one who is curious can look up my dh's rank, where we live and how many years he has been in, and get a very good estimate of how much we earn. All you would be missing is dividends and interest (and interest is nearly zero nowadays anyway).

 

There are people out there who have more monetary assets than their annual pay. I have a late cousin who was a civil servant, owns four houses and have plenty in the bank. His pay slip is a small portion of his total assets. Their family home is also the cheapest of all the houses they own, they rented out the rest. There are people who play down how "rich" they are.

 

. (I would also note that a one-cent tip is never about being cheap. It's about sending a message that the service was terrible, which may have been the case.)

 

We ever gave zero tip and just take away the rest of the food because the service was so bad but the food was yummy. Those are the places we take away if we ever want to eat there again.

[kitten18]

Just because I can look up someone's rank doesn't mean I know their income. You could own rental property, you could have a side hustle, you could have inherited a guano cavern in Peru. And again, I'm really baffled that I have to spell this out - I am not talking about hiding asserts during a divorce, I am talking about the very common situation where a previously pleasant co-parenting relationship falls apart when it comes time to pay for college. If people really think that every divorced person should be punished forever by being required to publish their financial situation to their ex's current spouse and that new spouse's ex, why not just require divorced people to wear giant scarlet A's and get it over with. This is not a situation I am in personally, btw, but it was very common 20 years ago among my friends when we were applying to college. It can get so rancorous that it's probably one of the reasons the divorce rate dropped so fast among the rich.

IMO, the parents need to get over themselves! It is NOT about them.

[BarbecueMom]

 

IMO, the parents need to get over themselves! It is NOT about them.

 

I agree, and call baloney on the "co-parenting falling apart" thing. My parents have always had a hostile co-parenting relationship, my mother has never had any clue what my dad makes (even through lawyers and child support issues), yet my brother and I both were able to apply for financial aid. Heck, at age 18, neither us had a great relationship with our dad, yet we weren't held back from FAFSA information. And yes, dad is married with a working wife, stepchild, and another child in common. Neither of our parents are jerks who would willing to hold back information that would keep us out of college simply because half our DNA comes from "the untrustworthy ex".

[beaners]

FAFSA applications are processed by the federal Department of Education, not the college. They send a report with the "expected family contribution" and what federal aid the student qualifies for so the school can package it together with scholarships as part of a total aid package. Schools don't want to drain their endowments on aid to students who would otherwise be receiving federal grants, which is why they want all students to submit a FAFSA. I have heard of some private colleges asking for parent financial information directly, but I assume that's for schools that have extensive, privately funded need-based scholarships. Some of the Ivies meet 100% of need for students whose parents make under a certain income limit.

 

 

Thank you for posting this so clearly. THIS is why the schools want a FAFSA. You might know that you won't qualify for need-based aid, but the school doesn't without those numbers.

[Scarlett]

IMO, the parents need to get over themselves! It is NOT about them.

 

Yeah, I agree. I don't want my XH knowing what my current dh makes. In fact he has point blank asked and even begged for me to tell him. I suspect the reason he wants to know is so he can measure his worth against my dh. What.ever. But if I had to fill out paperwork for ds that XH will see, oh well. It might not be my choice but really what can XH do with that info?

 

It gets trickier with dh's XW because he pays her cs. So she can know what dh makes....but it is not information that we give to her without a court order. Even still we would not withhold info from his sons if they needed it for college. If we could submit the paperwork without her seeing it that would be our choice.