If you have delted your facebook account... (this is sort of a jawm)

[shanvan]

please tell me why. I think I would like to get off facebook. I rarely visit my page and when I do I get annoyed by the one-up-manship I see in the posts about other parents kids. My dc have plenty of accomplishments I could post, but I don't do it anymore b/c I'm starting to think it feeds into the other parents' warpped idea of 'friendship' meaning competition.

 

Also tired of the patting on the back that goes on after every event. And the ones that really get me are the posts where people wish other people (like their kids) a happy birthday as though they are somehow communicating across the miles when I know they are right there in the room! Can't you just say 'happy birthday' to your own kid or husband? If you really feel the need to put it on facebook, just post how happy you are b/c it is so and so's birthday, don't act like your only form of communication is through facebook. I get images in my head of the person who is posting sitting at one computer in the house, while the kid is in another room on another computer reading the message. It's creepy. I do know that there are times when people may not be with their kids or husbands and might post a message to them, but I'm talking about people who habitually post 'messages' to family members who are most likely in the next room.

 

But then, there are a few people who rarely post annoying stuff and do live far away and I'd like to keep up with them. I'm thinking I could just use e mail. But then what about the offers companies give through facebook?

 

Anyway... if you deleted your account, tell me why. Make me take the step to get rid of my account.

[Tohru]

I did. I deleted it and didn't tell any one so every one thought I defriended them. Sad.

 

The reasons were I was getting annoyed.

There were people I liked IRL, but then I would see their posts and start not liking them.

Or I would feel left out if I was invited to events.

Then I started feeling like a stalker or peeping-tom whenever I read other people's posts. It was just creepy.

Oh and of course the drama. Oh my the drama! I had friends on two ends of the spectrum of whatever issue and they would bicker on my wall. Ridiculous.

 

So I deactivated my account. At first I went through withdrawals, so I deleted the beast (I think it takes 10 days). After that, I was so happy and relieved.

 

HOWEVER, after being gone for over a year, I wound up having to come back just to email certain people that don't have regular email. But then other people started befriending me and now I'm getting to the same place I was before I deleted the account. :glare:

[PrairieSong]

It is easy to control whose posts you see. You can set it so they are completely hidden (I have done this to people who rant constantly) or you can see "most posts" or "only important posts".

 

I like being in touch with relatives and friends who live far away. I like seeing photos of their kids, etc.

 

BUT...there is life outside of Facebook! Go ahead and delete it if that is what you want to do. I've considered it myself, but instead I adjusted my settings.

[amyco]

I deleted it because I decided it was a big invasion of privacy, I felt phony in that I was trying to control how others saw me because of what I posted, and I was wasting too much time on it. I didn't really tell anyone, and only one person seemed to notice. I do miss a few people and seeing the pictures of family.

 

Also I am bugged by the financial side of it...does no one wonder why Facebook is free? According to Nick Carr of the RoughType blog, its users are all digital sharecroppers for Facebook. Facebook makes money by selling your data--whatever you "like" or click on, even your school info, anything--is little data mined and sold. That is how they make money, and that is why it does not "cost" the user anything. I'm not willing to pay that free cost. Many are willing which is why it thrives.

[LaxMom]

I don't use mine, except to see team pictures from our lacrosse games (posted to the team FB page by the coach's wife). It's absurd, really, because we take thousands of pictures (literally) every time they play. I really should just delete.

 

I don't use it for the same reasons mentioned:

 

• I don't care to know what you've eaten for breakfast and/or the gps location of your bowl.
  
• I don't care to be invited, along with 800 other friends, to every in-person and virtual sale party you and everyone else you've ever met have.
  
• I really don't have space in my life for passive-aggressive, whether it is:
  -- barely veiled complaints about "some people",
  -- how awesome your husband/child/friend/whoever is (and, by implied comparison, the rest of the world is not),
  -- how you don't complain (except please express sympathy for this train wreck du jour), or
  -- any other thing you're saying but not saying
  
• Nor do I have space for your 16,000 computer game performance updates, the article that 3,000,000 other people have also shared, or your religious/political rants and forwards (even if I actually agree)
  

 

 

In a nutshell, I have grown weary of the cultural narcissism.

 

I think my husband and kids (and friends) are pretty awesome. I tell them. To their faces. Often. Sometimes, I even just randomly text my husband while he's at work, to tell him I love him. Because I do. Sometimes, I text him at work to point out that he left an inconvenient mess or forgot something or whatever. Because he did. I don't think anyone else needs to be a part of any of those exchanges. It's creepy that such earth-shattering things like "where the he!! did you hide the can opener?" or "love you, honey! " , along with its response, could be "liked" by hundreds of people.

I talk politics/religion/life with my friends. Sometimes it's quite passionate, but it's always civil, and nobody drops a convenient blurb that supports/justifies their position and then disappears without bothering to engage commentary.

If I read something I think will be interesting to friends, I may share it in Google Reader or just email the link. My friends do the same. No need to share with hundreds when two friends share a similar interest, kwim?

 

And there you have it. Way too many words to express my for Facebook.

Edited June 27, 2012 by MyCrazyHouse

[Tammyla]

:iagree:

 

Plan to be pressured to open it back up.

[Jaz]

I deleted it because I decided it was a big invasion of privacy, I felt phony in that I was trying to control how others saw me because of what I posted, and I was wasting too much time on it. I didn't really tell anyone, and only one person seemed to notice. I do miss a few people and seeing the pictures of family.

 

Also I am bugged by the financial side of it.

 

:iagree:I also didn't like how their privacy policy kept changing.

[Liz CA]

I have never started on FB, perhaps this makes it easier but I stay in contact with those who are out of reach by email.

I feel much safer that way - even though email can be hacked too. There have been some disturbing events on FB, behind the scenes. Breaking into people's accounts, swiping pics (hint: don't post any pics of young girls in bathing suits or diapers!), stalking, just to mention a few.

There is also the old-fashioned letter. Since hardly anyone writes anymore, it's such a treat to get a letter in the mail. :D

[amyco]

:iagree:I also didn't like how their privacy policy kept changing.

 

 

Yes, and just this morning I read how users with yahoo or gmail emails now have them show up on facebook as @facebook.com instead of @gmail.com. Yikes.

[Georgiana Daniels]

I did.....but then 2 years later I got back on, so I'm probably not the best one to talk you into it.

 

At the time, it was the right decision for me. There were many people I really didn't want to be connected with, and especially the ones who'd post inappropriate things on my wall. But, I got over it and realized that the problem was my sensitivity.

 

You have to do what's right for you. If you're already feeling the creep factor, or needing a break, go for it! You might want to make a general status update to let people know you are taking a FB hiatus so they don't think you unfriended just them. If I'd done that it would have saved me tons of grief.

[Guest]

I did. I deleted it and didn't tell any one so every one thought I defriended them. Sad.

 

The reasons were I was getting annoyed.

There were people I liked IRL, but then I would see their posts and start not liking them.

Or I would feel left out if I was invited to events.

Then I started feeling like a stalker or peeping-tom whenever I read other people's posts. It was just creepy.

Oh and of course the drama. Oh my the drama! I had friends on two ends of the spectrum of whatever issue and they would bicker on my wall. Ridiculous.

 

So I deactivated my account. At first I went through withdrawals, so I deleted the beast (I think it takes 10 days). After that, I was so happy and relieved.

 

HOWEVER, after being gone for over a year, I wound up having to come back :chillpill:just to email certain people that don't have regular email. But then other people started befriending me and now I'm getting to the same place I was before I deleted the account. :glare:

 

I deleted mine in January for these reasons. I did create a new account where I ONLY friended my two sisters, who live out of state. I liked having friends from here (WTM) and I liked having friends/family that I have moved away from. I did not, however, like being friends with people I see on a regular basis. That is where the above really came into play for me.

[Candid]

There's a website that will do it for you and make sure it is all and really done:

http://suicidemachine.org/

[shanvan]

I don't use mine, except to see team pictures from our lacrosse games (posted to the team FB page by the coach's wife). It's absurd, really, because we take thousands of pictures (literally) every time they play. I really should just delete.

 

I don't use it for the same reasons mentioned:

• I don't care to know what you've eaten for breakfast and/or the gps location of your bowl.
  
• I don't care to be invited, along with 800 other friends, to every in-person and virtual sale party you and everyone else you've ever met have.
  
• I really don't have space in my life for passive-aggressive, whether it is:
  -- barely veiled complaints about "some people",
  -- how awesome your husband/child/friend/whoever is (and, by implied comparison, the rest of the world is not),
  -- how you don't complain (except please express sympathy for this train wreck du jour), or
  -- any other thing you're saying but not saying
  
• Nor do I have space for your 16,000 computer game performance updates, the article that 3,000,000 other people have also shared, or your religious/political rants and forwards (even if I actually agree)
  

 

In a nutshell, I have grown weary of the cultural narcissism.

 

I think my husband and kids (and friends) are pretty awesome. I tell them. To their faces. Often. Sometimes, I even just randomly text my husband while he's at work, to tell him I love him. Because I do. Sometimes, I text him at work to point out that he left an inconvenient mess or forgot something or whatever. Because he did. I don't think anyone else needs to be a part of any of those exchanges. It's creepy that such earth-shattering things like "where the he!! did you hide the can opener?" or "love you, honey! " , along with its response, could be "liked" by hundreds of people.

I talk politics/religion/life with my friends. Sometimes it's quite passionate, but it's always civil, and nobody drops a convenient blurb that supports/justifies their position and then disappears without bothering to engage commentary.

If I read something I think will be interesting to friends, I may share it in Google Reader or just email the link. My friends do the same. No need to share with hundreds when two friends share a similar interest, kwim?

 

And there you have it. Way too many words to express my for Facebook.

 

Where's the WTM 'like' button? :iagree::iagree::iagree:--that's as close as I can get. BTW, your post gave me quite a chuckle.

Edited June 27, 2012 by shanvan

[mommybee]

Yes, and just this morning I read how users with yahoo or gmail emails now have them show up on facebook as @facebook.com instead of @gmail.com. Yikes.

 

Facebook gave us all email addresses with @facebook a while ago. So they just put those as the primary now instead of your gmail or yahoo. They didn't actually change any addresses, they just want theirs as the default.

 

I'm really getting pretty sick of FB for all the reasons mentioned in this thread but for now I don't plan on deleting it. I am trying to check it less.

 

I deactivated once and my family just freaked out! I can't believe how attached they are to it and they just bugged and bugged me and couldn't understand me at all. So for now I keep it around for the many family I have.

[Liz CA]

There's a website that will do it for you and make sure it is all and really done:

http://suicidemachine.org/

 

Hilarious! :D

[TravelingChris]

I am on facebook because some of the groups my kids or I am in do their announcements that way. That said, I hardly go on at all. I don't think I go on more than once a week and then for a few minutes. Since I am not going on and not following anything really at all, it doesn't bother me at all.

[PrincessMommy]

I think all the reasons I deleted my account have already been mentioned.

[Mrs.Gregg]

It's something I've thought about doing and almost did 2yrs ago but...

 

*We moved 5 hours away from where we had lived for 10yrs and it's a quick way to stay intouch.

 

*We moved and I was making new friends in our new town and a lot of the homeschooling mothers I know here use it as a quick communication for playdates, park meetups. It's been an invaluable tool to know our new town.

 

*Around 2 yrs ago my mom joined FB she lives 3000 miles away and she connects with me and the kids through pictures, along with skype.

 

*My MIL joined FB, she lives 4 hours away and connects with the kids via FB and Skype.

 

* My 4 siblings and I are spread out over 4 states and we connect via FB.

 

*More people than not in my IRL use it instead of email.

 

~ I've hidden from my feed a lot of old classmates, I haven't deleted them.

 

~ I control who sees what on my feed, most of the time. Family, Homeschoolers, IRL close friends, Siblings etc.

 

~ I don't play games like farmville.

[sparrow]

I am on facebook because some of the groups my kids or I am in do their announcements that way. That said, I hardly go on at all. I don't think I go on more than once a week and then for a few minutes. Since I am not going on and not following anything really at all, it doesn't bother me at all.

 

:iagree:Same here. I check in everyday, but it doesn't eat my time (like this board :rolleyes:).

 

If FB affected my mood negatively, as it sounds is happening with you, I would definitely bail. It's not worth stress! Delete that baby.

[ocelotmom]

You might want to make a general status update to let people know you are taking a FB hiatus so they don't think you unfriended just them. If I'd done that it would have saved me tons of grief.

 

Agreed. And then make sure you leave it for a day or two so that people have a chance to see, don't post and then immediately delete, or presumably the post will be deleted along with it :)

[Tap]

I deactivate and reactivate my account all the time.

 

I have an essentially blank page. I only use it for checking in on friends during important times. A pending baby, job changes etc.

[happygrrl]

I can't take it anymore!

What does "jawm" mean???? :bigear:

[Mo_Babee]

I can't take it anymore!

What does "jawm" mean???? :bigear:

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

Yeah...this.

[Myeightkiddies]

I can't take it anymore!

What does "jawm" mean???? :bigear:

 

Just Agree With Me.

[Sukale]

I kept my account opened, but I did unfriend all but 14 people. I have everything set as private as I can get it. I live in SC and my family is in WV. I post a lot more now because it is only people like my sisters and a few very close friends that read my posts.

[curlylocks]

I deleted it because I decided it was a big invasion of privacy...

 

Also I am bugged by the financial side of it...does no one wonder why Facebook is free? According to Nick Carr of the RoughType blog, its users are all digital sharecroppers for Facebook. Facebook makes money by selling your data--whatever you "like" or click on, even your school info, anything--is little data mined and sold. That is how they make money, and that is why it does not "cost" the user anything. I'm not willing to pay that free cost. Many are willing which is why it thrives.

 

:iagree:

 

I also didn't like how their privacy policy kept changing.

 

:iagree:

[happygrrl]

Just Agree With Me.

 

 

Thank you! It was seriously driving me crazy!

[shanvan]

Thank you! It was seriously driving me crazy!

 

Sorry. I just recently learned what it means and I think I might have been showing off,:lol: which is ridiculous since there are many abbreviations (is that what you call them) I don't have a clue about. JAWM seems like such a practical way to give everyone a heads up on your intentions witht he thread. I wish I knew about it sooner.

[Pamela H in Texas]

My friend says I'm facebook bipolar because I've deleted the account twice and defriended almost everyone another time.

 

Currently, I have a fake fb page...well, I guess it is a real page. It has a made up (obviously made up, not a pen name or whatever) name (think PandaPeekaBoo, for example). I don't have anyone friended and I think I only have BeachBody "liked." Oh, maybe homeschool buyers co-op too. I have it only to keep semi open communication with my children's birth family (grandmother, aunt, etc).

 

Mostly? I don't need game invites. I don't care about political stuff (only one govt worth supporting imo). Well and really I just didn't find much on there worth the time.

Edited June 27, 2012 by 2J5M9K

[Coffeetime]

When people annoy me, I just unsubscribe from them in my news feed so I don't have to see their crap. ;)

 

One in particular that I just hid is essentially using FB as the modern day equivalent to the Pharisee who prayed loudly on the street corner so everyone could see his holiness. Posting your prayers on FB? Really? I'm pretty sure God doesn't have a FB account...

[Scarlett]

It is easy to control whose posts you see. You can set it so they are completely hidden (I have done this to people who rant constantly) or you can see "most posts" or "only important posts".

 

I like being in touch with relatives and friends who live far away. I like seeing photos of their kids, etc.

 

BUT...there is life outside of Facebook! Go ahead and delete it if that is what you want to do. I've considered it myself, but instead I adjusted my settings.

 

:iagree:

 

I adjust my settings so that I am not annoyed.

[shanvan]

:iagree:

 

I adjust my settings so that I am not annoyed.

 

Well, maybe I'll have to try that. One of the habitually annoying posters is a church friend, so I'm wondering how that will work. She may be able to figure out I am ignoring her.

[BigMamaBird]

:iagree:

 

I adjust my settings so that I am not annoyed.

 

Many, many of my family members are on ignore. I love them, but sometimes it's better to know less about people.

[justLisa]

I don't know why it is so annoying to people. Do you get the daily feed or something? Because otherwise you have to actually click on people's page. SO just don't do that. :confused:

 

The only reason I have facebook is I have some relatives that use it, and I have a good friend out of state and she uses it like a blog. I rarely ever log on.

[shanvan]

I don't know why it is so annoying to people. Do you get the daily feed or something? Because otherwise you have to actually click on people's page. SO just don't do that. :confused:

 

The only reason I have facebook is I have some relatives that use it, and I have a good friend out of state and she uses it like a blog. I rarely ever log on.

 

No, I go on when someone IRL asks me if I have seen their posts. When I check my home page I find all of the above mentioned annoying (to me) posts. And as others have mentioned I am losing respect for several people I know IRL.

[justLisa]

No, I go on when someone IRL asks me if I have seen their posts. When I check my home page I find all of the above mentioned annoying (to me) posts. And as others have mentioned I am losing respect for several people I know IRL.

 

 

Ooooh, see I don't have enough FB "friends." I have never had anyone ask me if I saw their post on FB. I guess I don't find it annoying becasue I don't really use it.

[Runnermom]

I'm still new here... What does 'jawm' stand for? :confused:

[Scarlett]

When people annoy me, I just unsubscribe from them in my news feed so I don't have to see their crap. ;)

 

One in particular that I just hid is essentially using FB as the modern day equivalent to the Pharisee who prayed loudly on the street corner so everyone could see his holiness. Posting your prayers on FB? Really? I'm pretty sure God doesn't have a FB account...

 

LOL. This made me laugh.

[Scarlett]

I'm still new here... What does 'jawm' stand for? :confused:

 

Just Agree With Me.

[Parrothead]

I wasn't doing anything but playing the games. My IRL friends I talked to and texted every day. They aren't on FB either. It was just a useless time waster for me.

 

And now I'm annoyed by what a previous posted termed "cultural narcissism" I see all around me. It is getting difficult to have a real conversation with people. It seems for some people everything is a status update.

 

I'll be glad when the rest of the world gets tired of FB. I hope it is just an anomaly. Like the 70s were.