Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 I noticed Wolf was upset this am. He clung to the kids a little tight, and was just...off. He reads the news online, and anytime there's a story involving a child, he gets upset. I found out what it was. Little boy with multiple sclerosis. Needed a walker to get around. His father went in to wake him for the first day of grade six. His son had committed suicide...he couldn't face any more bullying. If you could pray for this father...he'd lost his first wife 3 yrs ago to cancer, and now his child to suicide brought on by torment from fellow students, and being subponaed to testify against one that mugged and assaulted him. I just can't imagine. Wolf told me he was in tears reading the story this am, and now I am, having read it now. Story: http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2011/09/23/18727756.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatCyndiGirl Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 OMG. :grouphug: What a horrible thing to happen! That poor child, that poor father. Hug your babies tighter, inDEED! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 I can't bear to read it. Many prayers to the father though. I have no words to describe how I feel about bullies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 I don't know that I can word this quite right, but... I was relieved to read that the father was remarried and that his wife brought children to the marriage. I simply cannot imagine how much worse it would be for him if he were alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 Notice the part that the bully charged with mugging and assault will likely have the case dropped b/c the victim is no longer able to identify him in court? :mad: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funschooler5 Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Wow, that article was heartbreaking. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Ugh. This is so painful. I can't read it. Will pray for the dad and the parents of the bully-- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Notice the part that the bully charged with mugging and assault will likely have the case dropped b/c the victim is no longer able to identify him in court? :mad: If anything, I think the charges should be increased from mugging and assault to manslaughter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laundrycrisis Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 If the young offender is being protected by privacy laws and the charges against him are going to be dropped, with no further legal recourse against him, in the dad's shoes I would scrap that and go for broke and publicize his identity and what he caused far and wide, regardless of any consequences to myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 If the young offender is being protected by privacy laws and the charges against him are going to be dropped, with no further legal recourse against him, in the dad's shoes I would scrap that and go for broke and publicize his identity and what he caused far and wide, regardless of any consequences to myself. No news would touch that. The bully doesn't need to profit from suing everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashfern Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 :crying: So tragic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulieH Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 how horrific! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mynyel Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Notice the part that the bully charged with mugging and assault will likely have the case dropped b/c the victim is no longer able to identify him in court? :mad: :angry::banghead: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LNC Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 I would hope there could be charges filed against the principal who assigned an 8th grade "protector" for a bullied disabled student. The other student should have been suspended or expelled. And his friends should have been as well if they tried anything. Many schools have "no touching" policies. Zero tolerance for violent bullies... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 I would hope there could be charges filed against the principal who assigned an 8th grade "protector" for a bullied disabled student. The other student should have been suspended or expelled. And his friends should have been as well if they tried anything. Many schools have "no touching" policies. Zero tolerance for violent bullies... Yeah, I'd love to know how assigning another child to bodyguard was deemed reasonable. Why not suspend the little jerks? According to the article, the friends of the charged kid followed him home, bullied him, etc. It was b/c of them that the 'bodyguard' was assigned :glare: And what about the orig bully violating the restraining order at least twice? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laundrycrisis Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 No news would touch that. The bully doesn't need to profit from suing everyone. Paper the town with flyers with his name, picture, and results of his actions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Oh my Gosh! No words. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 The whole thing hits way too close to home for me. DS is horribly bullied. We have done the court thing, we have faced the retalitation from friend's of the bully. My son planned his suicide at age 7. It is the reason we started homeschooling. I have shared the story of this boy with my kids (I didn't give all details of course), I wanted them to know a) their actions towards another have far further consequences than just in that moment and b) that there is always another way. They don't have to die to be safe. The bit about the little punk getting off really sets my blood boiling. I agree with joannqn that it should be upped to manslaughter but they would never do that. Even if they tried the defense attorney would spin it to be the boy killed himself due to his disability and the bully had nothing to do with it. The whole situation it heartbreaking. The boy used a plastic bag, he had to have suffered so much in that way of dieing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 Paper the town with flyers with his name, picture, and results of his actions. And the Dad could end up losing his home, etc from being sued. As tempting as the idea is, I just don't see how the father paying more would benefit anyone. Although, Pickering just isn't that big. Chances are, the locals already know who this kid is. I know when a teen at the high school was charged with assaulting a 6 mth old, the foot ball players beat the living snot out of him outside the school. Small town, everyone knew who it was, knew the family of the baby, etc, no matter that there was a publication ban. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frontier Mom Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 :( This saddens me and pisses me off all at the same time. Bullys suck. :iagree: I hope the thief lives in the torment that he placed this boy in to the point that he felt suicide was his only option. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
speedmom4 Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 My heart breaks for this family. My son has Cerebral Palsy and is about the same age as the young boy in the article. I cannot begin to imagine the pain this poor father is feeling. I decided to homeschool my children when ds was diagnosed at 6 months old. He is now 12. I can't imagine the bullying he might have faced if he attended a traditional school. How are parents supposed to protect their children? Not every family is in a position where they can homeschool. My heart breaks every time I hear about a child who is bullied but especially when it is a special needs child. I'm so angry that the victim pays the ultimate price while the offender gets off scott free. Elise in NC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meggie Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 I can't read the story, so I don't know all the details beyond what you've posted. But I am so sick to my stomach thinking about it. Just no words. And maybe some people will tell me I'm arrogant for homeschooling or tell me I need to put my kids into PS because I have some obligation to help fix the system, but I don't give a d*mn. My kids will be safe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laundrycrisis Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 (edited) I would no longer care about what I stood to lose. I would feel I had everything to gain. If the courts protect him and his friends, but there was no protection for my son....yeah. In the comments to the article, someone has suggested a civil suit against the school and the boy's parents, well publicized. Edited September 23, 2011 by laundrycrisis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommymilkies Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 If the young offender is being protected by privacy laws and the charges against him are going to be dropped, with no further legal recourse against him, in the dad's shoes I would scrap that and go for broke and publicize his identity and what he caused far and wide, regardless of any consequences to myself. :iagree: My sincerest condolences to the family. One of the reasons we hs is because my dd was bullied. I was bullied horribly in school, too. Nobody deserves that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trresh Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 (edited) Horrible. Just sickening. I can't understand why his father continued to send him to school. Was he not aware that the bullying continued after the initial attack? Considering the kid had been appointed a protector, I assume the father knew. Edited September 23, 2011 by Trresh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Horrible. Just sickening. I can't understand why his father continued to send him to school. Was he not aware that the bullying continued after the initial attack? Considering the kid has been appointed a protector, I assume the father knew. You know what. I know families who have been through this and they don't feel they have any recourse. They've been duped into believing they can't or shouldn't homeschool their children. Actually, for a single parent, it is crazy difficult anyway. Here in the U.S. there are states in which it would be illegal for a step-parent to homeschool a step-child because they do not actally possess legal custody. That leaves private school. If you can afford one, that's great. But, at $5000.00-10,000.00 a year if there are openings (not always available) that isn't always an option. I can tell you that here in Michigan, bullying is not an excuse to be out of school. The truancy officer will beat a path to the parent's door and will not care what that child has been through. At six excused absences per year maximum, that's not much in wiggle room. Truly, the system makes a lot of people feel as though they have NO options. Even if they do actually have them, they don't see it because the system is determined to prevent them from using them. The PS in our area is AMAZING at setting up smoke and mirrors and the local school superintendent will lie through his weasel face and make up all kinds of untrue crap to make sure a parent does not feel like they can un-enroll their child. One of their favorite methods is that when a student transfers out of the district to the local little private school, they refuse to release the records and especially if this is a high schooler. Short of the parents paying for a lawyer - many of them are hard pressed to come up with a couple month's tuition much less a $1500.00 retainer - nothing can be done about it even though it is an illegal action. So the school takes the student's word for what credits had been completed, etc. Additionally, both the Department of Families and the special ed teachers lie and tell parents that children of disabilities can NOT be legally homeschooled. Many parents assume this is true because after all, social workers and special ed teachers would know. Trained to take the advice of "experts". This dad lost his wife to cancer three years ago. Grief can make one feel powerless. Though it is somewhat tempting to wonder why he let his child go to school day after day, I can't go there. I can't pretend to understand what he was up against. I don't know about Canadian law. In America, it is very likely the dad could win a civil lawsuit against the family of the boy and the school administrators themselves. One only need the preponderance of evidence which is not guilty beyond reasonable doubt. So, much of the necessary evidence could be gleaned simply from school records and parent communications. Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TXBeth Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 I don't know about Canadian law. In America, it is very likely the dad could win a civil lawsuit against the family of the boy and the school administrators themselves. One only need the preponderance of evidence which is not guilty beyond reasonable doubt. So, much of the necessary evidence could be gleaned simply from school records and parent communications. Faith True that the burden of proof is only preponderance of the evidence. However, I believe it is very difficult, if not unheard of, to win a wrongful death suit in a case of suicide, unless the person being sued had custody of the victim and knew of the possibility of suicide and failed to prevent it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkInTheBlue Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 A personal friend of ours who lives in Texas is taking their son to the dr today to rebreak his collar bone because it isn't healing correctly. Want to know how his broke his collar bone? I bully that's been picking on him for a while punched him again and broke a bone this time. Great, just great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3peasinWa Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 with this boy's special needs, he should've been given an personal asst with him at all times. That is not at all unusual to get, even in Canada afaik. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 with this boy's special needs, he should've been given an personal asst with him at all times. That is not at all unusual to get, even in Canada afaik. It's not unusual to get but many schools outright refuse to hire them. Both of my ds's are supposed to have a full time aide/assistant if they are in school, The school for my oldest said they were not hiring any for teh comin year at all, the other school not only were not hiring new ones, but let 2 go and instead had 1 aide for 5 kids. Getting services for a special needs kid in ps is an uphill battle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TXBeth Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 A personal friend of ours who lives in Texas is taking their son to the dr today to rebreak his collar bone because it isn't healing correctly. Want to know how his broke his collar bone? I bully that's been picking on him for a while punched him again and broke a bone this time. Great, just great. Now THAT you could win a lawsuit for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momdm Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 This is so sad. I am glad they passed anti-bullying law in school for the state of NJ. home more states do the same and increase the awareness for anti-bullying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 It's not unusual to get but many schools outright refuse to hire them. Both of my ds's are supposed to have a full time aide/assistant if they are in school, The school for my oldest said they were not hiring any for teh comin year at all, the other school not only were not hiring new ones, but let 2 go and instead had 1 aide for 5 kids. Getting services for a special needs kid in ps is an uphill battle. Though you live in Canada, I am just certain the Twilight Zone has transported you to my school district! Nearly every special ed aide for middle school was fired. But, you'll be happy to note that the sport's department got a 20% increase! GRRRRRRR........GRRRRRR...... I better stop spouting. I might go running for the rum! Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkInTheBlue Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Now THAT you could win a lawsuit for. I don't what they've decided yet but I hope they do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 What is WRONG with people??? God, that poor father. My heart breaks for him. :crying: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trresh Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Nearly every special ed aide for middle school was fired. But, you'll be happy to note that the sport's department got a 20% increase! That makes me physically ill. It's all about money. Screw the individual and worship the almighty dollar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i.love.lucy Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 And the Dad could end up losing his home, etc from being sued. As tempting as the idea is, I just don't see how the father paying more would benefit anyone. Although, Pickering just isn't that big. Chances are, the locals already know who this kid is. I know when a teen at the high school was charged with assaulting a 6 mth old, the foot ball players beat the living snot out of him outside the school. Small town, everyone knew who it was, knew the family of the baby, etc, no matter that there was a publication ban. This is just a heartbreaking story. What I wonder about is the psyche of the boys to go after a kid who assaulted a baby, but how bullying is overlooked. This kid could no more defend himself. I'm not saying he was as defenseless as a baby or in any way trying to equate the two lives, but I am just so blown away by how bullying is tolerated or overlooked. The authorities in the school should have been able to guard that child's safety and wellbeing during his school day. Where are the football players to go beat the crap out of a kid who assaults and bullies a disabled kid? I guess then the violence comes full circle though, doesn't it. I am just so, so sad over reading this. I have an 11 year old. I can not imagine this father's pain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 This is just a heartbreaking story. What I wonder about is the psyche of the boys to go after a kid who assaulted a baby, but how bullying is overlooked. This kid could no more defend himself. I'm not saying he was as defenseless as a baby or in any way trying to equate the two lives, but I am just so blown away by how bullying is tolerated or overlooked. The authorities in the school should have been able to guard that child's safety and wellbeing during his school day. Where are the football players to go beat the crap out of a kid who assaults and bullies a disabled kid? I guess then the violence comes full circle though, doesn't it. I am just so, so sad over reading this. I have an 11 year old. I can not imagine this father's pain. I'm not saying what the football players did was right or wrong...although I knew the baby's family, and do know that the father of the baby girl thanked them each personally afterwards. I'm just saying in smaller areas, secrets are impossible, and things do have a way of coming out...and there will be those that take it upon themselves to mete out the 'justice' that they think isn't going to happen, esp if this kid walks out of court, scot free, since they're saying without the boy's testimony, he'll get off. Just saying that there may not be a need for the family to publicize anything...at least not beyond the grapevine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoVanGogh Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 We had a very young (2nd or 3rd grade) boy in our school district commit suicide last year over bullying. His family is still on my mind daily, as I can't imagine the grief they are going through. Oh, to be able to take back time and get a redo, to take those precious children out of those school environments with the knowledge of hindsight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 That poor boy and his dad. My goodness, it really is hard to believe schools continue to deny the damage and coddle the bullies. It's heartbreaking, and I wish a parent could sue the schools. Responsibility, accountability and dollars out might make them see the reality they continue to deny. They are responsible, they are can stop it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted September 23, 2011 Author Share Posted September 23, 2011 That poor boy and his dad. My goodness, it really is hard to believe schools continue to deny the damage and coddle the bullies. It's heartbreaking, and I wish a parent could sue the schools. Responsibility, accountability and dollars out might make them see the reality they continue to deny. They are responsible, they are can stop it. Problem is, a lawyer would say it was b/c of the child's disability that caused his depression and suicide. Too easy a spin for a clear cut case. That being said, the boy was bubbly and outgoing until the mugging. Of course, proving that...*sigh* I'd love to know how it is that the mugger violated the restraining order at least twice. Where are the adults in HIS life? And what about the adults in his friend's lives, who continued to bully and harrass this poor child? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgehog Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 I'm not saying what the football players did was right or wrong...although I knew the baby's family, and do know that the father of the baby girl thanked them each personally afterwards. I'm just saying in smaller areas, secrets are impossible, and things do have a way of coming out...and there will be those that take it upon themselves to mete out the 'justice' that they think isn't going to happen, esp if this kid walks out of court, scot free, since they're saying without the boy's testimony, he'll get off. Just saying that there may not be a need for the family to publicize anything...at least not beyond the grapevine. I sure hope so. "The village" has it's uses at times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celticmom Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Paper the town with flyers with his name, picture, and results of his actions. Or better yet the town and the internet. It could follow him a long time on the net. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxbridgeacademy Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Another reason why I homeschool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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