Do you resent people or have a lack of respect for people based on how they look?

[Hoggirl]

Okay, I suppose I am in instigator. :D My initial thread on maintaining appearance has seemed to attract quite a bit of attention.

 

Does someone's appearance factor into how you feel about them? Perhaps this is more of something that occurs at an initial meeting or is based on first impressions. So, maybe the question should be whether or not you have a bias toward or against a person based on how he/she looks????

 

Such strong opinions have come out on the issue of appearance, maintaining appearance, etc. Some have said they feel like people look down on them if they do not do all the grooming/dressing/adorning as others. If you are one who does not emphasize appearance, do you feel like people do not respect you because of this? Or do you feel like they *do* respect you because you don't spend time on such things.

 

If you are one who does emphasize appearance, do you feel like people resent you for it? Or do you feel like you garner more respect because you *do* focus on grooming/dressing/adorning, etc?

[Crimson Wife]

I try not to because it's not Christian, but it's something I really have to work on. I shouldn't be more critical of a fat person eating junk food than a thin person eating the same thing (unhealthy food is unhealthy food regardless of who's eating it), but my visceral reaction is to be more judgmental of the heavier consumer.

[Parrothead]

First impressions.

 

 

 

Yes, I'm guilty.

[amy g.]

I never even introduced myself to the new mom at swim team with the fake nails, fake teeth and fake b@@bs.

 

She might be an interesting person, and a great friend, but I'll never know because I really am just that judgmental.

[LidiyaDawn]

Okay, I suppose I am in instigator. :D My initial thread on maintaining appearance has seemed to attract quite a bit of attention.

 

Does someone's appearance factor into how you feel about them? Perhaps this is more of something that occurs at an initial meeting or is based on first impressions. So, maybe the question should be whether or not you have a bias toward or against a person based on how he/she looks????

 

Such strong opinions have come out on the issue of appearance, maintaining appearance, etc. Some have said they feel like people look down on them if they do not do all the grooming/dressing/adorning as others. If you are one who does not emphasize appearance, do you feel like people do not respect you because of this? Or do you feel like they *do* respect you because you don't spend time on such things.

 

If you are one who does emphasize appearance, do you feel like people resent you for it? Or do you feel like you garner more respect because you *do* focus on grooming/dressing/adorning, etc?

 

I don't care how other people look… and I don't care what other people think about how I look.

 

I'm starting to think I'm weird because I don't understand the fixation with appearances. :confused:

[Natalieclare]

I don't care how other people look… and I don't care what other people think about how I look.

 

I'm starting to think I'm weird because I don't understand the fixation with appearances. :confused:

 

I am just gonna follow you around and say, :iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

 

Although, if I dig deep, I will confess to being slightly prejudiced against the suit as opposed to the slob.

[Janie Grace]

I never even introduced myself to the new mom at swim team with the fake nails, fake teeth and fake b@@bs.

 

 

She has fake TEETH? Like, dentures?

 

Of course I'm influenced by how someone looks. I don't think it's possible not to be, to an extent. We can choose not to relate to someone according to that first impression, but I think it's hard-wired that what we see informs our minds about people we encounter.

 

I probably have the warmest reaction (on that gut level) to people who are about where I am on the scale. Care enough to match, not look messy, fix your hair, wear a little make-up... but not "too" much. Because I'm just that self-centered, I suppose.

[QueenCat]

Sort of... not so much based on clothes or hairstyles or jewelry... but cleanliness, body odor, basic grooming, yes....

[Parrothead]

More info.

 

Okay, I suppose I am in instigator. :D My initial thread on maintaining appearance has seemed to attract quite a bit of attention.

There are other ways of gaining attention from the board. LOL:lol::lol:

 

Does someone's appearance factor into how you feel about them?

Again, first impressions. They say a lot to me. I don't know how the kid who was walking in front of me with his waistband around his butt cheeks wanted to appear. What he was saying to me was that he was desperate for someone to accidentally bump his breeches so they fell to his ankles.

Of course, I didn't do that, but I did think about it.

 

Perhaps this is more of something that occurs at an initial meeting or is based on first impressions. So, maybe the question should be whether or not you have a bias toward or against a person based on how he/she looks????

I can honestly say I do. Probably more often than not. I won't let dd walk two blocks to dance lessons because of the apartments on the way which appear to be full of dope heads hanging out that she would have to pass. The chick with the "trampy" look will get an unflattering thought. And so on.

Such strong opinions have come out on the issue of appearance, maintaining appearance, etc. Some have said they feel like people look down on them if they do not do all the grooming/dressing/adorning as others. If you are one who does not emphasize appearance, do you feel like people do not respect you because of this? Or do you feel like they *do* respect you because you don't spend time on such things.

N/A

 

If you are one who does emphasize appearance, do you feel like people resent you for it? I didn't until I read some of the replies in the other thread.

 

Or do you feel like you garner more respect because you *do* focus on grooming/dressing/adorning, etc?

Depends on the situation. There truly is a "Pretty Woman" type attitude from sales people/wait staff/etc. I'd prefer not to encounter it. I don't need have time or energy to dress down or shabbily or frumpy just so I can astonish the sales lady when I pull out the black AmEx card. (Which I truly don't have.)

 

Also I don't dress for anyone's pleasure but my own. I enjoy wearing classic styles are flattering. I enjoy wearing make up. I enjoy doing my hair. I really really enjoy my earrings.

[amy g.]

Okay, maybe her teeth weren't fake, but the white glow off of them sure was.

[CarenM]

I am just gonna follow you around and say, :iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

 

Although, if I dig deep, I will confess to being slightly prejudiced against the suit as opposed to the slob.

 

Yep :iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:

[Jenny in Florida]

I guess I don't think about it much, honestly. I truly do have other things on my mind most of the time.

 

I assume that other people make judgements about me based on how I look. I'm 46 and a good 40 pounds overweight. I don't dress as well as I could afford to do, because it bothers me to spend money on things I consider frivolous. I'm sure salespeople don't think I'm serious when I go looking at nice, new cars, for example.

 

I also don't care. And I'd prefer not to do business with a salesperson or store who dismissed me based on my appearance, anyway.

 

For example, when I was shopping for a car this most recent time, I took my son with me to the Toyota dealership. We could barely get anyone to so much as talk to us, and the salesperson couldn't be bothered to do more than walk us out to the car I was interested in and unlock the doors. He then stood there and checked messages on his phone.

 

Needless to say, we left. I followed up with a nasty e-mail to the sales manager. Then, we went to the VW dealership, where we were treated courteously and respectfully.

 

Guess where I bought my car?

 

It's kind of like my son always says about people who give him a hard time about dancing: Anyone who treats me badly because I don't wear make-up isn't someone whose opinion I care about, anyway.

 

As I said in another thread, I don't usually notice much about the appearance of someone I meet. I will admit that the polished mom with manicured nails and professionally coiffed hair is not the first person I'm likely to approach for a chat while I'm waiting for my kid at an audition, though. I don't look down my nose at her. I just sort of assume we're not likely to have a lot in common.

[Belacqua]

I try not to be judgmental (not always successfully, I'll grant), but I do admit that I'm biased against somebody who wears a blatantly obscene or almost-universally-considered-offensive tee shirt in public. It isn't that I'm clutching my pearls at the picture on your shirt, as I'm not personally all that bothered by such things, but it does tell me that you enjoy offending strangers just for your own amusement. And saying, "C'mon, it's FUNNY!" doesn't make me like you any better.

[creekland]

Does someone's appearance factor into how you feel about them?

 

Yes, and I think it's impossible not to since we are all human (written while I'm mulling many psych studies I read over the years in college and otherwise). Whether people ACT on their thoughts or not is a different question, but human brains instinctively make judgments. Mine definitely does, but I try not to act upon it - except when hiring decisions are being made. Then we have to think about our bottom line and clients. (Hubby is the owner of a Civil Engineering firm.)

 

Perhaps this is more of something that occurs at an initial meeting or is based on first impressions. So, maybe the question should be whether or not you have a bias toward or against a person based on how he/she looks????

 

Yes again. Studies have shown that people have biases even when they don't know they do. Google some of them. They make interesting reads. Hubby knows better than to wear a suit - ever - in his job. People tend to distrust men in suits, especially in rural areas.

 

Such strong opinions have come out on the issue of appearance, maintaining appearance, etc. Some have said they feel like people look down on them if they do not do all the grooming/dressing/adorning as others. If you are one who does not emphasize appearance, do you feel like people do not respect you because of this? Or do you feel like they *do* respect you because you don't spend time on such things.

 

I've found I get more respect everywhere except women's clothing stores. ;) And I don't want sales people fawning over me there. I need to buy nicer clothes for work (I work in our local public school) and I want to pick out what I like - not what they think I should wear. In any other store (hardware, grocery, etc) I feel I get the same or more respect. I don't shop in boutiques or craft stores.

 

Outside of shopping I've never felt like I had less respect. It may have been there, but it hasn't been noticeable. I don't wear make up to school and have never found that to be a problem. I teach in math/science classes mostly, so perhaps it's more expected/accepted in those fields? I have many friends of all income levels based on work, hubby's job, church, and our neighborhood. If anyone is shunning me, I sure don't know about it (nor care).

[Bang!Zoom!]

absolutely NOT

 

I'm old enough and have had my first impressions corrected enough to know this is a really stupid way to live.

 

It's just asking for trouble and deep humbling.

 

But if that's where you are in life, have at it.

[T'smom]

Only if it's really extreme one way or the other. Really extreme. For example, we have a teenage neighbor boy who has long greasy hair and is always chain-smoking outside in his boxers. I avoid him. Also, I may be intimidated by someone who looks really, really good.

 

I'm neat and clean, but I don't wear make-up or fix my hair. (I have been told my quite a few people that it looks like I flat-iron my hair every day. I so don't. I wash and go. I own a hair dryer, but I don't know where it is. My mil wanted to borrow hairspray when she visited one time and I had to laugh. Seriously? I haven't used hairspray since my wedding and the hairstylist did it!)

 

Sometimes I would like to put more attention into my clothes but I have NO IDEA what is "in style", so I tell myself 'okay, pay attention to what people are wearing at church/mom's group/etc' Then I get home and am like "dang, I totally forgot to pay attention!" So when I go to the store, I don't know what to buy. I'd rather buy books anyway!

 

I have a lot of fun dressing my kids though. Especially my 1 year old dd. I did notice at the park the other day that there were other parents who were dressed really nicely and their kids weren't. My kids have super-cute outfits, and I'm just wearing shorts/t-shirt/flip-flops.

[Hoggirl]

I've been trying to remember what product used the line, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." Was it L'oreal? What product was it??

[Janie Grace]

 

Sometimes I would like to put more attention into my clothes but I have NO IDEA what is "in style"' date=' so I tell myself 'okay, pay attention to what people are wearing at church/mom's group/etc' Then I get home and am like "dang, I totally forgot to pay attention!" So when I go to the store, I don't know what to buy. I'd rather buy books anyway![/quote']

 

Haha, you sound just like me! I just didn't get that noticing/caring about styles gene.

[Hoggirl]

absolutely NOT

 

I'm old enough and have had my first impressions corrected enough to know this is a really stupid way to live.

 

It's just asking for trouble and deep humbling.

 

But if that's where you are in life, have at it.

 

But, it's okay to label someone "stupid" if they are honest enough to admit that the are influenced by appearance in making first impressions?

[Guest]

I try not to judge based on appearance and have been quite successful. Maybe I only meet good-looking people. :D

[Guest]

absolutely NOT

 

I'm old enough and have had my first impressions corrected enough to know this is a really stupid way to live.

 

It's just asking for trouble and deep humbling.

 

But if that's where you are in life, have at it.

 

:iagree:

 

I've been wrong about people, before, so I know better. We were taught as children not to judge a book by it's cover, so I was raised not to.

[creekland]

I've been trying to remember what product used the line, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." Was it L'oreal? What product was it??

 

No clue. While I thoroughly enjoyed studying advertising as part of my Psych minor in college, I can't stand commercials and seldom see them (we tape and fast forward TV in our house). It would sound like some sort of beauty item aimed at women though.

 

Once one has studied advertising I'm convinced that they will never look at an advertisement the same way again. Actually, I think that's a good thing. I've tried to bring my boys up knowing the tricks/lures, etc.

[creekland]

But, it's okay to label someone "stupid" if they are honest enough to admit that the are influenced by appearance in making first impressions?

 

Don't worry, we "stupid" people who are honest and have studied the issue know what the studies show and trust those over what people say. ;)

 

It's EXTREMELY common for people to feel they aren't judgmental - more common than not. It's the way we're raised. It's part of our "knowledge" of right and wrong.

 

That said, people are perfectly correct stating that first impressions aren't a very good indicator of who a person is overall. But, when one is in a field where their economy depends on first impressions, bias needs to happen or one can easily go out of business trying to prove a point.

 

When choosing friends, 'tis best to look below the surface. My first impression of hubby was that he was a stuck up snob. :lol: Good thing he was infatuated with me or our marriage would never have happened and now he's the man of my dreams - 23 years AFTER our marriage (I've loved all the years, but he's still the man of my dreams).

[Jean in Newcastle]

I notice how people look. But it doesn't change my attitude towards them. Their character determines my attitude towards them.

 

I've worked with the homeless, juvenile delinquents (ie. kids in jail), the elderly (who often do not have the best hygiene), people with very low income etc. I've been introduced to strung-out drug addicts and working prostitutes. I've found warm loving people in these groups of people who often are not very pretty or pleasant to be around due to lack of basic grooming more than style. I've also found some pretty nasty people (personality and behavior wise) in these same groups. And I've found some people who just make me want to cry because of their choices.

 

I've worked for extremely rich people (some of them with names you would recognize). I've known secrets about them that their extremely rich friends would have shunned them for because for the most part appearances were extremely important. Again I found warm, loving people alongside some pretty nasty ones. And again, I've found some people who just make me want to cry because of their choices.

 

First impressions are only helpful within certain social stratas and situations. They might tell you how well that person copes within certain social expectations. They tell you nothing of that person's character.

Edited August 12, 2011 by Jean in Newcastle

[Bang!Zoom!]

Once you are made *aware* of something...once you are corrected...once you are educated or taught something...and then keep right on doing it..isn't that the definition of stupid?

[Julie Smith]

I've worked with the homeless, juvenile delinquents (ie. kids in jail), the elderly (who often do not have the best hygiene), people with very low income etc. I've been introduced to strung-out drug addicts and working prostitutes. I've found warm loving people in these groups of people who often are not very pretty or pleasant to be around due to lack of basic grooming more than style. I've also found some pretty nasty people (personality and behavior wise) in these same groups. And I've found some people who just make me want to cry because of their choices.

 

I've worked for extremely rich people (some of them with names you would recognize). I've known secrets about them that their extremely rich friends would have shunned them for because for the most part appearances were extremely important. Again I found warm, loving people alongside some pretty nasty ones. And again, I've found some people who just make me want to cry because of their choices.

 

Now I'm curious. What kind of work did you do?

 

(Mind you I likely wouldn't recognize the names of the famous people you worked for. But then again a couple of months ago I had to look up "Lady Gaga" because I never heard of her.)

[KristineinKS]

I do not place much emphasis on personal appearance and while I try to always look presentable when out in public, sometimes I've got too much else going on to even bother with that. I have a tendency to live in jeans, t-shirts, and Birkenstocks, and seldom do I wear makeup.

 

I never really thought much about it either way and generally pay no attention to how other people look/dress, however, we just moved from rural Kansas into a very upper-middle-class West Coast neighborhood and now I'm noticing how out of place I am. I would swear that I'm one of the only women in this neighborhood that does not go jogging or at least walking daily... Most everyone that I've seen is of the thin, long blond hair, well-dressed, clearly well-off variety, while I have short funky hair, prominent tattoos, and a few pounds to lose.

 

Do I judge my neighbors based on their appearance? Absolutely & I steer clear of them because, more than likely, they're judging me too. I have no desire to socialize with the type of person that I presume them to be and, household income aside, I doubt we'd have anything in common.

[creekland]

First impressions are only helpful within certain social stratas and situations. They might tell you how well that person copes within certain social expectations. They tell you nothing of that person's character.

 

This is a great way of putting it. I actually even think those who say they aren't judgmental are thinking solely of the deeper "getting to know the person" aspect.

 

But whenever a human sees anyone, they automatically put them in several categories mentally (even as simple as male/female). It's why/how we can describe people. Then they have to shift categories as they get to know them. Our categories do come with stereotypes based on what we have experienced (mostly) and been taught (secondary once one has enough experiences).

 

It's just the way humans are wired. It's not wrong.

[Hoggirl]

I never even introduced myself to the new mom at swim team with the fake nails, fake teeth and fake b@@bs.

 

She might be an interesting person, and a great friend, but I'll never know because I really am just that judgmental.

 

I appreciate your honesty.

 

I am definitely one to make judgments on initial appearance. Apparently, this makes me stupid. :D

[Bang!Zoom!]

I recently spent some time in No Cal.

 

My experience there was of a materialistic plastic society; the conversations at dinner in restaurants were just about all the same.

 

How much things cost and women of 70 years of age trying to appear 20.

 

Kinda a bummer, but it's the culture I guess.

 

But I must say...it did affect the dear one. He commented several times on how "put together" the women were there.

 

What a dingleberry.

[Pretty in Pink]

I'd like to say no, but I'm reminded of a situation a few weeks ago at my boys' tae kwon do class. There was a new mom there (new to me, at least, as I'd never seen her before). She was decked out in seriously short shorts, heels, and a flimsy, loose tank top with ridiculously large armholes. There was a *lot* of side boob/side boob tattoo action going on.

 

Yes, in my mind I judged her...not so favorably. So I guess her appearance did matter to me.

 

I couldn't care less whether another woman wears make-up or not or has a fashionable hairstyle. In my mind I might think that a woman looks tired or unfashionable or whatever though it wouldn't stop me from talking to them or being their friend.

 

Sometimes I am a bit intimidated by the mom's always look so perfectly put together (the perfectly highlighted hair, the fresh manicure, the high-end track suits and such) but that's because, in the back of my mind, I am wondering if they are judging me! I always seem to run into those moms on days that I am less than put together myself. :tongue_smilie:

[creekland]

Once you are made *aware* of something...once you are corrected...once you are educated or taught something...and then keep right on doing it..isn't that the definition of stupid?

 

Nope.

 

stu·pid

 

   /ˈstupɪd, ˈstyu‐/ Show Spelled [stoo-pid, styoo‐] Show IPA adjective, -er, -est, noun

–adjective

 

1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull.

 

2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question.

 

3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party.

 

But it would be stupid (in the foolish sense) to not consider first impressions when hiring for certain professions. ;)

 

It would also be stupid (in the foolish sense) to assume first impressions tell you everything about a person.

[Wheres Toto]

Only if it's really extreme one way or the other. Really extreme. For example' date=' we have a teenage neighbor boy who has long greasy hair and is always chain-smoking outside in his boxers. I avoid him. Also, I may be intimidated by someone who looks really, really good.

 

I'm neat and clean, but I don't wear make-up or fix my hair. (I have been told my quite a few people that it looks like I flat-iron my hair every day. I so don't. I wash and go. I own a hair dryer, but I don't know where it is. My mil wanted to borrow hairspray when she visited one time and I had to laugh. Seriously? I haven't used hairspray since my wedding and the hairstylist did it!)

 

Sometimes I would like to put more attention into my clothes but I have NO IDEA what is "in style", so I tell myself 'okay, pay attention to what people are wearing at church/mom's group/etc' Then I get home and am like "dang, I totally forgot to pay attention!" So when I go to the store, I don't know what to buy. I'd rather buy books anyway!

 

I have a lot of fun dressing my kids though. Especially my 1 year old dd. I did notice at the park the other day that there were other parents who were dressed really nicely and their kids weren't. My kids have super-cute outfits, and I'm just wearing shorts/t-shirt/flip-flops.[/quote']

 

Pretty much all of this. I really prefer buying cute clothes for my built like a model 17 year old or my cute as a button 4 year old, or even my picky, sensory issues son before trying to find something that works on my old, saggy, small on top/large on bottom, nothing ever looks right figure.

 

I avoid the really outrageous/trampy, stinky people and the overly made up/dressed up for the circumstances pretty equally. The overly done ones send me back to high school and avoiding the popular mean girls.

 

I am extremely introverted and approaching people is hard for me at the best of times. When I feel seriously intimidated and unlikely to be up to standards - it's pretty much impossible.

Edited August 12, 2011 by dottieanna29

[Bang!Zoom!]

I come from the woods, we call them folks stupid.

 

I rest my case. :)

[zenjenn]

To some extent, yes, but but I will approach someone, talk to them, and their words/demeanor *combined* with their appearance will crystallize into a judgment.

 

I am generally a very easy-going tolerant person. I have friends with high-maintenance appearances and those with low-maintenance appearances. I do not judge someone with fake nails/hair/teeth/boobs, but if I talk to them and within a few minutes get a fake personality to match, then I judge.

 

I don't think it is terribly difficult to intuit a personality type once you have a few minutes of interaction.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Now I'm curious. What kind of work did you do?

 

(Mind you I likely wouldn't recognize the names of the famous people you worked for. But then again a couple of months ago I had to look up "Lady Gaga" because I never heard of her.)

 

Three different things!

 

The homeless and elderly were part of a ministry that we had to a low income housing development that attracted people who didn't always live there. I often worked in a semi social worker capacity alongside actual social workers because the residents trusted me.

 

I've also been asked by churches to work with various people in crisis - sometimes as a court appointed guardian, and sometimes less formally.

 

I taught at a juvenile correction facility. So that was simply a job teaching.

 

The wealthy I worked for because I needed money! I've worked as a cook, housekeeper, nanny in various wealthy homes.

Edited August 12, 2011 by Jean in Newcastle

[sarawatsonim]

Nope, because you never know what a person's story is. You can really miss out on some extremely interesting people that way anyway.

[creekland]

I recently spent some time in No Cal.

 

My experience there was of a materialistic plastic society; the conversations at dinner in restaurants were just about all the same.

 

How much things cost and women of 70 years of age trying to appear 20.

 

Kinda a bummer, but it's the culture I guess.

 

But I must say...it did affect the dear one. He commented several times on how "put together" the women were there.

 

What a dingleberry.

 

Wait, YOU'RE judging people based on appearances and eavesdropping in restaurants at the same time you're telling the rest of us we're stupid if we admit to making mental judgments based on what we see?

 

Um...

[Margo out of lurking]

I notice how people look. But it doesn't change my attitude towards them. Their character determines my attitude towards them.

 

This. I've met gorgeous people who ended up unattractive once I got to know them. I've met unattractive people whose inner beauty came through.

 

On a slightly different subject, dh doesn't get that women most often dress up for other women. I don't care what any man thinks of me, but I want to feel comfortable around other women--to look nice--whether or not I know them. Not in a competitive way, but in a way that I don't feel like the old hag. :D

[creekland]

I am definitely one to make judgments on initial appearance. Apparently, this makes me stupid. :D

 

Not if you keep reading...

[Hoggirl]

I recently spent some time in No Cal.

 

My experience there was of a materialistic plastic society; the conversations at dinner in restaurants were just about all the same.

 

How much things cost and women of 70 years of age trying to appear 20.

 

Kinda a bummer, but it's the culture I guess.

 

But I must say...it did affect the dear one. He commented several times on how "put together" the women were there.

 

What a dingleberry.

 

Wasn't sure if the "dear one" referred to your husband or not. And, you did not like that he thought these women looked "put together"?

[Scarlett]

Okay, maybe her teeth weren't fake, but the white glow off of them sure was.

 

LOL

[Britomart]

I make preliminary judgments based on appearances. I think everyone does. I mean, I think appearance is a form of communication. One we sometimes have little control over (due to illness, exhaustion, economics, genetics, etc), but which we usually have some control over. And anyway, people are an amalgam of soul and body; it'd be silly to pretend they didn't have bodies and that their bodies didn't matter.

 

So it just makes sense to ask yourself, "What is this person trying to say - or saying without trying - by her appearance?"

 

But . . . it also makes sense to hold those first-impression judgments very lightly, because they'll almost certainly need to be adjusted - or even completely changed - when you get to know the person better. But when you're just starting to sketch your knowledge of a person, of course appearance is going to be part of the data stream you consider. I find it becomes less important the longer the acquaintance progresses though, because you have more and better sources of knowledge about the person.

[Crimson Wife]

I've been trying to remember what product used the line, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." Was it L'oreal? What product was it??

 

I thought it was Breck, but it turns out to be

.

[Janie Grace]

I make preliminary judgments based on appearances. I think everyone does. I mean, I think appearance is a form of communication. One we sometimes have little control over (due to illness, exhaustion, economics, genetics, etc), but which we usually have some control over. And anyway, people are an amalgam of soul and body; it'd be silly to pretend they didn't have bodies and that their bodies didn't matter.

 

So it just makes sense to ask yourself, "What is this person trying to say - or saying without trying - by her appearance?"

 

But . . . it also makes sense to hold those first-impression judgments very lightly, because they'll almost certainly need to be adjusted - or even completely changed - when you get to know the person better. But when you're just starting to sketch your knowledge of a person, of course appearance is going to be part of the data stream you consider. I find it becomes less important the longer the acquaintance progresses though, because you have more and better sources of knowledge about the person.

 

EXACTLY THIS. Well put.

[Scarlett]

I've been trying to remember what product used the line, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." Was it L'oreal? What product was it??

 

Yes L'Oreal. Remember Cybil Shepard spinning around in the chair saying, 'Some people say I'm attractive. I say I agree. After all, *I* had nothing to do with it. I owe that to my mother and father.'

 

Still cracks me up.

 

Edited to say I am wrong.....L'Oreal's was 'I'm worth it.'

[Hoggirl]

I thought it was Breck, but it turns out to be

.

 

Wow! That is some BIG hair! I kind of thought it looked better before the Pantene. :lol:

[twoforjoy]

Nope. There are all sorts of ways in which I'm judgmental and petty, but appearance isn't one of them. Most of the time I don't even notice somebody's appearance, much less judge them based on it.

[Hoggirl]

Wait, YOU'RE judging people based on appearances and eavesdropping in restaurants at the same time you're telling the rest of us we're stupid if we admit to making mental judgments based on what we see?

 

Um...

 

:D

[Crimson Wife]

Wow! That is some BIG hair! I kind of thought it looked better before the Pantene. :lol:

 

:lol::lol::lol::lol: I used to have big hair way back when but not *THAT* big, LOL!