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Is your bedroom on a different floor than your children's?


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So, we've finished signing the papers and can start getting in the house Wednesday (day after tomorrow). Yeah! Finally some room to turn around in.

 

I do have a concern that I can't shake and would love to hear from some of you who have found solutions or even some assurances. The master bedroom is on the first floor and the other 4 bedrooms are upstairs. I think about things like "what if they need me?", "what if there is a fire or other emergency?", "what about the 3 yr old in the middle of the night?", etc How do you handle the separation of space from you and your children. My main concerns are emergencies (fire) and the 3 yr old (who occasionally stumbles into our room in the middle of the night and we take him back to bed).

 

I'm thinking each child's window having one of those roll up ladders and instructions on getting the screens out and ladders out. Also, I'm thinking a monitor somewhere on that floor so if they really need us (the older guys) they can come to that and call. And of course, a monitor in the 3yr old's room with a gate at his door. I don't want him wandering the house and don't want to gate the stairs in case the other guys want to use them.

 

Help? I'm borderline irrational. :)

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My house is one story so obviously we are all on one level.

 

Several years ago we did a field trip to the Fire Dept and they recommended that all children on second floor each have own ladder in their room. They said that children as young as 3yrs have been able to use them to escape.

 

If that is your biggest fear, I would think ladders would be a good safety measure and maybe help ease your fears.

 

I hope you enjoy your new home, once all the anxiety of the moves wears off you will probably feel more comfortable.

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I don't have an answer for you but I can say I have the same issues. In our case, the boys are upstairs with us. However, my daughter is on the first floor alone. The only thing that helps me feel better about that is the fact we have a medium sized dog that barks when people approach our house.

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I don't think you are being irrational at all. We've been looking at new homes and one of our requirements is that the master bedroom be on the same floor as most of the other bedrooms. I have the same fears that you do. I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in those thoughts.

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Yes, and I *love* it.

 

But my house is small and I can easily hear if there's a disturbance upstairs. We moved in when dd was 2, and we've never used gates in this house...

 

But really, I love the semi-privacy that I have with the kids upstairs and our master bedroom on the main floor. It's one of the things that I wouldn't care to give up if we move...

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I live in a Cape Cod and I sleep on the first floor and my 2 children are on the second floor.

 

My kids were 3 and 5 when we moved in and there has never been a problem. They spend more time going in and out of each other's rooms then coming down to mine.

 

When they were very little I left a baby monitor in the hallway so I could hear them.

 

There are smoke detectors/carbon monoxide detectors outside their rooms (as there should be outside any bedrooms).

 

The bathroom light is on for them for extra light.

 

It has never been an issue for either of them or me.

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Hey Jessica!!

 

We have the same situation. When we moved in, my youngest was three. I worried at first but she had no problem getting down those steps and into my bed in the middle of the night. LOL.

 

I did keep a night light on the steps so they could see. Actually, this arrangement has worked really well as they have gotten older. The only thing I don't like is that my room is under the boys' bedroom and they walk like elephants. Otherwise, it just worked out OK for us.

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We had an intercom system installed in ours. Each bedroom has an intercom where the kids can speak to us in our bedroom or other rooms in the house. I can speak to them from the kitchen (Wake up, it's time for school!) or can contact them in case of an emergency (use the ladder and exit the home). It also has a monitoring feature where I can set it to listen to everything going on in the kids' rooms or playroom. I use this like a baby monitor for the 1 and 3 year olds, but the older two can have their privacy and only push their buttons and call me if they need anything. I can't remember the name of the manufacturer, but it was installed by the same company who installed our alarm system. I'll ask dh about it and if he has anything to add I'll post again.

 

We put a gate at the top of the stairs to keep the little ones safe at night. It has a walk-through feature that can be opened by the 11 and 9 year olds. I think of this as a safety measure as well. If they are awake enough to open it they are awake enough to walk down the stairs. Otherwise, they may stumble if they are too sleepy. I'm glad I didn't gate the little one's rooms because I sometimes find the 3 year old cuddled up with a big brother in the mornings!

 

Enjoy the new home!

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All bedrooms are on the second floor but I often sleep downstairs due to dh's snoring. I kept a monitor in the younger kids rooms until they were 4 or 5 (when ever they were old enough to go down the stairs to find me without being disoriented). We have stair lights so we left those on at night for a nightlight. This also helped the kids find their way down the stairs without having to turn on a bright hall light. In our old house, I had a rechargeable nightlight/flashlight plugged into the hallway plug-in so we had the same effect without the stair lights. I sleep light enough that I usually wake up if anyone gets out of bed in the night. If your dc sleep with their doors closed or even pulled closed enough that they have to move the door to get out, you may put a jingle bell on ds3's doorknob so if he opens the door in the middle of the night you have a distinct sound that will alert you.

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I wouldn't be comfortable gating his door. Is he potty-trained? What if he had to go to the bathroom and you didn't get there to let him out fast enough?

 

Duh! Thank you and of course! I have a wonderful gate with a door that I used on his room door when he started crawling. I'll put that at the top of the stairs until I'm more confident in his stair climbing abilities. :) The older boys would love him to crawl in their beds, I bet. I haven't thought about that. LOL

 

Hey Jessica!!

 

We have the same situation. When we moved in, my youngest was three. I worried at first but she had no problem getting down those steps and into my bed in the middle of the night. LOL.

 

I did keep a night light on the steps so they could see. Actually, this arrangement has worked really well as they have gotten older. The only thing I don't like is that my room is under the boys' bedroom and they walk like elephants. Otherwise, it just worked out OK for us.

 

Hey lady! How are you? Great idea. I'll get to get into the house again tonight or tomorrow and I'm assuming and hoping I'll find an outlet on the stair landing for this. Fortunately the only thing over our room will be an extra, full guest bathroom. *Should* be peaceful...LOL

 

My house is one story so obviously we are all on one level.

 

Several years ago we did a field trip to the Fire Dept and they recommended that all children on second floor each have own ladder in their room. They said that children as young as 3yrs have been able to use them to escape.

 

If that is your biggest fear, I would think ladders would be a good safety measure and maybe help ease your fears.

 

Thank you! Ladders and education it is. All windows in our area of the country have screens, so we'll provide how to get past the screens and how to use the ladders.

 

I wonder if the fire department does house visits to discuss things like this. I remember the fire department visits in school to discuss fire safety. Maybe a homeschool version? Worth a call.

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My husband's brother's family lives in a house like that. Four bedrooms up and master down. They decided they didn't like it and made the master bedroom a playroom. They took the biggest bedroom on the second floor. They will probably change it out when their youngest is a bit older, but for now, it's what works for them! Just another option to think about.

 

I don't ever want to be on a separate floor from my kids. Right now, it'd be my 13 yo who would worry me the most. He sleep walks. I'm always afraid he'll end up outside. He's tried going out a few times. Luckily, I'm an insomniac and light sleeper.

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Here's one for you: dh and I are upstairs and the kids are down! We live in an old house and renovated our attic space a few years ago, and the only way to make it work was to move our bedroom upstairs...wasn't room for 2 full bedrooms (my husband is an architect--he tried his hardest!). So every now and then I will break out in a cold sweat about it. We do have monitors in each room so we listen to them every night. And we have a security system for the house.

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Yes, we just moved our bedroom to the rec room on the bottom floor of our split level and our kids are 2 "stories" up! I had/have the same concerns but we set up an intercom and my 3yo doesn't seem to have any trouble stumbling just a bit further to our bed in the early morning. LOL!

 

We have smoke/CO detectors right outside our bedroom and the kids' bedrooms and I'm a light sleeper so I've made my peace with it as much as I'm going to. lol ;) Our room is like a little retreat now and I must say that it's really nice. The kids come in to sit on our couch and watch tv/movies sometimes, too, so it's a fun place. (They come in when we invite them, not whenever they feel like it...but that's another thread. hehe)

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Our master bedroom is upstairs and kids downstairs and we also keep the stairs lights on. Our solution was to install camera monitors in every room. I keep the computer monitor next to my bed on the nightstand and with one eye open I can see the kids in bed. I would blast the sound and could even hear when they moved the blanket (i was really freaked out leaving them alone). It's not 100% but I refused to move into the house until all cameras were installed. It can be costly but so worth it. I don't have the concern that you do of being upstairs so I can not help you there. Hope this helps.

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We have a 2 story house, and I felt exactly like you do. The master bedroom downstairs is DH's office, and I use the massive closet. Upstairs, we took the smaller of the rooms, and the boys use the other 2 BIG rooms. One holds their beds, and the other is their "media room." They like it, and I sleep better knowing we're all together.

 

DH thinks I'm ridiculous. :D

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Dh, ds13 and I are on the first floor (that means upstairs here in Australia), and dd15 in on the ground floor (downstairs). It concerned me at first but she LOVES it.

She locks the door at night and there is a grate on her window. No one can get in. That was my main concern. The other is fire- but we are the ones more in danger. She is close to the front door.

If it really bugged me enough I would get one of those baby monitors in the rooms, connected to my room. I have conisdered it but dd wouldnt like it most likely.

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In our Florida house there were two bedrooms on the first floor and two on the second plus a loft. We were on the first with the youngest and the other three were upstairs. I put lots of nite lights along the floors so that they could see easily and told them to stand in the loft and yell for me if they needed me and I would hear them and come help them. I could hear them easily and because of the lights we could all see our way around easily. We had an escape ladder from the loft window so it was a central gathering place in case of emergency.

 

The Brentwood house was a little more complicated because it was a split level with three floors and it was an older house and more soundproof. There was two rooms on the top floor so once again us and the youngest there. Three bedrooms downstairs so the rest of the kids there. It was only four short steps up to the foyer so the foyer was the gathering place. Once again lots of lights but the kids actually had to come to at least the bottom of my stairs to yell for me (this would be from the foyer). They were older then though and it worked fine.

 

Our current house has one bedroom on the first floor and through luck of the draw my youngest ended up with that one. This worries me a little more in case of break ins. I lock up tight and keep the dog downstairs and just pray that if anyone ever broke in they wouldn't notice the downstairs bedroom as it is kind of out of the main passage way. Still have lots of night lights but they are more for me these days than the kids. :001_smile:

 

All of my kids are informed of proper fire escape plans although I do worry about my 16 year old because she tends to be a life saver. She has risked her own life saving other children a few times already so I can't trust that she would actually leave the building on her own.

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Why don't you just take an upstairs bedroom?

 

I have a similar issue even though our house is all one level. The master is on the other side of the house. If there were a fire, it would most likely be between us and the dc. Until we had the twins, we used the largest bedroom on the other side of the house so we could be close to them.

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We used to have a 3500 sq ft home with Master bedroom and one bedroom on the main floor. The other 3 bedrooms and media room were upstairs.

My son is a teen. If I had a young one, it'd be a pain for late night issues like sickness, nightmares, etc... going up and down the staircase. We had our son sleep in the bedroom on the first floor -- close by us -- so it'd be easier when the tornado season kicked in and we'd have to huddle in the storm cellar.

 

The only issue besides dealing with bedrooms apart -- is if you have the kids use the upstairs for a playroom. It will be LOUD!!! Found that out the hard way. Our house design had an open balcony and kitchen/living room were directly below. Made watching TV impossible when son had friends come over for playdates.

 

We had other friends with kids and they had the same problem too. Just a heads up?

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Yes, mine is but my youngest is 12. When we lived in Belgium, at first we had our 14 yo son on a different floor and when he went off to college at 16, we moved his 12 yo sister there but kept the then 8/9 yo in the bedroom next to ours. In our last house before this, we had only one floor but on opposite sides of the house and I couldn't hear what was happening on the kid end. That was when youngest was 9.5. I am glad we didn't have those issues with younger ages.

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Our master bedroom is upstairs and the kids' rooms are downstairs. Since the house is small, hearing them has never really been a problem. Even if it were, the dogs usually start rattling their crates when they hear people noises in the middle of the night.

 

As far as the stairs go, we gate ours during the day so the 2yo can't disappear to the second floor, but they're left open at night. He learned to climb them not long after learning to walk, and now he's perfectly steady on them.

 

When we moved here, my younger dd was 2. She had never lived in a home with stairs. She had these mastered within a couple of months.

They get the hang of it pretty quickly!

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