How do you feel about fill in the blank thank you cards?

[battlemaiden]

I just opened two thank you cards from my nephews- 8 and 5. They were the fill in the blank "Dear___________, Thank You For the __________. It's the BEST! From, __________" type of card.

 

Perhaps I'm being too philosophical because I spent most of the afternoon walking my children through the thank you note process. I had my newly 6yods draw a picture and sign his name and I wrote a small note on the side. The 8, 10, and 12 yr olds wrote their own with some help from me. They also drew pictures at the bottom of the page.

 

My initial thoughts are if they are old enough I think they should write their own, if they are too young then the parent should write a note. But like I said it may have just arrived at a weird time for me.

 

What are your thoughts?

 

Jo

[Plucky]

I'm happy if the kiddo says thank you directly to me either in person or by phone. A thank you card is nice, too. I'm really laid back about this kind of thing though.

[Zelda]

I just opened two thank you cards from my nephews- 8 and 5. They were the fill in the blank "Dear___________, Thank You For the __________. It's the BEST! From, __________" type of card.

 

 

What are your thoughts?

 

Jo

 

I let my kids use these when they were new to writing...5-ish. My 6 yo is using regular cards this year. I think they are an effective stepping stone. I'd be alarmed to get one from a much older child.

 

Although, I get so few thank you cards from children that I think I'd take what I could get at this point.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I got a form letter like this from my adult nephew to thank me for his wedding gift! I think that for a very young child (Kinder level) it is fine. Otherwise I think they can write their own.

[battlemaiden]

I'm happy if the kiddo says thank you directly to me either in person or by phone. A thank you card is nice, too. I'm really laid back about this kind of thing though.

 

Okay. I must admit, I am horribly uptight about thank you notes. I'm pretty sure it is my English mum's fault. It is always the mum's fault, right?

 

I don't mind being called up on the phone and thanked, in some ways, that is even more special. These nephews live very far away. Honestly, they would never speak an utterance of thanks without being forced, but that really isn't my point. These cards are becoming more popular, and I'm wondering if I'm being a fuddy duddy about them. It took me a long time to see the benefit of e-vites too. :tongue_smilie: That is why I need a perspective check.

 

Jo

[Plucky]

I don't like e-vites at all. LOL See you are more relaxed than you think.

[Evergreen State Sue]

I spent the morning working on thank you notes with my kids too. It is a struggle to get them to write something personal about the gift or about the person to make it, you know, personal. So having been through that today, I too would have felt like maybe they (the mom? the kid?) took the easy way out. However, at least you got a thank you note. I am still waiting for graduation and wedding gift thank yous from last June. I'm left wondering if they got it, was it too weird of a gift, or are they just ungrateful.

[Suzanne in ABQ]

Were they preprinted like this, or did their mom write the "form letter" part, and they wrote "fill in the blanks" parts. I wouldn't like pre-printed, manufactered, marketed cards like this, but I'd understand if their mom didn't want to push them past their limits. My ds would have a terrible time writing anything at all at 5yo.

 

I used to help my kids when they were little. We had a standard format for a thank-you note. "Dear Grandma, Thank you for the (whatever). I really liked (that it makes fun sounds, or whatever). Love, DC

I would print it out for them on a separate sheet of paper, and I would draw faint lines on the thank-you note. Then, they would copy the note. It wasn't a fill-in-the-blanks note. It was all in their handwriting. But, it was definitely standardized (and more my work than theirs). As they've grown, they've developed their own style of writing and decorating their thank-you notes. But, those early notes set the habit in their young minds, and they never resist writing them now.

[Nestof3]

Honestly, I think they're fine. I am quite impressed when I receive a thank you card from anyone -- especially a child.

 

In fact, I think I did that when my boys were younger. I think it is really up to the parent to decide how much writing the child is capable of doing for 10 or so people. 5 is rather young, in my opinion.

 

I know few adults who even bother with thank you cards anymore.

[Colleen]

Fill-in-the-blank thank you notes? They're tacky and smack of laziness.

 

My guys have always (okay, not as infants:tongue_smilie:) written their own thank-you notes and it hasn't involved any cajoling on my part. It's just second nature to them.

[Jane in NC]

In my opinion, thank you notes are a stepping stone in life's training.

 

My son drew pictures when younger, wrote a simple sentence or two as the years progressed. Now, at age sixteen, I am proud to say that he kept a sheet of paper and pencil at his side on Christmas morning, making note of what gifts were sent to him by whom. He wrote scrap copies of thank you notes for my approval (and spelling corrections) then recopied the notes.

 

Relatives and friends like to know what my son is doing. Frankly I think that people are more inclined to send him something because he thanks them personally with comments on the gift.

 

Later in life, my son will need to write thank you notes to college admissions officers, people who interview him for jobs, etc. I believe that taking on the simpler task of saying thank you at a young age will ease him into the challenge of writing those letters later on.

 

By the way, I will be struggling with writing a sympathy note today. I do not buy preprinted cards, but write a note expressing condolences and recalling some pleasant memory of the person who passed on. I'll admit though that the note that I am about to write is for a person who was not the most kind which puts me on the verge of buying one of those preprinted sympathy cards. But is this the lesson that I want to share with my son? I suspect I'll struggle through...

 

Jane

[lynn]

At least you got one. My nieces and nephews never even say thank you, but then their parents aren't ones to teach proper manners.

[G5052]

If both parents worked or one had health issues, I'd be glad that they at least got the kids to do them. I've missed a few here and there in life when we've had major health crises, so I tend to cut folks some slack if I know that their lives are difficult. For a 5 y.o., I'm fine with that type of thing, and if the 8 y.o. had literacy issues, I'd overlook it. I do find that type of thing irritating for teens and adults who basically have the time to do it but put other things first.

 

That said, my kids are spending this whole week writing them, and most of them will have a note from me too.

[Tree House Academy]

I think they are fine. I have some that we actually have never used, but really, isn't it the thought that counts? I mean, they thought enough to have the child fill in the blanks and send a thank you card. That is more than I can say of some of the graduating teenagers I sent money to last year. I would have been thrilled just to get a fill in the blank card.

[Ferdie]

I would be so excited to get a thank you note from my niece or nephew. I'll take one in any form.

[PiCO]

I just opened two thank you cards from my nephews- 8 and 5. They were the fill in the blank "Dear___________, Thank You For the __________. It's the BEST! From, __________" type of card.

 

 

Too impersonal. I mean, come on- just do it on the computer and personalize it a little. My dds did that when they were 5. "It's the BEST!?" Give me a break.

 

I'm not a stickler for thank you cards, but I'd rather get something sloppy on a piece of scrap paper than a fill-in-the blank.

[Tammyla]

I think they are tacky, but better than nothing. I sent gifts for years in the mail wondering...Did they get them:confused: wondering if I could toss my mail/insurance receipt.

 

We will be getting ours out today and tomorrow as handwritten notes take a little more time and everything.;)

 

As my Southern mom would say something like... Manners can be taught, but bless his heart he/she never was. Now go write your thank you notes...:D

[Tammyla]

Dear__Jo_________, Thank You For the ___post_______. It's the BEST! From, __Tammy________ .

 

What are your thoughts?

[kewb]

I think it shows the parents are at least trying to follow the rules of etiquette. I am appreciative of any thank you. I have taught my kids to write their own thank you cards-but that is me.

 

As for evite-I resisted it for a very long time. I am now a lover of evite.

[AuntPol]

Considering most adults don't even send a Thank You card, it's impressive that a child did (even coerced). I see nothing wrong with a fill in the blank card for kids under ten, especially boys.

 

We did computer generated and fill in the blank cards up until this year for my youngest. He just loathes writing and it is going to take us a month to get all his thank you's written considering that we have other writing assignments and I can only expect so much from him. If I felt that I had to get them out immediately and he would have to do them all quickly, we would have had to do some sort of fill in the blank.

 

My dd who loves to write and create, makes her own cards and writes her own thank yous. She enjoys it once she does it but I do have to prod her as she can't stand for me to "assign" her anything.

[texascamps]

I'm a stickler for thoughtful Thank You notes. Even when my kids couldn't write, I had them draw a picture of what they recieved and write as well as they could Thank You. I then wrote Thank You somewhere on it.

 

Its tedious and all but I want the kids to be sincere. Now, the older ones can write so they try to write a good note. Thanks, I appreciate it... I've been wanting one... It looks great on me.

 

 

Maybe it was my southern upbringing or my mother's society influence, but I believe Thank You's should be sincere and thoughtful.

 

However, notes of any kind are becoming passe so I guess I'd be happy that they sent a note of any kind.

[Ellie]

I never use preprinted thank you cards. Neither did my dc.

[Zelda]

You know what would be fun? To compare the answers to the question, "Do You Like to Give or Receive", to the same posters' answers to, "What Kind of Thank You is Acceptable". I mean, not actual fun, like repeatedly hitting yourself over the head with a hammer. Maybe revealing would be a better adjective than fun.

[Parrothead]

The Fill-in-the-blanks cards seem like a lot of work for a little kid. They have to write the recipient's name, the gift, and their name. A big handwritten "Thank you!" and a picture would be less work. So I really can't go with the preprinted cards being less work for the child.

 

By the time the a kiddo is writing well enough to be legible, he should be able to write, "Thank you for the toy."

 

As he gets older adding a more personal touch gets easier. So to me the fill-in cards are a waste of money.

[Word Nerd]

Considering that my teenage niece just stared at me when I handed her a gift and didn't so much as utter "thanks" at any point in the exchange, I would be happy to receive one.

[GailV]

For the 5yo I think it's fine. For the 8yo, it depends on the child. My girls could do that much copywork easily -- and, really, it isn't that huge of a leap from fill-in-the-blank to copywork. But other 8yos might struggle with that much writing, taking 2 or 3 days per card. Yikes!

 

Of course, that's what I would expect from my children and my siblings' children. My in-laws are another story, and if they even acknowledged the gift I'd faint with shock. I use Delivery Confirmation on their gifts, since otherwise I wouldn't have a clue if the gifts ever arrived.

[Colleen]

You know what would be fun? To compare the answers to the question, "Do You Like to Give or Receive", to the same posters' answers to, "What Kind of Thank You is Acceptable". I mean, not actual fun, like repeatedly hitting yourself over the head with a hammer. Maybe revealing would be a better adjective than fun.

 

How so?

[The Governess]

I'm going to use some this year with my 4 yo, who has just learned how to write all of her letters but would be overwhelmed with having to think up and write a sentence or two in a card. I think it's great for kids who are just developing their writing skills. Next year she'll probably be at the point where she can write her own.

 

I'm of the mind that once your child is capable of writing a couple sentences on their own, it's better for them to use their own words.

[PariSarah]

. . . writing thank you notes. Terrific idea for a preschooler or kindergartner.

 

But I can't imagine using them past the stage where a child could reasonably be expected to copy two sentences in his own handwriting. Maybe second grade, at the very, very latest?

 

Of course, I always count writing thank-you notes as schoolwork, so it's pretty easy to get them done. Just substitute thank-you notes for copywork or penmanship or writing for the first week after Christmas, and walla! I can see why it would be more of a hassle for someone who's not homeschooling.

[Lizzie in Ma]

Her perspective was that if someone took the time and spent the money to choose something just for you, than a note is the right thing to do.

I have tried to raise my girls in the same manner.

Maybe it is old fashioned but I appreciate them. I do not expect them, not in this day and age, but I do appreciate them.

I usually have my girls write 2 really nice thank you notes a day until they are done after birthdays and Christmas.

[Pretty in Pink]

I appreciate a phone call or a thank you card, sure. I think it is rude not to acknowledge a gift. That said, many of us weren't brought up to send thank you cards or call and say thank you. I was not aware of thank you cards being customary until my own wedding when an old lady from the church questioned me about not having received one. I was so embarrased but grateful that it was brought to my attention.

 

My oldest son writes his own, personalized thank you notes. I have printed out black and white drawings on cardstock for my little ones to color. They trace the words 'thank you' and their name on the back.

[Desert Rat]

My ds uses these because he's a very reluctant writer and quite frankly the battle for me isn't worth it. But I do think it's cheating a bit. I think it depends on the age of the child. As he is more confident (read less combative) about his writing, we will switch over to standard notes.