Phones and tech devices are wonderful, can we just acknowledge it?

[Ginevra]

This post is not located where the criticism is and I don’t know how to make memes that would illustrate it, but it is a response, if you have seen them, to memes that are meant to show how disconnected phones and mobile devices are “making” us these days. 

Well, okay, there’s accuracy there in some respects. I, too, have been at a restaurant where a couple sits across from one another, lost in their individual phones, and I have seen groups of kids at an event, all on their phones. I have seen moms at the park, on a phone, not interacting with the kiddos. Yes, I have seen all these scenarios and I acknowledge they do happen. 

Also, though: I FaceTimed with my dd, who is thousands of miles away! I could see her blonde ponytail across the Atlantic Ocean! She showed me her dorm where she is staying and the rice cooker in which she figured out a way to make pasta. All this connection is possible because of the absolute mind-boggling marvel of our smart phones! 

Not to mention the ease with which I can learn about anything, figure things out, find my way, read a book, watch a movie, a TED talk, a podcast...I can do a different yoga session every day with my yoga app and listen to a different guided meditation every day with my meditation app. Ds doesn’t remember how to graph inequalities? Watch this Khan Academy video! 

It’s amazing. 

If I had the technical and video editing skills to do it, I would make a video meme to put on FB which would show the dozens of ways a smartphone makes my life easier and better, as well as *facilitates* connection, unlike the doom-and-gloom memes I keep seeing turning up on SM. 

[itsheresomewhere]

 I agree with you.  Thanks to technology, people who never had a voice or had issues communicating can.  The iPad and now other devices have been wonderful in so many ways for those especially with certain disabilities.

[MeaganS]

Hey, even at the park. I hate playing with my kids there. It is so boring to me and most of the reason I take them to the park is to play without me. I spend plenty of quality time with them at home. I feel no guilt at all being in my phone there. 

My relationship with dh would be a lot worse. He's in a demanding job and works many hours. But all day we can text back and forth. Me telling him about things the girls are doing and just talking. Him responding when he has a chance. Texting is a huge part of our relationship. 

And YouTube diy helps! I've saved thousands of dollars doing things I'd never have the guys to do without explicit instruction. You can learn to do anything online. 

And homeschooling. I never would have homeschooled without the resources and know-how I found online. 

Edited October 9, 2019 by MeaganS

[MEmama]

Thank you!

I am so over people dissing technology, as if they don’t all benefit from it. I work in an old, backward-facing community and every day I hear people moan about kids these days on their phones and video games, and boast about how they themselves can’t figure out email (as if it’s something to be proud of!) and how computers make life harder and on and on. It’s exhausting and I hate it but of course I have to keep my mouth shut, even when I feel like telling them how much life they are missing out on and how ignorant they sound. It’s really become a sore spot for me.

 

[Targhee]

I agree it’s amazing! It is so great to connect to people who you feel you can relate with even though they are no one you’ve met in person.  And it’s wonderful to connect with family and friends you do know but aren’t around all the time. But I also think it’s so much easier for those of us who grew up without them to self regulate their use.  We are seeing the first young adults that had them as part of their formative years and they are really struggling.  Also, those who might have baseline difficulties with self regulation are having extreme difficulties because the phone is easy to disregulate on.

[fairfarmhand]

I love that my kids and I can stay in daily contact with my brother who lives in turkey. Otherwise we’d lose touch. It takes 4-6 weeks for a letter to arrive!

[Guest]

1 hour ago, MEmama said:

Thank you!

I am so over people dissing technology, as if they don’t all benefit from it. I work in an old, backward-facing community and every day I hear people moan about kids these days on their phones and video games, and boast about how they themselves can’t figure out email (as if it’s something to be proud of!) and how computers make life harder and on and on. It’s exhausting and I hate it but of course I have to keep my mouth shut, even when I feel like telling them how much life they are missing out on and how ignorant they sound. It’s really become a sore spot for me.

 

Yes. I also find it quite ironic that this stuff is posted on social media, by people who are using social media. It’s...a little baffling. 

Again, yes, there can be downsides, and certainly some people are totally mastered by their devices instead of the reverse. But I sure don’t want to go back to the “old way.” I love technology! I love my devices! 

I have one SIL who railed against email for just THE LONGEST TIME. She refused to use it. She declared she would never use it because it’s so “impersonal.” Then she did the same thing about texting when that became a thing. She complained about texting. I even remember one time, she was griping because she was trying to plan a dinner at a restaurant with her mom and some other relatives. She complained because it was so tedious calling people back and forth to try and get the details ironed out. I was like, “Ugh...that’s why people like group texts. So much easier!” She did eventually come around and even has a FB now, although I’m not sure she ever really *embraced* technology. But she did get up to speed on the basics. 

[Chris in VA]

I'm 5,500 miles, give or take, from my parents, kids and old friends. You bet your sweet bippy I love technology. 

(I'm going to work that phrase into my day every way I can today.)

[DesertBlossom]

When DH was deployed 3 years ago we could video chat and text all day. I thought a lot about my grandmother, sending a telegram to my grandfather who was serving in WWII about the birth of my mother. I just can't even imagine.

[CAJinBE]

I agree completely. I also think that it's okay to be on your phones with other people in a restaurant sometimes. Like when we are traveling together and are together 24/7, looking at our phones is a little bit of downtime while still together. My kids are at university and it is so easy to keep in touch now. When I was at school, my parents rarely called "long distance." It was too expensive. When my dh was deployed we only had the rare, short phone call with that awkward delay. I hated it. Also for co-op I can seamlessly use my phone, tablet, mini-projector, laptop, and good "old-fashioned" white board markers to get the message across in the best way possible. We grew up with copying off the black board and there is certainly a lot of value in that as well. Now we have choices.

[TravelingChris]

I love technology.  I am currently cruising in the Atlantic and am communicating with all of you, helping people on Facebook, and  getting news that my one daughter is having a job interview today.

A few years ago, part of our family were at an outdoor dance party and with my cellphone letting dd in New Zealand hear the music and see some of the dancing while we saw her apartment and the dinner she made.

Also, as a disabled person who has many times where I am alone and unable to leave the house, technology lets me enjoy entertainment and communicate with family, friends, and fellow sufferers.

 

 

[Guest]

1 hour ago, CAJinBE said:

I agree completely. I also think that it's okay to be on your phones with other people in a restaurant sometimes. Like when we are traveling together and are together 24/7, looking at our phones is a little bit of downtime while still together. My kids are at university and it is so easy to keep in touch now. When I was at school, my parents rarely called "long distance." It was too expensive. When my dh was deployed we only had the rare, short phone call with that awkward delay. I hated it. Also for co-op I can seamlessly use my phone, tablet, mini-projector, laptop, and good "old-fashioned" white board markers to get the message across in the best way possible. We grew up with copying off the black board and there is certainly a lot of value in that as well. Now we have choices.

Sometimes, the technology Luddites show images like this and I think, “well, hang on. How is that really any different from when one person was reading the newspaper and the other was, say, balancing the checkbook?” You can sit companionably with people without staring into their eyes 100% of the time. 

[HomeAgain]

I love technology.
We bought our last house without stepping foot in it first.  Our realtor Facetimed us a walkthrough, we signed most of the documents while we were sitting on a plane and immediately sent them back..it was amazing to feel in control there instead of waiting for packets to go back and forth through the mail.
It's all the little things now that I barely even think about.
I don't have to carry a paper planner.  It's all on my phone, color coded. 
Parents don't have to play phone tag when there is a question that affects the whole group.  A text does it and everyone gets the answer at the same time.
I sat here this morning and balanced my budget, because I could, just by looking at my accounts on my phone and the electronic budget app I use.
I can know ANYTHING.  My kids can know anything.  I learned how to replace a bathtub drain that had corroded out because of youtube.
I have access to books that are out of print.  They're either available online for free or I can get them print-on-demand.
If my kid gets lost, I have a picture of him available taken that day so I know exactly what he is wearing.

I love technology.  It has made life so much easier.

[marbel]

41 minutes ago, Quill said:

Sometimes, the technology Luddites show images like this and I think, “well, hang on. How is that really any different from when one person was reading the newspaper and the other was, say, balancing the checkbook?” You can sit companionably with people without staring into their eyes 100% of the time. 

I agree.  I don't think people would blink at a couple in a cafe each reading their own *book* - as in, real book, not on a device.

The other thing is - people see others in a brief moment in time.  The couple on separate phones at a restaurant?  Maybe they just received bad news from a doctor and are researching treatment plans. Or excitedly planning their their 25th anniversary trip-of-a-lifetime.  The mom at the park ignoring her kids? Maybe she just spent the morning having tea parties and reading The Runaway Bunny 10 times in a row and needs a break. Or struggled with a math or phonics lesson. Or just got some bad news about Grandma's health and needed to get away for a few minutes.

 

[Ottakee]

I can almost run my life off my phone...banking, appointments, emails, DHHS and Social Security for my kids, etc.

I just wish I knew how to control the phone better for my young adults with special needs who are swept up into every major drama there is 

[catz]

I love my phone in new ways now that I have a kid at college!  We text back and forth all the time.  I am pretty sure I learn more about what he is doing this way if I just talked to him every few days.  

Homeschoooling teens is isolating.  I'm not connecting to other adults and moms right now like I did when my kids were younger.  Online boards have kind of become a life line for me right now.  I run my life online and do a lot of volunteer work online.  I do contract teaching and tutoring at times and do all that planning online.  I've discovered google drive is the best thing ever for sharing docs.  

I don't even judge or care if I see a family all plugged into their phones.  Sometimes we end up at a restaurant after engaging with humans all day and we need some downtime.  One time we were at a restaurant and an older man came over to berate my daughter for being on her phone.  After performing in 2 high energy shows with a large cast for an audience of 700+ the same day and having tickets to SEE a show that evening.  Oh heck no, mister, no you didn't.  And funny how he ignored my son who was doing the same sitting right next to her.   Don't make assumptions or offer an opinion where it wasn't solicited.  

Edited October 10, 2019 by FuzzyCatz

[MercyA]

People love to be outraged about something. Just let it roll off if you can. 

Technology rocks. I wouldn't know all of you amazing people without it! ❤️

Edited October 10, 2019 by MercyA

[Lizzie in Ma]

Totally with you.  I adore technology and appreciate all of it!

[stephanier.1765]

I Facetime several times a week with my 11 month granddaughter. We're hoping it will help her to remember me instead of her needing to warm up to me each time I visit. Mostly my face is split into a big grin as I watch her do her baby things. As I talk to her or play silly games over the phone, I'll get some face splitting grins from her as well. It makes me heart swell so much it may just burst with happiness one day. Technology is awesome!

[HS Mom in NC]

I agree.  Like most things in life, it can be used well or used badly, the choice is up to the user. Choose well.

I do think parental controls could be better designed, and I need to be more disciplined about my tech usage like so many other people, but overall it's a big win.

[Farrar]

Yep. Most of the time, when I'm on my phone, a decade ago I would have just been holding a magazine or a puzzle book instead. I do have some concerns about it... but mostly it's good.