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Targhee

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About Targhee

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  1. Had a very similar situation with DS. He’s not got ASD dx but I have wondered sometimes - his sister got a dx just recently and they share so many traits. He does have ADHD dx, is overwhelmed by full time school days, and prefers alone time. This year with his heavy school load he just wants to be alone making music at the end of the day. I tell him he is not responsible for friend’s happiness. He is responsible for being kind, honest, and setting his personal boundaries for mental health. When his friend asks to hang out and DS doesn’t want to right then I tell him to say “I’m needing some time to myself, want to hang out [insert a better time here]?” Yes, I’m grateful for this friend and it is DS’s only close one, and want friend to be happy and healthy BUT I also need to teach DS that he doesn’t need to strain his own mental health to accommodate others. This is important - he doesn’t need to mask or conform to another’s needs or demands because that person is mentally fragile when so doing could very likely result in his own mental fragility. I know this from my DD and my niece 😞 I also try to have conversations with his friend, wish him luck with things, notice his new clothes or hair style, etc. I can do this, which has a smaller impact than if DS did it but is positive anyway, because i am in a place mentally/emotionally to give.
  2. I no longer have a boy that age but my girl that age gets around 12 hours a week of entertainment/free choice screens. And that’s on the weekends. During the week there’s about 45-60 min each day of school on the computer (BA, Typing, Language nut, and sometimes an episode of Wild Kratz or Magic School Bus), but no entertainment screens.
  3. Higher education is (and has been) suffering from an identity crisis. It looks more like (and I hear lots of demand for) a career prep program, a glorified vocational training. It used to be about liberal arts building rational and capable thinkers able to tackle most any career (given some internship or job-specific training at the job site). Now there’s a huge demand for a la carte learning. Combine that with definite anti-intellectualism in the country and you get autodidacts edu-hacking. Is that bad? No. But, Amazon-like delivery of educational services, although serving a purpose, will probably be the nail in classical education’s coffin. ETA With this shift we also move much of our academic standards from high school to colleges. “College for all” did not help those from outside the academic/financial elites, it just brought the bar down for everyone.
  4. Agreed. And might I add that programs which do not involve human contact do not foster humane development. They add to the overall digital Harlow’s Monkey affecting the emotional development of our youth.
  5. Last year DS went to daily classes from 8-9:45 at the middle school (band and science), then did work at home from 10-2:30. That times included his online classes, classes with me, and interest driven work. I’m not sure how much really happened at the middle school 🤷‍♀️ so I’d guess 5.5 hours. He also did soccer, Scouts, and private music lessons/practicing outside of that time.
  6. Yes, they do! And it’s exactly why we love them (and why my 3rd trader is currently using them). My kids, on the whole, do best when they know the big picture - the whys and hows and where things fit in - first. And MCT does that, beautifully, gently, yet thoroughly. It isn’t for everyone, certainly, but it is for many for whom the “anything else we suggested” programs are not effective.
  7. Strategy requires organizational skills. My guess is that there is higher interest for him and therefore better results?
  8. Piano ETA Keyboard can be a stand-in if needed. Piano is an excellent foundational instrument as it introduces more theory, percussion/rhythm, harmony, and dynamics earlier on.
  9. Towels - Costco has great bath towels that lasts long time. Doesn’t have a huge color variety but they are great. They have great sheets too. Not the cheap options but the higher end options (but still cheap, it’s Costco) Knife block - we for years had a Henkels block on the counter and it was great. I wanted clear-as-possible counters in the new house so we bought an in-drawer block and I love it! The entire drawer has sharp implements and small cutting board and is located where I do fresh food prep so it’s perfect. https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0009NMVV4/ref=ppx_yo_mob_b_inactive_ship_o0_img?ie=UTF8&psc=1 mattresses - we have twin mattresses from Costco and they are good. We ordered a Queen firm mattress from Sleepzz and are very happy with it. They let you no-risk sleep on it for 90 days (free return) if you don’t like it. Home Goods - we have bought some things here. None of the furniture has ever been really solid, so I would only buy piece that need to look nice but won’t be getting much touching. This is a good store for throw pillows and other soft goods.
  10. Had chicken pox at age 2 pretty severely. Reexposed at age 12 when my brother had them. I have not got vaccine/booster for shingles, and kids did get chicken pox vaccine. ETA I did get small pox vaccine at 23 while working in a virology lab. Just the single pock on my shoulder was intensely itchy and uncomfortable. I can’t imagine having the disease and am grateful for vaccines on the whole! Im conflicted about cpox vaccinations for all because of the loss of re exposure and the rise of shingles. But I’m sure I’ll get the shingles one when recommended.
  11. Every flooring can be ruined - even concrete - and even vinyl. We have LVP over 2100 sq ft of flooring. We no longer have toddlers but do have a gang of 6-9 year olds from the neighborhood coming through all the time plus two dogs. LVP *can* be softer than hard wood, but only if you get the type that has a soft/cushioned layer in the “sandwich” of layers on the plank. Otherwise it’s just as hard as the subfloor. LVP is susceptible to gouging and scratching. How susceptible depends on the wear layer that is over the vinyl layer in the plank “sandwich.” The lightest scratches can sometime be taken care of with a super fine sandpaper and mineral oil. Otherwise you have to replace the plank. With gluedown application that’s easier than floating floor (tongue and groove application) but it’s usually the floating floor that has the cushioned layer. That top wear layer that prevents scratches is also a factor in how much the vinyl fades from UV exposure. Also, the embossing that makes it look even more like wood grain can be a cleaning difficulty. It creates grooves, and things like paint can get stuck in there and it’s a bear to clean. I don’t know about the brand you are looking at, but I suggest getting a sample and putting it through the wringer! LVP is good for lots of reasons - price and water resistance are probably the biggest! But I wanted to point out the shortcomings we have noticed. Good luck! ETA we didn’t let movers on our new LVP for fear they would scratch or gouge it with the furniture. Our teenagers don’t really bother it, and with as many people forgetting to remove shoes, spilling water, and others just not thinking about the floor I’m glad we have the LVP
  12. But women jump in to explain to others when they feel authority/expertise on the subject. It happens all the dang time. Just because it was a man doesn’t mean he was doing because his perceived authority was his manhood- in this case the authority was he’s the AUTHOR. It can be quite rude, and is usually annoying at a minimum but it isn’t sexist unless the perceived authority is based on gender. This wasn’t mansplaining.
  13. If I could emphasize only one message to my kids - them knowing all the things Maize mentioned - it would be this: You can always come home.
  14. Why did he think he needed to cheat? That’s where I’d start.
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