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Reception dinner, but no coffee or tea?


marbel
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Not necessarily desensitized. Caffeine makes some people (even children) sleepy.

I have a son that will quite literally pass out and wake up the next day if he has a cup of coffee.

 

Me? I'm used to be cranky without it, but it doesn't change my energy level. Several pots a day doesn't give me any more energy than none. And lately I don't even crave one cup. I do enjoy a nice cup with a dessert though. Or sometimes I just want a nice hot drink in hand on a cold night.

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My concern with caffeine late at night is more about trips to the bathroom all night (well, really that's my concern other times of day where it'd be disruptive like during a movie at the theater)

Coffee doesn't do that to me.

 

Tea though? Ugh. If I have a glass of iced tea (always unsweet) after noon, I will be peeing all dadblum night and get no sleep at all due to bathroom trips to pee.

 

I don't know why tea does that but not coffee and not water and not wine.

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Coffee doesn't do that to me.

 

Tea though? Ugh. If I have a glass of iced tea (always unsweet) after noon, I will be peeing all dadblum night and get no sleep at all due to bathroom trips to pee.

 

I don't know why tea does that but not coffee and not water and not wine.

 

The tannins in tea can be a bladder irritant. Does it to me too. 

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I'm curious -- what do they serve to drink with the dessert course?

 

At our house, we usually have fruit for dessert if anything as I'm not a big sweets person.  Drinks are the same choices we had with dinner.  Coffee is not one of them as I don't have any or a way to make it.

 

When I've been at more formal events or restaurants servers come around asking if anyone would like more water, coffee, or anything else.  I don't recall anyone ever taking them up on coffee (who hadn't already had it with the meal anyway), so assumed it was pretty much a formality.  We don't always sit with friends/family.  Some events we go to have assigned tables so we're often with complete strangers.

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And I'm learning that people drink coffee at night... I'm trying to think if I know anyone who does that... breakfast, yes. Lunch, sometimes, but not often. After that? Only if they NEED to stay up at night and are using it for that purpose.

 

It wouldn't have occurred to me to have it even if suggested. I'd have thought, "no one drinks it at that hour!"

 

Now I'm wondering how they sleep at night... even decaf has some caffeine. ;)

 

I'd have offered more than just water though - perhaps lemonade or sodas.

Dh and I have a cup of coffee roughly around 9pm every night. It is delicious and doesn't keep us up.

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Id guarantee, around here, (some) people would have already brought their own Tim Horton's into the reception. And others would leave and go get it when no coffee was served.

 

:laugh:  Yes, that would definitely happen around here, too. It's such a Canadian thing. 

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I'm just glad they had the option of water.

 

I have taken to keeping a case of bottled water in my van at all times because I cannot count how often the only drink options were soda. Maybe some lemonade too. No water. No unsweet tea. No coffee of any kind.

 

No one in my house drinks soda except Dh (who only drinks one kind of soda) and none of us drink sugar drinks. We are water, black coffee or unsweet tea people. Neither Dh or I drink alcohol when alone because we don't even have one drink if we are driving.

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Dh and I have a cup of coffee roughly around 9pm every night. It is delicious and doesn't keep us up.

 

It won't if your body is used to it.  I had forgotten that part.  ;)

 

It's not any different than many people needing caffeine in the morning to get started.  If they don't have it, it is often worse via a headache or similar.

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Actually, if the hosts were aware of caffeine's affect on drunk folks, maybe they purposely chose to avoid having those options available.  It depends on their awareness and how drunk they thought folks might get.

 

That seems unlikely to me.  In my circles there is no expectation that drinking = drunkenness.  And if someone were to get to the point that they should not drive, someone would get them home another way.  

 

If anything, having only water and alcoholic beverages would be likely to increase the consuming of alcoholic beverages.  That's just a guess on my part. 

 

 

Anyway, I'm quite surprised that coffee after dinner is not more common.  In my adult life I've never had people over for dinner and not offered coffee and tea afterward. I wouldn't say that 100% of people take it, but more do than don't.  We typically ask if anyone prefers decaf and if one person does, that's what we make. But often we make two pots, one regular and one decaf.   

 

I'll likely never know if the lack of coffee was an oversight or intentional.  It doesn't matter.  I was just curious. :-)

Edited by marbel
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That seems unlikely to me.  In my circles there is no expectation that drinking = drunkenness.  And if someone were to get to the point that they should not drive, someone would get them home another way.  

 

If anything, having only water and alcoholic beverages would be likely to increase the consuming of alcoholic beverages. 

 

I agree.  It was just a brainstorm more than a thought out reason.  I see plenty of flaws with it myself.

 

Now, of course, you have us all wondering why it was left out - intentional, accidental, or no clue that anyone would want it?  ;)

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Even if I wasn't a coffee drinker, I'd keep instant coffee and tea bags around in case any visitors wanted some.  You don't need special equipment to make those.  :)

 

That said, I never offer alcohol to visitors (unless we're having an all-out party), which some people may find odd.  I do have some around the house, which people have given us over the years.  Since I don't drink the stuff, I have no idea what I have or how good it is.  But if an adult houseguest wants some, I'm happy to share.  :P

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I have only attended wedding dinners at hotels. Coffee and English tea isn't typically served with Chinese wedding banquets but guests can order a cup for themselves and the hotel catering service would provide an individual serving.

 

Western style wedding receptions my relatives and friends hosted are typically afternoon affairs and those would have coffee and tea self serve stations.

Edited by Arcadia
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When I was catering we had many such events. People don't want to pay $80 for a gallon of coffee to be catered.

This is it, I bet. IME working events, one way to cut costs was to cut out the coffee service. Catered coffee is WAY more expensive than brewing up the same amount at home. In fact, the server's statement that "no one ordered coffee" was probably the standard reply given when the bride/groom/hosts paying the bill didn't offer coffee. I'd estimate that about 20% of wedding clients and 40% of corporate clients at our events chose to not offer coffee.

Edited by Seasider
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I'd be disappointed.  

 

We don't ordinarily have coffee at night, but we don't ordinarily have dessert, either.  I associate the one with the other, and both with lingering.  If we have people over, I serve dessert and make a pot of decaf.  If we're eating out, I usually get a cup of decaf when my kids order dessert.

 

I can't imagine that the caterers / planner didn't suggest coffee and tea even if it didn't occur to the bride and groom.  That's odd.

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Desensitized to it I can believe - your body has learned to adjust and probably even needs it or will be unhappy.  (Mine is this way during the daytime.) I don't think it's possible for the human body not to be affected by it on the cellular level.

 

I can drink coffee or soda right before bed and have no effect at all.  My 23andme report said I have a genetic variant linked to really fast breakdown of caffeine.  The only time it's ever made me jittery was the day I came home from work to a new espresso machine and drank 4 in less than an hour (trying out different recipes).  And jittery isn't quite the right word for it.  More like happy, talkative and unable to relax.  For about half an hour.  I slept fine a few hours later.

 

Tea, though, has some other stimulant besides caffeine that I don't break down very well.  If I drink more than a glass of iced tea after noon I won't be able to sleep, but it doesn't make me feel hyper.  Just not drowsy.

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I would have been a bit upset.

 

It doesn't sound like it was an open bar.

I have been to several weddings lately where there was beer and wine, but no hard booze.  Those pinterest weddings have big tubs with ice and beers in them (cans or bottles) and then big glass things with a spout with wine in them.  No bartender, and no mixed drinks.

 

But they all have had coffee and tea.  I would be very surprised as well!

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I don't drink coffee, so I wouldn't care or notice, but dh absolutely can't eat baked goods without coffee (and vice versa), so that would be an issue for him. Neither of us drink, and water doesn't sound very good with cake. I would have asked for a glass of milk.

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It won't if your body is used to it.  I had forgotten that part.   ;)

 

 

 

But it's more than that, actually.  There is a gene whereby people either metabolize caffeine quickly or slowly.

 

If you metabolize it quickly, then you can often drink coffee in the evening and it won't bother you.

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