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Homeschooling parents killed in Halloween car accident


TianXiaXueXiao
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I saw this.

 

But a question: some of those kids are certainly old enough to realize mom and dad should have arrived home by then. Didn't they ask? If the officer didn't lie, what did he say to a direct question. Assuming the parents always were there for Halloween, wouldn't most realized that something was wrong ? Otherwise why would the police be there?

 

Maybe I just feel like the kids will now linkt Halloween with being lied to and a tragic death. But given that there is no possible good outcome for what happened, I think the officer did an amazing job showing humanity to kids who desperately needed it

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I think it's possible that the kids had figured it out, but wanted to wait and hear the news when their grandma arrived. The girl had watched enough episodes of Law and Order SVU to fill her DVR so I am guessing she is savvy. I would surmise that the older kids wanted to protect the younger ones and went along with the charade enthusiastically and graciously. Bless them all.

 

Coming back to add that I just read one article where the officer reports that the oldest son knew something was up and he asked if the trooper was going to be honest with him.

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This story has absolutely wrecked me. The thought that my children wouldn't be homeschooled should the unthinkable happen to my husband and myself is terrifying given the state of our public schools today. I am hoping that seeing how they have raised above what they were trying for, that the children can still be homeschooled to some extent. I know that my husband and I have enough life insurance to pay for our children to go to college and honestly for my cousin (who would get our children) to stop working, but I am not sure if she would or not. Guess I need to sit down and talk to her about the unthinkable. :( At least my cousin lives near my in-laws, who homeschooled my brother-in-law, and while they would no doubt be a thorn in my side if they lived near me, they at least know how to homeschool. 

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IMO, the 13 year old deserved to know immediately.

 

I understand not telling the younger kids right away, though.

 

 

ETA: Just read another article. Didn't any of the kids (especially the 13 year old) wonder where the parents were for so many hours?

How could they tell him and not the younger ones? What a burden. Maybe the grandmother asked them to wait, or they were waiting on a social worker to assist. I don't envy the LEO's job at all, and this must be such a difficult aspect for them. They're not trained counselors. The department's publicizing it seems a bit icky though.

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They've raised almost $300,000 for those kids with all this publicity. And they were just trying to do the nicest thing they could for these kids.

Yes, that aspect is nice. The initial publicity seemed more PR-focused for the department, which is what gave me the icky feeling.

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How could they tell him and not the younger ones? What a burden. Maybe the grandmother asked them to wait, or they were waiting on a social worker to assist. I don't envy the LEO's job at all, and this must be such a difficult aspect for them. They're not trained counselors. The department's publicizing it seems a bit icky though.

 

Totally agree! 

 

I just imagine a 13 year old feeling betrayed in the end... or being suspicious in the hours waiting at the police station.

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Totally agree! 

 

I just imagine a 13 year old feeling betrayed in the end... or being suspicious in the hours waiting at the police station.

 

He knew that the trooper wasn't telling him the whole truth. He asked the trooper point blank and the trooper told him that he would tell him everything later. I don't think he feels betrayed. He feels cared for.

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He knew that the trooper wasn't telling him the whole truth. He asked the trooper point blank and the trooper told him that he would tell him everything later. I don't think he feels betrayed. He feels cared for.

 

Oh!

 

I didn't catch that in either of the articles I read. 

 

It all makes a lot more sense now.  :o

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He knew that the trooper wasn't telling him the whole truth. He asked the trooper point blank and the trooper told him that he would tell him everything later. I don't think he feels betrayed. He feels cared for.

I agree. The article I read says the oldest helped distract the younger kids through out the night. I don't think anyone feels betrayed in this case.

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I agree. The article I read says the oldest helped distract the younger kids through out the night. I don't think anyone feels betrayed in this case.

 

I can totally see that now. The articles I read made it sound like the kids were just having a jolly good time waiting for their parents to come home, and I couldn't believe the 13 year old didn't see past it. 

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I cried when I read this story. It's just so awful.

 

I actually wanted to post here if anyone knew them, through a homeschooling group or something.  They sounded like they'd fit in on this message board.

 

I'm glad that they're receiving so much support.

 

I read that in one interview, the 13yo said that he knew when the trooper invited them all along to hang out, but went along with it.  I'm sure he was in shock, holding on to some hope that he was mistaken, and wanted to protect his younger siblings. 

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How could they tell him and not the younger ones? What a burden. Maybe the grandmother asked them to wait, or they were waiting on a social worker to assist. I don't envy the LEO's job at all, and this must be such a difficult aspect for them. They're not trained counselors. The department's publicizing it seems a bit icky though.

 

I think that in the trooper's account, he said that he and the grandmother decided to wait to tell them until she got there.  I don't know if the grandmother requested it specifically, but it wouldn't surprise me if there's some official, or at least "best-practice," protocol about having another family member in the room when young children are told such terrible news, so that they can have immediate support from a loved one.  If something happened to me, I would want my kids to be told with a familiar face to hug and comfort them immediately, instead of a strange policeman and social worker (who I imagine are probably discouraged from touching and cuddling kids they've just met?  And you try telling a 4 year old that they'll never see their parents again without offering some serious cuddles.).

 

And now DD wants to know why I'm crying...

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I saw this.

 

But a question: some of those kids are certainly old enough to realize mom and dad should have arrived home by then. Didn't they ask? If the officer didn't lie, what did he say to a direct question. Assuming the parents always were there for Halloween, wouldn't most realized that something was wrong ? Otherwise why would the police be there?

 

Maybe I just feel like the kids will now linkt Halloween with being lied to and a tragic death. But given that there is no possible good outcome for what happened, I think the officer did an amazing job showing humanity to kids who desperately needed it

 

I read several articles on this yesterday and was just looking to see if anything had been posted on the boards.  I can't help but wonder, what if it was someone here?  Maybe no one knows the family IRL, and how would we ever know if all of a sudden a Hive Member just stopped posting?

 

It was inferred that the oldest child had an inkling but was able to lead the younger children to go along with the officer.  The oldest child did not know for sure (because no one told him), but that he obviously knew something was up at the time.  (How could you not?)

 

This sort of scenario with both parents dying usually crosses my mind when it's just dh and me in the car.  What a blessing this officer was, and one small bit of goodness came from the response on the Go Fund Me page.

 

 

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How awful.  I feel so very sad for the family.  Praying.

 

As to them not knowing.  They're probably knew, but didn't know how to ask.

 

My maternal grandfather died suddenly when I was about 13yrs old.  My sisters and I were all away on the annual week-long beach trip with our paternal grandparents.   The trip was suddenly cut short, we were piled into the car, and headed back home without explanation.  I remember we were goofing off in the back seat and my grandmother was very sharp with us - something I had never seen happen before.  We *knew* something was up, just not what it was, and somehow it didn't even occur to us to push the topic.

 

I'm pretty sure my mom wanted to be the one to tell us herself so my grandparents were probably under instructions not to say anything.  Must have been hard when we were off having fun and they knew what awaited us when we got home.

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My thoughts are with these poor kids.

 

While I appreciate the sacrifices many make to homeschool I would ask people to consider whether "where/how you go to school" and "whether or not your wonderful parents are alive" are really comparable things to cry about in most cases. It's really not about school. It's about the fact that their loving family was ripped to shreds by a horrible act of fate. :(

 

I will say that every moment their parents had with them, every extra moment, was surely worthwhile.

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My thoughts are with these poor kids.

 

While I appreciate the sacrifices many make to homeschool I would ask people to consider whether "where/how you go to school" and "whether or not your wonderful parents are alive" are really comparable things to cry about in most cases. It's really not about school. It's about the fact that their loving family was ripped to shreds by a horrible act of fate. :(

 

I will say that every moment their parents had with them, every extra moment, was surely worthwhile.

 

I'm guessing she wasn't comparing the two.  Of course the fact that they lost their parents is everything. But when I read that the children were homeschooled, it was something I could connect with and made it hit home more closely.  Usually I can read tragic news stories and remain emotionally distant, but when I can more easily insert myself or my family into the circumstances, it effects me.  (I hope I'm making sense.)

 

And yes, every extra moment, surely worthwhile.  No regrets.

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