Second C-section recovery tips please!

[MrsBasil]

I had an emergency c-section with DS and I'll be having a planned c-section with the upcoming kid that u/s tech says is a girl. I'm about a month away.

 

DS is 2.5. I've had hyperemesis through most of my pregnancy though we seem to have hit upon a combination of medication that is working in the past week we shall see. Anyway, he's already been watching a lot of TV on Netflix and has more and more energy and less and less patience for it.

 

It took me about 8 weeks after my first c-section to feel comfortable doing most household chores and that was with only 1 kid.

 

I need some ideas, tips, and strategies to keep DS happy, keep the house from sliding into grossness, keep us fed, and care for a new baby.

 

DH will do most of the dishes and laundry, help with dinner,and bathe the toddler with no problem. He'll most likely vacuum once a week if the floors stay picked up and he'll try to help with that. He drives a semi filled with flammable material, so I won't be asking for help in the middle of the night unless it's an emergency.

 

My mother has said she'll help me with DS a few times a week, but my mother....is not always reliable and let's leave it at that. I can't count on the fact that she will do what she says or be in any condition to help. Then again, sometimes she surprises me.

 

I'm already nervous about going from 1 to 2 kids and am disappointed I'll also be recovering from surgery at the same time.

 

:bigear:

[ktgrok]

I had an emergency c-section with DS and I'll be having a planned c-section with the upcoming kid that u/s tech says is a girl. I'm about a month away.

 

DS is 2.5. I've had hyperemesis through most of my pregnancy though we seem to have hit upon a combination of medication that is working in the past week we shall see. Anyway, he's already been watching a lot of TV on Netflix and has more and more energy and less and less patience for it.

 

It took me about 8 weeks after my first c-section to feel comfortable doing most household chores and that was with only 1 kid.

 

I need some ideas, tips, and strategies to keep DS happy, keep the house from sliding into grossness, keep us fed, and care for a new baby.

 

DH will do most of the dishes and laundry, help with dinner,and bathe the toddler with no problem. He'll most likely vacuum once a week if the floors stay picked up and he'll try to help with that. He drives a semi filled with flammable material, so I won't be asking for help in the middle of the night unless it's an emergency.

 

My mother has said she'll help me with DS a few times a week, but my mother....is not always reliable and let's leave it at that. I can't count on the fact that she will do what she says or be in any condition to help. Then again, sometimes she surprises me.

 

I'm already nervous about going from 1 to 2 kids and am disappointed I'll also be recovering from surgery at the same time.

:bigear:

 

Well, you could always look into a VBAC, if you are truly not wanting to deal with the surgical recovery. Not trying to start a debate, just mentioning it, because sometimes there is a lot of misinformation about them. If you are interested than http://www.ican-online.org has the info.

 

Otherwise, my suggestions are to hire a post partum doula if at all possible. Or a teen to act as a mother's helper for a few hours a day. I just don't see how you will be up and around to deal with the baby all night, and then the other kids during the day.

 

Do the older kids have a nap time? I'd work on getting a good solid block of time that is nap/quiet time now, so they are used to it when the baby comes. So you can at least rest then. Teach the older ones to pick up toys and put them away for a reward of some kind. Just have a rubbermaid bin in each room for them to put the toys in, then you can sort through them in a month or so when you are more recovered. That way things are picked up at least.

 

Freeze as many meals as you can now. Or ask for meals from friends.

 

HUGS! (from a VBAC mom)

[MrsBasil]

Well, you could always look into a VBAC, if you are truly not wanting to deal with the surgical recovery. Not trying to start a debate, just mentioning it, because sometimes there is a lot of misinformation about them. If you are interested than www.ican-online.org has the info.

 

 

HUGS! (from a VBAC mom)

 

Snipped by me.

 

Thank you. I've talked extensively with my providers, CNM who work with 2 OBs in a practice, and based on health and insurance issues a VBAC is not an option for me.

 

I know you don't wish to start a debate, but I just state that a VBAC is off the table and am looking for tips to deal post surgery.

 

I don't have the funds to hire any kind of help at this time. I should be getting dinners from my MOPS group though! I forgot about that. :D

[cjzimmer1]

Well I had 2 csections (before having 3 VBAC's) and let me tell you they were like 2 different surgeries. The first I was barely moving for weeks, the second the day after surgery, I wheeled my baby to a different floor of the hospital because a friend had given birth to a VERY large baby the same day as me and she couldn't get out of bed, so I went and visited her. I took pain medicines for about 3-4 days after the 2nd and with my first I was on them for several weeks.

 

I'm sure their are exceptions to the rule but generally (from what I remember) the majority of people who have 2 csection report having a much easier time with the 2nd. I honestly have no idea why that might be. I had had an open gallbladder removal a few years prior to my first kid so I was very familiar with having major abdominal surgery and the first was still a killer. Maybe the nerves are already deadened in the area from the first surgery, I don't know but the recovery was so much easier, I had no problems taking care of 2 kids after the 2nd c-section but couldn't even take care of myself after the first.

[DawnM]

My 2nd C-section was much easier to recover from. The first was emergency after about 20 hours of labor.

 

The second was planned and was a walk in the park compared to the first!

[hana]

If you use homeopathics, consider taking Arnica as soon as possible after the c-section and for the following 24 hours or so. If you don't use homeopathics, you might google this one and consider it. It won't interfere with allopathic medication, and I think it made my recovery much more easy than it might have otherwise been.

[scrapbookbuzz]

My first was an emergency C-section and my 2nd was a planned C-section. The planned C-section is MUCH easier in regards to recovery. You may still be sensitive around that area for the same amount of time but you should notice that you have more energy than you did the first time around. And, as the pp said, pain meds you don't need quite as long.

[eloquacious]

I wanted a VBAC for #2, but his Superman-out-of-the-womb, arm first routine ruined that for me. Sigh.

 

In that case, I found that the best thing was that we had trained our older son (who was 24 months when he became an older brother) to sleep in his "big boy bed," aka his converted crib which was now a toddler bed. We had done it earlier rather than later because we already knew we'd be traveling to Europe that summer and needed him to be able to sleep in a bed. When I had the second Cesarean I was SO grateful because I realized that I would never have been able to lift him up into a crib!!

 

Also, he had recently started to climb into his own booster chair and car seat, and that was major for us (he was a bit of a late climber, compared to his friends).

 

So I suppose in addition to recovery stuff (TAKE THE MEDS... I didn't after the hospital with #1 and was more or less fine, not so much the second time around), I'd say encourage as much independence physically for #1 as you can. Lifting will be really hard for a while. We "hugged" by having him stand on the couch or his bed. I read to him while nursing #2 and he sat right next to me on the couch...not as close as on my lap, but good enough for the time being.

 

I slept the first... 4? 5? nights in a chair, with the baby. I had him propped up and secured, but I couldn't have gotten up from a bed to nurse him, our bed is far too low.

[eloquacious]

My first was an emergency C-section and my 2nd was a planned C-section. The planned C-section is MUCH easier in regards to recovery. You may still be sensitive around that area for the same amount of time but you should notice that you have more energy than you did the first time around. And, as the pp said, pain meds you don't need quite as long.

 

This is what I'm hoping for #3, when the time comes. Because both of my previous Cesareans were preceded by 2-3 days of laboring and not sleeping... at least with a planned C, I'd hopefully be less "beat up," and wouldn't have had to take Pitocin before. The swelling that caused was one of the nastiest recovery "issues" I had!

[ClassicCole]

Just wanted to say that I have had multiple c-sections and one vbac. I had a long recovery from my vbac, lots of complications. After my first c-section the recovery period was much shorter with the others.

 

Tips would be just pace yourself. Let things go a bit. Take breaks often. Make up a some meals in advance. Simple meals are best. Take out can be good too. Ask for help from family and friends. You can't do it all. Just enjoy those first few weeks with that baby. Housework will always be there. Our babies grow up too quickly.

 

Get some special movies, books and/or games for ds. That way when baby is napping you can spend some quality one on one time with ds.

[Stayseeliz]

I also found each section easier. My second was planned because DD1 was breech, third was due to preeclampsia and fourth was due to early labor/bp issues, etc. Really each section recovery has gotten easier since I knew they were coming, etc. With my fourth I dragged myself into the NICU four hours after surgery.

 

Just let things go and enjoy your new baby!! You will have time to get things in order as she gets older!

[newlifemom]

My best tips are:

 

1. take your pain meds. The less pain you are in, the sooner you can get up and get around. The more you get up and get around, the sooner you heal. Do not get behind b/c it is that much harder to catch up. [Ask me how I know. :glare:]

 

2. [This is just me and after not seeing my 1st child for 2 days. She went to a different hospital.] Let the nurses take care of your dd. I nursed all of my children, even the first who was bottle fed for the 1st 8 days of her life. Sleep at night, let them feed her. Do not room with her. You need to rest as you said, you will not have much help once you get home.

 

3. If anyone [even acquaintances] ask how they can help, tell them. [bathrooms do not clean themselves. Little toddlers need to be played with. Laundry needs to get done.]

 

 

My mom came out for my first 3 children. She did not for the 4th. People asked how they could help and I sucked it up and told them. A dear friend came over and cleaned my bathtub for me. People brought meals, and better yet, cold cuts and salads. [less heating up for me to do]

 

I have had 4 c-sections and truthfully, I recovered well and quickly with each of them. I think the main thing that helped was rest, meds, and help. I didn't have my dd for the first 8 days of her life and at the time it was awful. In hindsight, I slept much better, [got up once a night to pump] and was able to take care of things. With the others, I had learned that bonding doesn't have to happen in the hospital. It does happen even if they aren't in your room, and that the most important thing for me to do was rest for when I was home. My doctor was the one who told me to not try to be brave and to take the meds. I left the hospital with a bottle of vicodin each baby and by 4 days out, I was no longer taking them.

 

This is what worked for me. I hope you have the best delivery possible. :001_smile:

[chepyl]

If you can't afford to hire someone to help out a few hours a day, check with your Moms group, or your church. A church might have some sort of after care ministry or a senior women's group that just likes to help out. The church I grew up in had a group of older women who would sit in your house during a funeral and make sure there was warm food ready when you returned. I am sure they would have happily sat with a new mom to help after surgery/childbirth. It is a much happier reason for being in someone else's home.

 

Get some new toys. Wal-Mart generally has a large selection of $5 toys and Target's $1 section is amazing. Invest in new coloring books, crayons, watercolors, playdough...yes, it may be messy...but DH can clean the mess up ;) Get some new movies or computer games. Anything that will allow your older child to play independently for a while. I don't know how old your child is, but my 3 year old can play with playdough or color for HOURS!!

[wormbuy]

My 2nd section was planned, and the recovery was much better than my first (unplanned). So, in addition to what has already been said...remember not to over-do it if you are feeling better than you expect. For example, I switched the laundry from the washer to the dryer because I felt fine, but I really should not have. Let things go that can be let go, let DH do what he can and don't feel like you need to do housework type stuff even if you feel you could. Snuggle with the 2 year old and cuddle your newborn and rest as much as possible....Congrats!

[WiseOwlKnits]

I've had Hyperemesis for 3 pregnancies now so :grouphug:

 

I had planned c/s with my first (DD flipped breech at 38 weeks) and the recovery was awful. I ended up with an infection and my incision came back open. I couldn't pick up DD or put her in her crib until she was 3 months old because of issues with the c/s.

 

I had a planned c/s with my DS (I planned for a VBAC, but hit 42+2 without going into labor my OB doesn't induce VBACs) and the recovery was a breeze compared to the first. I was still moving slow, but I was able to take care of DD and DS within a week or so of his birth. Everyone I know who has had a 2nd c/s has said it was much easier than their first so I think you have a pretty good chance of having a good experience this time. :)

 

I'm having a c/s this time as well since no hospitals around me will allow a VBAC after 2 c/s's. I'm nervous about it and hoping the recovery follows like my 2nd.

[Caitilin]

If you use homeopathics, consider taking Arnica as soon as possible after the c-section and for the following 24 hours or so. If you don't use homeopathics, you might google this one and consider it. It won't interfere with allopathic medication, and I think it made my recovery much more easy than it might have otherwise been.

 

I am a 3VBA2C mom, and I totally second the arnica. It is truly amazing stuff. :grouphug: you're in the home stretch!

 

I would also add that, yes, take advantage of the nursery while in the hospital--you can have babe brought to you during the night for nursing, but let them keep her part of the night so you can sleep. It is worth it to get those extra couple of hours! :D

Edited September 19, 2011 by Caitilin

[WiseOwlKnits]

double post

Edited September 19, 2011 by Hill Country Classical Academy

[linguistmama]

A friend of mine had a PP doula who was still in training and was free because of that. If you already know that people will be bringing you food could they also help out a little while they are there? Like take the toddler outside for 1/2 an hour or load the dishwasher etc?

[Maus]

My best tips are:

 

1. take your pain meds. The less pain you are in, the sooner you can get up and get around. The more you get up and get around, the sooner you heal. Do not get behind b/c it is that much harder to catch up. [Ask me how I know. :glare:]

 

2. [This is just me and after not seeing my 1st child for 2 days. She went to a different hospital.] Let the nurses take care of your dd. I nursed all of my children, even the first who was bottle fed for the 1st 8 days of her life. Sleep at night, let them feed her. Do not room with her. You need to rest as you said, you will not have much help once you get home.

 

3. If anyone [even acquaintances] ask how they can help, tell them. [bathrooms do not clean themselves. Little toddlers need to be played with. Laundry needs to get done.] :001_smile:

I second 1 and 3 completely, though I did room with my second C-section baby (the first was put on an antibiotic and stayed in the NICU until she was off). Having younger DD room in was actually a comfort to me, as my son got so sick at the sitters that DH and I reluctantly decided the best thing was for Daddy to take the two olders home and look after them. I was really lonely without him, so having baby there really helped emotionally. I did send her to the nursery for half the night one night so I could sleep.

 

Moving really helps the recovery and pain meds make the moving possible. Also that trick where you hold a pillow across the incision when you sneeze, cough, or laugh.

[milovany]

I second (third?) the teen girl to be your helper -- do you know any? Daughters of friends? I have a dear friend who's girls have done this and I know it's been a huge blessing to the mothers!! They can come in for a couple of hours 2-3 days a week, if possible, to help with the things you're just not getting to. And say YES to any and all meal offers. If people ask how they can help and you can't think of anything, ask if they'll double one of the dinners they're making for their family this week and bring you a meal.

 

:grouphug: to you! I can't believe it's getting so close.

[Food4Thought]

1. take your pain meds. The less pain you are in, the sooner you can get up and get around. The more you get up and get around, the sooner you heal. Do not get behind b/c it is that much harder to catch up. [Ask me how I know. :glare:]

 

 

:iagree: This was my very first thought, and I know this from experience as well.

 

My 2nd, like many other posters, was MUCH easier than my 1st. I felt fabulous, actually. They even let me out of the hospital early. Hopefully you'll experience the same kind of recovery. But still - Don't Overdo It!!

 

One of my favorite routines when I added my 2nd was to read books to the 1st when she was napping/nursing. Another mom gave me that suggestion, and it worked wonders. DS did not get jealous because he still had special time for him, even if I was occupied with the baby. We read I'm a Big Brother quite often to get him used to how to care for a baby. DS was barely 2 at the time, but he loved this book.

 

Oh, and have someone stay with you at the hospital who can change the baby, bring her to you to nurse, or whatever else. My mom did this job for me, and even though she was exhausted, it was a HUGE help during those first 2 days in the hospital.

[MrsBasil]

Thank you all for your replies! There's a lot of good ideas that I can make happen.

 

Since my first c-section was preceded by being in the hospital for 2 days, multiple rounds of induction, still having hyperemesis, and exhaustion I am really hoping that having a planned one will make a difference for me like it did for so many of you.

 

DS is in a big boy bed already and one of those kids who always wants to help and is very independent...a little too much sometimes, but I think I can work with his personality and get along well while we transition to having 2 kids.

 

I feel much better about handling this. Thanks so much to everyone who replied.

[dangermom]

I'm sure your second section will be much easier. Not having to go through all the awfulness first is a huge help.

 

My older daughter got potty-trained just before I had #2; I think that helped a lot. I half-expected her to regress, though.

[catz]

My 2nd section was a breeze to recover from compared to the first. I was doing regular activities at 2 weeks PP.

[Orthodox6]

Sensible, useful advice already posted! (so let me add a hearty Congratulations on the baby!)

 

Personal view here is that the skill of the doctors impacts the speed/quality of recovery. The same OBs delivered my three sons, all via c-section. Every time, I was up doing household chores the day after returning home. . . . The doctors who delivered my dd, however, were horrible -- starting right off with the anesthesiologist, who botched two epidurals in a row, then gave me a third one that wore off prior to surgery. The recovery from that birth differed markedly from the previous ones!

 

Accept help from any friendly source that offers.

 

Enjoy your beautiful baby!

[MariannNOVA]

My 2nd, 3rd and 4th sections were planned (the first was an emergency) and the recovery with the subsequent ones was quite uneventful and easier than with the first.

 

Every time, when I was able, I made it a point to be off my feet when I could -- if any of the kids was resting or sleeping, or we could be confined to one room where I could be off my feet and the littles were kept busy - that's what I did.

 

Not going up and down stairs was a big help, and not driving or riding in a car except for mandatory doctor's visits was huge.

 

After the 4th (twins) I was on bedrest for a couple of weeks as I had trouble with bleeding - that made me have to be compliant and it was an easy recovery.

 

We tried to have dh make lunches etc and keep them in a little fridge we set up on the 2nd floor of our home (he made a pantry of sorts in a walk in closet) - that way I didn't have to move around alot to do much. Meals were made in advance and frozen and neighbors (bless them) had a dinner thing set up and for the first four weeks with the twins, no one had to even think about meals.

 

HTH

[barbarajon]

I feel a planned c-section is always easier than an emergency one. I think you should be able to manage with DH at home during the day, though it might be a little tough on him. Is it possible for him to take two weeks off from his work? To help your c-section recovery, try to move about as soon as you’re able – even a short walk around the house will help you get back on your feet more quickly. All the best! I’m sure things will go fine. It’s amazing how older siblings suddenly become “more responsibleâ€!