How did your educational experience affect your attitude & approach to homeschooling

[IsabelC]

I'm interested to know what kind of early educational background members have? And how does this play out in the decisions you now make for your dc? Are you going for classical (or classical influenced) home schooling because you were educated like this and loved it? Because this is the sort of education you didn't have but would like to have had? Or does your schooling (or not) not have anything much to do with it?

[Liz CA]

I'm interested to know what kind of early educational background members have? And how does this play out in the decisions you now make for your dc? Are you going for classical (or classical influenced) home schooling because you were educated like this and loved it? Because this is the sort of education you didn't have but would like to have had? Or does your schooling (or not) not have anything much to do with it?

 

I attended a school where Latin and two other foreign languages were mandatory beside the usual science and history cores.

I was bored in those class in which I excelled (languages) and almost could not keep up with math because progressively deteriorating myopia was not diagnosed and I could not see much on the board. Curiously, this didn'nt hamper my progess in languages but I was not a natural with numbers and would have needed all the clues I could get.

I wish I had been homeschooled (this was not legal in the area where I grew up) because I could have proceeded at a faster pace with my language studies and taken the extra time and more tutoring with math. Because my math grades became worse as I moved up through High School (obviously a combination of having missed or misunderstood some of the basics and felt completely lost by the time I hit Algebra II) I was not able to pursue my interest in some of the science classes which required a fair amount of algebra. Unfortunately, I developed severe math phobia where I was almost physically ill before tests. This did not help matters at all.

 

Once my myopia was diagnosed (I really did not notice much myself until it became so bad that I realized I was the only one who could not see as far as the others and then for some inexplicable reason I was afraid to tell my mother???!!!) and my visual acuity restored, I took math all over in college - beginning at Basic Algebra through Algebra II and while it will never be a subject that interests me intensely, I earned an A- for my final grade.

 

This would simply never have happened to my homeschooled ds. I am glad I was able to overcome this math phobia and finally understand it as it obviously helped me immensely to teach my son years later but I am also a little sad that several years in High School I was so terrified of anything math that I could not even concentrate enough to perform the simplest of calculations when called upon by teachers. I have pretty much followed a classical curriculum as outlined in the earlier edition of the "Well Trained Mind." This curriculum resonated well with me because it included studies in languages (especially Latin which I found to be very beneficial) and logic as well as math and science.

 

I wish homeschooling was legal in every country. There will always be some children whose life and academic progress would be drastically changed - for the better.

 

Edited October 12, 2009 by Liz CA

[usetoschool]

My schooling was a total waste of time. I was always in accelerated classes and gifted programs, blah, blah, blah but everything was so superficial and public schoolish. I spent 13 years getting A's and have learned more homeschooling than I ever learned in public school. Part of it might have been the time period I went to school. I spent a lot of time talking about feelings in open, experimental classes in the 70's in California :glare:

 

As I result I have been focused on teaching my kids whys and how things connect - deeper and exciting and memorable aha moments (hopefully). And classical learning appeals to me as a rebellion against that whole open classroom, child led learning thing I was subjected to. ::shudder::

[swellmomma]

My schooling was not very good. I struggled with some issues back then (if my parents had been astute enough they would have realized that starting in 5th grade I was dealing with depression). I was a bright student, but a perfectionist. After reaching 79% every year and thereby missing out on the honor roll, enrichment classes and such, I simply gave up doing anything. In my mind I figured what was the point to miss it by 1 lousy percent year after year.

 

I had teachers that bullied the students, was bullied by the kids constantly and had far too much on my plate at home(age 8 doing most of the household chores, age 9 responsible for caring for my siblings afterschool, age 11 working everyday after school in a daycare center as a volunteer, then coming home at 6 eating dinner and heading out for my paid babysitting jobs, I worked right through high school graduation like this, only once 15 my daycare job became a paid position).

 

Realistically I would have excelled homeschooling, I prefered to work on my own and taught myself grade 12 chemistry in high school (I hated the teacher so never went but did well enough on my diploma exam to pass the course with that being my only grade). I read voraciously and still do, but could not connect with other kids, and hated being in school with every ounce in me.

 

I can not separate the academics, from the social side, from my home life back then to say any 1 part of it influences my decision to homeschool or the way I approach things more than the rest. It is all part of the bigger picture of what I wanted for my kids. I did try ps with them initially due to circumstance and was really hopeful that what I went through was the exception not the rule, but in their short time in ps I was proven wrong in that regard. I figure my kids have enough strikes against them (single parent home, poor, disbilities) they need me to provide the best environment for growing and learning I can give them. They don't need to be put through what I was in my public school years academically or socially.

[Rosy]

I don't think it did all that much. I had a better-than-average public school education (gifted and challenge classes all the way through) and a great experience with our high school marching band. I think that my experience actually makes me think that public schools are better than they are. When I talk to my husband about his experience, it was much different. He struggled more than I did and really fell through the cracks.

 

I will say that even with as good as an education as I had, I still remember very little world history, I don't think I finished most of the books we read (though many of them were quality literature), science was hit-and-miss depending on the teacher, PE was a joke. I also didn't come away with a sense of my strengths as a learner or an individual and didn't finish college because I couldn't see going into debt without knowing what it was for. That's not necessarily my school's fault, but it has shaped my goals for homeschooling.

 

Mostly, though, I homeschool because as a young adult I met some homeschooling families that were achieving what I want to achieve with my kids. Their (the kids') spiritual foundation was strong from years studying Scripture and having it reinforced as they lived their lives, and I appreciated the academic freedom the families had (all were high achievers and were able to tailor their program to their strengths).

 

Even now, my kids are far from where I want them to be, but I keep in mind that we are laying a foundation for them to be able to have what I've seen in so many other families.

[Rosie_0801]

The major flaws in my education were a lack of chronology in history, we jumped topics here and there and repeated the same three to death nearly; and a lack of critical thinking and writing training. We did exercises that were supposed to teach us, but we were never deliberately instructed in what to do and why, just marked wrong if we didn't. This is why WTM appeals so much to me.

 

Rosie

[tex-mex]

- We were dirt poor. Barely could afford a pair of pants to wear for the first day of school. My family were the oddballs in our town. From 7th-9th grades, we had no electricity or hot water in our home -- I studied by candlelight and felt out of it when kids talked about Happy Days on TV. I remember babysitting and secretly bringing my laundry in a knapsack to wash while the parents went out on a date. (They thought I brought books to study. LOL) My childhood education was not good. I grew up in a small farming town with a school district that had a poor budget and limited choices. I was an honor roll student in junior high and B average in high school. But never heard of the SATs or stuff like that. My mother was a single parent (she dropped out of school in the 10th grade) and not involved with my education. I recall being told by the High School counselor that I was not "college material" due to my coming from a low income/single parent/minority profile. She told me to think of clerical skills. That made me very mad. I made a vow to find a way to get into college and kick down every "door" in my way. I remember visiting a college while in high school and seeing the whole world open up for me with possibility. I made sure I was going to get to that goal. No one helped me early in high school with advice. I was so lost and needing direction. One teacher helped by telling me about how to apply to college and wrote a letter of recommendation -- and I'll be forever in their debt. I was the first in my entire family (cousins, aunts, uncles, etc) to go to college and earn a B.A and go to graduate school. Looking back on my experience, I now focus with my son the skills I never had to prepare him for college.

 

- As a teacher in the public schools, I loved teaching students who had difficulties in the regular classroom environment. Kids who "fell in the cracks" and did not qualify for extra remedial help or special education. I became a strong advocate telling parents of their rights and many times got in hot water with the school district for showing parents how to circumvent the system and get their child help. I never liked the system nor the NCLB policy that makes schools teach to the test.

 

- We homeschool due to health reasons. Son was in a private school and still would be had he not been in a coma back in 2003. Diagnosed with a rare genetic disease -- simple cold or flu can hospitalize. Son qualified for a homebound tutor via his IEP we created after the coma showed (via a Clinical Pediatric Neurologist test) there were some cognitive issues and co-morbidities of the disease. Personally, I saw what the tutor was doing with my son and said, "I can do that!" -- and began afterschooling him. The following year, we dropped the tutor and I began to homeschool full time. Ironically, I had to adjust my style of teaching -- I taught at a classical Charter School with a rigorous curriculum. (Try teaching that to a special needs Asperger's kid just recovering from a coma... LOL) Sonny boy learns best in an electic environment.

 

SIDENOTE: I thank God for my past teaching experience and exposure to many different modalities of learning -and curriculum- to be able to modify and accomodate for my son's needs. He knew that all of my past experience would be put to use for my son. If you asked me 10 years ago if I would homeschool, I would have called you crazy. Today, I love homeschooling! God can work miracles! :D

 

P.S. While teaching at the classical Charter School, it was then that I realized HOW RIPPED OFF MY CHILDHOOD EDUCATION WAS. LOL I wish I had Saxon Math and so much more... yeesh. So much for my education. I think I learned more teaching and homeschooling compared to my childhood. Meh.

Edited October 12, 2009 by tex-mex

[Reya]

I was bored stiff and utterly miserable. Angry, embittered, and chafing for something more substantive. School was way too little, way too late for me. And I had a better K-12 education than apparently 99.9% of students, since the "best high schools in America" look more normal than impressive next to my school.

[Harriet Vane]

I had a very, very negative public school experience, and a very positive private school experience.

 

My family moved a lot, so I was in five different school districts before high school. Some were better than others. Each and every district I was in contained both wonderful and nightmarishly bad teachers--I am grateful to the handful that I remember as wonderful. The others made everyday life very hard on their students. For example, my first grade teacher was a screamer. You just never knew when she would lose her temper. There were even occasions wherein she would decide to scream at a student and tell the rest of us to put our heads down on our desks so she could let it rip on that poor student--we all lived in fear of her anger.

 

Socially public school was mostly very, very negative for me, though there were some bright spots. On the whole though, as a brainy kid with thick glasses and outdated hand-me-down clothes, I was a target.

 

My private school experience was radically different. I went to an academically rigorous Christian school. I thrived on the academic challenge. Every single teacher I had at that school was kind, and some were wonderfully loving and emotionally generous. Socially it was also a wonderful place for me. I was absolutely never bullied there despite some hardships in my life. I found friends and acceptance, and still enjoy catching up with those friends on a yearly basis.

 

The result has been that I am deeply suspicious of public schools. If I had to, I know I could make that choice work better for my kids than it did for me, but I have no desire to work with that system. I perceive it as deeply dysfunctional, arbitrary, and renders those within it powerless and impotent.

 

I struggle, though, with whether or not to put my children in a private high school like the one I attended. My time there was so rich. My only real concern with it is that it takes up ALL a student's time, and I also worry that even a great school still creates a somewhat artificial social environment.

[CookieMonster]

How did your educational experience affect your attitude & approach to homeschooling?

 

In many, many ways. I'm not sure I'm even cognizant of them all

 

jcooperetc, I love your sig line! In that spirit I'm just going to sum up as best I can.

 

My education was always very important to my mother. Not that she necessarily approached everything in the right way. But, in the end I knew education=important. I always assumed I would be attending college (until I hit that mid-highschool stage when I realized I had lots of options). I definitely carry the 'education=important' philosophy with me. I absolutely feel that with hard work I can provide a superior education to ps.

 

As a child growing up in ps, I felt the lack of ability of the ps to uphold high moral standards. I do not hate ps. I would use one if I had too. But I get immense satisfaction from knowing that my child doesn't have to know too much too soon.

 

So my social and academic experiences in public school influenced my decision to homeschool.

[Seeker]

My decision to homeschool was simply following my Lord's leading. My own school experiences was a mixture, but mostly after third grade I was bored with how things had to be presented and I never understood the whole "socialization" thing going on there--I believe we called it "popularity" and "staying away from the mean kids." Because of that, I was not concerned about the "s" word at all when it came to homeschooling.

 

I had the confidence to homeschool, because I always enjoyed teaching and learning. I even felt many times that school got in the way of my real education or was not enough. I think my own education, which is unending, is being served far better now that I am homeschooling.

 

I am using a classical approach because it is the most logical, well-rounded, and well-connected approach overall. Even though my daughter is a random learner and I have to randomize the presentation a bit, she responses quite well with it; she is just a classical and quite an artsy kind of girl--almost like a young "renaissance man." I did not want to have a "fill in the blank" education, but one that inspired her and prepared her so she would have the skills to bring what she imagines into reality.

[Snickerdoodle]

 

I had the confidence to homeschool, because I always enjoyed teaching and learning. I even felt many times that school got in the way of my real education or was not enough. I think my own education, which is unending, is being served far better now that I am homeschooling.

 

 

This pretty much sums it up for me.

[radiobrain]

I went to a progressive private school (my mother, my brothers and I were all scholarship students) that was 14 year JK-12, 800 kids. The education, on the whole, was great... the whole "concept" of the school was to teach kids to *think*, almost everything was essay, we had to take special classes before any standardized test as I don't think anyone had ever given a multiple choice test before.

 

Anyway, academically it was pretty decent, but socially OH MY!!! If I still lived in Chicago, I would have the option of sending my kids there and I absolutely would not. Now, if I KNOW that I wouldn't send my kids to an academically good school, where I would know what pitfalls my kids would be exposed to etc... why would I send them to another school that I know nothing about? I had no choice but to HS. I know that my school experience would have been better if my parents weren't fully supportive of my every whim, follow your bliss types (one of the reasons I cannot fully endorse unschooling) and if I were given a bit more actual guidance.

 

so, my schooling has directly effected my decision to HS. I believe that a lot of the garbage that goes on in school is not necessary, and I can keep my children from being emotionally damaged in the ways that I was. Also, the curriculum is not good enough in my opinion. My kids will have different problems ( as HS will create some I am sure) but at least I will be aware of them... not clueless like my parents, and hopefully I can get them through the puberty years w/o too much horror and self-loathing. Once they have exited the other side of hormones, they should be more secure in themselves and be able to make better decisions. It is my job to get them there with the least amount of damage.

 

CAn you tell that I had a HORRIFIC middle school?

 

Picture, odd girl... academically ahead of everyone, a full year younger than everyone, scholarship student (ie, not stinking rich- and I mean SERIOUSLY rich), etc etc. Until 3rd grade it wasn't so bad, but after that....

[cdrumm4448]

I grew up in a northern suburb of Chicago. My parents moved out of Chicago when I was three to give us a better life, so we found ourselves in the country. Well, one of the first subdivisions in the country! Anyway, I went to public elementary school as my parents couldn't afford Catholic school at the time, and I'm not even sure where the closest Catholic school was to where we lived. So, through 8th grade I went public. It was the 70s, so we didn't have any accelerated classes so I was bored. I would have spent all day reading, if I could have. I actually remember my father asking me why I didn't want to go outside to play one day on the weekend, and I told him I was busy reading. I felt like my real interests were being served out of school, not in school.

 

High school I went to a Catholic all-girls school about 30 minutes away. I took the local high school bus to the local public school, then too another bus to my high school. It took much longer than 30 minutes, but what's a kid to do? I had a very hard time in high school as most of the other girls went to Catholic elementary school together from Kindergarten and they refused to be friends with anyone new. So, I struggled socially. I had some friends (one still to this day) but I didn't enjoy it. So, when I had kids I was certain they would end up where they began; no school switching for any reason. I enrolled my son in Catholic preschool and he stayed there for four years. Then, he begged me to homeschool him because it was "too boring". His love of learning began to fade and so after a lot of consideration, planning, and a dry run, we began homeschooling this year. It's the best decision I've ever made about anything.

 

So, in a nutshell, my education was boring and sufficient, but nowhere near what it could have been. It was the 70s, so even if I had said anything to my parents they would have told me to be quiet and do what I was told (my parents were very "children should be seen and not heard".)

 

The funny part is now you can't shut me up. They don't know what happened to me.

[angela in ohio]

I had a fabulous education in a small town public school. I also see some great things in some schools around here. I am not homeschooling as a reaction to the public schools.

 

I had Latin and a Great Books course, along with two intensive grammar courses, during junior high and high school. I also had a full-year Great Books course my freshman year at a public university. Those inspired me to seek out a classical education for my dc. I see what an effect having that broad background and solid skills has had on my life.

 

I think the biggest influence to homeschool was my parent's model of a lifetime love of learning, coupled with concerns about the social and political situations in public schools.

[WishboneDawn]

I went to public school and have my grade 12. When I was younger my parents pulled us out of school in early spring so we could travel across Canada two years in a row and I think that laid the foundation for my comfort with unschooling.

 

But I also swing to something more structured and it's probably from my own sense of having missed something by not going to university.

 

The more comfortable I get with my own knowledge and intellect then the more laid back I tend to get with the kids' education.

[tdeveson]

I had a dismal education from the public school system in South Florida. Of the dozens of teachers who taught me, I remember one or two as good teachers. I didn't actually have a good education until I started college and have been self-educating ever since then.

 

When it was time to educate my children it was a no-brainer. I wouldn't send a dead dog to public school in Miami. (Although if I sent a live dog, it might be dead soon enough. Children kill each other with breathtaking regularity in Miami schools.)

[MeaganS]

I went to a grand total of 11 schools K-12 in 6 different states. I think that this gave me a unique perspective on public schools. Of those, I would only say that 3 were "good". And two of those were not standard public schools (charter school, experimental science/math boarding school). So that puts only 1 school as "good". The rest varied from mediocre to really poor in quality. When I think back to elementary and middle school, the first emotion that I remember is boredom. Even as a kid I realized that school was remarkibly inefficient. I was in all the gifted classes, etc, but I really don't feel like that did anything except make school more fun. I don't think I learned much more than any of the other kids. I remember as a kid wanting to homeschool because I wouldn't have to sit around and wait for the other kids. For example, in 8th grade, I read The Three Musketeers in 6 days entirely during school after I finished assignments.

 

My parents always tried to help us as best as they knew how. They allowed me to try experimental schools and graduate early. This is what started me thinking outside of the normal educational "box".

 

I don't want my kids to have to waste so much of their childhoods sitting around being bored. I feel like I can give them a good education much more efficiently.

[Bee]

I took college courses for my degree where at least half the courses were self-study and practical experience. and I loved that. High school was boring. I felt like I wasn't really learning anything new, just reviewing what I had learned in previous grades. As a child, I lived with my grandparents who supplemented our ps education with tons of books,games, and learning "manipulatives" of the Montessori sort.I can remember more of what I learned at home than I can from school. After I had children and was considering their educations I thought about all that and it seemed like hsing was the closest to that practical experience, self study, lots of books, and discussions that we felt might lead to better education. Dh was a "problem" student who got in tons of trouble in school because he was bored. He did well in the classes he was interested in though. I too, was bored in school but I did just well enough to pass with B's mostly. If I'd tried harder I could have done better but there seemed to be little point to it.

[abbeyej]

I was home schooled for k-8. Then 9th in a private school and 10th and 11th in a public International Baccalaureate school. I was offered a scholarship in my junior year, so I skipped my senior year and went straight off to college.

 

Every step along the way had pros and cons, though overall I think I had a very positive schooling experience. Lots of individualized attention in the younger years. Some good teachers (some not) and some severe boredom in high school. Great opportunities (many of which I squandered, sigh) in college...

 

Dh and I both had the opportunity to have *glimpses* of what a classical education would be, and we knew that's what we wanted for our own kids. We both felt that our Latin and Greek, while useful, was too little, too late. We wanted strong math and language skills for our kids... We didn't necessarily plan to home school our kids (even though I was home schooled), though once we began to consider more carefully, we didn't see any other options that could measure up.

[Caribbean Queen]

I had a tenured, union activist high school History "teacher" who taught us diddlydoodle. I will do better with my kids.

 

Had to write incipid papers in 2nd grade on what kind of flower I would be if I could be a flower. I couldn't spell and I didn't want to be a flower. Made me cry. Not going there.

 

We don't need to know how to spell, write neatly or do arithmetic so much anymore since we have computers right? :glare: Not.

 

Literally went crying to the teacher in college because I couldn't write a paper. Will prepare my children to write better than I was.

 

Took 6 years of foreign language and can't speak a lick of it. I don't want to offend all you classical educators, but I don't see the benefit of doing bookwork in a foreign language. I didn't really learn anything. It was a waste of time. I might as well of stood outside the market every Saturday morning and picked up a few phrases. I want my kids regulary around native speakers, so they can really learn Spanish, but I haven't worked out how that is going to happen yet.

[JenneinCA]

I had a horrible time in k-8, church school does not mean that everything is wonderful. Bullying from students, bullying from teachers, and a blind eye from everyone else. "You should be happy to be there." I wasn't happy.

 

I finally got out of that in Ninth grade and into public school. The teachers mostly left me alone. The students mostly left me alone. It was a huge improvement. Educationally, k-8 was awful both because I had awful teachers and because the bullying made it hard to learn. Grades 9-12 were much better on the bullying front and the teaching was better in some classes than others.

 

I am definitely homeschooling because of my experiences. I would much rather have my kids go to public high school than any sort of church or private school. Just because people pay the big bucks doesn't mean it is worth it.

[Desert Rat]

I think my lack of knowledge in the classics really drew me to Classical education. I didn't know who Plato was until college. I didn't know anything about mythology but the very, very basic. I didn't learn any world history or geography (the teacher I had for that subject was a WWII buff so that's all we learned that semester). What history I did learn was a mish-mosh of different times and cultures all out of order and I had no idea how it all fit together.

With SOTW, I am learning so much and filling in holes-and I have a college degree. I think my boys are getting a much more linear education. It makes more sense and builds up instead of just throwing blocks at them and hoping they can fit them all together.

FWIW, I thought my public education was okay. I wasn't thrilled with English but that was always my subject and the teachers didn't promote free thinking.

I think my education had everything to do with the paths I've chosen for my boys.

[Cammie]

This thread is very, very interesting!

 

I grew up in a house that valued education over everything. I went public school in NYC until 6th grade. At that point my parents wanted to put me in a Waldorf school and I wanted to continue into the drug and gun infested public junior high. I did not want to go to the "gardening school" as I thought of the Waldorf. So my parents moved to the suburbs of Boston where I went to public junior high and highschool. Like many of you I felt like a misfit and outsider. My family was always focused on higher education. College visits started very early and so I was focused on the fact that as miserable high school was - it was leading to a great place. And it did! I loved college, did an MA and a JD too. If it was up to me I would still be in school! As it is I won't pay it all off until I hit the lotto!

[Dawn in OH]

I had a less than satisfying experience in the public school system.

 

To begin with, I was shy and quiet, and often got picked on for that. I never felt comfortable in groups. I hated reading aloud, giving oral reports, being called to the black board. I always ended up in tears no matter how hard I tried not to.

 

I grew up in a rich neighborhood and my Dad had the lowest income in that neighborhood, so there was also seem teasing about being the "poor" kid. I never had the right clothes, shoes, etc.

 

Then for the education itself. I excelled in Language Arts and History. I was often bored waiting for the rest of the class to catch up. I was tortured waiting for the "slow readers" to read their paragraphs aloud. I got into trouble for reading ahead. When I stopped reading ahead I got into trouble for daydreaming.

 

At some point, probably around 8th grade, I began having difficulty with math. My 8th grade Math teacher was wonderful and did a great job of getting me through it. But when I got to 9th grade, I struggled, fell behind, and couldn't get the help I needed. The tutor assigned to me was useless. The math teacher that promised extra help at lunch only talked about Soap Operas and not math. I was doomed to not succeed in math even though I wanted desperately to understand it.

 

In 7th grade I was assigned into French I. I was not given a choice. I wanted to take Spanish which wasn't offered until 9th grade. When I reached 9th grade I was not permitted to drop French and switch to Spanish.

 

I waited anxiously to take Latin, which was only offered to 12th grade students. The year I got to 12th grade they dropped the course.

 

At the end of 11th grade I more than enough credits to graduate and was bored silly in school. Not only was I not permitted to take my 2 required 12th grade courses over the summer and graduate early, I was not permitted to leave campus in 12th grade to take college courses. I had to sit in school the full day, filling my day up with pointless classes other than the 2 required classes.

 

My husband was also bored and not challenged in school. I think it's a shame to waste 13 years of your life the way we did. We could have learned so much more if we had been homeschooled.

 

I definitely think our disappointment in our educations played a part in our decision to homeschool. There were also other important factors involved, but if we had had wonderful experiences in school or received a stellar education, we may not be where we are, doing what we are with the children today.

[Reya]

> I don't want to offend all you classical educators, but I don't see the benefit of doing bookwork in a foreign language.

 

I have a low-high level of fluency in Spanish, so I'll answer this.

 

Writing and seeing things written solidifies and reinforces conversation. It's typically, in a non-immersive setting, much easier to learn first by reading/writing and then gain fluency by speaking.

 

There's not much point to speaking Latin at all, except that it can jumpstart a fluent, nontranslating understanding of it.

 

That said, my PS experience with foreign language was less than ideal. WAY too little practice speaking, so that I was excruciatingly self-conscious in Spanish III and IV. It took a trip to Costa Rica to get rid of most of it.

Edited October 12, 2009 by Reya

[dragons in the flower bed]

Are you going for classical (or classical influenced) home schooling because you were educated like this and loved it? Because this is the sort of education you didn't have but would like to have had?

 

 

I hardly ever like to post about this stuff on a public forum because I adore my dad and I'm thrilled with what he gave me, and, you know, how sharper than a serpent's tooth is an ungrateful child. But the way you phrase these questions is irresistible. I could answer yes to both of these questions. I was public schooled in a "very good" district, then unschooled. But my true education was completely informal, just a side effect of the relationship between my father and his beloved subjects.

 

Public schooling was gawd awful in a thousand ways. The high-rated schools I attended in our well-off neighborhoods on Long Island were horrible places to grow up. The pressure was on. Kids took their stress out on each other, bullying and tormenting each other as a creative outlet. Teachers focused on what we needed to do to get us into the colleges our parents expected us to attend. There was nothing going on in those buildings that you could earnestly label "learning." It was all pushing papers and schmoozing, and dodging the jokes of the higher-ups in the social hierarchy. This was so exhausting that I worried that I would never have any energy left to actually develop new skills and gain new knowledge. I left public school with the impression that this was a system that could not work no matter how dedicated the individuals within it, a system that failed even as it succeeded, getting kids into good colleges and careers but leaving them soulless non-learners in order to do so.

 

My father was always a teaching parent in areas that are classical, and I loved that. My fondest childhood memories include Dad telling the Greek myths at bedtime, pulling out volumes from his shelves to show me how authors were talking to each other, or leading me socratically to some weird conclusion and then deconstructing it just as methodically. Dad influenced my attitude towards nature, demanding respect for it and modeling reverence. This was all an expression of his religion, a pretty Pagan point of view, not an expression of his educational philosophy.

 

When I was unschooled, I spent a lot of time in the woods drawing all the wonders to be found there. I dove head first into the classics with glee. It was never an assignment, but Dad definitely laid the foundational attitude that led to my doing classical/CM stuff during my unschooled time. Dad knew me and his subject matter well, and loved both, and this meant that no matter what was officially going on with regards to my education, there was learning through the relationships. I very definitely chose to homeschool because I wanted to duplicate that for my children.

 

While I vastly preferred it to public school, unschooling was not quite right either. I definitely missed out on things I would have liked to have done when I was a teenager because my dad was trying to stay out of my way and let me figure things out the hard way. Some things were too hard to figure out, and he never stepped in and helped. Ever. He was a hard-nosed stoic and I was expected to be one too. I didn't have the skills or resources or, I believe, developmental capacity to figure some of those things out. Things like talking school admins into letting me sit for the SAT at their public school. Sixteen-year-olds still do sometimes need an adult to be a liason between them and the real world, or at least a mentor to explain how to have a winning conversation in a professional setting. I really felt handicapped as a teen because no one was helping me with stuff that I couldn't figure out. I wouldn't have said that then. I would have echoed my dad and said I needed to cowboy up and make some good learning mistakes.

 

At the same time, I also felt resentful that I was being watched 24/7 for learning opportunities. Sometimes I wished for half an hour in which I knew I would definitely not be asked to integrate any new facts or use my socratic reasoning powers. Why was it okay for him to drill me after a Learning Channel (remember when it was about learning?) documentary but not cool for him to help me get in to those lectures I wanted to attend? It all seemed too arbitrary sometimes. I still feel this way when I talk to unschoolers. What the heck is the difference between counting silverware and doing a workbook page, if your kid wants to do a workbook page for personally meaningful reasons? Yeah, I teach my kids Latin whether they want it or not, but it doesn't feel schooly to me like it does to unschoolers; it feels like real life just as much as, say, laundry. I'm apparently missing some differentiation that everyone else sees about what is school and what is life.

 

Now, don't get me wrong; I would never wish away those years of learning who I was and how to work me, of developing a kind of owner's manual to myself. But I do have a few more burn scars, I think, from what I feel was a much more intense trial by fire than necessary. Plus my dad had some personal issues during those years that I think kept him from realizing I needed more help... but that's more of a family life issue and less of an education issue. Unschooling ended up being too hot or too cold and too rarely just right.

 

Classical homeschooling is my attempt to give my kids what was good from my childhood while saving them from the stuff that stunk.

Edited October 12, 2009 by dragons in the flower bed
conclusion

[Ellie]

I don't think my education had much to do with my decision to homeschool.

 

Mr. Ellie and I decided that our dc would not go to public schools because by the time we had dc, there were significant failures in the public school system, and we wanted our dc to actually get an education for goodness' sake.:tongue_smilie:

 

I took older dd out of a Christian school where she was doing quite well academically but was a wreck personally. It was because of her burn-out issues that I looked into hsing in 1982, and all of John Holt's books and newsletters that I read, which sent me to the dark side--unschooling. Things might have been different if I were as young as most of you and had had time to think about homeschooling before my dc started school in the first place and had such a bad experience, because I like the concept of classical/WTM/etc. As it was, the thought of taking that child out of an uber-structured school where she was burned out and going into something as structured as WTM makes me twitch even now, lo, these many years later.

[Daisy]

I went to private schools where the focus was on very traditional schooling, test scores, yearly standardized tests, etc. NO thinking outside the box allowed.

 

I excelled. Actually I was bored to death. I skipped two grades and graduated valedictorian at 15yo. Talk about being hated and despised by the 18yo I beat out for top scores. Anyway, I was a freak. You don't build lasting friendships when you are 2-3 years younger than your peers. My entire self-worth was wrapped up in academics.

 

Top scores on SATs. Top honors and university degrees. So what. I have never been challenged one minute in any school I've ever gone to. That doesn't mean I'm smart. Basically I know how to play the game.

 

I was determined it would be different for my children. I want them to ENJOY learning for learning sake and not because it is some competitive game and definitely not because their self-worth is wrapped up in the next algebra test score. I want them to be challenged. I want them to build the kind of character that only comes from difficulty. My worst nightmare was my daughter's first grade year in ps when she sat and doodled all day long and cried because she was so bored.

 

I want them to realize there is no dividing line between 7yo and learning or 37yo and learning. Grab a book, explore, exercise your mind, use your hands, learn...your whole life and not because some test is coming down the pike.

Edited October 12, 2009 by Daisy

[elegantlion]

I work to separate my experience in public school from our decision to homeschool. My dh and I both attended large suburban high schools, different years, different sides of the same state, but we had similar experiences. I felt like I fell through the cracks, didn't stand out in any way, and hated going to school. I graduated a semester early just to get out of there. I feel like I received zero guidance through high school from my parents or the school and chose not to go to college because my parents couldn't afford it and no one was helping me find other ways to proceed.

 

We moved in grade school, I was bullied because of my hair of all things, then my parents (love them!) really thought the public school was going to teach us everything we needed to know about things like money, life, etc. :glare: I couldn't be involved in anything because the school was too far away to walk and my dad worked nights, my mom didn't drive and my dad was frugal, frugal, frugal so anything that cost money was just a big hassle.

 

My parents weren't neglectful, they just trusted the system to do something it was not designed to do. I was a good student, top 10% of my class, but I only really learned how to follow directions. I could go on, but you get the gist of it.

 

That being said our reasons to homeschool were economic at first, we couldn't afford private school anymore. My experience does color some of what we do. We work to make sure my ds has the life skills we had to learn the hard way. I also try to make sure he has at least one activity to participate in. Money has been an issue in the past and I started to have visions of my own experience. He has found some passions to pursue and dh and I wholly support those. We are also already discussing college, making the presumption that he will attend and will make sure he gets the opportunities we didn't have.

 

We started with a classical education last year and now school is fun(except for maybe on Mondays but that is whole other post). The learning is fulfilling for ds and myself and I'm actually enjoying school the second time around.

[Brindee]

I went to a grand total of 11 schools K-12 in 6 different states.

Me too!!! Well, except it was only 4 states. That didn't allow for proper learning, I had lots of gaps! Not only that, when I was in 5th grade I ended up with pneumonia, and was very sick. I was out of school for 3 weeks, and when I went back, they'd passed me up in my math skills. I talked with the teacher, and asked for help, but he was too busy and never helped me. So, math went from a subject I liked just fine, to one I dreaded, and was always 2 steps behind everyone else.

 

I had a spotty education, took the GED equivalent when I was 17, and worked full-time for 2 years (starting at age 16) before heading off to college with my peers. I was the first in my family to earn a 4-yr. college degree.

 

The homeschooling came about by God's plan, not mine. I followed His lead, and it's been an amazing experience. Once I started homeschooling I couldn't see EVER sending my kids back to go through the hassles (teasing, bullying, etc., etc.) that I had gone through! Plus when they had problem I could help them through it, then they could move on, confident in their abilities! My kids have excelled in homeschooling, and from what I've seen of the school I would have sent them to for gradeschool and Jr. high, I'm sooo glad they were homeschooled! Even though it was a Christian school, there were many peer and other problems there that we never had to deal with!

[IsabelC]

Wow, thanks for all those different experiences and insightful comments :)

 

Seems a lot of members here found the school work didn't challenge them; that might explain why so many of you have gifted children.

 

I forgot to answer my own question in the OP, so here goes;)

 

My experience was a bit of a mixture, as I did primary school (that's grade 1 through 6) at a local public school, and highschool at an expensive private school.

 

During my public school years, I don't think I learned much at all. I was academically advanced but socially immature. I would estimate that all the stuff I actually learned in those six years could easily have been done in a few months. I also don't think that being in school helped my social skills any, in fact it probably slowed me down even more because I didn't have the option of learning to socialize at my own pace.

 

Starting at private school, the curriculum was certainly a lot more rigorous than before, but still not particularly challenging. The main challenge in my grade 7 year was getting used to a new school with a funny old-fashioned uniform, regular church services (it was a religious school), lots of new rules and lots of rich students.

 

The main things I did not like about my education were:

 

 

• I was never taught to work hard to learn. I coasted along for so long, that when the work got too difficult to get by on natural ability alone, I tended to give up too easily, because I just hadn't learnt to put in a sustained effort on anything. Hence my excellent grades steadily declined, and it wasn't until 4th year of university that I really figured out how to do well based on effort.
  
• There was too much fragmentation of the material covered. Not only were subjects covered in small, seemingly random chunks, but also the educational system in my state went through a lot of fads that led to confused students. Eg in 1st grade I learnt printing handwriting. In second I learned old fashioned cursive. In third it was back to printing. In fourth it was cursive again, but a totally different style to what I'd done the first time. This happened with pretty much every subject (I think my school may have been a pilot/experimental one!)
  
• There was too much extra stuff to deal with. For children who are immature, socially inept and lacking in confidence, the effort required to succeed at doing school takes a substantial chunk out of the energy available for actual academic learning.
  

 

[johnandtinagilbert]

I loved school and was always successful with what was offered. In hindsight, I wasn't offered enough b/c school was too easy and I knew how to play the grades game. Too many times I studied just before a test, memorized, then forgot. Terrible shame. So, I choose this style of education so my dc are ready for anything they choose and have a chance to be Ready for college. I wanted them to be challenged enough to grow...something dh and I didn't really get to do much of in ps.

 

Since I'm thinking about it, I guess college influenced me too, b/c I went from easy-breezy high school to WOW-I-gotta-study college. I don't want the transition to be so drastic for my dc.

 

Really, although we hold those opinions, we started hsing in order to provide the best possible individualized education for dc, to keep them out of a dangerous world (until they were old enough handle situations), and b/c we were pleased with the home schooled families we knew.

 

I came to this style, without knowing it was a style, b/c it made sense and offered the rigor and hands-on I was looking for.

[johnandtinagilbert]

I loved school and was always successful with what was offered. In hindsight, I wasn't offered enough b/c school was too easy and I knew how to play the grades game. Too many times I studied just before a test, memorized, then forgot. Terrible shame. So, I choose this style of education so my dc are ready for anything they choose and have a chance to be Ready for college. I wanted them to be challenged enough to grow...something dh and I didn't really get to do much of in ps.

 

Since I'm thinking about it, I guess college influenced me too, b/c I went from easy-breezy high school to WOW-I-gotta-study college. I don't want the transition to be so drastic for my dc.

 

Really, although we hold those opinions, we started hsing in order to provide the best possible individualized education for dc, to keep them out of a dangerous world (until they were old enough handle situations), and b/c we were pleased with the home schooled families we knew.

 

I came to this style, without knowing it was a style, b/c it made sense and offered the rigor and hands-on I was looking for.

[ciyates]

I went to an excellent, small, public school. If I ever moved home he would attend my old high school (I know it is still up to par because my sister works there).

 

We decided to homeschool because of the problems we had once we moved here.

[radiobrain]

not that any of you care, but I wanted to clarify something....

 

My personal school experience is not the only reason for HSing, but it has definitely solidified my doing it. If my schooling had been all around great, I might not have ended up in this place.

 

I think my first "real" reason had to do with the fact that I come from a family of outside the boxers, the way everyone else doe sit isn't the only way, type of people. I found out recently that my Dad (in the mid sixties) started a group called "The Parent's School" that my older brothers attended until 3rd & 4th grade. Taught by parents, all hippies I believe, because my dad thought that PS destroyed the individual will. He then took my brothers out after a mom brought the kids to a black panther rally (this was Chicago in the late sixties, early 70s) which he thought was bad judgement. Anyway... I obviously have been raised by some sort of rebellious stock.

[Guest RecumbentHeart]

The main things I did not like about my education were:

 

 

• I was never taught to work hard to learn. I coasted along for so long, that when the work got too difficult to get by on natural ability alone, I tended to give up too easily, because I just hadn't learnt to put in a sustained effort on anything.

• There was too much fragmentation of the material covered.

• There was too much extra stuff to deal with. For children who are immature, socially inept and lacking in confidence, the effort required to succeed at doing school takes a substantial chunk out of the energy available for actual academic learning.

 

 

 

This was my experience. The last point being the largest, most influencing factor in my failure to succeed in PS. I know for a fact that I could have been one of the top students in the state. Instead, distracted by other things, I coasted to a very mediocre position at the center of the bell curve.

 

anyway, I'm n.a.k. right now so to be short, lets just say I'm bitter with regret.