Can we revisit the idea of kids and "electronics"?

[Heather in Neverland]

Let's state the obvious and get it out of the way so that it does not hamper the discussion: it is not a great idea for kids to sit and watch TV all day or play video games all day.

 

Moving on...

 

I've read several threads here and other places over the years where parents talk about not exposing their kids to "electronics" and about how much "computer" time their kids get. I would like to move this topic forward a bit to talk about computer literacy.

 

How computer literate are your children? Every time I read those "electronics" threads I feel like a bad mom. Those who only let their kids play with toys made out of wood come across like they are somehow more virtuous?? So then I start hounding my kids about their computer time for a few days until I give up again.

 

So today I am watching my 10yo talk to his friend on Skype. He has made an animated video of his legos...took the pics with the digital camera, uploaded them to the computer, resized them, and used some kind of animation software to turn it all into a movie, uploaded the movie, and shared it via his blog. Now they are both on Skype talking and watching the video at the same time. I never taught him to do any of this. He is completely self-taught.

 

He picked up my Kindle and in 5 minutes had changed the text size, ordered a free copy of Lord of The Flies and was using the text-to-speech function to hear it aloud.

 

He builds these amazing robots out of legos and programs them using their software to do all sorts of cool things like talk and play basketball.

 

I guess I just don't understand how any of this is bad for him?

 

How would limiting his computer time to one hour make him smarter? Yes, of course he still reads books (but now he likes reading them on the kindle...so do I). He still likes to ride his bike and go swimming, loves karate and sharpshooting, etc.

 

I guess I get tired of those people looking down their noses at me for letting him do something he loves that is ALSO very educational. (Can you tell I have had a recent run-in with this? :tongue_smilie:)

[Garga]

I'm on your side. Get so annoyed at people bemoaning computers. As long as there's balance, I see nothing wrong with computers and games.

 

I guess the people against computers are talking about just sitting there doing one thing on the computer. Like, just playing a computer game non-stop.

 

My nephew goes to school, does his homework, watches tv and plays computer games. And that's all. He's not involved in anything and doesn't play with any toys. (He's 10.)

 

Those are the people who give computers and games a bad name.

[Emmy]

I don't think there's anything wrong with any of what you are describing. I think where limitations on electronics need to be enforced is when they

 

- take away from outside playtime

- take away from a child's personal reading time

- are more mindless than what you describe (I.E. Nintendo DS or gamer type games)

 

Your son sounds like he's doing great - I think it all sounds good!

[TraceyS/FL]

I limit my kids because they would spend HOURS on buildabearville.com.

 

They are NOT limited for the things you are listing - in fact, i was just talking to DD about the no time limit account i'm setting up on the computer for them. She named a few more apps for me to consider for it.

 

But, for the educational stuff - i don't have a problem with it.... i wish though they would do 1/2 of what yours is doing! LOL!!

[Mandamom]

I can relate. I've got a techno 16 year old. He loves to film and edit movies. But before he does the techno stuff he spends his time writing the script, determining which friends will be in the film and working with his close friend to make sure the movie comes out the way he wants it to be. I think he's up to about 10 shorts now.

 

His friends are now vying for a chance to be in his next film :)

 

The fact his interests in writing, editing, comics, and art along with hanging out with his friends all involve use of modern technology. If he were only staying in his room doing screen time rather than being involved in a variety of activities (work, youth group, drama club, time with friends, etc.) I would be concerned.

 

I think it is a balancing act. By the way his younger brother would rather spend his time outside than do techno stuff.

[Carrie12345]

My 10yo creates Power Point presentations as a way to tutor his online classmates.

I've been using computers longer than he's been alive and I have no idea how to use PP.

 

That same 10yo WOULD spend his entire life on the computer if I let him, so I do have to keep tabs on his usage, but I absolutely see a lot of value in his computer literacy.

[Johanna]

in my humble opinion, it's all about balance. On a beautiful day, my kids very well know that they are NOT allowed in front of the screen. They would rather be outside anyways. However, at other times I generously allow them time with their gadgets(though this is the first thing that gets taken away for consequences).

I can't believe how much they learn about the way electronics work from fooling with this stuff (especially my son and his digital camera). I believe it's a skill and, well, let's face it.....our world is "techno" based and it's good for them to know how to work a computer as well as other things!!

[LaxMom]

I think there is a significant difference in what you describe - using a computer as a tool - and engaging it as an entertainment destination. A kid's brain is engaged in a creative endeavor when using it as a tool, and it's not any different, in that sense, than using a camera to create clay animation.

 

We limit screen time of all kinds because there are marked changes in behavior when we allow unfettered access, and because we (I) really don't care to have the kids engaged in a lot of "sit and stare" activities. Ironically, we know a family that makes it a point to tell people that they don't even have TV (seems like it comes up in every social outing) but their children spend a LOT of time sitting in front of videos, playing computer games, etc. And it shows.

 

I wouldn't be opposed to my kids using the computer to create, though. (They're still relatively young, so that's something of a non-issue at this point, though.)

[WTMCassandra]

I think there is a significant difference in what you describe - using a computer as a tool - and engaging it as an entertainment destination. A kid's brain is engaged in a creative endeavor when using it as a tool, and it's not any different, in that sense, than using a camera to create clay animation.

 

 

:iagree: The mantra at our house is "Computers are tools, not toys." Our children work on Mavis Beacon Typing, play chess, do Google Sketch-Up, play Cargo Bridge (physics/engineering training), type in Word, make PowerPoint slides, etc.

 

in my humble opinion, it's all about balance. On a beautiful day, my kids very well know that they are NOT allowed in front of the screen. They would rather be outside anyways.

 

Yes, yes! No way will I allow them to be on the computer when the weather is beautiful. Computer time is mainly for winter, for downtime, for after dark, etc. And we keep the time short. One might be on the computer while the other is practicing piano, for example.

 

We are not in a hurry to get our children too plugged in. With four Macintoshes and two iPhones in the house and a comp sci guy for a Dad, they WILL get it. And if we were too "het-up" about teaching them indepth now, their knowledge would be obsolete.

 

What the OP described as her son's activities on the computer sounds wonderfully constructive and engaging. I would have no problem with it. I also think it's a "stage of life" thing. I don't see my 12 and 10 yos needing to spend that kind of time on the computer, but for older teens honing skills, it seems more appropriate.

Edited May 26, 2009 by WTMCassandra

[Nestof3]

It's not bad for him. I think it is great. I also find that different than playing the same miniclip game for hours (something Ben would be prone to do).

 

Difference:

 

When Ben asks to use the computer, I ask what he's going to do and give him time limits. He'll be playing an arcade kind of game -- that's it.

 

When Nathan asks to use the computer, he is typing stories, recipes, menus, looking up information, illustrating stories, playing a game here and there, playing geography games, checking amazon for books, looking at the weather patterns, etc.

 

Aaron also taught himself how to start a blog, to use Facebook, to use an MP3 player on his computer, to use MS Word, to pay his bills online, to do his banking online, and to play a game here and there. He also chats with and emails friends.

 

I think computers are a wonderful thing. I don't see a need to hold off on using them until they are a certain age. They learn now that there are limits to certain things in life: desserts, time with friends, arcade type video games, etc.

[Impish]

All my kids use the computer, to one degree or another.

 

Diva is writing a fiction novel. She hops onto youtube, plugs in her headphones, and writes merrily along. She also was into webkinz for a bit, but that's gone the way of the dodo it seems.

 

Tazzie can surf the net better than his daddy, I think. He has a folder of his favourites, and it was how I first realized the lil stinker was reading, because he knew which one was which, even when I switched the order around, lol! He has some 'just for fun' games,which do get time limited, but also tons of educational links that he can play for however long he wants.

 

Diva also loves the computer. I plug her into abc games or counting and she's totally enthralled!

 

As others have said, I view it as a tool for the kids. I do strictly monitor it, because Diva is 10, and I don't want her getting into any sort of online chat groups. She's simply too trusting.

[Wyndie]

I love what your son is doing online! That's a completely different thing than zoning out and being mindlessly addicted. I think those who limit time (like myself) probably do so b/c their child is more inclined to become anti-social if left to the computer as long as they like. My son's personality changes in an ugly way if he spends too much time on the 'puter; even when it's doing something constructive like writing a novel.

 

I think those who are criticizing your use of the computer don't understand the difference between someone using it as a tool and someone being a zombie. My guess would be they struggle with the zombie aspect in their house and think everyone does; thereby not understanding how others can spend hours in front of a computer without problem.

 

I'm a little jealous of all your son does... :D

[BikeBookBread]

At what age did you start letting your children begin to use the computer for educational purposes? Our girls are only 5 and 3, but they have friends who are 5 or so and on the computer ALL THE TIME doing learning games up on the Noggin and PBS Kids websites. And these kids have talked about their "fun games" to my older daughter, especially, who thinks we're just holding back the world from her.

 

DH and I have made up our minds that our girls WON'T use the computer for anything until they have something of a fix on the concrete world (whatever that means! Ha ha!). For us that means no counting, ABC, brain-training type "games", etc. on the computer because we want them to understand learning from paper and wooden toys (I laughed sheepishly when I read that, because I am kind of a toy snob...:blush:)

 

We're not against technology, whatsoever! Just think that it has been pushed onto kids at such an early age that concrete learning can sometimes get pushed aside for the sake of the "new and exciting".

[Heather in Neverland]

At what age did you start letting your children begin to use the computer for educational purposes? Our girls are only 5 and 3, but they have friends who are 5 or so and on the computer ALL THE TIME doing learning games up on the Noggin and PBS Kids websites. And these kids have talked about their "fun games" to my older daughter, especially, who thinks we're just holding back the world from her.

 

DH and I have made up our minds that our girls WON'T use the computer for anything until they have something of a fix on the concrete world (whatever that means! Ha ha!). For us that means no counting, ABC, brain-training type "games", etc. on the computer because we want them to understand learning from paper and wooden toys (I laughed sheepishly when I read that, because I am kind of a toy snob...:blush:)

 

We're not against technology, whatsoever! Just think that it has been pushed onto kids at such an early age that concrete learning can sometimes get pushed aside for the sake of the "new and exciting".

 

 

Honestly? Both of my boys started playing on computers around age 3. They do play on noggin and pbskids and JumpStart learning games. Both of them read well at age 4 and are ahead in math for their grade so I don't think computers hampered them at all. Both of them like to to do things like CLub Penguin, too, but I find it doesn't keep their attention long.

 

Another example: my 5yo taught himself how to open Microsoft Word, type in sentences, change the font, bold, center the sentence, etc. He loves writing stories on it. And the spellcheck is actually helping him learn to spell! The other day he was writing something down during lesson time, caught himself spelling it wrong, and said nope, the computer said it is spelled with an e not an a.

 

My kids have their own computers so they will stay off mine! :tongue_smilie: They are not allowed to surf the internet though. Websites have to be purposeful and preapproved by us.

 

I was at a conference once that discussed the use of technology in education. The speaker asked us, "How many of you have ever played a board game with a child and LET them win?" Most of us raised our hands. Then he asked, "How many of you have ever played a videogame with a child and had to LET them win?" No one raised their hand.

 

It's like their brains are wired differently than ours. When the school district I worked in went all digital for attendance and grading we had many teachers RETIRE because they would not touch a computer. Yet my 5yo embraces it. It's a whole new world.

[MamaT]

My 12yo dd is our child that does creative things on the computer. She loves digital photography and has created some beautiful artwork. She knows how to turn pictures into pop art, etc. - just does all kinds of creative things with the pictures she takes.

 

She has some kind of voice changing software that she and her friends play around with making up plays, etc.

 

She also makes jewelry and sells it on ebay. She has sold other things as well. She has more money in her Paypal account that I do! LOL

 

I don't monitor how much time she is on the computer because she doesn't abuse it. She has many other interests including dancing, sewing, cooking, etc.

 

Her 10yo brother, on the other hand, I have to give a time limit. He is the kid who would veg out in front of a video game for hours if I let him.

 

I think all kids are different. A parent who is paying attention will know if their children are being creative or just "vegging."

[bettyandbob]

I don't see anything wrong with your approach. There is a difference between mindless use of one piece of media and being able to manipulate multiple platforms for a creative project. I think it's important to be comfortable with media. I think it's good to get comfortable with it under the parent's supervision. It is true that computer literacy today does not mean an ability to program whatever new technology is available in 5 years. However, the comfort with manipulating technology they gain at home will help them with the constant technology manipulation they will have to do in college (no matter what degree they pursue). There is always carryover.

[angela in ohio]

We limit screen time deeply. Dd can type papers now that she has hit junior high and this coming year (8th grade) will do a typing program, and all dc watch about one movie a week and play a computer game or such maybe once a week (probably closer to once a month.) In high school, we will start using the computer as a research and presentation tool sometimes.

 

I get the opposite reaction from you. People look down on me for this choice (though not IRL usually, just online.) There was even a thread not long ago debating whether dc who don't learn computer skills young will be employable.

 

I don't slight anyone for choosing more electronics for their dc; it is just a different approach.

[MBM]

If you'd like to read a neuroscientist's perspective, you might find iBrain by UCLA neuroscientist Gary Small and Gigi Vorgan interesting. The book doesn't pooh-pooh the use of electronics entirely but explains some of the ways our brains react to screen time.

Edited May 26, 2009 by MBM
italicizing a title

[WishboneDawn]

We've always had lots of computers and game systems in the house. My husband and I grew up on them and managed to come out the other side as avid readers and interesting human beings so we just didn't see the harm. My kids don't have limits and there are days when that's just about all they do. But there are also times when they don't bother with them for days or weeks.

 

I don't bother distinguishing between computers as tools and computers as toys. I remember "playing" with computer game that gave me a good knowledge of Central American geography (Pirates! for those curious). I remember "working" with graphics programs for school assignments that were a pile of fun. So I'm pretty relaxed about technology in our house.

 

I do know some kids can develop problems with games and I'm not shy about limiting those kids when they visit our house (although I'm not convinced they don't have problems precisely because they've always had limits imposed) but it hasn't been an issue in our house and so I see no reason to limit it.

 

Even what some would term the mindless play has spilled over into play with Lego, role playing outside, stories that are written, books that are read, etc. I haven't found a computer or video games yet that was utterly devoid of value. Heck, at the very least every kid should know that you need to decapitate a zombie to kill it...Just in case! :D

[Catwoman]

Heather, I agree with everything you said in both of your posts.

 

It sounds like my ds9 is a lot like your 10yo, and we have computers and Playstation in the house, and DVD players and gaming systems in the cars, and it works out just fine for us.

 

If it's a nice day and ds would prefer to use his free time playing a video game or on the computer, that's what he does. I don't "require" a certain amount of outdoor play (although now that the weather is nice, I am thinking of adding a daily walk in the middle of our school day to break things up a bit.)

 

I'm not saying that I let my ds spend 12 hours a day on Playstation and the computer, but I am probably more lenient about it than the other homeschooling moms I know. They may look down their noses at me for it, but my ds was loading his own software when he was 3, and is already far more computer literate than most of those homeschooling moms, so I think my techno-loving ds is doing just fine. (My dh and I still laugh about the time when one of dh's assistants was having trouble loading an accounting package on to her computer, and our then-4yo ds walked over and did it for her. He started telling her about how software licensing agreements work, and her eyes just sort of glazed over... ;))

 

Cat

[Heather in Neverland]

Heather, I agree with everything you said in both of your posts.

 

It sounds like my ds9 is a lot like your 10yo, and we have computers and Playstation in the house, and DVD players and gaming systems in the cars, and it works out just fine for us.

 

If it's a nice day and ds would prefer to use his free time playing a video game or on the computer, that's what he does. I don't "require" a certain amount of outdoor play (although now that the weather is nice, I am thinking of adding a daily walk in the middle of our school day to break things up a bit.)

 

I'm not saying that I let my ds spend 12 hours a day on Playstation and the computer, but I am probably more lenient about it than the other homeschooling moms I know. They may look down their noses at me for it, but my ds was loading his own software when he was 3, and is already far more computer literate than most of those homeschooling moms, so I think my techno-loving ds is doing just fine. (My dh and I still laugh about the time when one of dh's assistants was having trouble loading an accounting package on to her computer, and our then-4yo ds walked over and did it for her. He started telling her about how software licensing agreements work, and her eyes just sort of glazed over... ;))

 

Cat

 

I gotta tell ya...I LOVE technology!

 

I love that I can use my cell phone to videotape my boys saying "Hi Daddy! We miss you!" and send it to my husband's cell phone when he is working late.

 

I love that even though I will be on the other side of the world, we can turn on Skype and video chat with family and friends back here.

 

I love that I can share pics and videos via the web, watch TV shows I missed, and shop so I don't have to waste time driving to the store.

 

I love that I can download books onto my Kindle in less than a minute and that I can take them with me on it and save the money from shipping them to Malaysia.

 

I love that I am doing my second master's degree ENTIRELY online and that I will be able to continue working on it even though I am moving to another country.

 

And I love that my kids are growing up "comfortable" with all this technology. Those teachers retiring because they were afraid to touch a computer really stuck with me.

[Nestof3]

I gotta tell ya...I LOVE technology!

 

I love that I can use my cell phone to videotape my boys saying "Hi Daddy! We miss you!" and send it to my husband's cell phone when he is working late.

 

I love that even though I will be on the other side of the world, we can turn on Skype and video chat with family and friends back here.

 

I love that I can share pics and videos via the web, watch TV shows I missed, and shop so I don't have to waste time driving to the store.

 

I love that I can download books onto my Kindle in less than a minute and that I can take them with me on it and save the money from shipping them to Malaysia.

 

I love that I am doing my second master's degree ENTIRELY online and that I will be able to continue working on it even though I am moving to another country.

 

And I love that my kids are growing up "comfortable" with all this technology. Those teachers retiring because they were afraid to touch a computer really stuck with me.

 

I agree with you, Heather. It has been frustrating seeing my dad, and even my husband to some extent, struggle with the computer.

 

It has also cut down on how many things I have to own -- like cookbooks, information books, etc. I watched a video the other day on how to make a pie crust. It was GREAT! 99 % of the time, I check www.allrecipes.com for a recipe before even checking my favorite cookbook!

[BikeBookBread]

The main reason we didn't want "screen time" for our young children was because of the results released from the ongoing studies on babies' brain development out of the Univ. of Washington. Originally, we just limited TV time (didn't cut out totally, mind you). I am sure none of this is really new to you, but it is interesting:

 

http://ilabs.washington.edu/news/TIME_BrainierBaby_Jan_06.pdf

 

We're not Ludites, but we definitely want to limit electronic teaching mechanisms for a while...I type this as my daughters are watching a princess movie on a dvd :lol::lol::lol:

[Mabeline]

:iagree: I also think there is a difference when talking about younger kids. Mine are young enough that I hardly ever let them watch tv or play on the computer. They are too young to do any of the things that you mention. I also see that your son uses the electronics to do other things instead of just passively spending time "playing games" I think your son sounds like a very bright and fun kid I wouldn't worry about it.

[Stacy in NJ]

I don't think there's anything wrong with any of what you are describing. I think where limitations on electronics need to be enforced is when they

 

- take away from outside playtime

- take away from a child's personal reading time

- are more mindless than what you describe (I.E. Nintendo DS or gamer type games)

 

Your son sounds like he's doing great - I think it all sounds good!

 

I'm going to disagree with a bit of your list.

 

Nintendo's new DSi offers tons of functions. It has a built in camera and internet access.

 

Games can be educational too. My kiddos both play Animal Crossing which leds them to create whole cities and teaches about trading, saving and bartering.

 

If kids are spending hours staring at a screen with little interaction required, I think that's potentially damaging. But, soooo many of the games require and teach some very sophisticated skills that I really do think they're fairly educational.

 

Also, both of my kiddos know their way around a keyboard and a computer. Like Heather's ds, they've never taken a computer class or recieved any lessons. They just learned as they went.

 

My 2 cents.

[Jennifer in MI]

I agree with you Heather! My oldest loves rocketry. He builds his own and is constantly researching different aspects of it. I have no problem allowing him to have almost unlimited time on the internet doing this research. For him, this means learning a lot about chemistry, physics, scientists, etc.

 

My second boy is interested in making videos. I may have him email your ds! He is saving for a videocamera of his own right now.

 

Now, my third ds would spend LOTS of time on silly things like games. So, we do limit him.

 

I love technology too!

[Jill- OK]

Let's state the obvious and get it out of the way so that it does not hamper the discussion: it is not a great idea for kids to sit and watch TV all day or play video games all day.

 

Agreed. :-)

 

How computer literate are your children?

 

Actually...the oldest two are very computer literate.

 

Even though they were limited, as far as computer/screen time, when they were younger. :D

 

Honestly...it's not rocket science. The phenomenon of children picking up computer skills quickly doesn't mean anything to me; younger kids pick up almost ANYTHING quicker than adults do. Doesn't mean they need to do it, though, if you get my meaning. I do want them to be able to navigate a computer, easily...but I don't think that means they have to begin at three. I was, erm, waaaay older than that when I first began using a computer, and it didn't take me long. It's just not that complex, really, especially anymore, everything is so user-friendly. (If you're motivated and unafraid to try new stuff. So, a preteen is more likely to be successful than, say, a sixty-five-year-old who is used to being respected, and doesn't like looking foolish).

 

I guess I just don't understand how any of this is bad for him?

 

How would limiting his computer time to one hour make him smarter?

 

Well, I don't know about other folks you've talked with, but I don't think that limiting kids' computer time to one hour makes them smarter, lol. My reasons for de-emphasizing it (notice I didn't say "limiting") have more to do with brain development and delayed gratification in early ages (Jane Healy's books talk about theories on this), and wanting to steer kids towards more difficult, organic, reality-based activities in later years.

 

::Shrug::

 

I don't have anything against screen-focused activities, even goofy, totally unproductive ones (one teen has a Facebook account and the other is playing Kill Zone--Lord help me--as I write this). I just prefer for the main pursuits, at our house, to be more natural. That's pretty much the way I am about almost everything else, though, so while some of it is based on research and cause/effect beliefs...some of it just might be a personality thing. I gravitate towards classical education for the same reason; a simple belief in simplicity, I guess.

 

I guess I get tired of those people looking down their noses at me for letting him do something he loves that is ALSO very educational. (Can you tell I have had a recent run-in with this? :tongue_smilie:)

 

Every time I read those "electronics" threads I feel like a bad mom. Those who only let their kids play with toys made out of wood come across like they are somehow more virtuous?? So then I start hounding my kids about their computer time for a few days until I give up again.

 

I think you have a couple of different issues, here. If you're comfortable with what you've decided, then...be comfortable with what you've decided.

 

Personally...I could probably get offended by several people, all over the map, if I chose to...because I don't have a hard and fast mindset about it, and folks can get pretty dogmatic, on both sides. Yes, I don't like for the Littles to be too screen-focused, too early, but with older siblings, sometimes it gets harder to limit that. (My younger kids have had much more screen time--and much more variety in what they're exposed to--than my olders, simply because it's easier when there's no Big Kids having fun doing that stuff in front of you, lol).

 

But I also let my kids do some things that the die-hard No Screens wouldn't dream of. And think it's okay.

 

So...I guess I'm saying find your place, and let other folks believe what they believe. Evaluate what people say, have an open mind when someone brings up a good point...and then do what you feel is right for your family.

 

JMO.

[Ginevra]

I guess I just don't understand how any of this is bad for him?

 

How would limiting his computer time to one hour make him smarter? Yes, of course he still reads books (but now he likes reading them on the kindle...so do I). He still likes to ride his bike and go swimming, loves karate and sharpshooting, etc.

 

I guess I get tired of those people looking down their noses at me for letting him do something he loves that is ALSO very educational. (Can you tell I have had a recent run-in with this? :tongue_smilie:)

 

I haven't read the ensuing responses (on purpose), just going with my own response, here.

 

I do limit my children's "screen time" (including all the usual "offenders": DS, Wii, web, TV, DVD, etc.). However! I agree with what you're saying. My daughter, who is 12, has learned and honed skills unimaginable, all self-taught, on the computer. First, it was Neopets, where she learned HTML code and web design from creating her "pet pages" and adding music codes and colors and designs. Also, she practiced drawing with the step-by-step "Draw Your Neopet" thingy. From that, she became interested in Manga-style drawing, although she also does realistic drawing. From there, she joined other web communities. She has amazing story-telling skills from role-playing. She designs artwork and computer-enhances or animates it. She does this so well that now she has many requests from other players to create pictures for their profiles. It astounds me as neither dh nor I am "techy".

 

Yes, she still plays old-fashioned ordinary things like cards and chess. But I am extremely thankful that I did not ban the digital world. Our children live in this world, populated by screens. They don't live in a world of quills, ink wells and lanterns. It behooves them to learn to speak the language of their era - the computer.

[Heather in Neverland]

I haven't read the ensuing responses (on purpose), just going with my own response, here.

 

I do limit my children's "screen time" (including all the usual "offenders": DS, Wii, web, TV, DVD, etc.). However! I agree with what you're saying. My daughter, who is 12, has learned and honed skills unimaginable, all self-taught, on the computer. First, it was Neopets, where she learned HTML code and web design from creating her "pet pages" and adding music codes and colors and designs. Also, she practiced drawing with the step-by-step "Draw Your Neopet" thingy. From that, she became interested in Manga-style drawing, although she also does realistic drawing. From there, she joined other web communities. She has amazing story-telling skills from role-playing. She designs artwork and computer-enhances or animates it. She does this so well that now she has many requests from other players to create pictures for their profiles. It astounds me as neither dh nor I am "techy".

 

Yes, she still plays old-fashioned ordinary things like cards and chess. But I am extremely thankful that I did not ban the digital world. Our children live in this world, populated by screens. They don't live in a world of quills, ink wells and lanterns. It behooves them to learn to speak the language of their era - the computer.

 

I could just hug you! I limit my kids TV-viewing to practically nothing unless it is educational. When it comes to mindless Wii games, they limit them elves...they just get bored easily. But the other amazing things these kids are doing on a computer? I am loving it!

[Ginevra]

I could just hug you!

 

Hug accepted. Thank you! :)

 

And I just realized that I said, "our children don't live in a world of quills...", yet Quill is my username. Kind of ironic, really. ;)

[Jumping In Puddles]

Because technology changes so quickly, I don't think it's so important that very young children are taught to use computers because it will help them as an adult.

 

For example, if my kids never touch a computer until they are 16, how quickly do you think they'd learn the ins and outs? How quickly will they get up to speed with kids who have been on the computer since they were 3? Remember, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs did not grow up with computers and many other successful techies did not either. The technology that kids use today will be outdated by the time they graduate.

 

That being said, I don't see anything actually wrong with kids using technology and I think it can even be a wonderful thing for many kids - like yours!

 

I also don't understand why people care what other people choose to do with their children. :confused: I wouldn't judge your kids to be any better or worse than, say, a child who lives to camp, hike, make bow and arrows and doesn't want any screen time. There are people who would say a kid like that is at a disadvantage and that is where I will disagree. :) Just because he or she doesn't want to blog/make videos, build robotics or whatever, doesn't mean they can't grow to be competent computer users as young adults! It's all about personality and balance.

 

I happen to love technology and when I think of all the really cool things my kids will be able to do with it (photography, video making, cartooning, blogging etc), I am a little excited!

 

I guess that there are some people who think all technology is evil but I doubt that is many people -- I mean, come on! We are communicating via computer as we bash technology? :confused:

Edited May 27, 2009 by Jumping In Puddles

[Carol in Cal.]

From the time that she was 3 or so, it has been clear to me that once she has had any screen time her imagination dries up for the rest of the day. Now she is 12, and it's not as bad as it used to be, but when she was younger the effect of TV or computer use stopped her from being able to do imaginative play or make up stories or enjoy being read to until the next morning, no matter what time of the day it happened. So for me, seeing this dramatic effect made me limit her screen time quite significantly. Also, some of the preschooler games/shows really changed her attitude--Arthur, specifically. Whenever she watched it on TV or played an Arthur game on her computer, she would start playing the 'all sarcasm/disrespect all the time' network. I could see her trying to control it, and failing completely. It was so weird, because she was unusually self-contained as a kid, but Arthur just took her down. Also, Sesame Street was so fast-paced--it made sense for many kids, but DD had an unusually long attention span from birth, so SS would have actually messed that up.

 

So in my case, I learned very early to limit screen time and got an immediate and noticable gain by doing so. I don't say that everyone should do this, based on my child's experience, but I do think that everyone should be thoughtful and observant about it.

 

When DD was 7 and I had to go back to work fulltime, DH was supposed to pick up some of the homeschooling and interaction slack. Basically he put her in front of one video after another for hours on many days. I objected to this, but got nowhere until he saw her in a choral concert, looking away from the director more than at her, and striking up conversations with the girl next to her DURING THE CONCERT--something that she never did at 5 or 6 but which was caused by the attention span/distraction issues that screen time gave her. She was so used to being entertained all the time that she would let nothing get in the way of that, not even her beloved director. DH was shocked, and we changed back, and in about 2 months she had gone through sufficient withdrawal to be herself again. It was pretty weird to see how strong the effects were.

 

Now that she is older, I have lightened up a lot, but still, she would watch Disney channel 24/7 if I allowed it; and many of her friends who have video games have no other interests at all. Everyone I know has to limit their kids for this. And my friends who are unschoolers really have a hard time with it.

 

She taught herself Paint and Word and Power Point, and I encourage that. I don't consider that screen time per se--it's more using the computer as a tool. But the computer games and websites are another story.

 

Bottom line, I guess, is that I think everyone should watch their own children and determine for themselves to what extent the screen is a plug in drug, and make decisions for their own families accordingly. And I also think that most people don't question this enough.

[KarenNC]

Bottom line, I guess, is that I think everyone should watch their own children and determine for themselves to what extent the screen is a plug in drug, and make decisions for their own families accordingly. And I also think that most people don't question this enough.

 

We also had difficulties with screen time when my daughter was in the 3 yo or so range----even shows that did not do the "change perspective every few seconds" style caused problems. She would watch Mr. Rogers and her attitude and behavior would go downhill precipitously. She's much better now at almost 9, but we still put some limits on it because that still manifests itself to a degree.

 

My friends joke that we are Luddites because I despise IM and chat rooms, have no interest in Facebook or texting--don't get between me and the Internet, though ;). My husband, on the other hand, blogs, uses facebook and works in IT. We have no cable or satellite because we weren't using them when we had it.

 

We are not anti-technology, just very choosy in how we involve it in our lives. She has her own computer (one of our old ones), but not in her room, not on the Internet and not to be used for hours on end, even for educational games. She has typing, Zoombinis, Timez Attack and other educational software, but tended to want to only play games that were more of a preschool nature until we gave them away, still prefers arcade type games. She does her French online, is allowed some game access online (Webkinz, some other games), and watches videos/dvds (we don't have cable or satellite). We may move to more online coursework as she gets older.

 

If we had the extra money we'd likely get a Wii for the family, but buying it is not a priority. She has a digital camera and an ipod, no DS at this point. Perhaps when she's a bit older and exhibits less of a tendency to argue over being told to stop using electronics because it's time to do something else (it would just end up spending more time in my desk than her hands at this point because of that and we get enough drama as it is). We do audio books, but not videos in the car. We are becoming involved with a Lego robotics league this fall.

 

So, it's not an all or nothing situation for us. If she primarily chose to eat vegetables and fruit all the time, I wouldn't have to limit sweets and junk. If she chose to spend the vast majority of her screen time on things that are more creative/educational than "My Fantasy Wedding" or arcade-type games, I wouldn't have to limit her screen time either. I know there is a theory that if you let the child just go to their own inclinations they will end up with a balanced "diet" but I'm not willing to go through the problems associated with getting to that place in our house, if she ever would at this age. She's not quite got the maturity to be let loose to that extent---we're more about gradually loosening the reins as she exhibits responsibility with what she already has.