ProudGrandma Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 my daughter, age 12, oldest of 3 kids (2 younger brothers) sometimes plays like she is 7 years old. I mean, she has a great imagination, but she will make all sort of things have personalities and voices. For example, she got a body pillow for Christmas. This afternoon she was walking around with it on her hip like a baby, talking to it like it was a baby...calling it Sweetie...asking it questions and then having it respond with a baby voice. She does this with stuffed animals too. I wouldn't be too concerned except that she will even do things like that when she is with her friends....some from PS and I am concerned that maybe those kids are going to find that behavior very immature and start to tease her about it. I have tried to talk to her about it, but she just doesn't seem to want to change. It's not like it's all of the time....or even most of the time....but it is still fairly often. If this is not normal behavior, how can I get her to see that and more importantly how can I break her of this? thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 Totally normal. She is in that transition period between being a little girl and being a teen. Some little girl behaviors will persist longer than others. Leave her alone--it will work itself out in time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GraciebytheBay Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 I think it is normal and beautiful that she is still childlike in this way! My dd played with her American Girl dolls until last year (12 yo), and her "big" gift this year was a Furby. They are children for so short a time. Please don't try to "break her" of this! I wish more girls were like this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 Hmm. I think it's a bit unusual, given her age, but I wouldn't go so far as to say it's abnormal, if that makes sense. I would be concerned about teasing, though. Is this how she's always played, or is it something fairly new? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reya Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 My cousin and her friends played dress-up at 14 and 16. I think it really depends on the girl. I wouldn't have done that at seven or even five, myself, but I was "born old." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 My daughter and her best friend revisited My Little Pony again at that age. Used their own money to improve their collections. Had a blast for a couple of months. I wouldn't worry a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted December 27, 2012 Author Share Posted December 27, 2012 the fact that they are only children once is where my conflict is...I don't want her to grow up too fast...and I love taht she is still childlike...my neice who is the same age (lives in a big city and we don't) is too grown up in my opinion...and I am thrilled that my dd isn't like that. thanks you ladies for putting my fears to rest...I do apprecaite it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 Totally normal. She is in that transition period between being a little girl and being a teen. Some little girl behaviors will persist longer than others. Leave her alone--it will work itself out in time. Yup. While my now 19-yr-old no longer does this, my 16-yr-old dd does. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matryoshka Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 My daughter and her best friend revisited My Little Pony again at that age. Used their own money to improve their collections. Had a blast for a couple of months. I wouldn't worry a bit. Well, apparently the My Little Pony thing is huge in high school and college. Even among boys. I honestly don't get it at all, but when dds went to Splash at MIT there were whole My Little Pony fandom classes. Apparently the fans are known as "Bronys". (I'm not sure they're into the toys, just the show...) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinmom Posted December 27, 2012 Share Posted December 27, 2012 My thirteen year old is still playing with and asking for new sets of Playmobil Pony Ranch! This from a seventh grader who is also mature enough to work two days a week at a real barn to pay for a horse lease so that she can compete in dressage. It is definitely a transition period! Enjoy the fact that your little girl is not growing up too fast!! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 I wouldn't give it s second thought. Society at large has our kids growing up too fast. Let her play. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DianeW88 Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 I would caution you, OP, that in a peer situation with other girls her age, she would very likely be made fun of if she played that way in front of them. While 12 is a transition age, with varying levels of maturity, it is also a mean, peer dependent age among girls, and they are quick to react harshly to anyone they feel is "babyish"...mostly from their own insecurities, but nevertheless. Some 12 year olds could care less what other girls think, and if that's your dd, then great. But if she's sensitive, it could be very painful. Not to mention...those kinds of labels tend to follow you throughout your teen years, if you remain with the same peer group. That can be rough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 When I taught school to this age group, none of the girls would have behaved that way. But I agree that it sounds like she is just still in that childhood imaginative play space and I don't think it's developmentally abnormal at all... More culturally abnormal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy in TX Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 My second dd did that--"little girl" play right into her teens. She doesn't do it anymore (she's 15 now). I never gave it a second thought. She's always been very creative and imaginative and loved to play. She still plays with her little cousins that way when they come over. She's a delightful person. I wouldn't worry. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misty.warden Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 I would caution you, OP, that in a peer situation with other girls her age, she would very likely be made fun of if she played that way in front of them. While 12 is a transition age, with varying levels of maturity, it is also a mean, peer dependent age among girls, and they are quick to react harshly to anyone they feel is "babyish"...mostly from their own insecurities, but nevertheless. Some 12 year olds could care less what other girls think, and if that's your dd, then great. But if she's sensitive, it could be very painful. Not to mention...those kinds of labels tend to follow you throughout your teen years, if you remain with the same peer group. That can be rough. If keeping your peer group at any personal cost is something important to your dd, she may do well to grow out of it, but it doesn't sound like she wants to. I would encourage her to find less shallow peers who respect her (difficult at that age, but still a valuable lesson IMO) rather than tell her to change herself to avoid being teased by insecure teenagers. IMO, anyone to teases another child for any reason is a bully and not a friend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparrow Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 my daughter, age 12, oldest of 3 kids (2 younger brothers) sometimes plays like she is 7 years old. I mean, she has a great imagination, but she will make all sort of things have personalities and voices. For example, she got a body pillow for Christmas. This afternoon she was walking around with it on her hip like a baby, talking to it like it was a baby...calling it Sweetie...asking it questions and then having it respond with a baby voice. She does this with stuffed animals too. I wouldn't be too concerned except that she will even do things like that when she is with her friends....some from PS and I am concerned that maybe those kids are going to find that behavior very immature and start to tease her about it. I have tried to talk to her about it, but she just doesn't seem to want to change. It's not like it's all of the time....or even most of the time....but it is still fairly often. If this is not normal behavior, how can I get her to see that and more importantly how can I break her of this? thanks. Regarding the bolded, your daughter's PS friends may need the "little girl" respite your daughter provides. As many have mentioned, 12 is such a transitional time. I was a young 12 and I had friends that acted much older when we were at school, but when they played at my house, we played with dolls. I don't think it's a trait that needs "breaking". Soon enough, she'll stop on her own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebacabunch Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 So normal. I would say that the way most 12 yr old ps girls act is actually abnormal. My sister keeps pushing her 12 yr old to grow up, dress provocatively, and hang out with boys. My 12 year old wants to wear tshirts from her favorite bands and dress more modestly, plays guitar and video games for fun, has her own phone and , gasp, still collects and plays with webkins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freckles Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 My 13 yr old dd does silly things at home like this all the time. At ps she is very poised and mature. It's a transition time in their life. I would just laugh and roll with it for now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 Can you send her to my house? I have an 8 yr old who is frustrated because she has trouble finding kids who want to play with her in more pretend-type ways who also have the more developed scenarios and vocabulary that she likes. It seems like even at 8 many girls have moved into teen-type behavior-even if they're still playing make believe, it's more teen romance and Twilight (or the later Harry Potter books) and much less pretending to make magic spells or creating imaginary worlds. It's frustrating at 8, so I imagine it would be even more so at 12! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 My 12 year old still plays that way with her younger sisters...sometimes. I've noticed it's becoming more and more rare as she gets older. But there are still sweet moments when they are all three in the floor playing with their dolls or stuffed animals, and it's very sweet. She never plays that way when her friends are over. They spend their time locked up in her room doing hair and make-up talking about "grown up things" lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 Well, apparently the My Little Pony thing is huge in high school and college. Even among boys. I honestly don't get it at all, but when dds went to Splash at MIT there were whole My Little Pony fandom classes. Apparently the fans are known as "Bronys". (I'm not sure they're into the toys, just the show...) Oh, yes - Collegeman (21, an Honors Chem. major) is very much a Brony...along are most of the other guys in Heavy Metal Club at his school. He was trilled to get Brony pants for Christmas, and has many toys (small ones he glued to his black topo hat. Yes - top hat.) he and a few others went to a My LIttle Ponby convention close by a few months back, too, and met some of the writers for the show. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AimeeM Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 Does she have any friends who enjoy doing this too? I will say, the same as many others have, that this seems normal. My dd's favorite (and top requested) xmas gifts for the past two years have been AG dolls (she got Samantha this year; Felicity for her last birthday). She is 11. Her best friend (public school age peer) lives in our neighborhood and very much enjoys her own AG dolls. The girls play pretend with the dolls, fix their hair, take them "out to play", etc. They still play pretend in the yard (Harry Potter anyone?). No big. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CyndiLJ Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 While not a daughter, I still have a 14 year old son who plays imaginary super hero stories with his younger 10 year old brother and friends. He acts perfectly appropriate in other settings, just loves to still play. I am not rushing him, but we did have a conversation a couple times about how others his own age might perceive it and what might help keep him from benig made fun of. So far, it has worked and allowed him to still be the kid he needs to be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 Well, apparently the My Little Pony thing is huge in high school and college. Even among boys. I honestly don't get it at all, but when dds went to Splash at MIT there were whole My Little Pony fandom classes. Apparently the fans are known as "Bronys". (I'm not sure they're into the toys, just the show...) Trying to figure out how to multiquote. Obvious not quite right. But I can't believe our slightly nerdy daughters were actally being cool! Both my dcs still like the show too. Oh, yes - Collegeman (21, an Honors Chem. major) is very much a Brony...along are most of the other guys in Heavy Metal Club at his school. He was trilled to get Brony pants for Christmas, and has many toys (small ones uhe glued to his black topo hat. Yes - top hat.) he and a few oth7ers went to a My LIttle Ponby convention close by a few months back, too, and met some of the writers for the show. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 Sorry double post Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CupOCoffee Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 the fact that they are only children once is where my conflict is...I don't want her to grow up too fast...and I love taht she is still childlike...my neice who is the same age (lives in a big city and we don't) is too grown up in my opinion...and I am thrilled that my dd isn't like that. thanks you ladies for putting my fears to rest...I do apprecaite it. Without even reading the rest of the replies, I was already forming my response, and it looks similar to what you said above! Consider that the alternative is: talking about boys constantly, wearing make-up, worrying about dressing cute enough, and "being too grown up". I think you found your own answer Mom! ~coffee~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 OP, I think my kids have been asked to do stuff like that in acting classes. There's a crowd out there who would consider it "practice" for several more years. Bonus points for indicating with her body that the pillow is actually as heavy and squirmy as a real baby. The bronys I know collect the toys, by the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.Dup. Posted December 28, 2012 Share Posted December 28, 2012 I think it's perfectly normal given her age and the fact that she has younger siblings. If she acted like this MOST of the time that would be another deal, IMO. And one of the beauties of homeschooling is that we get to keep our kids away from shallow peers who would bully them. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Galatea Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 I think it's normal. I remember that I was still playing with Barbies at 12 and I once got teased by a neighbor girl for riding my little sister's big wheel tricycle (the giant plastic kind) in the driveway once. I just didn't move into the "teenage" phase that fast, and that's okay. It just means that your daughter is still relatively innocent (in a not-too-worldly yet) kind of way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea_lpz Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 Does she have any friends who enjoy doing this too? I will say, the same as many others have, that this seems normal. My dd's favorite (and top requested) xmas gifts for the past two years have been AG dolls (she got Samantha this year; Felicity for her last birthday). She is 11. Her best friend (public school age peer) lives in our neighborhood and very much enjoys her own AG dolls. The girls play pretend with the dolls, fix their hair, take them "out to play", etc. They still play pretend in the yard (Harry Potter anyone?). No big. I agree. I went to public school and at school my group of friends acted mature but at each others homes we still enjoyed pretend play, dolls, and Barbie immensely. I played with dolls at 12 still. It wasn't until around the time I got my first period, at 12 1/2 I gave th up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mytwomonkeys Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 my daughter is 11 1/2. her big gift this year was a baby doll. she plays with barbies everyday. i don't know if my daughter would do what your daughter did, but only because she is much more introverted and wouldn't walk around the house that way. she certainly wouldn't find the behavior weird though. i'm sure she would love hanging out with your daughter!! i think it's totally normal :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 Totally normal. She is in that transition period between being a little girl and being a teen. Some little girl behaviors will persist longer than others. Leave her alone--it will work itself out in time. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted January 19, 2013 Share Posted January 19, 2013 I wouldn't worry about it, other than mentioning it might not be okay with PS girls. Heck, I went to PS, and while publicly we stopped playing with Barbies in 4th grade, some of my favorite times with friends were when they confessed they still played with dolls and we would all play Barbies (secretly) for hours afterward. I think some of my friends did this until they were 14! And after that they got to "pretend" to play with girls they were babysitting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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