Question about why or why not you would censor your child’s reading material.

[TexasProud]

10 hours ago, Clemsondana said:

It was on my parents' bookshelf.  That's where most of my reading came from in middle/high school.  I think it was fairly popular at the time, but I don't know.  Back in the days of 1 TV per house and only a handful of channels, I read all sorts of things over breaks from school.  

Yes, I read Clan of the Cave Bear, Valley of the Dolls, and all the other  junk that was on my parents' shelves.  Well, they also had Isaac Asimov and some classics, but I read a ton of the torrid romance novels that were on their shelves ( my parents were not religious... I was always much more conservative than my parents, even before I started going to church. As my dad said, "I was born old.")

But reading all of those romance novels is part of what turned me off to the genre...the love scenes felt like rape to me. After awhile, I would skim over them to get to the story part.. Even as an elementary kid, it didn't make sense that she didn't want the "hero" until after he started having sex with her and then magically wanted it...

So, I knew that whatever was on my own shelves would be gobbled up by my own children. So my shelves were only filled with classic literature. So, I didn't censor the books per-se, but like a parent who mainly serves tons of fruits and vegetables and no processed foods, they didn't have a taste for Twinkies.

So, I guess I sort of censored "twaddle" as some of you mentioned.  Until my youngest. 

On the dreaded fairy books: She hated reading and couldn't learn to read. In first grade I discovered why: her eye muscles were so incredibly weak and she would start in the middle of a word. It took her so long to figure out what a word was that she totally lost the meaning of a sentence.  She started vision therapy in the spring.  The first book she asked to read ever was.... one of those horrid fairy books.  For the boys, I would have steered them to better choices.  But for her: I took her to Chuckee Cheese after she read 5 of those fairy books.  We still have the whole series.  Not because they are great literature, but because they were the first books she actually wanted to and did read by herself.  But yes, they were absolutely horrid.   

I read aloud a lot to my kids, and the youngest is definitely an auditory learner. As a three-year-old she asked me strapped in her car seat one day, "Mommy, if John Wilkes Booth shot Lincoln in Ford's Theater, what movie were they watching?" She had been listening to some history book I had been reading to the boys.   Which led to a nice discussion of the difference between a movie theater and other types of theaters. 

[teachermom2834]

I definitely censored in that my kids were homeschooled and they just didn’t have much opportunity to pick up much I would have found objectionable. The libraries we used had anything that had any kind of “content” (not sure who made that decision) or a protagonist that was a teen I believe was in a special teen section. I often had to go to that section to find books on our homeschool reading lists for elementary grades. So just by picking books in the children’s library they were censored until they started not being able to find the books they were looking for there and by then they were a little older and there was still nothing super graphic as far as I knew. There were definitely topics that pushed our very tight boundaries though and I was ok with that. The kids didn’t watch much TV and I really thought they needed to start being exposed to some things even if I was uncomfortable. 
 

My dd I actually had to kind of push to take books out of the teen section. She would just abandon a book the first time there was any hint of anything that made her uncomfortable and it seemed over the top (and she loved to read and was abandoning some good books). So we had to talk about things a lot. She was going to be going to a brick and mortar high school and I really thought she needed to know about things and be able to handle situations for her own safety and happiness outside of my home and she really was being overly sensitive. I respected her feelings but it almost felt like she was holding being sensitive up as a virtue and some of the things she was objecting to were perfectly appropriate for an 8th grader. 
 

I don’t remember my kids ever picking up Judy Blume but i distinctly remember those books from my childhood (and teenagerhood) and honestly I probably needed them because no one told me anything and I pretty much learned from those books. 

[SKL]

I never needed to censor books, because my kids were not interested in reading that sort of content.  I have always stayed aware of what books they were reading.  If I saw things going in an unhealthy direction, I would have to figure out what to do, because no, it's not OK for my kids to read stuff that is gross even to me.

What they see on the internet is probably worse than anything they read in a book, and much harder to control.  As my kids are past the age of strict internet limits, I try to pass on my values with words and example, and hope that's enough.

[SKL]

This probably isn't what you were thinking about, but I've been reading Peter Pan for the first time, and I'm wondering if anyone still lets their kids read that book.  😛  Although I'm not much of a pearl clutcher, I have regretted some of the classic children's books I've read with my kids, because of the amount of side discussion needed re historical racism, sexism, classism, violence, and various forms of ignorance.  (I mean I welcomed that up to a point, as it can be a good opener for those important topics, but beyond a point, why would we value this book?)  Even sexual content - I stopped reading an illustrated version of the 1000 Arabian Nights because wow ... that is not a kids' book.

[DawnM]

We censored some.   

My 3rd son would have nightmares as a kid and we wanted to make sure he wasn't watching or reading anything particularly scary or frightening.

Once I found out he was reading The Hunger Games.   He was 8 or 9 and I didn't think it was appropriate, nor did I want him to have nightmares.   But by the time I found out, he was 3/4 of the way through the book.

We did also censor sexual content.   I don't think a 12 year old needs to read game of thrones for example.   However, true stories about SA were not forbidden because I wanted them to understand what was out there and how to protect themselves.

So, age appropriate and nothing that would produce nightmares.

[Momto6inIN]

I didn't feel traumatized by Clan of the Cave Bear as a kid. Quite the opposite. I ate those porn scenes up as a curious pre-teen and re-read them over and over again. Even as a young adult I still re-read them and loved them as a "comfort read".

But as an older adult who can understand that consuming porn creates a warped sexuality, I can also wish that I didn't have those scenes and words in my head and I can recognize that they probably weren't healthy for me.

As for why I read those books in the first place: They were in the public library and I was drawn to fat books because they lasted longer and no one stopped me.

[EKS]

7 minutes ago, Momto6inIN said:

I ate those porn scenes up as a curious pre-teen and re-read them over and over again.

I'm surprised that someone would consider any scene in Clan of the Cave Bear pornographic.  Sexual, yes, but not pornographic.

Now, Valley of the Horses (and later books) is another story 🤣

[KungFuPanda]

11 hours ago, LMD said:

😄

This was my oldest, and no way was I reading them lol. 

I guess I do censor for insipidity. And aggressive annoyingness.

I hid The Digging-est Dog and “couldn’t find” it until I actually forgot where it was. I would read aloud a thing they wanted but for some reason that one really got on my nerves. It was the first non-Seuss book we received from the Dr Seuss book club, so I was already mad at it. Then, to add insult to injury it was terrible AND my kid loved it. It was unearthed fairly recently because we’ve sorted through everything. 
 

I’ve just realized I’m guilty of censorship!

[HomeAgain]

10 hours ago, Rosie_0801 said:

I didn't tell my kids about Dr Seuss.

😄I didn't realize ds hadn't read most of Dr. Seuss until he came across some books in Latin and French.  He translated Cattus Petasatus back into English and thought it was the dumbest thing ever. "It doesn't even rhyme in English!" 😄

We did own the board book of The Foot Book a long time ago, but the usual stories?  Oops.  He learned to read so quickly he went straight into normal books.

[vonfirmath]

11 hours ago, Clarita said:

I loved the Babysitter's Club as a kid. I'm pretty they won't be as entertaining now that I'm an adult. 

I'm not looking forward to feeling like perhaps I "should" be reading Harry Potter to my kids. I couldn't finish half of one as a teenager. I have zero desire to watch all the movies as an adult. I'm hoping if I start Lord of the Rings beforehand they will share my meh-ness with that series.

Dont read them to your kids. Let your kids read them for themselves.  Around here, the kids are all taking about them in 4th and 5th grades.  And they have divided my daughter's middle school up into "teams" that are VERY reminescent of the Harry Potter houses. -- the colors are even the same. Though they are named different type of cats since their mascot is a puma.

[Momto6inIN]

1 hour ago, EKS said:

I'm surprised that someone would consider any scene in Clan of the Cave Bear pornographic.  Sexual, yes, but not pornographic.

Now, Valley of the Horses (and later books) is another story 🤣

Yes, I meant the series as a whole. The first one I agree is not porn. But the rest of the series most definitely is!

[lmrich]

It has been a joke in our household for sometime. But I had to get rid of all the Junie B. Jones books. My six year old dd was becoming Junie B. 

 

[vonfirmath]

1 hour ago, Momto6inIN said:

I didn't feel traumatized by Clan of the Cave Bear as a kid. Quite the opposite. I ate those porn scenes up as a curious pre-teen and re-read them over and over again. Even as a young adult I still re-read them and loved them as a "comfort read".

But as an older adult who can understand that consuming porn creates a warped sexuality, I can also wish that I didn't have those scenes and words in my head and I can recognize that they probably weren't healthy for me.

As for why I read those books in the first place: They were in the public library and I was drawn to fat books because they lasted longer and no one stopped me.

This reminds me of my daughter. She goes into library and wants to know what are the longest books they have. Because she reads so fast.  Thankfully our library has not pointed her to adult books in response!

 

[Red Dove]

6 hours ago, LMD said:

Missed this. Every girl in my school had read the whole series by the end of 6th grade. I would have been 10-11 years old. I really liked them...

Where did you go to school? I wonder if different areas of the U.S. have very different social climates. I thought I grew up in a more…what would you say… mature or advanced area. Hmmm I’m pretty sure not many were reading things like that (in my school).Maybe we all weren’t big readers. 

[Melissa Louise]

6 hours ago, Red Dove said:

Where did you go to school? I wonder if different areas of the U.S. have very different social climates. I thought I grew up in a more…what would you say… mature or advanced area. Hmmm I’m pretty sure not many were reading things like that (in my school).Maybe we all weren’t big readers. 

LMD is in AU like me. 

 

[Sneezyone]

8 hours ago, Momto6inIN said:

I didn't feel traumatized by Clan of the Cave Bear as a kid. Quite the opposite. I ate those porn scenes up as a curious pre-teen and re-read them over and over again. Even as a young adult I still re-read them and loved them as a "comfort read".

But as an older adult who can understand that consuming porn creates a warped sexuality, I can also wish that I didn't have those scenes and words in my head and I can recognize that they probably weren't healthy for me.

As for why I read those books in the first place: They were in the public library and I was drawn to fat books because they lasted longer and no one stopped me.

I feel most of this. Yea, they read like rape. I don’t wish the rest of the genre were out of my head tho. They’ve kept our marital relationship spicy and fresh.

[tooelitistformegoeleswhere]

Yes, we censor what they watch, and I hadn't thought about it, but I guess we do censor the reading too.

For mental health reasons, we avoid R-rated movies, horror movies, etc., as well as crime shows like Law and Order: SVU and Criminal Minds. It's never really been an issue. We don't watch a lot of TV anyway, so it's never really been an issue.

As for reading, our local library sucks, and we don't live near a bookstore. My dh and I have to order everything online (or drive four hours to decent bookstore). We don't live in an area with a lot of leisure readers, so they aren't getting peer recommendations. If they did, I think we would vet it and go from there.