Thankful for my family relations

[TexasProud]

Ok ground rules for this thread. ONLY positive experiences please. Feel free to share your positive experiences.

I am grateful for:

A sister, though we haven't really been close until fairly recently that we get along.  We are polar opposites in some beliefs.  We just don't talk about them and concentrate instead on the many, many things we do share.  She has been so incredibly easy to work with as we went through first dad's stuff and now mom. Probably the fact that we have different tastes helps in that what one wants the other wouldn't.  But also the shared value that stuff is just stuff and doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. I am really enjoying getting to know her as we were not close growing up. 

I have the best mother-in-law on the planet. I just do.  My husband still teases her about the time when we were dating and he went home without me and the first words to come out of her mouth were, "I wish xxx could have come." She and my late FIL adopted me from the beginning. I always knew I was safe at their house. There is no tension. There is just love. Everyone is welcome. I sleep better there than anywhere else. His sisters and their families are awesome.  There have never been family arguments. In fact we play games and there is so, so, so much laughter when we get together.  

I know I take that way too much for granted. 

So people with healthy family dynamics, share what you are grateful for. 

Edited October 27, 2022 by TexasProud

[happi duck]

I come from a great family!  My mom was especially amazing!  Miss them every day!

Edited October 27, 2022 by happi duck

[TexasProud]

Did as you ask.  But I am trying only to read positive stuff. So yeah.

[freesia]

I’m thankful for that even though I know ds stayed up way too late last night, he is pleasant and upbeat today. Also, that dd13 is hard at working writing a lit analysis paper that I thought would need me to support her a lot ( bc she’s a bit of a perfectionist).  I don’t care if we need to do a lot of revision, I’m just happy that she made a stab at it without drama. 
 

Also, ds and I have been wrestling with circuits all month and he just got an A on the quiz. I’m not letting him down after all 😃

[lmrich]

I just gave my dad a surprise 90th birthday. His cousins (87 and 85) drove 17 hours to help him celebrate! My cousins (his neices and nephews) flew in. I had not seen them in 10 years.  And my second cousin drove over; we found out she lives  rather close to us. We had an amazing time and made strong re-connections. 

[gardenmom5]

I know you want positives - but because of my relationship with my grandmother and mother when I was growing up/young adult, I really appreciate the relationship with my own daughters.  It's the kind of relationship I wish I had had.  I have really enjoyed watching them and seeing the competent and striving women they have become.

 and a husband who cherishes me still, after 40 years of marriage.

eta: yeah - I love the men in my life too. 😜   I have great sons.  Even dudeling, despite all of his challenges, is still a sweet boy and is making progress.  and a great son-in-law.  I'm currently at 2dd's "Texas house" - we just drove from CA to TX. (their plan is to move back here next year)  dsil is flying in tomorrow. - he's previously told me I can come as often as I want, and stay as long as I want. He loves my daughter and he's a good dad.  He's a keeper.

Edited October 27, 2022 by gardenmom5

[73349]

Just experienced an improvement in a relationship with a sibling.

As much as I disagree with all of DS's grandparents on many things, they do not try to interfere with/undermine my parenting. They respect what we're trying to do.

I enjoy having my DH and DS around a lot. (Good thing, because DH still mostly works from home & we homeschool!)

 

[YaelAldrich]

I'm ecstatic that my father after decades of treating my husband poorly finally saw that he was a good guy and worthy of being in the family! Lol. I had to put up barriers many times in our 25 year marriage; telling my father that we wouldn't interact with him if he kept being mean and disrespectful to DH. All it took was my sister dying! 😳

My father finally realized how much my husband was doing upfront and behind the scenes to support me and our family through the hardships.

My father even asked my DH to come to visit my parents all by himself a couple of months ago. My father took my husband out back and started the conversation, "When you married my daughter, I didn't like you. I didn't think you were good enough for her. Then I saw how you behaved during Nicole's (my sister, of blessed memory) illness and death. I was wrong. You are a great son to me and husband to my daughter. I'm sorry I teared you poorly." My husband almost fell over in shock. 

This did take hard work and introspection from my husband's side as well. He realized he looked down on my parents because they don't have fancy educations and letters after their names. He denigrated all the stuff my father did for work and fun. So my DH really thought about his prejudices and tried to lean in more with an open heart and love. 

[TexasProud]

17 minutes ago, lmrich said:

I just gave my dad a surprise 90th birthday. His cousins (87 and 85) drove 17 hours to help him celebrate! My cousins (his neices and nephews) flew in. I had not seen them in 10 years.  And my second cousin drove over; we found out she lives  rather close to us. We had an amazing time and made strong re-connections. 

How incredibly wonderful!

[SKL]

I have been blessed.

• Mom and dad, very human and humble, but always put their family first.  We had a good childhood and a good example of what love looks like.
• Sisters.  Full of love, always have your back even if you're wrong.  😛  Great to talk to, fun and funny, easy for me to be with.
• Brothers.  Also loving and supportive, although from more of a distance than the sisters.
• We all get along!  We all have a great time together, all the siblings care for our folks and each other and the extended families.

I don't have in-laws, for better or worse.  😛

[Indigo Blue]

So grateful for my two sweet sons and husband. I’m grateful that we can have fun together while also being relaxed and not taking ourselves too seriously. I love watching my sons become interested in things and then share all their knowledge and experience with me. I’ve learned how to make good coffee from one son. They have both taught me gun safety. (I had never shot a handgun ever in my life, and my very first time ever shooting, I hit the target dead center after doing exactly what they told me. Holding the gun just so, standing just so, breathing in, firing while exhaling). One son can name so many plants and birds. It’s so much fun to go on walks with him because he stops and looks at things and tells me things. Dh is oblivious to things like that, lol. He just notices sewer drains and pipes.  😬

They can both play chess well, and I have struggled to learn how to play well enough to beat them. Once, I almost did. I lived on Chess.com for months. At Christmas (year before last), I almost did it. I had checkmate in one move and didn’t see it. Ds pointed it out to me afterward. ♟

Dh likes to walk down the plumbing aisle at Lowe’s just to look at things. We tease him about that. We always say ,”He’s over in the plumbing section looking at basket strainers.”🪠

My husband is a Cowboys fan. Our sons and I are Panther fans. (Well, I really don’t care, but I guess you could call it that). When ds lived in TX, we got to go to a Panther/Dallas game live and in person. Such a treat for Dh. But we mercilessly teased each other that that day was going to be “hiney-whoopin’” day. Panthers won. So, to this day, that day is known in our family as “hiney-whoopin’” day. The great, epic day when we got to beat them on their own turf and got to see it live and in person. And you would not feel sorry for Dh’s not getting to experience his team winning in the Dallas stadium if you knew the level of torture he puts all Panther fans through.  Fair and square. Hiney-whoopin’ day was epic and glorious. 

These are the kinds of things I’m grateful for, and I’m glad I’ve had a chance in my life to experience these! 

 

[Faith-manor]

All of my kids are grown, and they are awesome people whom we truly love to spend time with and who can also be counted on when the chips are down. Our son in law is an excellent father to our grandsons, and our new, soon to be daughter in law, is a real joy. I feel very, very fortunate.  I know so many people who have poor relationships with their adult children, so I feel extra lucky.

I will have our three sons and new dil for Thanksgiving. I am very much looking forward to hosting the holiday for them.

[easypeasy]

I am beyond grateful for my relationship with my grown children - they are wonderful, considerate, purposeful adults and I'm thrilled they consider me a friend and confidant as well as mom. I'm grateful for my bonus kid, who came to us very late in life, but was wrapped in warm hugs from the moment he crossed our threshold. We didn't know we were missing a kid, but once he was here, it was immediately apparent to all of us that he was the missing piece. Adult life has blindsided each of them with some really hard, unexpected knocks, but they're trucking on and I am so proud of each of them.

I am incredibly grateful for a husband who is a truly kind, great, wonderful man. All the best adjectives heaped upon his worthy head. ♥

I am grateful to have recently reconnected with some extended family that I'd grown away from in my child-rearing phase. They live far away and I just didn't have time/energy for extended family connections. It's been wonderful catching up with all of them and I hope to plan a visit next spring or summer.

I'll end it there so it's all sunshine. 🌞😁

[TexasProud]

2 hours ago, gardenmom5 said:

I know you want positives - but because of my relationship with my grandmother and mother when I was growing up/young adult, I really appreciate the relationship with my own daughters.  It's the kind of relationship I wish I had had.  I have really enjoyed watching them and seeing the competent and striving women they have become.

 and a husband who cherishes me still, after 40 years of marriage.

eta: yeah - I love the men in my life too. 😜   I have great sons.  Even dudeling, despite all of his challenges, is still a sweet boy and is making progress.  and a great son-in-law.  I'm currently at 2dd's "Texas house" - we just drove from CA to TX. (their plan is to move back here next year)  dsil is flying in tomorrow. - he's previously told me I can come as often as I want, and stay as long as I want. He loves my daughter and he's a good dad.  He's a keeper.

Oh my goodness. Missed this somehow. Yes, this is EXACTLY what I want.  I love the relationships you describe!

[TexasProud]

1 hour ago, Indigo Blue said:

I are Panther fans. (Well, I really don’t care, but I guess you could call it that). When ds lived in TX, we got to go to a Panther/Dallas game live and in person. Such a treat for Dh. But we mercilessly teased each other that that day was going to be “hiney-whoopin’” day. Panthers won. So, to this day, that day is known in our family as “hiney-whoopin’” day. The great, epic day when we got to beat them on their own turf and got to see it live and in person. And you would not feel sorry for Dh’s not getting to experience his team winning in the Dallas stadium if you knew the level of torture he puts all Panther fans through.  Fair and square. Hiney-whoopin’ day was epic and glorious. 

These are the kinds of things I’m grateful for, and I’m glad I’ve had a chance in my life to experience these! 

 

Oh my goodness, love this. I am a meh Cowboy fan.  I love this kind of interaction.

[TexasProud]

Thank you for sharing everyone.  This is really lifting my spirits! Love all the stories.

[Bambam]

I have a wonderful MIL. When I married her son, she told me that she would never ask him when he was coming home. I was like, "What are you talking about?" She told me that his home was with me now, and that his home was not where he grew up - nor with his parents. I thought that was a nice way of putting it.  

For several years I've spent several weeks at my sister's house to help her recover from various surgeries. She is older than I am, and we've always lived far apart, so I really don't know her. I was thankful for the opportunity for us to get acquainted and spend some time together - even if the circumstances were not ideal.  She isn't the same person she was when we were growing up, and I'm not the same person either. It's nice when you can like family because they are good people. 

[lmrich]

Just adding a new blessing... DD called me today with some of the most beautiful words a 21 year old can say to her mom, "I need your advice mom"

[Not_a_Number]

I'm grateful that DH remains by far my favorite person to talk to and vice versa. He's very smart and a great judge of character and exciting, and he feels the same way about me, and that's never going to change. 

I'm grateful that the work I've been putting into this family has been paying off, and things are largely feeling relaxed and happy around the house. 

I'm grateful I've been able to help bring up my little sister (she's 20 and in college -- 17 years younger than me.) She comes to us for advice much more than she does to her own parents. 

I'm grateful the kids are excited about all kinds of learning and are smart, perceptive, sensitive, and shrewd little people. 

I'm grateful the kids trust me with their feelings and that we can talk openly about their challenges. 

Let me know if these are the right sorts of things, OP! 

[popmom]

13 hours ago, TexasProud said:

Ok ground rules for this thread. ONLY positive experiences please. Feel free to share your positive experiences.

I am grateful for:

A sister, though we haven't really been close until fairly recently that we get along.  We are polar opposites in some beliefs.  We just don't talk about them and concentrate instead on the many, many things we do share.  She has been so incredibly easy to work with as we went through first dad's stuff and now mom. Probably the fact that we have different tastes helps in that what one wants the other wouldn't.  But also the shared value that stuff is just stuff and doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. I am really enjoying getting to know her as we were not close growing up. 

I have the best mother-in-law on the planet. I just do.  My husband still teases her about the time when we were dating and he went home without me and the first words to come out of her mouth were, "I wish xxx could have come." She and my late FIL adopted me from the beginning. I always knew I was safe at their house. There is no tension. There is just love. Everyone is welcome. I sleep better there than anywhere else. His sisters and their families are awesome.  There have never been family arguments. In fact we play games and there is so, so, so much laughter when we get together.  

I know I take that way too much for granted. 

So people with healthy family dynamics, share what you are grateful for. 

This made me tear up a bit-when you said that you sleep better there than anywhere else--that really says something. What a blessing! 

[popmom]

12 hours ago, YaelAldrich said:

I'm ecstatic that my father after decades of treating my husband poorly finally saw that he was a good guy and worthy of being in the family! Lol. I had to put up barriers many times in our 25 year marriage; telling my father that we wouldn't interact with him if he kept being mean and disrespectful to DH. All it took was my sister dying! 😳

My father finally realized how much my husband was doing upfront and behind the scenes to support me and our family through the hardships.

My father even asked my DH to come to visit my parents all by himself a couple of months ago. My father took my husband out back and started the conversation, "When you married my daughter, I didn't like you. I didn't think you were good enough for her. Then I saw how you behaved during Nicole's (my sister, of blessed memory) illness and death. I was wrong. You are a great son to me and husband to my daughter. I'm sorry I teared you poorly." My husband almost fell over in shock. 

This did take hard work and introspection from my husband's side as well. He realized he looked down on my parents because they don't have fancy educations and letters after their names. He denigrated all the stuff my father did for work and fun. So my DH really thought about his prejudices and tried to lean in more with an open heart and love. 

Now I'm crying. That is beautiful.

[popmom]

49 minutes ago, Not_a_Number said:

 

I'm grateful the kids trust me with their feelings and that we can talk openly about their challenges. 

Let me know if these are the right sorts of things, OP! 

This is me, too. I am so grateful for (mostly) open and honest lines of communication with my dds. I'm grateful for growth--in each of us.

[Emba]

I have been very blessed to have healthy and loving family relationships. Of course I had the normal tensions of the teenage years and young adulthood, but my parents both have been supportive of my marriage and have accepted my adopted kids as completely as their biological grandchildren.  A large part of our income now is because of a business that my Dad helped DH get started in while we were still dating ( not financially, but teaching of skills). 
 

my in-laws have always been great. My MIL unfortunately passed away last year. I said at her funeral and more importantly, said to her before she died that I never had any reason to complain about my mother-in-law, and many of the small things that bothered me were too much of a good thing - for example, she would try too hard to make sure everything was just right for everyone at family gatherings, too much time agonizing over just the perfect gift for the kids. She was always very respectful of the space we needed as a married couple and was a great example to me of how I hope to be with my future children-in-law. My FIL is a man of immense integrity, and I really admire him for that.