To weigh or not to weigh...

[Kassia]

I lost about forty pounds and have kept it off for 18 months (within a five-ish pound range).  I weigh myself every Saturday, but skipped it for a few weeks after vacation last year and also during the holiday season because I knew I had put on weight during those times.

 

Last Saturday was my birthday and I overindulged a lot.  I did well with my eating for most of the rest of the week, but did have a few slip-ups.  My guess is that my weight will be up by a pound or two if I weigh myself tomorrow morning.  Should I bother weighing myself?  I'm afraid the number on the scale will upset me all day (I have a history of eating disorders), but maybe I should see how much damage I actually did.  Maybe it's not as bad as I think or maybe I'll learn that I have to be very consistent.  

 

Just wondering what others would do in this situation...

 

 

 

 

[kewb]

If it was me, no.  But I don't weigh now.  I go by how my clothes fit.  Otherwise I obsess over the number on the scale.

[Teachaheart]

If I were in your position, I would skip weighing myself tomorrow, focus on healthy eating and exercise for the next week, and resume weekly weigh-ins next week because a poor result on the scale tomorrow would provoke negative thought patterns and self-sabotaging behavior.

[Kassia]

If it was me, no.  But I don't weigh now.  I go by how my clothes fit.  Otherwise I obsess over the number on the scale.

 

Thanks!  That's what I'm leaning towards, but I keep wondering what the darn number will be.  I'm going to obsess either way, but I'm afraid the actual number will upset me even though I know it will go back down as long as I go back to my normal eating routine.  

[Kassia]

If I were in your position, I would skip weighing myself tomorrow, focus on healthy eating and exercise for the next week, and resume weekly weigh-ins next week because a poor result on the scale tomorrow would provoke negative thought patterns and self-sabotaging behavior.

 

Thank you!  :)  I am going to skip weighing and try to let it go.  

[nd293]

Weigh yourself. You know there will probably be a gain and you know you can fix it because you've done it before (well done!). One day at a time and you'll be back where you want to be.

 

But then I weigh myself every few days and use it as a reminder not to go overboard. That works for me, but not for everyone. I don't think hiding from a problem works for anyone, though... If you're motivated to eat healthily without the scale, then skip the scale, but if you're hiding from a visible reminder that you need to take action, facing up to it is better.

[kiana]

With a history of eating disorders I'd tend to avoid it. Even if you know it's water weight from an overindulgent day it's really hard not to fixate on that number. 

[Guest]

I always give myself a week back on plan before weighing. That's a happy medium.

[Pawz4me]

I've had a diagnosed eating disorder. The best thing I've done is to start weighing every single morning and tracking it on an app. I use Happy Scale but there are lots of others. Weighing every day and getting used to normal fluctuations while also using an app that "smooths out" the fluctuations (by calculating a rolling average) helped take away the power of the number on the scale to,influence my mood.

[Mrs_JWM]

I have a history of disordered eating as well. One of the best days I've had was when I threw away my scale. It was scary, but I did it. Hugs, my friend.

 

Sent from my XT1049 using Tapatalk

[regentrude]

I do not find a weight fluctuation of 1-2 lbs in any way meaningful. My weight regularly fluctuates up to 5 lbs within my cycle. 2lbs more one day means nothing, just as 2 lbs less does not mean anything either.

I see no benefit in weighing weekly. I would weigh in at a different number every time, even though my weight remains stable within a 5lb  fluctuation range over many years.

You know whether your jeans are tight or lose. That is all anybody needs :)

Edited September 10, 2016 by regentrude

[Pawz4me]

I do not find a weight fluctuation of 1-2 lbs in any way meaningful. My weight regularly fluctuates up to 5 lbs within my cycle. 2lbs more one day means nothing, just as 2 lbs less does not mean anything either.

I see no benefit in weighing weekly. I would weigh in at a different number every time, even though my weight remains stable within a 5lb  fluctuation range over many years.

You know whether your jeans are tight or lose. That is all anybody needs :)

 

I can't emphasize how much I personally disagree with the bolded.

 

When my thyroid was in the process of going wonky and I knew that something was wrong with me but couldn't put it all together . . . at that point in my life I wasn't weighing at all at home. I noticed no difference at all in how my jeans fit. They were NOT tight. But when I went to the doctor for my yearly check up I had gained 10 pounds. Which for some people wouldn't be that much, but I'm super short. Percentage wise it was a huge gain for me. My very tall doc claimed it would have been the equivalent of 50 pounds on him (although percentage wise I'm positive that was a wee exaggeration ;)).

 

Some of us really cannot always detect a significant weight gain by how our clothes fit. Some of us have medical reasons for needing to note even small (but real) fluctuations in our weight.

[Carrie12345]

If you KNOW a "bad" number will put you in a fragile place, don't do it!!!  You know you indulged, you know you've done better, and I'm guessing you intend to continue doing better.  That's everything you need to know.

 

Me, I would weigh. But I find motivation (however knowingly misplaced) in the scale, whatever it might say.  My wiring and reaction is different.  Intentionally bringing myself down would be self-sabotage. 

 

 

[Joyofsixreboot]

Gently, either way it's bugging you which is probably more important to know than the scale number. You worked hard to get to a healthy weight and have a right to enjoy that and be mindful of maintaining it. Statistically those who regularly weigh are more successful with maintenance so...maybe move weigh in to Friday mornings. It avoids those weekend weight blips and keep in mind fluctuation of a few pounds is normal and healthy and weight is not health, kindness, worthiness or love. :grouphug:

[nd293]

Some of us really cannot always detect a significant weight gain by how our clothes fit.

I agree with your disagreement :-)

 

As I fit comfortably into my jeans, for instance, it's going to be at least 5kg before they're uncomfortable. And it's a lot more difficult to lose 5kg than it is to note a 500g fluctuation and be reminded about portion control and skipping the biscuits. I think most of us who weight often are very aware of fluctuations based on the 'bulk' v calories of meals, hormones, time of last meal, even insomnia. It's not about the specifics of a number, it's about encouraging ongoing mindfulness of healthy habits.

 

I love the idea of an app that smooths out fluctuations - I'll look that one up.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I have not weighed myself in a zillion years.  I won't even stand on the scale at the doctor's office.  It just drove me absolutely nuts.  I think it can be a useful tool, but if it becomes an obsession and source of anxiety I don't think it is worth it. 

 

 

[Night Elf]

I'm glad you're skipping the weigh-in today. I think if the number has increased by more than what you expect to see, you'll ruin your day. Get back to your normal way of eating and consider weighing in again next weekend if weighing in makes you feel better.

[Spryte]

I would skip this week, and get back on track for a week.  There is not point putting yourself into a negative spin.  Then, I'd start something like Pawz' plan with the app that smooths out the daily, normal fluctuations but still shows the overall trend.  That is an excellent idea.

[SKL]

I would wait a week.  :)  I agree, go with how your clothes feel.

 

This thread is fun for me because I quit weighing myself about 2 years ago.  I always liked to say I'd never been over 140 lbs.  I knew I had gone over it one day after over-indulging, and decided I could still say the above as long as I didn't look at the scale and got right back to it.  Problem is, with perimenopause my clothes just kept getting tighter.  Now I seem to be going in the right direction, but I'm afraid to check.  :p  I will probably be 130 before I dare step back on the scale (if that ever happens).  :p  I'm glad I'm not the only person afraid to look!  ;)

Edited September 10, 2016 by SKL

[Kassia]

I couldn't resist and ended up weighing this morning.  It went as expected, but I'm fine with it.  I guess calories DO count on your birthday!  ;)  

 

I go back and forth about whether weighing is a good thing or not.  I find that if the number is higher than I expected, I get upset and frustrated.  If the number is lower than expected, then I will sometimes end up bingeing thinking that I can get away with more food (or maybe that I need more food).  

 

But sometimes weighing is helpful to me because I feel as if I've gained weight and seeing the number reassures me that I actually haven't.  There have been times when I've gotten upset thinking that I've gained and then I get on the scale and the number is fine.  My brain plays tricks on me and makes me think that I'm getting wider or flabbier or whatever when that's not the case.  

 

It's all so complicated!  I wish I could be like my DH who never thinks about weight/body size.  He eats what he wants and when he wants and it's not a big deal.  He's been about the same weight since I met him almost 31 years ago.  It's never an issue.  For me, I think about food/size/exercise/weight 24/7.  

 

Thanks so much to all of you for sharing your advice and opinions!  I am always so touched by all the help and support given here.  <3

 

 

 

[regentrude]

 For me, I think about food/size/exercise/weight 24/7. 

 

I find this very concerning and unhealthy. Are you getting professional help dealing with this?

I am wondering whether not weighing might be a beneficial step in lessening this obsession.

 

Edited September 10, 2016 by regentrude

[maize]

obsessing constantly about weight seems unhealthy to me as well.

[Kassia]

I find this very concerning and unhealthy. Are you getting professional help dealing with this?

I am wondering whether not weighing might be a beneficial step in lessening this obsession.

 

 

It is unhealthy.  I've struggled with disordered eating for as long as I can remember.  I was just talking to a friend about it recently - saying that I was happier when I was heavier and not so obsessed with food/weight/body size/exercise.  It's a struggle pretty much every minute of every day.  I am not getting help, but I know I should. 

[wintermom]

It is unhealthy.  I've struggled with disordered eating for as long as I can remember.  I was just talking to a friend about it recently - saying that I was happier when I was heavier and not so obsessed with food/weight/body size/exercise.  It's a struggle pretty much every minute of every day.  I am not getting help, but I know I should. 

 

Remember that you are still at the tail of the transition period of losing a lot of weight, and have been on maintenance for just over a year. It can take quite a while to figure out how to balance eating, exercise and weight, and different seasons can quickly change things. 

 

I don't think it would be unusual at all to be thinking about this topic on a daily basis. We have to eat many times a day, we're doing some kind of exercise, and we're putting on clothes.  I'm sure you have a million other things you think about on a daily basis as well. Perhaps your personality is more along the lines of strong focusing on an issue, rather than relaxing.  Maybe you can take your focus and shift it away from the weight/scale number, and put that focus on something more positive that you have more direct control over, such as steps per day, miles of walking/running per week, or laps of a pool.

[Kassia]

.  Maybe you can take your focus and shift it away from the weight/scale number, and put that focus on something more positive that you have more direct control over, such as steps per day, miles of walking/running per week, or laps of a pool.

 

I am a compulsive exerciser (must go along with the eating) so I am already doing that.  I run and lift weights daily, and wear a pedometer to track my steps.  

[wintermom]

I am a compulsive exerciser (must go along with the eating) so I am already doing that.  I run and lift weights daily, and wear a pedometer to track my steps.  

 

Fits right in with your weight fixation, perhaps?  Maybe you need a focus shift to something non-quantifiable, like music or art. Something that you can relax, do for pleasure, and not worry about losing, gaining, "winning" and such. 

[Kassia]

Fits right in with your weight fixation, perhaps?  Maybe you need a focus shift to something non-quantifiable, like music or art. Something that you can relax, do for pleasure, and not worry about losing, gaining, "winning" and such. 

 

I think it's a control issue.  I can control how far I run, how much weight I can lift, how long I can spend on exercise (unless family obligations get in the way), etc.  With food I'm either in control or out of control.  Being out of control makes me feel bad about myself.  

[Kassia]

Hugs.

 

Eating issues are tough. 

 

Have you ever tried CBT ? It helps with reframing the way we think about these things. Relatively few sessions can help, it's not like counselling,which can go on forever and a day...

 

I haven't.  I just can't see finding the time/money to see someone and I know that disordered eating can be a very stubborn problem - especially for someone like me who has struggled for forty years.  But I would love to be free.  Years ago, I read a book about eating disorders that described a woman who was obsessed with her weight for her whole life.  She said her headstone would say, "Wanted to be thin."  It made me so sad that someone would waste their precious life over something so silly, but here I am doing the same thing.  

[Mrs_JWM]

CBT was immensely helpful for me.

 

Sent from my XT1049 using Tapatalk

[SemiSweet]

I could have written your posts. :grouphug:

[maize]

My grandmother has struggled with eating disorders her entire life.

 

Now that she has dementia, she seems to have forgotten that she is supposed to keep herself thin. She is actually enjoying food for the first time.

[Kassia]

I could have written your posts. :grouphug:

 

I am sorry.  There are too many women out there wasting too much of their lives on this.  

 

 

My grandmother has struggled with eating disorders her entire life.

 

Now that she has dementia, she seems to have forgotten that she is supposed to keep herself thin. She is actually enjoying food for the first time.

 

I am sorry about your grandmother's dementia.  Interesting how she's enjoying food now.  

[shukriyya]

This is a good place to start if you're not getting professional help. It might create some inner space for you and a tiny bit of distance between the ED and your identification with it. Because, of course, you're more than your ED but when it's chronic it tends to be how we identify ourselves and giving that up can feel very disorienting and downright scary. There is a companion workbook coming out in the Spring though this book contains lots of exercises to do as well. Hugs to you on your recovery journey. 

[Kassia]

This is a good place to start if you're not getting professional help. It might create some inner space for you and a tiny bit of distance between the ED and your identification with it. Because, of course, you're more than your ED but when it's chronic it tends to be how we identify ourselves and giving that up can feel very disorienting and downright scary. There is a companion workbook coming out in the Spring though this book contains lots of exercises to do as well. Hugs to you on your recovery journey. 

 

Thank you!  I will definitely be getting this book!