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Prayers for my dad, please


AimeeM
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He's only 55. He's been feeling faint and just not himself. He went to the ER about a week ago, they referred him to a cardiologist and neurologist. He went in to see the cardiologist and had an echo and stress test, both of which turned out abnormal. He went in today (outpatient) for a catherization (sp?) to see if it was an artery that was blocked or collapsing, and it isn't that. We were all sort of praying that an artery would be the issue, because his cardiologist gave positive remarks about the outcome, if that WERE the case. His concern for my dad's issues are much more serious now that it's been proven not to be an artery issue. I'm not privy to the lot of information as I do not speak to Toxic-Person (his wife, my stepmother), so I've only been getting second hand information from my aunt (dad's sister). He sounded so tired the last time I spoke with him. He hasn't been able to work in weeks (and my father ALWAYS works - we joke that he'll work until the day after he dies).

 

He's never been one to take care of himself really. He's a heavy smoker (think several packs a day) and he enjoys his wine a bit too much, but he's... the most amazing man, other than my husband, that I know. He's selfless, generous, a hard worker, ethical, affectionate and... well, he's my daddy. I adore him. I even miss the smell of his clothes right now; the diesel grease, cheap deodorant, dove soap, gojo, and cigarette smoke that always clung to him when he hugged me. He tucked me into my bed until the day I married and moved out. He coached my soccer teams. He took the door off my bedroom when I started sneaking in cigarettes and being a rebellious brat. He was an amazing father DESPITE never having that himself - he grew up in state orphanages and foster homes. I miss him so much and I want to be there with him so badly.

 

I can't imagine life without him, even though he lives far away now with psycho-lady, and I'm so SCARED.

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I'm so very sorry to hear about your dad, Aimee. :(

 

I wish his wife wasn't so toxic, but do you think she loves him and has his best interests at heart, and that she will ensure that he gets the best possible care?

 

I'll pray for him! :grouphug:

I don't know. I think she does love him on some level. I think she loves ME and my sisters for that matter - to whatever extent she is able.

Do I think she'll cause him stress regardless? Probably. Do I think his health will decline even further if he's told that he can't work for whatever reason, because I know from past experience that staying at home with her every day makes his blood pressure sky rocket? Yes.

He loves working. If he's told he can't work I'm afraid things will get worse for him. He's already been off for weeks and he's miserable.

 

Blessedly, he's as stubborn as ever. Apparently he spent his inpatient time arguing with the nurse about sedation and then arguing with his cardio about the need for him to quit smoking :p We all know he needs to stop doing these things, but to hear that's his normal ornery self is reassuring to me.

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I just want to say that he sounds like a wonderful dad!! Also, there are a lot of things that can cause dizziness and fatigue that are completely treatable. Praying for the best!

I think the concern is the results of the echo and stress test. They weren't good at all. For whatever odd reason, they haven't done an EKG yet... which surprised my husband. The doctor seems very concerned but wasn't able to schedule that until a couple weeks out?
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I think the concern is the results of the echo and stress test. They weren't good at all. For whatever odd reason, they haven't done an EKG yet... which surprised my husband. The doctor seems very concerned but wasn't able to schedule that until a couple weeks out?

I see. Even heart-related issues -- though scary -- can be very treatable. My father had similar symptoms about 20 years ago, and went through a series of heart tests. It turns out only 50% or so of his heart was even functioning normally. He also needed a pacemaker.

 

That was 20 years ago and he is 85 now, still going strong! He goes cross-country skiing about 3 days/week in the winter, mows his own lawn, shovels snow, travels. Hasn't slowed him down a bit! He also only officially retired two years ago.

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I see. Even heart-related issues -- though scary -- can be very treatable. My father had similar symptoms about 20 years ago, and went through a series of heart tests. It turns out only 50% or so of his heart was even functioning normally. He also needed a pacemaker.

 

That was 20 years ago and he is 85 now, still going strong! He goes cross-country skiing about 3 days/week in the winter, mows his own lawn, shovels snow, travels. Hasn't slowed him down a bit! He also only officially retired two years ago.

That is VERY comforting. Which tests did they use to dx that? Silly question - I'm sure you don't remember. I'm just getting frazzled because they seem concerned... but taking their sweet time scheduling out his tests :(
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That is VERY comforting. Which tests did they use to dx that? Silly question - I'm sure you don't remember. I'm just getting frazzled because they seem concerned... but taking their sweet time scheduling out his tests :(

Sorry, I don't remember which tests he had... I'm sure they were very thorough though, since my brother is a pulmonary cardiologist so he would've made sure no stone was left unturned!

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