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[Guest inoubliable]

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[Flowing Brook]

:grouphug: I am sorry about all of this for you. :grouphug:

[Juniper]

(((((hugs))))) I am so sorry! This mortgage/credit situation is such a nightmare!!!!!

[PachiSusan]

No advice, but hugs. I hope things work out for you.

 

We are in the same position: medical bills that went to collection without our knowledge and a bankruptcy. It will be forever and a day before we can qualify for a mortgage because DH is also unemployed. I'm told it's a minimum of2 years employed before we can get a mortgage. Hey - I guess that means all the other stuff will finally drop off before then!!! LOL

[Lisa in SC]

I'm familiar with this level of frustration and when it has happened to us, I also feel overwhelmed with how that kind of uncertainty makes me feel. Honestly, to put it bluntly, it just plain sucks. I'm so sorry this is happening to you!

[*Lulu*]

Oh my word; that would make me feel frustrated enough to sit in the closet screaming and bummed out enough to eat a can of double chocolate frosting when I was all screamed out. I am so sorry. ((Hugs))

 

I do not know if this will help, but when something is overwhelming me I get out a note pad and make a list. I list everything I am upset about, everything I want to change, and anything that is draining my mental/emotional energy. I go back through it and question each item. Can I change it? If the answer is yes then I make a plan of action. If the answer is no I ask myself if I can do anything to mitigate its impact on my life/thoughts. If the answer is yes then I make a plan of action. If the answer is no I ask myself if this thing is really 100% outside my control. If the answer is yes I move on. I chose to focus my energy and time on the items on my list I can change or control the impact of and release* the things that truly are outside my ability to control any part of.

 

 

 

*Okay, I know it sounds a little silly, but it works for me. Sometimes I release it through prayer, sometimes through tearing up the paper I wrote the stuff down on, sometimes by just telling myself that I am letting it go. It also helps me to follow this up with an activity that allows me to be intentionally in the moment instead of in my own head.

[unsinkable]

Oh, fudge...that really stinks. I hope that you can find a decent rental 'til then.

[ashfern]

:grouphug: What a pain in the butt.

[Orthodox6]

:grouphug: I feel stupid (because I am ignorant in this area), but could the VA help you at this late date?

[dbmamaz]

sorry - how frustrating! big plans, big derailment.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I'm glad that the second Mortgage Guy (or was he the first) is helping you find a new rental.

[songsparrow]

Can you sit tight for a couple of days until the listing on the house you're currently in is up on the realtors' listing service? Then you can see what asking price your landlord has placed on the house, see if it's a pre-foreclosure or short sale, and ask the realtors you're working with to give their opinion on the price that your landlord is asking for the property, and how long they think it will take to sell. Depending on how long properties are sitting on the market in your area, and if your landlord prices it high, it may not even sell before October.

 

I'm guessing from what you've said about your landlord that he should want you in the apartment until it sells because he needs the income (so long as you cooperate with showing the apartment, and keep it neat so it shows well). If he's thinking reasonably, it's ideal for him that you have a month-to-month lease, because if the buyer wants to keep you as a tenant he doesn't have to do anything, and if the buyer wants the property vacant, he will deliver your 30-day notice after the contract is signed with a vacancy date before the closing. Your landlord is unlikely to find a replacement tenant if you leave while the house is on the market, and presumably he won't find anyone willing to take a month-to-month tenancy under those conditions, so he should want to keep you there as long as possible.

 

In the meantime, you can search for back-up options in case your landlord does serve your 30-day notice (e.g., short-term rentals or extended-stay hotels, cost to put a bunch of your stuff into storage for a few months) and keep looking at houses and looking into mortgage possibilities. But if you can stay in your current apartment until you find a place to buy, it saves you all of the costs of moving to another apartment (security deposit / first & last month's rents / realtor commission / moving costs).

[UrbanSue]

So sorry.

 

If it's any consolation our dream-house-that-got-away is STILL on the market two years later. Could happen. Or maybe there's a better one out there. Lots will come on the market in the summer.

[Catwoman]

Could you approach the owner of the house you love and ask if they would consider a lease/purchase type of deal on the house? You could pay rent for several months or a year (or whatever,) and then you would be able to buy the house as soon as the mortgage thing was settled.

 

Also, is there another lender that might give you the mortgage?

[tearose]

Ugh, so sorry to hear about the uncertainty. Just to be safe, I guess I'd look for another rental--but I think Catwoman's suggestion is really worth a try.

[delaney]

Ugh. Mortgage stuff really stinks. We are in an upside down house and I would love to do a refi......but the house will not appraise at what we owe. Lovely. So we are one of the responsible american families that pays bills yet cannot get a better rate. If we were to stop paying they would stand up and notice. The good guys almost always get screwed it seems. :glare:

[Guest inoubliable]

Thanks, guys. :crying: <--- tears of thanks-for-being-so-supportive-and-I'm-so-emotionally-raw-it-makes-me-cry

 

To answer a few:

- Medicaid won't go back and pay for the stuff they just ignored all those years ago. I tried to get them to pony up when I first found out they'd dropped the ball and it was already too late, then. So that's out. I really do either have to wait it out, or pay it off. It makes sense to just wait it out.

 

-I'm digging the thought of double chocolate ANYthing and writing out lists. I'm a list-maker. It's my thing. It comforts me. I need a fresh pad of paper. And a nice clicky pen. I called DH. He said "tell the girls thanks. I'm on it!" So. Look at that. Valentine's Day, indeed.

 

-Super shocked that it was the first Mortgage Guy that called today after all that silence. He's the one looking for rentals for us. He knows our landlord personally and understands EXACTLY what's going on here. He's all over reporting the landlord and getting us out until we can move, if it's possible. I'll know more Monday, I hope.

 

-If Mortgage Guy can't find us anything by end of next week, we're going to sit tight. I'm looking at extended-stay hotels for an "emergency" situation if we get a notice to vacate. Still no active listing on the MRIS for this property that we're in right now. Both the realtor and Mortgage Guy say that doesn't matter. Neither one thinks it will sell before the end of the year, even if it's listed tomorrow. I'm trying to trust that.

 

-If this house *does* get listed, I won't even try to purchase it. The landlord would know I'm good for it. However, in the 2.5 years that I've been here, I KNOW what's wrong with it and how much it costs to live here (utilities) and a good idea of what it would take to fix it up. Plus. The neighbors suck. So... no. I wouldn't want to get stuck owning this place. I'd rather live in the pop-up in the Walmart parking lot.

 

-UrbanSue, thanks. I don't want to hope too much that our house will be available when we are, but it would be nice. In the meantime, we're moving ahead with plans we had in place before seriously going for a house. We're building up even more savings, paying off the van and a few other things, and just biding our time. By October we'll qualify for twice what we qualified now (or would have...), according to some quick numbers Mortgage Guy ran. We may be looking at nicer houses by then. :)

 

Thanks to everyone for the encouragement and support. I think I'm okay now. It just all came out of nowhere. Neither mortgage person caught this seemingly huge defect in his credit until today. We were all set to be under contract this weekend and were making plans to pack and looking at new appliances. It's very hard to back out of that mental place.

[Mnemosyne]

Keeping my fingers crossed for you. Hopefully all this hoopla will get sorted out sooner rather than later.

[Catwoman]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

I was hoping you might be able to rent the house you really want, so it would still sort of be yours right away, and that you could buy it when the mortgage stuff got straightened out. Are you sure the owners wouldn't go for it? It's not like they wouldn't have a committed buyer, and they'd still be making money every month on the house.

 

Sorry to nag you about this. I was t really hoping there might still be a way for you to get the house. This is so disappointing! :(

[Reflections]

First: EEP! What an awful time 6 years ago.!!!

 

Can you write a letter to the credit agency and get it taken off your report?

 

I hope your mortgage guy can help you out.

 

:grouphug:

[Granny_Weatherwax]

:grouphug:

[Guest inoubliable]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

I was hoping you might be able to rent the house you really want, so it would still sort of be yours right away, and that you could buy it when the mortgage stuff got straightened out. Are you sure the owners wouldn't go for it? It's not like they wouldn't have a committed buyer, and they'd still be making money every month on the house.

 

Sorry to nag you about this. I was t really hoping there might still be a way for you to get the house. This is so disappointing! :(

 

Ohhhhh. I think I'll ask the realtor. That didn't occur to me. It's owned by a holding company that is local. I have on idea how that would work, but I'll definitely ask if it's an option.

[Spryte]

Oh, how heartbreaking! I'm sorry.

 

Your second post in this thread sounds better though... Like you have a plan for chocolate, pen and paper, and some good ideas about what comes next. Ugh. Just wish you didn't need that!

 

I do like Catwoman's idea about approaching the other house's owners. It's an idea.

 

Whatever happens, Oct is not far off, really. Hang in there!

[vonfirmath]

I just want to scream for you. Staying where you are, even if it stays available, is just really frustrating for 10 whole more months!

[Unicorn.]

. We're building up even more savings, paying off the van and a few other things, and just biding our time. By October we'll qualify for twice what we qualified now (or would have...), according to some quick numbers Mortgage Guy ran. We may be looking at nicer houses by then. :)

 

 

 

 

And there is the door that opened, when the window closed!

 

I'm sorry this fell through (can't believe they're holding medical against you), but come fall, you might end up in a better house, in a much better neighborhood!

[BrookValley.]

Oh, how frustrating. And upsetting. Hope things look better soon!!

[Desert Rat]

Man, that stinks, KK. It's so disappointing to be ready to move ahead and improve your lot and to be told to hold on almost a year.

[Juniper]

 

Ohhhhh. I think I'll ask the realtor. That didn't occur to me. It's owned by a holding company that is local. I have on idea how that would work, but I'll definitely ask if it's an option.

 

This is what we are thinking about doing. http://homeguides.sfgate.com/lease-purchase-agreements-work-8023.html

 

You are in an even better position as you will qualify in Oct. Try to get a letter from the Mortgage guy stating that he believes you will qualify then and present that and the Lease purchase offer through your realtor. It might work!

[Guest inoubliable]

Excellent! Thanks for the link! I'm going to call the realtor tomorrow morning and see if we can sit down and work up some sort of offer to lease.

[Juniper]

Excellent! Thanks for the link! I'm going to call the realtor tomorrow morning and see if we can sit down and work up some sort of offer to lease.

 

 

I just checked my email and the mortgage company I contacted had already written up a nice little letter for me.

 

In our case it is a two year waiting period. We negotiated the sale price up front, pay for an inspection, and pay a set rent per month. A certain amount from this is collected for a future down payment. We do put a little more down up front, but we are starting with offering $1000 down and going up from there. I won't be accruing equity for two years, but I will get the the value increase that is forecasted for this area plus whatever I put into the home.

 

I am talking things over with my Realtor having them run my payment through a title company. The title company will then issue a receipt to the homeowners that I paid the mortgage and I will have the piece of mind in knowing that they won't just stop paying their mortgage and I am out in the cold. The title company will collect my down in a separate account. Again, this is all in the "discussion" phase, but these lease purchases have come a long ways! You need a Realtor that can sell YOU and your situation.

 

((((hugs)))))

[Guest inoubliable]

I just checked my email and the mortgage company I contacted had already written up a nice little letter for me.

 

In our case it is a two year waiting period. We negotiated the sale price up front, pay for an inspection, and pay a set rent per month. A certain amount from this is collected for a future down payment. We do put a little more down up front, but we are starting with offering $1000 down and going up from there. I won't be accruing equity for two years, but I will get the the value increase that is forecasted for this area plus whatever I put into the home.

 

I am talking things over with my Realtor having them run my payment through a title company. The title company will then issue a receipt to the homeowners that I paid the mortgage and I will have the piece of mind in knowing that they won't just stop paying their mortgage and I am out in the cold. The title company will collect my down in a separate account. Again, this is all in the "discussion" phase, but these lease purchases have come a long ways! You need a Realtor that can sell YOU and your situation.

 

((((hugs)))))

 

 

Thank you so much for the particulars! I'm including some of this in the email to my realtor. Oh, this would be WONDERFUL if they'll consider it!

[Juniper]

You do not have to go through a title company with the payments. Heck, I am not even sure that the Title companies up here will go for it, but we are going to give it a shot! It is helping us that my Realtor is a transplant from a harder hit metro area and has prior experience doing this. It is almost unheard of here, but becoming more of an option.

 

I really feel like the Government needs to step in and give those of us who are in these situations (fought really hard/banks that added to the trouble) a do over if we can prove that we maintained our credit in other areas besides this one or things directly related to it. The last few years have been extremely hard on so many people and getting us back into home ownership is a major societal advantage in my book!

[Guest inoubliable]

Yes! In our case, we have over 6 years of fantastic credit history. Everything on time. New accounts opened. Credit limits increased. Some things paid of ahead of time. And before that, we had several years of good credit history since the bankruptcy. I wish there were some government program that would look at the medical collections in context and see this. We've more than shown our credit worthiness and proved that we learned our lesson when we filed bankruptcy almost 10 years ago!

[MercyA]

No advice, just more :grouphug:. So sorry you're going through this.

[Truscifi]

:grouphug: Hopefully they'll be willing to do a lease-purchase.

[MomtoCandJ]

Also ask about land contract. That is how we got our house. We had bankruptcy 5 years ago and was able to do it.

[Clarkd]

So sorry to hear of this set back. Maybe you can get into a better rental situation with their help? Moving twice would be hard, but if it were a better rental it would be more comfortable to stay a bit longer? Trying to find a bright side...

Thinking ofyou and your family and sending good home energy to you.