Sleeping in same bed as spouse

[Giraffe]

Musical beds here, but we try, so I answered yes. If only DD wouldn't get so "lonely"!

[Dandelion]

Yes.

[peachskittles]

I voted other because it's a bit complicated. We've been together six years. For the first few years we slept together. Then I decided I didn't like sleeping with him so I slept on the couch. We moved again and ended up sleeping together for a bit. Once we moved here, we slept together for a few months, then he started sleeping on the couch. Now I sleep on the other couch so our bed isn't used at all. We will be moving again soon (hopefully) and then I think we will try the sleeping together thing again. My problem is sometimes I need touch and other times I don't. He is an all or nothing type of person, so it complicates the matter. My mom and dad didn't sleep together for a good portion of the time I lived with them growing up, so it doesn't seem unusual to me.

[Carrie12345]

Sorry, I voted other!

I'd say it's 50/50 these days. We love each other lots, but we also love our own space and weird sleep habits, lol.

When we're not sharing a bed, he's usually in the living room, though I have been known to hit the couch if he decides to watch a boring movie in bed or starts snoring real loud.

[fairfarmhand]

Not only do we sleep in the same bed, but it is only a full size bed. We can't sleep without touching. A few years ago we thought we would 'upgrade' to a bigger bed and there was too much room and we couldn't sleep. I cannot imagine sleeping in a different bed, much less a different room (and dh snores something terrible).

We have a Queen, but we only sleep on half of it. I cuddle right up next to him and just about run him off the mattress. He says if he ever joins the navy he will be right at home on a nuclear sub bunk with his arm almost hanging off the edge. He's a good sport, although he sometimes jokes about getting up in the night to go round to my side of the bed so he won't be so crowded.

[BigMamaBird]

Yes, we sleep in the same bed. Though, to be honest, he's a HORRIBLE snorer and I sleep so much better if I can get to sleep before he does. So he often stays up late to watch Star Trek or Star Gate or Star Whatever and I go to bed which is fine with me.

[aggie96]

We start out together, but play musical beds every.single.night. :( Because I haven't slept through the night in almost 8 years, I do NOT like anyone touching me if I'm actually getting to sleep. I LOVE staying in hotels with a King bed because it is the only time I get to sprawl in an abyss. :) Plus I like the ceiling fan on, no light sources at all, no TV, a big down comforter. He dislikes all of those.

[azucena]

Other - we start in the same bed, but 90% of the time one of us moves to the couch in the middle of the night!

[higginszoo]

I had to vote other, because it's really about half and half recently. My dh doesn't like it when I leave, but he's a snorer, and staying was resulting in completely sleepless nights for me. So usually I migrate to the (somewhat) quieter guest room (I sometimes have to put the radio on in there to drown out his snoring).

 

Currently, our youngest is occupying the guest bed,(she has a top bunk in the girls' room usually, but had surgery and needs a lower bed for the moment), so I'm kind of stuck in my bed, and between getting up to take care of the little one and coming back to the chainsaw in my bed, I am really, really sleep-deprived. Sometimes when the guest bed isn't an option, I'll take a mild sleep aid, but as Mr. Chainsaw sleeps like the dead and 'baby' needs middle of the night care right now, that really isn't an option.

[horsellian]

Yes! We normally sleep together in our (UK) double bed (unless I've got a sick kid in it with me, then DH is is the spare room).

 

However, my parents always used to sleep in separate single beds pushed up together, so they had separate mattresses, and separate duvet covers. It was one of those things that you think is normal as a kid, and then get a surprise when you find out that it's not how anyone else (or at least, anyone else I've ever come across) does it!

[2girls4us]

Yes. The only times we don't is if one of us is terrible sick, the well one will sleep in the guest room. Or if one of the girls is having a bad night and needs one of us in their room, then one of us switches with one of the girls.

[Pamela H in Texas]

We go through periods of time where we aren't in the same bed. Usually, that has meant he'll sleep on the couch. In the last couple years, we've had a second bed in our room a couple times that one of us could use (though recently it has been covered in clean laundry piles). Mostly, we've been in the same bed though....despite the issues.

[FaithManor]

Same bed - first five years was a full size, now it's a queen. We've been married almost 25 years. I am so used to him, I can't sleep when he's not here. His week in Germany was the equivalent of 10 sleep years lost - at least that's what it felt like! :D

 

Faith

[Melissa in Australia]

Same bed - first five years was a full size, now it's a queen. We've been married almost 25 years. I am so used to him, I can't sleep when he's not here. His week in Germany was the equivalent of 10 sleep years lost - at least that's what it felt like! :D

 

Faith

 

that is what it is like for me. When DH is in Canada I can hardly sleep. I have found that filling up a few hot-water bottles and putting them on his side of the bed helps. I guess I must reach out in the night, and if he isn't there I wake up.

[Tap]

For the most part we do not sleep together and have not in 8 or so years. He snores. I am a night owl and he is early. If I walk in the room late at night, he will sit straight up in bed and take in a huge gasp of air, like I just scared him horribly. I often sleep with an ice pack and that is not fun for someone else to find in the bed. If we have company, we will sleep togetherr or if we are traveling and need to for logistics.

 

I don't regret sleeping apart, I regret not doing it sooner.

[caroljenn]

Yes, but not every single night. Hubby plays softball on Wednesday nights with a bunch of guys so that night he usually sleeps on the couch because he needs to mellow out before he comes to bed. He almost always falls asleep while mellowing out.

 

Sometimes he will get up at 4 and not be able to sleep, and he goes out to the couch then too.

 

He's afraid to wake me up- I'm a bear when someone wakes me up (I wouldn't want to wake me up either) so it's much better to head out to the safety of the couch! =P

[tex-mex]

Ok. I am a bit strange. My husband snoring works like white noise to me. When he is having a hard time sleeping I can't fall asleep. But when he starts to snore, out I go! When he isn't home it take me forever to sleep.

Join the club! :hurray:

 

I'm the same way. If my hubby is traveling for work... I cannot sleep without his snoring. Now that he is on a CPAP machine for his sleep apnea, it is hard for me to sleep without some noise.

[Reya]

We used to sleep on a double. The kind of pain my back would be in now if we did that.... *shudders* When not pregnant or with a newborn, we MOSTLY sleep together, but if I'm not sleeping well or am in pain, I bail. So I picked "other."

[KungFuPanda]

Every night. We're snugglers. We start with my head on his shoulder and my leg thrown over him, then 'just' as we're really, truly about to sleep, I roll over and we spoon. Dh snores occasionally but I sleep like a rock, fall asleep first, and wake up last so I have no trouble sleeping. We've always had a queen bed, but sleep fine in a double if we need to.

 

As snuggly as we are, I have NO trouble sleeping alone if one of us is away or fell asleep on the couch. I am a gifted sleeper and can will myself to relax my muscles, slow my breath, and fall to sleep quickly. It's a life skill!

[Melissa in Australia]

Every night. We're snugglers. We start with my head on his shoulder and my leg thrown over him, then 'just' as we're really, truly about to sleep, I roll over and we spoon. Dh snores occasionally but I sleep like a rock, fall asleep first, and wake up last so I have no trouble sleeping. We've always had a queen bed, but sleep fine in a double if we need to.

 

As snuggly as we are, I have NO trouble sleeping alone if one of us is away or fell asleep on the couch. I am a gifted sleeper and can will myself to relax my muscles, slow my breath, and fall to sleep quickly. It's a life skill!

:001_wub: :001_wub: :001_wub:

[SFM]

Yes, unless he's deployed, although his snoring makes me question this set up sometimes. ;)

[Laura Cook]

We always sleep in the same bed unless one of us falls asleep on the couch or is away. For several years we usually ended up with a couple kids in bed with us also until we decided I wasn't getting enough sleep with them in there and worked to get them in their own beds. DH goes to bed before I do and I usually snuggle up against his back for a bit until I get too hot. That man is like a furnace! I like to be cold when I sleep. I can sleep when he isn't there though too. I can sleep anywhere, anytime. I think that is the only reason I survived the baby/toddler years! Oh I love my sleep!

[MissKNG]

Usually here...dh often falls asleep on the couch.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

NO! I'm a very light sleeper, and I need my sleep. The snoring keeps me up sometimes even when I'm in the other room.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

To be fair, it's not just dh. I can't sleep in the same room as any other adult. I can fall asleep with my kids, but still don't sleep as well as I would by myself. On my scrapbooking weekends, I have to get a single room. If I share with my mother, my sister or my best friend, I don't get any sleep at all. Cub Scout camping trips were a nightmare for me. ALL THOSE SNORERS AND LOUD BREATHERS IN ONE CABIN . . . AAAAAACCCCKKKK! :scared: :D

[Mom23Boys]

Always, unless he is working nights. Then, he gets in as I get out. He is a rotating shift worker and works a total of 7 nights in a 5 week period, so we are usually together.

[SKL]

I voted for my parents, since I'm not married. ("No.") I have lots of other friends who eventually migrated to sleeping separately. Often it's because of a medical / physical issue that either makes both parties need completely different kinds of beds, or makes it too hard to sleep if there is the least little disturbance. Sometimes it's because the marriage isn't what it used to be, but they still want to stay together as friends or whatever.

[MAIMOM]

We have always slept together ( 20 years now). The kids were welcome to make a pallet in our room but the bed is for DH and I only. This weekend we were at a retreat with a king sized bed....neither of us slept very well. My DH says he felt like he spent all night searching for me.....we do touch in the night but mostly we do it in our sleep....just knowing the other is there. Ear plugs are our friends! He wears them if I am snoring and I wear them if he is....or one of us turns around and sleeps at the end of the bed....

It took me a few weeks when we first got married to get used to sleeping with him...now I have a very hard time when he is not home. He was gone for work for a year.....I did get used to sleeping in the middle of the bed while he was gone but loved having him home again!