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Sleeping in same bed as spouse


milovany
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Sleeping in same bed as spouse -- oui o non?  

401 members have voted

  1. 1. If you're both home, do you and your spouse usually sleep in the same bed?

    • Yes
      337
    • No
      55
    • Other, but really -- it's not a hard question. Focus on the words "if you're both home" and "usually." And note that TeA is not mentioned. This is about actual sleep. ;-)
      9


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Not only do we sleep in the same bed, but it is only a full size bed. We can't sleep without touching. A few years ago we thought we would 'upgrade' to a bigger bed and there was too much room and we couldn't sleep. I cannot imagine sleeping in a different bed, much less a different room (and dh snores something terrible).

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Not only do we sleep in the same bed, but it is only a full size bed. We can't sleep without touching. A few years ago we thought we would 'upgrade' to a bigger bed and there was too much room and we couldn't sleep. I cannot imagine sleeping in a different bed, much less a different room (and dh snores something terrible).

And we are the exact opposite :D. I would prefer to sleep in our king-sized bed all alone. If i'm actually sleeping, please don't touch me. Consider yourself warned.

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We attachment parent so sometimes I end up with a kid who can't sleep. RIght now my boy is 2 so we play musical beds a lot. If I had my preference I would be with the dh every night. King sized bed, don't touch me if I am sleeping (poor dh) but close enough that I can put my feet on you if they are cold. he he! My dh is a patient man!

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Not only do we sleep in the same bed, but it is only a full size bed. We can't sleep without touching. A few years ago we thought we would 'upgrade' to a bigger bed and there was too much room and we couldn't sleep. I cannot imagine sleeping in a different bed, much less a different room (and dh snores something terrible).

 

That's us too! Full-size bed.

 

We learned to roll in sync.

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Love your "other" option. :D

 

Yes, we sleep in the same bed. Honestly, we probably shouldn't, LOL!! DH is an early riser, I'm a night owl. (As you've probably noticed by the hours I tend to be here on the boards.) He snores, and we disturb each other going to bed and getting up.

 

Plus... we have a king size bed, and there's STILL not enough room. When it's just the two of us sleeping quietly, fine. But then the dog gets on the bed and sprawls sideways... then DS wanders in around the crack of dawn to cuddle and snooze before getting up for the day (don't get me wrong, love that he still does this!)... and I generally wake up smashed in the middle of everyone like a sardine, sweating half to death because these creatures are all SO warm-blooded!!!

 

Some nights, I wish for a big beautiful bed, with lots of pillows and soft blankets and cool sheets, all to myself... in my own room... in my own cottage on the beach. Really, it's not much to ask for, is it?? ;)

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Not only do we sleep in the same bed, but it is only a full size bed. We can't sleep without touching. A few years ago we thought we would 'upgrade' to a bigger bed and there was too much room and we couldn't sleep. I cannot imagine sleeping in a different bed, much less a different room (and dh snores something terrible).

 

 

We have just a double bed, too. I wouldn't want it any other way, and it would make me incredibly sad if we couldn't sleep together and wake up together. Just thinking about that makes me sad. :crying:

 

YMMV, of course.

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We sleep together. The one night in our whole marriage that I went to the couch, dh was deeply disturbed. It was actually quite the upset.

 

I love our king-sized bed! It made co-sleeping so much more doable. Now that we're out of that time of life, I enjoy being able to sprawl. :) But I hate the nights when I wake up and he still isn't home from work (works noon to midnight). He snores so loudly but I push at him, he startles himself, and I catch a moment to fall asleep before the train comes through the station again. :D

 

We were an oddity at one time though. We couldn't sleep with one comforter. We each had our own because we had no ability to share. Then, when we decided to sell our last house, we bought a new bed set and I convinced dh to just try sleeping with the same blanket. Because of that, I, the culprit, learned how to roll over without stealing the blankets. It's been great ever since! Occasionally when he has the opportunity to go to bed first, he teases me. I think he's asleep (I really should learn!) and can't get the blanket out of his grasp. I slightly tug, trying not to wake him. Then all of a sudden, I hear a deep giggle from his side of the bed. Then I punch him, he laughs louder, and I get my portion of the covers. :D

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I voted no. However, the question really isn't that simple, so I probably should have voted "other". Like I mentioned in the other post - we play musical beds around here. Some nights that means DH and I actually get to sleep together. :) This is also very recent. Prior to the past few (maybe 6ish) months, we slept "traditionally" - DH and I in our bed, kids elsewhere.

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We share a bed, but don't sleep all that well together. Thus my posting at this time of the morning... The first month of marriage, I don't think I slept at night at all. I just don't like having someone in my bed! I think a king sized would make things better. I think I would like that...

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Not only do we sleep in the same bed, but it is only a full size bed. We can't sleep without touching. A few years ago we thought we would 'upgrade' to a bigger bed and there was too much room and we couldn't sleep. I cannot imagine sleeping in a different bed, much less a different room (and dh snores something terrible).

That is so sweet. I love my dh, but neither of us can sleep if we're touching or close enough to feel the other shift in bed. He would prefer seperate bedrooms. We settled with a king.

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I voted other. We have a family bed which is two queens on the floor pushed together. My husband and the cats usually sleep on one, and the little man and I sleep on the other. Sometimes we switch it up. :) So, it's kind of the same bed, but they're two different mattresses. It's not terribly pretty, but I absolutely love our giant bed.

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I would LIKE to sleep in the same bed. We did for many years....but I need SLEEP. I am a much better wife and mother when I am well rested. My husband doesn't sleep well. He moves constantly. He is a fidgeter. The bed shakes and jolts all night long and he kicks in his sleep!

 

Right now we have separate rooms. We are strongly considering two twin beds that we can push almost together. I would love an ERGO Tempurpedic, but they are $7K. You can have those separated or put together.

 

I am concerned about him waking me up at 5am though as our master bath has the sink outside of the bathroom so the light and noise will be there at 5am.

 

I am a very light sleeper.

 

I love my husband very much. I love him more when I am well rested.

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Yes, unless he's deployed we have for 15 years. We have a queen, we thought of a full, but dh is 6'1" and in a full his feet stuck off the end. They actually still do sometimes on the queen. I'm a night owl, dh is an earlier riser due to his job, it's never been an issue even if I'm up reading to watching tv at 3 am, I think learning to sleep under the catapults that launch the planes on an aircraft carrier has made him immune to all things when he sleeps.

 

We also co-slept with our kids in this size bed, not always the most comfortable, but we loved every minute of it. Occasionally my 7.5 year old will still come in and ask to snuggle at night, and I cherish those moments.

 

Now in the beginning I did have to "train" him to not try to burrow under my pillow at night. It was a little weird at first, he would push his head under my pillow during the night, so I had to break him of that habit. LOL

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We sleep together in our California King. When the babies were in our bed we were prevented from actually touching/snuggling most of the time but now that phase is over and I like to have our feet touch at least. We get a bit of snuggling but my dh can't fall asleep that way. He finds me to hot to be that close too, literally I mean, lol, he says I radiate heat. I don't know why I'm always cold then. :D

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Not only do we sleep in the same bed, but it is only a full size bed. We can't sleep without touching. A few years ago we thought we would 'upgrade' to a bigger bed and there was too much room and we couldn't sleep. I cannot imagine sleeping in a different bed, much less a different room (and dh snores something terrible).

 

 

 

This is us. But we have a queen because we needed to make room for the kids that are always in there (Yep, one is still there most nights, and I sleep in the middle). :D Even still, it's an always touching thing.

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Had a post - then my 'puter crashed :-( Between hubby's insomnia and snoring and leg jerks every 30 seconds (and since he can't get back to sleep if woken so I can't nudge him to stop snoring or jerking or he is awake until dawn )and my need to sleep sitting upright (carpel tunnel - my arms go numb if I lay down) and needing to hop out of bed twice a night to pee....we simply sleep better in separate rooms.

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Yep, every night. Dh snores like a bear and has restless leg syndrome, so we have a deal that he can't come to bed until I'm already asleep.

 

I tried this - but I wake up twice a night to pee - and then his jerking snoring would keep me awake so I'd resentfully grab my pillow and head elsewhere, and lay awake fuming for a bit. Now I simply start out elsewhere and sleep a lot better!

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I voted no, but the "usually" wording is hard. Currently, we are co-sleeping because college kids are home and all the other beds are taken. It seems to be working - most nights. His snoring and tossing is keeping me up but not as badly as usual. We'll see how long it lasts and I expect that once the kids go back to school, I'll find my way into one of their beds.

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Ok. I am a bit strange. My husband snoring works like white noise to me. When he is having a hard time sleeping I can't fall asleep. But when he starts to snore, out I go! When he isn't home it take me forever to sleep.

 

My mom is like you. She prefers to hear my dad snoring.

 

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We used to but now we are on opposite schedules. I leave for work when he gets home and don't get back until he's already gone. But prior to that if he was home he always slept in the same bed. Even if he went to bed super early I would lay down with him until he fell asleep.

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My husband rarely snores but if he does, it doesn't bother me at all. Most likely that's because I have two dogs sleeping in my room, a pug and a sharpei, so it's always like sleeping in a den of bears.

 

When we're on vacation and my dogs aren't with us, I have a hard time sleeping. They are my white noise.

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And we are the exact opposite :D. I would prefer to sleep in our king-sized bed all alone. If i'm actually sleeping, please don't touch me. Consider yourself warned.

 

Same here! I hate being touched when I'm sleeping! James Bond liked when we had a queen bed, but I hated it. He's a sleep thrasher (made worse by PTSD), and was constantly waking me up. We got a king Tempurpedic mattress and I can barely feel it when he moves. Yay! We usually hold hands above our pillows (we're both side sleepers) when we first go to bed, but other than that I do not want to be touched. I'm trying to sleep!

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If i'm actually sleeping, please don't touch me. Consider yourself warned.

 

 

:iagree: And I can't fall asleep if dh is touching me at all. Even just a hand against my back. I'll lie there awake until one of us moves. Dh thinks that's weird because I *could* sleep when dd climbed in the bed and smooshed herself against me. I don't know why I could sleep then but not when it's dh but that's just how it is.

 

I voted yes, same bed.

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No. My husband is an incredibly light sleeper with insomnia. So, he sleeps on a daybed in the basement where he gets to wrap himself up in his own blanket and sleep undisturbed. I get the King Size bed to myself....and all the interruptions throughout the night that come from having 3 kids!

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My husband and I haven't slept in the same bed for more than 10 years. It started out as his choice (he preferred falling asleep watching TV) and in the past few years he made some noise about coming back to bed with me. I let him try once or twice but couldn't sleep so I told him it was too late and he could keep the sofa. In my defense, I don't think it would have lasted anyway-- he would have gone back to the TV. It used to really bother me but now I prefer it. The only real negative is that it's COLD sleeping alone compared to with someone else. I sleep with five blankets and a space heater in winter.

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