Rebecca VA Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Nance, shouldn't your signature say: DD20 - Special Needs School (Life Skills/Special Olympics) DD11 - Oak Meadow 6 (Eng., Hist., Sci.), SOTW1, TT 6/LoF Fractions, Meet The Masters. DS6 - Some Oak Meadow K, Funnix Beginning Reading. Reading Eggs -- Precocious Pre-Zygotes in Training! Ask me how I do it! instead of: DD20 - Special Needs School (Life Skills/Special Olympics) DD11 - Oak Meadow 6 (Eng., Hist., Sci.), SOTW1, TT 6/LoF Fractions, Meet The Masters. DS6 - Some Oak Meadow K, Funnix Beginning Reading, Reading Eggs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Boy did I pick the wrong night to go grocery shopping! Last night was a FUN night around here!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bethben Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I've noticed that no one is thinking of training their daughter's ovaries. Please please make sure that the next generation has a chance! My daughter is almost five. It just pains me that she's had a whole five years where I haven't been training my grandchildren. I guess "Better Late than Early". Beth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted March 15, 2012 Author Share Posted March 15, 2012 Nance, shouldn't your signature say: DD20 - Special Needs School (Life Skills/Special Olympics) DD11 - Oak Meadow 6 (Eng., Hist., Sci.), SOTW1, TT 6/LoF Fractions, Meet The Masters. DS6 - Some Oak Meadow K, Funnix Beginning Reading. Reading Eggs -- Precocious Pre-Zygotes in Training! Ask me how I do it! instead of: DD20 - Special Needs School (Life Skills/Special Olympics) DD11 - Oak Meadow 6 (Eng., Hist., Sci.), SOTW1, TT 6/LoF Fractions, Meet The Masters. DS6 - Some Oak Meadow K, Funnix Beginning Reading, Reading Eggs. :lol::lol::lol: love it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted March 15, 2012 Author Share Posted March 15, 2012 I've noticed that no one is thinking of training their daughter's ovaries. Please please make sure that the next generation has a chance! My daughter is almost five. It just pains me that she's had a whole five years where I haven't been training my grandchildren. I guess "Better Late than Early". Beth Ouch, Beth. That really sobered me up. You're absolutely right though. Today when I homeschool my 11 year old, I am totally going to homeschool her ovaries, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Aw. He's smart! If my preconception is a girl, maybe they should meet! I'm sorry, but he's already engaged. A perfectly lovely pre-zygote. It's not that we're racist or anything, but we do insist our children marry Canadians. They cannot be Prime Minister if they're living in the States, and the opposition could make a stink over their spouses being American. Gotta think of these things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted March 15, 2012 Author Share Posted March 15, 2012 I'm sorry, but he's already engaged. A perfectly lovely pre-zygote. It's not that we're racist or anything, but we do insist our children marry Canadians. They cannot be Prime Minister if they're living in the States, and the opposition could make a stink over their spouses being American. Gotta think of these things. Nods. I understand! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 My kids are freaking geniuses. Ok...you know...at least to me...(once they pull the french fries out of their noses and stuff). Your kids can't be geniuses, because if you give them french fries you must also give them TT, which we all know produces subhumanoid dolts. Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Your kids can't be geniuses, because if you give them french fries you must also give them TT, which we all know produces subhumanoid dolts. Tara Hmmmm..... TT equals Teaching Textbooks? Or Tater Tots? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Hmmmm..... TT equals Teaching Textbooks? Or Tater Tots? Teaching Textbooks. ;) Although, I do love the Tater Tots! We occasionally go out to a place that serves dollar Tots on Wednesdays. Mmmmm, tots ... Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I heard Tater Tots had real toddlers in the ingredients. Hence the 'Tots' part of the name. Just sayin'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I heard Tater Tots had real toddlers in the ingredients. Hence the 'Tots' part of the name. Just sayin'. What? They're not vegan?!? Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I don't know how the toddlers were fed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 My youngest is 6. Do you think it's too late for him? Anyone selling this used? Anyone? Helloooo.... LOL!!! If you find 2 copies, will you PM me, please??? I could use it for my just-turned-7 yr old. (or did I just commit board faux paus (sp???) for admitting my 7 yr old is not reading at any level....???) (...and for not knowing how to spell faux paus and here I am definitely older than 7...) :lol: :lol: :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I don't know how the toddlers were fed. The important question is whether GMOs were involved. It's all about the GMOs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belacqua Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I don't know how the toddlers were fed. I always insist upon grass-fed Girl Scouts in my Thin Mints. Much mintier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I don't know how the toddlers were fed. :lol: Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebecca VA Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 What about eggs in the zygotes? Organic ones, of course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angie in VA Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 LOL!!! If you find 2 copies, will you PM me, please??? I could use it for my just-turned-7 yr old. (or did I just commit board faux paus (sp???) for admitting my 7 yr old is not reading at any level....???) (...and for not knowing how to spell faux paus and here I am definitely older than 7...) :lol: :lol: :lol: I got this used for a song on Amazon. Check ebay too. I saw one for a bit more than what I paid, but it had free shipping. :lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I've noticed that no one is thinking of training their daughter's ovaries. Please please make sure that the next generation has a chance! My daughter is almost five. It just pains me that she's had a whole five years where I haven't been training my grandchildren. I guess "Better Late than Early". Beth I am TOTALLY FREAKING OUT HERE! I don't have daughters!!! Do you think it's possible to start homeschooling my sons' t*stes? I mean, I don't want my grandchildren to be behind any of your grandchildren. I started late with my own kids. They were about 15 week fetuses when I began reading to them. Now, I'm afraid my poor grandchildren will not be accepted at Ivy League schools because I haven't prepared my boys' future seeds. And I should probably arrange marriages for them, too, so that I can make sure my future in-laws are on the ball with training their daughters' ovaries. NOW WHO WAS OFFERING THOSE ZYGOTE FLASHCARDS? I don't know which sends me into more inner torment, that my left ovary is neurotypical or my right ovary supremely gifted. Can I read them both the same books? :lol: Figures. No outlets for socialization. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted March 15, 2012 Author Share Posted March 15, 2012 I am TOTALLY FREAKING OUT HERE! I don't have daughters!!! Do you think it's possible to start homeschooling my sons' t*stes? I mean, I don't want my grandchildren to be behind any of your grandchildren. I started late with my own kids. They were about 15 week fetuses when I began reading to them. Now, I'm afraid my poor grandchildren will not be accepted at Ivy League schools because I haven't prepared my boys' future seeds. And I should probably arrange marriages for them, too, so that I can make sure my future in-laws are on the ball with training their daughters' ovaries. NOW WHO WAS OFFERING THOSE ZYGOTE FLASHCARDS? LMAO :lol::lol: :smilielol5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bethben Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 I am TOTALLY FREAKING OUT HERE! I don't have daughters!!! Do you think it's possible to start homeschooling my sons' t*stes? I mean, I don't want my grandchildren to be behind any of your grandchildren. :lol: No, I don't think your sons will qualify. After all, they are not born with all those future grandchildren just waiting to pop out. So, of course, we have to make sure our zygote teaching really appeals to ONLY girls. This of course follows that all of us with boys should now start match-making with those girls whose mother's taught them right. I see a match-making site developing just because of this. If anyone has a good name, I can get right on that. Beth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 Oh pulease. You aren't reading to your ovaries at this point? Your kid is pathetically behind. So don't worry, your kid will be dumb and neglected like the rest of them. Well....my mother read to MY ovaries since my own birth, just to give the future grandkids a head start. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kardamom Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 I am so thrilled to have stumbled across this forum and thread this evening! I was delaying conception plans while on the 2-year waiting list for a prestigious academic pre-conception zygote school. It never occurred to me that I could begin now at home! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K&Rs Mom Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 :lol: Whoever put the "well trained ovaries" tag on, you made my night! :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 I always insist upon grass-fed Girl Scouts in my Thin Mints. Much mintier. I think that's what's gone wrong w/Girl Guide cookies. They're nowhere near as good when I was a Guide. Bet it's all the preservatives and prepkg'd food they're feeding Guides these days :glare: As for schooling a boy's t*stes...If he, like Boo, came from a Well Trained Ovary, he's already specially gifted. Plus, we only have TeA while listening to intellectually stimulating audio books, conferences, cds, etc. And have great works of art in a slide show over the bed, as well as other secret methods that I cannot disclose for creating both WTOvaries and SuperSp*rm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 :lol::lol::lol: Oh, I had a rough day today at work and this thread made my day. I am already reading to my dd9's ovaries in hopes that her progeny-to-be will be ahead of the game....and we are getting our chicks in a couple weeks so will teach those grandchildren-to-be how to catch chickens, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 :lol: My family thinks I'm out of my mind right now with the wild laughter. My 7 year old's ovaries are behind. Excuse me while I introduce them to quantum physics .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 I see a match-making site developing just because of this. If anyone has a good name, I can get right on that. Beth I'm quite taken with Well Trained Ovaries, as stated in the tag. Then the competing site can be the Unschooled Ovaries. You know, for THOSE types. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 Plus, we only have TeA while listening to intellectually stimulating audio books, conferences, cds, etc. And have great works of art in a slide show over the bed, as well as other secret methods that I cannot disclose for creating both WTOvaries and SuperSp*rm. OH! All this time I thought "TeA" was just a randomly chosen euphemism. Now I see that it is specific to people who are interested in Targeted Educational Acts. Or something like that. T*sticular Education Association? Training Eggs Agressively? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyontheFarm Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 This group is a hoot!:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 I am so thrilled to have stumbled across this forum and thread this evening! I was delaying conception plans while on the 2-year waiting list for a prestigious academic pre-conception zygote school. It never occurred to me that I could begin now at home! Aren't you lucky! :D OH! All this time I thought "TeA" was just a randomly chosen euphemism. Now I see that it is specific to people who are interested in Targeted Educational Acts. Or something like that. T*sticular Education Association? Training Eggs Agressively? :lol: Literally snorting over here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 OH! All this time I thought "TeA" was just a randomly chosen euphemism. Now I see that it is specific to people who are interested in Targeted Educational Acts. Or something like that. T*sticular Education Association? Training Eggs Agressively? Sorry, but that's part of the secret I cannot reveal. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theYoungerMrsWarde Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Bringing this thread back because thanks to the forewarning I received through this thread, I have now started teaching my 13.5 week fetus's ovaries. I don't know yet if it's a girl, but if it is, her children will be ahead of the game tremendously. If it's a boy, then I'm going to need that support group ;) This is a PSA zombie thread revival for those who NEED this information! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I'm brewing more feti w/peni. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
k2bdeutmeyer Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I'm WAY behind the game with my 33.5wk-er. Must step it up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I'm WAY behind the game with my 33.5wk-er. Must step it up. Too late. If you didn't start w/Well Trained Ovaries, you'll be lucky if your kid can walk and chew gum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Well, I don't have a girl, but if I did I can promise you that her eggs would not be reading. No, I would expect them to be in training to be zygotes at home. Just think of the flower arraigning lessons! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
awisha. Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Too late. If you didn't start w/Well Trained Ovaries, you'll be lucky if your kid can walk and chew gum. Now that made me laugh out loud for reals :smilielol5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grover Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 you people are insane :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleIzumi Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Technically, my ovaried baby has been listening in on school for the last several months, so she should be okay. Right? Right?!?!?!?!?! Wait, I forgot that we don't do Latin OR Greek here. Drat. She'll only know mathematics and science and some phonics. Foiled again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 :( I was afraid of that. Maybe there's a center I can take my ovaries to where someone can show me special flash cards and lists or something. Nice! I hope it comes in a Teaching Textbooks type format, where I can just set my uterus up at the computer, because, you know, I don't have time to do that stuff myself. hehe. Cr*p. I was feeling good about myself. Now I feel like a real slacker. Well, this board will do that to you. :lol: I'm sorry, but you are woefully behind. My Grandmother began reading classics in utero to my Mother, in order to prepare my mother's eggs , that I might come out as advanced as I did, to increase the chances of my kids being geniuses. I read to my daughter's eggs as well before she was born. Can't start too early for those grandchildren...and you are still thinking about children? Sigh. :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtoamiracle Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 oh. my. goodness! funniest thing I've read in a LONG time!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
La Texican Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 There's a Baby Grand Piano App on the iPad just for feutuses to kick out a tune thru your belly, but you better Hike the Apalacian trail or that Oriental Mt. Fuju, or how else will your preschool application stand out enough for your child to get into the preschool that feeds into Harvard? Book smarts isn't enough... your fetus needs a life story too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mama27 Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 Funniest thread ever!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagle Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 What grade should I say my unborn child is in when people ask? Do I go by her age and say 0, or do I go with the level of work she is doing, which is grade 9? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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