BillieBoy Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I really, really don’t want to start any drama, but I do have a question or two regarding some recent posts. How does the hive deal with someone threatening to hurt themselves? Has this happened before? Is there any way for the moderator or anyone to get in touch with them in real life to ensure that a person is safe? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Interesting question. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MtnTeaching Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Also concerned about the daughter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillieBoy Posted December 22, 2011 Author Share Posted December 22, 2011 Also concerned about the daughter. Me too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MtnTeaching Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Also concerned about the daughter. Definitely not trying to start THAT conversation again. Just an added question about someone threatening bodily harm on an internet chat/forum and there is "possibly" a child present. My guess is, there is probably no way to follow up on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillieBoy Posted December 22, 2011 Author Share Posted December 22, 2011 I once had this happen to me on Facebook, and it was an a former grade school person that I knew I loooong time ago. I found some people that were closer to him and sent a message to anyone that knew his phone #. Turns out he was drunk and okay, but the concern is always there. But, with the hive we are only really virtual friends and not many people know each other IRL. It just scares me that someone (anyone) could be hurt, with hundreds of people knowing about it, and nothing was done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I left for dinner and came back to the deleted thread. While eating, I did have thoughts about her being half serious. I certainly hope not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 We had kind of proposed a buddy system a while back but it did not take. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5LittleMonkeys Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Well, a person who is banned can still read right? So perhaps just giving some words of encouragement and support would be helpful. I'm sure that pictures of kilts and recipes are extremely unhelpful to someone who might truly be screaming out for some compassion and understanding. I don't know, maybe I'm just super sensitive to someone that's hurting having been there recently myself. aoakes 01 @ comcast. net in case someone needs to chat.:grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpe Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Unfortunately very little can be done. I don't remember what information was required when we signed up, but even if it included address or phone number one could easily lie. Assuming th information is not available or is wrong, the administrators could contact the poster's internet service provider (based on IP address) and solicit them for the poster's personal information. However that could take weeks or months to be approved if it is at all. If the poster is going to harm themselves or others it would be long since done before we knew who they really were. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillieBoy Posted December 22, 2011 Author Share Posted December 22, 2011 ... maybe I'm just super sensitive to someone that's hurting having been there recently myself. :grouphug: I'm sorry. I can not relate, but I don't think you are overly sensitive. We are all human beings. What good are we if we can not show compassion to one another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwg Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I think what bothered me was not knowing.....the thread just disappeared. So hopefully some kind words were said to the OP, a link send with 24 hour help or something and she was not just cut off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Once again, I have no idea what happened, but I hope everyone is okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 for me personally, and I could be quite wrong, but I felt that the hurt wasn't true when the meanness kept being lashed out. I truly hope nobody is hurting so bad that they would consider hurting themselves. Nobody was banned that I can see. :grouphug:to anyone hurting.:grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleWMN Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I don't know but - and I'm stating this gently - joking and carrying on in a thread after a post like that is not the right answer. There's always a chance it's just drama but there's always a chance it's not. If anyone hurting is reading this, I'll say again to reach out to someone - PLEASE. The holidays can be so hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillieBoy Posted December 22, 2011 Author Share Posted December 22, 2011 I think what bothered me was not knowing.....the thread just disappeared. So hopefully some kind words were said to the OP, a link send with 24 hour help or something and she was not just cut off. :iagree: I tried to post a message on her stat page, but was kicked out? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleWMN Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 for me personally, and I could be quite wrong, but I felt that the hurt wasn't true when the meanness kept being lashed out. I truly hope nobody is hurting so bad that they would consider hurting themselves. Nobody was banned that I can see. :grouphug:to anyone hurting.:grouphug: Actually, she IS banned. I just tried to send a PM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I don't know but - and I'm stating this gently - joking and carrying on in a thread after a post like that is not the right answer. There's always a chance it's just drama but there's always a chance it's not. :iagree:you are right. I did partake and I should not have. I didn't take it serious when things got so ugly, but taking a break to go eat dinner made me think about it, and I truly hope Elizabeth is feeling ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 (edited) Well, a person who is banned can still read right? So perhaps just giving some words of encouragement and support would be helpful. I'm sure that pictures of kilts and recipes are extremely unhelpful to someone who might truly be screaming out for some compassion and understanding. I don't know, maybe I'm just super sensitive to someone that's hurting having been there recently myself. aoakes 01 @ comcast. net in case someone needs to chat.:grouphug: There are times when you get a feeling that you're having the wool pulled over your eyes. The situation in question was not one of them for me and I have really acute troll-dar. I think a little compassion goes a long way. The poster in question was shown some from a few, but was blasted by others and especially by the Powers That Be quite blithely. It's too bad, really. There are a lot of people here who have been through, and are going through, a lot of $#!t, and who don't mind sharing a bit of strength with a fellow traveller. Lately, the mods have been so touchy that even doing that is becoming difficult. Edited December 22, 2011 by Audrey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwg Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 :iagree: I tried to post a message on her stat page, but was kicked out? I think once you are banned you can't receive them? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 well she sounds pretty tech savvy so she will probably read while not being logged in. :grouphug:Elizabeth. I hope you find healing, happiness and peace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 for me personally, and I could be quite wrong, but I felt that the hurt wasn't true when the meanness kept being lashed out. I truly hope nobody is hurting so bad that they would consider hurting themselves. Nobody was banned that I can see. :grouphug:to anyone hurting.:grouphug: Really? You've never had experience with someone lashing out in pain yet not at the person causing the pain? :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CAMom Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I hope you're OK, Elizabeth.:grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Really? You've never had experience with someone lashing out in pain yet not at the person causing the pain? :confused: on the board - no, not that I know of. eta: the degree to the meanness was taken as pot stirring to me, but like I already said, I think differently now and wish Elizabeth well. I truly do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I don't know but - and I'm stating this gently - joking and carrying on in a thread after a post like that is not the right answer. There's always a chance it's just drama but there's always a chance it's not. If anyone hurting is reading this, I'll say again to reach out to someone - PLEASE. The holidays can be so hard. :iagree: That is how the kilt joke started...everyone piled on a poster who said she was leaving...and one thing led to another. I didn't think that was funny then nor do I think it is funny now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MHowell Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 Obviously I missed something big today, but I hope whom ever it was has found some peace, whether in the form of professional help or just a kind ear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennsmile Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 I know a link was sent to a suicide help line before it got deleted and I pm'd her before her ban with an email she can reach me at if she needs to talk/vent. It is sad and I hope she finds peace this Christmas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillieBoy Posted December 22, 2011 Author Share Posted December 22, 2011 I know a link was sent to a suicide help line before it got deleted ..... That's very good to know. Thanks for sharing and caring. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5LittleMonkeys Posted December 22, 2011 Share Posted December 22, 2011 It's too bad, really. There are a lot of people here who have been through, and are going through, a lot of $#!t, and who don't mind sharing a bit of strength with a fellow traveller. Lately, the mods have been so touchy that even doing that is becoming difficult. I don't know, I get why her last two posts were deleted...she was breaking the rules. And honestly, maybe it's best that she was banned so maybe she can step away from the board and realize that what goes on in this tiny part of the virtual world shouldn't have such an impact on her life. However, I wish she could still receive and communicate through pms so that those of us who are wanting to reach out to her and help could do so and help her to calm down. There is far more to her pain and anger than a few posts about presents and to me it was obvious. For someone to lash out so dramatically and so out of character should have been a flag to us. I'm praying that she can find someone to listen to her without taking her words as a personal attack and attacking back. If you can read this Elizabeth...:grouphug: and I'll put it out there again. aoakes 01 @ comcast .net (without the spaces). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Retired Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 I have worked with plenty of suicide patients. The first thing we were taught is someone may talk suicide but if they have a plan HOW then they are serious. The holidays is a major time for us to see suicide attempts. I really want anyone reading this board to know people care. I care and please call one of the many helpline. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwg Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 :iagree: That is how the kilt joke started...everyone piled on a poster who said she was leaving...and one thing led to another. I didn't think that was funny then nor do I think it is funny now. :iagree: I have been wondering why that is.....other boards I have been on the accepted protocol was to flag the post and ignore it. The post received no attention. Kinda goes on and on and on otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annandatje Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 (edited) There are times when you get a feeling that you're having the wool pulled over your eyes. The situation in question was not one of them for me and I have really acute troll-dar. I think a little compassion goes a long way. The poster in question was shown some from a few, but was blasted by others and especially by the Powers That Be quite blithely. It's too bad, really. There are a lot of people here who have been through, and are going through, a lot of $#!t, and who don't mind sharing a bit of strength with a fellow traveller. Lately, the mods have been so touchy that even doing that is becoming difficult. :iagree: I am very concerned for Elizabeth in MN. We privately discussed the long term psychological effects of relentless extreme poverty, particularly when it is coupled with other life stressors. I have no doubt whatsoever that she is authentic and that at least part of the misunderstanding is due to cultural differences that probably very few people here are familiar with. It is difficult to explain succinctly, especially when I lack eloquence and do not want to share certain private information. Her grandmother came up in abject spirit-crushing poverty in the area where I spent my early childhood years. The poster was in a crisis period. Elizabeth, I'll light a candle for you and your family. Edited December 23, 2011 by annandatje Privacy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renee in NC Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 :iagree: I am very concerned for Elizabeth in MN. We privately discussed the long term psychological effects of relentless extreme poverty, particularly when it is coupled with other life stressors. I have no doubt whatsoever that she is authentic and that at least part of the misunderstanding is due to cultural differences that probably very few people here are familiar with. It is difficult to explain succinctly, especially when I lack eloquence and do not want to share certain private information. Her grandmother came up in abject spirit-crushing poverty in the area where I spent my early childhood years. The poster was in a crisis period. Elizabeth, I'll light a candle for you and your family. I hope she is able to find some peace. I know a little of her story and we had a lot of similarities in our situations in the past. The stress of the situations are almost unbearable at times, and many times you have no real life support. It is very, very hard to be on this board around Christmas when you are in a desperate financial situation. It's no ones fault, of course, but it really brings home how bad things are. In the past I would close the board down because I was crying over the contrast. It's almost necessary to step away at times. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillieBoy Posted December 23, 2011 Author Share Posted December 23, 2011 I'm very happy to see the outpouring of compassion. Please remember it is not for any of us to judge if an outcry is serious or not. Every life counts, regardless. If you or anyone you know show signs or verbalize their intentions to harm themselves, please, please call: 1-800-273-8255 National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*~Tina~* Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 I missed what happened and am not sure which Elizabeth...(someone feel free to PM me)...however having lost my father to suicide...my heart goes out to the OP who is hurting. Please know there are people who care :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Element Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 :grouphug:Elizabeth :grouphug: I didn't comment on the thread last night but I worried about you all night. I hope today is a little better for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 I missed everything, but if a poster needs a listening, private, confidential ear, I am available. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraGB Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 I'm sorry to hear that Elizabeth in MN is troubled. I missed the thread, so if anyone would like to fill me in, I would very much like to know what is going on with her. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Once Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 Obviously I missed something big today, but I hope whom ever it was has found some peace, whether in the form of professional help or just a kind ear. :iagree: Me too. I don't have time to follow all the threads, but I do remember the first few pages of the one in question. I hope Elizabeth finds a friendly ear in real life and that she can find some strength for the New Year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Once Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 I missed everything, but if a poster needs a listening, private, confidential ear, I am available. This is true. I can testify to that. Joanne, I am so grateful to you for your kindness. Anyone could feel confident in Joanne's careful approach to hurting hearts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 does anyone know how to contact her privately? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 I missed it all. Elizabeth, I will be praying for you. I'll even light a candle for you. Please know that there are other families that also have only each other for Christmas and not much else. But that is the important part, being a family. I honestly don't know your story, but know that you are being thought of. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraGB Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 :grouphug: Elizabeth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 :grouphug:Wishing you peace, Elizabeth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 I really, really don’t want to start any drama, but I do have a question or two regarding some recent posts. How does the hive deal with someone threatening to hurt themselves? Has this happened before? Is there any way for the moderator or anyone to get in touch with them in real life to ensure that a person is safe? It did happen once long, long ago. Back in the days of the old boards. Back when the membership was very small and the posters knew each other a whole lot better. It was a long night. I believe tptb managed to locate and get ahold of the poster. (I'm not positive about that though.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted December 23, 2011 Share Posted December 23, 2011 Hive Members, The member in question has been contacted via her private registration information. Please understand that we cannot share this information with those of you who have PM'd us. Thank you for your concerns and prayers. Administrator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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