amy g. Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 My dad had a friendwho moved from Houston to Portland 5 years ago. When she moved, she also moved her mother to a nursing home in Portland. When that happened, my dad got her mother's furniture from the Houston nursing home and stored it in his garage. My dad died a year ago, and when I sold his house, my Dh moved her mom's furniture from my dad's garage to ours and promised to take it to Dallas and deliver it to her daughters house as soon as they told us they were ready for it. Now we are converting our 3car garage into a giant room for Ds for his Christmas present. Dad's friend now wants to come get the furniture and drive it to Portland when she has time. I didn't want to ask, but I fear that her daughter in Dallas might have passed away. Dh wants to buy a storage building to house his saw, the kids bikes and friend's furniture. My question is how tacky would it be to move this beautiful furniture into my house and use it until she is ready to come pick it up? That would save me a little money because I could buy a smaller storage building. What would you do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trresh Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 I would be afraid it would get damaged. I wouldn't use it. It sounds like she doesn't really need it or she wouldn't have stored it for such a long time . Could you offer to buy it? She might give you a good deal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aunty Social Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AK_Mom4 Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 Shipping furniture might be cheaper and easier for an older person (I'm assuming this is an older person) - maybe call and get a quote? I would probably call the friend and ask permission before I used the furniture in my own home. It isn't tacky to ask, but it might be tacky to ask without using (I'm not positive on this one....) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kate CA Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 So it's been 6 years, and they still haven't collected the furniture? I'd be telling them that you are renovating and no longer have room to store it. Give them a deadline to get the furniture, or offer to help them find a storage facility...but no longer store it for them or be responsible for it (including payment for a facility or a larger shed). As far as I'm concerned, they're the ones being tacky by taking up all your storage space for furniture that obviously doesn't mean that much to them - otherwise they'd have gotten it by now. Wow, I completely agree! I can't believe you have kept it for them for so long! That is really kind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lara in Colo Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 I find talking to very helpful. Explain the situation to her. She has gotten free storage for a long time. She may feel inclined to pay the difference for a larger place. She may want to come and get it sooner. She may tell you to just keep it. You never know unless you talk to her. You know what assuming does. Give her the respect of asking about her preferences. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OLG Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 So it's been 6 years, and they still haven't collected the furniture? I'd be telling them that you are renovating and no longer have room to store it. Give them a deadline to get the furniture, or offer to help them find a storage facility...but no longer store it for them or be responsible for it (including payment for a facility or a larger shed). As far as I'm concerned, they're the ones being tacky by taking up all your storage space for furniture that obviously doesn't mean that much to them - otherwise they'd have gotten it by now. Precisely what I was going to say! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted November 22, 2011 Author Share Posted November 22, 2011 I want to add that I've known my dad's friend since I was in 3rd grade, and Dh and I would do anything for her. We would be happy to deliver it to Dallas, but we really don't have the time to take it to Portland, although if I told Dh he needed to do that, I know he would make it happen. I agree about damaging it, but honestly, is my house more dangerous than my garage? And my dad's garage was falling down and leaking. I do not think it is things they need, but it is family heirlooms that they feel bad getting rid of. When we had to evacuate for the wildfires, dh called her to ask what he needed to try and save. She said it could all burn except the painting of my dad. I guess I'll have Dh call and ask if she would mind if we use it until she gets it. I only hesitated to do this because I know it will make her feel more guilty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 Tacky on their part for sure! Communication is key. Be honest. You have been more than fair. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellers Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 ... As far as I'm concerned, they're the ones being tacky by taking up all your storage space for furniture that obviously doesn't mean that much to them - otherwise they'd have gotten it by now. I agree! I can't image asking anyone to store a bunch of furniture for six+ years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laundrycrisis Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 I would not use it, but I would tell her you are no longer able to store it. If she still wants to keep it she can rent a storage space for it using a CC over the phone and faxing forms back and forth, and then you can either offer to move it in for her and lock it up, or she can hire movers to come to your house and do it. Otherwise it's time for her to give you permission to either keep it forever or donate it. Move it to storage, give it to you, or allow you to donate it. Three choices. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 Obviously you're close to the friend. Just call her and tell her what you told us. Ask her what she'd like you to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simka2 Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 We have a friend storing something for us in Kansas City. I feel badly, but it is a pop-up and I cannot get it now. This person is moving and so today I had to call another friend to see if it they would store it until we can get it. It is so awkward having to have friends hold your stuff for you! That said, I am the one who is very grateful for their help and willingness. We have always said they could use the pop-up whenever they wanted to since they are being so kind to us. I would just call them and be honest. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aggieamy Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 Obviously you're close to the friend. Just call her and tell her what you told us. Ask her what she'd like you to do. :iagree:. She might be relieved to have an option to get rid of it without having to give it to Goodwill or something. It's easier to get rid of things with sentimental value when you know the person is going to love it and appreciate it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 So it's been 6 years, and they still haven't collected the furniture? I'd be telling them that you are renovating and no longer have room to store it. Give them a deadline to get the furniture, or offer to help them find a storage facility...but no longer store it for them or be responsible for it (including payment for a facility or a larger shed). As far as I'm concerned, they're the ones being tacky by taking up all your storage space for furniture that obviously doesn't mean that much to them - otherwise they'd have gotten it by now. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lara in Colo Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 We have a friend storing something for us in Kansas City. I feel badly, but it is a pop-up and I cannot get it now. This person is moving and so today I had to call another friend to see if it they would store it until we can get it. It is so awkward having to have friends hold your stuff for you! That said, I am the one who is very grateful for their help and willingness. We have always said they could use the pop-up whenever they wanted to since they are being so kind to us. I would just call them and be honest. ;) I'll store it for you!!!! My neighbors won't care and I could use it to keep the camping gear in!! Just say'n..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 I would think it would be safer in your house, than in a shed. I would just ask her if she would mind, and mention the safer in the house part. I bet she tells you to keep it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ritsumei Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 Obviously you're close to the friend. Just call her and tell her what you told us. Ask her what she'd like you to do. :iagree: This sounds very reasonable for the level of closeness you seem to have. It's awkward to start that conversation, but I find it often clears the air & is better for the relationship than just letting it sit with growing guilt /frustration taking its toll on your relationship with the friend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simka2 Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 I'll store it for you!!!! My neighbors won't care and I could use it to keep the camping gear in!! Just say'n..... :D Yes, but then I would have to force myself to Colorado to get it!!! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 So it's been 6 years, and they still haven't collected the furniture? I'd be telling them that you are renovating and no longer have room to store it. Give them a deadline to get the furniture, or offer to help them find a storage facility...but no longer store it for them or be responsible for it (including payment for a facility or a larger shed). As far as I'm concerned, they're the ones being tacky by taking up all your storage space for furniture that obviously doesn't mean that much to them - otherwise they'd have gotten it by now. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted November 23, 2011 Author Share Posted November 23, 2011 Well, it seems that my poor communication skills apply to my husband as well. I just asked him what he thought about asking to use the furniture and he said he thought she would be happy for us to. Apparently, when she was visiting last month, he asked about her daughter who did not pass away, but is continuing to live with her cancer. They want to save the family furiture in case the granddaughter wants it someday. Dh will call my dad's friend and see if we can use it, but give it to her if she comes to get it or if her granddaughter wants it. With anyone else I wouldn't agree to this because once people use things, they start thinking it belongs to them. We gave this friend many things of my dad's with the agreement that she would will them back to my kids, and when her aunt died, Miss Good admired the Chineese artifacts my friend inherited, so she just gave her the most valuable one. I really have no fear that things will damage the relationship. I just didn't want her to feel more guilty, because it is an imposition. Fortunately, dh is already taking care of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 You never know unless you talk to her. :iagree:Not tacky to ask. Storage? Unless it is pristine and climate controlled, I expect long-stored items to get dusty, moldy, micey and snakey. I'd LIKE you to keep it in the house, if you were not hooligans. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 So it's been 6 years, and they still haven't collected the furniture? I'd be telling them that you are renovating and no longer have room to store it. Give them a deadline to get the furniture, or offer to help them find a storage facility...but no longer store it for them or be responsible for it (including payment for a facility or a larger shed). As far as I'm concerned, they're the ones being tacky by taking up all your storage space for furniture that obviously doesn't mean that much to them - otherwise they'd have gotten it by now. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSMom2One Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 I find talking to very helpful. Explain the situation to her. She has gotten free storage for a long time. She may feel inclined to pay the difference for a larger place. She may want to come and get it sooner. She may tell you to just keep it. You never know unless you talk to her. You know what assuming does. Give her the respect of asking about her preferences. Well said! I agree completely. Blessings, Lucinda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2denj Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 Obviously you're close to the friend. Just call her and tell her what you told us. Ask her what she'd like you to do. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aunty Social Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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